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I was so sad to read this. I'm sorry you're having a hard time and I miss seeing your words here. I hope you can find a way to speak your truth, from a place of love, to your dad - to have an authentic relationship with him even if you feel he's not being authentic. What you do, who you are, in that relationship is what you have to live with at the end of the day. He'll have to face his own demons. Whatever you decide to do, I wish you courage and strength and wisdom. - Zuzu

from xevilsuziex :

I completely understand every word you are saying. I don't know if you remember, but I wrote you a long time ago about my situation with my own Father. I can't tell you how to act or what to do, but I can offer this: I don't think life is really about how we feel or what we think. It's about choosing which memories to make and which things we want shaping our future and the lives of those we're close to. Do you want memories of standing your ground and missing out on moments with your Dad, because you don't approve of his choices, or do you want memories of setting your feelings aside to be there for him, to try to make him happy, even though it affects you so deeply? There really is no right or wrong answer, it's just what you would want to look back on. Which path will teach your girls the best way to handle things? Which path will make you a better person?

from lerin :

((((HUGS))))

from lerin :

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend Sarah. When you lose friend so young, it seems so unnatural... I lost a friend I'd had since kindergarten in a car crash when we were both 19. I still dream about her fairly often. It just feels so wrong. I do know the feelings.

from lerin :

Hmmm... isn't it ILLEGAL to pay waitresses less than minimum wage? That's why if you work a party or if you rake in low/no tips, the restaurant is supposed to pay you minimum wage. At least, that's the way it was in Oklahoma!

from endthelies :

Ok, I'm sure how the law works where you are, but your bosses not upping your pay might well be illegal. If it lowers your average pay for the month below the minimum wage, then it's almost certainly illegal. It would be here. Good luck dealing with bosses like that!

from lerin :

I'm so happy for you, Kate-Heart! :)

from lerin :

I hope I didn't hurt your feelings! I just put a "diaryland" link up to my diaryland buddy list, so I would keep checking diaryland daily. You are definitely a favorite, and I love you!

from lerin :

That schedule is brutal! I hope a shorter commute and less stress will put you two back where you belong. XOX

from lerin :

Another one? Oh no... you guys are way too young to have to deal with those kinds of issues. XOX

from lerin :

I hope you get some good drugs for the back! XOX

from elliestuff :

lovely diary. lots to do it sounds before the move. hope things go smoothly.

from lerin :

I too have failed at every home-organization technique thing I've ever encountered. Maybe someday, I will be organized. I get on these kicks where everything is done but it lasts three weeks, max. Then it all falls to crap again! Oh well, playing with my babies all day is more important than having a model home. :) Oh and on night-weaning... Ben had a really hard night again and I started crying, telling Adam I was ready to give up! He made me, MADE me, stick to it while he comforted Ben-Ben. I feel so guilty that I started this whole thing, but I *do* know I've got to get more sleep.

from lerin :

(((HUGS)))

from zuzus-petals :

I'm sorry you've been having a hard time. My thoughts are with you. - Zuzu

from lerin :

Oh no... what happened?!?

from lerin :

You're past due for another entry, love.

from lerin :

And I was just thinking about how much I missed real winters, with actual snow... lol.

from lerin :

Ha ha ha... I write half-entries and email them to myself all of the time. It's hard to get enough time to actually write a whole entry!!!

from lerin :

You liar! Update, right now. I command it. ;)

from lerin :

Yeah sure... that's precious. I hope you're doing okay after the goodbyes!!!

from junitown :

that's sweet :)

from wheeless :

That was so beautiful.

from zuzus-petals :

That's beautiful.

from newlywedblis :

They say that us writers thrive on rejection slips... I say they're dumb. :-P That stinks that you put in all that work and had that reaction... sometimes people ask for things that can't be done, and sometimes they can be done but it just wouldn't be creative or good to do them that way. Remember that you worked hard, and you ARE good at what you do. Writing is all about faith... in yourself!

from zuzus-petals :

Do you teach the girls sign language before they can speak? - Zu

from newlywedblis :

Hey--I've heard you mention freelancing a couple times now....I would love to do some of this, but I don't even know where to start. I have a journalism degree, so my training is all working w/newspapers/magazines, etc. If you don't mind sharing your contacts/tips/etc., you can email me at [email protected]

from lowercaseg :

Hi! Lerin referred me to you, in asking her about ghostwriting. My husband is really interested in it, and I was wondering if you would have any advice on how to get started, et cetera. You can leave me a note at my dland. or email - mellieemo @ yahoo.com thanks so much!

from lerin :

Do you have Health Insurance? You may be able to do what I'm doing... go to the doctor, explain how you feel. Marci is worth it... (and so are YOU!)

from zuzus-petals :

Maybe just go outside and play. Check this out: http://www.thesunmagazine.org/374_Louv.pdf (Might do you both some good?) Thoughts are with you. - Zuzu

from lerin :

I can REALLY relate to your feelings right now, and that's exactly why I went to the doctor and got me some Zoloft. I hope it helps me! It's awful to feel so overwhlemed and hopeless. ((HUGS))

from thedetails :

That�s too bad about Jamie�s Mom, I hope the assisted living thing works out. I have a theory about Marci�s messiness. EB is about 2 years older than his sister, and after Dot was born EB started to tear the house apart. He�d dump his toy bin and leave his toys all over the house, he�d rip apart anything he could. He would tip over his cups and bowls, on purpose. I was so frustrated. And then I thought maybe he was doing it as a game, a way to �interact� with Mom and leave his sis out of the picture for a bit. So I started making him help me with the clean ups, mostly it was my hand over his hand and making him pick stuff up and put it away. But the point was he got to feel what it was like to have to clean up. I even gave him cloths to help clean up the spills. And on days when he didn�t make a mess I made a big deal about it, and put aside some time to do something special with him. I�d give him a choice of a couple of things we could do together, read, play a game for a few minutes, color together, etc. This would happen right when Dot went to sleep, that way we could spend time together without me worrying about being interrupted. Soon he wasn�t being so destructive. It didn�t stop the problem completely, but it helped. I don�t know if this will help you or not, but I thought it might at least give you some ideas to try with her.

from lerin :

Yes! Sorry I missed this earlier. It's just hertinyhands/hertinyhands

from tennisdiva :

Hey, how are things? hope babies are well. I didnt realize marci is turning three! how fast did that go? Crazy katie! ~Tree

from zuzus-petals :

Coolio! Post some of the pics?

from lerin :

WOW! Go for it... I am so proud of you!!!

from cardiogirl :

If you can't visit your sister-in-law, why not go to the playland in the mall? It's free, something to do and the area has stuff for babies to crawl on. It will get you out of the house, something to do and play time for the girls...

from zuzus-petals :

I don't know how feasible it is.. I don't pass this anecdote along with the notion that it will "work" - when I was a kid, my mother, with four children, ha to have her "alone" time. She put us to bed at 7:30 every night. This gave her several hours in the evenings to read, think, visit with neighbors, etc. If we weren't 'tired' - she made it clear this was the schedule and she wasn't veering from it. If we stared at the ceiling until we fell asleep - so be it - this was her time. I don't know how she got it to work when we were very young (Marci's age.) At some point, when the eldest of us was about 10, she made deals with her that she could stay up later IF she got the younger kids to go to sleep.. so she had a mission to read to us and do anything she could to get us to go to sleep so she could sneak downstairs and hang quietly with mom....

from lerin :

The only thing I can compare it to is moving from my hometown to here, feeling like I was losing everything that made me feel like ME. You are losing your tangible things from the past, and it is more difficult for you because of the memroies of the person you are losing along with it. I'm sorry... you must feel like your heart is breaking.

from tennisdiva :

Kaie, we ought to have lunch sometime. please call. ~Tree PS, I want to see the new baby.

from lerin :

How ling before Jamie is out of school?

from tennisdiva :

Katie, I have not been on facebook since october 2nd....when i saw that my darling boyfriend nabil took some whore to homecoming and posted it on that horrid website. anyway, call.

from lerin :

What a jerk... I'm sorry!

from tennisdiva :

Kaie, I need you to call me! Are you only writing for one magazine or are you allowed to write for others? ~Theresa

from lerin :

Oh my gosh! I had the EXACT same visions of the whole car-crashing thing when I was pregnant with Bella! I *knew* there was something scary that I was obsessively thinking about! Thanks for making me feel a whole lot less crazy.

from zuzus-petals :

Right on, girl! That rocks! - Zuzu

from ashnwesten :

Hm, maybe I should look into getting that book! I am the EXACT same way.. so unorganized & my house is always a mess. Not because I WANT it to be that way but just because I'm too lazy, I guess! Anyways, I hope it works for you, and that's great you're trying to be optimistic. I can't imagine handling two kids as much as you have to!

from junitown :

congrats on the job thing!

from lerin :

We are feelingthe exact same frustration right now! As perfect as he is, I often wonder if Adam thinks I just play on the computer and nap and talk on the phone all day. He used to KNOW how hard my job was when I was working at night and weekends when he was with the kids. But then, I just had double duty... I'd come home on the weekends and the house would be trashed, yet somehow I managed to watch our children AND get housework done. Men. I *know* that getting your license will help the whole shut-in feeling. Don't you just LOVE MeetUp? I've met so many great stay-at-home moms in the area because of it.

from thedetails :

I'm the same way with my driving, no confidence. I was trying to get my license a few years back and just couldn't get enough confidence in myself to do the test. I'm waiting until the weather gets all warmer and sunny before I try again. Hope yours goes well.

from garypharrell :

You're doing fine. We all see the pictures and you take Marci places and play with her. Trust me, she never looks sad in the pictures. It's just an adjustment time for both of you. Once Scarlett can play, her and Marci can entertain each other and you can have some moments for yourself. But by then, you'll be feeling left out. It'll get easier. When you get some time, go to www.babycenter.com, click on the journals and read Anna, Clara and Me...or click here...http://www.babycenter.com/general/baby/1490337.html She's going through the same thing. It might help to realize that you aren't the only one.

from lerin :

You love both of your babies, but transitioning from one to two is really hard. Believe me, I haven't forgotten. Marci needs to be able to get out of the house and be a toddler... and YOU need time to get out of the house and be a person. Probably the thing that has helped me most is going to parks/playgrounds with other moms around my age and letting Sophie burn off all her energy that she had being cooped up in the house and geting to talk to other grown-up people. Sophie ALWAYS acted up (and still does, sometimes!) due to excessive energy. I am probably one of the least organized people in the world, but once I started having a little "routine" in the house, I found that I got more done AND had more time to myself at the end of the day. Don't let it be "all or nothing." You may not have a sparkling clean house, but taking fifteen minutes before bed to pick up a few things and wipe down counters makes me feel much better when I wake up in the morning. You may not have two hours to play with Marci all alone, but taking fifteen minutes to read a few of her favorite books or go for a walk while pushing Scarlett may make her feel better. Just some ideas... But, I do wish we lived closer to one another. I think being an at-home mom is one of the loneliest jobs in the world sometimes, and having good friends makes all the difference.

from zuzus-petals :

It sounds like you're being so hard on yourself.. like things are difficult enough, you have to beat yourself up on top of it. Just remember how you felt about your mom... no one could replace her and ESPECIALLY at Marci's age, I bet you didn't even understand "hate." She loves you. She cries and acts out precisely because she loves you. I'm not a mom, but I have one of the best moms on the planet. Would you like me to have her read your blog and give you some words? - Zuzu

from fuckupayme :

aww sweetie :[ i know you dont know me, but i read your diary all the time & its my favorite. but anyways, i just wanted to drop you a note and tell you this: i know im not a mother [yet] and i dont know what youre going through but in my opinion: you are a WONDERFUL mother by all means. all i have to do is read your diary and i can tell. yes, you get stressed and yes, you breakdown at times.. but what mother doesnt? i know mine did. and as i got older i realized more and more how much she did for me and now shes like my best friend. all children go through a phase where they feel rejected by their parents at one point or another, but eventually they all grow out of it. thats how the first few years are gonna be. and they will NEVER hate you for it!! she's just too young to understand at this point. i know your feeling down and depressed right about now but it will get better and in the end both of your babies will love you more then ever :] and i dont know if this will work, but once everyone is feeling good again.. maybe you all can do fun things together? i know it sounds crazy because you have a newborn and a toddler and there doesnt seem like a whole lot of things a newborn will enjoy.. but hmm.. maybe dressing up and taking funny pictures together? im bad at ideas, but im sure you can figure something out :] i hope you feel better.. please keep your head up <3

from lerin :

Poor thing! Get well fast.

from ashnwesten :

Hope the driving goes well. :)

from lerin :

I looked at my old emails, but I don't still have your password. Send it to me at [email protected] and I'll see if I can fix your template for you. :)

from lerin :

Hey, your template is completely messed up! Need some help? Happy New Year... I hope you and the girls had fun last night together.

from zuzus-petals :

I've been meaning to send you a missive.. a free "comments" thing (http://www.haloscan.com/) Indigomonkey (aka Cassie) turned me on to it. Check it out. Happy new year! - Zu

from lerin :

OUCH! I've had a couple of those myself. They make you feel like you have a terrible flu and you can't even move your arms because of the pain. It sounds like you DO need some chocolate chip cookies... I'll have to send you some when I get around to my Christmas baking. You'll have to promise me that you will eat them and not share very many, though.

from zuzus-petals :

my favorite is definitely DSC 0743... that just cracked me up! - Zu

from lerin :

A) Of all the places he could possibly get a job, it SUCKS that he picked the place that Jamie works. B) Ouch. I'll keep that in mind if I am ever tempted. C) I sort-of hate you... I never got back in shape after Isabella, and I know I'm going to be paying for it when it comes time to drop the baby weight from Ben.

from zuzus-petals :

Sometimes forgiveness is a process... it comes (and goes) in waves.. it's not always a neat little package you can give someone.

from zuzus-petals :

So.. what happened, did Jamie kick is ass?

from lerin :

This is going to be a difficult time... the dynamic of your family has totally changed! Poor you, poor Marci... I was lucky that Sophie was older. I'll bet Isabella has problem with understanding the needs of the new baby too in a few months. Hang in there, Mama. It will definitely get better. But you'll have to keep writing about how it all happens, so I can get good advice from YOU for when it's my turn!

from zuzus-petals :

Congrats! Everything sounds awesome! - Zu

from lerin :

The pictures... oh, the pictures melted my heart!!! My favorites are of Marci, adoring her new baby, both little girls being cuddled by their mommy... Congratulations, and you ALL are gorgeous.

from ashnwesten :

Congratulations!!!! She is absolutely beautiful, and you look amazing even after birth! I'm so glad all went well.. Now you have two amazing little girls & an adorable family!

from zuzus-petals :

Welcome to the world little sister of Marci, little red button of a flower in her mom's heart! I can hardly wait to see pictures of your little blossoming poppy! - Zuzu

from fuckupayme :

well its thursday.. i hope everything went well today

from ashnwesten :

I just turned 23 too! I *love* being 23 so much better than 22 for some reason, though! 24 and above is when I'll start to feel old! haha. Anyways, I have a cure for the flu, but I don't remember exactly what it is. It's garlic juice and onion juice.. then I thought there was one more minor thing.. I've never tried it & it sounds awful, but everyone says it's guaranteed to work. If you could summon up enough courage, you could probably find it online! Good luck with the birth too!!!

from lerin :

And have they talked about inducing you yet?

from lerin :

I'm irritable on your behalf. I'm sorry... I hope your little girl decides to stop waiting around. You know she just wants to make her dramatic entrance... fashionable late?

from lerin :

You poor thing! I can't imagine losing the person I'd built a relationship with for all those months when it is time to deliver. Jamie is right though... your pretty baby girl will be here soon, no matter who delivers her. I'm adding your baby-diary. ;)

from zuzus-petals :

I hope you've been quiet here because you've been off birthing a fabulous baby girl! Thoughts are with you. - Zu

from lerin :

YOU CRACK ME UP! Yes, you're right. You have the same sense of humor that I did. I laughed out lous when I read that this morning.

from lerin :

Poor thing! Apartment living sucks sometimes. I never wrote here about how much I HATED the people hwo lived around me when i was 9 months with Bella. I hope your little Scarlet comes TODAY! As for PPD, totally get some medication for that. I'm serious. There is no reason for you to have to go through that again. alk to your doctor before you leave the hospital. I don't think you can talk yourself out of it, and I want you to be healthy, happy, and well! I am so surprised by just how DAZED I feel at the idea of a little boy. I wanted a boy someday, but I always just saw myself ending up with a house full of like 5 pretty little girls. I don't know WHAT to do with a boy! But I looked at nursery sets and clothes all day yesterday and it got me a little excited. It's just so... weird, somehow!

from zuzus-petals :

I loathe noise. My property is adjacent to a restaurant. It's not their patrons that bug me (the patrons are actually really considerate) it's the owner and employees. They're loud as fu@^ and sit next to the property line and yammer. It sometimes starts at 7 am and often they're bringing the trash out and banging things around until midnight. But/and those darn construction workers, you can't even ask 'em to be quiet. You could maybe see if you can find the foreman, show him your nine months pregnant, and ask them if they could please, please, please not start work until after 9 am. And/or, you can call your local town hall or police and inquire about noise ordinances and codes. If you're not sure, call the police and file a noise complaint. Eventually the police will tell you whether or not they can actually do anything about it. Askign them to start later first in a polite and neighborly way and then making it their problem with law enforcement is the best way to go. You can try the civil route first. I'd also complain to the landlord and ask for a discount on your rent due to the inconvenience. Okay.. anyways... I can hardly wait to hear of Scarlett's arrival amongst the birthed. - Zu

from zuzus-petals :

it's becoming increasingly difficult to leave you notes. Remove the code for the comments since the feature expired with the gold membership or somehow otherwise got turned off and fix the code on the page so we can click through to well wish! The links are broken (I had to go back to my buddy list and click through on profile.) Because, you know, I figure you have all this time on your hands to fix your dland code (NOT)... But really, the questions of the day. 1) How's that baby coming? and 2) Is it done yet? Cheers - Zu

from lerin :

Look at that gorgeously huge pregnant tummy!!!! You are such a beautiful family.

from lerin :

Poor Kate! I completely understand why you are so frustrated. Why doesn't anyone foolow through for what they promise? Grrr...

from zuzus-petals :

I just think it's great that you can write a little missive sayiing, "I want to wish you the best of luck in your life together and send my regrets that I will not be able to attend your committment ceremony given the proximity to my due date. I'm sure you understand." It's just so elegant and tasteful and simple and you don't have to explain other feelings for not, perhaps, wanting to attend. - Zu

from lerin :

Your comment on my last entry made me laugh so hard I almost cried.

from lerin :

Wow, you are so close!!! I'm so excited.

from ashnwesten :

Sounds like you're close!! All of that does seem odd & I think it would be a bit frightening to me. I wasn't completely induced with Westen.. My water broke, but I never dilated further than a 1, so they then had to use Pitocin to help me along.. I did it without an epidural & it honestly was fine.. So if you're really that against one, I really wouldn't worry about it too much. I'm SURE you can do it if I can! Either way, though, I hope things happen soon & things go well.. I can't wait to see your little one!

from lerin :

Scarlett Rose is such a pretty name. And red is my favorite color, so I really would have loved your baby shower. :) I'm happy for you. I always love it when you update.

from lerin :

I know it was confusing... I originally wrote the whole story from my Dad's perspective in March 2005 somewhere. I should have linked it. But yeah... Joseph is my older brother, and Jared is my maybe. Leta was his mother... the woman my dad was with between Joseph's mom and my mom. Did that help? Or did I make it more confusing than ever... lol.

from zuzus-petals :

It is wierd isn't it? I don't know what he expects/expected from me.. maybe not anything at all - maybe (likely?) in his mind nothing he wrote was untoward or icky. I'm actually less insulted by anything he said about me, but could you imagine if Jamie described YOU as this girl whose sister is a christian rock singer who he knocked up outta highschool? He didn't even mention this womans name. It's just so objectified around all the wrong things and makes me feel on the one hand sad for her and like he's creepier than I ever wholly understood. It's all very icky - makes me feel like I wanna take a shower. Yew! - Zu

from zuzus-petals :

Glad the words were useful.. take what helps and discard the rest. Wish you the best! - Zu

from thedetails :

I can relate to the baby bruising your rib. When I was pregnant with my daughter she bruised my uterus and of course she kept kicking me there, a lot. When I reached my due date I begged the doctor to induce me it was just so painful. Of course the doc did. Marciba is so cute by the way. I love it when the kids get all painted up and then pose for the Mommy to take a picture. My oldest son used to like my make up, I should see if I can find the picture of him in my lipstick. Ha ha .

from bitterwineuk :

Sorry, accidently entered before I finished my note. I have read some of your entries on how you see your marriage and how you've had your troubles. I can so relate to you, more than you may realise. I wish you find happiness in the long run. That;s all that matters. Take care and I will be keeping up with you. Becca :)

from bitterwineuk :

hiya, I've only begun reading you very recently and I so admire all your honesty. Congratulations on your pregnancy though it looks like it came as a shock from what I read. When are you due?

from busymomof2 :

Hi, my name is Brianna and I hope you don't mind me reading your diary. I got the link from Lerin. Your little girl is so adorable. And I hope you start to feel better soon.

from parkerfamily :

Hello! Could you give me your e-mail address, so I can send you the info for my diary? Thanks!

from babymakes3 :

Try not to worry about the cramps. I felt exactly like I was going to start my period when I first found out I was pregnant & I had horrible back pains for a long time. And everything ended up fine! Try not to worry yourself!

from beckers-j :

Hey, I found you through a banner. I hope things are getting better with your husband. I'll be back to read some more in the future. ;)

from lerin :

Hmmm... I don't know about 'advice' per se. One thing I have noticed about both of us though... we both put a lot into people who don't reciprocate. We both crave closeness with friends, but for one reason or another... it's like maybe in high school, you can be closer to someone than you can ever be afterward. You know what I mean? Like maybe you just don't make new freinds with that kevel of intimacy as you grow up? Stephanie is still my best friend... and I know I'll never have anyone like her again. But she is in Maryland. About Jamie... talk to him. Open up to him. You should be going out !together! 90% of the time. You do need girl-time and he needs guy-time... but your separate set of friends has caused problems in the past. You are both still so young, and of course you want to go out. But please, hire a babysitter and do it together. I know you love each other, but if you want this to last, you need to reconnect. You know what I mean? I love you so sooooo much, and I wish we were in the same city.

from zuzus-petals :

I'm sorry you got fired. It doesn't sound like it was warranted - it sounds like they screwed you. That SO sucks. Maybe in the end it's all misplaced loyalty.. maybe at the end of the day it's what you need to move on and realize your potential... whatever the case, however, it really sucks and I'm sorry to hear it. - Zu

from piotr :

It was excellent and disturbing. I finished it in about twelve hours, but some of that was sleep, so maybe six or so of reading? I thought it was clearer that I had to finish it straight out, but I did notice that i didn't say so. But yeah, it's intense, and quite honestly, it's disgusting and undemocratic how we run public schools. But that's easy for me to say, or you for that matter, our schooling considered.

from hamiltonian :

I enjoy your journal and iif there was one thing I could do to add something to your life I will. So I will make an observation: it is better/healthier to observe that it is to live and see with judgment. This speaks of another type of living that most of any of us do but one that needs pointing out.

from hamiltonian :

"Ay, caramba!"

from fluttrbykiss :

In a city called Struthers... Ever hear of it?? Ever been there?? I actually just moved from there to Savannah, GA about 2 1/2 years ago...

from soft-fairy :

Your diary's not boring, and your banners sure attract readers *winks*....:-) Il keep reading-

from zuzus-petals :

Whooops, must have been an accident when I added someone (I move the names around for the sake of alpha order.. go figure.) I'll put you back in there when we get back from Santa Cruz this weekend.

from zuzus-petals :

Delete you? Huh?

from jane-dreams :

I emailed you with the new information. Man, I don't know *why* I thought unlocking would be a good idea. Diaries are meant to be provate, you know? Well, at least only shared with those you trust! :) Happy Thanksgiving! Give Marci a big kiss for me.

from imazook :

It wasn't weird...thank you:)

from imazook :

Hey, I've been reading your's too. Your little girl is sooo cute. I can try and teach you stuff. I don't really know a whole lot...but I'm willing to try! :)

from jane-dreams :

Wow, I just spent four days reading your whole diary. You have been through so much in the least few years! Believe me, I know what it is like to be married young with a baby... broke, in school, trying to scrape by. You seem to have a wonderful man by your side. I hope that you two stick it out. Be honest with him about what you are feeling. Stay true to yourself... and be careful. Don't let someone's pretty words help you compromise your beautiful little family. You are so gorgeous, Kate, Don't let anyone take advantage of that. Thank you for your sweet note! It's amazing what reading years of someone's life can do to you, isn't it? You now know me better than most of my friends! ;)

from jane-dreams :

Hi! I emailed you to your aol address. Let me know if you didn't get it. :)

from jane-does :

I remember you! I don't know when you left me the note, because it has been such a long time since I checked the page. Anyway, I am still here and still writing, only under a new username and still locked up. I will email you the new info shortly. Thank you so much for thinking of me!

from fan4 :

I like the photos you posted yesterday.

from mrcleanluver :

Thanks for the kind words about my pictures! :) Your family is soooo beautiful!!!I'm sorry you have the flu...I have it too. Sucky, eh? Hope you feel better soon and get to stop dealing with stupid customers at work. People are dumb.

from imazook :

Hi, I stumbled upon your diary. I hope that you don't mind that I read!:)

from purplebanana :

I'd love to show you how to make a layout like mine - but I didn't make it!! I'm at a much lower level...but one of my best friends is a graphic designer. Just proves that it's all about who you know!

from hissandtell :

Hi - I clicked on your "milf" banner and am enjoying your writing; I'll be back. (Also, your layout is divine.) Love, R xxx

from sarahsmells :

Hi again! Here's the info you need: username-amor password-vincitomnia. The latin makes me feel smart; it's all a cover-up. I hope you wont be disappointed in my boringness. I added you to my favorites. I'm glad I found your diary!

from sarahsmells :

Hi there. I clicked on one of your banners, and I really liked your diary! I'm twenty and also obsessed with Harry Potter, so we could squeal like thirteen year olds over it together! Do you mind if I add you as a favorite? Oh, and if you want the password for my diary, just ask :)

from fan4 :

I signed the comments thing, but don't know if you'll be able to read it or not. Normally I'm able to read your entries with no problem. However, in your current entry the words spill outside the comment box, making portions of your entry impossible for me to read.

from donut-one :

you're worried about being 21 and be obsessed with Mr.Potter...My dad is 54, and reads the books, and if anyone is to bother him while reading only The Potter books, he throws a fit. No worries. I guess it's normal.

from fan4 :

I like your name. :)

from fan4 :

I don't know why you're confused. It's actually an easy process....

from fan4 :

from fan4 :

Do you want me to teach you how to make html links?

from geeked-out :

It is in no way Horrible for you to love Harry Potter. Just like it is in no way horrible for me to love Harry Potter and secretly wish I went to Hogwarts. Or have a trip completely planned out to go buy official Wands. Nope not at all horrible, weird, or lame. I tell myself that everyday.

from namastesakhi :

silly girl, you can stalk me any time you'd like :)

from resonant :

my heart goes out to you<333

from resonant :

when i get bored i just go searching around and whatever name stands out to me ill just check it out. i loveee amelie you should see "god is great and im not" another great movie with audrie tatou. ill be reading more of you.<333

from resonant :

i came across your diary and saw that you auditioned for the vagina monologues. my sister was in it and she had to do the "reclaiming cunt" boy do i look at her differently lol. its a wonderful play though.

from sponge22bob :

Your welcome :)--You're not alone, I also have a big collection of Marilyn items! I even have a little shrine deicated to her in my room ^^. I will come back to read more of your diary very soon!

from sponge22bob :

Hey, I found your diary from the marilyn diaryring. I love that there are so many marilyn fans on d-land. I LOVE Marilyn...so is my idol pretty much. If you want, reply. Thanks for being a loyal fan XD P.S. how do you think she was killed?

from jane-does :

Thank you so much for your e-mail. And for listing me as a favorite. I know I will be back. And Marilyn Monroe? She is so sexy! :) Great layout.

from enchancea :

You have a gorgeous layout

from kitty1980 :

hi i was just checking out some new diarys ,was reading up yours a bit will make sure i come back for a read!! laterz ~~~becky

from tennisdiva :

Hi katie. I just want to let you know that not all girls are how you say they are.

from piotr :

I'm first! Yay! Welcome to diaryland, first off. I hope it is good times for you here. Sorry the circumstances for the change were funky like that though. As Strong Bad says, you are awesome. And that's all I have to say.

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