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it makes me cry the way your mother at least tries to understand you. ...is there a way that we can nestle inside each other and feel the comfort. i need the physical containment - to know that there is someone wrapped around me who knows...i know we are too far away...but it is what i pine and cry for...i will never have a mother who tries to understand in the least...

from luxelady :

moving is an awfully stressful thing to go through - try to take care of yourself, ok?

from luxelady :

she's always following...like the shadow you can never quite catch...

from aqualimestar :

I used to do that too. Make food, throw it away, make more... It is because you are starving but that panicky feeling comes over and you can't eat. It sucks, I know :(

from trinaboo :

you are so interesting, i was mesmerized by your diary. sadly, i cannot control myself so i may never conquer my weight issues. but i just wanted to comment on reading your diary, its very intense.

from luxelady :

i know the feeling...everyone keeps asking if i am losing weight and the damn scale won't move!! what the hell??? xx luxe

from luxelady :

whoa. honey take care of yourself, ok? i'm thinking of you

from luxelady :

you have NO idea...i wish that all the time...xx luxe

from luxelady :

thanks for the congrats babe!! xx luxe

from luxelady :

hey hun - please be careful...try to take care of yourself as best you can...thinking of you. xx luxe

from luxelady :

thanks for the sweet note!! please don't overstress yourself, you need to get lots of rest!! prolly impossible with a new baby, huh? thinking of you xx luxe

from luxelady :

thanks for the kind note - you're right i'd just love to disappear...but i have to go back...and now i'm pissed - i hope i don't end up giving TOO much attitide!! xx luxe

from luxelady :

poor is frightening. when i came out of the hospital the last time, i had no job, thousands and thousands of dollars owed in medical bills (i was uninsured) plus hundreds of thousands in student loans owed. you literally feel like you're in quicksand and it's getting harder and harder to keep your head clear...but it does work out eventually, try to keep that in mind if you can...i've got my fingers crossed for your husband to get the job! xx luxe

from luxelady :

i am speechless...your family is so beautiful. what an amazing experience - i've never gone through it, but you took me right there with you. the pictures took my breath away. you have something truly amazing in your life. xx luxe

from luxelady :

thanks for your kind note...i try to be careful but that mean voice in my head can be so loud sometimes...xx luxe

from enurta :

thank you for adding me and thank you for the sweet comment. your words mean a lot to me <3

from luxelady :

thank you for your kind words - it's so sweet of you...xx luxe

from luxelady :

lets go be hermits together, that way we can hide from the world but still have human contact...xx luxe

from straysparrow :

Thanks for the very nice note! Cheers, Sparrow. xx

from luxelady :

being stuck in the middle of anything is never good - it's terrible when it's your own family, impossible when it's another's...oh, and just search the internet for free diaryland layouts/templates and you should find places that have them - or you can click on the design link on my page to take you to one...hang in there...xx luxe

from sapphire02 :

I'll change in later once you get in.

from luxelady :

can i have your pw?

from luxelady :

how was seeing your moon sister? ps - always glad to see you update

from luxelady :

whoa girl. i'm sorry. xx

from luxelady :

don't listen to other peoples' shit/hypocrisy - you do what you gotta do to get by - xx luxe

from luxelady :

i'm so sorry for your loss - thinking of you xx luxe

from me-destruitt :

I am so, so very sorry.

from luxelady :

i feel the same way - i always look to see what you have to say. it does feel good to know someone else out there feels like i do...xx luxe

from laura-ly :

I know the struggle that comes between Ana and Mia much too well. It's hard, when you want one so badly, but the other is just so much easier. I hope you find peace with yourself, in whatever you do. Take care. -Laura

from fleshandbone :

Thank you for your note. I'm sorry to hear about your recent loss as well, I try to focus on the fact that I was so privileged to be his granddaughter, and to be the recipient of his love for almost 27 years. Take care.

from fleshandbone :

Late Happy New Year.

from gonebad4good :

Thanks for being the first to sign my notes! I'd love the link to your live journal again ( I was girlgonebad shhhh!!!) I hope u have a great holiday!

from girlgonebad :

thanks for the kind note. I have been glued to my computer, reading your livejournal ever since. How will I know when you update it? Thanks again, you are so sweet! *hugs*

from thinisin910 :

Hey thanks for the tips of what to say to my sister, she just gets me soo frustrated some times! Thats awsome that those jeans fit and their loose too! I love that feeeling! Take care. Have a good day. <3 jenn

from thinisin910 :

Hey thanks for the compliment, although i feel so gross right now.. ick! =( Take care, <3 jenn

from thintowin :

Hi. Thanks for the nice note. I am feeling better. I swear, I am the queen of mood swings... right now I am high on life and supremely confident about getting a good job. Tomorrow I will be scraping the floor again... maybe. Oh well, if I at least stay on the swing I always have the next high to look forward to, right?

from thinisin910 :

Hey, yeah i just joined the ed sufferer diary ring and stubbled upon your diary. You seem like an awsome person. take care, <3 jenn

from thintowin :

Holy crap! "Pull the plug?" WTF?! I would be so enraged, I would have that nurse or whatever he was fired! How is your grandfather reacting to that? That could really fuck with someones mind. Geez, that's basically telling someone that their worth to society is over. So not true when he has you loving him still. What worries me is that you always hear about cases where a diabolical nurse or doctor goes around killing their patients and they get away with it for a long time because the patients were terminally ill anyways... creepy. Get this guy far away from you grandfather, please. XXOO

from thintowin :

Hi babe, I am sending a hug for you and your Papa. XOXO

from thintowin :

Yay! I am so envious! I wanna be at my skinny point for 8 years!

from thintowin :

Hi, thanks for the note. Yeah, I was skipping days too, but no more. I am going to make it my religion. I can swim, it would be about the same, some days it might bother my joints and some days not at all, I am actually going to attend a daily aqua-aerobics class after work (if I get out on time). :)

from thintowin :

hey! nice to see you are still writing! I promise I won't disappear again... :)

from caged-freed :

saw you were a member of the edsufferer diaryring and thought this new forum at caged-freed might interest you. check it out, if you can, and take care.

from angel115 :

Well how are you? I would like to leave you my email address so we can use that instead of leaving notes/guestbook for all to read. It is [email protected].

from angel115 :

Thanx for your note. It is good to meet another ana that is over 23, and that has kids. You and I are the same height and weight! We could fast together or something. You have better willpower than me though. I have read your whole diary and you've said alot of the things I feel.

from ladymariann :

Thanks for your message! It is glad to know another ana mom that isn't a teenager. Well even if you weren't a mom, its nice to know one close to my age! I added you to my diary list - hope that was ok!

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