messages to shewholies:
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from degausser :
Thanks for sharing that Buddy Wakefield quote. I looked it up and it immediately became one of my favorite poems.
from degausser :
Also, I'm totally freaked out by pregnancy. And babies in general. Procreating is not on my bucket list.
from degausser :
My most-thought work thought is definitely, "Are you fucking with me?" I also regularly have to restrain myself from screaming, "STOP TALKING"
from dangerspouse :
That doesn't mean anything unless we know what size the cupcake is, cupcake.
from newschick :
Ha, thanks. somebody's gotta be real about this whole baby thing. (ugh)
from dangerspouse :
I guess if you shared your Toblerone with them afterwards it would have been justifiable.
from dangerspouse :
That poor, poor mouse. (Did you at least save it for stock?)
from loveherwell :
that sounds a thousand times better than a "typical" romance.
from loveherwell :
i really needed to hear that. thank you.
from loveherwell :
i totally don't get that a lot, wow. thank you. that's so nice! much love and sunshine to you as well, darling. <3
from degausser :
Oh man, that's a lot of cool points. I appreciate it. And Iím delighted to hear that I am not the only person outstaying their welcome in a 2 year program. The worst is when I run into people I havenít seen in awhile, and they ask how my Associate(or Bachelorís!) went and Iím like, ďHaha nervous laughter, still there! How charmingly dysfunctional of me, thanks for asking.Ē My boyfriend of nearly 4 years refuses to acknowledge that I can be really horrible sometimes. I literally read my transcript to him once (W, W, W, F, F, A, A, W, F, etc.) and I still think he thought I was being hard on myself. And thank you for the compliments on my brain, it needs all the help it can get. I look forward to reading more from another Gogol Bordello fan who has college troubles. There just arenít enough of us around.
from degausser :
I just wanted to give you a big internet thumbs up on posting a Gogol Bordello video. I adore them.
from and-the-way :
I've always wished that I could have a video of my entire life. Every waking moment. That way I could go back and watch the past.
from and-the-way :
i get jealous regarding my guy friends, too. it's like i'm the kid sister who doesn't approve of any girl they go out with.
from in19seconds :
Ha ha! Guess what? I love you too! You remind me so much of myself it's uncanny.
from theways :
i'm so happy for you :)
from rest-of-it :
hahaha! thanks! my diary is stuck on that entry for some reason, so anytime anyone looks at it, that's what they see. thanks a lot, diaryland!
from and-the-way :
why can't there be more people in the world like that?
from atwowaydream :
"I took the batteries out of the smoke detector and put them in my vibrator. " you reckless little horndog, you.
from and-the-way :
i laughed out loud because of your 02/28/11 post :)
from theways :
i've been away from home for a while now, and there's no winter where i am. i think this is the thing i miss the most from home... the quietness of winter.
from layla-boyd :
Get rid of the parasite that sleeps in your bed..he isn't worth your time of day. He sounds like a sleazebag. Think, has there ever been a moment when you haven't been in a relationship? Has it gotten to the point where you would rather be with a toxic douche instead of alone with your thoughts? You sound intelligent so stop letting someone mooch of you..off your intelligence and passion for life! No matter how hard he tries it won't rub off on him. Any guy who resorts to physical violence is no man..and it sounds like that's what he did..:( excuse my emoticon use.
from xnamehere :
*HUGS* don't do that, you have such a beautiful mind.
from omfggwtf :
love this :) xo.
from dinahsoar :
Somehow fell into your diary and related to the idea of always having a lover, but a "soul-friend" harder to find. I have one friend like that, but she's been kinda prickly lately and I find myself egg-walking. So that's not of the "soul". I could literally say "Always a bride, never a bridesmaid". I've always had a man in my life, but not always someone who "got" me. I love your candid observations & insights.
from offbymyself :
I definitely understand how you feel about the 'soul friends'.
from theways :
hugsxx. im just an email away if you ever want to vent or talk about anything :)
from kabukicharms :
I suppose itís a reptilian brain sort of reaction. Can I mate with it? I donít know. Should I flee? Not sure. Better hedge my bets and mount it, and/or beat it with a rock. My caveman ancestors I think would be proud.
from theways :
i get you sister, i feel the same way.
from amazinfuckup :
Thank you for your kind words. :)
from theways :
thank you so much :)
from theways :
:)
from ceilings :
i've seen your pictures. you are beautiful. i've read your words. you are smart. you fuckin reek of potential and a magical glimmer, there is a ferocity in you, a spark, and i hope you never let it go out.
from alienamiss :
Mm -- rockin' Eternal Sunshine image. That's one of the few movies I'd seen (when I did) that really got to me. Fuckin' A.
from atwowaydream :
it always seem like their eyes are some sort of blue in the beginning. . . you should really be proud of yourself, forgiving and being forgiven are two of the bravest things in the world. i wish you only good things.
from ceilings :
you deserve to be happy. life is exciting and cool and awesome, you just need to get out there. you're stuck in a rut. i was too for a long time but i think i'm starting to climb out. climb out with me and lets dance in the streets! <3
from avox :
I want to read your diary but you've no foreword/back buttons to make your older entries accessible...
from ceilings :
i can tell you it would have been amazing to have a grrrl like you as my therapist rather than the fuckwits i got. good luck with your ambitions. i'm doing the school thing too, its weird, but im trying. (i have an essay outline that was due a week ago that i havent done.. but i have a beer in my hand so that will have to keep waiting lol.)
from ceilings :
hey girl, where you been? life's got you, eh? anyway i hope you can submit something to my zine!
from ceilings :
im making a new compilation zine and i would love to put a piece of yr writing in it. let me know if yr interested and i'll explain about it. <3
from ceilings :
i'm loving it. i remember when i felt like that and i'm trying to get it back. thanks for reminding me. <3
from spires :
i thought of you today when i put a flower in my hair.
from notefairy :
Casey Jones, you better watch your speed.
from atwowaydream :
Children should be invincible-- and I hope that she lives forever and ever amen.
from theways :
loving the new layout. eternal sunshine's great.
from theways :
"I break my own heart so nobody else has to." such a clever sentence, i love it.
from ceilings :
california! i wanna make it there someday. <3
from ceilings :
the mistake is a douchebag. you are a goddess. the other girl is a replacement but you can't replace a goddess. all those things that make you "difficult" also make you irreplaceable. and you, you will move on like a star, you'll shine and you'll shoot right across the sky and people will make wishes on you, which you can grant or not, but your own will come true. <3
from ceilings :
i'm in the same boat as you. recently single and looking for some good hard dick. i've had two encounters now since the ex, they were mediocre. they were both previous fucks though. i think i need new boys. i'm going to have to find some. good luck with yours. the amazing sex is out there! <3
from atwowaydream :
The worst thing about depression is all of the damn "depression hurts, but you don't have to" commercials that come on when you're feeling like shit. Sweetie, I've been there, sometimes I still am there; but if there's anything you can learn from depression, it really teaches you how strong you are.
from theotherman :
i'm so sorry, girl. *hugs*
from vandelay :
I know what you mean about Major Depressive Disorder. And you're right about dogs being a good judge of character as well. Sorry, I randomly started reading here.
from englishsucks :
its good that you're moving on even though it still bothers you and it still hurts but it'll mend evenually. :) ♥
from ceilings :
even if it's strange because i'm a stranger, i care about you. you are a vibrant person, an inspiration and i wish you nothing but the best. <3
from atwowaydream :
Every so often, it feels good to take out the trash. Especially when it's accumlated to 270 lbs. I hate to be cliche and say you deserve better, but somewhere inside, you know you do.
from ceilings :
it's the right decision. the pain will pass, it will really hurt but once it's gone you'll feel amazing. and you'll thank yourself every day. good luck. <3
from atwowaydream :
maybe someone that is thrown away is thrown away for more than just the hypothetical trash? Maybe you are certainly worth more.
from chalkstain :
your note made me feel almost epic. happy oh nine, sunshine.
from ceilings :
thank you darling <3
from atwowaydream :
from one who is mad to live and to be saved, to another. . . thank you so much. Life is a tricky little fucker, no?
from dogbones :
Want to draw attention to your diary? Check me out! I can help! If you don't then ignore this note and just think of it as a Kudos ;)
from theotherman :
i wanted to say i rarely have the time with hus and baby to read here, but when i do i always love what you write. i love the latest.. so true... secrets are your life. freakin' love the wisdom you share. you have a lot to offer the world, girl.
from doctorkaysen :
I don't think you know how much it means to me to hear that. It's inspiring, thank you!
from errantnights :
hrm
from annanotbob :
Those few words you used to describe the festival conjured it up perfectly in my mind. Fab. xxx
from for-you-only :
Of course you COULD dance in the fields forever, but would you feel good about yourself if you did? Probably not. I'm getting serious about making than step into a community college as well.
from poolagirl :
Would you believe this? I was born in Le Mars, raised in Remsen, and went to Briar Cliff in Sioux City. Back in the Stone Age. LOL!
from poolagirl :
I found you via a common thread on Diaryland. I think we might have something in common. I grew up in Northwest Iowa. Small world, eh?
from theways :
oh well that's good. because longing is the worst.
from laydi-rayne :
wow, you must have just favourited me... becoz I only wrote that stuff about "choc boobies" a few minutes ago! :D
from lonelywife :
thank you. thank you for your words. i am dying here. the words you typed....no matter how small you think they might be....saved me tonight. thank you. i'm lost and broken. i'm trying to take the next step....it's so difficult...
from theways :
dead like me is love. so is the title of your last entry.
from ceilings :
goddamn i love you. "Whenever Boyfriend makes me cry, I have to remind myself that he is nothing. He is simply the latest in a long line of men who have made me cry." don't forget that, don't you dare. he won't be the last, he doesn't deserve to be. you are glorious, i knew it from the first word i read of yours, you're brilliant. you shine like a star. and you see, "some boys take a beautiful girl and hide her away from the rest of the world, i wanna be the one to walk in the sun cuz girls just wanna have fun" ... we have this lust for life, for experiences, but the boys just want to hold on because they don't know if they will ever hold something so beautiful again, but we KNOW we will, we know because we are guns of Ishtar, we are those beautiful complicated girls. its just attractive, and the boys and girls just appear out of the woodwork. you're so pretty and i love that picture of you! i sense a change, a good one, in you. i think its time. and i wish we lived in the same city because i would totally seduce you and make you forget allllll about your boy problems. keep your chin up, gorgeous.<3
from theways :
oh, thank you dear! i love reading you also. i dig your honesty.
from theotherman :
very smart. i was in a hurry. now i wished i would have waited.
from theotherman :
thank you. now if only i knew what that was?
from ceilings :
i love you.
from elliestuff :
Really, some insightful stuff. I wish I could speed clean my house.
from ceilings :
love right back atcha sweetheart <33333
from ceilings :
"with all the drugs in the world you can't shut up that girl" -courtney love
from ceilings :
i'm learning too.. i dont know a chord.. ok maybe c... maybe d... but i'm learning the penatonic scale which is fun and easy... listen, i want to send you my zine if yr interested. you should get into zines!... and take care of yourself babe, i understand the binge, but just keepo some common sense in there and remember to STAY ALIVE... we need you in this world. <3
from ceilings :
do you play guitar? ps, i'm loving the painted tits!
from ceilings :
go for it! chicks are hot!!
from brandnewchi :
When the April rains stop and the May flowers come I'll be there at the crossroads to hold your hand again.
from ceilings :
mmmmmmmmmmmmmspring. ps. learn guitar!!!
from ceilings :
happy birthday baby.
from ceilings :
you're so fuckin smart. and yes it is settling for less thanyou deserve, i've done it myself so much so many times, it's like life is just too much for us crazygirls and so we end up in these relationships like safety blankets. but remember more was meantlove, for you in this life. and remember, yes, it feels good to have the emptiness filled with warm love, but really, reallyreally it's the emptiness that drives us, the hole in us, and it makes us crazy, insane, depressed but if you can learn to chanel it, use it, you'll find your life is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen. it won't be safe and warm all the time, sometimes it will, but you won't be caged, you'll have to fly, and that's the scary part and that's the best part. <3
from ceilings :
come on hun! don't have a baby now! i hate to say the old thing but you're wayyyy too young. you'll be an amazing mom when you do it. and you'll love it. but not now, and not just cuz it would be "bad for baby" but because it would be bad for you. you need to live your own life, find yourself, all that shit we have to do when we're young, go crazy have fun all that. having a baby would be a distraction, a way to lie to yourself. because obviously something is making you unhappy, a baby would just gloss over that with new troubles. (and hun, be careful with your pills, get fucked but mixing ups and downs, well, just make sure you're really careful and you have someone with you, i don't want you to die. might not mean much from a stranger but i'd be sad if i couldn't read you any more, you really are a gem. so trake care of yourself. your life is incredible, valuable, dont fuck with that.) <3
from ceilings :
you are beautiful. don't forget it. you have a certain something about you that i like a lot.
from ceilings :
leave your boyfriend. chase the love you won't have or find a new one to chase. i don't thinks drugs are the problem so much as settling. i can tell from your writing that you're incredible, you're smart and special, you're one of "those girls" ... you know, there's more to you. and thats just so attractive. you with your poetic mind will find many a boy to break their hearts and let them break yours. you don't need this guy even though he makes you feel warm and safe. the damage that settling for less than you deserve is more then you'd think. i know, i stayed with mr safe for wayyy too long. <3

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