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messages to concerted:
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from zeroreverb7 :
first..you write beatifully and I cant even begin to articulate how your entries have struck a chord with me..secondly..thank you for listng my entry as a favorite..thirdly..Im sorry for your loss of Mikey...I wish for you an abundance of peace...
from passngstranj :
Didn't even know that you had a brother...
from pumpkinhouse :
Despite the loss of income, good for you!
from the29th :
man, that sucks. i know how hard you work there. i don't understand why basic respect is such an impossible thing to get.
from swirleddream :
Hi hon, I havn't been around for a while, and am sorry to hear of the the accident, I hope your ok and healing well. As for the job interview, I wish you the best of luck!!!! Rach xx
from the29th :
I'll keep my fingers crossed for you! Good luck!
from javabill :
go get checked. you may have some internal bleeding & it is just now showing on the surface. also, x-rays in the early hours after a crash may miss things due to swelling & fluid build-up. i would go get checked again if i were you just to be on the safe side.
from jrie1985 :
Thank you for the compliment. :) I checked out your rings, and you're right! We are members of many of the same diaryrings. I took a look at your pictures. I really enjoyed your tattoos and all the cute guys you know. :)
from the29th :
thanks, lady
from passngstranj :
I know, I know, days late, but I wanted to wish you a happy belated, at least. A year wiser, cooler, and happier, and may the next be better by far...
from slickasgrace :
That might be too gross even for me
from pumpkinhouse :
Hmm, you've changed the password on me. Or maybe I just forgot what it is. I forgot your new e-mail address. Mine is larmabox@hotmail.
from slickasgrace :
Dearest wet dream, I do believe that sadness engulfs me for I am locked out and cannot read the words the help define your life.
from reject-barbe :
:( @----->---
from the29th :
Ooooh, I'm Jack the Ripper! My identity is still unknown!
from pumpkinhouse :
Hi.
from passngstranj :
Still, she *was* much cooler back before the implants and going all Hollywood, right? You know, back before Kurt bid his famous farewell?
from oldvalentine :
Just thought that I would drop you a note to say that I have really benn enjoying reading your diary. lj xox
from passngstranj :
That one was pretty funny.
from swirleddream :
Have been meaning to mention to you. I read the yesterday about you sharing your books. Have you looked at www.bookcrossing.com, its a place where you can let people know that you've "released" books to the general public. Its a worldwide system.
from annivate :
hey, thanks for joining the cheep beer diary ring.
from pumpkinhouse :
Can't be funny on the spot, geez, what kind of friend are you anyway?
from swirleddream :
You see... obviously, I need a more fufilling life, out of that list, there are only THREE films that I HAVN'T seen.
from reject-barbe :
I'm so sorry. You know you can call if you need me :) @--->--
from demora00 :
Derrida also died. It is sad to think that minds that move people go too quickly.
from reject-barbe :
B-e-a-utiful layout as always. Hearts make me want candy! /melame
from slickasgrace :
love the quote, read my entry today i wrote to you, tell me all about the quote as i am a dull working man and unfamiler with it
from soakingitin :
i've read you a lot in most of your past incarnations but hadn't read your profile till now i have a poppy z. brite book hardcover though i have never seen it soft cover Exquisite Corspe, signed by her, thrilled to know that someone else's dreams were altered
from barbiewoman :
You are so sentimental- Like me...I'll share that step with you and the chilly air and dreams!
from vomit- :
your wonder woman picture is hella! haha.she rocks.
from swirleddream :
Thankyou my sweet, if you need me, you know where I am.. .xx
from passngstranj :
Hey, lady. I just had to thank you for your doughnut analogy, that really just got me to smiling. Ah, if only someone thought so fondly of me...
from the29th :
i haven't stopped playing as i had intended. i've only left this particular sandbox. though i am still watching.
from pumpkinhouse :
I'm falling deeper into love with Lucero. I think I'm ready for more...
from the29th :
what isn't fair?
from slickasgrace :
missing you far away
from reject-barbe :
*missing you!* I wanted to call but I didn't know what to say, which is a lousy excuse, but I'd rather have no excuse at all. I hope we cross paths soon! *flowers*
from govegwithme :
<3 i miss all the conversation
from pumpkinhouse :
I'm at the library and I love you. That is all.
from swirleddream :
Reading that recent entry made me realise thats it's truly amazing to have witnessed some small part of your life for over a year, to have been there watching just how much you've grown, become so much stronger, and even happier then you were. It sounds silly, but I think it's a feeling of pride even, to have been here since way back when, since Miscreant444. I truly admire you Becky, With love, Rach xx
from swirleddream :
hahaha, Im glad I'm not the only one, I was beginning to think the world was a place of fresh, white, surgical, minimilistic rooms. xx
from reject-barbe :
Will steve sing a little song everytime you get mail. (I apologize for the blue's clues reference. I don't get out as much anymore) Thank you for the note and just well.. @-----/--- yeah!
from llttleslster :
Hoorah multi-shades of red. I think that would look tight.
from swirleddream :
Hope you feel better when you wake, sweet dreams, xx
from pumpkinhouse :
I almost wrote the line "it's like no time has elapsed" (so yes, I agree) and a few other things...but I'm holding in the details for a while. Savoring them. Not the apology, but having you back in my life (in whatever capacity you'd like to be in it).
from reject-barbe :
Hope you're having a blast at work. I wish I had something more witty to say, but that alone is the only witty thing I have to say :)
from passngstranj :
thanks :)
from llttleslster :
Mountain Dew boy seriously needs to check into rehab...... cause thats just really not right at all. Really. It isn't. It just isn't.
from passngstranj :
Hey, I know how you feel. At least on this one point, that is. Is it true that misery (or would that be loneliness? isolation? whatever.) loves company?
from swirleddream :
haha, yeah, feels fantastic thanx! xx
from swirleddream :
Sounds like you have a beautiful friend in Stef. I hope you work out the static around the boy peaceably, without any pain to your heart or your self-esteem. xxx
from swirleddream :
Hey Becky, I'm in awe of your self-control over Christina and her diary. If it was me, I simply couldn't resist reading every last detail, and would then spent the rest of the next few days forcibly stopping myself from contacting her. I am truly in awe. As for Trixie, may she rest in peace, and lets hope the successor is a beautiful shiny new state of the art lap-top, that just miraculously arrives on your door-step. I promise to keep my fingers crossed for you, ;) xx
from snow666white :
you have an awesome diary! im so tired im going to go collapse now...im going to add you...promiseeeeeeeeee zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ox
from passngstranj :
Okay. I'll say again: The basis of my OPINION is that human thought and reason does not seem, TO ME, to be able to control human feelings or emotions. They can affect them, but not control them. Obviously you disagree -- but at least tell me why. Clearly, if I think I'm right, just telling me I'm wrong gets us nowhere. OTOH, I honestly don't want to fight about it -- what's the point? Feel free to just consider me a self-righteous jerk. You'd be in good company.
from passngstranj :
Hm. Well. If I say that humans bleed when you cut them, it may indeed be my opinion but it doesn't mean I made it that way. And of course we're free to disagree on any number of issues, if we weren't free will would have no meaning. Again, my point is just that it doesn't seem humans get to decide how they feel. About lovers (or potential lovers), about family, about themselves, friends ... and if you say that you have, then I suppose you have. I'm not you, after all. I was being a bit flippant about how right my opinion is -- it's not like I'm trying to pass any laws based on what I think or anything.
from passngstranj :
Well, I don't actually think it's *me* that's taking reason and responsibility out of the friend's hands -- it would be a much easier world if we could control our emotions and simply decide who to love and who not to. But it kinda seems human nature doesn't let us do that.
from vacantmemory :
assuming you finally decided to sleep......i'm just missing you this morning.....wanted to talk.....hope to hear from you soon.....
from taunya357 :
Hey I never did give you a thanks for giving me that tons of help on those two notes you gave to me. I have been so busy and never gave you a simple thanks. So here it is, your words meant a lot, I seriously am a lot more confident. And I was wondering how you got pictures in your journal. Thanks Much Love Tanya
from swirleddream :
There is a slight possibility that I'm about as girly and excited as you are about this guy. I absolutly LOVE it when things work the way you want it to. Let us know how it went on!! xx
from facetag :
The thing that gets me about Chicago at night is that creepy man who kept staring at me from the corner. I tried hiding by the Hardrock Cafe, but he found me when I left the Rainforest Cafe.
from thefictions :
thanks for the heads up
from tool-nin-fan :
Excellent playlist.
from vacantmemory :
good morning crack whore....there, does that make you feel better....i hope you're back soon, your shrewd, unruly comments are deeply missed...
from passngstranj :
i feel your pain, hon. got my first virus ever in feb, took honestly a couple months to get everything working completely normal again. good luck
from passngstranj :
hon? realistically, i'd rather have the use of my right hand right now. it's not that i was just running with being hurtful to anyone. it's that i knew it would have to come out, one way or another. sad that i don't have more self control? probably. what would you have me do?
from passngstranj :
Baby McLickypants? What in high holy hell is Baby McLickypants?
from icedana :
Sweet diary.
from passngstranj :
Now that, m'dear, is a *very* good reason to prefer handjobs. And of course, also a good reason any right-minded boy should wish to be at least decently competent at giving them ... promise to practice whenever I can. ;)
from passngstranj :
Wow. Check out the talent on Becky.
from passngstranj :
Yup, I'm realizing the same thing, as far as the self-control/willpower thing goes. If it's something I need to do, it really doesn't matter how many times I fuck it up. Because giving up and going on as before will pretty much leave me where I was before. To just keep getting back on each time you fall off the wagon may seem repetitious and even futile at first... but again, what else should we do, but at least keep *trying* for what we need/want?
from the29th :
i hope the lock is temporary
from pocket-pool :
You got me thinking. Nothing new there. Whom do I hate. No one. Is that a flaw? I love very few. Very few. I can't seem to hate. I can be disappointed, hurt, offended, and worse, but I can't hate. Except for walnuts. I hate walnuts. They taste to me like the smell of the mouse that died two days ago under the fridge. My spectrum seems to run from love to fear, hate being reserved for walnuts. xoxoxo
from the29th :
I suppose I know what you are saying but I can't believe in it. I can't believe in someone for everyone. I can't believe in eventually. I can't believe in much at all anymore. Which is not to say that I'm miserable. Which is not to say that I'm really happy. I think I've moved out of the mountains and valleys and found my way to the flat land. I can't say that I mind. I'll stick with small hills and low ditches from now on and take what I can get.
from the29th :
I worked and worked on an email to you in reply to your note. But it just kept falling apart and turning into more complaining that I was willing to be doing and I scrapped it. I know it's pretty shitty to come leave you a note telling you how I didn't send you an email but I wanted you to know that I did really think about what you wrote. And first of all: that quote is very striking and I'm glad you pointed it out because I don't check people's profile's very regularly so I'm always missing interesting things. The quote is especially meaningful to me right now because I'm currently having tremendous issues with what to say and what not to say. Not that the issues mean much since I don't actually know how to start saying what I want to say if I felt I could say it. {The perfect example for that last sentence being, in fact, that last sentence. The fact that I didn’t send that email is another good example.} Second: "quintessential greatness" is very flattering but quite terrifying. Sure, you say it's easy for me to shrug it off because I live in my head all the time, but I don't think that is really the whole story. But your opinion is held in high esteem with me and I appreciate it all the same, terrified or not. I want very good things for you and yours and I want those good things to find you soon and never lose you again. Be well.
from passngstranj :
I guess we're both all about perfect, sweetie pie ... all my note was about is that I've been playing with the idea of a new layout for a while, but like you I'm a bit of a perfectionist, and haven't had time ... YOU, on the other had, seem to come up with one every week or so. And they're all cool. So you designing one, good -- you designing one, and me not liking it but keeping it for about a year? Not good. I'm sure you can't tell it from my diary, but I'm really a wuss. The last thing I would want to do is upset someone. BTW: DRUNK WHEN I SHOULDN'T BE!!! FEEL FREE TO IGNORE TILL TOMORROW!
from passngstranj :
AND dude (dudette) I am totally tha COOLEST person to say "NO" to. For real, try it --- you'll LOVE how easy I am to counter. I'm the counter-man, really... you'll even DISAPPOINT ME if you do what I want. For real. So no sweat. Btw -- seeing pictures of you? You're crazy. Nope, not a model -- but attractive as you are physically, PLUS?!! Hon ... don't even know what to say next. 'Cept, DON'T SETTLE!!!
from passngstranj :
Hey hon ... TOTALLY UNRELATED question for you... that is, unrelated to anything you've said recentluy. Here's the gist: *If* I asked you to design a web page for me (you're obviously quite talented), 1) would you be willing to do it, and 2) if I didn't actually switch to it, how angry would you be? Because I've been thinking of a new style for a while, BUT, I REALLY like my present design... so-- thoughts, opinions?
from mestupchick :
i have that book - definitely a stellar read.
from pocket-pool :
I WANT SOME!!!!!
from mestupchick :
impressive. ooh i love dashboard, less than a month and i'll be backstage @ their toronto show. im adding you to my buddy list. feel free to retaliate...have a safe trip. <3 alana
from pocket-pool :
yeah!
from mestupchick :
your words are weighty but they make me think/smile. so thank you. peace, alana
from passngstranj :
No sweetie, I didn't think you were implying that, or implying anything actually. I wasn't trying to be sarcastic, I was quite serious ... if I had to guess which of us can speak with more authority about what guys in general enjoy, I'm guessing it would be you. And I appreciate your perspective. Again tho, despite whatever guys might have said you're not good at it, my point about the teeth was that one should be pretty confident that they know the difference between playful and excruciating before venturing there. And as you're already wise enough to realize each guy's gonna be different, my rant there could only be so useful to you. Well, and hopefully it could have been a bit amusing, as well. Btw, sorry to hear about the cancelled visit. I thought he was done, didn't realize it was just leave. Stupid military.
from passngstranj :
Aw, c'mon B -- give me a *little* credit here... I would actually have guessed that you'd be a little more wise on the subject than myself. Nah, I was talking to those *other* people. :)
from passngstranj :
Maybe he already knows you're special? You know, no surprise ending required?
from demora00 :
Love the new layout! Also, it's good to know we all do some geeky-cutsy stuff sometimes.
from passngstranj :
very cool.
from the29th :
any time, hon. i just wish i'd had more to offer you lately. i hope things are going better with you.
from the29th :
thank you? for what, dear?
from pocket-pool :
I just posted an entry for you.
from pocket-pool :
It was a relief to read what sounds like you've nearly made it out of the other side of the knothole... again. How many times have I been through the knothole? Lost track. You too, no doubt. From the look of these notes left here for you, you have commiserants. It doesn't help much (for me), but there is some comfort in knowing you're not the only one that suffers. -seth
from the29th :
The only way I've gotten through those times is by becoming little more than a passenger in my life. I'm only an observer and nothing is touching the real me that's hidden away inside, pen in hand to catalogue all the things going on outside my windows. I don't know if that helps you, but I hope so. You deserve better.
from demora00 :
IF there is one movie on the Oscar list you MUST see, it's Barbarian Invasions. I'm sure you'll get the irony - and it is a highlight of your current mood, I'm sure.
from lostboynada :
Hey, A feeling I'm all too close with. All the right parts, lined up in the right order. And still it reads like brail.(if you can read brail, then I suppose the metaphore is a crappy one)But it's something you can touch,put your hands on. Feel how real it is. And still have no fucking clue what to do with it, what it means, how it helps or fucks with your life. Nothing's worse than sinking, while you're trying to build the boat... As for me, my shit is the same. If not worse... I've never faught depression sober. It's a very fucking hard thing to do. I think i'm not going to come out on top of this one. But then, I never do... Well enough of me and my woes. Keep your head up sister. It's the only way you can see the shit comeing down. ~joe
from passngstranj :
I hear you there, sister.
from pocket-pool :
Thank you for your words today, in particular not wanting to die but not knowing how to live. Those were the words I was looking for in my own battle with depression. I get so tired of search for 'how' that sometimes I pray just simply not to wake up in the morning. When I hit nadir, all keeps me in the game is the thought of those who love me and the pain I would cause them. So I gotta keep searching to learn how to live, but for myself, not only for them. Don't forget the struggles of our hero Mrs. Parker! xoxox
from rocio717 :
I meant your ring 'freedom'=)
from rocio717 :
Hi,I really respect your diary's rules I mean NO RULES!I think you've made a good thing-your diary=) Best wishes,=)
from demora00 :
If only we could be that governing hand and pick and choose where the blows land. If only there were no "if only"'s. I believe the worst part of being in such an emotional turmoil is realizing you really are all by yourself in it. There will always be people who care about you and what you care about, but, in the end, you will be the one who deals with it as best you can and as well as circumstances allow. As such, there is no better time to take care of yourself and not let manic thinking lead you into a corner. Things'll work out as best as they can, as they always do.
from passngstranj :
You don't need a right to feel. You're supposed to care about people. It's part of being human, and having a heart. Hope things turn out as well as possible.
from the29th :
I completely see where you are coming from. My point of view doesn't take god into account because I personally don't have a stance on his existence though I do {clearly} have a need to try and explain why the hell we go through all we go through. I pretty much follow Richard Dawkins explanation of no god but I do feel a need to explain the something more that I think accounts for what I feel is the internal-something-more that I consider to be a soul. So I choose something akin to the Hindu belief in a soul that ages and learns though I'm not sure how I feel about reincarnation. If I did believe in god, I'd probably think he was a scientist {how's that for a conflicting belief?} because I think human kind would just be his jumped up version of the guinea pig.
from the29th :
Maybe its a stupid way to feel considering the fact that I have no religion in my whatsoever, but I really do think that things happen for a reason. My thinking is something like having our souls in school to become better people and we go through really horrible things and sometimes even really good things all as a part of stripping off all the unneccessary extra-ness we carry around inside of us with the goal being to find out, after everything that happens, who we really are. Like we are a present we are slowing unwrapping. I'm sure this note only serves to make me sound like an idiot and manages not one single iota of comfort but I hope I'm wrong about that last bit. If nothing else, just know that someone else is thinking about you and the people you love and is concerned for you and them. Be well, hon.
from pocket-pool :
I hoisted one to you last night, b-day girl. More than one, actually! :-)
from demora00 :
happy (almost belated) birthday! And it's so lame I can think of nothing else to say :S
from passngstranj :
Hey lady. A qick note to say Happy Birthday, and welcome to a year older and wiser... got any fun plans, or are you working tonight, too? Seems like there should be some kind of celebration...
from the29th :
Happy Birthday! {Why did I have it stuck in my head that your birthday wasn't until the 24th? Because I'm a dope I guess.}
from passngstranj :
Hey ... kinda liking the "c" titled diaries, aren't ya, B? :)
from heidiann :
Hi there! Welcome to the Kinky Sex ring. Thanks so much for joining! =)

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