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messages to ceilings:
(click here to add new message):

from doctorkaysen :
definitely, i gotta finish the issue though. itll probably be done by this weekend.
from doctorkaysen :
i put a spread for ceilings on the back cover of my zine DEGENERATE. you inspire me☺
from doctorkaysen :
being human sucks, i don't think we're missing anything.
from spires :
i used to always eat breakfast in the shower until one day i dropped my cereal bowl and all the shards tore into my feet. (don't drop your tea in the shower!)
from moodswing :
giiiirl. i adore you. you inspire me to be so much more open than i am. <3
from guitarphreak :
hey girl!Guess what I got in the mail yesterday!? THE ZINE! I've never been so excited. It is amazing beyond words. I want to thank you for giving me the opportunity to be a part of something so great. Honestly, i'm honoured. you rock. xo nikki.
from serpentsong :
I keep a picture of the goddess Kali in our condo
from dontremember :
yessssssss
from cherrykissme :
It is unfortunate that things like that are going on and are being perpetrated by authority figures are *supposed* to trust. It was a good thing that she had you there to intervene. Everyone should look out for each other.
from spires :
thanks!--you've got it more.
from moodswing :
'the silence inside surrender' ***
from shotsofvodka :
hey darlin, here's my combo... username: like pw: omg
from cherrykissme :
Hey, Just read your newest entry. I'm curious--what were they carrying that woman off for? I also wanted to drop some words of encouragement for you in that you ARE human, no matter how some jerks treat you.
from cached :
Yeah, when's the deadline, love...because I need a lot of time to think ideas, etc.
from guitarphreak :
also, i'm working on a submission for your zine, referred to in you post dated 16 June 2009. tell me it's not too late...
from guitarphreak :
i like your writing. where do you hail from?
from psych0bunnie :
not sure what a zine is, lol. totally gotta wiki that sometimes. but sure. my writings not superb. but what the heck, right? <3
from shewholies :
I'd absolutely love to be a part of it! Email me, love: nicholeia@hotmail.com
from psych0bunnie :
I'm never good with notes. But I think you are amazing. I like and I like. Just wanted you to know.
from shotsofvodka :
thanks! I haven't been writing lately but I'll be back when my computer is fixed. :) I could use my boy's computer but I wouldn't want him to somehow find this so that's a no go...
from cached :
by the way, new info: username: cached password: lost
from cached :
YAY, yay, yay!
from cached :
I wanna contribute to your zine...sounds like an awesome idea, I've always wanted to start one but never have, so at the very least, I can submit right? If I submit, can I get a copy? =D
from shewholies :
Especially if they're fathers to children who's cheeks you'll never kiss, with women they look through you to see.
from shewholies :
I loved your newest entry; I had the same epiphony about relationships. I wish I could've used your words! I missed you while you were gone, your writing gives me goosebumps. =) I'm sending you good vibrations, doll.
from alivetoyou :
i feel really fucked up a lot of the time too.
from cached :
I haven't talked to you in forever, I just hope I get to again at some point.
from atwowaydream :
I'm sure donna would rather enjoy a conversation; it's the lonely who most need a lifeline.
from lawliiet :
Not too long ago I picked up my bass out of the blue and things are already seeming to flow in a way they didn't before. It makes me happy and I'm happy for you as well...
from shewholies :
Your note got me through a very rough night! I wish I could hear you play your guitar. <3
from it-is :
s'always time--time's the only thing we got, 'til we haven't got anything at all. makes up our whole lives; what we think of as being our lives, anyway. was a good thing to be reading at five in the morning. appreciated. x
from shewholies :
I adore you! <3 Good luck on the man hunt, sweets!
from missindia :
i love ur latest entry e. whoever ur talking about deserves you in the exact glory you write about. like you called it. you rock. xox
from shewholies :
I love you, darlin! You're an exquisite tea cup, you have a few hairline cracks and a chip or two, but you're still regal, still beautiful, and I drink every word you write like fine wine. Sending you positive vibes!
from papersails :
I watched your extreme closeup video... that courtney love poster in the background, I have the exact same one
from vomit-stars :
read and write with me. let's be creative mastery. genius, clarity, language and symbols. that's all we'll need.
from masturboy :
Sounds like you've got what you need inside -- great stuff!
from shewholies :
Be careful, darling. We need strong, independant bitches like you in the world. Love, love, love!
from raven72d :
Lovely!
from shewholies :
oh my god, I love your writing. your latest entry is beautiful as are you. you're by far my favorite read. if we lived in the same town, i'd let you seduce me happily.
from lawliiet :
I love your background, Courtney rocks beyond words. Oh, wondering, have you ever thought of becoming a stripper? Put those tits on display, ha.
from raven72d :
the latest entry is...intriguing...
from lawliiet :
I wrote a poem about you but it got erased. I probably wouldnt have sent it to you but since it no longer exists, I can at least tell you it /did/ exist. Sigh. Im a weirdo and should probably smoke less. Au revoire.
from shewholies :
I love you!
from cannibalhymn :
I love your entry about "giving him to Ishtar". I need to do the same.
from atwowaydream :
hitting is the earthquake equivalent of relationships. Fuck him. You're so strong, and he will only try to take that strength from you and truly, you're too good to become a paper doll.
from neeeeek :
Damn, what a motherfu*. You deserve better, don't ya be sad
from and-darling :
I like reading you. It's... I don't know how to explain it really. But I like it.
from and-darling :
Drinking?
from and-darling :
Hey. How long have you been gone for?
from errantnights :
tis
from elliestuff :
I liked this. So honest.
from shewholies :
Don't forget who you are and what makes you amazing. Hair is sexy. <3
from raven72d :
I can't recall if I've read you before--- but I very much should have.
from shewholies :
LOVE XOXOX
from missindia :
hey cutie, missing you! ur hushed refrain leaves me no choice but to leave enormous displays of love on your diary :P confusion is messy when you are stoned out of your mind. MEssy like my heart hurts!? xo
from missindia :
grr, i hate anxiety too...the other day, i got an email regarding my pictures in an art gallery, and it said to respond by june2, but the email was sent to me june4, so I wrote them back and mentioned this, but I kept on worrying about it, hoping they could sell it etc, like over and over again...when a huge portrait that I was sitting under fell on my head! i really think i made it happen cause i was so anxious and it was like the goddess's way of telling me 'duh!, its gonna be ok'. anyway, i miss you, i sent you a long wall message on fb... xoxo
from cached :
By the way, gimme your email, woman, and you'll get a password.
from cached :
Sounds like someone's in a poetic mood. :)
from cached :
I like how you stay true to yourself and say 'fuck it' to the rest. Keep doing your own thing, keep marching to your own beat, keep on being you because you're inspiring me to be me too. It's hard sometimes to stay true to yourself, I almost sold out for the nice things that life has to offer me, but then I realized, I'd much rather take the harder road and earn what I can for myself and be happy living as me, instead of living as a sham and having other people dictate my life as they hand me expensive things. Fuck that. I'm going to remain true to me, despite the obstacles, despite the harassment. I like myself and don't want to give myself up for what somebody else defines 'normal' as.
from retro-cat :
women will some day have all the cake in the world :)
from shewholies :
You're in my heart. You're writing is eerily close the world in my head. XOXOXO
from cached :
You can get through this--don't get too down, there are always invisible hands everywhere supporting you and wanting to help pull you to your feet. Don't ever give up, and know that you're worth everything. ♥
from missindia :
(I would come easily to you, if you wanted me to... muah nish) i always say to myself that fear is the enemy, that theres nothing to fear but fear itself, but still in my heart, I get scared. Pivotal moments, when I need to speak out, or do something, I let slide. And then I feel like a failure, its a vicious cycle, but you gotta know that its never too late, that the goddess still loves you, and the reality that you want is still there, so you can work on it...take me posting this twice as an example...i messed up, but I posted it again...lol
from missindia :
I would come easily to you, if you wanted me to... muah nish i always say to myself that fear is the enemy, that theres nothing to fear but fear itself, but still in my heart, I get scared. Pivotal moments, when I need to speak out, or do something, I let slide. And then I feel like a failure, its a vicious cycle, but you gotta know that its never too late, that the goddess still loves you, and the reality that you want is still there, so you can work on it...
from raven72d :
Vur' intriguing...
from cannibalhymn :
I was just thinking the other day that I hate how anti-abortionists are called "pro-life". As if pro-choicers are ANTI-life?
from shewholies :
Zines sound interesting, it's a world I never quite got into, though. You should totally hook me up. Love your latest shit, babe.
from elliestuff :
You're just an amazing writer. But you probably know that, already.
from shewholies :
I just started with guitar and know, like, one chord. But, hell, even Hendrix had to start somewhere. XOXOXO
from boyafterboy :
i was just looking at yer diary the other day... &letters to selves are always wonderful. i can't say i embezzled money either (doesn't embezzle sound like something really fancy, instead of something mean?) but its all a metaphor for something else, its always a metaphor. but oh the possibilities are endless... even at the bottom. because once you've hit bottom, there's nowhere to go but up.
from cached :
Thanks for the advice. I just hope I can afford one, and hopefully, I can talk my parents into not kicking me out if I happen to get one. They tend to get intense about the dumbest of things.
from herdarlinsin :
How do you do what you do? Im mesmerized by the actions you take to solve your hearts desires, no-strings-attached in that sort of way. Not thaqtI could do it myself, but you leave so much to one's imagination. (and now Im curious as to how fine your breasts are ;)
from tragicskies :
thanks for your advice. it's what a lot of others have said too. you're right. people don't change.
from tragicskies :
'i want to learn how to ride a bike.' i thought i was the only one!
from cached :
With your latest entry, I feel like I'm getting a chance to see the real you. I think it summed up what you said in your diary and in my notes page pretty well. Hope you didn't mind me referencing you. :) I think too many people put too much pressure on what society says are good goals to have (have a big paycheck, get a degree, all that jazz), but nobody says, "do what makes you happy", so I'm telling you in return (like you said to me), do what makes you happy. I'm working towards happiness. It's so hard to take an active role in life, I'm so used to playing a supporting role, play a clever smart-ass girl in the background, but never the lead. Here's my chance to play the lead. I just gotta get used to how it feels to be in the spotlight.
from cached :
I understand it completely. (Just my damn allergies don't let me appreciate it to the full potential, pausing for some Kleenexes every five seconds isn't very exciting for me.) There are just places where you go to feel alive. I love to go hiking, when my allergies aren't ridiculous. I think that I've always defined everything in an unconventional way. If school isn't what makes you happy, then don't do it. Success isn't always a six-figure income and a big house with a maid and a Porsche. Success is what makes YOU happy, what makes you feel like you're doing something about your life. Me? I'm an experience whore, I'll try anything once (within reason), and if it's good, I'll do it again. I just want to soak up as much as I can while I'm alive. Fuck office jobs where you're sitting in a cube, fuck doing what everyone else says unless it's something I want. This is my life and no one else's, and I'll do what I want to shine. Don't shy away from whatever your personal spotlight happens to be, and if it's nature so be it. I can understand why those bowling balls mean so much to you, they embody the spirit of getting caught in that moment. It's not weird, honey. You've just found your niche.
from ashtraygurl :
you're fucking gorgeous, darling.
from cached :
Then, fuck university. Don't go to school. Don't live for anyone else. Live for yourself. Do what makes you happy. Get your hands dirty, and love what you do.
from cached :
Well, I've never had a conventional outlook on sex, and I definitely agree with what you're saying. I still consider what I did with my ex-girlfriend as sex, even though we're two women, I still consider giving blow jobs sex, and I still consider all those other options (excepting hand jobs) sex, it's just not the textbook definition of sex. I guess I can have sex with a guy, and he CAN pleasure me (obviously from reading your diary I can tell you are pleasured by men as well), but you're right, it's not really a matter of what is occurring subsequently to the woman. It's basically so long as a man puts his penis inside a woman, it's sex...even if it's for two seconds, it's still sex, by the textbook definition. Sounds like an interesting essay. Taking a sexual psychology class? How old are you, anyway, if you don't mind me asking? By the way, I always hated finding sources, I'm pretty much the authoritative source on everything. *smiles* I remember in high school my best friend always made up sources and made up a publishing company, Green something or another. I ended up following suit when I ran short of sources.
from cached :
Makes me think... Is sex itself sexist?
from cached :
You know, the update about men and women's roles during sex made me think. Sex is usually so demeaning to women, it doesn't have to be that way, but it just seems like another situation where a man controls the situation. Regardless of whether the woman's on top or the man's on top, who's doing most of the work, it all comes down to the penis in the vagina, and the man ends up dominating the woman. Strange, huh?
from cached :
It's such a beautiful red...so vibrant. I was nicknamed "Fire".
from shewholies :
You're beautiful. I had that hair color once; it makes you feel like an instant sex God. PS, thanks for the birthday wishes, sweetheart!
from cached :
I love your hair, reminds me of Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind...my favorite movie. I had my hair that color once upon a time.
from herdarlinsin :
you cant help it that you love sex, you little sex finatic you. :P
from cannibalhymn :
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of having an orgasm, and one time it happened when all I was dreaming about was that I was tuning a guitar.
from hissings :
I want to add every entry you write to my favorite entries. Your writing is so alive it has mojo all of its own! For the record, I am a psych ward survivor who doesn't shave her armpits and have been known to worship the Goddess. Blessed Be! xoxosylviacobain
from herdarlinsin :
damn girl. people should be inspired by you :)
from shewholies :
You're like a more expierienced version of myself and I'm so entirely fascinated by you! You're so right about being driven by the emptiness, it's something I never would've put together myself but can't deny. And, I think, that if there's any justice in this world you're going to find someone who loves you completely and totally and can fuck like a God. XOXO
from cached :
Thanks, hon.
from cached :
I really don't--I'm meant to be loveless.
from cached :
I'll have to remember what you say about faeries, my peripherals were never my strong point. I appreciate what you said except, well, I can't agree with you. Even if everyone does it, I still feel like the queen of bitches when I do it. Thing is I convinced myself that I deserved love, and the more I think on it, the more I think I don't deserve love at all. And I'm not awesome-that's just an illusion. I suck, actually.
from cached :
I'll have to keep my eyes open for faeries. I'm usually too slow to catch them or to even see them, but I'll never lose belief. <3 Take care of yourself, hon.
from shewholies :
You are beautiful. I fall in love with every entry you write. XOXO
from cached :
I have often been compared to a weeping willow...not because merely of my emotions but just the certain way they carry themselves. I'll have to go find myself a weeping willow to sit under and wait for a faery...do they grant wishes ever? I could use some wish-granting. <3
from herdarlinsin :
yellow hurts lol - too early in the morn for such brightness ... my eyes, my eyes
from cached :
I wish I had known this secret sooner.
from herdarlinsin :
Thanks for the add, sweet :) I hope you dont find yourself too disappointed by what you do read.
from herdarlinsin :
Ive read a lot fo your writings here this morning, and its hard for me to see you as this kind of sexmindfreak (not said in a bad way) so much it seems - it consumes, and makes you starve for so many different colorful desires. I (almost) wish I more like you. a sexmindfreak too. Heh. I love the way you express. truly
from chalkstain :
and i spend most of my time staring at ceilings. coincidence? i think not.
from cached :
I'm so glad!
from cached :
You write like the beat writers did...there's something very poetic and edgy about your writing. Something I happen to like a lot. I want to read more of what you write, so I hope you don't mind if I add you as a favorite.
from birds-cry :
thanks. i didnt even think anyone read mine anymore :)
from saggymoon :
yeah... society is always so shocked whenever a woman is a *bad mother.* it's like this whole major affront to the *apple pie* thing, if ya know what I mean. I'm so glad I'm never having kids, and my fiancee feels the same way... I can be as fucked up as I want! lol... glad to hear you didn't gag on his dick, just lookin' our for ya... peace xoxosaggymoon
from saggymoon :
I meant *gag* instead of *gave in the previous note
from saggymoon :
wait, why'd you puke on his dick? were you sick, or did giving that guy head make you gave really bad? :( cheers, saggymoon
from saggymoon :
You worship Britney Spears? Isn't she the antithesis of Courtney Love? I'd be interested to hear your take on it. :) xoxosaggymoon
from sadmaroon :
Um, "ceilings..." I've considered you an online buddy for awhile, and I have to say, lately, I'm kind of worried about you. i mean, not that I'm the poster girl for stability myself, but i can't help it, I am. It's not because you took some sleazy older man home with you, it's not because you hate a boyfriend you said a few weeks ago you were madly in love with and the solution was cheating on him, it wasn't when you said way back that your other boyfriend at that time liked to watch you fuck his friends, it wasn't when you joined SG. I don't know. I just don't know why I feel this way enough to formulate it into a lecture. it's everything i just listed but not simply that. talk to me: threeblackhounds@hotmail.com I'm sorry if you are insulted or angry-- the last thing i want to do is insult or anger you.
from sadmaroon :
i better start praying to ishtar, though, because my fiancee's friend seriously thinks I'm a whore and it's gotten to the point where I believe her. Also: Mary Magdalene is also the patron saint of whores. So we got 2 on our side up there! :)
from sadmaroon :
I pary to St. Dymphna-- the patron saint of those with mental illness. believe me, we are scorned and neglected, too.
from sadmaroon :
I'm saggymoon/iwantobeliev/foxinsnow's alter-ego. ok, so, i really love your poem about ishtar and i can't wait to find out who this dude Omar is. check out sadmaroon! (shameless plug)lust, sadmaroon
from saggymoon :
i wish i had sexual desire like yours. I've had it before, and that makes it even more painful that my depression, my meds, and my sore pussy take it away from me.
from raw-hate :
beautiful writing. i love it.
from pan-rock :
hey grrrl, i think i owe you an apology. i was really drunk when i confided in you about ash. you are free to do what you want, and i shudnt have told you that. i think i was just hoping a little that we could make out or go back to what we used to be without actually going back to what we used to be like. Cause ofcourse we have changed, and there were issues then that arent there now, thank the goddess. I want you to know that I didnt really date either after you, grrrls are so much more complicated and there was the thing that i was still in love with you, and still kinda am, you will always have a place in my heart kore regardless of if we are friends or more or not. I mean, i had been dreaming about you, and sending out good energy towards you for a while, and then we connected again, and im really grateful that ours is a bridge that didnt get burned down. especailly cause a nazi faggot piece of shit really wanted that to happen and tried to interefere where he wasnt wanted. To this day, I think that our magick together wud drive any evil away, we just never spoke much about it. anyway, lots of love kore. i hope to see you soon.
from milesofsky :
hey darling, i don't know if you've noticed this, but your favorite diaries list got a little warped. it's showing doubles of everyone.
from retro-cat :
amazing!! Hi from Julia.
from milesofsky :
beautiful ♥
from pan-rock :
the goddess loves you. xoxo
from milesofsky :
ugh, that pisses me off so bad! i would have given you the money too, darling. AND i would have slapped that jerk across the face for making things difficult. i'm glad you're okay and you got home safely. <3
from missfickles :
Thanks for joining the bisexual diaryring! Nice to see you again. ;)
from girlkisses :
t.a.t.u., sixpence none the richer, martina mcbride. Thanks for the lovely notes, and the understanding ones.
from milesofsky :
your writing is beautiful and i love it. thank you for the kind words. <3
from milesofsky :
thank you :]
from unavowed :
yeah, i have the "render" video from ani, it's on there :) -- other additions: bjork, frou frou/imogen heap, alanis morisette, jewel, seven year bitch, azure ray, gregory & the hawk, cat power, computor girl, the cranberries, dresden dolls, goldfrapp. gravy train, huggy bear, sarah mclachlan, jack off jill/scarling, janish joplin, jill sobule, joydrop, kidney thieves, ladytron, lamb, lisa loeb, liz phair, macy gray, madonna, mazzy star, michelle branch, mirah, miss kittin, pat benatar, peaches, plumb (hooray for fruit?), poe, portishead, rainer maria, regina spektor, rilo kiley, the breeders, tsunami bomb, vanessa carlton, air, shiny toy guns -- totally just scrolled through mp3 collection and picked out all the ladies.
from milesofsky :
Tegan & Sara! -- sorry, i forgot to add a suggestion to my previous note :] ALSO, check out Uh Huh Her, they are AMAZING. <3
from unavowed :
bitch & animal <3
from milesofsky :
i'm loving your grrrrrrl music entry. it's so true. listening to girls singing amazing, beautiful lyrics always puts me in a better mood and it makes me happy to be female. i've added you, by the way.
from x-centricity :
...flyleaf...
from ashtraygurl :
I was having an awful day til I read your post. Live through this. I can. You will. Riot Grrl. We ARE.
from pan-rock :
I want you to know that I really care about you. In the old days, caelan was really abusive to me, and I was not ok. I wanted to run so far and scream so loud, but I wanted to crash back into your harbour. I wanted us to be fastened together so the world around us dissappeared and all the dirtiness and all the ugliness would be gone.I remember still that As we lay with our hands entwined, the bruises suddenly got warm inside and my walls became purple and pink. I want us to be close, i want you to be my queen and i want to be your muse lol. I am sorry about the past, I am here for you, and I love you. I want to cook you meals, and buy you bangles cause you always meant something to me. I think you are so beautiful and kick ass. Theres so much that I realized when we broke up. I wrote love poetry about you, and I didnt know who or what i was talking about, i was that disconnected. There was this time when we did e, and i had a vision of you as an old wise woman with long hair. And I knew I'd want to come home to that, Time couldnt come between our relationship, and I always knew we'd know each other again. I am so sorry for all thats happened to you, what you are going through. Feel free to call me at 647 293 0525. I miss you. Also, I dont like the idea of some boy possible restricting something in our lives, so I will pay for the table, unless you were planning on using him, but maybe you can use him for other things, and im sure wed make the money back in sales. If you come to Buddies in Bad Times Theatre on wednesday(tomorrow, its free), I can give you the money to send them and check out a free show, and im gonna be in it. Come for 7.30 and after im done, i can hang with you! we can go for coffee, or maybe you will let me treat you to some dinner. For canzine, I wanna bring samosas, and some sort of baked something (if i have time) also, you are my only friend on my diaryland, but i kinda like that, so i will write entries that i think only you are priveleged to for you there. I love that we can be there for one another through journals too. And I want you to know that we have cockroaches too. They are gross, but when i found one in my oatmeal, that was the last straw and i kill them whenever i see them. Im sorry that you have to deal with roaches too, but i have to tell you, in india they are almost three times the size here. ; {
from missfickles :
Thanks for joining the perverted diaryring! -MF-
from pan-rock :
erin, i am hoping you are feeling better, i said a lil prayer for you. I heart you. xoxo
from suckerinlove :
=) i like your entries. raw truth is beauty.
from heidiann :
I've missed reading you. I'm happy I can do it again. Also, I love Belladonna so yay for that.
from byebeautiful :
thank you, so much.
from unavowed :
i also need to go to bed. but my eyes don't want to shut.
from sadmaroon :
I e-=mailed you but couldn't get thru... I would like a copy of your zine, email me at threeblackhounds@hotmail.com for my snail mail addy
from sadmaroon :
from thhe artiste formerly known as foxinsnow: i hhave two other working blogs... saggymoon (photo blog) and iwantobeliev (rants) sadmaroon is my grief blog. much <3, sadmaroon
from sugarbabylon :
thank you so much ^-^
from x-centricity :
Thanks for adding me, Sugar! *huggles*

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