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from smashthegas :
Hey any entry is better than no entry at all! Have you seen my entries lately? Pure shite. If they were any more shite they'd be brown and sticky and be hanging from a dogs arse. Smashxxx
from stepfordtart :
Is a "moment of clarify" something like a moment of clarity? Or is it something to do with melted butter? Heeheee, Im so amusing. Moving sucks. Commiserations. s x
from stepfordtart :
I dont watch much telly and I dont think Ive ever seen the Channel 4 news.....but now I REALLY want to watch it and sing along. So. Thanks for that. s x
from stepfordtart :
I think they'd be OK if its pistols they're holding (*gasp* or maybe FLINTLOCKS! How dickturpinosaurus!) but I dont hold out much hope for getting BOTH stumpty little lizard hands on an Uzi, for example. That would just be SILLY. s x
from stepfordtart :
I read Dead Babies first (aged 15). It ended up featuring in my A Level Eng Lit dissertation, where I contrasted it with Lucky Jim in a father/son dichotomy (sp?) kind of way. Thats a realy fucking stupid thing to do. Dont ever do it. Ive read several of his since and they always leave me feeling a bit...icky. And I think he's possibly a bit of a wanker in real life. £20K on new teeth and he still cant crack a smile. s x
from smashthegas :
A shag pile? Ooh that sounds GREAT! Is it like where you all lie on the floor and mess around sticking your things into other peoples.... things? Heh. Totally forgot what I was comin here to say after seeing Stepfies comment. As she would say, "GAH!" xxx
from stepfordtart :
Whatever you do, dont drink any water. You'll do a Mr Creosote! They'll be picking bits of you out of the shag pile for months. s x
from stepfordtart :
"Panic Yourself Slim"? I think thats the same as the "Trauma Diet". I did that one when I got divorced. Its easy. You eat ONLY Filet-o-fish or mint aero, drink half a bottle of whisky every day and only EVER think "Im mid-30's with two kids and Im getting divorced. Im NEVER going to get to have sex again EVER in my whole life" over and over like a mantra. I did it for about a month. Lost 20 lbs. s x
from randomrabbit :
I once saw Pat Sharp in a club in Magalluf, which now I think about it is embarrassing for 2 reasons.
from boredlaura :
Me thinks you're right on the Sex Pistols/Funhouse theme. Ah, Funhouse, those were the days, I used to really want to race around the track in the ikkle cars collecting tokens, I never wanted to actually go in the "funhouse" though.
from stepfordtart :
Its been bugging me for ages what the MCR song reminds me of. And now I know. I shall be pointing that out to my little BabyGoth daughter during some future argument about music. I like to store things up, Im a bitch like that. s x
from acornotravez :
Word up! WORD UP!!
from stepfordtart :
Im not good at summer either. We're getting aircon in our offices next month and all I can think about is how gleeful it will be to be chilly enough to wear a proper suit to work again instead of trying to stay cool in quasi-professional summery type clothes. Aaargh. I always look cack. And sweaty. And I dont tan. The brownest I ever got (after three weeks in Mexico) was the colour of a rich tea biscuit. I dont have bingo wings tho. I DO have fucking enormous Arnie-like biceps but theyre mostly for just scaring my male colleagues! s x
from fridayfilms :
I was APPALLED when I heard about bingo wings! And then vaguely ashamed of my own...
from stepfordtart :
"townie" and "casual" are words I havent heard in a VERY long time. Hahaha, I used to use them all the time to bait my brother (he of the sinbad trousers, espadrilles and wedge hairdo). *goes misty eyed with nostalgia...or maybe from laughing* s x
from stepfordtart :
There's a lot of regional variation on the Chav theme. There's a tiny town near here where they are known as Kackers but Ive never heard the word anywhere else but there. Ive also been told (I choose to disbelieve it as its just too bloody obvious) that Chav is from Council House And Violent but I seem to recall it also having some kind of Romany roots. Im burbling now, arent I? *sigh* s x
from stepfordtart :
Hmmm, I assume, to carry on the carnival theme, that you then puked in the bushes and got off with an implausibly raven haired carney boy wearing greasy 501s and having a pack of cigs in the rolled up hem of his t-shirt sleeve. He'd be called Roy. Or Troy. I forget. Ummmm....*ahem*....*looks shifty*. s x
from stepfordtart :
Those smocks are fucking HORRIBLE arent they. No normal woman (nor any woman who can, unfortunately, remember the seventies, however fleetingly, should ever wear them. Ever). Oh, and the sinus pain? try this (from my sister the hippie-reflexology guru): massage the underside of your middle toe, quite firmly, at the place where it joins your foot. Sounds pointless and faintly ridiculous but does actually work. s x
from randomrabbit :
Why, thank you m'dear!
from stepfordtart :
Just typed (and deleted) a big fat crap joke about EATING Marathons and walking slowly and then remembered that now they're called Snickers it just didnt make any sense. *sigh*. Ignore me. s x
from stepfordtart :
BF has been trying to convince me to do stand up for five years. Reading your last enforced my long-held resolution that I will never EVER do it. I feel your pain, dear (but I AM sure they were laughing more than you think they were!). s x
from stepfordtart :
Guess what I should be doing instead of this? Finishing a velvet cape that I am making for a friend who does role play games. I read the phrase "velvet cape" and felt a pang of guilt. Luckily it wasnt a big one. s x
from boredlaura :
You can't just say "Baby Jesus taking some lepers bowling" and leave us dangling like tits in the breeze waiting for the context. We need details, for starters: ten-pin bowling or OAP lawn bowls?
from stepfordtart :
I use a strawberry syrup that I get in Belgium - sometimes they have it in Lidls too. Or Safeways (Morrison's/whatever)do it in a carton ready-made (or they used to!). s x (d'ya think I can get any more brackets (or parentheses) into this comment)?
from acornotravez :
I *love* wasabi peas.
from smashthegas :
I drank three pints of Fosters and four pins of Stella last night. Jolly good stuff.
from bitterwineuk :
hey, have a good weekend anyway. My whole month has been like that and I am really enjoying being so popular, you should too. Take care! :)
from smashthegas :
Who are you then? Stepfie clearly knows, but hasn't told me, and I'm too dumb to guess :( Smashxxx
from stepfordtart :
Wasabi peas are one of those food stuffs which I can never make my mind up about. They might be divine or they might be vile depending on how Im feeling. Likewise gherkins, set yoghurt, mars bars, weetabix. We have a bag of wasabi peas in the larder. At some point I have eaten about 7/8 of the bag (in one hit!) but now I dont think I like them. Fancy some pink custard? I'll put it in a marge pot and DHL it! s x
from stepfordtart :
Apricots are cack anyways, so I think its a bonus to only have 5 in a packet. I never could get the hang of those 'slow eater' kids - sometimes my kids bring one home for tea and its all I can do to not yell "CHEW and SWALLOW, CHEW and OHFERFUCKSSAKEGETAMOVEON!". Mercifully, my own offspring are gluttons. s x PS Oh! And I do sometime make pink custard. With chocolate sponge. I think its my inner dinner-lady.
from randomrabbit :
Even with my Sherlockian/Professor Yaffle-esque powers of deduction I hadn't deduced you had/are an alter ego or have been a previous ego, or something, I don't know. Sorry about the apricots.
from acornotravez :
Thank you for the add - I have henceforth reciprocated!
from stepfordtart :
Kinda thought I recogniosed you from before but I am a bit of a spaz so assumed I was wrong. Glad you turned your comments on, means I can say Hi, and thanks for adding me. I will naturally reciprocate. We have Bugsy Malone on DVD, my kids love it. I like to watch it for laughing at that bloke out of The Bill (and Dexter Fletcher). s x
from bitterwineuk :
Hello, thank you for adding me to your list of faves. Always good to see fellow Southerners (sort of) on here. I'm in Essex so not too far off. I will be back! :) Becca
from annanotbob :
Hurrah you turned your notes on! Just wanted to say thanks for adding me and for your nice note xxx
from boredlaura :
Oh your first note, and it's from me, aren't you the lucky one! You added me which was very nice of you because hell, I'm a whore for the attention. And I shall be returning the gesture, because although you've only written the two entries so far I enjoyed them both muchly. That is all.

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