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you were born to write. you were born to be in the shoes you are in right now because someday they will walk you away. you have a gift. don't sell yourself short. don't doubt yourself. we all need you to embrace risk... who else could possibly capture this all so perfectly? once again- none of this self doubt bs. it's in your heart- that's enough to go on.

from edithelaine :

i have ravishing dreams and i miss you, i could just rake the curtains with my fingernails, or bite my coat sleeve in frustration.

from edithelaine :

i bought I WAS A TEENAGE FAIRY because you suggested it and she reminds me of you. the sky was purple and i thought maybe you were being listened to at that moment.

from edithelaine :

when i think of frida kahlo's dresses, pretty reds and yellows opening up like a forest, i think of you giggling.

from edithelaine :

i miss wearing tights on windy days and dress shoes that were very scuffed up and feeling beautiful before i was terrorized by boys and curious girls...when i think of robert i just want to scream and i wish there was never a first...only you, you, you. i wish my prayers were listened to and that you never had a sadness happen and i wish i didn't feel so self-conscious in my bathing-suit in swimming pools. i wish i never knew that lust existed...i wish that seed was never planted... i wish i never knew my father, only birthday parties and ice skates and slumber parties... you're like my mother and holy spirit and the sunlight that dances across the ocean... i am so sad tonight.

from edithelaine :

i am like a lifeless jumprope without you: i mope and whisper, where's my friend? as i pull up the covers.

from abrayla :

Happy Yule!! Merry Christmas!!! and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

from abrayla :

Are you familiar w/ this Mazzy site? http://www.mazzystar.nu/

from destroyable :

..ohh you are so beautiful, so so beautiful..

from edithelaine :

hello beauty, kaleidoscope. snow. i love you.

from orchdreamer :

I read your entry about eatting alone. it's really quite good. It reminds me of so many people, but mostly reminds me of myself. thanks. hope your have a wonderful day.

from jetlagdream :

"the backs of torn seasons . . ." i love it. norwegian wood is one of my favorites, as is after the quake, a collection of murakami's short stories, which i have just finished re-reading. i was trying to get into a.m. homes, but i can't accept that life is so empty. hope you are well. akemi

from hapapowerr :

hey. sorry i've been lacking on email skills and letter skills...which is funny because sending little notes is easier. how is the tropical weather. i am sorry i keep promising to come. i am always falling in and out of shambles.xoxo

from hapapowerr :

i do not know who i aM. it sounds really simple and stupid, but i feel like i don't. anyways, i get silly jealous when i think of all the memories you have with k. i am so silly, i know, i just like to find someone amazing and covet them and make them all mine. and maybe if they think about me obsessively i can feel okay.

from pixie-never :

your poems make me think of castanets and clapping hands, of sometimes tears, of tambourines and little girls tracing circles in the dust

from jetlagdream :

hi michelle, thank you for the note. i always enjoy reading your words, and i hope that you are well. take care, akemi

from pixie-never :

Thank you, says she shyly. There is such power to your words. I read your past entries and see you hesitate, question your ability. These may just be a few words from a kind-of-small girl, but extracts and your poems are written in my notebooks beside Sylvia Plath and Francesca Lia Block.

from pixie-never :

i read your entries until my shoulders cramp and i see hearts and salmons around your words

from soillsich :

The same thing happened to me once before. The odd things is that the people you have listed are still able to see that you've listed them as a favourite, but the main list appears as though it was completely erased.

from seethingblue :

MY FAVORITE DIARIES WERE ERASED! gone! vanished! poof! (what is going on????)

from edithelaine :

i miss you, my nest, my soothingness.

from edithelaine :

psst, yoko ono is showing her installations through january 26th in miami. do you want to come? you are a needlepoint of beauty and perfection, you sew up my lips pretty.

from gotmedown :

i've got a rilo kiley ring, you wanna join it? i'd be happy. hop.

from ydandelions :

beautiful words drop from your soul.

from lunabella :

i like you

from runawayfever :

that is a grande idea. finding the bonsai farm part is my favorite. xoxo

from runawayfever :

hi i just wanted to say that i really liked your last entry. you write beautifully. xoxo

from edithelaine :

you are a soft crocus flower and i love you.

from edithelaine :

my secret secret to you is that i secretly (if i ever had a girl child)would name her ninfa marina. you have ESP, you can read my mind and i know you can because you know i miss you, i miss you.

from moonrattles :

it's been too long since i've seen bladerunner, really. too sad, such a wonderful movie. when i think about the end, i think of Harrison letting the replicant live because it had just saved his life bc it (he) realized life was too preccious a thing to take from someone, and the running away with Rachel and not caring about not knowing how long their time would be, because he loved her that much. Such a glorious fucking movie.

from runawayfever :

Aww I would come, but I live in boston. Thanx for the invite though. :) I like the songs: when songbirds sing, rasberry water, until next time, & steps in sand. Check them out or download them. I think you'd maybe like them. They're cutesy, "i miss you" songs. Tell me what you think. xoxox

from runawayfever :

you're sweet. it's funny, i feel like no one reads it. thanks for the compliment. i like your diary a lot too. xoxo

from singingcynic :

ask and you shall receive. and femmeproject will return soon too, i promise.

from blackcat14 :

happy birthday, i love your diary and i think min woo is hot too ^.^

from ydandelions :

oh michele!I'm so feeling with you.and I thought my life was too ...up, to be beared any longer. i want to take you in my arms, and I'm doing that:mentally.I hope you have someone special with you whose caresses are not just imaginary.

from aware :

I have been distant- but your words are as clear and as close to my heart as ever

from bendme :

absolutly gorgeous. i wish i could hear you whisper all the things you'd like to feel. i could listen to you tell stories of far-away places forever.

from cuillin :

Beautiful.

from plastic8tree :

thanks.

from singingcynic :

m - should i change your femmeproject link to your other diary, or leave it as seethingblue? let me know what you want.

from palebycmprsn :

hello. i know you wrote you had given up on this diary. i was wondering if you still were writing for the public. i read your page regularly and it brings a missing element of beauty in details to my life. my email is [email protected] me know if you like and may sweetness find you

from hapapowerr :

your words are special novels i find in the back of the library, coveting them close to my chest, they will take you far, and not away from me.

from hapapowerr :

i like your birdseed words, those cakes. i sent that negative with a bit shyness...but you understood it all so clearly.

from ydandelions :

Michele, loved your latest entry (25th of april). Although I cannot relate to it, I can SO understand you! Fell bonded love,Marnie

from hapapowerr :

hello doll. wow, you have quite a fanclub from diaryland, it all sounds exciting...all the flattery and understanding, right? i was just thinking of you, hoping things are great----is it really hot over there? its crazy and humid out here in ny. i wish you lived in ny or i lived in fl, and we could just have a guaranteed friend to be with every friday night---and we could honestly tell each other everything we had on our minds---and we could look into each others faces like mirrors---of physical makeup and the physical--mental related understanding. yes, yes. one day, .....you are great and i really love you.

from livealoof :

THATS [email protected]

from livealoof :

WE SHOULD GO TO A HOPE SANDOVAL SHOW TOGETHER, JUST GIVE ME AN E-MAIL AT [email protected]. + i LOVE YOUR DIARIES, AND THAT PIC OF BJORK IS GREAT

from aware :

well spoken- i got jack done today...

from jonasty :

i think your poetry is really really pretty!! yay!!

from hapapowerr :

hello darling. your recent diary update is very poetic. you are very important to me,...xoxo mrb

from soulsurvivor :

you and yellowbindi are the most beautiful. damn. damn...

from greer04 :

ahh! i have found someone who shares the same love for hope sandoval and the warm machines. <3.

from livealoof :

wow, your entry on Feb. 7 was the first entry I've read. It honestly gave me a sense of serenity. I also enjoy listening to Hope Sandoval, been a fan since I first heard her in 1994. Oh, well, your entry was great, I can relate to the things you are experiencing.

from livealoof :

from singingcynic :

blue -

people like us find eachother. if we can know eachother through words, what's to stop talking in "real" life? nothing is beyond possibility. remember, i will offer whatever comfort i can. even if it's just reading. being read.

from ydandelions :

hey, this is blackcoffee, this is ydandelions, it's me. I just wanted to tell you that I love you for what you are writing. The way you write. The things you say.I don't know anybody who can write in such a way. German people put down their words so rigidly. So uneasy. I don't know why. Perhaps the english language is not something which we can use so smoothly as you do. But even in German language:I don't know anybody who writes that way you do. it reminds me of smooth and creamy ice cream and downy feather pillows and "chocolat", this fairy-tale like style, this misty words which feel so cotton-wool-like. LIke in winter times where the recently fallen snow absorbs every sound and puts the whole world on hold.

from aware :

It's official- I'm hogging this page... I loved the last paragraph of today (2-2)... it really caught me... remember- you're your own worst critic...

from aware :

beautifully, beautifully written as always

from aware :

i know how first weeks can be- i hope things get better from here... it's all perspective

from singingcynic :

blue - i hope that what you said about what your diary has become isn't an indication that you are going to stop writing in it. i know how it feels to be in a rut and feel like there is nothing around worth looking at. email me, IM me, anything.

from singingcynic :

where have you gone? i feel lonely without your diary frequently updated.

from aware :

hi blue- i hope i'm not hogging your notes page- i got your email the other day and was overjoyed... i had such an intense feeling of peace (contradictory?) that i just wanted to cry.. cry because life is so short and so beautiful and frustrating... cry because i can't seem to open my eyes wide enough to take everything in- to be aware... thank you for your words... for everything... keep in touch- if you ever need a real person to vent to just say the word.... -contagious peace aware

from aware :

i just wanted to say how honored i am to be on your favorites list- how beautiful i find your words and your honesty about life- everything. i sent you an email when i first discovered it but i'm not sure it went through. anyway- you're a beautiful person and i love the way you find your words... i turned on my message receiving thing, so feel free to drop me a line- peacepeace

from warmblankets :

sometimes in front of the crisp clean air of winter solstice i still can't help but feel mad about something. maybe sometimes small. maybe sometimes big. something completely out of reach? but it's there. and it haunts the purest beauty known to man. words.

from singingcynic :

your longing for something to hold on to, a souvenir of the past, and your simultaneous desire to be new and begin again - both sentiments resonate with me. how can they not? what are we (writers) doing anyway but creating momentos of ourselves, capturing moments and keeping them forever? at the same time, writing is creation, it's building something new, even if it's about the past. that is why this is beautiful. keep it up, seethingblue. i like cherry coke. but it does not even begin to compare to the joy that is wild cherry pepsi.

from katsigh :

Some people are given a gift. The ability to wrap themselves around words and make them their own and at the same time touch the inner core of someone. You have that gift. Thank you for sharing it. =^..^= - making my way around another puddle.

from centered :

it's lovely, really.

from yellowbindi :

don't be afraid of catching the bus...you will catch your bus! :)

from ilovecabbage :

I have cola flavoured gummi lobsters! nahh but sorry I'm more of a Krautrock reference than a Cabbage Patch Kids one... thanks for sending me a note anyway! I like your diary better than my own, you have that amazing skill to write complete sentences and choose adjectives like they are the most important words because they are. OK what am I crapping on about...

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