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messages to shot-of-tea:
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from randomrabbit :
I use the exact same logic of only buying healthy stuff so I can't eat crap. Unfortunately the chap I share a house with does buy crap so I eat that instead, so you still get fat and also have your house mate banging on at you for eating all their food. So, erm, conclusion: buy unhealthy food.
from outer-jessie :
Aw, you can do it Claire! Head up, chin up, spirits up, and all that! Yeah it does suck sometimes, and you do have to get the smackdown about getting things done in a timely manner at LEAST once before it kicks in, but you can totally swing it. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming...
from stepfordtart :
You can cook mince from frozen, even if it is a solid brick o' mince. Heat the pan up, chuck the brick in. When its gone 'sizzle' for a bit, turn it over and scrape off all the cooked bits while the other side is going 'sizzle'. continue this sizzle/scrape/turn thingy until its thin enough to hack into manageable lumps with the wooden spoon. Keep stirring it about in the hot pan, it'll thaw/cook pretty quick. Once its all crumbly/brown/cooked commence spag bol-ing Bit tiresome but better than eating cack (or poptarts) for tea. As long as its beef mince you wont even poison anyone. enjoy. s x
from outer-jessie :
For what it's worth, you come across as mature and self-assured in ways you never have before. It sucks to outgrow things that once meant so much to you, but it's part of the process and in time it does make sense. I'm not saying it's over with you two or anything, but I do think that you can love someone as much as ever yet realize that you aren't meant for each other.
from stepfordtart :
Why am I just a little disappointed that you dont ACTUALLY angrily spit at each other? I ave visions of you, on opposite sides of a (quite large) room, going "PPPfftoooey!", "Yeh? Well, HhhhWIkkkk...TUUUUH!". Oh, that would be SO cool. s x
from outer-jessie :
Oh man, some random-impersonal-screenshot of a friend I am; I didn't even wish you a happy birthday on your special day. In my defense, I didn't really think you needed one from me. In fact I still don't, yet here I am anyway, because the people in your other notes gave me a peer-pressury feeling. I really only came to reiterate Mr. Kyle's sentiment (we're not on a first-name basis, he and I) but also remind you that the trust thing is *R's* issue, not yours, stemming from *his* insecurities. He needs to buck up, relax and let go, or else. (Or else what? I don't know, shhhh.)
from yellow-ninja :
Happy belated birthday! I thought 19 was a bummer of a birthday as well, but at least you had a lovely day!
from skinnylizzie :
Well I'm rubbish and totally missed your birthday, but I'm still going to say happy belated birthday anyway. Do you get a discount at your new job? If so, let that soothe you through the dark days (unless you work in Millets. Which is fine if you like tents and thermal underwear I guess) of retail; worryingly I am starting to think that only vodka can start soothing me nowadays. This is a bad sign. Also, I would choose a silent disco over late-notice working any hour of any day.
from theswordsman :
Happy Birthday, Claire. I was just trying to figure out how many years I've said it now...I hope one of the jobs turns out to be painless and fun. A newspaper column sounds like a great start to your literary career. It seems you're ready to stop holding back a bit and let the world catch a glimpse of your true potential. Enjoy!
from sunbeams100 :
Like Zoe, I felt the need to be biased and say YAY ANCIENT GREEKS! They are a fucked up bunch, so that module should be fun, providing your taught the right stuff. Also - in my first week, I had *3* of those 'how to read' lectures - it gets better, don't worry. :) Also, 4 hours is fine, what kind of first year are you? Or are you not taking naps? I advice naps, they got me through first and second year. :D
from skinnylizzie :
I know I need to go to bed now, because when I read the bit about your extra module, I thought it said Ancient Greek, and I truly believed I was going to have to come down there and shake my fist threateningly at you to put you off it. Thankfully I don't, and it's groovy gravy, because the ancient Greeks were hilarious. Not that I'm at all biased or anything you understand, nor am I living out my student days through you now. No pressure.
from stepfordtart :
I'll admit to a little pang of worry when I saw your name in red - I thought "ooh, I hope she's OK". Being a mum clearly doesnt stop at worrying about one's OWN kids, I have to extend it to take in cyber teens I have never even met, too, it seems! Glad you seem to be taking so much in your stride! s x
from stepfordtart :
Oooh, you would TOTALLY rock on a uni newspaper. Im too old to say 'totally' like that, arent I? *looks sheepish*. s x
from outer-jessie :
Um, the experiences, not the bit of potato. Although that too.
from outer-jessie :
Bravo Claire! Eat it up!
from theswordsman :
You should check out the gold hoard once you've recovered from Freshers http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/09/24/staffordshire.uk.gold.hoard/index.html
from stepfordtart :
Wishing you the very best of things (and no shit up the side of the toilet - I laughed far too much at that line). s x
from theswordsman :
Saved By the Bell - The College Years. Godspeed.
from strawberrri :
enjoy it - it'll be exciting and wonderful :)
from buffylass :
Good luck my love! Man, you're making me all nostalgic about when I was a student. Don't worry, you definitely won't be the freak of the flat - they're usually very easy to spot and drop out by Christmas. Have a fab time! xx
from skinnylizzie :
Muchos good luck m'dear! Not that I think you'll need it in the slightest. And the real joy of being at university, the one that nobody tells you about, is the fact that you now have two wardrobes and two rooms to keep your expanding clothes collection in, hurrah! (you're kind of buggered when you graduate though - most of my clothes live on the outside of my wardrobe on hangers nowadays, boo). Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, I hope it goes well! I am actually really quite excited about reading about your mad life as a student so go forth and have adventures quickly...
from outer-jessie :
Good luck, Claire! Don't worry, it'll be awesome! At the risk of sounding like an unconvincing parent, you are going to make friends in a snap and they're going to love you!
from stepfordtart :
I think the one in the hat and the beard is my husband. Dont worry, he's harmless. s x
from strawberrri :
the blind leading the blonde. classic. you have such an amazingly bright future :)
from theswordsman :
Time for a birthday countdown?
from theswordsman :
Are you unveiling a spiffy new diary for Claire: The Uni Years?
from punklola :
I cannot agree more! No more supermarkets, please! Perhaps a trendy clothes shop, or GAME or HMV, something cool for once. Somerfield drained all my patience for people in supermarkets, although now I am much nicer to the people that work there... I guess there's an upside to everything.
from portlypete :
Student-bum has it spot on. I remember the first week (I do have a looooong memory) consisting of chasing round the city like a blue-arsed fly registering for this, that and fuck knows what. But then everyone's in the same boat. My advice - go out with your new mates on the first night and get rat-arsed, and don't sign up (in a fit of enthusiasm) for every society known to man during Fresher's Week - plenty of time for that. Then enjoy every minute of your time there. You'll make new friends who'll stay with you for years to come. I sincerely hope you have a fantastic time in Brum and, if your sofa's blue now, I'm sure it will be pizza-vomit-russet in a year from now.
from student-bum :
Ooh I remember this, it's the worst bit, trust me. You'll probably have a low-level panic right up until you move into your flat - but as soon as you meet your flatmates and get the first night over and done with, it'll be so much easier! People telling me to 'enjoy' it didn't help in the slightest so I won't say that to you, just that in a few weeks' time you'll wonder why you were ever worried xxx
from strawberrri :
also, keep anything of value on you at ALL TIMES. even when you sleep, have it by your head or even the bottom of your sleeping bag by your feet. sorry, just big sisterly kinda instinct kicking in. but don't worry, it will be amazing!
from strawberrri :
you will be grateful to jade once you get to the reading fest and don't have to camp 18 miles (ok, slight exaggeration) from the arena unlike the latecomers. take a whole loo roll, baby wipes and remember where you've pitched your tent. have fun :)
from theswordsman :
Why were the swans lurking behind bushes? Oh well, I guess that's why they've got the long, curved necks. I read once that people don't believe that other people are more moral or whatever than they are, so if they're capable of cheating, or stealing, they think everyone is. It lets them get away with the "everyone does it" attitude, like when everyone in my Finance course (but me) exchanged contact info before the take-home, do it alone final exam. Maybe that's the problem with R. Take care.
from buffylass :
YAY YOU! xx
from smashthegas :
WOO! And of course: HOO! I shall raise a glass in your honour when I get drunk tomorrow night, dear!
from outer-jessie :
CONGRATULATIONS! That is so awesome, well done! So proud of you for getting into your first choice!
from sunbeams100 :
ABB is brilliant Claire, I am very impressed with your skills! :) And Birmingham is meant to be a brilliant Uni and very beautiful, from what I've heard. Prepare yourself, Uni is incredibly hectic but the best thing to ever happen to you usually. :D
from strawberrri :
BRILLIANT!
from skinnylizzie :
Congratulations! They are some bitchin' results (and yes, I did just say bitchin', I felt the situation deserved it). Enjoy your night out tonight, your diary never fails to make me laugh so what your life as a student will be like, I can only imagine!
from strawberrri :
all the luck in the world for tomorrow claire! :) </positive smiley face> x
from buffylass :
Massive good luck! xx
from vintagejunk :
Don't worry, you're not alone. My sister who's your age loves solitaire, it's something that I've never understood. :P Maybe it's a 1990 thing? (Hope I got the year right!)
from skinnylizzie :
Haha thank you my little chumette, I shall do my level best to not turn into a total headcase. By the way, in the spirit of tradition, I totally forgot to ask you what you thought of the last Georgia Nicolson book?
from outer-jessie :
I know! How about rearranging your room! Sure, it has no meaning to the outside world, much like virtually every game of solitaire, but it can be a rewarding mission leading to a sense of accomplishment. You may even stumble across some old project you were once engaged with, and ask yourself, why did I never devote all my time to finishing this?
from outer-jessie :
If we're talking bib overalls, and I can talk you into pig tails and a piece of straw for chewing, then...wait...no.
from outer-jessie :
I think, if it is at all possible, you could actually be even more adorable with a hillbilly hole in your mouth. *thumbs up*
from legolass :
of course, my username is the obvious (legolass) password - cheesecake (YUM) but i don't update here much anymore, having callously abandoned diaryland for blogspot!! but i still keep up with my reading over here of course xx
from stepfordtart :
I am a mum. I write perfectly good texts. I hve never texted 'l8r' in my life. Nor 'LOL'. I write proper English texts, with punctuation and grammar and big long words. It drives people mental. I like that. s x PS Did you remember to feed the God?
from legolass :
hello, you don't know me as i am a relatively new reader :-) i found you through skinnylizzie. just had to comment on your last paragraph - my friend and i also have the uncanny ability to turn serious, sometimes even depressing movies into something comedic - titanic, lord of the rings and benjamin button being some of ones that spring to mind. i felt very wrong laughing at titanic but when the guy hits the propeller i just couldn't help myself :-) x
from buffylass :
Ha, LOVED your entry. James's mother cannot write texts at all, so is very economical with letters and just sends ones that say, "Got there safe see soon LMX", where LMX means "Love Mum x". Which is fine, except she puts that at the end of emails too, after typing in perfect English for three paragraphs.
from strawberrri :
my mum thinks LOL means lots of love and adds it to the end of EVERY text she sends. seriously, she could send me 'a monster heron crashed into the house and it's now a pile of rubble. LOL mum x' and i would probably fall about laughing picturing her cackling in my head :)
from xxholding-on :
hey i saw you were online and i really wanted the vote/review from diaryland members towards an art contest i joined. It's a coach marketing contest and i need as many votes as i can get! I'm already in 13th out of 2700, please help me out! http://www.brickfish.com/Pages/PhotosAlbums/PhotoView.aspx?picid=975395_34070543&pid=2767347&scid=452
from smashthegas :
You played Golf, C? You are sick. Beyond all Shawshank Redemption. Haha, I'm so funny I almost laughed.
from strawberrri :
"I ranted at him that he was lying and even referred to the cardigan he was wearing as a ‘cardi of deceit’." HAHAHA!
from outer-jessie :
Cardi of deceit! Surely those three words have never in the history of humanity been used together like that. I think you have earned yourself a Garden State-esque Certificate of Uniqueness. (Uniquity?)
from yellow-ninja :
Yes, life can be quite crappy. But, at the very least, it goes on. Thanks for the note.
from theswordsman :
I think that you and your doppelganger could ne the start of a good novel.
from outer-jessie :
Goofy is definitely a compliment when it comes from people who relish and honor goofiness. I know I do, don't you? It is important that for every 5-10 self-important types, there is at least one goofy individual who does not take herself quite so seriously. (As you can clearly deduce, one goofy person is worth 5-10 regular people, so it is very good to be one of those. Accordingly, we have a secret club of goofy people that meets behind a Foot Locker for awkward break dancing lessons. I hereby invite you to join. The password is "Gilgamesh".)
from outer-jessie :
I am always so pleased when you update. Your goofy humor never lets me down! I am feeling a little stawky for now having two notes in a row. I seriously considered holding off on leaving this note for another time, but it was SO IMPORTANT that I just had to get it off my chest.
from outer-jessie :
Hobos or hobbies...that is a dilemma. No, I really don't have anything more substantive than that to say. Hello.
from sun-dials :
Ghostly and interesting will conquer... one day. But, in the mean time, I'll sit outside in the garden for hours on end and tell myself that I'm getting more tanned each and every day :)
from smashthegas :
You look gorgeous, darling! And you are way too much younger than me for me to say that, but still. Anyway, what was the row about? You can't tell us you had a row and then waffle on about being sick under a table. Gah!
from theswordsman :
Hi, my name is John and I'm apparently a perv for Edwardian style curly hair:( Hi John.
from sun-dials :
Oh my goodness! You look absolutely stunning in your sixth form ball picture :) And don't worry babes, you look tanned. At least you're not as ghostly as I am.
from stepfordtart :
It was a shitty thing to do (and so was telling you about it, Katy you stirrer!). But it was shitty because commenting on someones boobs is tacky and immature and moronic, not because he is a rubbish boyfriend. When he's finally let out of the kennel, tell him to grow up and have a bit of fucking decorum and then just rise above it. Being crass and a twat is something boys do. We are better creatures. He didnt cheat on you, he was just being a wanker. s x
from buffylass :
Oh chicken, have a creepy internet hug from me - the boobs question was completely out of line, and you are totally justified in your fury xx
from theswordsman :
Hi Claire. I'll just send you a pat on the shoulder from three thousand miles away, wish you the best of luck on exams, and hope that brilliant things happen to you the rest of the week. Take care. John
from stepfordtart :
I am SO stealing 'Pit of Ming'. It has many and several uses in my world. Thanks for that. s x
from portlypete :
I know there's a word for the study of elections which eludes me at the moment due to inprop-whatever imbibation of alcoholic substances. Anyway, my point is that exam exit polls are even more suspect than those taken at government polling stations. If I remember correctly, they bore absolutely bugger all relationship to the final results when I was taking exams. To jovial twats everywhere I say "eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may be studying at the University of Bolton". For you, Birmingham or Leicester. And God help 'em!
from skinnylizzie :
Muchos good luck for tomorrow (and the others as well) m'dear; I remember all too well the horror of A Levels and waking up with random dates and names running through your head in the middle of the night and thinking 'ARSE BISCUITS, SHUT UP BRAIN'. Or something to that effect. So anyway, yes, good luck!
from stepfordtart :
Revising is rubbish. May it all click into place for you on Friday, dear. s x
from raven72d :
plans for summer wickedness?
from stepfordtart :
Guinness turns your poo black, too. Just thought you might like to know. s x
from strawberrri :
i say look out brum! but leicester rocks too (i went there!) and aren't overly picky about grades...i needed ABB to study history, and there ended up people on my course who got CDD. but you're so, so bright and the fact that you're doing proper revision puts you firmly on the path to success. good luck - work hard then ENJOY SUMMER xx
from outer-jessie :
Go Claire, GO! Kick some examination ass!
from student-bum :
In Edinburgh I saw three Japanese tourists with surgical masks on. I suspect their travel advisor had been a bit over-zealous in their recommending they take precautions against the KILLER SWINE FLU. Yeah I think it's all a load of bollocks too.
from student-bum :
You are a GENIUS. Why didn't I think of that?!
from smashthegas :
Never underestimate the coolness of cars. I used mine to impress, haha. Yeah, Im a dumbass dude, I know. But there is an intelligent part of me in here somewhere. Possibly.
from student-bum :
Do I think things would be different? Absolutely. But I'll tell you what would happen - either a) fuck all, or b) I'd get my heart broken. And I know this with absolute certainty by the way he's treating me (and, from what I hear, I'm not the first) while he has a girlfriend. It's kind of the worst time for it to happen as I'm on my period so I'm a bit bonkers anyway, in the whole pushing-Colin-away bit again like back in January. Sigh. But I read the 'leave your stuff at the foot of my bed one' to Kirsty and Graeme today and they both said on the strength of that I need to keep away from him. This will be hard seeing as we're working together Saturday night. Strewth. xxx
from sun-dials :
I am SO glad that you despise the weird mullet thing as much as I do. I was honestly worried that I was the only one :/
from student-bum :
Your entry reminded me of the time I drove Colin to a stupid black-tie dinner he had to go to and he made me drop him off round the corner because "I don't want to be seen getting out of a Micra". HARUMPH. Ungrateful bastard. Is Rory planning on buying a car? If so, what kind? *inner car geek coming through*
from skinnylizzie :
He is delish with knobs (oo-er) on, but is it an acceptable crush to go public with yet? I just don't know, I think High School Musical is still too fresh in everybody's minds...but have you seen him topless?! Phwoar!
from stepfordtart :
Ooh, have you seen the youtubery of the bloke 'signing' to Natale Imbruglia's "Torn"? I feel it may appeal to your Lyrical Dancing side. s x
from strawberrri :
£25 - that's not that cheap! when i was your age i could get pissed on a fiver in wetherspoons (a selection of alcopops at £1.09) get free entry to a club with a free drink and then stumble the 2.5 miles back to my house with my best friend. ah, good times... please do save something for uni :)
from strawberrri :
LMAO! though to be fair i did use the words c**t, m**herf**king and p!ss. i assure you there's no Pr0n so do come visit again soon, we like having you!
from stepfordtart :
*laughs* I promise I wont, even if you beg me to. s x
from skinnylizzie :
Wasps are actually the devil's insect, what purpose do they serve anyway? One landed on my thumb once at uni whilst I was merrily texting away and stung me before I'd even noticed it, the little bastarding fucker. It didn't live much longer after that, but that wasn't much consolation when my thumb swelled up to twice its size. They should all just fuck off back to the fiery pits of hell, quite frankly. And on the heel subject, I'm really bad at it - I complain CONSTANTLY about how much my feet ache and I'm always putting my flat shoes on at four in the afternoon, despite their stumpifying effect. I have officially crippled myself just from working in a stupid shop.
from skinnylizzie :
Party feet, because why would you ever take off pink shoes and replace them with foldy shoes?! We all wear the party feet for our ten-hour work days and they do put off that burny feeling for a good couple of hours longer, if that helps
from yellow-ninja :
Adorable shoes! My gel insert thingies are the only things that make wearing my so-called "hooker boots" bearable all day at work (my students call them hooker boots, I call them knee high heeled boots). They're not magical by any means, but they sure help.
from student-bum :
Nice shoes, might have to see if they have them in blue... Party Feet are ok but I always think the gel could be squishier. My cousin once mistook them for boob implants. That was funny xxx
from sun-dials :
Those shoes are gorgeous. Oh! how I love New Look:) I do believe the pain will definitely be worth it.
from stepfordtart :
Pain is the price of fabulous feet. Do a couple of hours overtime and get a taxi. Ive never tried the gel things so I cant comment but those ugly verruca socks (yes, that IS what they are - putting a bow on the front and calling them by a different name wont help!)are deffo a no-no. Cant you walk barefoot, swinging the gorgeous shoes from one manicured finger if it all gets too much? Oh, and I have a fuckload of Twat Inc memory sticks. I would be happy to post some to you if you would care to email me a postal address to stepfordtartATdiarylandDOTcom. s x
from student-bum :
Claire, you've always been incredibly mature for your age and I think it's just more prominant now. Katie is a twat and you're certainly not boring - I've met you while you've been going out with R and boring is never a word I would have used to describe you. Just wait until you get to university, the people you meet there will be much more like-minded and accepting! xxx
from stepfordtart :
Meh. How rubbish. Hope he finds something else soon. s x
from portlypete :
Congrats on the exam result. You'd have to think that, if an unbiased examiner can stretch to an A, you surely ought to be able to scrape another A in your course work. As for teachers who polish their pupils' s*** till it gleams: that's a tricky one. Just because "every other f***** is doing it" (i.e. basically cheating); does that make it right? Mmm......... Welcome to the real world! So, don't expect Jaffa Cakes at your work hearing. Be thankful if you get a Rich Tea. p.s. The examining boards aren't totally stupid though - they know what goes on.
from buffylass :
I completely agree with your relationship stance - things will either work or they won't. Distance shouldn't affect anything, though that's not to say that distance isn't a complete pain in the arse. R seems completely lovely though, so I reckon you'll be fine xx
from stepfordtart :
Yes, I do, actually. Hurry up. Hope you have a spiffing time - Im still undecided about RB. He's either a bit of a God or a total knob. I think if I was a bit younger Id think he was a God and if I was a bit older Id think he was a knob. Im too midle aged for Russell Brand. How depressing. s x
from student-bum :
The word 'Prugg' made me snort in a most unattractive manner. Also, I feel your pain re: the weight gain... I could drop a stone and look amazing. Alas, my body quite likes this stone and wants to keep it - nay, add to it! Though I wonder if the nachos I had for lunch have anything to do with it xxx
from raven72d :
What's new in your life?
from stepfordtart :
Ha! Medical indignities always make for a good diary entry, dont they! Thanks for that. I think all women who work in those Condom Counter Clinics are all virgins. Thats why they're so pissy. They need a damn good shag. Mercifully for you, when they ask you how many sexual partnes you've had, you can rattle em off quite quick. I have to produce a bloody spreadsheet while Nurse Virgin twirls her moustache and looks at me like she's sucking a lemon. Meh. s x PS Primark socks are ACE!
from stepfordtart :
Hahaha! Thats the sort of thing my daughters would say (to R)! Mind you, some boys from Jooj's class once shouted out "Jooj! Your sister's well fit!" as the two of us were walking down the street. She had the good grace to look aghast as she yelled back "Dude! That's MY MUM!!!!" s x
from onlyemma :
You were in my dream the other night! I looked out of a window and your diary was on a light-up billboard like the ones at piccdilly square; scrolling across it. I tired to read it then I looked down and you were below my window at a cash machine. You had dyed black hair and a bottle of black sambuuca. It was very weird!
from stepfordtart :
The Sanny Belt thing is totally true! The ones we got from the school vending machine (as previously mentioned!) had loops so you could attach them to your sanny belt but they also thoughtfully provided the safety pins in case you didnt have a belt. As it was the 1980s, none of us had belts so we had to use the pins. Unfortunately, if your knickers were a big baggy, the weight of the sanny plus safety pins was enough to actually pull your knickers down if you werent careful! Oooh, happy days! s x
from skinnylizzie :
Okay, ignore the thumbs up comment, I am so sleep deprived that I can only apologise for this utter blither. I'm going now.
from skinnylizzie :
Cheers m'dear, he is a bit of a nob at the moment but it wasn't like I didn't know what I was letting myself in for, so que sera sera and all that jazz, I'm off to sink some chocolate! And perhaps some vodka at the weekend. And on an entirely unrelated note, seeing as I FINALLY have time to leave notes again now, BOO for the epilepsy but hurrah for the magic pills! At least you know what it is now and that it's manageable, that gets a double thumbs up from me!
from stepfordtart :
A million years ago I auditioned to be a presenter on that show. With the benefit of hindsight I am glad I didnt get it. I would have stabed them all before the first show had finished - how to you stand it? You must REALLY hate revising! s x
from buffylass :
Very glad you've got the nice epilepsy and not the horrible epilepsy xx
from student-bum :
Ah thanks for your note :) And, erm I guess yay about the diagnosis? Although it's not nice to be diagnosed with anything, at least it's getting sorted for you. I hope you don't have a problem swallowing tablets...! Ugh I can't imagine having a brain scan, I'm too claustraphobic - I'll be having blood tests on Friday which will make me cry and go shivery (thank fuck I have Fridays off) which is bad enough, my worst nightmare is that they send me off for fMRI/MRI/CAT scans, argh! But yes. Hurrah for cures! :D BTW I'm watching Hollyoaks right now... I practically feel sophisticated in my hoodie and PJ pants compared to that horrible new McQueen girl. xxx
from student-bum :
*big pressure-releasing hug* I felt exactly the same in upper sixth! Everything gets very real very quickly and it's absolutely horrible. But you can use this pressure to your advantage - so long as you don't let it take over you it is a great motivator, but as I said the trick is keeping it under control. Now would be a really good time to take up something that takes your mind off A-levels and uni. Around this time in upper sixth I was starting to drive and was training for the Samaritans, both of which gave me a bit of a mental break from A-levels. I'm not suggesting things as boring as that, do something fun instead. Preferably something that's weekly so you have something to look forward to. It might help a bit :) But if you ever want to let off steam you can always email xxx
from strawberrri :
ooh yes, year 13 is sehr stressful! you will be fine though my sweet :) as for school, don't worry too much about you being the only driving force, homework and coursework deadlines are there to ensure you do all you need to. again with you and rory, you can work out nearer the time how you're going to maintain the relationship. it's more than do-able and it'll be fun for him to come up and visit and for you to go back and see him. it'll all work out, bit by bit x
from sunbeams100 :
I just caught up on 2 months of Claire, enjoying your witty writing, then I reach the end and read POSSIBLE EPILEPSY?! :( Has there been any news love? I hope you're okay!
from theswordsman :
Merry Christmas, Claire.
from skinnylizzie :
Lord woman, the illness thing is bad and I really hope you manage to get it all sorted and cleared up very soon, but you don't half make me bloody laugh sometimes as well.
from buffylass :
Oh bloody hell, very very glad that you're okay xx
from student-bum :
Glad you're ok :) Though the alcohol clampdown must be tough... Hang in there ;) x
from portlypete :
Take care and have a fantasic holiday despite the alcohol clamp-down. I understand that it's quite possible to enjoy yourself without the aid of intoxicants, though I've no firsthand experience of this, obviously.
from strawberrri :
holy crap! glad you're ok and hope they get to the bottom of why you're having seizures. anyway, have a read around if you haven't already http://www.epilepsy.org.uk/info/alcohol.html http://www.e-epilepsy.org.uk/pages/lit/show_review.cfm?id=131
from like-winter :
Haiii =) I came across your diary the other day,you're very funny! =) Enjoy reading it,you remind me very much of my younger self haha...if you want the password to mine...just let me know! x
from avrilkiksass :
found your diary randomly- just wanted to say you sound very interesting and I'm 18 and love tea, too.
from portlypete :
"girls are weird". I'm not arguing.
from stepfordtart :
I hope he washed his hands before he phoned the X-box people. s x
from stepfordtart :
I am pathetically chuffed that I know where those lyrics come from. That is all. s x
from smashthegas :
Mmm Quality Street. Send me the purple ones? I will give you my address, heh. Smashxxx
from student-bum :
I know exactly what you mean... though this Sunday morning at around 4.30 I was helping Colin throw up, so a less relaxing and romantic morning this time.
from stepfordtart :
You can afford to buy La Senza jammies for a friend's birthday and you work a saturday job in sainsbury's. I have a middle management role in a global organisation and work an astonishingly stupid amount of hours each week and have been wearing trousers to work as I cant afford to buy any tights. Somethings not right. Straight swap? I'll wear the maroon for the chance to afford to buy people stuff! s x PS You were totally right about the bra.
from theswordsman :
If you could solve world peace while IN the shower, it would save time and make your life story even more interesting. I'm hoping that Diana from X Factor will play you in the movie.
from stepfordtart :
Ls thumb is WAY more bendy than yours! You'd make a good geetar player with a bendy thumb like that...although, you need to get a bit better at drinking first! s x
from student-bum :
Your thumb is scarily bendy. Mine is as straight as... erm, I'm trying to think of someone famous who is very stereotypically straight, but the best I can do is Daniel Craig. Hmm.
from portlypete :
I too have a new computer, but mine's only a notebook - I have no issues where size is concerned. Does yours do the neat thing where you can scroll and zoom using the touch pad with more than one finger?. My handbook (obviously printed in the land of the rising sun) explains, in 'ja-nglish', what a useful feature the "multi-finger gesture" is. I've always found that to be the case when dealing with technology.
from student-bum :
Just read your entry. If you want any inside info on Birmingham Uni this year, my good friend Hanna is a fresher there this year so if you have questions about accomodation or courses or campus or job prospects etc I can pass them on and get you answers :) Just say the word! Also, boyfriends are infuritating, it's their job. And no, the frustration doesn't pass, it just gets easier to deal with :D xxx
from buffylass :
Ohhh, see I got confused because Jade rhymes with spade. Back to my tiny cloud in the sky.. xx
from buffylass :
I thought you hated Jade?!
from outer-jessie :
And don't forget all the writing for pleasure that you do! You've been writing and entertaining the masses for years. Now I'm not sure it would help/be legally allowable, BUT should you desire to include statements re: the aforementioned entertainment, no doubt all your diaryland masses would step up. I would!
from student-bum :
Oh Jesus, I don't half go on!
from student-bum :
Ach don't worry too much about your statement. When you say you have a genuine love of literature, write about it - something like the last book you read, or your favourite book, or what you look for/don't look for in a good book. And shiz. Even write about what you're studying in English atm and what you like or don't like about it. Also mention that you read loads. Too many English students study it and don't bother reading the texts, the tutors will want to know you read for pleasure and not just because you have to. Also, if you can put yourself in for Advanced Extension English next year, DO IT. It's WELL easy (I managed to pass it with crippling period pains putting me off) and you can't revise for it. Plus you don't have to put it on your statement but it's a good backup if you don't get a grade you need, it's like a rabbit-in-a-hat thing - you just say "well I know I didn't do so well but LOOK I got a Merit/Distinction in AE English". Anyway I'll shut up now, but this is helpful if you don't know about it: http://www.ucas.com/students/startapplication/apply09/personalstatement/ Personal statements are horrible to write because you feel like such an arse but the more up yourself you are in it, the better. xxx
from smashthegas :
I've got a tattoo of a wolf on my arm. Which is way cooler. Heh. Smashxxx
from randomrabbit :
"you might want to keep that as a footnote in future" I'm fairly sure Sainsbury's rules allow you to throw tinned goods and/or robust fruits at the heads of pompous twats. And if not why not damn it.
from stepfordtart :
For my A Level Eng Lit, I foolishly poted to compare the works of Kingsley Amis and Martin Amis. After "they're father and son" I was completely fucked (with 9,996 words to go). s x
from smashthegas :
belated happy birthdays my dear! But see, thass why I think I don't go in for "proper" relationships. I enjoy bedspace too much. After a shag, I kind of just wanna kick the babe out and go to sleep. But friends inform me that is a bit rude. As for Stepfie's birthday, of COURSE her 40th was brilliant. *I* was there. </arrogant bollocks talk> Ah that was a GREAT party though. The stories I could tell... *grinz* Smashxxx
from outer-jessie :
Happy birthday, Claire! Now you are a major! This means, you are finally free to endow yourself with such titles as "Major Success" and "Major Fashion Diva" and "Major Hottie." (Or the less prestigious "Major Failure," "Major Loser," or "Major Pain in the Ass," depending on how the next eighty or so years go. But you are Claire, so surely these terms can only be applied to you fleetingly at best.) Wow! Crappiest birthday greeting ever! Amore, Jessie
from stepfordtart :
My 18th was a bit of an anticlimax, too. If im honest, 21 was a bit shitty. 30 was mostly rubbish. 40 was ACE. The only way is up, dear! Happy Birthday to ya (to paraphrase Stevie Wonder). s x
from skinnylizzie :
I haven't been able to get on the internet most of this weekend so I'm more than a little behind the times, but happy (belated) birthday m'dear! I would tell you to make good use of your right to legally drink but I'm sure you intend to do that already, which I heartily applaud.
from strawberrri :
hope you had an awesome 18th :D
from student-bum :
I'm writing this at 8pm on Saturday night, watching X Factor with Catriona. I sincerely hope you are out at this present moment getting royally fucked and LEGALLY! Happy birthday m'dear xxx
from stepfordtart :
I hate to side with your ma as that will instantly mke me lose any last vestiges of coolitude onto which I had been clinging, but I havent put my heating on yet either. At £200+/month Im staving it off as long as possible and Im just making sure my kids have nice thick pyjamas and that they wear their socks if they're thinking of going into the kitchen at all. I am rubbing my body very hard against L's in an effort to keep warm most nights (!). s x
from smashthegas :
I do hope that eighteen-dom will not be seeing anymore of these happy, wholesome and utterly boring entries being written by your now legal-to-drink self. When ar eyou going back to being bitchy and sarky? HUH?! Hehehe. Smashxxx PS V happy birthday! I'd like to say I had a great 18th, but I can't fooken remember one second of it...
from sunbeams100 :
And a third note - I have lost the ability to type...apologies!
from sunbeams100 :
Oh yeah and, very belatedly, the not so new Livejournal username is honeyed_oak and is quite angsty in parts, but feel free to hunt it down if you want. <3
from sunbeams100 :
Claaaaire! Hello. :) I just read your entry about a crazy man chargin at your friend Chrtis, and thought I should add that I too found it excessively hilarious. :D As to your recent entry- staying in and doing nothing with your boyfriend is the best thing ever. I got through many a film I wanted to watch that way. :)
from student-bum :
Aw, you're just a big ball of lovely aren't you :D Except you're not big, or a ball. Hmm. But you are lovely.
from stepfordtart :
My older daughter (nearly 13) came back from my ex-husband's house and told me conspiritorially that "I think dads got some porn stuff on his computer!". Within five seconds I had set up seperate log-ins for all family members and installed net nanny. If she thinks daddy (who's idea of perverted is not wearing nightclothes to bed) 'has porn stuff' I dont think she better go snooping round OUR harddrive. *shuddering at the thought* Glad you had a good meet-and-greet, all the d'landers Ive met have been lovely lovely people. s x
from smashthegas :
A friend of mine who worked in a supermarket used to put everything through as a pink grapefruit cos it was the only code he could remember and couldn't be arsed looking things up. Hehe. Smashxxx
from student-bum :
Check your email :) As long as you can get there I can promise a merry few hours of laughing at my ridiculously posh voice!
from strawberrri :
it IS possible. it's a massive, enormous change in your life, but it is so achievable and possible for you. and don't use excuses of being away from your family and friends from home - there are 5 (FIVE) months of holiday every uni year so you will be spending nearly half the year back there anyway. it's alright to be scared but you have to do this as you will love it so much. i am SO Team Manchester! (ok, i have succeeded in sounding even MORE bossy :D)
from student-bum :
Oh good god Claire, I have so many things to say I will probably end up crashing your notes page. Have a massive, massive hug from me for your shitty first/last day in Ibiza. Personally I now think Rory is a twat, which I know does not help and will probably make you angry, but I am RAGING on your behalf because... oooh just because. Second, go away for uni, and even if you do go to one nearer home (don't; try for Manchester, as I can totally see you enjoying yourself there) do NOT live at home. Halls are immense and a massive part of the freshers experience. Also, I do not know a single person whose relationship has survived freshers. Not a single one (well, they're all single now). Please don't let R dictate how you live your life, however much you like him. I sound like such an old person here, and a miserable one at that, but I am merely speaking from experience. Colin dictated my life for a while but this summer has shown I can have fun without him and it's ok for him to have fun without me... Relationships are complicated. Anyway, if you have replied to my email then I haven't read it as hotmail has stopped working for a bit, so I'm just off to try again...
from outer-jessie :
Put me down with a vote for "don't do it, lassie!" I suspect you knew a lot of people would say the same, but don't give up going away to school. Beyond the experience of it, you'll be amazed at how much you grow and develop as a person because of it. It's irreplaceable! I don't know much about Rory's situation (despite reading all your entries, faithfully, like clockwork), so excuse my ignorance on this point, but what is to stop him from going where you go? If you have something going on and he doesn't, pick him up and cart his ass off with you. Giving up on your dreams so early in life is a dangerous precedent, don't you think?
from strawberrri :
claire, there is nothing in the world like going to uni away from home. you had your heart set on manchester! don't throw away what will be the most amazing and fun three years of your life for a boy! living at home would NOT be the same, especially when lots of your friends have gone away and you're left feeling jealous of their tales of student larks and independence. and what if you split up? how would you feel then? if you're still together then you can take it in turns for him to go up and visit and you go down for the weekend. tori did this with her boyf and now they're married :D (apologies for this rather bossy note, but i had to air my feelings on your future!)
from buffylass :
At the risk of sounding like a boring unromantic killjoy, I would advise against going to a local uni. Living at home and going to uni is totally rubbish compared to living with randoms and finding another city to call your own, not least because your housemates inevitably end up being the most fantastic friends that you'll ever make. Not that my opinion is law in any way at all (unfortunately). Will send you the keys once I decide what they're going to be!
from theswordsman :
I'm sorry yo had such a scare, but I'm really glad that you're physically alright. I'll keep my nose out of the other thing. I'm off to see if any of the hospital folks put your bikini on YouTube. Take care.
from buffylass :
Bloody hell, it all sounds very intense. I had a random fit when I was about 12 in the middle of a History lesson, and was also whisked off to hospital and poked with various things. They told me that everyone is allowed to have one fit, which I guess is comforting. Anyway, also men are total knobcakes sometimes, but I guess the main thing is to do what makes you happy. And I'm incredibly late with this, but well done on your results!
from skinnylizzie :
Oh, men make me so mad I could just poke them all with a bear-hunting stick. He must've temporarily taken leave of his sanity to think it was a good idea, but I guess the important thing is if you wanting to be with him outweighs what happened, and what'll make you happiest. But men, pfft! I hate that stomach-going-to-drop-out-but-also-make-your-lunch-reappear feeling, it's the worst in the world, so I feel your pain. And also, hospital drama, how very scary! Glad you're okay though. (I'm still annoyed by men in general or I would attempt to be more articulate about the ordeal)
from strawberrri :
fucking hell, that must have been scary! take it easy yo'. so glad you're alright! x
from skinnylizzie :
Enjoy your holiday m'dear...I am not at all jealous, OH NO.
from student-bum :
Don't count on the honeymoon phase fizzling out... Nine months on and me and Colin are even worse than we were at the beginning. You might end up like us (which would involve sending entirely unprompted texts of 'I like you' at intervals throughout the day. That's an 'I like you' in a silly childish voice, too). Have fun in Ibiza and don't miss him too much!
from student-bum :
Yes but you are a wee slip of a thing and can thus carry it off! Obviously I have not met you (this may change on Sept 13th if you're free, I shall have to tell you about that somewhere less public!) but I imagine you're like my flatmate Hannah, who I mentioned in the entry. Not a rake, though - she is actually rake-like. Rakish, if you will. Ugh, hate being a girl sometimes. I shall email you about this Sept 13th thing presently... check your inbox!
from theswordsman :
Hey - I just read (in an article about Daniel Radcliffe) that Emma Watson got three Owls - I mean A's. You could go to the same uni and room together and stuff. I'll bet she's got Sky Satellite.
from strawberrri :
wooooooooow! you are like a triple A battery, only, you know, minus the battery bit. congrats and enjoy your holiday :)
from theswordsman :
Congrats on the grade grades, Claire. I'm never even a tad surprised when you get them. Have a great vacation.
from skinnylizzie :
*results...I even saw that mistake before I hit done and yet my idiotic brain pressed it anyway without my permission.
from skinnylizzie :
Congrats on the result, you big boff you :)
from stepfordtart :
Hoorah for you, you big ole smarty pants. Now you can Ibiza Without Guilt. aaaaaaaand relax! s x
from sunbeams100 :
Wow, excellent work darling! I've been wondering about your results you know! :) You are most impressive. :D I missed my GCSE results too, but I was in Spain so it made up for it. :)
from student-bum :
I know I told you on't day but congratulations again, clever-clogs! And gaah I'm so jealous of you going to Ibiza. Then again, I really shouldn't be as 5 days after you I'm going to Salou...
from stepfordtart :
Yay! or something.horribly drunk.sx
from student-bum :
You are incredibly sweet to say so, but you have not SEEN the Protruding Stomach of Doom which, despite all endevours, will not go. It's a family thing, alas - everyone in my family has one, bar my cousins, who are so naturally slim they look like they're starving. Bah. I might invest in a sarong. And I did mean to tell you, that black dress looked lovely on you :) I bet Rory liked it too ;)
from stepfordtart :
To my eternal shame, its Lidl or nothing for me! And nothing pre-made that could be home made (like cakes or ready meals or pasta sauce - stuff like that). I buy meat and vegetables and combine them in ever more inventive ways. I kind of miss the days when I was rich (my first marriage)when I didnt have to go to work and I bought meat from a proper butcher and had stuff delivered from gorgeous little delis. No fair. Now Im working full time AND making a couple of chicken breasts do curry for four AND Im grinding all my own bloody spices for the sauce. Ah well. At least I have a husband who loves me this time around! s x
from skinnylizzie :
THERE'S NO BERETS?! I haven't been to see it yet, I've been trying to decide whether I really do want to or not, mainly because I too long ago decided it couldn't possibly do my imagination any justice whatsoever. Although Robbie does look as drippy in the film as he does in my head, so at least that's a decent start I suppose. Oh, the new book, don't get me started...much as I love reading them, it's just getting silly now, the way she keeps drawing them out. Less and less happens in each one and it's driving me mad, waiting to find out the ending. Bah!
from stepfordtart :
Sorry. None of my fucking business. Your sisters beliefs are her own affair and you dont need to explain yourself to me. : ) Just kind of got reminded of the marriage preparation classes I went to before my first wedding (ahem!) when the vicar asked us all why we wanted to get married in church and one couple said, in all seriousness, "well, we looked at the registry office but it wasnt very big so this is more suitable". I felt like saying "Theres a mosque at the docks and its fucking HUGE, why not go down there?", but Im pretty sure they wouldnt have known what I was getting at. Soap box rant over now. s x
from portlypete :
Try as I might, I can't imagine the route that the Mum/Rory conversation could have taken to end up at Prince Alberts! I second the "nice legs" comment BTW.
from skinnylizzie :
Okay, I need your opinion on two extremely important matters that I actually meant to ask about six million years ago, but better late than never. Right, 1) what did you think of the new Georgia Nicolson? and 2) will you be going to see the film? I am still peeved that they changed the title, but whatever Trevor. By the way, the hair is tres funky!
from stepfordtart :
Lovely pic, dear - your hair looks splendid. Work IS crap, I am frankly surprised that a girlie as bright as you would have taken so long to work that out. Oh, and call me old-fashioned, but why did she go through the charade of a christening if she isnt religious? If it was to 'give the baby a name' then I think the Sikhs AND the Jews both have lovely naming ceremonies, AND you'd get to wear something sparkly and not feel out of place. Sorry. Just something Im a bit crabby about. I'll shut up now. s x PS Go to the girl bonding drink thing but be straight - say you're underage and if they're as nice as they seem, they'll probably make allowances. God,I AM a mum, arent I?
from theswordsman :
Nice legs.
from stepfordtart :
Ah! Another use for Advocaat - to wash down a hashcake! s x
from stepfordtart :
Mmmm, advocaaaaaaat! You can, if you are a bit gay, add some lemonade and a dash of lime and make a Snowball, but I prefer it in a smaller glass, with a shot of cherry brandy in the top as a Bleeding Heart. Or pour it on ice cream. That hasnt got a fancy name, its just Advocaat with Icecream, I think. s x
from stepfordtart :
What did they buy? If there was poptarts/pringles/a giant black forest gateau or a box of exotic fruit (like lychees or something) in there, then they were definitely stoned. s x
from portlypete :
Pea extraction I can understand. Sleeping while a fit young thing is lying awake next to you - that's hard to fathom!
from sunbeams100 :
Wait...you can order them without peas?! I always have to pick out each individual pea too! It's adorable that he did it for you though. :D
from stepfordtart :
*creeped out* I dont mean....ummm...'interfere', I just meant...ummm... Awww, you know what I meant! s x
from stepfordtart :
I reserve the right, as a mother, to interfere in my daughters sex lives for a couple more years yet. But then, they ARE 8 and 12. s x
from strawberrri :
wishing good health to stepdaddio. don't forget to take condoms to rory's :)
from student-bum :
Cancer? Owch. I hope it's not too serious :( But enjoy Rory's! ;)
from raven72d :
Maybe not Ibiza, but I hope you do get to go somewhere and be wild this summer.
from student-bum :
I won't listen to you complain about being skint - try having no money AND no holiday! At least you're going to Ibiza :P *resists urge to sing Vengaboys*
from stepfordtart :
Its all in the wrist. s x
from theswordsman :
It's fun how you managed to not tell us where you were instead of classes to maintain your mystique.
from stepfordtart :
Gasflash is a perfectly acceptable term. Boys who cringe at its mention are probablty a bit gay. Or public schoolboys (they prefer the terms Foofoo, frilly (opposite of willy, obviously!)or Auntie Mary). And they're probably the same ones who go all squirmy if a girl says 'cunt'. Tsk. What's the world coming to? If I say gashflash will I be cool again? I am wearing flipflops with giant wobbly plastic glitter flowers on them, so it may take more than a random icky swearword to restore my collitude, if Im honest. Sigh. s x
from theswordsman :
Wow, two entries in a row featuring scary "b" words - bob and boyfriend. Can't wait to see what's next. Have a brilliant weekend.
from randomrabbit :
I've absolutely no idea what a bob is/entails. That's possibly because I'm a bloke or possibly that I'm just a bit stupid. Who can tell? But it is rather fetching if I can say that without sounding too much like a lechy old perv.
from stepfordtart :
Actually, its rather lovely. And not a bob in the true sense of the word, cos you dont look like someone cut round a bucket on your head. Its a groovy bob. A bob for the 21st century. Hoorah! s x
from strawberrri :
and very lovely it is too!
from outer-jessie :
It's totally stylin', don't even sweat it. At least it's not a page boy, ewwww.
from student-bum :
But it's a GREAT bob - better than mine! At least you don't look like a boy. It looks lovely :)
from theswordsman :
Thanks, Claire. It was good to hear from you. Have a great weekend (if you want to - I don't want to be pushy about it).
from stepfordtart :
Just wear enormously tottery purple platform stilettos and tell everyone that the tar-and-feather combo is a Vivienne Westwood jumpsuit. Job done. s x
from punklola :
There is an R in grass, it's just invisible. Opposite, and yet strangely similar to the silent P on Pterodactyl.
from stepfordtart :
Perseverance and miniscule amounts of shame has always worked alright for me. Cant see the problem m'self. s x
from falabella :
I've always been a fan of natural beauty. But your hair always looks great, and it seems to be a part of your personality rather than trying to look like something you're not. And the roller coaster is about to start up again! Woohoo!
from raven72d :
"natural beauty" is no beauty at all. beauty needs craft, strategy, skill.
from punklola :
Pshoo, we certainly do not speak funny down south! It's the northerners that sound funny, and seem to put so much more effort into saying something than we do. (The West Country is not included in "south" and they do, in fact, speak very funny indeed and i take great joy in making any farmer people i come across feel horribly awkward by pointing out that they talk funny.)
from stepfordtart :
ONce Ibiza is over and done with, you'll practically be into 'Christmas Temps' territory so you might just be able to get something a bit more....ummm....cool to last you over the fetive festivities? s x
from punklola :
There are some sweet unis down south, but I suppose you could just have an aversion to anything south of Birmingham, just like I do to anything north of the Bedford. (Portsmouth and Brighton are looking pretty promising for 09 entry.)
from stepfordtart :
Think new eyeshadows might not actually 'go' with new bags. Think best not wear together. V clashing. s x
from raven72d :
write and be charming and flirty...
from portlypete :
Friday night and logging on to DL!!!!!? This has gone too far. (Yes, I know I just did the same).
from raven72d :
never give up debauchery...
from theswordsman :
I've always thought that you could write an entry about loo paper and make it interesting. Not that the boringest (from your point of view) day of your life isn't much more exciting than lp. Besides, a few of your readers have put up with my life for the past two years, so switching over to one of yours is like fireworks and bonfires with a bit of Lao Tsu tossed in for an oo er. Besides, we all kind of suspect that Ibiza is going to be Claire's Gone Wild, Part Deux. You should post more often. Take care.
from outer-jessie :
Nonsense! I find the Sixth-Form-and-working entries just as interesting as (and a little less vicariously nauseating than) the entries of drunken jaunts. And P.S. on the Sixth Form business: As an American, Sixth Form sounds to me like a place where the young and specially-gifted go to enhance their metamorphic powers, a la Transformers, Go Bots or Power Rangers.
from stepfordtart :
"Its the simple things for me from now on". And then you say you've given up boys. Make yer mind up, wumman! s x
from student-bum :
The one downside to Manc, apart from the fact you have to get AAB (btw they might lower the offer when you actually apply, it does happen), is you have to put up with cretins going "MAD-CHESTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR" in their worst Oasis impression at you. Even if you're only vaguely associated with it, like I am.
from theswordsman :
Hi Claire. I wasn't able to offer to adopt you, but I am on call 24/7 if you need someone to be encouraging or proud of you. And you totally deserve it for things like going to work and saving the money for a trip that means a lot to you. You're smart enough to get AAA's, and if it's Manchester you want, Manchester you shall have. And they'll be lucky to have you. Take care.
from smashthegas :
I've TOLD ya come to Liverpool, much more fun! manchester is full of... mancs.
from strawberrri :
thanks :D i'm excited to see where this goes...and if it doesn't work out at least i know i can go and grab another bull by its horns! or something like that :)
from theswordsman :
Hmmm. Sudden maturity, possibly as a result of having been awarded Teeth of Wisdom, or lull before the storm? I'm staying with the roller coaster theory until proved wrong. Take care.
from theswordsman :
Do you know the woman from Claire HQ who's on Big Brother?
from portlypete :
It's always satisfying to win a debate by the power of closely reasoned argument and razor-sharp wit.
from outer-jessie :
I could get away with "hot damn" a lot better if I had a thick twangy Texas accent, but as it is I must fake it. Hot damn, y'all! Hoo doggy! Et cetera.
from outer-jessie :
Aahhhh, refreshing. I have just finished reading up on all your old entries (<cough> at work </cough>) and I feel like I've just been reading a really good book. I know you're probably some sort of real person, but hot damn you make a good character! I am pleased. Carry on with the novel, if you would be so kind. I have many more hours at work and finding out where Ibiza is will only suck up about 0.001% of them. Cheers! OJ
from portlypete :
Many, many thanks for the birthday wishes. Have you considered a blue rinse. We'd make a great team: you, with your twinset and pearls; me, with my ear trumpet.
from strawberrri :
post a piccy of your hair. goooowaaawn :) also, never, never, never worry about uni debt. i am now the grand age of 24 and they seem to have forgotten about my loan, etc. get yerself a good education, which you're hugely capable of, being the clever bean that you are.
from strawberrri :
thanks! i certainly hope to have a lovely day :)
from theswordsman :
Well there was hardly any debauchery in that one:( Glad you're starting to feel better. Take care.
from leggierox :
Why thankyou! I love bandying about big superfluous words (see what I did there?) to make myself sound like a big boffin when in fact there's not much actually going on behind them =P How IS sixth form? what're you studying? I feel like an old aunty you haven't seen in ages, who assumes you're still in primary school =D x
from student-bum :
I actually had a shot of tea today, on the spur of the moment when I was having a cuppa in the kitchen and a shot glass was on our typically disgusting dining table. I can report that it was hot and slightly unpleasant, and tea is best enjoyed at a more leisurely pace. (I am not implying that you are hot and slightly unpleasant, although you are a fine looking girl and a lovely one to boot. And now I sound like some sort of lesbian perve so I'll go.)
from leggierox :
I wish I had consumption too. It'd be far more exciting than 'hayfever'. It's not even a real disease, more a half-arsed pathetic un-disease. It's not life-threatening, just irritating enough to put you in a foul mood. Humbug! x
from stepfordtart :
Aww. Anaethetise the toothy little fuckers with vodka. Thats some shit spelling I did in that last sentence but, hey, its ten to one in the morning and Im cooking snacks for stag night poker players, what do I care. s x
from raven72d :
How is life...? Remember: they do give you really great painkillers when they cut out wisdom teeth.
from student-bum :
My wisdom teeth still haven't come through and are showing no signs of doing so; I reckon I'll never get them and thus I can never be a true wise old woman. And I hear you about the sleep, I have the worst sleep patterns possible. Last night though was hideous, as neds were letting off fireworks, someone was being VERY noisy in the flat above, and I can't even nap now as KJ is playing her music really loudly YET AGAIN and I can't tell her to shut up again. Ugh. (And I'm expected to go to a 10-hour rave tonight.) Have you taken any ibuprofen? That may help with the swelling. xxx
from theswordsman :
Your "wisdom" teeth showed up just in time for your exams - further proof that you live a charmed life. Hope you feel better soon. Have a great weekend.
from smashthegas :
Believe it or not, even at my old (heh) age, my wisdom tooth on the lower right side is trying to come through, too and causing discomfort among the teeth there. So much so that when I was eating a bag of crisps last week, one of them broke clean in half cos of the cracks in it caused by the wisdom tooth. The only consolation was it didn't really hurt cos the tooth had had a root canal done on it already. May you feel better soon, dear! Smashxxx
from student-bum :
I turned up for my General Studies Maths without a calculator. It's funny when it happens...
from portlypete :
Never confuse intelligence with common sense. I know a professor who is a top notch expert in all sorts of clever nuclear physicy stuff, but has trouble remembering to zip his fly. I confidently predict an exam grade of at least an A followed by several stars for you. Don't disappoint. I think I had analepsis once - you can get a cream from the chemist that clears it up in no time.
from leggierox :
why greetings! I suspected you had moved to fresh pastures and not disappearted entirely ;) user: trick, pw: treat. Not particularly inventive, but derren brown inspiration is all I have at the mo =P Hows things with you? I'll go back and read some of your entries to answer that question meself at some point, but until then?... x
from strawberrri :
oh my god, thank heavens you went with no kiss!! good luck for the rest of ye exams :)
from stepfordtart :
You twerp. Fingers crossed for country-wide retardation to keep you in the top marks bracket. Your mention of magdalene the pre-approved ho, reminded me of beiong at MY Catholic school back when videos were in their infancy (yes. really). Sister Thomas started a video club where for 50p , 30 girls could sit in the library after school and watch the latest releases on a VCR the size of a small block of flats, attached to a TV the size of a half pound box of Dairy Milk. Sister Thomas didnt know much about films and was reliant on the man in the video shop for inspiration. You can only imagine our glee to find that one time when "this weeks super comedy (for upper school only as its a AA (15) certificate)" was Life of Brian. We got to the bit where Brian tells the crowd to fuck off, then she switched it off and sent us home. *sigh* happy days. s x
from student-bum :
Well, number one, you're far better than someone's bit on the side and if that's what they're using you for they're arseholes. Number two, I think you should keep trying with Rory. (I am the expert on this - remember, I was the founder of Team Fittie for Zoe, and look what's happening there... mwahahaha.) Go Team Rory! And number three, he will come round. I bet you a the last Kinder Egg that's in my food locker that if you just be his mate for a while, good things will happen. God, your diary is like a novel at the moment, it's brilliant :D Oh and number four, someone did what Mitch did to you to me a couple of years ago and I know how sucky it feels.
from smashthegas :
Oh just stop fucking about. Call Rory and tell him you want him. Nothing will go wrong. I've seen the scripts for next weeks episodes. Smashxxx
from theswordsman :
More debauchery, please.
from stepfordtart :
Peter Andre and Shot of Tea...separated at birth! Heeheehee - that made me laugh loads and loads. Thanks for that. s x
from randomrabbit :
The reason your legs remain so white might be that you're... a pasty chuff! Available skin colours: bright red and white or combinations of the 2. Chin up!
from theswordsman :
When I was little, I had a cat that used to travel the block to the nearest corn field and bring back something tasty for tea. I never knew what I'd find when I opened the garage door. I'm pretty sure that none of those victims were prostitutes either, because the animals in the neighborhood were kind of easy. I read once that for people that don't naturally have a lot of pigment, it takes three days of controlled sun exposure before the pigment can be recruited and a bit of tanning can start. The trick is not getting too much the first few days and burning. Keep up the good work with the studying.
from random-ditto :
Manchesterrrr. Its simple really. I have to go away for a year in a few months as part of my course & it breaks my heart to be leaving! xXx
from smashthegas :
You should def come to Liverpool cos it's where I live and you can say you met psycho Smashy and he tried to kill you with various implements. Of course, stepfordtart met me in Liverpool and I didn't do that to her so she will tell you I'm not a psycho at all and just get drunk and laugh a lot. But that ain't good for my hardman rocker image, hehe. Smashxxx PS Please don't go to Manchester.
from student-bum :
I'll adopt you! Except, erm, I may be a bit drunk at the mo. But yeah, stick to your guns, Manchester is WAY better than Liverpool in every sense. And don't apply to Manchester Met either, you're most definitely good enough for Manchester proper like :D And ooh I'll be near you! When I'm home anyway. That'd be cool.
from vintagejunk :
Yeah, and I feel so much better now for not having to hide it. RELIEVED, actually. Lying's awful.
from portlypete :
I thought of adopting you for maybe a millisecond before commonsense prevailed. I couldn't afford the drinks bill. When I went to Liverpool Uni on a visit, I thought the place had a tremendous vitality. On the downside, we did come across a pile of floral tributes to a student who'd been stabbed .
from stepfordtart :
Thought of you yesterday when some zit faced burgundy polo shirted goon was making a dogs arse out of handling my paltry purchases in Sainsburys. You couldnt come and work in our one instead could you? At least you sound competent! s x
from portlypete :
Buckle down gal, or you may get first hand experience of the 'physiological response to stress' as you stare at that exam paper. :-) Sorry to hear you're down though.
from smashthegas :
*growlz* Okay, I'll let ya get away with calling me Grandad this once, hehe. Sorry to hear you're a bit fed up though. Bank holidays can be like that sometimes, especially when you have to work them, but fook, at least it's closer to the weekend now. Have a good one *hugz* Smashxxx
from portlypete :
Q: "Getting kicked out of the club for being too drunk (how did they measure this?)" A: Huge alcohol overlimit forbids me from remembering who said this: "I don't consider myself drunk until I can't lie on the floor without holding on".
from skinnylizzie :
Oh boo, is it not that good? I quite fancied seeing it too, even if the thought of Russell Brand even semi-naked makes me feel violently ill.
from smashthegas :
How about I be your gigolo? Okay I may be a longhair skanky rocker and a bit plumptious, but at 6'7" I can intimidate many MATES by dint of sheer stature alone. I can also drink beer till it's replaced blood in my veins and steal their cars and drive them withr eckless abandon. Good for pissing off your mum, if you like that kind of thing. Heh. And I do great hugz. Ask Stepfie, she has hugged me more than once. *hugz* Smashxxx
from stepfordtart :
Dont grow your armpit hair, just move on. Take five minutes (ok, three) to say "That was kind of fun, then it was a bit crap, now Im done with it" and then just yell "NEXXXXXXXXT!". Oh, and have a ((hug)), cos Im a mum and its my job to do that. s x
from student-bum :
Haha, ughughugh looks like hughughugh! Which looks like ughughugh. Which looks like... oh, I have a headache.
from student-bum :
Mitch is a tosser. I shall get the Team Fittie cheerleaders (see Zoe's notes page if you're confused) to do a MITCH IS A TOSSER routine, possibly to that hideous song by Natasha Bedingfield ("Singlllllllllllle..." ughughugh, but appropriate). Thanks for your note by the way. And it would be incredibly groovy to meet you one day! Fancy a trip to Glasvegas? :P
from stepfordtart :
Acrylic nails on her toes?!!!! Eeeuw! Now I have a pic in my mind of someone with ginormous nail-art'ed talons on their feet, walking around baerfoot and going clickety with their toenails on the floor like a dog. *shudder* doesnt bear thinking about. s x PS Mitch is a twat.
from smashthegas :
It does indeed suck when you'r ein one of those relationships where you know in your heart it's a failure but blind faith (or crass stupidity, in my case) makes you just keep on trying. As much as I hate to say it, the only thing is to cut it off completely. So there you go. Official permission from Smash to ignore his advice totally and entertain him with more entries of amusing "What a bastard he is" stories. And as for the Cunty McBollocks or whatever it was Stepfie mentioned in her entry, I find "Cunty McNippletwanger" is also a good insult. Hope this week is better for you, dear. Smashxxx
from student-bum :
If you have ANY questions about the evil that is UCAS then please ask. I know the pain you are going/going to go through all too well... I can see if I can dig out my own personal statement as a template for you if you so wish. But yeah. Uni is not scary - well, it is for the first twelve hours. But after that it's just bloody fun. I wish I could do Freshers' Week all over again...
from the-moo :
When that happened to G's Ipod recently he bought a new battery from Ebay (I think or it might have been ebuyer I don't listen much haha) and it was like £4 and came the next day took no time to put in and TADA... fully working Pyod again!! xxx
from skinnylizzie :
Shush woman, I need no encouragement!
from stepfordtart :
Cunty McBollocks is totally the best insult name ever. Trouble is, everytime I go to say it out loud (for practising purposes, I havent actually worked out who Im going to CALL it yet), I start laughing. Thats not goot. I need to have a few more tries. Possibly in front of the mirror, whilst wearing a very cross expression. s x
from student-bum :
Oh lordy, I remember the days of AS stress (in more ways than one). That was the exam I froze over and wrote 1 sentence for an 18 mark essay, due to stress funnily enough. Tip: don't do that, it's bad. I found it funny when Dr Hippie was explaining about fight or flight and all of that - I just wanted to say "yeah, mate, I'm doing a degree in Psychology, I kind of know already..." but then again I couldn't really. His beard was distracting more than anything else. And thanks about the grades :)
from strawberrri :
god, the barrister's defendant was one that went down for murder and he was still pestering me to go for a drink afterwards...mental! it is a bit of a crazy atmosphere - i always thought it would be the gory and gruesome stuff that would get to me, not the emotional stuff. it's not uncommon for court staff to end up in tears. ah, justice.
from the-moo :
I think we should move to a nice sensible country with nice sensible weather.. we could go to tibet and remove china?? xxx
from skinnylizzie :
You and Annie are BONKERS, my friend. As I just mentioned on her notes page, Fittie is a totally horny womaniser who is madly in lust with Pickle (more or less a direct quote there). Fit he may be, but good romantic material he ain't! Deary deary me, what an appalling thought...
from portlypete :
Ah, if you were Captain Hastings to my Poirot, you would have detected the clues in earlier entries and would have a good idea where I live. But now I remember that Hastings was a clueless buffoon (unlike your good A* self). I too like foxes in the right setting, which is not frolicing in my dustbin. Have a great term.
from sunbeams100 :
Claire, I have finally caught up on your diary, therefore I can leave notes again, huzzah! Agh too many commas...anyway. Good choice of books, is my first geekish comment. I haven't read The Virgin Suicides (is it any good?) but Girl Interrupted is brilliant, makes you think a lot but not enough for you to resent the book. :D Secondly - I think I missed a huge chunk of your diary a few months ago, as I don't remember reading about your sister's miscarriage. :( My belated condolences, that's awful. As was the piggy situation, which I had to have explain to me by Sarah when I visited, read a page of your diary and had no idea who he was. :) It's quite big and brave of you to want to be friends with him I think, I dunno if I'd be able to do that. ...And that is all. *Cuddles of I-am-up-to-date-yay!*
from the-moo :
OH BOOOO HISSSS I totally can't remember what I was going to say but it was REALLY good I promise.. just pretend that I said whatever would have been the BEST thing I could say here? :oP I've missed you xxx
from smashthegas :
In addition to the My Little Pony dressing gown I also have a full Jem and the Holograms outfit as well. And Stepfie smells. But anyway. Punctuation is useful isn't it? Without it, you would have been waking at ten and thinking 'fuck the carpet' which would have had all your readers choking on their Evian.
from stepfordtart :
Bouncers are all knob-heads. With teeny tiny winkies. Thats why they do bouncing, cos it makes them feel big. Which they're not. Well, not their teeny weeny peenies, anyway. s x PS Smash is a git. But I love him. He has a My Little Pony dressing gown.
from smashthegas :
Stepfie's note below is how it REALLY is in her house. I know, I've been twice. And I can feel no remorse for throwing caution to the wind and telling you in a public forum that *whispers* she only vacuums ROUND the rugs, and not under them! Honestly, I ran my finger along one of the windowledges and there was enough dust to turn event eh healthiest person into an asthmatic. Anyways fuck that, I came to say skinheads are NEVER cool, okay? To a longhair like me that is just WRONG, ya know? Hehe. I shall shush now. Enjoy your easter egg and vegging on the sofa! Smashx
from theswordsman :
You have a most excellent face. Have a great weekend.
from stepfordtart :
I dont look like The Hef in a dressing gown. I look like the subject of one of those Channel 4 documentaries that has a voiceover which starts "Stepfie is a crackwhore. Her 8 children have been taken away and she spends her days in this filthy hovel, turning tricks to feed her habit" and then I shuffle on, dough-faced, bleached hair managing to look both greasy AND dry at the same time, coughing like a consumptive victorian child and looking hollow-eyed and totally wankered. My ex-husband used to look like Uncle Fester in his dressing gown. BF doesnt have a dressing gown. He prefers to wrap a towel around his waist, put his hands on his hips and say "I. Am. Skeletor" which is a bit sad in a 45 year old. s x
from student-bum :
Yeah I'm not exactly long-legged (30"... so depressing) so it should be about knee-length on me, har har. I shall have a look when I get back to Glasvegas. Lancaster isn't fortunate enough to have an H&M. It does have a New Look though, and Mum's asked me to take back a top of hers that was £14 and spend the money on me. Hmm...
from student-bum :
Ah portlypete, I have known this girl since she was a wee lass of 13, she knows I'm only joking! Oh god, I feel old now. To Claire, I really like your skirt. Where did you get it? I've been looking for a short black skirt for myself for ages and I can't find one I like. Glad you had a good night. Strongbow is your (somewhat unladylike but ultimately cheap and delicious) friend.
from portlypete :
student-bum, how could you ask such a question!? I didn't have it it mind to wonder at all. Honest! But a woman who can cook has to rate a premium.
from student-bum :
And how much did you reply for your body? Hehehehe.
from theswordsman :
Hi Claire, I think the woman wins, hands down:) But if you ever start quoting a price for the other thing, please post it as it might inspire some of us to start piling up the cash. Congrats on being self-sufficient in the jacketed potato department (we rarely dress ours over here). Enjoy your time off, and have a Happy Easter.
from smashthegas :
Everyone was in a mass? A mass what? Murder? Suicide pact? Chocolate Pop Tart eating competition?
from portlypete :
I can't commend your choice of tipple, but I'd still stand you a WKD if I could, or should it be a Black V today? Sláinte.
from skinnylizzie :
Ta very much! I quite like the Cindy Beale-esque idea, although he did send me a pretty decent text yesterday which makes me think that perhaps I should just give him a severe duffing up instead and leave it be...
from smashthegas :
I don't see why they are so bothered about kids binge drinking lately. I mean fook, I can remember when I was 12 - and event hen I was so big and hairy that it was always me sent to the offy to get the drinks - getting shift faced and puking everywhere every single weekend. I'm convinced if they banned Ant and Dec, Big Brother, I'm a celebrity, Pop idol and all the other shit reality TV shows, the world wouldn't be in the state it's in today. Hmph.
from buffylass :
Ha, I feel you deserve some amazing gift for that lovely note. I'm back... it was inevitable really. I love talking about myself too much.
from smashthegas :
Are you sure he wasn't just singing along to Madonna's 1984 classic hit at an unfortunately VERY inappropriate time?
from theswordsman :
Oh crap - daily pointless entries are a sign of madness???:(((
from annanotbob :
Gross - dirty old git. I'd ask for another driver if I were Katie. I have to say I LOVE your writing, you know. You have such a brilliant turn of phrase. Now fuck off and do some course work ;)
from portlypete :
Glad you're not in bits. Please bombard away. I collect pointless things - jobs, lives etc
from student-bum :
Well, at least it was found...! Seriously, though, why WOULD they bomb where you live?! Madness. It's hardly a hotbed of political activity, is it? (My brother was born there though. Erm, huzzah.)
from smashthegas :
You get in a huff when the GREAT POPULAR KING OF DIARYLAND SMASH has taken the trouble to leave you a note? I'll tell both my readers about this. My mother and father will be disappointed. BITTERLY disappointed.
from smashthegas :
Paul Danan in a road safety video. Sad how quickly a career can end. Even sadder when Stepfie gives you advice as detailed in her note below of exactly how she used to try to come across as cool and mysterious circa 1988. (She'll kill me if she sees this note, ROFL) Smashxxx
from stepfordtart :
I know! Dont tell your friends that you have to work. On the way to the pub after work, rip a hole in your tights, smear your lipstick a bit and stagger into the pub looking wankered and ABSOLUTELY refusing to say where you've been. Act like a total tool and they will all think you are drunk and that you have had a prior (and fantastically fantastic it was TOO) engagement. You can sip one diet coke for the rest of the evening (thus saving £££s)and say "*hic* No ta, I shthink I vad enough". Every 10 minutes of so, start giggling and when questioned say "Oh! Its nothing. Just remembering something that happened earlier." You will retain an air of utmost mystery and coolitude whilst all the while being a secretsobersainsburyshiftworker. Yay! s x
from student-bum :
Trust me, shopping is fun the first time. The second time it's alright. Third time, bearable. Fourth time you want to order a takeaway because you cannot be arsed. Oh yeah, and come and celebrate St Paddy's Day with me - I'll have a proper Oirishman with me! Mwahahaha. And I'll be surrounded by Oirish on Friday at Paddy Pop. Again, mwahahahahaaa... Join me! You know you want to, if only for the accents.
from stepfordtart :
Oi fackin ATE poikeys. Sorry, I had to say that. Its the law. I love that film. s x
from student-bum :
Nice one on the AS grades! You're doing better than I was at that stage...
from theswordsman :
Congrats on the great grades, and on surviving being a member of the work force. Maybe you should raise your sights above being a proper person and perhaps become Empress of something or other?
from skinnylizzie :
Well done on the groovy gravy results!
from stepfordtart :
Haha! Im so trying that chair thing on Slaveboy tomorrow. He sits next to me and we do spasms of intense work, interspersed with chatting. Wonder how long it will take him to notice. Thanks for that. s x
from smashthegas :
Wait until you've been held at gunpoint for your first time. Thass always a bit more exciting. I remember when I first held up the local co-op, the girl there said it was the most exciting shift she'd ever had. Smashxxx
from newmillenia :
Hey! Found your diary while moseying around and I liked it so much, I simply HAD to add you. =)
from stepfordtart :
"I guess!" What kind of answer is THAT?! He's not worthy, dear, of your attention. Or any of your other bits. Dont shag musicians tho. The are sponging bastards and you will end up living in a big house and having to work awfully hard at a job you hate in order to finance their beer habit. Oh, no. Hang on. That was me. Sorry. As you were. s x
from stepfordtart :
I think I see the difference between our homw-hairdo experiences. You are going for a posh 'ready-mix' colour, whereas I am using the bog standard 40vol peroxide and powder bleach and then just putting a platinum rinse on it to lessen the Barbiesque qualities. You clearly have more money than I....even if I dont look like a Teatime Selection! You're dead posh, you! s x
from stepfordtart :
I think I see the difference between our homw-hairdo experiences. You are going for a posh 'ready-mix' colour, whereas I am using the bog standard 40vol peroxide and powder bleach and then just putting a platinum rinse on it lo lessen the Barbiesque qualities. You clearly have more money than I....even if I dont look like a Teatime Selection! You're dead posh, you! s x
from smashthegas :
With all those biscuit analogies I feel like picking you up, tipping you upside down and dunking you in my tea. And it wasn't an earthquake. It was one of my post-Stella farts. heh.
from stepfordtart :
You can do your roots yourself (with maybe a bit of help at the back!). Its easily peasily. I do my own and always look fabulous and hardly ever like I have got a slice of cheese on toast on my head. (Or as BF likes to say "your hair is like a field of corn....thats been sown on tarmac"). Seriously tho, find a friend with a Sally's card and get some cut price product on that barnet. s x
from skinnylizzie :
Hmm, I always thought I was much keener on the Geordie in the beginning than he was on me, and then we ended up having a massive row that started because he insisted he had to do all of the texting, ringing and forcing me out of the house (well, I didn't want to appear TOO desperate...). Men are such strange creatures. You also have my sympathy vis-a-vis the working thing, it is bloody tough. Just be thankful you're not at Morrisons wearing a bow tie is my sage advice tonight.
from smashthegas :
That Stepfie is so un-pc. I know, I've met her. But then I'm not PC either. I do it with style, though. heh. Smashxxx
from stepfordtart :
Haven't you got another friend who could take that last place? Maybe someone who is desperate to be 'in' with your gang but is actually a bit of a spaz. Or a gay man? Gay men are FUN to take on holiday...and they will generally keep the villa nice and tidy, too. s x
from sunbeams100 :
I don't think you're a loser, your first job is always exciting! Not only are you making money for the first time but you get all that lovely independance. Erm, depending where you work, I'm sure Sainsburys is nice! Hope today is going well and that you don't get arsey customers! <3
from strawberrri :
working is great. i made tons of friends at argos when i worked there, plus got sent down the conveyor belt occasionally and even had a customer scream at me how she would never shop there again. fun times! you're young enough to pull off coming home circa 5 am of a saturday night, sleeping for three hours then getting up for a whole sunday shift at saino's. i perfected that artform amazingly back int' day. glad it went well for you :)
from stepfordtart :
I think you may be confusing "looking forward to going to work" with "looking forward to getting paid". Still, if your co-workers turn out to be anything like the amoeba-brained hedgehog eaters we have working in OUR local Sainsburys, they will at least provide you with hours of diary-fodder - along the lines of "what my fucking stupid co-workers said today". I cant wait. s x
from smashthegas :
I do love all you can eat chinese buffets. In our local one in central, the head waiter groans when he sees me coming and yells to the kitchen, in Chinese "That fat long-haired fucker is in AGAIN! Pop another 4 crispy ducks on, will you?"
from strawberrri :
thanks! it is indeed a great place to work. i even got papped by the press today as i happened to be going in at the same time as the murdered model's family. crab claws are fucking lovely...but my friend had one explode on her once so she doesn't trust them anymore! i always take the risk :)
from raven72d :
Looking like a walrus is always fun.
from raven72d :
Chopsticks make such great photo props...
from smashthegas :
Funny, I came here upon recommendation of another English (like me) diarylander, and got to your extras page, saw your pic, and thought "Aww, she had a zit near her gob when that pic was taken." Then I realised it was a bogey on my screen from when I sneezed earlier this afternoon, and I thought "Smash, you stupid cunt."
from student-bum :
Adopt the same policy me and my mates do at our Chinese buffet*: all you can eat is a challenge, not an offer. (*not bugger as I just typed.)
from stepfordtart :
"we’re only friends now because we don’t know how to be anything else to each other" - Oooch. Ive got a 'friend' just like that. It sucks. Much yayness on the lie in, I heartily approve. I had one today for the first time in about six months. Id like to say it was a similarly decadent TV and fruit-flavoured confectionery fuelled episode but I was, actually, asleep. Til 11.45. Now I feel slightly guilty that I have wasted a big chunk of the day. Meh. Mum Guilt. s x
from buffylass :
Yay for you and the job!
from skinnylizzie :
Hurrah, congrats on the (almost but practically) employed situation! Sainsbury's is much better than Tesco, and don't even get me started on Asda. And at Morrisons they have to wear stupid bow ties. You chose well.
from stepfordtart :
Any danger of a slightly more comprehensive review on the old Sweeney Tod thingy? My daughter's sooooo desperate to see it and you're a fuck sight closer her age than I am. Is it too gory for a 12 year old super-mature babygoth who's already seen Van Helsing and a whole shed load of similarly unsuitable films? I await your verdict....s x
from student-bum :
"As he kissed the top of my head and my stomach did this funny little flip I’ve never had before..." Aaah I love that. When you really like someone it happens practically every time they do it (except when you're ill and feel like you're dying). Congrats on the job! 16.5 hours a week is a lot though. I'm sure you can handle it ;)
from theswordsman :
Hey Claire. Congrats on the almost job, and the remarkable progress towards being a proper person. At this pace you'll probably be elected to public office before you're eighteen, but then you wouldn't be a proper person any more and would have to start over. Hmmm. You're right - you do have a complicated life. It's always fun to read about, though. Take care.
from strawberrri :
when i had my interview at argos when i was 16 i only got asked two questions. one of them was 'what are your hobbies?' and i don't remember the other one. just have a 'the customer comes first' attitude and you'll be fine :) except i've just looked and you wrote your entry 23 hours ago so this is conpletely pointless, unless a travelling backwards in time claire should ever find this! hope it went gooood and you are employed and stuff.
from raven72d :
Please do come by and read. And, yes: I enjoy your entries as well.
from sunbeams100 :
What did you think of the Robots? I'm seeing them (for the 3rd time, erk) next week, HUZZAH!
from skinnylizzie :
This quick reply is going to make me look like a right saddo (now there's a 90s word that should be used more often), but I happened to be all logged in when I got your notes so I am replying like the keen little badger that I am (no...I don't know either. You'd think I'd been drinking). I'm only locked temporarily seeing as people I work with (some of them of the hot and male variety, mentioning no nicknames) have found my myspace where I stupidly have the same URL as my username here. Therefore I am lockamajigged up until I have eradicated all traces of work-related talk from my diary (which is why I am logged in and beavering away now), and then the stupid password is off again. Alright, longest note ever, I need to leave. New Lost last night as well, hurrah!
from skinnylizzie :
Ooh, good luck for tomorrow! Don't ever start a sentence with 'I know I haven't had much experience but...' and tell them lovely things like you're a quick learner, flexible with working hours and very trustworthy. Without sounding like a total suck-up, obviously. I never believed my dad when he said interviewers are often just as nervous, but when I went for the interview at my job the woman started it by saying 'good GOD, I'm nervous, I never do these things'. I'm blithering. Hope it goes well!
from raven72d :
Clever witty entries, girl--- vur' fun!
from stepfordtart :
AaaH! I was SO hoping that was going to be the tune! I was already singing it in readiness (and making up my own words....which were uncannily similar to your own!). I heartily applaud the use of the word Cunt. If you say it to a boy, does his eyes go all round and saucer-y, like if you'd said your mum is a prozzie? If I say it in front of men they always look a bit shocked. And sometimes they gasp. But then, the men I know are either old or arent used to hearing someone who could be their mum using such language. I work on the assumption that, as I have one, I can say it as much as I like. s x
from stepfordtart :
I love reading your diary. It reminds me very much of being 17 myself and having waaaaay too many Rizzo moments. These days they're more Blanche moments, unfortunately but, hey, y'win some, y'lose some. Im singing "there are worse things" now, in yuor honour. s x
from stepfordtart :
I phoned my mother on the morning Pricess Diana died and said "Ohmygosh mummie, Princess Di's dead!" and she said ".......yeh?.....go on, then.......?" She thought it was the beginning of a joke and was waiting for the rest of it. My mother is a twisted individual. s x
from ivyparker :
so indulging, your writing. did i spell that right? probably not. all the best.
from strawberrri :
i lost weight on the pill. and got bigger boobs.
from student-bum :
Ooh lucky you with your holiday! I am holiday-less. Boo. And hurrah for the Pill. Ok, this is making NO SENSE AT ALL...
from stepfordtart :
Make sure your cardigan has sequins on it. That way you'll never be properly grown up. Oh and if an estate agent was asking you impertinent questions about how to get your mangled corpse home in the event of a JD fuelled mishap involving a balcony, you are quite within your rights to tell her to fuck off. Only TRAVEL agents have the right to ask that kind of stuff. *snigger* s x
from randomrabbit :
Hope your mum didn't do anything too unpleasant for not walking the dog. My mum threatens that she'll let the hair grow on her chin and start going out in her slippers if I don't phone her more often.
from student-bum :
An AAB will get you into any uni you want to, so good on you for wanting that :) May I impart some words of wisdom though... in the summer, revise like hell, even if you don't think you need to (though the January exams aren't AS important). Seriously, I didn't do as well as I could have in my AS levels and ended up not being able to get an A in Psychology which might have got me a place at Edinburgh. But I'm sure you'll do fine, you're certainly clever enough. Any thoughts about where you want to go yet? Oh jeebus, I sound horribly old. I'm going to go and rave for a bit.
from stepfordtart :
I could come with you as your "looker-afterer"! Your dad would be BOUND to say yes then, seeing as I am a respectable pillar of the community and a mummie with a career! Psst. Dont tell him about the whisky binges and the porn library and the questionable parenting skills and the pretending to work whilst surfing Wiki to find out if Polfeirio Rubirosa really did have a 12" penis. It'll be fine. s x
from stepfordtart :
Shitty social clubs = Goooood! Mostly because shitty social clubs = cheap booze. My local one does a double scotch for £1.55. Joy! The trick to the midweek hangover, now that I am old, is to be sufficiently high up the corporate ladder to be an absolute foul-tempered bitch to everyone til the hangover wears off. Im THAT important at work that people just assume Im being a 'forceful, career minded, go-getter who takes no prisoners' rather than the truth which is that I am a 'demented, hungover waste of a suit who is only frowning and speaking in monosyllables cos of the effort of not puking into her laptop case.' Study hard, little student and grow up just like me! Not. s x
from strawberrri :
how did you bruise your finger?
from skinnylizzie :
My hangovers since I hit my twenties have been ungodly; I miss being a teenager and being able to drink like a fish. Anyway, good luck for tomorrow! Revision is so overrated.
from stepfordtart :
Splendid new layout - very stylish! What does Mitch do for a living? Watch out if he's a magician, whilst you're out on that drive he might suddenly turn into a lay-by. Somehow that jole sounded much better in my head than it did when I typed it out. Meh. Have a good one. s x
from skinnylizzie :
Ha, NICE new comments on your profile! Mince Pie Girl will do me just fine. And also, I shall remain eternally jealous of your Spice Girls experience. I too wish I could SPICE UP MY LIFE.
from skinnylizzie :
Oh, I love that lyric. It was a toss-up between that or the other one in my stupid end-of-year quiz, and I figured that it was probably a little greedy to use both. What is Mitch short for?! I can't quite get my head around it actually being his real name, it pleases me greatly to know that there are people in the world with such an excellent name. Crap, I'm blithering again.
from stepfordtart :
Thanks very much. That you didnt say "Oh My Fucking GOD, you get to see his knob and its HUGE!!!" is enough for me to be able to wait for it to come out on DVD. Enjoy your choc - I got BF one of those for Christmas. M'self, I prefer the minty choc to the orangey choc. s x
from stepfordtart :
I want to see that film but Im a bit concerned about my motives. Do I think it might be a bit of escapist amusement in a non-intellectual way, or do I just want to see Will Smith taking at least SOME of his clothes off? If its the former, then I may go, and take BF, and eat popcorn and occasionally guffaw at the more improbable bits of plot. If its the latter, I fear I may have to just sneak in at the back, by myself. Possibly wearing a raincoat. Can you advise the level of buffitudiness achieved by Mr Smith during the film for me please. Thank you. s x
from skinnylizzie :
Glad the date went well, although I do have a question - is Mitch his REAL name?!
from stepfordtart :
Ive slurped whisky out of a guitarists belly button. Do I win a prize? s x
from onlyemma :
Good luck for your date! xxx
from random-ditto :
I second that, how cuuuuuute! You must be a very proud auntie. Glad you survived xmas with festive spirit intact & all... am kinda jealous about your skinny jeans because I will never be able to pull something like that off & look cool. So well done you! xXx
from student-bum :
Aaw, baby Olivia looks so cute! I'm glad you had a good Christmas. And I'm glad it was better than mine. I could probably draw those bathroom towels from memory :( My Christmas dinner consisted of 1 slice of carrot, 2 mushrooms, 5 very small roasties and a teeny slice of chicken, as that was all I could manage and even then I felt sick. And THEN I missed a phone call from the boy before he went to the Rep. of Ireland because I left my phone upstairs. Today the relatives are round and alas, there is no escape for me. Hope Gypsy is better soon, I know how crap it is having ill pets (having had many of them, ill and otherwise) xxx
from strawberrri :
sorry to hear about gypsy! hope she's alright, the poor wee hound.
from random-ditto :
That's quite alright... sorry I didn't mean to scare you by appearing like that. I just stopped writing for a little while over the summer when I had no proper internet access etc etc. Back now though! Not that I'm writing anything decent really, but hey ho. I hope you have a good xmas xXx
from stepfordtart :
Hippy Humper! Heeeeeeee! (sorry. Im surely MUCH too old to find that funny.....*snort* Oops, couldnt stop myself!). I, too, am being craptacular at being Christmassy. Tell you what, dont get me anything and I wont get you anything. There! We've saved ourselves half an hour that can now be better spent on looking at shoes and wondering how much they might be reduced by in the sales. s x
from student-bum :
Oh yes, and I will add that true friends do not stand up and say in such a fashion as the notes below by a certain person that you're making mistakes and pre-judging your life. Proper friends watch from the sidelines and are there to look after you IF/WHEN it goes wrong, not lecturing you before anything's even happened. I hope that makes sense. Do what makes you happy, you deserve to be happy.
from student-bum :
Ah Claire. That entries just sums up what I love about you. x
from stepfordtart :
If I had a pound for every girl I know who'd lost her virginity to an undeserving tit-face....well I'd have two quid (from me and you!) for a start - Maybe we should start a club! At 41, I do really feel I should give you a bit of a "Im so disappointed" type telling off but, hey, its your minge, and what you do with it is entirely your own affair. I kind of hope the whole thing was just a little bit crap, cos that way it can only get better - just imagine if your first time was your best time ever! How shit would THAT be! ((hug)) s x
from meanpony :
I still think you're pretty cool. Of course, I think loads of people are cool, since my idea of fun times is sitting around my parent's house drinking alcohol and watching dvd's. I maybe wouldn't listen to me about serious things. But I could also tell you stories about roommates of mine who did tons more crazy stuff than I did and they were honors students who are graduating from college on time. I won't, though, because I suck at telling stories.
from random-ditto :
I do read your diary & have done for a while... & I'm very glad you posted the entry you did today, I think you definitely had the right to respond & was hoping you would. As someone said - you're definitely not the first to have found yourself in this situation... Not that I'm an old or wise one myself but I could ramble on for ages but good point well made, basically. xXx
from strawberrri :
i and many people i'm sure are massively fond of you and, it's stating the bleeding obvious, but of course you're not going to be the same person you were when you were 13. NOR will you be the same person in 3 years time and 3 years after that. you're having new experiences, becoming an adult and yadda yadda. still having your virginity at 17 is quite a rarity these days - i have friends who lost theirs at 13 and 14 and were rebellious and wayward but still turned out fine, going to uni and having a career. you've got fantastic gcses, are doing a levels and *gasp* also enjoying your life. as for not revealing certain scandalous going ons - completely natural. these diaries are PUBLIC! :) i've done stuff i wouldn't in a million years write about in here because 1) we are entitled to privacy, believe it or not and 2) yeah i don't want to be judged for everything i have ever done, be it good or bad. going out at drinking isn't of massive concern either - most students do this several nights a week and it's such a detriment to them that the end of uni they are even awarded degrees and get jobs. ignore any sanctimonious criticism. apologies for the essay!
from duchessmoon :
One last thing before I leave....in this life you will find that there will be lots of people that will be there to tickle your ears with flattering words when you've messed up. But a true friend will have the guts to stand up and tell you when they think you are about to mess up to try to protect you.
from duchessmoon :
You are amazing. So open and mature and I can see what you are saying, but let me tell you something I have learned, and I know you are fair enough and honest enough to consider it. If you are hiding something then you have something to hide. If you REALLY feel you haven't changed then you wouldn't be feeling so afraid to let others see what you are really doing. If you REALLY weren't ashamed by some of your actions you wouldn't be hiding them. When you admit to fearing what others will think of you then you are admitting that you are doing something that you have not done before. That's change. You are changing. The more you binge the more you will want to binge and before long you will need to binge and won't be able to hide it. Bad decisions will be made and outcomes will not be able to be changed. I didn't imply that this was the final nail in your coffin. Far from it. I was just trying to say be careful from here on out. Something happened to you that will never be changed. It didn't go well, you were hurt. It could have been different for you. If only you had placed yourself in a different situation. See? Now you can take what I say and make me out to be mean or not understand or make excuses or you can be the amazingly mature, insightful young woman and see that I say these things because I care. A girl like you can have anything in life she wants. You are so beautiful, so talented that if you can go places others could NEVER go. You say this is a small slice of your life, yet it is what you are putting all of your spare time and energies on. It is what you think about, focus on and desire. What we desire and focus on is what we want most. It will change you to continue. In your diary years ago you were being hard on your mother for her behavior, yet you are becoming her. She wasn't always the way she is now, she had to start somewhere. And, no, I'm not a hit and run comment leaver. I have a diary here. Have for years and years. I don't have a profile because I had to make my diary private. This is because I've made mistakes that have changed my life and to be safe I've had to delete my profile. You think I don't know what I'm talking about but I do. I was exactly like you once. Then one night at a party at someone's house someone put something into one of my drinks. I thought I had just drank too much, but no. He offered to walk me home and I was stupid and thought he liked me, but no. He raped me. My first time and it was rape from someone I thought was a friend. I thought I was pregnant and had to finally tell my parents. You think you can hide forever? No, you can't. My story gets much worse from there, and more bad decisions and now I have an up hill climb to get where I should have been had I not been messing around. Had I been honest about who I was and what I was doing. Now, that is the last I will bother you. I didn't want to come in and take over your space or make you uncomfortable. But I had to try to say something because, well, because I care. I promise to leave you alone now. I cannot read anymore. I know what is coming. My best to you. Please be safe.
from skinnylizzie :
Oh, and I just read your entry which was basically what I was trying to get at in my note, except ten times better. As long as you're comfortable and happy with who you are, then that's all that really matters. Crumbs, this is coming out all wrong, there's no implicit criticism in these notes because hell, who are we to judge? Insert your own Tyra Banks-style 'you go girl!' quote here. And now I shall drag my inarticulate oafish self off somewhere else.
from skinnylizzie :
Ah you're right, I'm just having one of those despicable 'woe is me' days. Because self-pity is an important part of life! And yeah, some boys can be total nobs, but I guess we have to make mistakes to learn from them. Perhaps mistakes is the wrong word, but we have to experience things to grow. Perhaps I should be a life coach! Er, or not.
from buffylass :
Oh lovely, don't worry (and why yes, I am about to trot out my personal virginity-losing story too!). I lost mine, also at 17, to a boy who was technically my boyfriend, but who I knew I wouldn't be with for too long. And I did it primarily to get it out of the way. And it was the most rubbish sex I ever had ever, because first times are a total con. And don't let other people lecture you either, because mistakes happen and people mess up, and sex isn't the most important thing in the bloody world. To me at least, virginity isn't some incredible gift to give someone. Sex gets better with time; it is not fantastic from the start. Oh, and the boy in question sounds like a total twat, and I wouldn't waste any more time on him. Big hugs to you xx
from theswordsman :
Transatlantic (with a brief stop-over in Ireland) bear hug:)
from student-bum :
Aw, I wish I could give you a big hug. You sound a bit down about it, and it's not surprising. (I won't lecture you, I promise.) He sounds like a complete twatting cockface to say that after doing that. He is an idiot, basically. Please do not give him another chance, because you're far better than that. xxx
from skinnylizzie :
Oh boo. I totally wasted my first time on some nob who didn't deserve it, and I didn't realise until recently just what a mistake that was. I hoped things would turn out better for you in that department, and all I can say is that if somebody can turn around and say that to you after your first time, they're not even close to being worth the effort, no matter how much you like them. Sex is too important to waste on people who don't deserve to be getting any.
from duchessmoon :
This is so sad. I hoped better for you. You are so special. When I first started to read your diary I was amazed. What an amazing young woman you were! Different from the "regular" kids your age. Different in a very good way. Your insight and writing were so clever. I've read published writers not HALF as brilliant as you. You were so smart too with your words on not drinking and doing other stupid stuff that gets people messed up and off track. Then you started to drink and that all changed. Almost totally gone is your clever wit and insight. Now it's replaced with wanting that next drink and party. Now there isn't anything to set you apart from anyone else. Now it's all just typical. You once commented that this was the experience that would give you something to write about. No, these are the experiences that will change your life, and not necessarily for the good. These moments that are bad judgments due to an alcohol haze are the ones that will cause pregnancy or HIV. They are the ones that will break your heart and change you forever. They are the ones that cause shame and make others see you in a different light. You only get one good chance in life. Once you squander that it's all an up-hill climb. You are so very beautiful, so very smart and talented. So much better then to let some randy young boy use you. I hope you see that one day. I know these things because I made these mistakes.
from strawberrri :
oh claire! i lost my virginity at pretty much exactly the same age as you, to a boyfriend who treated me dreadfully, if it makes you feel any better.
from strawberrri :
not that i am condoning under-age drinking but why don't you sneak some vodka in a plastic bottle in your bag? then you can buy cokes at the bar and embellish them discreetly.
from theswordsman :
http://mckendree.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2207899608
from bitterwineuk :
I missed your last entry but I am so sorry to hear that. I agree with your views though, a foetus is a baby whichever way you look at it. I am not pro or anti abortion - it should be an individual choice but for me the moment I discovered I was pregnant there was no argument that was my "BABY" and I knew I would cope because things happen for a reason. Sending love and best wishes to all of you x.x.x
from buffylass :
Oh chicken, I'm so sorry xx
from randomrabbit :
I'm so sorry sweetheart.
from skinnylizzie :
I'm really sorry about your sister, I hope she's doing okay. My mum's job involves looking after women during early pregnancy and every time she tells me something sad like this I get upset, so I can't imagine what it must be like to have one of your family go through it. Sending you oodles of hugs on this rubbish wet Friday evening xx
from student-bum :
Aaw *hugs* I'm so sorry. Sending good thoughts your way x
from theswordsman :
I'm really sorry Claire.
from stepfordtart :
Hello dear. V sorry for your sis, having been through the same great pile of shite three times (twice before Jooj and once between Jooj and Treac). Its never fun. Even now, 10+ years later, I feel a bit crappy and sad about the whole business. Fingers crossed for happier stuff to come your way soon. s x Oh, and a ((hug)), too!
from vintagejunk :
yeah, i noticed it does the same thing in my browser too.. should change layout but there don't seem to be any pretty ones, and all the best Dland layout sites are dead :(
from stepfordtart :
My dad had a mini cooper when we were kids. In the 70s. I am old. : ( s x
from skinnylizzie :
I watched Russell Brand on Johnathon Ross the other night and they talked about a mouse living in his here...sometimes, just sometimes, I don't know whether to believe what comes out of his mouth or not (although I do want to believe that one very muchly). However, his verbal molestation of Daniel Craig was hilarious...you should have a butchers for it on youtube if you didn't see it, I have a feeling it may appeal!
from bitterwineuk :
if it's any help at all, the other day I was wondering what my life would have been like if I was actually born a giraffe. They seem to have so little problems. hahaha
from callmepearl :
i decided not to lock my diary after all, too much trouble - and i'm lazy. the new address is vintagejunk.diaryland.com, drop by if you're still interested!
from the-moo :
show me the tongue who me show me show me and convince me how much I NEED one.. because a lip piercing and a tongue one isn't too much is it? no it's IMPORTANT isn't it? I SHOULD get it done.. yes I should thanks for that!! hahaha I missed you xxx
from stepfordtart :
We get sparrowhawks killing stuff all the time in our garden. Silver cowboy boots are WAAAAY cooler. s x
from skinnylizzie :
Thank you for your note m'dear, I had indeed forgotten the healing power of mince pies and am off to rediscover them in a minute. And now I am all intrigued by this snogging issue thanks to Sarah's note!
from strawberrri :
oh and in reply to zoe's note, snogging someone with a tongue piercing is very groovy indeed!
from strawberrri :
gosh..! i went through a phase of wanting my tongue pierced when i was 15 or so but couldn't get over the scare-story of how some girl had had it done and her tongue had been paralysed, leaving her, quite literally, speechless for the rest of her days. glad yours is ok :) i would be eating a lot of ice cream i think. and avoiding things like vinegar.
from kanyooceemee :
you are very brave! it looks good.
from skinnylizzie :
I like it, it's groovy. But no solid food for a week?! That's my worst nightmare! Also, I am curious about what snogging is like with one in, because I'm afraid that's the only direction my mind goes in nowadays.
from student-bum :
ExCUUUUSE me, but Kendal is in LANCASHIRE. Hehe, sorry, I get defensive when people ignore the north-west... Nice piercing!
from stepfordtart :
I resolve to say *nuddy-pants* at least once in my business day tomorrow, when I am visiting two clients. Its a most splendid expression. Thank you for reviving it in my memory. s x PS Sorry about the break-up...but then, I always got the impression that you weren't that keen on him anyway. No harm done. Onwards and upwards.
from bitterwineuk :
er yes, it is something like that. But after a while you realise how much fun it can be. :)
from student-bum :
Ach, that bites :( but you seem to be fairly ok about it. And I doubt you'll be single for long ;) Enjoy the hat shopping...!
from skinnylizzie :
Oh bum, sorry to hear it's over although it's good that you were honest and all that jazz. On the bright side, at least you will be able to ogle hunky men without feeling at all guilty. Or lads in pirate costumes. Or lads in general, really!
from stepfordtart :
Fainting at gigs? Only good if you have spent an hour and a half screaming and/or crying, possibly whilst waving a banner which says "I (heart) whatever-the-lead-singers-name-happens-to-be". And are 12. Passing out at gigs? Good at any age. And cool. Im sure it was the latter you did, rather than the former. s x
from bitterwineuk :
:) I know what you mean. complete car crash tv. You expect it to be bad but can't stop watching. haha
from bitterwineuk :
STUNNED? would that be in a Rhydian is God way or a how the hell can he make a song originally by Pink sound so much like last weeks Phantom Of The Opera? I am a "I don't get Rhydian" person but my son loves him.
from bitterwineuk :
:) your story amused me!
from buffylass :
Ha, you kept your promise, and I officially adore you. She actually looks worse for the ceremony photos, as she's wearing this weird brown fur thing.
from stepfordtart :
Personally, I think thats the ONLY hair colour to have. Anything else is just dull. Me, you and Barbie, we've all got it right. The others are only jealous. s x
from theswordsman :
Hurrah for cave-girl outfits, particularly when short and especially when actually worn by females. Hurrah, I say.
from stepfordtart :
We used to have a "£2 max" limit on Christmas presents in our family - it certainly makes you resourceful! That was in the days when we were all rich (ie I was still married!) so we could afford to buy ourselves the good stuff with our own money, of course! The costumes sound fab particularly the cave girl. Fur costumes are the BEST. s x
from annanotbob :
Just found you today while drifting aimlessly round d'land and have to add you. Hope that's OK, x
from theswordsman :
Hey Claire. I'm not totally familiar with your educational system, but is there a chance that someone dropped History and you could get in at the end of the semester?
from buffylass :
Ha, okay as soon as my sister sends me some of the photos from the various wedding settings I'll post some. As long as you agree with me that Amanda's outfit isn't very nice.
from theswordsman :
Hey Claire. Great to see you updating regularly again. The next time dropping the class bothers you a bit, remember that you wanted history in the first place and you'd still be in that. It's the schoolocracy. I really like the two-tone hair in your Greek pictures, unless you didn't post that here and it's a confession I stalked your MySpace or something. Cheers and stuff.
from stepfordtart :
Nooooooo. Not a sports shop! Aaaarrgh. You'll have to wear sports clothes all teh time and you'll get stinky from all the manmade fibres and you'll have to wear your hair in a ponytail right up on the top of your head and people will be afraid to stand next to you in the bus queue on the way home cos they will think you are a walking asbo - You'll have to wear a big sign round your neck saying "work-clothes. dont normally dress like this." At least get a job somewhere where you can get a decent discount on Christmas presents. HMV? Wine Rack? Thorntons? s x
from stepfordtart :
Have him. He's too thin for me. I likes a bit of brawn. s x
from stepfordtart :
Ha! Now I had to google "james Mcavoy mr tumnus". Sadly, whilst he is indeed a fine specimen of caprine (!) goodness, he is, I fear, many many years too young for me and actually makes me feel a bit squirmy if I were to attempt to drum up any pervy lust for him. You may keep him all to yourself. Enjoy! s x (PS I get to keep anyone old enough to be your dad. Good trade?!)
from stepfordtart :
I had to google James McAvoy. I am either very very old, or dead, or both. Or maybe I live under a stone. Anyway, my really proper handwriting (with a PEN!) is a bit like your fancy schmancy font. *looks smug* s x
from skinnylizzie :
Thanks for your note! And bobble? You mad egg :)
from stepfordtart :
I have that hair that your friend down there just described. I do my own bloody roots after years of coming out of the hairdressers looking like an unwilling Gloria Hunniford. I have to force myself to go to the hairdressers. Its worse than the dentist. s x
from student-bum :
Remember: the hairdresser is your bitch. Make demands; it's your hair. I wish I listened to my own advice though, I let the hairdresser end up doing whatever she wants with it...
from skinnylizzie :
Didn't you think about kind of platinum blondey a while back? I've changed my stance on that ever since my friend Chloe had her hair cut short and dyed it platinum because she looks so bloody groovy that I'm half tempted to try it (not that I would, because my dark eyebrows would make me look like Slug Woman of the West). That would be fab. Except for the expense of keeping up with roots, obviously.
from stepfordtart :
I am impressed that you have a boyfriend with whom you do not intend to bump uglies. Kudos to the Shot-0f-Tea. Back in the days before the ice age (ie when I was 17), a girl kinda more or less HAD to sleep with ALL her boyfriends. I think it was the law, actually. Or maybe we just had no bloody idea how to say "Umm, no thanks". Also, we didnt know about scary stuff like Aids. And HPV. The worst that could happen was that you'd get pregnant but the boy would usually just roll his eyes and say "GOD! Are you not even on the pill? What are you? 15?" and then we'd go "No! Im 17 and 2 months ACKchewly!" and then we'd go on the pill. Boys were tossers back then. Have some more kudos. **kudos** s x
from skinnylizzie :
Oh yes, and I hope the boyfriend's home visit goes well!
from skinnylizzie :
Thank you! I think it went okay, but who the hell knows, eh? You can have a gold star for attempting to trawl through that mountain of photos; even the word obelisk sends shivers down my spine now. Never going on holiday with my dad again. Oh, and before I forget, I read one of your bulletins on myspace (when I wasn't shamelessly whoring off your quizzes - thanks for them by the way, they keep me amused in my unemployment!)...I hope things are as right as rain and not so hmm now. Or even just not hmm. I really hope that makes sense because trying to translate that into proper English might just finish me off. Toodle pip!
from buffylass :
Ha, thankyou, although I decided to not post the ones that were just a load of old durge, so don't be deceived. And yes, the giantness was a little overwhelming. And I'm glad that you're feeling better :)
from skinnylizzie :
Boo, I missed wishing you a happy birthday before I went away for the weekend, so have a very belated happy birthday on me! I also like your boyfriend's taste in perfume, good man.
from onlyemma :
I can understand those rubbish feelings so well, I'm so sorry you feel that way. And crying into food's never good! I'm sure everything will work itself out in the end, try not to worry xxx
from buffylass :
Oh bless you, that all sounds rubbish. Sending you big hugs xx
from stepfordtart :
That is, indeed, a Situation of High Suckitude. To compound it with a hangover is foolish foolish foolish. I have NEVER EVER put myself in such a situation. *ahem* ((((hug)))). s x
from student-bum :
Aw, poor you. Not much I can say but *hugs* really. I hope things sort themselves out soon. (And the note below me is right, the Phiolophers Song is very funny if you actually do Philosophy...)
from stepfordtart :
Hello dear! If you go over to annanotbobDOTdiarylandDOT come, you should find the "Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle" song. Might come in handy for those dull moments in Phil. lectures. Enjoy! s x
from snoopy-9487 :
Kind of late so therefore happy belated birthday! I hope you had a wonderful day!
from tarynheart :
happy birthday, crazy english lady! i know we do not know each other but you should be informed - your diary makes me laugh on a daily basis and it is lovely! so thank you for being so funny =D
from strawberrri :
happy beeday for yesterday claire! i can't believe you're 17. i was 17 when i started my diary and that was 6 years ago *cries at being haggard and old* glad you're a happy bean :)
from sunbeams100 :
Happy birthday lady!
from buffylass :
Big big BIG happy birthday!
from broken-in-nc :
Happy Birthday! Today is also my sister's birthday! Rock on witcha bad self!
from stepfordtart :
Hey! Happy Birthday! Oh, and if you really were that pissed during the buccaneer-snogging Id recommend the "DenyDenyDeny" approach. If questioned (by boyfriend, casual bystander, parent, whatever), just go "No i did NOT.....OMG I didnt did I?...Thats just terrible. I'll have to check with someone that was there. I couldnt have, could I.....?" and then look really worried, like you dont have total recall of the evening. It worked for me many times way back in the mists of time (ie when I was 17!). s x
from theswordsman :
Hi Claire. I'm a few hours early, but Happy Birthday!
from chibizuum :
BIRTHDAY you say?! Well happy...early that!! YAAAY!!! Sorry 'bout your ICT class though, but if the homework was bad then...you know I guess that might not be such a bad thing after all. BUT YEAH!! AWESOME.
from strawberrri :
NO it will not, essentially, matter if you drop IT - universities don't give two figs about AS levels if you're going to go on and get three good A levels (which you will, dammit!) the only thing is, when it comes to the end of year 12, it is nice to have the choice of which subject to drop. if you fuck something up majorly you can just sweep it under the carpet because you've got three others to fall back on. if you drop IT now you won't have that. heh i feel i haven't helped a bit! stick with it kidda but if you feel your other subs are going really well then don't pay too much attention to it :)
from bitterwineuk :
Oh I heard about that incident. I'm gonna have to look for it now. Still, was only matter of time. Good old Jez K! :)
from stepfordtart :
I think you did awfully well getting to the end of september without running out of 6th form clothes. By those, I assume you mean fabulous outfits which instantly render you cool and astonishingly attractive, rather than the old shit one normally wears at home when lying on the sofa picking ones feet and drinking orange out of the carton. Running out of suitable 6trh form clothes is why God invented charity shops. Get Thee To Help The Aged! I spent my entire late teens dressed as a 1950s debutante. Apart from my giant highlighted mullet, of course (it WAS the 80s!). s x
from stepfordtart :
I thought Aristotle was "a bugger for the bottle"....oh, no, hang on, thats a silly song, not actual really true fact. I think. I'll sing you the rest if I get drunk enough. s x
from buffylass :
Thankyou :) xx
from skinnylizzie :
Plato was a bigger wanker. I wanted to plunge my head into a vat of eels just so I wouldn't have to read any more of The Republic during my second year of A Levels. I feel your pain.
from stepfordtart :
My job at sixth form was working in a dry cleaners in a red-light district. I am sure you can do better than that! s x
from chibizuum :
GASP. I FAIL FOR JUST FINDING THIS DIARY NOW!! *adds*
from theswordsman :
Chimpanzees would have been better than my last three bosses. They'd still throw poo at you if they didn't like you, like my last three bosses, but there would be more laughs and that's what helps the hours fly by. I vote that you get the part-time job because orange boots are essential and nothing makes you REALLY appreciate a Friday night more than cashing your paycheck before you go out. Then in your free time, start working on your first novel so you can forget the job crap and live on advances. Are you going to keep your clock on the right time or mess with people's heads?
from stepfordtart :
Dont hang around with musicians. You will end up like me (and thats not good!). s x
from stepfordtart :
Hello! Is it OK for old people like me to add you to their favourites? I think I will anyway, but if you'd prefer me not to, do say so and I'll take you off again. s x
from student-bum :
Eek, only just read your entry for Sunday! Parents are a bit crap sometimes, aren't they. All I can say is "erm, what John said". I doubt that we're products of our parents, really, because sometimes you see things they do and think that it's stupid and you'll never do it. And I very much doubt you'll be a product of your parents, or indeed a product of anyone because from what I know of you you're not that sort of person :) Ok, I've rambled enough. I'm off to make a boiled egg.
from theswordsman :
Ouch. Rough day. I'm sorry you had to go through that. But you're not like that, and it's not your future. Maybe the way you've dealt with it all this time is part of what makes you special. Calling you normal would be an insult, because you're far above that. It might be a good incentive to make this your best year of school ever, so you can get away and only have to deal with the parents a few hours at a time. But for tonight, hang in there, and be good to Olivia, and know that you're going to turn out just fine. I promise. Take care. John
from theswordsman :
Second! I probably should have left an actual note earlier for it to count, but if you see how I've littered Holly's and Zoe's notes section today, you're better off without. Still let's bust a champagne bottle across the bow of this baby and wish the new diary bon voyage.
from theswordsman :
First!

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