messages to frankie123:
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from the-grey-one :
It just happened this week :/
from warpednormal :
Every once in a while I'll check this site because you are one of the few that I continue to feel drawn to. I hope you're doing okay. If u want to talk, let's do it. Love.
from the-grey-one :
Yes yes, email me at lazi_(at)hotmail.com and you shall be hooked up
from the-grey-one :
same same <3
from loveherwell :
friendly reminder you're a fucking fantastic human being.
from the-grey-one :
It's not for me to comment on anyone's relationship but, those are seriously some worrisome red flags. You do not sound paranoid, he sounds mentally unwell. Please be careful.
from the-grey-one :
I woke up thinking it was more auspicious than ominous, though definitely ran my tongue along all my teeth just the same. hahhaha. dreams. they'll getcha.
from the-grey-one :
aw :(
from the-grey-one :
huzzah!
from loveherwell :
i hope you got good news.
from the-grey-one :
giirrrlll, probably.
from the-grey-one :
Grah! I had a similar issue when I wanted to find out what they found out during my surgery and I was going to have to wait a month to do so, but I managed to convince them to move up my appointment as I was going traveling. Our health care system can be awesome and entirely frustrating. Hopeing good things for you!
from loveherwell :
well, fuck.
from darthuae :
i had the same issue with my face. there's nothing there if you're standing a little further but it felt bumpy and disgusting and i didn't like the feel of it against my hands. i got a deep cleanse facial later and started using a toner after cleansing at night. helped a lot! i feel like i still need to exfoliate more but meh... hope that helps. x
from loveherwell :
amethyst is basically all i want to be in life :) she and steven are friendship goals to the max.
from loveherwell :
weeeeee are the crystal gems! we'll always save the day! and if you think we can't, we'll always find a way! i'm obsessed.
from the-grey-one :
hugs to you, frankiegirl.<3
from darthuae :
"i just want to sleep and read and climb mountains." when i quit my job a year ago i thought i'd fall into this weird, idle stance, but no. nothing. i feel nothing towards a career that may have passed on. i find my life in sleeping, reading, and climbing mountains, too. i'm not happy but i know i can't possibly be sad.
from gonzoprophet :
fuck yes. this pleases me. lmao.
from gonzoprophet :
do it! that sounds cool and fun and if it sucks the life out of you, you'll have a bunch of money to do self-soothing shit with afterward. i know i know nothing about this and therefore have no basis for forming an actual opinion, but now at least you know how it feels when someone says to go forth & triumphantly crush it
from the-grey-one :
And also, would love to read that poem if you decide it's shareable for on the ol dland.
from the-grey-one :
Thank you :)
from the-grey-one :
Oh man! Quitting smoking is waaaay harder than a juice fast. Props to you for quitting. I'll join your ranks soon enough hopefully
from gonzoprophet :
YOU'RE GREAT. hope you get to feeling better.
from atwowaydream :
good god, girl, you know you are. Just email me at inlethaldoses@aol.com whenever you get the time and I'll send you a password. <3
from the-grey-one :
"sometimes i get so fed up with the stupidity of others that i forget that i, too, am a regular dumbass" hahahaa, oh yes. This is good. I'd get this on a shirt.
from darthuae :
*cuddles up in your brain*
from gonzoprophet :
hahaha...you're a goddamn champion. i wish for you to have the juice necessary to crush all woes.
from loveherwell :
haha, thanks :)
from the-grey-one :
So glad to hear the tank has gone back. I very much hope the rainbows and cupcakes continue!
from loveherwell :
i am glad you're feeling better. joy to you in the new year.
from loveherwell :
hope you're doing well. x
from the-grey-one :
i second gonzo's comment!
from gonzoprophet :
i lament that you've forsaken us, sweet frankie. but i understand. just be sure to let us back on in when you're ready.
from loveherwell :
pw change?
from loveherwell :
samesies basically
from the-grey-one :
i'm sorry things are so difficult right now. i hope things turn kinder soon. <3
from darthuae :
my password isn't working :(
from the-grey-one :
yeah man, prairies for life!
from loveherwell :
good luck! that's awesome.
from the-grey-one :
ahhhhthaaankyouu. <3
from atwowaydream :
I grind my teeth into dust trying to replicate that swagger in nearly all of my dreams. "Roll you like you were dice."
from degausser :
Hahahaha I also thought you were saying you got pregnant. And I was like, is laundry really her greatest concern in light of this? Like, ehh accidental pregnancy...this laundry though, FML
from loveherwell :
"i just got prego on my bedsheets" i read that and immediately thought pregnant and then it all took a much more amusing turn.
from loveherwell :
that is exactly how i feel 99% of the time. i hate myself, but i'm so much better than these other people--so, specifically, why are their lives better than mine? etc. etc. etc. forever.
from cymbals :
came back to visit dland today and would love to have your new password. note me or email korrektur.lsn@gmail.com. also, hi! xo
from loveherwell :
now that notes have been resurrected--any chance i can get the new pw?
from warpednormal :
hahah. i haven't used that email in years, its long gone now. can you send it to alex.palacol@gmail.com? Thanks love!
from degausser :
That's hilarious. I should have bitched about it sooner. Or maybe I should bitch about other things? "I'd love it if I'd win the goddamn lottery someday"? I'll let you know how that one pans out. So now what I've been wanting to ask you for AGES - can I have your new password? I scoured my email and couldn't find your email address to ask you. Bah! I'm mcdermott.c@hotmail.com
from warpednormal :
dude! any chance i can get your pw?
from loveherwell :
i want to read wolf in white van!
from loveherwell :
making a constant effort to stay in contact, being extremely open with feelings on both sides (especially of frustration), and making some sort of effort to still have a sexual connection, too (at least, this is what works for us the majority of the time).
from loveherwell :
long distance is shitty. even not seeing someone for a month is shitty. and sometimes it just makes you angrier, not fonder, because you get doubly frustrated since you can't see or touch them--which sometimes would be all you need.
from gonzoprophet :
yaaay thanks. lmao i need them.
from gonzoprophet :
can't seem to figure out what i might say that would be useful. i just really want you to be okay.
from loveherwell :
it really can work if you're both invested enough.
from loveherwell :
yes! this entry is the best. ps: you'd recommend waiting for godot? it's on my list to read but i haven't gotten around to it yet.
from degausser :
Hey thanks!
from loveherwell :
best note ever! :D
from loveherwell :
eep!! :D
from the-grey-one :
whaaat. i am from alberta. last time i tried to access pandora there it was all "not available in your country, sucker". i will have to try again when i get back. maybe things have changed..
from gonzoprophet :
lol i saw chance last week and that was probably my favorite song live. that whole acid rap album's been stuck in my head since
from atwowaydream :
Oops. . . sorry, I was typing in the wrong one. I'm a clutz.
from atwowaydream :
new password?
from gonzoprophet :
i fuckin love you lmfao
from warpednormal :
thank you, thank you. hearing this come from you is a real lift to the heart <3
from cymbals :
those seem like very honourable goals! xo
from boyecho :
we didn't record their album, they did most of that themselves (they control everything about how they're recorded and marketed. very smart). I've recorded them for various other things they've done, recorded live sets, and mixed a couple of their shows. gainesville is a small town, they've carved themselves a nice little niche there and I'm glad they're sticking around.
from loveherwell :
sometimes i read your diary and just want to give you a hug and other times i read it and recognize that you wouldn't ever even really need that. i've had some wine so y'know, take that as you will.
from loveherwell :
he is certainly someone i'm trying to keep around. and in regards to your entry: holy shit, that's awful.
from loveherwell :
blueberry wine: my favorite. congrats on the grades!
from atwowaydream :
Nah, I don't have time for that shit anymore. And I've never been one for pretty, prissy girls, anyway. Basically I got drunk and high and typed the lyrics as they were playing, however irrelevant they might have been.
from degausser :
Don't even get me started on love. I could go on literally for days about love and being totally fucking baffled by it and what it is or isn't. I could write my own confused symposium. And a sequel.
from degausser :
For what it's worth, I have always separated love and sex. Even now, four years into a relationship, ENGAGED. I still don't feel that thing that some people talk about, when love and sex combine. And I have loved men in all kinds of ways, genuinely, passionately, hopefully. I love my fiance in a way that I never thought I would love another human being, in which I'm very honest and therefore vulnerable (because if there is one thing that creates vulnerability, it is honesty). But I have never felt that thing, like, I donít know, making love? Certainly nothing to do with souls. I feel that my sex life is currently the best it has ever been, because I am consistently having orgasms multiple times a week. Heís the first guy Iíve ever been with who actually cares about that. But I donít feel some magical difference because we love each other. He wants to please the person heís having sex with, so thereís that. And weíre comfortable enough with each other to be honest about what we want/like/donít like/etc. And that is why, to me, our sex life is different than all my previous experiences. But Iíve never felt anything emotional during sex. So, you knowÖI donít know what that means. I would like to think that it isnít necessarily a sign of being broken. But, if it is, then know that you arenít alone.
from cymbals :
2/11: ummm thank you for making me look up sybarite! it is a word i definitely needed to know.
from atwowaydream :
from degausser :
No way jose! Bees are not my friend. Especially at this time of year. They're all angry and on the rampage. And maybe he wanted some of my sandwich. OR MAYBE HE WANTED TO STING MY FACE. I can't take these kind of chances.
from degausser :
Thank you!
from atwowaydream :
my next re: entry will be about sharks attacking the anal sphincter and anyone who reads your notes will think that perhaps you were responding to that.
from loveherwell :
that's exactly the best kind of conversation to have with near strangers!
from atwowaydream :
Canadian bitch with bad phone service. Or I'm just an American bitch with the same. Anyhow, I plan to get a phone this month, so perhaps eventually we will indeed text.
from loveherwell :
i'm currently $10,000 in debt (yay graduate school loans) so don't feel too bad. :P may i ask why AEIOU?
from atwowaydream :
Anything Wednesday Addams. . . yes. Maybe the one with her in front of a totem pole with a match in her hand. Very you.
from loveherwell :
i just figure we're all pretty damaged even if in different ways. so at least it's still a level playing field.
from degausser :
I am a notoriously terrible influence, my apologies! So why the decision?
from degausser :
Have casual sex! It's good for the soul.
from darthuae :
i'm the biggest talker there is (and currently blushing like mad because you mentioned me in your diary.)
from loveherwell :
YES PLEASE and we should probably coordinate snacks as well. be as much on the same level as possible.
from loveherwell :
those are the best twins!
from loveherwell :
legit the best way to spend your night. i spent it watching new girl + mindy project.
from loveherwell :
ugh, poetry theory. chuck it out the window. just read the poetry.
from darthuae :
i would feel fulfilled too. oddly. i like to stir up my internal struggles and insecurities. there's something rather poetic about feeling that your soul is on the verge of decay. i fucking love it.
from cymbals :
your list of spirit animals was amazing! i was trying to figure out what kind of portrait you could get from those characters. from this i think you must be: philosophical, non-conforming, quick-witted, old-souled, an escapist, striving to be a mythical hero but also a villain, aaand a little bit slutty? hope you take this in the spirit it was intended; i love reading your thoughts.
from darthuae :
i'm trying to teach one of my friends how to be a slut as well. she confessed to me a while ago that she's never been kissed. and now she's sending me pictures of her breasts - wild as womanly possible (things i don't understand because my chest looks like a 12 year old girl's) - and says she's been sending them to a married man who likes her. she pleaded with me to tell her "no" but i said "yes" 'cause i wanted her to be kissed.
from degausser :
Hahaha I miss going to classes drunk! I
from atwowaydream :
world = wolf. christ all mighty i'm not even drunk.
from atwowaydream :
my favorite older rendition of all of the red riding hoods would have to be the one where she sits down with the world, and they eat her grandmother together. it's very sexual, indeed.
from darthuae :
i'm so glad i'm posting too! even though, mostly, things don't come out the way you need them to. isn't that the truth? i'm also so glad that you exist here.
from atwowaydream :
I like the one about the bonnet.
from loveherwell :
it's a really depressing realization, isn't it? and it feels like that's all i've ever done. just stay with things that don't make me happy. ps. most of the time i finish reading your entries and just think about how adorable you and what you write are.
from degausser :
That is a great idea! Which I'm stealing. I definitely need a brainy sidekick to help me through this. My co-worker was thinking about signing up for the same class so we could help each other and I was like, "Uh, we're both bad at math. We're just going to sit there and tell each other the wrong answers." Oh I just had a sad thought, what if there aren't smart kids in my class because it's so basic? Gah. It's literally the minimum to graduate, I might be out of luck.
from loveherwell :
i definitely need to try that!
from degausser :
Wasps are the worst. I would have freaked. Hey, at least you entertained your friends!
from degausser :
Eleven stings?! I was feeling sad for myself because yesterday I realized I had two normal size mosquito bites on my thigh, which overnight have somehow turned into one Super Bite? It's the biggest mosquito bite I have ever seen. But eleven wasp stings? You win.
from loveherwell :
that entry, man. i feel the exact same way. "she seems happy. i work in a mall."
from degausser :
It's so freaking weird. I never thought I would be in a relationship for this long and counting. Ne-ver. It's like monogamous aliens took over my life.
from degausser :
I like reading your thoughts as well. And I don't trust anyone who thinks love and heartbreak are boring. That's been the focus of like 95% of my life.
from loveherwell :
for what it's worth, i like reading whatever it is that you leave here. and you're right, it's those mundane, everyday experiences which connect us all.
from atwowaydream :
I am mad at the world and especially mad at Vocaroo since I can't get the recording to play without the site freezing. Maybe I waited too long to check my notes, I dunno. But things need to burn.
from degausser :
I've been contemplating making a proper bucket list for years, but I worry it will make me realize everything I haven't done and send me spiraling into a pit of depression. As self reflection tends to do :P
from degausser :
Thanks! You seem pretty awesome yourself.
from degausser :
Hello! Thanks for the add. May I have your password?
from atwowaydream :
your turn, homeslice.
from loveherwell :
it's unfortunate that it's like that though. sigh.
from lifeortheatr :
thanks ... but these materialist notions of space and time are not really my concern.
from loveherwell :
i get that
from loveherwell :
it really, really is.
from atwowaydream :
when someone asks me how work was. . . there are swords and decapitation involved. totally understand your point.
from gonzoprophet :
i'm far too fond of you guys to not continue keeping up with my buddy list. and your well-wishes mean the world to me. you're a beacon of awesome
from loveherwell :
also: if you are willing to let me read, i'd like to. otherwise, sincerely: i appreciate it.
from loveherwell :
thank you. sincerely.
from atwowaydream :
moon baby is where i draw the line.
from atwowaydream :
aw. you said Sel.
from darthuae :
"i no longer listen to bob dylan like he's whispering only to me" me neither :(
from atwowaydream :
thank you, girlie. and sometimes justin timberlake is okay. i truly believe that in my heart of hearts.
from darthuae :
i missed your words so much i decided to come back here (i never really left, but i feel like hanging around for another 10 years.) thank you. x
from rhetoric :
do you exist elsewhere? two entries makes it seem as though this is not where you write.
from gonzoprophet :
I HAVE BEEN WANTING DOUGHNUTS FOR DAYS i quit, life is officially too weird to be real
from atwowaydream :
I haven't had a doughnut in quite a while, either. I mean, I don't think of them. I forget that they exist. But it's like, once I remember that I want one, any other food is uncivilized.
from atwowaydream :
happiest birthday in seven hours. Seriously, you have my love and adoration, you little young buck.
from cymbals :
i'm also glad yr notes are back! i'm drunk and on dland and everybody's entries somehow seem just right. everything will be ok. xx if all else fails, come visit me in europe.
from boyecho :
me too. and they look better on me.
from boyecho :
and your dad has impeccable taste.
from boyecho :
i'm old
from gonzoprophet :
i think this old soul had some karma to correct. so i got this oozy bleeding heart and big titted body and they threw me into georgia. with not a 'good luck' so much as a snickering, hopeful 'bash some psyches before they drive you insane.' that's the prevailing theory, anyway lmao. i can't remember your password, btw, and couldn't seem to find it in my email. strangeprophet@gmail.com would grandly appreciate a reminder
from atwowaydream :
eep! Thank you. And your notes are back on, you brat.
from gonzoprophet :
i found the book he has available for free and i like his style. he suits his name. the words all exude intense moods and precise emotional weight. i can see how somebody like that would be able to churn out something readable in such a tiny speck of time. i just don't think i could write a fiction story in such a short amount of time without leaning heavily on something else for the direction of the plot. a script or some kerouac-style expression of life, maybe. really, it's just terrifying to look up every now and then to realize that you're neck and neck in a horse race against every person ever, apparently...and just when i'd managed to contemplate taking a break. haha, whatever.

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