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lola should be the name on a box of hair color. do you know if there's a place in town i can pick all this stuff up? thanks for the info. it's super helpfull. later.

from soi-disant :

why thank you...i was so taken aback when you said "dirty voyeur" because i have said the same thing to someone before, haha...i didn.t think i could make someone feel that way....but i am glad you relate...thank you, again...and i will be reading yours, by the way...xo~rebecca.

from shabbiness :

jen darling, I cannot upload my new entry in my journal somehow, is that because all journals must be with the gold membership? darn. I wrote something for you in it, as you are one of the very few who have my journal URL.

from infrequency :

carnival of fools, will drop your jaw on any number of points. i didn't even mention the wrecking ball scene, or the... well never mind. i'm not sure where you'd ever find it. i bought it on a mad video buying sdpree while i was in wellington, ont. maybe tom's might have it. one of my new years resloutions is to figure out how to dub movies.

from orangefish :

Hallo! Thanks for the compliment on the Andy layout. I mean,your description is cool. Dang. Also,I read your profile and you have very good taste in music,and a cool layout. Thank you,have a nice day.

from ricka :

just as i was getting ready to write to you, chrysanthemum-my-computer, set on randomplay, offered up "fuck and run" for my enjoyment. it is a sign. my computer likes your computer. shhh. pass it on. shhh.

from grlscout :

"I always kind of thought the term dysfunctional family was sort of redundant" - no kidding! Your entry was really poignant today, I think the idea of "falling in love with yourself" is such a beautiful idea. I met this woman, a dancer/actress/all around miraculous woman in her 40's and I remember her telling me - once I'd told her what a doormat I always felt like - that there is nothing wrong with being kind. "Be as kind as you can to everyone from the newspaper kid, to the bum on the street to the milionaire you meet at a cocktail party. Emanate kindness from your very being and be kind to yourself. Life is short." I've always thought of that. Don't forget to bring yourself flowers!

from ricka :

how exciting to see andy warhol on the bus. last night, very late, i was very caffeinated & wondering what andy's voice sounded like. i was imagining how nice it would be to have a recording of him to wake me up in the morning, saying something incongruous like "hey little buddy, it's morning."

from manukenkun :

don't go disapearing ok?!

from snotgirl :

what great taste you have in authors and music...

from bluecinema :

glad yer back

from manukenkun :

yay! You're back! I'm so glad! Hope things are doing ok for you take care, Camilla x

from infrequency :

yeah.

from manukenkun :

Hey i'm sure you don't look at these anymore but I wanted to say i'm still missing you here ok? Send us a sign to let me know your doing alright out there, Camilla x

from infrequency :

:-< poo!

from grlscout :

Hey! Wait a minute.... There's something just wrong about all of this. Keeping an online journal is something you do for yourself - it's practically anonymous and it has nothing to do with your relationship in the real world, that's ridiculous. You seem like a really loving person and this guy gets nothing but accolaides in your journal as far as I can tell. Anyway - my point is, don't abandon it in favour of saving your relationship, I'm absolutely sure that one has nothing to do with the other (or it shouldn't, anyway). I have always kept a diary and my rule has been: if you find my diary and you read it - and there's something in there about you that you don't like - then take it with a crate of salt because it's a jounal - it's not for you, it's for me, and that's the risk you take reading it in the first place. That's just my opinion. Scout

from bluecinema :

i'm really sorry you're leaving us. please don't think that what you were doing was masturbatory or self-pitying. a lot of what you wrote was very beautiful and it made me happy to read it. the things that stay with me are the lovely images - bowie in a glitter pink bumper car, your box of memories, the girl in gazelle horns and torn nightdress, the inventory of goodbye, "the kiss we invented" - these pictures will last. i'm sorry you feel that you can no longer share, but thanks for sharing what you did. it added to my day.

from manukenkun :

i'm really going to miss you kiss off, I hurt the boy by writing my diary but we patched it up and I carry on writing and we carry on loving each other, I hope you fix it and maybe one day come back. email me maybe?

from manukenkun :

Where are you? Don't you know I miss you when you aren't around. I just read two whole Bukowski books to try and recreate that tea party feeling.

from infrequency :

it's boner w/a capital O.

from infrequency :

no i think it's just that very reason that we as bus riders are loooooosers. fact is if we had more money, none of that stuff would matter. i agree w/the argento thing. never drunk or stoned. i love the amazingly contrived ways that people sometimes die. goblin makes suspiria feel literaly claustrophobic. you actually know where there is a 24 hour tim hortens? all the ones i know about (all 2 of them) shut down at 8 or midnight.

from grlscout :

Screwey. I hope all is well and you're back on the journal wagon again soon (I'm suffering from kissoff withdrawl here, cough, cough...) ;)Scout

from infrequency :

oh no! you locked it all up! someone who's not supposed to find it, did? crap i hope everythings ok.

from oh-sweet-pea :

thanks for your kind words. i too have a secret love of the nag champa. i light up sticks when no one is around and i hope and pray that no one decides to stop by while i'm burning its sweet scent. as for the zine, i'll let you know when the new one rears it's ugly head.

from bluecinema :

where else can i leave fan mail? i want to rave about how much i love your writing but it doesn't fit here. you really are wonderful.

from infrequency :

wet change. hmmm. i've always wondered what a wax crayon or maybe a black magic marker would do to a transfer. really. wet change.

from punkunicorn :

i do so love this.

from manukenkun :

look after yourself ok?

from bluecinema :

I feel like you live in a universe parallel to mine. Eerie. I'm going to keep reading. Sing on sister.

from oh-sweet-pea :

oh i'm liking your diary so much and i'm only two pages in! more. more. more!

from manukenkun :

Those girls didn't really say that did they? That is too funny for words and the same dress showdown, i'd like to have seen that oh yes!

from infrequency :

"a good greasy plate of refried beans, avocado, fried tomatoes, panfries, and toast." i could w/out the tomato. but then i've never had fried tomato, maybe it's good. either way, anything w/both refried beans and panfries, is going to kick some fine ass. and the avacado would just be a cherry, on top. man that sounds good. is it served at a local place?

from manukenkun :

what has become of us?

from manukenkun :

OOh I think there must be some kinda love bug going around or something, I totally get the fear it's all doomed thing you were talking about, like everything is going so well and i'm so happy right now it's just bound to all come crashing down isn't it? And lusting after apartments, nothing wrong with that at all, i've cried in the past over not getting the place I wanted so...maybe it's that old Virgoan thing again? Good luck!

from nolimetanger :

shit-faced is a pretty accurate way to describle ickle isaac. he's so cute because I can totally tell under that audience-berating, eat-shit-and-die exterior lies a side that wishes us to eat even more shit and die even faster. where are you aptmt hunting? I'm doing it too, it's a bitch. I kind of wish it was like brave new world, and we were all pre-assigned residences and jobs...this growing up stuff sucks a lot more than tv told me it would.

from manukenkun :

Glad you came back to us!

from manukenkun :

where you been Kissoff? It's been 8 days, I miss you! I am recovering from too many cocktails and staying up til 6 with the boy who gives me records. Come back!

from grlscout :

Wow - reading your journal entry today brought back a ton of my own memories and feelings of insecurity from high school. Funny, I discovered Ani Difranco at about 20 years old and I couldn't believe I hadn't found her before, some of those songs (32 flavours for one) made so much sense to me. I used to excuse myself from class to go to the bathroom and check my hair, check my clothes, check my skin a hundred times a day, each look in the mirror making me more and more certain that I was ugly, fat and so uninteresting, nobody would like me. I'm just about to go back to school to become a high school English teacher this fall and my eyes will be peeled for girls like us. Somehow I'm going to get across to those kids that every year you live on this planet you become more and more self aware, more and more confident, and you realise that all that shit that is fed into your brain as a teenager about how you should look and how you should judge everyone around you to make yourself feel better - it's all just kid-stuff, and it passes, and you make real friends and work on bettering yourself from the inside finally. I'll try anyway. Your diary is great - thanks for signing my book. ;)

from ladypete :

right on!! nice entry.

from manukenkun :

Hmm i'm a Virgo too, give me more insight into our ways would you please? I'm hoping to be able to hang out with the ex like that one day...

from emotionalist :

on your 6-01 entry: you are saying all the things i hope i will be able to say the next time he returns. what a wonderful random entry for me to come across...

from manukenkun :

sometimes you're so tough it scares me. I wish I could be tought like you. x

from shabbiness :

J. dear, buy me fake plastic flowers, magenta, not pink. summing-up-contradictions.

from manukenkun :

I still don't know how to describe you on my favourites list...tell me how...hey why do we gurls all like Bukowski if he's meant to be such an old bastard? I heart drunk old bastards.

from shabbiness :

yes please......feed those blackbirds with xanax, make them shut up.

from ladypete :

thanks for the hello kissoff. i'm going to go check out your stories. later on lady.

from shabbiness :

hahah, yeah I love my new job, god how I love this, I am going to organize fancy film festivals and film installations. i will be paid to visit artist's studio's and blather with them about their work and endeavour. no one ever told me that the world could be such a wonderful place, listenting to stereolab, guess you recommended it to me, dancing in the kitchen in a summerdress until my friend I. comes for dinner. life is good, j. love, e.

from shabbiness :

hey little boy would you like to know what I have got in my pocket or not? its no ploy, its no gimmick its a chance of a lifetime.....hahah, fuck this j. i cannot sleep and it is almost 5 AM, birds sing too loud and frivolous. oh -- i added the notes-feature to my journal, you can leave me messages now.

from savemyskin :

that collection makes me drool. I also have the Lomo 4-picture cam, but I would NEVER refer to it as a mere 'toy'! have some pride in your quadcam, please. also, I didn't write about it for some reason, but I caved, and two days ago, bought the lomo directly from their website. you get a lot of nice things in the [very expensive] deal. I guess you don't need it, but if you ever get a big, lucky tax return like me it seems so worth it.

from shabbiness :

hold me just like the morning papers and I wont kill your parents and roast them on a stick -- keep your fingers crossed for me, i have a glorius date with a messed hair artist! e.

from infrequency :

japancakes. yes, yes they are. what a great record. i seriously listened to the new one, and the last one twice today, while working. do you know if they ever tour? later

from banana3159 :

Thanks for your rad g-book comments. much appreciated.

from venvy :

Einstein said it best: "imagination is more important than knowledge."

from venvy :

you have great tastes in music--if u like belle and sebastian, u'd probably like The Lucksmiths-that's if u haven't heard of them yet:)

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