DiaryLand members area

3-17 - oh yeah, i absolutely knew better than to see Pan's, altho everyone said so many great things about it and the visuals looked stunning. So - was it worth it?

from mostlydead :

I found this not available. Mine was too. I added an entry and it's available again. Hope all is well.

from papersails :

Thank you for welcoming me to the obsessive diaryring! :)

from shoelover192 :

Argh, no, you're leaving :( Good luck with everything, drop me an email whenever, [email protected]. I know your writing meant so much to you, there must be strong reasons for you to stop. Thanks for all the entries that gave me food for thought over the years.

from curiouoso :

Now's your big chance to read me then give me advice! ;) It's been interesting reading you over the years. Curiouoso*

from curiouoso :

Why do you let yourself be trashed like that? Remember I read you now and then way back when, when you were just a school girl. I figured that you would grow up and show and use the intelligence you showed thru your writing. Then you grew up more, life still isn't easy and never will be a fairy tale. It seemed you were making better choices and developing a path for your life. What's wrong? you are stuck again? Use the street smarts you developed in school, etc., and apply your innate intelligence! Do what needs to be done so you can move on to a real life with the job money and happiness you deserve! Get with it girl....your lifes awaisting! Curiouoso* with advice you didn't ask for but I would want in your situation!

from fuck--that :

YES! You are fucking awesome! I'm so beyond happy that you've finally realized it! If I wouldn't have found my soulmate, I'd drive to Buffalo and seduce you. ;-) Much love, doll! I hope this attitude lingers. I hope you're dancing!

from fuck--that :

You're beautiful! Just thought I'd let you know. Much love, doll, I'm sending you good vibrations.

from lorshad :

Its been a while since I came through here. Seems you have gone through some changes. I hope they were all for the best. i will visit again soon.

from shoelover192 :

I know what you mean about listening to your own advice. I always had such strong morals, and I knew what I would do in any given situation. But that was when I was young and life was easy. Now I'm faced with the situations I feel like I'm falling away from myself. I'm doing what I don't want to do, what I know I wouldn't have said I'd do...does that make sense? How do you feel about the abortion? Let me know when it is, I'll thinking about you.

from fuck--that :

Wow! We do have an eery amount in common. To be perfectly honest, I can hear myself screaming through a lot of your older entries! I think it's awesome that you got a job, even if it does suck right now! I hope things get better and that your boss lightens up, but half the fun in having a job is hating it. =) I bet you'd fare a lot better than you think in the country! It takes "city-folk" a while to get used to it, but there's a certain melody to life out here that you can't find anywhere else.

from shoelover192 :

*sigh* yeah, it seems all men have issues, even the ones that appear not to, or say they don't. Or maybe it's just the type of men we go for? I read your diary when I was in the process of deciding whether or not to split up with my ex, we were in a horrible dead relationship, but it was familiar and I had always thought he was The One. Now I'm with my bf, who was also an ex, and our relationship is fiery and exciting and amazing...but I can't help thinking I'm in too deep, and that he has too much of a hold over me. Anyway, I was reading you then and really identified with a lot of the things you were saying about agonizing about whether to stay with Corvier or not. I know you think you aren't coping with the split, but it was such a big relationship for you and you were together for quite a while, so don't pressure yourself. I think you're doing really well, and the most important strength isn't physical :)

from shoelover192 :

I just watched your video of Corvier and Jeremy on Myspace, it's SO surreal seeing you all...in real life? Which sounds weird. Oh and for the record, I totally support and identify with why you split up with Corvier, I think you were totally in the right. But I just want to say, OOOFT, that man is purdy. Well done lady :) Aaand don't listen to your stupid boss, as long as you know you have did enough then her blindness to what is going on around her doesn't matter. Unless she fires you. Then that'll suck lol. Hope you're doing ok :)

from fuck--that :

I don't know how to say this without sounding harsh, but I want you to know that it's coming from a deep caring (and understanding) of what you're going through: You're never going to find completion in another person, Rae. You need to be single. You say that all there is in being single is misery, but you're not seeing the big picture. It is hard to be alone, very hard, but that's what turns you into a stronger person. The lonliness drives you to do things--to get your mind off things--to move, and to grow. I'm so beyond proud of you for giving serious consideration to becoming a nutritionist! You are too fucking smart to attatch yourself to the first man that will drop the L-word. Stop settling for men without jobs, men with anger issues. Stop settling for abuse and neglect, and stop missing it when it's gone! You need to sew yourself together and get on with your life--leave these men in the past. There is a reason you broke up, and reconnecting will only bring those things to a head. Nostalgia makes it easy to look back on things fondly and with a sense of longing, but it's never as sweet as you want it. Please, pursue an education, a job--anything that will give you independance, anything that will better yourself. Men will not complete you--only the right kind of love is capable of filling in that missing peice. Please God don't miss out on the amazing things in store for you because, at such a young age, you're scared to be alone. I hope this finds you well! Even though I don't know you, and you don't know me, I love you. You're in my prayers.

from and-darling :

... I've missed so much since I've been gone... It's... Well, I actually kind of regret it because I know how I've felt about the things that happen inside of your life, as you in mine. I still promise you that one day we will meet each other face to face. I'm sorry for disappearing on you.

from and-darling :

Do you meditate, Love? I think I'm figuring things out and it's doing things to me in return. Our bodies are so involved with our souls that it's easy to forget which one should drive which sometimes, and why things happen when they do. I think that's why... I could be wrong, though.

from fuck--that :

Haha, Iowa is amazing! You just have to look at it the right way. It's all about parks, and camping grounds and star gazing. Silly things.

from fuck--that :

I hope that being with Jeremy is really what you want. I worry about you! I know it's strange, but I just hate the idea of such a beautiful flower letting herself wilt. You deserve someone who wants only you. I understand that love is blind, and deaf and dumb, but please just remember that relationships come to an end for a reason. You say you're no good at putting yourself out there and making friends, but with as much compassion as you have, I just don't see it! I just think that you're so much bigger than the life you're living. Don't be scared to spread your wings.

from takemychains :

I understand, sort of. But at the same time, you shouldn't allow him to cheat because once upon a time 4+ years ago you cheated on him and then with him and blahblahblah. This is now and you guys should be trying to do things different. He shouldn't be allowed to "have his cake and eat it too." I'm just saying; You should be filling enough. You should be all the cake he needs, regardless of how things might have went back in the day. I just want to see him appreciate you to the fullest, and in my opinion, that isn't appreciating you at all. You are way too use to abuse, and this may not be physical, but you're still allowing someone to belittle you and disrespect you.