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messages to chiv:
(click here to add new message):

from badinage :
what to do? don't leave d.land for the blog. everyone blogs. be different. stay with us. minority style.
from uberjnet :
I've been awake that many millions of hours without sleep. Seven and a half? More like seven and a laff! Piffle. Now, the many millions of hours you go without checking your notes on dland.....that remains to be seen. Still here, still Canadian....
from tater-fay :
I'm still here (though I don't update too often..just don't care to anymore)but I do read you when you update.
from mister-ed :
there's you, there's strawberrri, there's empezar and there's smartypants. occasionally someone else updates. that's all i read from diaryland. pretty much. wait no i'm forgetting someone. i dunno where you should move to. somewhere a bit more open tho, internetually speaking. geographically speaking, i can recommend normandy, except they don't sell crackers.
from seedpod :
oh and seedpod... tis for you the one title Birthday...
from seedpod :
For you see, evidently there's a dark storm coming And the chain on my swing is squeaking like a mouse.... I miss you a f-ofalot. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. There's a million little poems about you in my head. Strange boy I miss you. How old are you already? :P
from tater-fay :
Just saying "Hi!" Not much going on here...our house looks like a 1910 shack (cuz Larry has torn it to shit) and I have a big 7-months-pregnant belly and I waddle like a penguin (ok, not THAT bad)...
from dogbones :
Want to draw attention to your diary? Check me out! I can help! If you don't then ignore this note and just think of it as a Kudos ;)
from affablealien :
You're still around? More fans of writing to nobody significant. Let's drink and pass out under a bridge somewhere. I insist.
from seedpod :
I cut better hair than that. What you doing?
from illumiknitti :
Haha yeah, I'm on a letter-writing kick these days. I promise to cover the Vitamin Water letter soon, so your comment will go back into context. Not that anyone actually reads my diary...it's a little depressing, actually.
from apathee :
aw, it's lovely, that haircut, l.
from mister-ed :
55 days! waaa!
from tater-fay :
Was your mom talking about Meatloaf ("Paradise By the Dashboard Lights?") or like, the um...meat loaf. The loaf of meat for dinner. I wonder if eating meat loaf is mostly just an American thing!
from uberjnet :
i didn't realise that there are 14 months in the year. lousy smarch weather....
from mister-ed :
all go aye, tho i'd rather it all gone. australia for me next year, i hope, eventually.
from tater-fay :
I admit that I had to look up the word "scouse" on wikipedia. Found out much more than I ever wanted to know about that word!
from delighted :
delighted/youknowit
from degausser :
you're silly and amuse me.
from seedpod :
don't. do. don't. do. you should could will.... sometimes patterns take a long time to shift... you've got one.. you'll fall back onto it.. but it'll be easier to fall out of and back into the good stuff every time. soon you'll be falling onto good things all the time and it'll be breaking a good pattern that happens from time to time as opposed to breaking a bad pattern from time to time... miss you
from gypped :
take it as a compliment silly billy!
from tater-fay :
That's great news!!
from tater-fay :
ha ha..Nice "Trainspotting" reference. I just re-watched that recently.
from tater-fay :
Man, that really sucks! I think I'd try to call your employer back AGAIN (as if the first time wasn't enough..why is he being dishonest, I wonder?) and emphasize that he needs to call them and tell them exactly what he told you. Maybe it wouldn't help though. I hope this all works out in your favor!!!
from tater-fay :
Lucid dreams are the best. I wish I'd have one soon. I've only had 2 of them in my life and that was almost 20 years ago, I think...I loved having total control over everything. In my second one, though..I'd have control and then lose it and then have control and then lose it again...Fairuza Balk, huh? I can see that she is attractive, but DAMN..she scares me (The Craft, American History X)..ok, granted those are just characters she plays, but still...frightening eyes she has.
from division-day :
funniest dream ever! i like the second one, too.
from tater-fay :
oh good. You are still alive. Just kidding. Bacon rocks my socks off..too bad I have massive heart burn right now.
from delighted :
Indeed. How we have changed. This is not quite in reply to you but what I wanted to say none the less.
from retro-cat :
i have yet to read a Kurt Vonnegut book. :)
from apathee :
i shall be the little red riding hood in the cotswolds...can't you make it there?
from tater-fay :
hey there, Christopher Robinson. Asparagus makes your pee smell, like..asparagus!! I had this dream about you sometime in the past week but I CANNOT remember what happened in it. I just know that you were in it. Nothing bad happened to you, though, I'm certain.
from seedpod :
Asparagus hee hee. I hate asparagus. I hear its one of the oldest vegetables (still in its ancient form) and used to grow in caves- or still does or something. You're not down there mining for asparagus are you? Come back soon please.
from tater-fay :
synchronicity....just earlier today i was finishing douglas couplands Microserfs and a character decides to become a commmunist in it and anywyas some funny dialogue happens because of this::then i come to this internet cafe in gent and skim over your entry:::
from gypped :
what does justin case mean?
from mister-ed :
ahh how's today? i just had a job interview and i think my soul leaked out, there's a hollow dread feeling around, or i'm hungry.
from delighted :
Oh a write-off would be cool. We could blog ourselves to death. (I am continuing a conversation with your last entry.Hello.)
from mister-ed :
gahhh i want your drunken wandering life. i like wandering, and drunken. i'm sitting in the library with a sense of wow-i-awoke-in-the-actual-morning, mixed with a sense of i-ultra-need-a-job.
from tater-fay :
Yea, the beer is pretty fucking cheap. I prefer the Pilsner Urquell (sp?) over Budvar, but that is just me!!
from tater-fay :
I like ravens. I like to pet them. Actually, they never let me. Am still in Prague. The Czech people are pretty....unfriendly, or maybe it's me? Still, it's a great place. I wonder what vienna will be like? Or Venice or Florence for that matter? I think I'm just going to give up this travelling thing and go back and stay in The Netherlands for the rest of my trip...nah, maybe not. I'm rambling. When do you go back to England?
from mister-ed :
chiv chiv chiv, you can have all the money you can fit up your nose.
from tater-fay :
aw..you are too smart for your own fucking good (Actually, one can never be too smart!) Anyways, hello! I am as high as a kite on crack..actually, it just feels that way because I have serious jet lag. The toilets in the Netherlands (at least in Tracy's house) sit up High which makes me laugh...the tea bags are TINY (everything in The Netherlands seems small and cute)...I'm happy, so happy to be travelling now!! They eat mayonnaise on their fries, though, which sickens me.
from tater-fay :
*waves back, does a dorky dance*..Thanks!! How ya doin'?
from apathee :
maybe someday you wil come with me, to the magic faraway tree.
from tater-fay :
well, ya know...I'll let you in on a little secret: you're cute! It's ok to accept the fact that you are cute!
from moonshine76 :
i too, am alive! i'd send friends too if i could. rock on. i will be in touch. :D
from moonshine76 :
hey, i hope you are still alive, dude. buzz me soon.
from tater-fay :
glad you made it over there safely! Have fun and I have two words for you: SUN BLOCK!
from tater-fay :
So, what did you have to get vaccinated for to go to Australia? Did it hurt? OUCH!! Are you on the plane..are you on the ground? Are you dreaming? It's sunny here and the leaves are bright but falling..Missy, the cat, has a bladder infection..poor little Miss Miss..I'm going out to lunch now..BYE! xoxo
from gypped :
I liked this entry :)
from cedartrees :
dude. how's it going? just tried to sign your book. did you go? huh? huh? did ya?
from tater-fay :
I'm so excited that you have your tickets and are going! I'm in Illinois currently..mom died 3 weeks ago...blah, blah, blah. Have a great time!
from chiv :
Ah! I don't get notifications of notes, do I? Look! Notes I've not read! ...to be this excited, I must be really fuckin lonely! Yay! sigh.
from elgan :
I wouldn't mind knowing where you've moved to. I occasionally log into LJ as gangolino. Occasionally.
from lady-dra :
I've said that I'd leave like at least 10 times, I just can never stick to it I guess. >.<
from bi-pet :
i really enjoy reading you. don't give up...
from tater-fay :
I give you permission (because you KNOW you need MY permission) to leave Diaryland as long as you keep us all up-to-date on MySpace and blah blah blah. Those little wine glass "jewelry" thingies that clink around when you drink...I really can't stand them!!
from slapmeharder :
you're amusing when you're cranky
from elgan :
Sorry I disappeared so suddenly on you last night. The power went out in a blaze of darkness, and the internet was fried, so I went to bed. Mwah!
from elgan :
I hate your new layout. It looks exactly like the diaryland news site. So there! (Insert evil laugh here)
from heckafresh :
JESUS! Fine, I'm talking about our god damned diaries and the keeping of them.
from heckafresh :
Or your new template.
from heckafresh :
If you don't know exactly what I mean, don't guess, but it has nothing to do with the fact that I am tempted by the smell of cuttlefish nearly enough to do the wrong thing.
from heckafresh :
I am indifferent. I miss octigirl. I want a guestbook instead of only notes. I am mentally ill, not retarded. If the whole dealy can't be salvaged, nevermind returned to its former glory, it'll be a hell of a thing. You know exactly what I mean.
from cedartrees :
sweet layout. i like it. xx.
from tater-fay :
I sort of like your new layout (or lack of)..it's easy on the eyes, clean, simple, and pure..all adjectives that describe you (well, ok...I didn't mean SIMPLE...stop glaring at me!)
from kaybiff :
If you leave, kittens will die. And not in that masturbation Domo-kun poster way. No, no. We're talking sad, sad kitty deaths with no gratification at all. Unless you like that sort of thing. You weirdo.
from mister-ed :
twelve days and no entry, what am i supposed to do! me me me! everything alright?
from elgan :
Chat's back.
from elgan :
In Timothy Findlay’s “Not Wanted on the Voyage” Japeth was blue because he had been marinated in wine. And the wine turned your tongue blue (or purple, which is a kind of blue) and it all just seemed to connect in a beautiful, big picture, kind of way.
from gypped :
hehe you said weetabix again.
from mister-ed :
it seems i'd had more vodka than i thought.
from mister-ed :
well I'D EXPECT NOTHING LESS. thanks though, i mean i dno';t mean it. god i just need money in order to never go back home again ever in my life. i have forty five qyuid for the rest of my life. and by forty five i mean minus nine hundred and fifty five. and i owe two people a tenner each. and i'm sposed to be going to see qotsa in london on the 7th. just how is it going to work?!?!?
from kaybiff :
Dude. I AM A MINESWEEPER MASTER. However, it took me forever to figure out how to play Minesweeper because when I was younger I thought the numbers were points gained due to pressing the right buttons. And so OF COURSE if I saw a six, I would press one next to it because, HEY, this is the motherload. And I am totally sleepy because I didn't sleep last night. Instead I was packing up boxes and why I am telling you this is BEYOND me but you are British so it doesn't matter. Or something.
from gypped :
I went to many! well two different ones; first one was raggedy, and we never did anything, and all the girls now have babies. the other one had its very own rodeo.
from vesselland :
happy birthday. i always get the same comments then you do: "whaaaatttt... you are 23!? i thought you were 17!" "well - thanx..." grrrrrr... eat one of those spiders and enjoy your day... oh and don't fall into the ditch!
from daath :
Hope all is well on the island.
from pixiia-8 :
I just signed your guestbook, but I don't think it worked...anyway, the message said: Monkrock hahaha. Happy birthday to you too chiv! I thought at first that you meant your sister drew a vagina on the envelope flap when you said she drew a box "you know what I mean". It was funny, I thought she was clever and really dirty, but it turns out she drew a teddy bear gift box motif, so she's probably quite young, and therefore my original interpretation is kind of pervy. Love you.
from pixiia-8 :
haha, was it getting a little dry there for a while? You angel, I miss you. Soon I will have a computer again and we will interface. Play cannonball. Talk about terrifying aliens. That was all so nice. Will you ever come to Canada again Chiv? I will get you drunk...
from tater-fay :
You don't respond to my notes here or on MySpace, you don't return my calls..you don't send me flowers anymore...*sniff*...By the way..do you use the phrase "Happy as Larry"? Just Curious! xoxo
from apathee :
'ello, lieblingest. i haven't visited the d'land in ages. but i visited you. and that's all that counts. in large amounts. -a
from tater-fay :
Flapjack (is that the English term for Pancake?) in your hair? TRES CHIC!
from damodred :
What is your MSN? I never see you on or I don't have you on my list for some reason or something.
from tater-fay :
I like the idea of you following around a hopping robin. That was a really good entry..some childhood memories, you supposedly talking to inanimate objects and their responses to you (it's great when you do that..it cracks me up!) I wish you'd tell us more about Chiv at age 8, 10, 12, 15, 17, etc.
from mister-ed :
yeah screw my ability, fuck it in the rump. pummel it skywards. the one concerned with getting pissed is very healthy, very capable, yes, i like it, though it means eating takes a backseat. where's your new layout?!
from sockii :
'scuse me for bad brain. Caipirinha is great in the weekend. less so on work night. Would not be least surprised by six degress of knowing someone in Bath who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows you. [is that 6?] Don't know if anyone in Bristol would admit to knowing me. Keep regular. Metamucil only in dire circumstances.
from tater-fay :
I just noticed your new "comment" for me in on your buddies list. You LOST my mix tape? I should punch you in the face..ha ha! I could always make another one, but I'm too lazy!
from friday-bingo :
Actually, the "x" boxes make for quite an attractive layout. Harhar. (This is Comma's friend Loelle/"Prancybubbles" by the way... as to not leave you slightly confused).
from comma-abuse :
And that was a Switchcraft quote. There will either be credit where credit is due or there won't.
from kaybiff :
My left index finger hurts too, but that's because I bit the nail off. Calling it a nail now is an insult to nails. Calling it a nub is a shame to nubs. I shall call it...nothing--because there is nothing there. Right.
from delighted :
hey dejected! it's delighted. Oh ho ho ha ha heh. things are closing in. it is true sooner or later everyone sits down to a banquet of consequences and I fear appetizers are on the horizon.
from mister-ed :
developments forthcoming, sleep patterns permitting.
from delighted :
oh chiv! you're mean! you're mean to me! but you make me laugh. so i forgive you.
from slapmeharder :
1. you should shave your head (no worrisome thoughts about style and such) and 2. you have cute hair- like a hot little monk from days of olde
from comma-abuse :
Chiv, you still haven't linked me. And I am with Biffy in saying you need to stop being droopy. After all, you don't live in America. You should be skipping through the streets. Or maybe just smiling smugly and sipping tea, you know, whatever. God, the Cheeky Girls are so terrible. (Sorry, the note was utter crap)
from sls :
i hear that winters in alaska are made for those who prefer nighttime over daylight. you could be an iconoclast and get a 'winter home' in alaska! you'd just have to high-tail it out of there before summer--time of the unsetting sun.
from kaybiff :
Get better, damn it. Sad kind of bumbling Brits remind me of Hughe Grant. So unless your getting a prositute sometime soon...I don't know where I was going with that. How about some creepy get better internet hugs?
from tater-fay :
Hmmm...I KNOW I didn't imagine those two entries involving blood and the word "fuck" and a general sense of despair and hopelessness..I have never known you to delete entries...why?
from mister-ed :
i require turkey and something to drink that has more than Belgian Lager on the label.
from uberjnet :
i'll have to remember that stealing tastes like pinecones....i'd always wondered what that was, that earthy taste....seems logical.
from delighted :
it's safe now. so you can come around for tea and crumpets and wet, windy walks and whinging.
from juststay :
weetabix? weet A bix?! what a strap off of weetbix. nine out of ten scientologists agree.
from tater-fay :
Damn. My head hurts and I don't even have a hangover. The only thing I drank last night was water. This is totally unfair!! TOTALLY!
from delighted :
HI CHIV! I AM TYPING IN CAPS AND YES I AM SHOUTING. YOU SHOULD BOOT ME OUT OF HERE. CALL A BOUNCER OR SOMETHING. THIS GIRL'S OBNOXIOUS.
from mackenzie12 :
hi I was trying to talk to u on the chat room!? So... how old ru ???? Will u leave me a note my use is mackenzie12 bye
from comma-abuse :
You know who I am, yeah. You should add me on this one, too, because being listed by chiv personality always makes me feel worldly or something. Plus, I want the old links erased so I may disappear all pretty-like.
from pixiia-8 :
I meant angel...
from pixiia-8 :
haha..you angle. :)
from mister-ed :
defo newcy b, not sure about the megaphones. maybe cones.
from kaybiff :
My nail biting has become more like a habit of finding napkins. All that bleeding can get messy, you know.
from carnageus :
You'd never get away with an entry like that under socialist realism
from kaybiff :
Bjork shall be mine! ...Or something.
from westworld :
yes! but it is all being taken care of in a rather secretive way. my own fault. boy did i get a lesson in this one, hmmm? :)
from vikingmaiden :
I'm sorry about your Granddad. I know that must ring incredibly empty but anyway... had to try...
from mister-ed :
indeed you were.
from under-yuki :
That's my encoding going wonky. Fucking computer. Fucking fuck fuck fuckity fuck... well, frick sounds like you're trying, right? Frick!
from kaybiff :
After that last entry I feel I should say something like "Hey! Wait a minute, you!" You know, some sort of nationalistic rising, patriotic urge, yadda yadda. But that would mean I would have -- you know -- care. Meah.(Altered quotes about insubordination make me sweat.)
from pixiia-8 :
haha. i love you chiv. so much for serious.
from vikingmaiden :
We seem to share a love for vodka. And mothers who believe in the idea of "too much" vodka. Unfortunately, I don't always have access to the stuff. ... I enjoy your diary, you clever thing you.
from slapmeharder :
Its dark and cold outside and its costing me hard cold cash to be here writing. I hate that. The internet should be free dammit. When was the last time you paid to go into a library? Damn electricity. Damn world. DAMN FUCKING WORLD Chivvy. Damn damn damn.
from apathee :
hi, lovely. it is a stormy night, but very warm. the skies are blinking with flashes and i am feeling sad for no particular reason. it looks as if you have made many a new friend here in the notes section, and i will admit to feeling only slightly abandoned...(i am not really allowed to comment on this, because i am not sure what exactly you are feeling...) but i am sure i shall recover. the stars are pretty. i am sleepy. i love you forever. really.-a
from under-yuki :
There's this horribly mainstream emo song stuck in my head and I simply cannot.... and at your funeral! I will sing the requieeeeEEEeeeEEeem! I'd offer you my hand, it would hurt too much to watch you die! ...Oh, goddammit. Chiv, this is becoming serious. You'll have to... oh, Christ. I just spilled this bowl of hot rice something into my lap. I'm going to spend the rest of the night trying to make my thighs stop burning. Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it. I was going to say something, something like even Brad Pitt has girly lips, but I'm scared I'm going to be peeling off my own burnt skin, now. God.
from kaybiff :
Yeah, that pavement is crafty. Has a lot of resolve, too. The bastard.
from cdghost :
stumbled across your words and enjoyed reading them very much
from uberjnet :
i think that neighbours thing is the best title i've ever seen!!
from kaybiff :
Oh, you have somwehere to go--my LAP. (Yeah, that's all I have to offer: sexual innuendo. I am a shell of a human, or something.)
from kaybiff :
Anti-freeze is too sweet to be able to be mistaken for vodka. Not that I would know this first hand. I heard it on the news...on the tv...and I'll just go.
from mister-ed :
chiv chiv chiv i'll tell you about it as soon as i remember what it is, and in the meantime i'll tell you about other things that aren't it, most likely.
from under-yuki :
Oh, absolutely wonderful. You're darling, or someting like that. I... I really am bored. And I could start real-time noting or ask you if you have a messaging device. I'm leaving on a terrible trip in 4 days, did you know? Terrible trip. Do you have a messaging device?
from under-yuki :
I'm popular in note world? ...Hello. I'm painfully bored and also sober. If you could help either I'd be much obliged.
from pixiia-8 :
CHivvvyyyy! :) Sorry I disappeared that night, my time ran up on my computer. Pool was fun, we shall do it again very soon. xoxoxoxox
from under-yuki :
Pookie likes her notes. Or something like that. I'm great at hogging notes pages. Biffums is really threatening my reign over yours, I should have her disposed of. "The effects of a good hangover can be accurately reenacted by the effects of a bad virus." ...Something something. My legs are cold. Why are we out of tea?
from kaybiff :
Yes, forlorn moods are almost always hard to maintain when there is innuendo at hand. And now that I reread that, I find that it is a plethora of possibilities. Since there has already been a joke concerning certain acts, I could easily manipulate either "hard" or "hand" into some sort of continuation of my shenanigans. However, I myself am in a foul mood (fireworks woke me up—damned independence; damned irony) and the Killers are making it hard to think. (Damned bouncy music.)
from kaybiff :
(I didn't know how many times Pookie, under-yuki, noted you. She told me; but now I see...Wow.) ... (After writing the previous things in the parentheses, I have forgotten what I was about to note you about. I'm almost sure it had something to do with tingling and some sort of sexual suggestion, followed by a "Come to New Jersey--IF you get my meaning." But it's all a blur to me now. Pity. I should sleep.)
from under-yuki :
I'm thinking of running away just to feel rebellious. I might even blast some 80's power rock while I'm going. However, it would eventually turn into Air Supply, and by the time I'd reach the next town I would be sobbing and belting out "All by... my... SEEEEELF!" all over the place. If you want that sort of wreck sleeping on your floor, we'll have an amazing time. I'm very good at sustaining myself on alcohol or coffee, and not really eating at all. I think I've slept on a game console or two at least once in my life. This sounds like a person ad, doesn't it? "asl? [prod prod] omg, asl?" (I apologize.)
from under-yuki :
No, no. It wasn't aimed at anyone in particular. It was more of a situation where my friend did it and it was a pain to fill out so I put it up to see others suffer. ...Seems like I've failed, then. I'd like a drink, actually. Remind me to become your neighbor one day.
from under-yuki :
I would say something about being the queen of conflicting messages, but that would be a bit overkill I think. Yoghurt? Again. I've decided on "joghurt." It has that zing.
from under-yuki :
...And to think that was a filthy lie.
from under-yuki :
And to think that amidst all this Transformers the movie and Godspeed You! Black Emperor I completely missed the part where I fall madly in love with you.
from under-yuki :
And within the previous two notes I've come to the conclusion that nationality is bad to begin with. Fussy, fussy. All of it.
from under-yuki :
My mother once dated a suspiciously calm and collected Indian man. Supposedly he was very well endowed and pleasurable in the sack, as it were, despite his virginity and betraying his religion and all. He had an arranged marriage and now he ranches cattle.
from vesselland :
actually - nooo... i really, really like it!!
from vesselland :
i love it, love it, love it.... you write so beautiful!!
from mister-ed :
you're right chiv! i want one o' them boddies barrel-in-your-fridge things, but need someone to share it with. recommend me some bitters.
from sockii :
Happy Birthday Chiv!
from treewillow :
Happy Birthday (early), I hope you have a wonderful day.
from slapmeharder :
can we dream and have dreams together cos then I think we can kill evil things better. xxx
from kay-bear63 :
It was good to talk to you. Nice to meet someone from another country, Thanks. :) ~Kay
from mister-ed :
i do sort of need a haircut aye. the page hasn't changed that i can remember. but i can't be expected to remember every damn thing, damnmnmng.
from faery :
*poke* you didn't talk to me on aim, so PFFFT.
from towelphaser :
what the hell did I do??? it's not my fault i'm so devastatingly attractive. in every way. and smart. and well hung. and modest.
from chiv :
Oh, man.. Excuse my faraway gaze for a moment. However messed up, that actually made me feel a little better. (Delighted, if you let me hold yr hand infront of jennifer I shall buy you a pint- jennifer, if you make me make it up to you I.. like you an awful lot.)
from apathee :
i was just telling mike about how jealous i am of the time you've been spending with delighted. not only because i love her too (i love you, delighted) but bc you have not been spending it with me!!!(sulks) what shall i request of you to make this up to me??? (glares off into distance) hmph. (goes to fetch tea)
from delighted :
I sort of wish Mugabe hadn't been born, but if it wasn't him I suppose it would be someone else. Or is that just negative thinking?
from delighted :
good morning, let's go to the chippy! Is it raining? Maybe we could climb trees too.
from delighted :
We ate a monster? I can't be sure if this is even close to the truth of the matter because I am drunk. Someday we will meet and be horrified and never talk of it again? Despite that I am sure I would like that.
from pixiia-8 :
Naw, no guilt, the bolt happened before I read your note :). Its all good anyway, he's not upset or anything, I think he got as freaked as I did! And yes, I always need booze.
from delighted :
Yup! Which way's the chippy?
from pixiia-8 :
Yeah, why the fuck is everyone getting married? Ah, fuck it, I said no. Haha. I can't do it!
from slapmeharder :
OH! on the carpet (I like talking to carpet) in my friends house in the pattern there's a little man- I mean you can't just SEE him you have to look for him and then see him- and whenever I run up or down the stairs (there's another way to do it? you gotta run!) I say hello and wave. How's the saving for the plane ticket going chivstar? xxxx
from kaybiff :
I have found through insomnia that the 26th hour's crazy talk is nothing like the 58th's. I mean, by that time lamps can talk...in depth. Or they just give you really shifty looks. You know, there was a commercial that made me feel bad for a lamp. Poor thing. Just thinking about it makes me kind of misty. Well, off I go!
from delighted :
thanks for your kind invite, Monsieur Chiv,it is filed and will be acted upon when the time arises. Be fearful.
from tater-fay :
Question: How does one know if chiv is reaaally tipsy? Answer: When he can't stop laughing at the phrase "Adios Muchacho!"
from tater-fay :
you TWITCH? And what do you mean exactly by this "chest thing" (you were referring to yourself as being obsessive-compulsive in some mannerisms or another)...??
from slapmeharder :
I'm on a mission to find the best/worst unclassy name- for example Brianne. Basically two names squished into one... hmm shianne? The boy names are the best though- sept I can't friggin think of any right now. Damn. Hello there lovely. xxxx
from tater-fay :
*shudders in disgust*..Um, I've never watched more than 20 seconds of any Dr. Who episode and what I did watch was purely by accident.
from tater-fay :
"death ray" has such a nice ring to it. Would the ray be invisible or some Scooby-Doo cartoonish frenzied electrical white or red line? Hmmm....life is a cartoon.
from delighted :
Look at me leave notes for you! Chiv I am drunk and home alone. this is not a good.. sign, thing, happenstance? Why are canadian cigarette either super short or super long. There is so much excess in the world. The keyboard looks comfy, I want to rest my head on it.
from delighted :
I can't..oh no wait,, I get ID'd quite a lot too and once sourmouthed lady at the checkout pointed at a picture taken when I was SIXTEEN and said," you look much younger in real life." Am I growing young?
from delighted :
I tend to cry before the end, I'm pre-emptive. I know the end is coming so I like to get the crying over with so I am not too snotty and busy rooting around for tissues and am able to appreciate it. It looks as though I am stalking you.
from delighted :
you are a secretive boy. that line makes me think of belle and sebastian. do you always cry at endings?
from delighted :
Um that first note sounds like I am talking about excretory matters. I am not and I'm leaving now..
from delighted :
Yes! I mean only the tail of my shark was submerged so it was floating too. Perhaps it is a dietary thing?
from mister-ed :
just keeping you informed of my balls, chiv.
from giallothang :
Well... if you boast to be familiar with my words than you must admit that it is the most honest retort that I hold the most respect for. That said, be comforted in the fact that the hooks are firmly seated and my affection for you will not wane as a result of any ill-stated words you may impart.
from giallothang :
Why, pray tell, are you overthinking a comment to a brutally blunt blowhard like me? You should like, say what's on your mind and stuff. :)
from tater-fay :
In "Freuds Interpretation of Dreams" it says that to dream of Kojak means that you will soon receive some unexpected money. It also says that you should send that unexpected money to me, since...well, because I said so, damn it!
from uberjnet :
haha....thanks!! email me a topten, should you feel so inclined. i heart making lists. i'm serious about the amp though, it's a thing of beauty.
from mister-ed :
why don't they phone, chiv?! when they know i have no credit! people!
from tater-fay :
on nation states my nation is: tateronia (The Nomadic Peoples of Tateronia)...what is yours?
from quietthought :
Made out of rubber...... took it off below the knee... covered in hair.... SNAKE! SNAAAKE!!...... I'm afraid I was very, very drunk.
from apathee :
ah, you. i miss you terribly. i never did quite get your xmas present to you properly now did i...hmmm...if only i could fit into a box...methinks i'd make a fine parcel...i love yooooouuuu! xo
from tater-fay :
On a whim I joined Nation States..if you are interested in my Nation, let me know...ha ha ha. It does have the word Tater in it (of course)
from knifer :
i'm sorry luv. name=knifer. pass=xedniw there's love between us. *kiss noise*
from apathee :
leibling: i miss you ever so much tonight? where are you? out having your way with a pint, maybe? i surely hope so. me and the moon say hello.
from tater-fay :
I'm half-apologizing (and half not) for the email response I sent back to your response about the George Carlin thing...Sorry, I'm not myself at all and you pissed me off (and made me laugh at the same time)..which I think, is probably the story of your life, isn't it??
from sammy0501 :
'to rachel, with love, sammy'.
from mister-ed :
merry new face
from kaybiff :
Another eye banner craze is a banner stating almost exactly what you did. A banner [with eyes] making fun of [other] banners with eyes. I think it is a rather state of affairs when things no longer revolve around porn. Uh...I'm sleepy.
from tater-fay :
Mechy can eat my poop (ha ha) oh, and by the way...are you flexible enough to take a picture of your toes with the webcam? That would be interesting...just your big toe!
from eta-c :
what kind of woman lacks a danger mouse t-shirt? :)
from delighted :
why don't I have a danger mouse t-shirt and also I haven't had much respect for the moon since it succumbed to american imperialism without much fight, except for the different gravity, no water or breathable air thing making it hard for them to build a mcdonalds. Do we have to take our passports to the moon? Also in Zimbabwe we have a show called Ranger Mouse maybe I could get a ranger mouse t-shirt instead. There's always hope.
from msparacelsus :
gday chiv, this morning i spilt beetroot juice all over my Danger Mouse tshirt and for some reason started thinking of your diary...just thought i would share this pointless bit of info with you... -paleblue
from apathee :
that's better, m'dear. now wake up! (pets) -a
from cedartrees :
Guess what! I had a dream last night that we were exchanging wedding presents. I gave you a key-chain, with a real live lizard attached to it and that's when my alarm went off and I woke up. Heh heh. In response to your latest note, I have to say that you're the one who feels like *my* friend, too. [chiv love]
from paleblue- :
o,o,o, wtf? ahahaha...gday chivers...
from apathee :
darling, why so sad? no. make it stop. (makes it stop for you) -a
from amygonecrazy :
if you do run away from america, dont come to new zealand. for your own sake. love your diary.
from mister-ed :
can everybody hear me?
from mister-ed :
YES YES IT WAS USEFUL. WOULDA BEEN MORE USEFUL IF THERE WAS AN ASDA WITHIN BOMBING DISTANCE, BUT STILL, THANKYOU
from apathee :
was it i vs. the big "L" darling? (hopes 's not someone else). pshaw. we were the cutest thing in the whole of that place. -a
from delighted :
It's official other people suck, come to australia with me chiv, the beer's not as good but the weather's better. Yes, there are still people there but we can just shut our eyes.
from paleblue- :
no, no shes not dead just unconscious.
from cedartrees :
[love. and plenty of "you liiiiiiiike its"]
from apathee :
i've decided that i belong more around the tops of that favourites list. yes, ahem; i'm in a greedy mood. -a
from paleblue- :
the same old same old i guess, eye-ing pillows secretly myself...perfecting the art of drunken swimming, trying not to end up like virginia woolf...just super, thanks for asking.
from paleblue- :
so, chivers, hows life?
from tater-fay :
Aw, what a cute kitty! You should have gotten it to bite you on the neck and taken a pic of that!
from mister-ed :
please don't eat your pillow, it would make a lot of people terribly sad because they love and need you, i believe.
from paleblue- :
...blah blah, typed sympathy and what not...and something about being lost, chiv, I am going to fill out a missing persons report for you...and self inflicted pillowcide is very tricky also.
from tater-fay :
feel better, chiv..if you want to. Although I am not in your head and cannot say "I understand" (because I can't..I can't understand anybody's emotions or life but my own), I've been depressed ALOT too...so I hope you feel better!
from delighted :
oh chiv. If it's any consolation (which it's probably not) I think you're lovely.
from chiv :
Indeed you did and indeed you do.
from apathee :
oooh. did i draw that hippo? (tries to remember...ah!) yes. i did. was me's knees too. freezing knees. ha! to you all. my knees. my drawing. the rest of you ladies can all sod off, because i win! heh. -a
from delighted :
Look I'm in here too!
from paleblue- :
haha I forgot you were familiar with elephants...cheers for the birthday wishes.
from ambrosiah :
London is always a good thing, expensive...but good. Pants are also good, especially when your naked. Have fun, talk to you soon.
from ambrosiah :
Salutations. I must say that you have a delicious taste in music. oooh...mogwai! Just the band name makes your diary wonderful. And what's this?....wonderful writing? I'll definetly be back round these parts soon. I'm glad I found your diary. Good evenings to you chiv....(:
from starlight99 :
well, its only because I'm at work and therefore so bored out of my brain I'm even contemplating downloading msn, but my boss would notice and may suspect that means I never do actual work while I'm here. So I've no choice but to keep signing your notes to keep the boredom at bay.
from starlight99 :
witchery, pft. obviously the only explanation is we are twins with esp. whooo i know what you're thiiiiiiinking!
from starlight99 :
HEY. I just saw your succumbing to your will note. I did no such thing! I was going to turn them on anyway! pft.
from starlight99 :
your wish is my command, my notes are now ON. DONT think this makes me your beotch, ho! hey, what is mechy complaining about, I don't get ANY comment in your profile [weep]. I demand one! And it better not be 'DONT think this makes me your beotch, ho!'
from tater-fay :
My God. I completely forgot what I was gonna write here. Well, Um..Happy November (?!)
from paleblue- :
..ah, you could sleep in a pocket-watch but it really depends on how much youve had to drink.
from towelphaser :
hahahahahahahahaahah yeah, but you totally made it your own with a sweet html joke. i sent uber jnet an email a cvouple days ago that just said <moron> YOU </moron>
from mechanica :
Look, i've decided you need to change the comment about me in my profile, because you have been ANNOYING ME FOR FAR TOO LONG!!! Don't change it so something shit "Eh.. its changed, lets have a cup of tea", because i will be ANGRY ANGRY! Feeling chiv, i WANT feeling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
from apathee :
know this: it IS minnesota that does NOT exist...look! nothing there! nota thing! oooh. tea. i'm coming over, don't worry. m
from sadistboo :
Oh good you have notes,I tried to sign your gbook and it fucked over.pffft,I remember when you got this layout,and someone complained about the spiders shadow going the wrong way.Man,thats one of thoes memories that stood out for some reason in my head. I remember the dumbest things.Speaking of Spiders I love the moving one :D I'ma add you to mah Fav's. yesh yesh.
from janefury :
Hi chiv. You naughty little thing you! ;)
from cedartrees :
I wish I could laugh about the situation but maybe I will in a few weeks or something when's more...funny i guess? Anyway, I'd love to go for a drink and except we'll make that sausage roll a cigarette instead ok? :)
from apathee :
IS IT TRUE? you love more than one yank at at time? how can this be? this calls for some sort of brawl. and to think...sigh...what is this midwest affair????
from mister-ed :
to simplify things, the dentist will probably just take the prettiest side of your head as payment. i've seen it happen. i did write this in your guestbook but motherfucking twat balls it won't let me.
from rainykisses :
you're my hero christopher. <3
from mister-ed :
nobody knows chiv, i think they've done all the noting they care for in this lifetime.
from asitshouldbe :
"Thanks for the note..." blah dee blah and such. No, really, I appreciate it. I don't know if you might have read my first (of only two or three so far) entry, but I have had several diaries and this is brand new, so I hope to have more notes as time goes on. Never so many as you, though. Unless I get so lucky as to get notes from you every time you are drunk. ;) If you'd like, message me on AIM sometime: DrinkingofYou (for what it's worth, I take great pride in my lack of mysteriousness, so if I ever have reason to "just stop talking" to you, you would definitely know the reason). In a reread of all that I just wrote, I am thoroughly disappointed in the lack of humor. I mean, even if I am the only one that finds me funny and I don't even chuckle at what I've written, I better pray you are pissed when you read this.
from asitshouldbe :
I have not the energy nor the "intellegence" everyone keeps ranting about to make a memorably witty note entry right now. So I will just say the safe basics: "I like your journal" ... "I have added you to my favorites" ... etc, etc. (feel free to imagine that I emoted or used an onomatopoeia to portray my certainty that I just made as ass of myself)
from apathee :
thief! i'm coming to get it! (pounces)
from mister-ed :
update you terrible cunt!
from iranaden :
[nods back] okay, username: iran / password: acidic. --denny
from mister-ed :
enid blyton eh! cheers, there was just a big blank in my head where that name should've been. i periodically think about going back and reading them again, then decide not to because for fear they won't be as vivid as i remember. crimony.
from tater-fay :
NOW LISTEN...listen you, you drunkie...if I had a gun..it would be a squirt gun and I would spray you directly in your face and I might spray your stupid butt, too! Ha Ha...ps...much love to you, my Northerner homie..GUH!
from mister-ed :
rugh rugh! that's my other dog impression.
from uberjnet :
yeah, the monkey's my #1 write-in vote.
from tater-fay :
I hate your guestbook...stupid "Oops! You can't sign that fast." I didn't even fucking sign it! Oh, and have a lovely weekend! *smooch*
from cedartrees :
It means...being really afraid. [sips coffee and tries not to fall asleep]
from slapmeharder :
Yeah I get the money- penny? huh the going rate for chivs who look like you is atleast a coupla quid. See, I've saved some. xxx
from slapmeharder :
Hey chiv are you complimenting me? Odd I think you were. Nah I'm not smart. I'm smarter than a dumb person. But being dumb is more fun. xxx you're cute. I'd like to put a For Sale sign on you. ;)
from slapmeharder :
Mr Chiv darling I think you lost your punctuation down the bottom of a vodka glass someplace. Aww wrestling was it? You're cute. xxx
from mister-ed :
thankyou for the kind words.
from tater-fay :
I just left a long rambling note in your guestbook and it wouldn't TAKE. So now I'm not going to even say anything at all. Goodbye.
from hijinks :
hello mr chiv
from slapmeharder :
i just noticed your note- so in affect it was a .. um... whatever a note that isn't noted is. Aww. I think you're complimenting me in a round-a-bout cheeky fashion but I could be mistaken. Either way you have eyes that are so pretty you will most like have to avoid deer hunting grounds for most of your life- I was going to say adult life but then I couldn't figure out what came after 'adult'... um. Yeah I don't know what I mean either.
from kaybiff :
hmmm... yes. my computer and i have different ideas on how things should work too. crafty. yes,well. i'll be off then.
from kaybiff :
that wasn't horrible... but wait... i didn't read it... my notes are horrible. sorry... *laugh* but it's ok, i'm an american. oh... that's sad. again, terribly sorry. bye.
from kaybiff :
prehaps it was a very silly (stupid) bird... because, as you said... bats shouldn't do that... i mean, they have enhanced hearing to prevent that sort of thing... right. i'm sorry. i'll be going then.
from kaybiff :
...yes, i do cover my mouth when yawning... every time. it does not matter if i am (not) with company... just like, say... my constant (and random) outbursts... i swear... i have some sort of problem... (owls... damn them. i think they cause this. really i do. this is not an attempt at being random. i really do not like owls... they haunt me... don't look at me like that... please... er?) *cough* ...i'm sorry. i'll be leaving then. good bye.
from palindromic :
about the internet: my computer friends tell me that there's some problem with cisco. and thanks for taking my survey. i'm lindsay, to answer your question. i study science.
from slapmeharder :
Nooooo I can't make it work Chiv!! I've tried and tried and tried. I keep going *left pinkie on Ctrl, left pointer on Alt* and pressing a vowel and absolutely nothing happens. Its just like those hidden picture things isn't it? I thought they were a trick for days until I stared and stared at one. ( hmm I was at a market in London and the picture was of a wolf on a mountain top and whilst I was concentrating so hard someone stole all my money and travellers cheques- first day in London and all).... Hey can you write a diary entry where every vowel has an accent and every sentence has a word written in Enlish as opposed to American? Go on I dare you. xxxxx Now back to our regular programming.
from mister-ed :
ahh, curses, i believe i am "on" at the roadhouse. the music box is right near a mcdonald's, a kfc and a boots, for your convenience. for late night refreshments try the legendary "pharmacy pharmacy" down the road past the cinema.
from slapmeharder :
... ahh.... the never ending stoooooorieeeee aha ah aha ah aha aaah... who says you have to meet seriousness with seriousness Chiv?
from mister-ed :
ta chivms.
from slapmeharder :
Hi there *fluff... bubble* oh dear I'm so sorry.... quick the window open the window.
from tater-fay :
GOD DAMN YOUR MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKING GUESTBOOK..I had typed this BEAUTIFUL ode to what Jeffrey Dahmer's last meal request would have been (had he actually survived until death row) but it wouldn't take..*sob*....deep fried fingers and toes with a side of ranch dressing and other things along those lines...*sniff*..oh well. I love you anyway
from cedartrees :
You're the one who wanted to make a baby in exchange for a *cd player*!! you cheap ho. [weeps] *hugs anyway*
from mister-ed :
but they're my favourite hobbies!
from kaybiff :
*giggle* transformers-- robots in disguise... *slap* noooo more... please... erp... nevermind. (i swear, it's the water...)
from delighted :
Oh I'd love to come to dinner, may I bring my dear friend Stalin Mau-Mau (Zimbabwean MP for Highlands North.) He will certainly spice up the conversation and I may be able to finally corner him and ask him why exactly we have no city water?
from delighted :
thanks chiv, we're all fine and well and when I am not leaping out at my brother and screaming who are you? get out of my house! I am revelling in my newly discover upper body strength that I used to pull myself on to our roof.
from kaybiff :
(looks down... what's wrong with writing lots of notes? i like notes... mumble mumble) i don't know how much this will mean (for i am american *laugh*), but i like you... please, cheer up... (and this is the primary reason for my plans to kidnap you and scurry away... *cough*) ...eskimo?
from deianra :
Hum, you know you musn't let that kaybiff person hog all of your notes page? Thus, I shall take my share, rightly and justly (nods). Antananarivo is far, far too long. You want something short and subtle like...Lelys. Or Xyz (well, foreign languages and whatnot). But shaking fists is good, let all that rage come up and then start ranting. That's the spirit.
from kaybiff :
...i want a cup of something... tea would be nice... hot chocolate would be better... *sigh* now i'm jealous...
from kaybiff :
(looks down at previous note) mayhap i should have specified what i said sarcastically... nahhhh... *giggle and skips away*
from kaybiff :
interesting indeed... *laugh* (said in the utmost form of sarcasm)well, i guess it's better than talking about really pressing matters at hand like current events...(or like how i'm going to kidnap you... *cough*) yes, well. *giggle*
from kaybiff :
blank stare? never... but if you want eggs in this i'm afraid there's going to have to be some sort of shopping... being as i'm fresh out... *sigh* i have everything else though... (why i have french mustard and no eggs in beyond me...) erp... does this displease my future captive?
from kaybiff :
oh... i'm just one of your many american admirers... *laugh* and, yes, i do... would you like some?
from kaybiff :
these technicalities would be worked out later... being as the plan is still under construction... *cough* well... this is rather uncomfortable... er...? yes...
from kaybiff :
i certainly wouldn't shoot you... in fact, i'd probably kidnap you, tie you up, and force you to write in the confines of my home... erp... i've said too much... *giggle*
from apathee :
oooh. so glad you are leaving me notes again. i've yet to update the diaryland. but i'm sure you'll be happy to know that mike is here with me.....we aren't drunk (yet), but, you know, the night is still young. darling. i miss you more every day. love!!!!!!!!! -a
from hijinks :
It never really occurred to me they might lose *weeps*
from tater-fay :
strange news...remember that jackass supernigger? He's going to JAIL. I found out through jinxykat leaving me a note..she might have to testify...figures, doesn't it?? read my notes section for details (or her diary)
from apathee :
love yooooouuu!
from spidleriala :
Notes, eh? Interesting concept. Thankee for the music recommendation thing, and.. yes, returning to my diary... thing.. would be nice. :) Utterly pointless piece of information that sprang to mind when thinking about the traumatic work of literature that *is* Watership Down: I have written three book reviews about it during my educational, um, 'career'. Now all I need to do is work it into that distant third year dissertation somehow, and I.. have the set, or something. Yeah, notes are interesting.. when they're interesting. Heh.. *looks at floor and wanders off somewhere*
from hijinks :
I am watching a documentary about faggots, "Mr Brains just launched faggot week", "I'm a faggot lover and I'm proud" this is actually the best thing on tv :(
from hijinks :
I am watching a documentary about faggots, "Mr Brains just launched faggot week", "I'm a faggot lover and I'm proud" this is actually the best thing on tv :(
from cedartrees :
Love, love, love, love, love. love, love, love, love, love. love, love, love, love, love. love, love, love, love, love. love, love, love, love, love. All you need is.
from hijinks :
nooooo insults, just the love
from tater-fay :
Update, you pasty bastard! (Oh, I forgot to say "please")
from mister-ed :
i will defeat you
from muffpuppet :
Better short than French, chiv
from hijinks :
i keep trying to email you but this stoopid yankee (well this is the deep south so perhaps not) computer wont let me anyhoo you know what i want to say xxxxxx
from mister-ed :
'snot the milkman, just the ilkman.
from apathee :
shit.....well i missed you bunches. and if that's not enough, well i don't know what is. i mean, i AM #2 and everything, but still.....but i won't hold it against you if you move to london. quite right. i may just suit you very well. xo -a
from nater627 :
Listen to this clip: An Iraqi's thought on the war: http://komo1000news.com/audio/kvi_aircheck_031003.mp3
from nater627 :
This is in response to your recent response to my survey: If you could, please talk to an Iraqi who has fled their country in the last ten to twelve years. Explain to them how peace will help them and their fellow country men. Actually, I challenge you do to so. I would love for all the anti-war protestors to search out Iraqi's and find out how they feel. Those that have escaped, as you will find, have come to the same conclusion, that there is no such thing as peace with Saddam. I love how you claim the civilized world (which includes current Saddam's Iraq) would use peace in order to solve this conflict. However, it was also diplomatic approaches that failed, and lead to increased needless civilian fatalities pre- and during WWII. I again, challenge you to find an Iraqi who has fled their country, and get their opinion. You will soon see that you have not done research, or have you competely understood this problem. And, if it arises, I am avaliable for any questions. Yes, I was for the invasion as a way to finally liberate Iraq, and disarm the evil regime, however, I am also very well learned on the subject of the middle east, and the conflicts that have evolved over the last 2000 years. Please don't take this as an attack, as I do not wish to personally attack you. I do, however, wish to attack the anti-war/pro-peace opinion of this conflict (not the individuals that hold this view). Peace is an end, not the means.
from mister-ed :
i'm not sure what it was. BAAAAAAANNNG
from apathee :
?????
from mister-ed :
booom
from delighted :
hello from just over there.
from peth :
hapithoughts is right. you have a masterful and wondrous taste in music.
from sanchezcafe :
Hi i'm the owner of COZY CORNER CAFE and just started please will u come and test it? I'll give you some crackers!
from apathee :
i send travel faerie forth with thee. and much love. so much. -a
from towelphaser :
i doubt i'd go that quietly, but quite honestly, i'd be inclined to pick death over being an american.
from tater-fay :
HEY! As an American I have the ability to be quiet! You should see me in bed, reading my books and not talking for HOURS (except to babble nonsense to the cats, but I bet you do that too!) so stop generalizing about all American's being loud. Secondly, the only person I'd like "disappeared" is myself cuz I can't take much more of this anymore (meaning " Operation Liberty Shield" and all that goes with it..FUUUUUCK!) I am scared and angry and helpless and I can't decide whether I need a good cry, a drink, a good fuck or a gun (I don't mean suicide...not at all, so don't worry)..i'm FED UP! just like the rest of the world..I'm nothing special..but I'm not LOUD:)
from apathee :
i am #1. yes. heh.
from delighted :
I am in London we can pretend we met and went somewhere silly like the london eye which isn't like an eye at all. It will be fun. I think I can get discounts on our tickets because we are working for the revolution.
from apathee :
any number of lovely things to the gelert...xo
from mister-ed :
i am making a t-shirt with a picture of a t-shirt with a picture of a t-shirt with a picture-of-a-t-shirt and so on, so it looks like i disappear into infinity......this can't fail.
from delighted :
I am making a shirt that says " This Is Not America." Perhaps I will add "Chiv Is Not American Either And He's Tired of Being Told What To Do." It will have to be a big shirt.
from coleybear :
thank you chivlet. *kiss noise*
from moonshine76 :
[geri love too]
from sockii :
http://chiv.diaryland.com/030224_52.html I like your views on narrow-minded USAians. So very refreshing, when I'm bombarded with political correctness -- cheers, Sockii
from cedartrees :
I really love how you write rebels, "rebles", I love the notes, the signings, the spiders and I just love you, cupcake!! awwww.
from apathee :
so. who are these new people here in the notes? ahem. i am feeling a little jealous today. maybe i'll go run it offf....it is my birthday weekend, though, so. hm. -a
from hijinks :
Mwaaaaaaaaah my little SB, come here and tell me how much you love me.`
from apathee :
well get over here and show me what they look like. get over here and make them for me then. i'm awaiting!!! i've got some blueberries and honey. syrup. sugar.
from mister-ed :
so why were you jealous of the saucepan man?
from captivated- :
thanks for signing my guestbook, I appreciated your feedback.
from delighted :
I propose we add an extra couple of hours to each day, preferably between 1 am and 9am. Could you do that chiv? I'd be eternally grateful.
from towelphaser :
she goes after me with a hammer pretty much every day. she's a violent little monkey.
from delighted :
Are you wearing a sort of cardboard breast plates with a big arrow on it that says "this way to delighted's diary (you won't be sorry)"? If so, could you make me one too. It's good to see you sticking up for the continent, if only the rest of britain were too.
from apathee :
much to my dismay, there was no mail from you this evening. alas. *...can't get my head off the ground...*
from apathee :
hmmmmm....tea....yes....anddddddd.....yum. now chocolate cake. where did you go??? -a
from seedpod :
well how bout if I stay in the room too and hold him down when he tries to attack you?
from apathee :
when all else fails, there is always toast.
from hermitage :
whhhhhhhhhhhhhy were you jealous of saucepan man?
from mister-ed :
you can say that again.
from delighted :
anyway as I was saying earlier. I wasn't saying anything earlier was I? a boom chicky chick ah? That's how Mister Ed gets out of these situations. So yeah, chiv, cha cha cha kiki kan blech?
from hermitage :
DID YOU KILL THE KITTEN?
from slapmeharder :
oh dear see I KNOW I owe you photolove but my camera is sitting in my inlawishipeople's house. damn them and its theres and so I'm waiting for it to be unbareable and THEN I'm going to ask for it back. xx I'm delerious. must sleep. xxx
from mister-ed :
community service, gunpoint, what's the difference!
from mister-ed :
concurred.
from delighted :
chiv I like totally own your notes page. Ok maybe not like or totally but look last three entries and it is me me me. But now you you you and something about iraq and pre-empting a pre-emptive strike with a pre-emptive strike and how I totally agree. Not with the pre-empting of pre-emptive strike with a pre-emptive strike but with you.
from delighted :
pay-site, chiv your genius astounds me! I wonder what andrew is going to think about that.
from delighted :
Perhaps you could just almost die from swallowing a spoon? Then mister-ed would do CPR with his bagpipes and resucitate you. This would all happen on stage, and you could declare you were leaving the band for personal reasons ( see high risk work environment) so though we wouldn't be as cool we would definately sell more albums.
from tater-fay :
Well, thanks for mentioning me in a really subtle, roundabout way (You are probably scratching your head going "what the hell is she talking about now?" as you probably do every day!) Anyways, my stomach itches and I can hear somebody singing in one of the cubicles at work..they ALMOST sound like Billie Holiday and that is a good thing.
from delighted :
Chiv have you nominated beotch for the longest note in diaryland history award? You should. When can I order my tickets to doomsday? Also will you be in my band and can you play the spoons? If it is yes to both, then yay. If it is yes to the first and no to the second, then yay but learn quickly. If it is no to both I understand. But chiv, it is only an imaginary band, so maybe you can play the imaginary spoons and be in the band imaginatively?
from mister-ed :
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrAP!
from hermitage :
hiiiiiiiiii!
from apathee :
KUNG FU, i tell you! others beware.
from apathee :
well....i DID do an update, and it took me near to thirty minutes to write out; but then i re-read it and loathed it, so i just stuck with what i had. i have been a bit on the slack lately in the diary area of life...i still miss you bunches though. maybe this is incentive to update....dunno....keep the pavement a'goin. hey? do you need a reason?
from quietthought :
Some stupid fool's putting diary of an atheist on their banner as an incentive to click. Yeah, atheists are sooo hard to find. Goon. In other news you have 69 linkers, I hope the shape of that number appeals to you. BTW I hope you've got assegais ready for the 22nd, you slovenly soldier.
from hermitage :
if you go on the springer show, then i will laugh and laugh and laugh
from mister-ed :
kingsmill is alright, it's only trying to help.
from beotch :
alright so, let me ask you this. Do you think that Bush is pushing for this war to take people's minds off the tanking economy here? Part of this is reminiscent of Clinton's timely bombings around the time of "I did not have... sexual... relations with that woman"
from apathee :
ah yes. and notes, too!
from beotch :
haha, NO, not you! I meant that I wish I could be relocated somewhere where the US's decisions didn't affect me, too. This country does whatever it wants and always has (did you see The Trials of Henry Kissinger? if not you should, although it's hard to digest in one sitting) and that is so much of the reason for the shit that is going on. Believe me I know that my sentiments about the war aren't popular right now, especially (and I'm borrowing the words of apothecary.diaryland.com with whom I had a conversation about this tonight) here in Chicago, which is definitely a liberal city. I agree with almost all of what you and heckafresh say. But in a way comparing this situation with what would happen if Pakistan or India made a pre-emptive strike seems like comparing apples and oranges. This comes down to one issue: Saddam Hussein. And I guess it's basically an issue of how dire you feel it is to get rid of him. A lot of people (you, it seems) think it's premature and unnecessary to get him out of power- that there isn't enough evidence that he's a threat and that the consequences of the process are too costly. A lot of other people think there is enough evidence, me included. Hundreds of people could die. Definitely. But when I imagine a nuclear attack here, and what it could mean for us and the rest of the world, it just seems clear that something has to happen NOW. That being said, I have heard so many different points of view, and heard and read so much complete BS, that it is hard to know what to believe. One of my best friends is about as far left as you can get and he really knows his shit, and when I talk to him, I'm swayed. But then, one of my professors, who by far is the most brilliant man I've ever known (at least when it comes to politics), will make the case for why it is absolutely imperative to get him out of power... and... I just know it's what I agree with. That's what sucks, I guess, it's hard to make up your own mind when all you have to go on is propaganda and the news and what other people write and tell you. Because (you seem like a person who appreciates this) so much of what you read is complete horse shit. P.S. Did you see "Bowling for Columbine"? THAT'S something I'd like to dicuss with someone. It made me want to vomit, it was so slanted. Even though I was entertained.
from tater-fay :
oh a kittie. A kitten. A cute kitten. I think you should name it "pickles" or something like that! Also, sometimes I have to admit that when I read your diary I don't know what the fuck you are talking about!!
from hermitage :
dude, chocolate money is the goods. too bad you can't bank the fucking stuff.
from tater-fay :
well, mechy says she didn't do it, so I must have some sort of evil clone running around imitating me. The world is full of mysteries!
from mister-ed :
*looks lively*
from mechanica :
[looks blank]
from tater-fay :
I just realized when reading down in your messages that Mechy signed in as me (she was fixing my diary and had the password) and said "bitch..tee hee"..I'm gonna go twist her nipples off now. RAWR! I'd never call you a "bitch"..that isn't a cuss word I apply towards men. I'd call you a fucking fuck or something like that!
from tater-fay :
Hi! I'm chewing gum and contemplating the future. What are you doing?
from apathee :
that's right. i tried to find you in the land of IM, but you weren't there. hoping to discuss the film...so glad you saw it, sweetness....i shall find you soon, then... -a
from apathee :
i'm leaving you a note! and i'm IM-ing at the same time! wish you were here...
from mister-ed :
chiiiiv, chiiiiiiiiiv
from rainyday6 :
Just wanted to say happy new year!
from shawntasy :
huh? wait, no going to bed for you yet! hey you know what it's really not my fault I'm american, kinda. Most of my peeps where here before it was america and the other got caught up in that whole pesky slavery thing. so let me in k. now go to bed.
from shawntasy :
ummm can i join your Kill America ring even though i'm kinda american?
from delighted :
Look this is me really signing your notes and not messing with your head. Santa and Master of the Universe? How do you fit it all in Chiv?
from tater-fay :
www.inflatablechurches.com
from delighted :
I don't know why you were telling me but I liked the story anyway. Happy Happy Happy Happy Christmas Chiv! I am hoping Santa kidnaps George W. Bush and forces him to become his elf for all eternity. C'mon Santa don't let me down.
from mister-ed :
chiv-oo, chiv-oo (cha-cha-chackywicka)
from apathee :
yes, but i love you.
from apathee :
i know it's fucked up...but i'm so busy with wine tastings and galavanting across europe that i haven't the time....still thinking of how close you are....i'll write soon....hearts.. -a
from moonshine76 :
I see that you have 666 entries. That's just evil, man.
from hermitage :
ahahaha. you are friends with rock stars!
from tater-fay :
bitch! tee-hee
from mister-ed :
it truly is an inspiration! i can't wait for the feature-length bbc adaptation.
from uberjnet :
well that, and the sun's ear is made of fire.
from smellyfinger :
Uh... Bottle... uh.... telephone... uh bird feed... uh. Pickle bond time on the lawn.
from uberjnet :
if i didn't put it in, it may have stolen my password and crept in itself. bad sun!!
from xpaperdoll :
plz sir tell me a crappy joke i feed on them.
from tater-fay :
ah, too bad about Bowling for Columbine. You would have LOVED it. I did. I swear to god, I really need to move out of this ridiculous country! Do you guys have a guest bedroom? I did poorly on my god damn GRE test today. Ah, fuck it..I really don't care, actually. My cats are eating some of their "wet tuna food" at it smells NASTY *retches, wishes she had no sense of smell whatsoever!* *hugs*
from mister-ed :
just called to say i love you, and that my friend is currently negotiating the purchase of hitler thanks to your linkage.
from tater-fay :
oh and I forgot...drastic plastic..WOW! The Hitler head...he looks so TANNED. Like he's just been vacationing in Brazil!! Hmmm.....
from uberjnet :
enh, the whole "morning" thing is a conspiracy anyway. goddamn conspiracies....
from tater-fay :
my left index finger ITCHES! What could this possibly mean? Rain or a hex on me?
from tater-fay :
someone at work (just over the cubicle wall from me) is playing Madonna. I think I might have to kill her. She's been doing it several days a week. "Like a virgin....hey! touched for the very first time..." that is always the song I seem to notice the most. God help me.
from mister-ed :
slap them and take their donuts.
from tater-fay :
yea, bastards to tend stick to us colonials like flies on shit. It sucks! I'm hungry for PIE! mmmmm..pie!*hugs*
from slapmeharder :
you are my chivshine my only chivshine you make me singstrange when skies are grey you'll never know dear how much I chiv you please don't take my chivshine away! hee
from slapmeharder :
hey babe, all is good. I just wasn't sure and I benefitted the doubty etc. all is good. thank you though. you sweet...xxxxxxx
from toothbrush :
I think the boy just gradually cut down on the Coca Cola. He probably drinks one or two a day now, which still isn't that great (for the teeth, of course, but also the stomach especially) but it's better than three or four per day. I guess try substituting something else for when you usually drink Coke - something healthy like water! Or juice or milk, but water is the best. Try not to substitute something just as sugary or caffeinated as Coke though, i.e. tea would be not such a wise choice. Good luck, chiv!
from mister-ed :
"if i haven't seen it, it's new to me"
from unamerican :
it's not boring, but i've never heard of it.
from unamerican :
you! you took my survey. and now. i must know. what in the hell is a dorgie?
from tasks :
Will I ever be able to play the piano again?
from scanzilla :
You hate every ape you see, from Chimpan A to Chimpan Z?
from scanzilla :
Oh shit, you listen to good music. You need to teach the many music illiterate people around here. If I hear one more person say they like Our Lady Peace or Creed, I'm gonna get my gun..
from scanzilla :
I have a brother named Chris. Wait a second here...are you my brother!? Let me see if that birthmark shaped like Yoda is still on your ass.
from mister-ed :
good morning
from ripetomato :
...hi?
from mister-ed :
FACT: last night i was woken up by mild-but-prolonged itching and i discovered CRUMBS in my bed, and i certainly hadn't been eating anything CRUMBY. i think SABOTAGE to be the cause of your itching.
from mesmerize-me :
oops, I forgot to log out.. this is pazer-kitty
from mesmerize-me :
Thank you for giving me a much needed laugh. You're definately the boy of the hour. ;)
from apathee :
i think i was supposed to tell you of this picture dream...but then i never did...meet me in space. i'll be there.
from apathee :
welll....she does seem quite irresistable. i know you have another wife-y...so i should be able to propose to others....don't have yr heart broken...i am still the wife of tomorrow. possibly, at least. so it goes.....shall i ask yr permission next time? -a
from mister-ed :
*skulks*
from apathee :
sounds perfectly fine to me. (re: both, that is: bothering and dodgy sound quality.)
from tater-fay :
he he..I'm reading my "underground dictionary" from 1971 (written for narcs and squares basically) and I think we should start using these slang phrases again...such as "stroke the lizard" (masturbate), or perhaps "guru-you" (defin:"Parody on the expression 'screw you', which means fuck you, common use in universities" or how about: people farm (defin: "1. Modern, fast-moving large city. 2. Psychiatric institution. 3. Home for the aged.")..now I'll use those all in one sentence: "Hey chiv, guru-you! I love livin' on the people farm while you just sit there stroking the lizard."...wow! Far Out! *hugs* Stacey
from apathee :
sleeping?
from mister-ed :
the hard work has paid off! fame!
from wellaway :
hi.
from panzer-kitty :
I actually found it somewhat amusing after I figured out what you were talking about.. found the fact that I sat for a moment wondering what you could have interpreted from that entry to mean you that is.. I had completely forgotten about the profile thing so yeah I’ll stop pestering you for now.;)
from panzer-kitty :
heh.. I was confused by your note until I checked my buddy page and realized your name wasn’t there.. anyway, you’re back up now. =)
from deadeyedick :
Chiv, you are the best survey taker EVER! :)
from uberjnet :
not disrespecting....just scared of it. i also have a phobia of being to close to huge trucks, and raspberries. i fucking hate raspberries.
from tater-fay :
that was sweet..you were sad when I left you. I'm sorry. I didn't wanna leave but I was forced to. I had fun, though and we'll do it again soon..*smooch*..you really are adorably charming..don't forget that!! (hugs) Stacey
from delighted :
chiv, you know zimbabweans? I think I like you more and more each day. (yaah, so chick you layter bru, end kip will aahy.)
from uberjnet :
butter pie? sometimes your english food really, really frightens me.....at other times, entertains....
from mister-ed :
life is not porn
from apathee :
oh but it was profound. it was. you are invited. just take the aeroplane over the sea...
from apathee :
cheer up, baby.
from tater-fay :
two entries on ONE DAY! Congrats Chiv! Bravo! Keep up the good work and stop trying to put your foot behind your head! HE HE tateroni
from tater-fay :
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU..I looked at weebl and bob like you said. I LOVE them. I want to marry them. They talk about pie and shoes and they are SO CUTE. I think I'm seasick from watching them wobble:) Stacey
from hermitage :
cold is brilliant
from apathee :
yeah....i'm so lonely and sad and pathetic right now that's it's almost funny because i can sit here and laugh as tears run down my face but then it's just kind of like kindergarten and i just feel like a child instead of a full grown kid....
from pixiia-8 :
I miss you too my sweet. I know I'm not around much lately, every day is just so fucking bursting at the seems with things to do-ness. Sigh. I will write an entry on sunday though, about my rocking week-end of indie shows and scenester fashion. Its been fun so far! :)) xoxo
from mister-ed :
mmmmmnnnnnnnh!
from tater-fay :
I love bub. I love chiv. I love corndogs. I love new haircuts and fresh dye. I love grease and fat and salt and I love orange fuzzy sweaters and dark brown tights and ass-kickin' boots and cherries and raspberries and stuff. I also love MORE FREQUENT UPDATES!
from slapmeharder :
*wispers* art galleries art galleries art galleries....... xxx
from tater-fay :
I want your blue rabbit..NOW! and your body...oh, I meant to say your...oops
from damodred :
ok it looks like every new entry in your archive does that and then the one before goes back to normal.
from damodred :
no but in the archive part it's wrong. also the font is a different size.
from damodred :
for some reason your diary says today is july 16th.
from tater-fay :
you don't update your diary quick enough for me. In fact..the fact that you tend to only write ONE diary entry per day upsets me. COME ON..get with it:)...let your stream of consciousness do the talking, the rest will follow (just look at me and what a shining example I am!) HA HA..HURRY UP! I know you don't have a life cuz you've said so many times.
from damodred :
apparently i'm sophia. interesting.
from apathee :
that's right.
from apathee :
just try. a-because i want you to, b-because i'm like odie, very easy to please, and c-because you mentioned my name in the latest entry and you know you'll get attention if you do that--so imagine what kind of attention you'll get when i receive me tape cassette in the post...
from apathee :
my state is shaped like a mitten. one would think this would help. at least. *tape* tape *tape* tape *tape* tape *tape* tape
from tater-fay :
those old bow-legged geriatric men sound really cute. I want a grandpa again. Can you pretend to be my grandpa? thanks. As far as us going to hell. We don't have far to go cuz aren't we already there? I mean, isn't hell what we live RIGHT NOW anyway? I'm having a nice day actually. I will send you a "Get out of Hell Free" card..I assume you've played monopoly in your life and get what that card refers to!! Actually chiv...you probably would NEVER go to hell. You are too Bambi-like. YOu need to work on that...that corrupted thing... good luck!
from apathee :
where's my tape!!!!!?! *sound of girl yelping as she trips over chair in way of hall*. * sound of girl dying for her furniture*
from uberjnet :
mail me one. :)
from uberjnet :
your bus station people sound kind of....frightening....
from tater-fay :
um, explain "you don't have real pies over there do you?" Define real pie? What?? HUh?? Of course we have real pie..my mom makes THE best pies on this planet. Her crust is to DIE FOR!! What are YOUR pies like, shithook? (that is a term of endearment, by the way!)
from sockii :
My thumb does not a freak make. My attitude however... =)
from uberjnet :
isn't the point of public transit so that it's some sort of a convenience? damn!!!! i've taken "express" buses that have been a half hour late. THAT'S NOT EXPRESS!!!! let's make a club. the "i hate late transit" club.
from mister-ed :
penguining will get you nowhere!
from apathee :
the fecking good thing about manchester, ahem, is that i am from there, as is ian. *sound of girl grrrr's and grumpies...*
from uberjnet :
before the whole "thing" happened, anyone and everyone was jumping on the "let's make fun of americans and their incompetent president" bandwagon....and it's been like that for years....but now everyone's getting their backs up about it because they're all stupid and didn't see that the u.s. had this coming a mile away in big red block letters 100 metres high....
from apathee :
hmmmm. what a bloody long fucking dramatic american kind of day....
from mister-ed :
i will look out for you on the local news.
from apathee :
not worried. the punctuation in my latest entry is ridiculous. it's all one word sentences. lame. heh. such a childish rant. oh well. better luck next time. why aren't you asleep? i'm going to sleepytime now. sigh.
from apathee :
hmmm. i don't know the exact exchange. i'd say forty ounces is equivalent to nearly a litre and a half? or so? i'm terrible at these kinds of things. maybe like four or five pints? and by the way...who's punctuation were you referring to, anyway?
from uberjnet :
i didn't make the squirrel smile--stupid thing couldn't hit the side of a barn--didn't hit me once. valiant efforts, though, i must commend the rabid bugger for that.
from uberjnet :
only if you sit up in a tree and start throwing acorns at me.
from uberjnet :
yes, i think you should. did you end up going to soundscapes, rotate, or penguin? or just the hmv?
from uberjnet :
erm....yyyyyyes......awww, i think you're losing your mind......it's adorable....GO MIND GO!!!! i don't know what i'm talking about.
from uberjnet :
SPEARS!!!! AAAAAAAHHHH HA HA HA!!!! that's amazing that such a game exists internet-ed-ly....i shall have a game tonight. see you there?!
from apathee :
that was me in your dream. sounds like yr going through canadianwithdrawl. and i, through colorado.
from uberjnet :
either that or i'm going to stalk you in preston. MWAH HA HA HA HA....how much does a plane ticket run? arg.
from uberjnet :
useless info is fun.
from uberjnet :
whatever. i'm not around friday night or sunday on anyway. i basically have tonight.
from uberjnet :
you're going to go, and i won't get to see you?
from morguecrawl :
Glad to hear that you're enjoying Toronto. I love this city. I've never been happier than since I've been living here.
from patw-21 :
backward and inside out, how appropriate...................................
from ripetomato :
Oops, James' computer clock is slow, and I thought I had more time to catch that bus .. looks like I have to catch it at 11 instead .. ah well .. I'll see you SOON, anyway. In the meantime, I'll just sit on the couch and chat with the dog for a bit. He's not much of a conversationalist, but he's an OK listener. Well, until he hears a noise and runs off to investigate while you're in the middle of your life story, using your lap as a push-off point to propel himself up the stairs. Damn, I think I need a dog.
from ripetomato :
Hey ... I'm just about to catch the bus home .. it's um .. 10:15 am .. yes ... I'll be there in an hour or two, assuming I don't miss the damned thing. Wheee ... I also have a present for you. *crazy msn grin*
from mister-ed :
*is damned*
from uberjnet :
so you have my number....call me if you wnat to do anything. :) MONKEY!!!!!
from uberjnet :
yo yo yo. kickin it in canada. i still want to CHILL with you before you go home, don't forget.
from mister-ed :
hoot
from uberjnet :
it's a notion i entertained briefly. but only briefly--i wouldn't actually do it.
from uberjnet :
:) don't worry, i'll get it all covered. what are you doing saturday/sunday?
from apathee :
p.s. *i can't explain, exactly what i'm doing, standing in the rain*.
from apathee :
ooooh. all this talk of all these pretty girls and i'm so squiggly. yes, i was. on saturday i was in the country of canada, the providence of ontario, the city of toronto. i was waiting just for fate or karma to make us bump into eachother on the streets. i was at *the velvet underground* for a bit. quite an er.....interesting place? hm. oh well. alas. i shall be visiting family in manchester and london come springtime...
from uberjnet :
yeah....you're a nice guy.....CALL ME OR ENGLAND GETS IT!!!
from apathee :
did you see me waving my hands about, flailing my arms for your attention? right near queen st? or maybe it was adelaide. yr cuteness was hard to not notice. can't believe you didn't hear me? i'm off to thrift.... -a
from mister-ed :
HEY!
from apathee :
quite right! that's better...
from apathee :
since the mystery that is i has been unfolded (at least a bit) i'm going to comment that you now know at least something about me. ergo: i wanna be adored in the favourites. get to it. esp if we are to be married...see you in toronto....heh.
from uberjnet :
i don't have any spare nails....i do have some wall screws, though, if that helps.
from apathee :
chiv, i love you.
from uberjnet :
oh my god....you're almost going to be here.... *bites nails in anticipation*
from ripetomato :
I can't seem to narrow it down to one or even 2 or 3 of your diary entries to put on my "favourite entries" page .. I thought it'd be clever to use your "index.html" page, or your "older.html" page, but they won't let me do that .. so um .. any suggestions as to which entry I ought to list? I must have a Chivay entry on my favourite entries page. I MUST.
from mister-ed :
all in good time.
from uberjnet :
THE 15TH IS GETTING CLOSE!!!!! BRING ON THE WHORES!!!
from mister-ed :
*duly noted*
from ringostarr :
Hullo chiv, hope you enjoy your time in our city. Since I'm not sure I'm one of the ones you'd reckon hanging out with while in our lovely city I wish you the best of social times with those you are hanging out with. They all seem like nice people (I've only met Ripey in person but hapi seems nice online). Safest of journey. Ringo
from hermitage :
I AM A FUCKING DESPOT! YAAAAAAAAAAAY!
from apathee :
see lovey? when all else fails, and boredom is yr company, you always have bloody american telly for pure entertaining enjoyment! i'll go cough up some more sarcasm for others now. soon. -a
from muffpuppet :
Ha! You watched it! Well done, chiv. "I want a refund!", "yeah? Well I want to moonwalk, but life's a shithouse!" I was in tears at the end there, where he started singing Celebration on stage. I couldn't stop laughing.
from uberjnet :
i have not yet recieved this blessed email. but i shall keep praying....and checking....
from uberjnet :
know what has more cheese? that chunk of cheese in my fridge. take that, cheesemonger. i think i sent you an incoherent email today....
from mister-ed :
chad used to bem y favourite country when i had this big book of flags, but it was eventually beaten by brazil.
from rougesupreme :
don't worry, I am a republican yankee and I hate the radical creeps that flock the internet too. There bis still hope though, not much, but still hope.... And I know where chad is. haha
from apathee :
you know, toronto is only three hours from where i live.... -a
from uberjnet :
yeah....cheapo is a great cd store....when you come here, i shall have to take you there....even more reason for you to come over.....and i will make you a pile of wonderful canadian cd's for you to enjoy and pass along.....losing....train of thought....must speak...in complete sentences.....and we did get really pitifully bad at mario kart 64 by the end of our second drink, 2 or 3 shots of voddy in exceptionally sugary koolaid. we downed it because we couldn't taste the alcohol.
from apathee :
i'm so boring lately. come around for a visit. -a
from uberjnet :
yeah....i've noticed the buddy lists have a way of deceiving people like that....hmm....i get to go home soonish....not soon enough....maybe i should transfer this impending rant to an email. yes.
from muffpuppet :
Hehe, exactly. "Yeah, yeah, we've abolished all those other events, like the long jump and relays and stuff. We're focusing more on modern sports....well, just the one actually. Riflery. Yeah". I mean, Brunei is part of the Commonwealth, and they're pretty loaded. With some joint funding between the richer nations, we could clean up. Probably sweep down from Canada, with SAS and Ghurka units harrying from the south. Take Seattle and Chicago and the like, before cutting a swathe right into Washington. It's foolproof!
from mister-ed :
,......................................londonite!
from muffpuppet :
Dude! Did you know there's 1.8 billion people in the Commonwealth? Check my site, it's all there. 32% of the world's population!
from uberjnet :
red? it's too early for me....i can't even open my eyes, let alone remember what we were talking about....
from apathee :
alas. what would you do without yr computer? i was assuming (wrongly?) that you had died and choked on peanuts bc of my current diary posting. no, eh? *doesn't make any sense either*, a
from apathee :
what?@#$% no sense of humour? sheesh. -a
from ripetomato :
Your *whiiiiine* entry is all screwed up .. seriously ... look at it .. plus my name isn't even linked. *sob*
from uberjnet :
only a hundred? damn, that's going to be tough. is it just me or does the world suck?
from mister-ed :
at the sainsbury's where i work, they have a big machine at the front that eats all your coins and spits out some paper, which i think can then be exchanged for notes at some desk somewhere. mmmmmmm.
from uberjnet :
maybe people would be more apt to listen to that ass if he could spell imbecile right....or, even more likely, still not. (did you hear about that girl in pakistan who was ordered to be gang-raped in the town centre because of an affair her brother had? that's fucking SICK. i wanted to throw up when i heard that.)
from uberjnet :
i just wrote a big long note and then erased it....oops.
from uberjnet :
hey, you're stealing my trailer!!!....i like that.
from uberjnet :
damn record industry. i feel like being curmudgeonly tonight. join me?
from uberjnet :
bloody southerners. damn southern states.
from uberjnet :
i cried (and died) a little inside when audiogalaxy went down. i did read a great article in the paper today, though. the headline: "'stop downloading free music,' pleads record industry". hi-larious. because of the running around i've done with finding new sites (a.galaxy, kazaa, imesh etc) in the past few months, i feel like a vigilante on the run from the law--the music law.
from uberjnet :
*presses done, instantly flashing to new screen, adds new message about it*
from uberjnet :
HA HA!!!! but lilmissalien lives in london (england, not ontario), and she just got broadband....i guess it's not in all areas there, much like here. my parents can't get it, because they're in a small town, but i can in tonrototottotornrnrrtnotoo.
from uberjnet :
the best part of the phone (and perhaps the only good part) is the internet that came out of them. god bless you, broadband
from mister-ed :
yellow trousers, that sneaky ne'er-do-well.
from ripetomato :
The damn cable went out ... *spits* ... that's what happened to me. And awww, I know you're a lazy bum .. *hugs*.
from uberjnet :
i definitely think you should come to canada. toronto, specifically. good idea. :)
from moonshine76 :
I came to give some wuvs for your notes. Only to see that ripe wants to KILL me! :( *runs off in tears*
from uberjnet :
you just have to be a guitar person....to me, it's beautiful....
from uberjnet :
i was jealous of saucepan man too. connie was a bit of a twit, tho.... random people are more fun than cold and calculated ones.
from muffpuppet :
http://www.all-one-word.org.uk. Bookmark it, damn you. And then reply to my note below.
from muffpuppet :
I would happily join your KillAmericaOrDie webring, but I refuse to taint my website with any form of webring links. It looks hideous enough as it is without any of that. Is there any way of being part of the ring without it showing up at all on the site? If so, I'll join.
from ripetomato :
You could've said goodnight.
from mister-ed :
hello! hi! hello!
from ripetomato :
S'up. How's my wittle Chiv Vicious doing? Oh, by the way, I'm afraid I may either have to kill Moonie, or hire someone to remove her breasts in her sleep ... just thought I'd warn you.
from muffpuppet :
Meh, nothing on your computer works. The most likely culprit isn't, as you think, every single program ever made. I'm no computer expert, but I'd be inclined to think your PC is at fault here.
from apathee :
quite right! i AM quite amusing, i must add. -a
from apathee :
yah. except that i'm worth every bit. heh. -a
from muffpuppet :
fuck you.
from apathee :
hhahahahahahhahaah. -a
from apathee :
unh. i should think i've accidentally sent it to leeds. alas. if i'd wings i'd fly it over the atlantic meself. heaps. i should think soon then? fuck. -a
from muffpuppet :
Please, please, in the name of all that is good with the world, don't add any more of those buttons. I think the bottom of Carny's diary is quite possibly the most hideous thing that mankind has ever created. No offence to him, naturally. But it looks like the evil overlords of crap web design have all got together and thought "what these gaudy, tacky graphics, created badly in Photoshop with some sickly filters and no integrity whatsoever need, is some resource-intensive animation to grind everyone's computers to a choking halt! Let's get to work, boys". I mean, you can see buttons done with style over at www.robouk.com. Or you can see them done without any style whatsoever over at Carny's diary. Whatever you do, please don't encourage it.
from apathee :
anything in the post yet? -a
from mister-ed :
only problem with winmx is that, if you're me, it crashes your computer after 7 minutes of it being open, so you have to be quick, or patient.
from muffpuppet :
Yes, but sadly the Israeli's don't tend to use their military machine half as often as the Palestinians use their suicide bombers, which really harms their case as far as the "Us? Terrorists? Don't be silly, we're acting in self-defence! Yes, for crimes committed before we were born. Yes, that's right. What? Why are you looking at me like I'm a kill-crazy arab terrorist, hell bent on bringing suffering and grief to all who oppose me? Why?!" defence. Also, download WinMX, foo'. It's the best file-sharing program by a mile. At least if you only want mp3s it is. It has no spyware and it's easy to use. www.winmx.com. Go. Now.
from morguecrawl :
I feel so appreciated...so...so LOVED, I feel the love...truely. *s* I am wretchedly horrible about the royal family *chuckles* I could have said worse things...oh yes, I have ALLL the secrets...
from morguecrawl :
Awww....pwease?
from quietthought :
Shoot you eh? For Fugazi lyrics? And don't you mean you need to update Audiogalaxy to the latest version? Guestbooks still refuses me. I'll shoot you for that though.
from morguecrawl :
read my diary
from muffpuppet :
Why do you hate the Far East so much? Why why why? At the end of the day, any gripes I have with Korea or China or anyone else over there, they're all negated by the fact that at least I don't have to share a continent with them. It's mainland Europe that I can't stand. Bunch of cheese-eating surrender monkeys.
from panzer-kitty :
heh. I fall or stumble too.. when I'm drunk and because I wear platform boots all the time.
from ille :
i like the spider
from panzer-kitty :
Thanks for filling out my survey. I think Vercingetorix (sp?) is a great choice for who you’d like to spend an hour with. I’d love to talk to him, although he wouldn’t make my top five. He’d definitely make my top ten though. ;)
from mister-ed :
neutral milk hotel! mmmmmmmm
from mister-ed :
have you ever been to vinyl exchange when in manchester chivvvvvvvvvvvvvm? it is officially the best shop the world has ever seen, and sells not only vinly, but many cd's at low-low prices.
from muffpuppet :
Haha. Fattie's not me. That makes it funny.
from muffpuppet :
Jealous? Of what? Illiteracy? Bah.
from moonshine76 :
*looks at ripe's note belo and heh's*. I haven't signed your notes either babycakes. *wuvs you up in the note*
from hermitage :
Happy 500th! Also, I wouldnt hate you, Chiv.
from mister-ed :
*doffs shoes*
from ripecam :
So ... Crystal *is* a good layout, you say? Hmm .. how would Moonie know, anyway? *raises eyebrow*
from muffpuppet :
It's, like, a 20,000 word report! Sheesh. Anyway, chiv, you can't dislike Japan's pop-ness, because that's responsible for about 70% of the world's graphic design. Speaking as someone on a graphic design uni course, I can tell you that Japan, for all their pop-ness, are shining lights in the artistic design field. I'm determined to protect their good name! Besides, you've gotta love films with names like "Bubblegum Megalopolis Police Battallion 2020AD", surely. As for Civ, hurry up and get Civilisation III, damnit. Or wait until Play The World comes out, and then get that. I'll give you a game, over the net. You be England, I'll be Japan. Everyone else can be French and Spanish! Civ III is great though. They've totally revamped the rules and stuff. It's much more resource-oriented. You have to work out where the sources of Iron, Saltpeter, Coal, Rubber, Oil, Aluminium and eventually Uranium are, and defend them. It's like being in the C17th/18th, setting up colonies on the other side of the world and establishing trade routes to get that vital, life-giving saltpeter home, in order to build musketeers and cavalry. I love it. It's so much better than the previous games. I'm playing a game at the minute, and sending in my brand spanking new Tanks against the Egyptian spearmen (SPEARMEN! the second unit you get in the entire game, for goodness sake! What were they thinking?). So hurry up and get Civ III: Play The World when it comes out. Which shouldn't be more than a couple of months.
from mister-ed :
well go on!
from muffpuppet :
Hey now, there's nothing wrong with Japan. They've had some of the most consistently well-trained troops in the entire course of history. From the militia that fought back the Mongols, through the Samurai and Shinobi of the feudal periods, right up to World War 2. They've had an impressive standard of military training, almost rivalling our own. They did remarkably well against the US, and only started to falter when the yanks resorted to committing war atrocities. Japan may not have been as significant a country back in the ancient times, but they've always struck me as a kind of 'China with conviction'. They always had more of an artistic culture than China (and indeed more than most countries did). They were perhaps slightly too religious, which can always cloud a country's judgment, but ultimately I've got a lot of respect for Japan. They're one of the most unique countries on Earth, and for that I doff my cap to them. There's a lot to like about Japan. I politely request that they be removed from the list and replaced with Fra-fucking-nce. Oh! And remind me some time to write up my theory on why America is technically still a British colony, and never gained official independence at all.
from apathee :
did you get it in the post yet? -a
from muffpuppet :
Ah, you didn't miss too much. From the look of it it's one every week. This episode was all about the English sending the first troops to the colonies and trying to negotiate everything peacefully. Then, following Washington's refusal, they showed about an hour of Howe absolutely decimating every attempt at resitance, whilst inexplicably painting him out as some kind of heartless anti-christ, despite his best efforts at peaceful resolution. They even mentioned how he repeatedly allowed rebels to escape rather than murder them, and always offered Washington a chance to settle things. Unfortunately it did all this with sinister music playing and soldiers screaming in pain in the background, as if to say that it was all some kind of trick. Stupid yank documentary. In the end it showed Washington massacring the Hessian's as they slept in Trenton, pretty much turning the tide of the entire war with one fell swoop. Obviously though, when the Americans performed a massacre, it was all okay. Pffff.
from muffpuppet :
Chiv. I hope you're watching Channel 4 right now. Hilariously American version of events surrounding the so-called "War" of Independence. Uses lots of words like "massacre", "liberty" and "evil stinking English devils". It's a very fair account, I'm sure. *sigh*
from mister-ed :
you can get them for free if you're a frequent flyer!
from mister-ed :
i neeeed somebody baby, just like YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU
from slapmeharder :
sleep at nite is bad...that's what daytime is for...for sleeping
from hermitage :
happy birthday, dude
from treedancer :
Agreed - no damn good ever came of telling anyone anything, or someone, something. bleh.
from liesinc :
Hey there, I'd just like to be clear I meant no offense to you. You seem like a decent and nice guy. Only it's a bit disconcerting to get so many messages from someone you don't know. Anyway, there's probably some band I love that you can't stand. If the Manics encourage people to read Camus then they can't be that bad I guess, I just find them a bit aaaargh, especially Mr Wire. Oh well, no offense meant.
from ripetomato :
Damnit, it's *me* you're supposed to be pining for ...
from mister-ed :
*books the notes page into a health farm*
from ripetomato :
I never said *you* were irritating, apathee ... I said the unspaced note that made the page all screwy was ... bah ... I was only trying to make chivay's notes page prettaaaay. *cries*
from apathee :
i'm thinkin' you keep the odd hours. and no! i'm still here. just not really. -a
from apathee :
ripetomato thinksi'm irritating. sigh. alas.isupposetheweddingisoff.unlesswejustdon'tinviteher.gottagoremove her from me favourites..hehhehheheheheheheheheheheheheh -a
from carnageus :
Aren't we all just a little bit Bjork?
from mister-ed :
HOLY FUCKING SHIT, YOU'RE BJORK
from coleybear :
I love how you wrote about the ewoks. I'm so obsessed with star wars right now. I think you made me day...for a little while. *smile* I fucking love you.
from ripetomato :
Ahh, you.
from carnageus :
+s
from carnageus :
A nonagon - impresive, ed
from mister-ed :
*makes shapes with eyebrows*
from carnageus :
IfIendupcreatingasimilarlyannoyingextensiontoyournotespageyoucanblamethisfriggin' spacebar
from apathee :
i'm still here, you. just on holiday. we're still having an arthurian wedding; right-o? -a
from ripetomato :
Mwuahaha. I hacked your notes page and got rid of the irritatingly non-spaced note from apathee that was making your notes page bothersome. Hope you don't mind ... I could've done far worse things ... *evil laughter*
from mister-ed :
*discovers the wide post*
*also points*
from carnageus :
points to apathee
from mister-ed :
the mafia steal your eyes nowadays?
that's just...low.
why is your notes page so wide? EH? EH?
from ripetomato :
It's not fair, you know? When you go offline like that I can't just call you and say "I'm sorry" or something .. gahhhhhh ... I HATE ONLINE LIFE .. *sobs*
from ripetomato :
*whines* ... leggo of Moon's legs.
from chiv :
the mafia.
from carnageus :
protection from what?
from bunnydetox :
You know, it's physically impossible to sneeze with your eyes open? Protection Mechanism. Does this mean you can sleep and sneeze, not having to expierience that whole body convulsing ordeal? Would you wake up? Living is easy with your eyes closed. If I made sense, talking would be much easier.
from ripetomato :
The gelert entry. It confused my feeble Canuck brain, you see.
from ripetomato :
Eh?
from ripetomato :
Gah?
from carnageus :
"The pay is terrible." tch, that was a tad unkind, surely
from mister-ed :
get me a map of everything
from mrschiv :
It's an old fashioned marriage. I make tea and live in the townhouse, while he goes about the world 'on business'. I don't know exactly what business he's in, but I think he might be involved in the import/export of Tomatoes. The pay is terrible.
from damodred :
there's a mrs. chiv???????? since when? why didn't you tell me?? what's going on? where am i?
from slapmeharder :
yeah yeah there is!! (stop chiv don't listen to her she's lying!) i wish.... maybe i should make one....when I turn into a movie producer/director etc.... but they'd get some idiot chick to play silky and it would be all over.... and Fanny who would play Fanny?
from slapmeharder :
the poles are breeding chickens killer ones to take over the world.and now you just brought yourself to their attention...be afraid...polish people eat strange food too and have no sense of decor. they're not even thinking IN the square let alone thinking their way out of it..... by the way...write something exciting in my notes they beat yours in the bordem race hands down...xxxA
from susiederkins :
Gah. I apologize for um .. that ... remind me to stop bragging about all my fan types ...
from blackcat14 :
dude, ur notes r all long and shit...anyways, cool diary, it's uh, "phun" ;p & u r close with ripe tomatoe? *worships*
from ripetomato :
Crikey. For a second there I thought I'd offended a whole bunch of people who'd listed me ... but no, it was just you, deleting me 9 times ... *sobs* ... ah well.
from heckafresh :
It is the thought that truely counts in these matters. IRregardless, the fact that you're watching means something. A real something. Thanks.
from coleybear :
once in a while I like to leave you notes just like this. Yep, that's right. Just like that.
from mister-ed :
*leaves note, smelling of roses*
from hermitage :
sober is as sober does.
from apathee :
aieeeeeee. i'm so jealous of your popularity. sigh. if only i had some wits. -a
from carnageus :
*reads ripey's note* *reads ripey's entry in his guestbook* *reads ripey's note* Pah...
from apathee :
looks like i have lots o competition in the catergorie of love. looks like the font on the page is quite zepplin-esque. maybe i lose points here. -a
from slapmeharder :
as you have already worked out i got the thing from ripetomato- thanks for stoppin by though.....I'm off to see how I rate... xxA
from slapmeharder :
sorry to interupt...hee...um, hey Chiv, you know that weird test thing you did, the one which measures everything from how extraverted to how neurotic you are...um..where did you get that from? just curious..and bored... xxx
from carnageus :
I'm going to be obtuse and say I'm not going to leave one when I clearly am. Hmm, ripey vs. the wife. Who're you siding with now, chiv? Hmm? Oh, right, it's everyone against me. Guh...
from ripetomato :
Umm .. that's a better reason than "just for the hell of it", right? Right?
from ripetomato :
I'm leaving a note because I want you.
from mrschiv :
I'm adding a note just for the hell of it. So...err...there!
from carnageus :
Hmm, there was a certain wrongness about that last note I left. It says up there 'Leaving a message for chiv' which I clearly didn't. Oooh! Thingy just came into the chippy and caught Ian and thingy in a clunch
from carnageus :
Crikey - the phone and the cat doing things at the same time? How do you manage to keep track AND keep breathing, mechypot?
from coleybear :
I fucking love you!
from mister-ed :
*waves hello*
from treedancer :
umm. job. mmm. what? ahh yea, if it's real, good luck, etc and so on and so forth. are you reading notes from corpses? i don't know. umm.
from mechanica :
Chiv you bastard, you've got too many notes, so why i am leaving you another i don't know. Oh fuck, the cat has just knocked my fucking drink over, and now the phone's ringing aaaaaaaaaaaah.
from toothbrush :
I adore mouthwash!
from coleybear :
I agree that the united states is pompous and thinks they're the shit and that war isn't the answer to anyone problems. the sept 11 incidents are only a fraction of what's been happening in other countries for centuries and just because it was america the great and wonderful nation of self-righteous assholes...they decide to take this great step in stopping terrorism. but no one will ever stop terrorism. I do not however agree that this war is uncalled for. Personally, I don't want to be taken over by crazy religious warriors and I'd rather hide behind the US than have to face them myself. but that's just because i'm a pussy and I don't like fighting. but whatever. I see your point chiv...and I agree with most of it, but if we don't get rid of the threat we'll live in fear forever. and that don't sound cool to me. I just wish we didn't have to kill so much. It's all bullshit. whatever.
from bunnydetox :
well.. *ahem* excuse me for being a bloody american! ::bucks the kicket:: ...oh wait, I never liked us either! Carry on.
from mister-ed :
yer we had to sing hymns from TWO different books no less, oh the joy.

i don't think mine was a strictly catholic school or owt, they must have just done it to fill in time. CROOOOSSS OVER THE ROAD MY FRIEND
from treedancer :
"move the village" - you have style.

I like the jelly poem muchly.
from apathee :
come on now. not really sad. just good fun. besides; one can't very well live for anything else but the diaryland, can they now? -a
from ripetomato :
hmm *checks chivay for pulse and stuff*
from treedancer :
suffolk is very pretty. must be the lack of flags i guess? so yay. revolution or something. i think "we" are losing our englishness. "thai crackers with a british accent" - urgh. what is the point?! like those people who go "abroad" on "holiday" to spain and only eat chips and fried eggs and then complain... perhaps i should make this into my own diary rant.
hrm.
castles eh? pity we don't build 'em anymore ::sigh::
At least you're talking; I can stop worrying so much now ;)
from mister-ed :
RING OF BRIGHT OTTERS

wow they made us read that in school. hand-biting and poetry, ahh it's a suburban nightmare
from quietthought :
Yeah chiv, honesty works, trust me :D
from mister-ed :
i too am worried. saying exactly what you want to could be a start?

and if people get offended...well..hey you were only being honest.
from treedancer :
what are you so afraid of? if the answer to that is everything, then start by breaking it down so instead of having one large thing to worry about, you have millions of little things! **BUT** half of what we are scared shitless about, doesn't actually happen anyways, so it's a waste of time worrying about what ifs and maybes, see? Everyone worries about stuff; most people feel like they are imploding; but in reality, not everyone actually does it.

ok: so you use you diary to vent, and probably don't want or need psychology 101 - but if you do, then talk to someone about what's going on with you, someone in real life.

What are you afraid of saying? It's only words, right...? You might find if you actually voiced stuff, it wouldn't be half so bad as you think? Being a prisoner inside your own head is no fun. :-/

If this note offends you, then by all means zap it; but, I'm worried aboutcha, for what that's worth and it may not be much. ::shrug::

Talk to someone. Please?
from treedancer :
hrmm. so. an e-cuppa tea and hug probably wouldn't make you feel better then? that is to say, an electronic cuppa tea, not a drug laced one. just for clarification ;)
from mister-ed :
*posts twice in a row on notes page*
from mister-ed :
my mum would give me shit with sugar on and pretend it was tuna butties.

could i have a drumroll for that joke?
from yoshi-c :
My mum used to say that sometimes when I asked her about my dinner.
from treedancer :
bah! who said I had lost, eh? ;)
from coleybear :
hey chiv. thanks for leaving me that note. I was wondering if you actually ever came to visit me or you just linked to my diary for show ;) I haven't left a note in a while. I haven't really read in a while. but that's okay, cuz now I have lots to catch up on and it gives me something to do while I sit here and do...nothing...
from praiseandrew :
raise the praise!
from mister-ed :
widdlywiddly

from bluerainbug :
mebbe if you *did* talk about it, it wouldn't be so bad and you wouldn't feel like shit? i dunno.... :shuffles off: 09/02/02
from thebitchiam :
what will you do now? kick my but from long distance? you make me feel like rancid mayonese....
from ripetomato :
But .. but I love you MORE, damnit!
from faery :
i love you so very much.
from unemployed :
hello infamous chiv.
from sockii :

Der Eagle Arrives At Dawn.

cheers mate.
from bunnydetox :
You always make my day, you know that :) You leave me note love, I leave you note love.. man I love this system.... right, chat is down, I'm suffering through withdrawl, so.. I went and bought some nice chicken soup. This is me rambling, in case you haven't (but I'm sure you have) noticed. Lots of boogers.. and love.. The Bunny.
from carnageus :
I don't believe in these notes
from mister-ed :
you can also find hogs ont he raod, in the form of motorbikes VRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOM, NYYYYEOWWWWWMMMM, etc......
from confused1 :
I just so happen to be a southerner ;) no snow! Tis not fair :'( Xx
from bluerainbug :
hrm. mine was an e-card too, not a chain type dealie. http://www.free2greet.com

which crashed my system, so you've been warned.

bah!. bloody spammers.

02/02/02
doesn't that read for a freaky date?
from muffpuppet :
Aye, I got two a while ago. If you want to find out who it is that has a crush on you, you have to go to their site and send 'a mail' to 5 people. I was curious to see what it did, so I sent one of these mails to myself, and guess what it said!
"Someone has a crush on you! To find out who, go to our site and send a mail to 5 people".
And so on and so on, ad nauseum. Quite clever really. We're a global community of narcissists, clearly.
from bluerainbug :
yay, celebrations! makes a change, eh?thanks...
weird thing: i got one of those cards too and figured it was spam, or something nasty, seeing as my system puked each time. perhaps some kind of mass mailing bot? which is weird, 'cos I didn't think d/l had that particular addy. hrm. where's hercule poirot, eh?
from thebitchiam :
helloooooo! how are you, little one? im writing you from the beach. i wondered why i hadnt met you online these days....i miss you! i have much new stuff to talk about. wild parties, concerts and drunken experiences. stay tooned. you'll have news soon. love. cecilia <3
from mister-ed :


*tries line breaks all over the shop*

chiv, you cropped up in my dream last night: we were in a bathroom, you turned on a tap and i drank from it, when i looked up you were gone. end of dream.
*skips*
from muffpuppet :
ah Ed. Surely you know some html? There's two ways of doing it really, but I use break tags. If you put "br" in between the usual <> thingies, then it'll drop to the next line. So put two of them, and it'll miss a line, much like a new paragraph. You could actually use parapgraph tags of course, but that's far too sophisticated.

incidentally, is it just me, or did sockii just order chiv to be happy, for her sake? That's fantastic. I like that kind of unashamed honesty. "When you're sad, I'm sad.....so cheer the fuck up you little bastard, or I'll bite your knee-caps off!!". That should be said more often, I feel.
from mister-ed :
okay i've had enough i can't live this lie anymore......how do you make the little line spaces in these notes pages?
from sockii :
Dear chiv,
You endearing man. Have you any idea the concerns I have had, regarding the entries in your diary?
You seem to be progressively becoming less positive about your own future. I am becoming anxious about the future of a unique person. You.
I am not entirely content with my life. Yet I am far better off than when I first emailed you. So be happy for me. I have everything a yuppie could want (except the condominium). And it is merely the stresses of everyday life getting me down. No more, no less. It will no doubt be an enhancing experience once I have mastered the art of Working Smarter, Not Harder. When I've got the trick of it, I'll see if I will write it too.
And I will do my best to put in something good about my day, for each entry that could worry you :o)

I care for you too.
-S
from muffpuppet :
Yep! My project's first mention in a diary, I think.

Hmmm. I'm not sure how to go about this now. It would seem very shallow to just say "Talk more, you little bastards", and yet I can't think of a way to, you know, jazz it up a bit more. Hmmm.

Okay, talk more, you little bastards!

Alright alright, see my diary for details (haha, now this has turned into a plug. Fantastic). That should explain things. You don't have to talk in MY notes, specifically, you can happily talk in chiv's. I'm just trying to spark up more conversations, in general. Come on. Communicate! Talk!!

Oh, and if I don't see marked improvements in the talking...arena....then I'll be back here again (hopefully with a better sales pitch), and believe me, the less you hear from me, the happier you'll be.

Alright. So yes. Talk! Please? Go on. You know you want to. Please talk? I'll be your friend. Oh you're no fun!
from ripetomato :
The otter flies at dawn.
from trulypoetic :
your diary is kewlness...
from coleybear :
shows concern and interest so that you write some more.
from muffpuppet :
Oh sure, just steal my cobweb jokes. See if I care. Bah. I don't know why I bother.
from muffpuppet :
yes. and I touched your wife. So ultimately we're square. No? oh well. You should take more care of your diary. There are cobwebs all over the place, and creepy crawly things lying around. *tuts*
from coleybear :
you may have very little interest in some strange girl from canada who is but one in your scores of readers and admirers...but every time I read an entry, I feel as if I wrote it myself. Besides learning some valuble english slang...reading your confusion has actually somewhat helped me to understand my own. "What good does that do me?" you ask. Good point. You should move to Canada. It's relatively cheap living, not very hard to get a working visa...not hard at all to find work...if you move out to alberta that is. Calgary, Edmonton...both bustling cities...both in need of some culture. *shrug* however it ends up Chiv...you touched my life. ciao bello
from octobergirl :
i have another one for you to look at. email me :-)
from bluerainbug :
hope your meet with the counselling woman went ok; and that you're feeling better.
from ripetomato :
Consider yourself very special indeed, for yours are the only survey answers I could be arsed to read all the way through (oh dear, now you've really got me talking like you). And I'm glad I did, in spite of the rather large stain on my shirt I acquired from laughing a little too hard at your answers and spilling coffee on myself. Cheers!
from muffpuppet :
*salutes chiv*. Sing it, brother. All we do these days is give former colonies back, constantly apologising for being the once-greatest nation on Earth and introducing culture to a ton of places which probably wouldn't even exist anymore if we hadn't had high ambitions. Bah. I won't be happy until the whole map is pink, like it used to be.
from coleybear :
I think you're brilliant. Your constant wit is incredibly charming, and everything you say seems to touch me deep inside this old rusty heart. The part about your "attempted" problems...I heard that loud and clear. I feel that too. I feel a lot of what you do. I'm a chronic Chiv-reader now. Don't give up on yourself. You've got something inside you, charisma...you'll get there Chiv. :) You'll get there.
from mister-ed :
the trafford centre is evil!!! my friend called "chris" works in electronics boutique there. that's no reaosn for ii being evil of course. but..argh!
from muffpuppet :
*steals fruit*
from mister-ed :
*dances through notes page, leaving a basket of fruit as a gift*
from muffpuppet :
tries to alleviate the stagnancy of this notes page.
from bluerainbug :
*peers at the floor, shuffles feet* - thankyou muchly.
from mister-ed :
ahhh you're my hero chiv
from muffpuppet :
You're quoting me? But...but...but nobody ever quotes me. And what's all this about my comments being of "worth"? Are you feeling alright? Is somebody parading in my name when I go to bed? What's going on? Is this a repayment for the comradery nudge I gave you? I'm quite genuinely touched. Chiv my boy, you've made my day. And today being New Years Eve, it just shows your fine taste in which days to cheer people up on. I'm babbling now. Notes shouldn't be this long. This is an essay. Oh well. Thankyou again. I'll quote you soon, in order to keep this incestuous backslapping afloat. Unlike the American convoys.
from coleybear :
shibby = american wannabe slang from the movie "dude where's my car". a stand-in term for cool, or hot, or sweet, or bad ass, and shite like that. ~~still lovin ya ;)
from bluerainbug :
you might be lost on new years too, eh? s'alright, i'm lost every damn day of the week ;) *thanks* for the e.hug. appreciated. okay, okay, move along, nuthin' to see here, move along now...
from witchmedic :
... hops on in... you're step 2 on my eay to surf all through Diaryland. Just thought I'd sign in and fly on. Toodles.
from nappyhed :
hey cutethingi :) how goes it? Merry x-mas! *muahz*
from bluerainbug :
happy christmas...ummm...holidays... err, pagan rituals...whatever. just enjoy it ;)
from hermitage :
Merry Christmas
from thebitchiam :
by the way...read her stuff! melindadoll.diaryland.com p.d. I'll dump my boyfriend at any minute. don't tell me i didnt told you.
from thebitchiam :
ooh. my best friend has her diary now. that is........'pain killing' brup hurp! no matter what happens, remember you are MINE, 'kay? MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE! MINE! P.D. ¿have i told you i love you? *blinks* see you soon. <3
from melindadoll :
im brand new i like your diary. thank you very much. Been having painkiller overdose, i guess... ooouuuuhhh Can you notice when you're really awake?
from jonasty :
hey! just wanted to say what's up...i was just kinda sitting around not tired yet, so i thought i'd cruise some diaries and be a dork like that! keep smilin, keep writin! :)
from thebitchiam :
*signs here*
from ripetomato :
Er ... yes .. thanks for the not-so-kind words, I suppose? Heh. See if *i* ever confess anything on Diaryland again ... *weeps softly in a shameless attempt to evoke guilt from the cold, unfeeling Brit*
from coleybear :
I find you incredibly interesting...I read other diaries too, but yours is the only one I actually enjoy. You make me laugh, you make me think...I love your diary. Don't stop writing hey? Thanks for sharing yourself with us...it's a gift :)
from ripetomato :
Hmm .. I hope you don't think *I* said you were cute out of mere politeness .. I mean, we all know I'm as rude as they come, right? *Pounces*.
from mister-ed :
i'm setting up my notes page next to yours now, in the hope that some functional adjacency will occur and i'd get all these notebook-concubines. possibly. is the game "hitman" worth getting? hmm?
from ripetomato :
OK, if you want to nit-pick, I suppose when you say it it doesn't sound QUITE like "wankah", but perhaps ... "wankuh"? Er ... something like that. Of course, when typed either of those ways, it looks kinda bad, whereas when actually said that way by cute Brits, it sounds simply *smashing*. No, honestly, it does. One almost forgets the word is vaguely offensive. ;o)
from coleybear :
I met you once. You said very little. I was intrigued anyway. Your diary is very stream-of-consciousness...I like that. That's how all my diaries were when I was a little girl :)
from bluerainbug :
heh, nice to see you back. bacon sarnies are teh win, yay, yay! ;)
from ripetomato :
Linger on Chivay. Ahh, passivity isn't so bad ... though the relief one gets from smashing something fragile to smithereens in a fit of rage is highly underrated. Try it sometime ... just make sure you won't need it later, and that you don't do it somewhere where it may shatter in your face, leaving you to pick shards of glass from your eyelids afterward ... (*sighs* ... talk about yer learning the hard way) .. but anyway, I had a point, no? What was it I was on about? Ah, "Beats me, weren't you paying attention either?" you ask? Heh. Later.
from hermitage :
Hmmm...I think it's a lovely version of the non-stomach flu - so like a cold flu. I'm dealing with it though. Huzzah!
from bluerainbug :
hrm. do you think we should start pasting milk cartons and printing flyers?
from mister-ed :
*sings "i want you back" by the jackson five...was it?....thinks it was*
from mechanica :
Come back? Please?
from bluerainbug :
didja fall off the planet? ;)
from mister-ed :
*uses a verb but doesn't actually speak in chiv's notes page*
from mel839 :
monkeys live in ghandara
from apathee :
strange manchester girl lives in u.s. and scares chiv for kicks because she is fucking bored. i should think we'll be married someday. -a
from evil-edna :
~rushes to give Chiv a hug~
from hermitage :
I like the magnetic fields to some extent
from bunnydetox :
I cannot leave you a note. I can, however, leave you booogers. Booooogers I tell you!! Lots of love. AND BOOGERS. -detox
from rainbowkid53 :
okay chiviiiiiiccicicic...or whatever your name is...you wanna not mess with mech shes all mine....okay....you didnt wanna make moves on her so i did....thats it end of the story...okay!!! -stosh(16/f)
from evil-edna :
Damn it Chiv, don't talk about Diary Chat! I'm resisting the urge to stick my nose in....oh damn it - I'm off to stick my nose in :-)
from ripetomato :
Ah ... visiting Diaryland chat out of boredom is hardly a crime, Chivay. Don't stop! Otherwise ... I will be forced to stalk YOU. *nods*. Thanks for the note. *grins and winks*
from pleasureable :
Notes rock. (:
from evil-edna :
Chiv, Chiv, Chiv, we luv Chiv.
from mister-ed :
*spies*
from thebitchiam :
not fair!!! no no. i was just correcting the mistakes. *kicks diaryland* damn it! now everybody knows i am a bad english student. OKAY? ENOUGH? by the way, they are listening to Catatonia at a reality show in Argentina right now. and so am i. i'm sure you wanted to know that... *suicides after having shown her writting weakness*
from thebitchiam :
erm. okay. you can take a nap in my diary...... anyways, my dog is napping on the couch,¡face up! (weird bitch) you better dont sleep face up, unless you want your nose to stuff up and die asphyxiated, of course. *hand round a pillow, an aspirin and teddy*
from thebitchiam :
erm. okay. you can take a nap in my diary...... anyways, my dog is napping on the couch,¡face up! (weird bitch) you better dont sleep face up, unless you want your nose to stuff up and die, of course. *hand round a pillow, an aspirin and teddy*
from thebitchiam :
erm. okay. you can take a nap in my diary...... anyways, my dog is napping on the couch,¡face up! (weird bitch) you better dont sleep face up, unless you want your nose to stuff up an die, of course. *hand round a pillow, an aspirin and teddy*
from faery :
I love you so very much!
from astralfrog :
give me your address, and i'll send you some lovely candy and headphones. *smiles* you don't even have to worry about me stalking you, i'm far too lazy for that. being a good stalker requires that you be motivated to put on pants. feh at that.
from kittykat202 :
Do you like mashed potatoes? I do i do i dddooooooooo well they are okay and yummy with gravy on them. Havent i seen u before?
from bluerainbug :
Everyone needs "help" with something or someone, even seagulls -especially seagulls ;) Don't underestimate what people may or may not be feeling. It's not always negative. Better to say *something* than nothing at all, yes? YES. *thinks* Seagulls?! heh; memories. Where the hell is that folder?
from thebitchiam :
This is what you fucking call God!?
from thebitchiam :
This is what you fucking call God!?
from sockii :
Thanks. You are a wonderful person too. (You must be, why else am I here?)
from mister-ed :
i love you chiv! *squats*
from bluerainbug :
heh, everyone's worthy of a hand. or at least a foot, or an eye - anything you can bloody well get ;) thanks for the note.
from damodred :
i add my hugs to beatpoet's. *big squeezy hugs* you sound like the way i think alot of the time. you maybe want to see a therapist. they can help if you find the right one. (some of them are shit, you gotta shop around) in any case, take care. *more squeezy hugs*
from beatpoetgrrl :
hugs for chiv. it's going to be ok. i don't know exactly when or how, but i know that eventually it gets better. at least you've assumed control of several small countries, right?
from bluerainbug :
ugh - didn't realise the "note" was a tome - del. it if ya wish, no worries.
from wildiris :
turning to you is like falling in love when you're ten.
from tenderpoison :
Leave the note, leave the note. I suppose you didn't make this one up either, this "Leave Me Notes" business. Uh huh. I like you, dude. You've got spunk (in the funky way, not the creamy noun way. Sorry. Thought I should clarify.) So...yeah. Rawk on, yo.
from bluerainbug :
Who cares if you sound insane? What's insane anyway? If it gets the string out of your head, write whatever the hell you want, whenever you want, and how you want. Don't include vowels; or include vowels and no consonants ;) There's no point in trying to figure out what happens next, unless you write stories for a living, and even then some authors don't know the end before they've begun something. No point thinking about what ifs and maybes; think about the here and now because that is the only thing that's constant, and this is what provides....hope? *this zen-like insomniacal rambling has been been brought to you by PolarBearFleeces* wassat about insanity? :p
from evil-edna :
*trawls through depths of brain* Isn't there already a verb, chivvy or something? Oh ignore me, I've been at the Crunch Corners again.
from mister-ed :
chiv, i think you should apply to become a verb. "to chiv" i don't know what your verb would describe doing, or indeed who you should apply to for verb-status...but....like.....
from sockii :
greets chiv. "i may be a while" is a misquote (i've now realised :-/ ) of Captain Oates (him of Captain Scott's failed Antarctic expedition to reach the South Pole) famous last words: "I'm just going out. I may be some time." [ this factoid has been brought to you by http://www.co.uk.lspace.org/books/apf/small-gods.html#p236170 ]
from ann-frank :
I think you are brave to enter chat rooms. I don't have the patience for the prince speak (U R 2 cool yo!) ... best, a-f
from yoda-snoog :
Hey chiv, mind if i soil your diary wih fecal matter GG Allin style? "Agnes its me billy".......Actually Chiv i remember you calling me agnes once you little toid!!!
from sockii :
hi chiv, i believe that a child's illusion of innocence is it's own defense. speaking as an ex-child, and nominal adult. and someone who doesn't want to hear foul words coming out of a cute and innocent nephew's mouth. i think it's ok for 10+yo to express their ugliness that way, but not 9 or younger. strange, eh? coming from someone who knows that the concept of Childhood is quite Victorian. ("God save the Queen")
from mister-ed :
me? taking? place? wh...whu...wha...who....uhhh... *bobsleighs*
from apathee :
dear chiv. ahhh. someone new for me favourites list. a brit, no? i should think of something clever, however, i find myself at a loss. way to go then. -apathee
from bellanna :
arrives bearing a black sack full of the imaginary shit a certain someone left in my guestbook, *tips the contents on the floor* jumps up and down in the pringles crumbs, puts her fag out in the half drunk can of bitter, and leaves to enjoy her invisable champers - bolly darling xx
from sockii :
thank you for your appreciation, chiv. I get my best thoughts at 1 a.m. in the middle of the night during an insomnia attack, when all I have is an envelope and almost empty ballpoint pen and the streetlight outside.
from gargi :
Dammit, I mean a note. Two words...
from gargi :
Thank you for leaving anote some weeks ago. When I finally reach the full realization that I am completely nuts, you can have a job on my Grecian sheep farm. Makes life meaningful, eh? I didn't think so, either. Down a few drinks for me. Love Camus.
from mister-ed :
*signs it* you know the way there's a huge yellow space next to all this text.... well..it really distresses me.... harrumph
from carnageus :
*leaves a note...belatedly*
from mechanica :
Pleasant dreams whatever you are? Wasn't that Count Duckula? You need to get out more son. And you got ignored in diaryland chat ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Thats all. I wanted to laugh at your misfortune, adios.
from mister-ed :
*drops in*
from hermitage :
yuck. i wasnt sure if the cat had died or not from the previous entry. um. so yeah. im sorry to hear about that. go goldfish, and such.
from bluerainbug :
Thanks for the note. Sorry to hear about your cat. Sucks donkeynuts :(
from mel839 :
._.
from quietthought :
I do wish we could chat longer but... I'm having an old friend for dinner.
from quietthought :
Yeah, toast and cheese are living things.......erm....
from nata4 :
It is 5am, lack of sleep, and I was just reading some of the older stuff when I cam across 'welsh rabbit.' I was going to complain until then I read it again and it said Rarebit. Erm.. still bad!! (Turn vegetarian) :p
from mister-ed :
boo! why is everyone so abusive in the diaryland chat....i will never know...
from mister-ed :
trumpeteers
from quietthought :
Ha, this gets me out of signing your guestbook!! What's this "hiiiiiigh technology"?? Is it the Kevin Carter remix??
from neuroticah :
thanks for signing my guestbook sweet pea, I'll keep up with your diary, read some of mine and become acquanted with my twisted life. ciao sugar.
from sockii :
awww shucks. chiv, you're gonna start to censor yourself? =( let it all hang out - unless you don't want to. take care, Sockii
from hermitage :
damn this hot weather. i want more rain. send some of that bloody english rain this way.
from hermitage :
chiv + everyone loving his diary = whore :)
from nata4 :
Over 4quid for a bus?? Transport pisses me off muchly, that's why I was walking in the rain for about 2hrs in flipflops. Atleast you had townies to make it all the more interesting :)
from hermitage :
no code names for YOU!
from sockii :
nowt wrong with not sleeping. just early death due to inappropriate timing of micro sleeps (^_^) joy, huh?
from hermitage :
chivik. i think i barely missed you. this vexes me. it's not the same to be online late at night and not see a chiv. dammit. im very tired, and kinda cranky. i extra do not want to work tomorrow, and i extra do not want to work basically all this week. fawk. it is a dirty word. not that you really care to hear me complain, but there's nothing you can do about it. im going to write in your guestbook now.
from mister-ed :
OI! so eone said that peeling-labels-off-beer thing = sexual frustration to me a while ago. i looked at her and went "yeah it's cause i'm not getting any sex". i want to know where it comes from.
from hermitage :
vihc (sounds like a bad disease)...how goes fares your computer sex appeal? mwaha. yeah. "nowt" much to say. rather have a good day and such - and i will parlez-vous en dimanche. yeah. franglais. i'm a bad canadian. eat rocks.
from sockii :
I'm an 'net addict, it seems. It's 1:24:20 a.m., I have to wake in a few hours, but I can't go to sleep. I don't know what to write in my diary; I don't want to write in guestbooks; there are no fascinating new messages in alt.fan.pratchett. My day is done. Good day chiv, and to all a good night! er, day. yeah.
from quietthought :
Memo to chiv- cheddar cheese is not meant to be green and furry.
from hermitage :
amuse me or amuse jesus then. mwah. ;)
from chiv :
we are not amused. much : )
from hermitage :
istan. really. go to town tomorrow - and you can find some "fit" girls for you to use your lady-skills on. chiv the lady killer with his computer sex appeal.
from hermitage :
ivik. you really are a jealous goat. haha. i kid. oooh im tired. and i shant be on tomorrow night and maybe not saturday because of work. this is a dillema. i have signed this thrice now...hehe
from goth-killer :
Hi - you sound realy cool. I like your diary - it is top. Check out my diary - goth-killer.diaryland.com - it is ace.
from sockii :
hi
from chiv :
this is from non-chiv again. baha. bahahahaha!
from chiv :
this is from chiv : ( thank you then. someone's picked up my ; for l problem.
from chiv :
haha...this note isnt really from chiv...oh mysterious...i;; get that set up for you..right now
from chiv :
hmmm.. yes, that is all.

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