messages to singlegirl:
(click here to add new message):
| from mozangeles : |
| Hey! I don't know why, but I recently logged into Diaryland for the first time in ages...and I noticed you updated not too long ago...but I don't know your password info. :( Are you still blogging? xoxo - jess |
| from portia12 : |
| Hi, I pop into diaryland now and again and would love to know your new blog address! Congrats on the marriage and honeymoon! :) |
| from polly-esther : |
| I'm still reading! I was happy to see an update and I'm so glad you're doing well. :) Jen |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Hey there! I'm still around! Sorry about the pregnancy issues, I'm sure you'll figure it out and will get there! Let me know your new address! xo |
| from horseshoes : |
| Congratulations on all of the great changes! I hear you on the baby stuff. We've been trying with no success either and its almost been a year. We're going to have to go in and get checked out and I'm not looking forward to it. Plus it doesn't help that freaking everyone is having a baby or pregnant right now. I'm happy for them but kind of tired of being asked "So when are you guys going to have kids?". Blah!!! Sending good vibes your way - wishing you the best!!!!! |
| from horseshoes : |
| Congratulations on all of the great changes! I hear you on the baby stuff. We've been trying with no success either and its almost been a year. We're going to have to go in and get checked out and I'm not looking forward to it. Plus it doesn't help that freaking everyone is having a baby or pregnant right now. I'm happy for them but kind of tired of being asked "So when are you guys going to have kids?". Blah!!! Sending good vibes your way - wishing you the best!!!!! |
| from portia12 : |
| How was the wedding? :) |
| from justagal : |
| Wow, wow, wow....what an update! I rarely, if ever get on Diaryland anymore. I am more of a facebook junkie. I started reading when you were living with Jeremy and followed all along. I am really happy things are working out for you. Lord knows you deserve it. Congrats a million times over! Janelle |
| from lardybutt- : |
| Hi Liz! I used to follow you way back when...but just recently came back to Diaryland. If you don't mind giving out the PW, I'd love to read you again! My email is [email protected] |
| from summerroll : |
| Wow! So many great changes! Congrats to you and Steve! It must feel so awesome to finally find the right one, after so many trying times. :-D K |
| from summerroll : |
| Hey Liz. Longtime reader. I lost your pw when I got a new laptop. I hope you don't mind sharing again. [email protected] |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Ahhh! I don't have your password anymore! Please send!! [email protected] or you can send me on FB! |
| from third-person : |
| Hi Liz! I read you a long time ago and have tried to follow you recently but there hasn't been a lot of activity. Is there a new place to find you? |
| from readnglst999 : |
| Where is clarity25? Recent vacation blog - http://twoshotsoftequila.blogspot.com/ "Eric's" Photobucket account - http://s795.photobucket.com/home/sketchbookshark/index |
| from horseshoes : |
| Yay, nice to hear you are doing well ;) |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Yeah, I don't get that whole "I'm in love with you but can't be with you", that's just bullshit. Be a real man and commit. Maybe you do need a bit of a break. I completely understand how you want to be in a relationship, but you're maybe not meeting the quality guys right now. I know you don't want to wait too long either. The whole being single thing really sucks! |
| from horseshoes : |
| What a turd |
| from razor-vixen : |
| I'm so sorry. I saw on FB that you'd changed your status, and hoped it didn't mean what I thought it did (but I guess it did). I know what you mean about thinking he's "the one" and it turns out, not. It's hard. |
| from portia12 : |
| Ohh! My favourite is the third picture down. You are a cute couple! Happy for you. :) |
| from portia12 : |
| Hee, looks like you had fun. Sexy mamas! |
| from lonelylatina : |
| Girl, you look so good in those pics! You deserve the best, so don't ever settle for less <3 |
| from horseshoes : |
| I'm sure you've heard it before but hang in there |
| from chillier : |
| That sucks that it ended but it's great that you ended it on your terms. Have you heard from him since? |
| from horseshoes : |
| Good for you! If he wants space let him choke on all of it that he can handle ; ) Something is odd in this whole equation where he "says" one thing and acts a completely different way. |
| from portia12 : |
| That sounds like a good strategy. My friend is currently reading "He's Not That Into You" and it might be worth the read to see if anything sounds like Chad. Does he actually want a relationship or not? Gah. Glad you had fun! |
| from portia12 : |
| I think you need to contact him more by phone. Through text message and email the other person does not get the nuances (especially not guys). My friend and I have had tiffs because we thought that the other was being abrupt in a text or messenger conversation. Sounds extremely frustrating all right! My friend has a similar issue with her bf and one way or the other you need some contact during the week to feel like you are not just having sex! And he's the one with the issue about not just wanting to have sex. Grrrr I am mad for you! Hope at least you have fun today. |
| from horseshoes : |
| With Brian, I just quit calling him when he pulled that crap and kept myself crazy busy so he had to make an effort to arrange a date. I gave him time to notice I wasn't talking to him. He came around once he figured it out and then all of a sudden he was "concerned". I do think that is crap that he cancelled on you last minute twice. If you wanted to be a jerk you should leave without him tomorrow night. Just let him get all dressed up and excited about going to the fundraiser and then when he calls when you aren't home, just never call him back and text the next day and say you got pretty busy. Not mature, but I think it would feel pretty good if he's just using you for the tickets. |
| from razor-vixen : |
| You are totally being reasonable. It's not too much to ask for a 10 minute phone call, even once a day if you're in a relationship. He can spare 10 minutes, I'm sorry, I don't care how busy you are! I don't know what to suggest, but really, you deserve better. |
| from summerroll : |
| I have refrained from commenting the past few months, but I honestly feel that you are trying to sabatoge your relationship with this guy. He's sounds like a great guy and someone that is a good match for you! Yes, he has some communication issues, but not every guy is going to be one of those guys that call all the time. I know that I'm not one of those girls. I think that over time he will probably get more comfortable with doing so and get better at it. However, I don't think it's fair for you to ask him to change himself to make you feel better when he hasn't placed those kind of demands on you (based on your entries). You can't go into relationships expecting people to change. You have to take them as they are, the good with the bad, and if you can't them move on. I say you give the guy a chance and not get so upset over things that are really miniscule, and if that can't happen, then at least be honest with him and break it off (or at least tell him you're back on Match). I think it was very telling that when you asked him if he wanted to date other people, he said no. The dude likes you and wants you! Give it a try. I certainly don't mean to be rude in anyway, as this is all my opinion, but I do think he could be a great thing for you. |
| from portia12 : |
| Thank you for sharing! Yes, he does sounds sincere! |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Kissing, holding hands, flirting, all would seem to be okay. I think I get what he's saying, he wants to spend more time talking, going out and doing things. Never a bad thing! Definitely not a break up. Are you not a phone talker? Maybe you need to call him sometimes (well, and he needs to call you too). |
| from justagal : |
| Totally 100% awesome ending of a night. You know where you stand, should have NO doubts how he feels about you, and should be thrilled he wants the whole package. Maybe this is the one? Love your updates, thanks for sharing so much!! |
| from portia12 : |
| Awww, you two are so cute :) |
| from chillier : |
| Yay new relationship! Definitely take a pic for us, and keep the details coming. |
| from portia12 : |
| :) |
| from razor-vixen : |
| I drank while on Wellbutrin, no big deal. It helped me quit smoking too! I didn't really see any help with the weight loss, but that was just me. |
| from justagal : |
| Update? |
| from horseshoes : |
| Brian was like that when I first met him. Go find something else to do and if he calls go with it. He just might be genuinely busy and may not realize that much time has passed. Brian was like that at first. His job is high stress and he would get wound up in some project and try to sqeeze dating me, his best friend and his family's projects all in with his job. He got really overwhelmed and didn't know how to manage it all and make everyone happy. It got better once we went out some more. The more we dated the more he wanted me with him and the more time he made for it. Granted, it took us 5+ years to get engaged. I lived at home at the time too so it wasn't a deal breaker for us, he was happier that I wasn't in debt up to my eyeballs over having my own place. Now that we're getting hitched he REALLY likes that ;) Hang in there and just chill, if he's that forgetful and doing that much "stuff" and has been a bachelor for a while it might take him some time to figure out how to fit you into his routine and some people just don't do that very gracefully. |
| from portia12 : |
| Oh, I wouldn't worry at all, because it hasn't been that long. Give it a bit more time...the weekend is not even up yet. He sounds wonderful. |
| from portia12 : |
| Glad to hear you are doing okay! |
| from horseshoes : |
| Now just channel all of that anger into something else! Sorry to hear about the break-up but at least it all fell through before you actually moved. Stop looking for someone and just hang for a while. It will get better, always does! |
| from jennifergwl : |
| You know what, be angry for a while and then move on. I've been reading your diary for a while and you became such a confident person when you started losing weight. It completely sucks what has happened, that you put all this time, energy and emotion into him, but you don't deserve to feel like everything is over because he's a jerk. And the whole "you shouldn't have asked me" thing, whatever that was just stupid to say. Take the time to heal and reflect on why this relationship pulled you apart. He is too much to stress over and you can find someone new, maybe more local. It will take time unfortunately! |
| from jennifergwl : |
| Regardless of what should be, you are being effected quite negatively by this relationship. His actions (or lackthereof) are not giving you reason to feel positive about him. If anything, it seems as though he should be giving you a reason to think moving all the way there is a good thing. Not just the promise of "things will be better". I know I can't speak for him, I don't know him or his life experiences, etc, but it just seems like this is way to much work for the chance of things getting better. I had a long distance relationship, I met him online. We were both very loving towards each other and made great efforts to communicate and even leaving sweet messages on each others voicemail. When you love someone, you think about them, care about them and let them know that. Even if he is with his daughter, he should be able to text you are the very least to check on you and say Merry Christmas. I think you have every right to ask him if you should really be moving out there because his actions are not giving you the answer. AND, never settle because you don't want to be alone. In a bad relationship, you will always feel alone, but it will feel worse because you will be feeling alone with someone there. Take it from someone who knows, it feels so much worse. I know you don't want to feel any worse, but if he can't give you the one thing that you NEED from him right now, communication (technology through texting makes this a very simple task). If he can't, he should give you a valid reason why he can't or he's just being thoughtless. I hope you can work through this and end up healthier on the other side. Since you've been with him, you've been down and in need of meds to not feel that way. Doesn't sound like a good start and the end result could be a lot worse. |
| from portia12 : |
| PPS-I didn't read the entry previous to this one before I responded. I agree with your mom. Have fun with your friends here. It would be good to let him know you are disappointed that he asked for the weekend off on such short notice. |
| from portia12 : |
| Oh that's very hard. You are worrying about the possibility of a panic attack occuring and that is very stressful :( I think it sounds like the relationship with Michael is a lot of work. I think we think that men put a lot of thought into texts and things but I don't think they do. I don't think it would register that there was a difference in your texts. Long distance relationships are hard and so is communicating complex emotions over text, instant message or email. I think you should go to where Michael lives for a six month try out. No pressure to stay. You could see if it worked and if not, move on. You sound like you have an excellent career field with many opportunities. You are so pretty and have a lot of friends. I know what you mean about Xanax, well maybe try herbal things first? Wishing you the best! (PS all these comments are from someone who doesn't have my life in order at all and I am going through similar things, but I think that there will be true happiness around the corner for us :) |
| from justagal : |
| I think you should ask yourself if you were able to switch places with Michael, what would be different? If you come up with a huge list, there's something seriously wrong. If you truly feel like he's doing everything he can and that you just don't like the current situation, I would agree with your mom. Easier said than done though, which I know for a fact. I just started taking Xanax and it has made a huge difference in my life. I don't take it as directed. I take a pill when I know I am going to be going into a stressful situation that will cause me anxiety. I now am wondering why I fought off the medicine for so long. Makes a big, big difference. It just takes the edge off. No foggy head. No drowsiness. No real side affects. Just a good feeling...kind of like you've had three beers. Good luck to you and I hope you get to see your sweetie soon. |
| from jennifergwl : |
| Always go with honesty. If you expect to have a good and decent relationship when you do live at least in the same state, you need to be honest even with something as simple as your feelings. Tell him that you are disappointed, that you miss him and want to see him and if going out to see him is the only way that can happen, then so be it. If he loves you and cares about you, there is no reason he should reject that offer. It's not a game, it's your love on the line, so don't play, be real. He has flaws as we all do and if procrastination is one of them, you will have to accept it anyway, right? I say do what makes you happy, go see him! Why turn it into a fight where you both end up miserable! :) Good luck! |
| from justagal : |
| I am so sorry this is happening. I would somehow mention to him that you are through making him your priority when he only makes you an option. You did the right thing. If your relationship means anything to him he will do whatever it takes to make things right. Good luck and hang in there. |
| from portia12 : |
| I think you did the right thing too. Call it the end of your relationship for right now at least. His email was very "me" centered. I think he's somewhat selfish but doesn't realize it. The phone thing was unbelievable. Anyone would know how utterly rude that was. And not eating breakfast with you when you were on a special trip to see him. I think he may not realize how some of his actions have affected you. Thinking of you. |
| from polly-esther : |
| I think you did the right thing. Based on your descriptions of his behavior, it seemed like he wasn't fully with you, and there was something about him that i didn't trust. Good for you... |
| from incog-notion : |
| hi stranger :) i just saw ur photos from austin. all my haunting grounds! don't u love the spazmatics? sadly they're corporate. anyway. just saying hello. if u move to austin hit me up :) ive been hanging out at linda.curious-notions.net |
| from justagal : |
| You two make an adorable couple. Great pics of you!!! |
| from portia12 : |
| Gosh you two are so darn cute! :) |
| from polly-esther : |
| Great pics. You guys look so happy and you're gorgeous! |
| from portia12 : |
| My friend is the same. We went to Old Navy. She's just lost a lot of weight, but her boobs would not fit in any bathing suit. I think you could get a tankini or bikini top in your top size and get bottoms in your bottom size. Some places you can buy separates. As for shirts, I asked a seamstress I know and she said if you buy shirts with darts down the front, they can be easily taken in under the boobs. I feel your pain! If it's any consolation, when you don't have much, one has a similar problem in that shirts have too much room for boobs. Also, being tall, I had too short pants all my life until finally long pants are in! So basically at age 27 I finally got a pair of decent pants! I just don't know why God can't pass out the boobs in a more equal manner! |
| from dieselengine : |
| That sucks that his family is making things difficult but the bottom line is this; you two gotta focus on you. If you show them that you believe in your relationship, they will too. BTW, I do ZUMBA 3-4 times a week and haven't lost an ounce but my core is tighter and I am a freaking dance machine now :) So you might not drop weight doing it, but you'll get tons of other benefits! |
| from lardybutt- : |
| hi =) I was wondering if I could have a pw? I used to read you all the time! |
| from incog-notion : |
| :) if u move to austin, we'd have to grab a drink downtown. i'm always there. |
| from polly-esther : |
| Hey girl, Did you change your password? I used to read at work and I left that job, and now I can't read your long-awaited update! If you have a second could you e-mail it to me at l@ws0n dot jennifer at gmail dot com? Thanks! |
| from justagal : |
| I'm so glad you've updated. Living at home will be a blessing in disguise when you move out and have a nice bank account to go with you. :) |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Welcome to the club of "being in your 30s & living with your parents"! I'm there with ya. Glad to hear all is well with you. |
| from jess1976 : |
| Where are you girl??!! I miss your updates. Just wondering what's new in your world! |
| from stillsingle : |
| You look awesome, girl. Congrats on the weight loss! I'm glad you had fun in Dallas. Chris and I went there a few years ago and we really liked it. We stayed right downtown and did the JFK Museum, too. Every time we travel we always say "we should move here". :) Glad to hear you're doing well! Have fun with all the boys! |
| from dieselengine : |
| Oh my GOSH! I was waiting for these before and after pics to finally be posted. You have to be beyond proud of your accomplishments. CONGRATS! |
| from justagal : |
| Way to go with your weight loss. Your before and after pictures are remarkable. Keep up the good work. You look fantastic!!! |
| from ticktrix : |
| GORGEOUS!! You look amazingly beautiful! |
| from portia12 : |
| You look tres skinny. Very cute top too by the way. |
| from portia12 : |
| Okay do you recommend getting the wax? I bought an epilator that rips out the hair and I really don't have the guts! I was able to do a little on my leg. I think my pain tolerance is okay. The wax is something I've wanted for a while but I'm so chicken! |
| from justagal : |
| You are totally taking the high road and should be so proud of yourself for doing so. It's the harder path to follow, but in the end you are standing up for what you believe in. It sucks that you had to make this decision, but good for you for sticking to your guns. |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Can I please have the password? I hope that all is well! |
| from munchlove : |
| Hi there! I used to read, but missed the day you posted your password when you were going to lock it up! I miss reading... I'd love the password if you wouldn't mind giving it to me :) |
| from portia12 : |
| Thinking of you! |
| from portia12 : |
| What a cutie! And you made out. Swoon. |
| from portia12 : |
| I think the same as your friends. His email sounded cautious. Stay cool as friends for now, and see how it goes. But if he emailed you right back after you emailed back he may have been feeling relieved that you weren't mad. Maybe just be cautiously optimistic. I can see what you mean, he does sound very nice. |
| from polly-esther : |
| Yeah, I agree with your friends. It seems like he likes you but wants to be cautious given that he broke up with someone recently. Who knows if/when he'll be ready... |
| from stillsingle : |
| Can you e-mail me your password? [email protected] I miss reading you!! Hope you are doing well!! ~Alicea |
| from portia12 : |
| Whenever I wake up.. put on my make up..I'll say a little prayer for you...Forever and ever.. |
| from incog-notion : |
| i agree with the girl below. add halo scan so the folks who have abandoned d-land and have different accoutns and leave comments! and omg! you're SO SKINNY NOW. beautiful. :) |
| from cardiogirl : |
| Oh singlegirl, you look SO pretty and so happy at that wedding. I love the black and white photo of the three of you. Hey, I don't mean to get on your case or anything, but maybe you could add some HaloScan comments to your page (they're free all you have to do is register and it will give you the code to add to your template). Then I (I mean all of us, nervous chuckle) could leave you messages about your recent post. Please? |
| from dieselengine : |
| happy big 3-0 to you! And I agree, you are WAY TOO TOO TOO HOT for that guy. FOR SERIOUS! |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Um, YEAH, you are SO way better than him! You are gorgeous! He's....beneath you. |
| from portia12 : |
| I sent you a congrats card on Hallmark. It's a bit silly so don't view it in front of people at work :) |
| from summerroll : |
| Congrats!!!!! So very proud. And you look very slim in those photos at the meeting. |
| from jess1976 : |
| Congrats! I am SOOOO proud of you. I need to go right back to WW after the baby is born - you give me a lot of hope. You look so fantastic - I love the full body shot of you accepting your award at WW - you look so skinny! |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Oh my gosh, that is so awesome! You do give ME hope as well!!! I need to lose almost that much. Damn, I'm starting my running program tonight!! |
| from dieselengine : |
| You will be 100lbs lighter by Saturday, I know you can do it! That is so awesome! CONGRATS! And a birthday coming up...we are both going to be 30 soon (mine is on the 22). |
| from portia12 : |
| I know you can do it! And you are not crazy! PS. you will look great beside your friends. :) |
| from incog-notion : |
| i think you look great and should be proud/keep up the good work/not be discouraged. u look great! embrace and celebrate that. |
| from portia12 : |
| You still look great. What's with the bride's expression? :) |
| from dieselengine : |
| Next to her insanely slim arms, anybody's arm is going to look horrible. Trust me on that one. Even like, Madonna's arms would look beefy compared to her's! So first of all, don't be so hard on yourself. You have come SUCH A LONG WAY. You are a few pounds away from celebrating a 100-pound weightloss. Don't let your arms get in the way of you enjoying that. And honestly, if it does bother you that much down the road you can get surgery to have something done. But in the meantime, enjoy how thin you are, all of the hard work you've put in to accomplish how awesome you look and don't compare yourself to others. And the Biggest Loser people? I've seen some photos of them now and it looks to me like quite a few have gained some weight back anyway... |
| from summerroll : |
| You actually look really good. So what, your arms are getting fit slower than the rest of you is? You look great and you've made so much progress. And arms are always the toughest to tone. Don't be so hard on yourself. Just keep it up. |
| from justagal : |
| You are being too hard on yourself. Everyone takes bad pictures from time to time. I bet the other pictures look fabulous, because you really do look great. Don't get discouraged. You're doing an incredible job losing weight. Your arms will tone up with time. The people on the biggest loser do nothing but work out for twelve hours a day. That's not realistic!! |
| from cardiogirl : |
| I am SO EXCITED for you and your Medium sized dress from the Juniors Dept.! Also for your shrinking bust. I've noticed the same thing (regarding my bust and weight loss). Except I've had three kids so when I am at my goal weight I'm kind of like a shallow B that "free-flowing" gives the oh so sexy appearance of a tennis ball in a tube sock. Trussed up it's not, how shall I say, so much of a trainwreck. I guess that was a little more information than you needed. Sorry about that. Congratulations on the weight loss!!! |
| from cardiogirl : |
| I had to laugh out loud at this part of your post: "But, I would LOVE to tell the girl who's standing next to me that a few people thought I looked the same size as her. She would probably kill herself..." |
| from jess1976 : |
| I have to agree with the other posters - you look the same size as the other girl, just to the left of you in the picture. You look so great and I'm so proud of you. I bet it feels awesome. I can't wait until I have this baby - I'm going to seriously start trying to lose weight - you are a motivation to me. |
| from cardiogirl : |
| I am totally with Jennifer. Same thoughts, maybe it's the angle but you looked about the same size as the girl directly to your left in the picture. I'm just wondering how tall you are. I am 5 foot 8.5 inches (yes the half inch is important to me) and I weight 165. I want to weight 145 again, but my medication is making it almost impossible to lose weight. My point is, I work out with weights and some of that is muscle. It could be that you are in better shape than you think you are. Congratulations on the dramatic weight loss and keep on keepin' on! |
| from jennifergwl : |
| Ok, I have to say that if you hadn't said which person you were in that picture, I would have been like "well which one is she?!" Seriously! I don't if it was the angle or whatever, but you like the same as any of those girls there! You are doing amazing! |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Hey~ I never leave comments anymore, but I just wanted to tell ya that that's AWESOME that you have lost all of that weight. I admire ya. I wish I could loose my weight I need to loose. And congrats on the job!!! |
| from polly-esther : |
| Congrats on the job! I did public relations for a university foundation until a few months ago. I have a background in the nonprofit sector too, having worked for the Red Cross and ActionAIDS. The money at those places sucked, but the foundation paid me more than I ever made in my life. I wasn't happy, though, mainly because my boss was absolutely evil. By the way, congrats too on your weight loss -- you look great! |
| from polly-esther : |
| Could I have your pw, please?! I didn't write it down when you posted it before. BTW, mine is callie/cat. Thanks! :) I'm at [email protected]. |
| from dieselengine : |
| First of all, congrats on the new job. Secondly, you look FABULOUS, that dress is super flattering and it shows off all the hard work you've done! I can't believe you are only 13lbs away from 100...that is AMAZING! I am sure you will be there in no time soon. You are unstoppable! |
| from lonelylatina : |
| 7/13/07 - wow, you look great! you can really notice the weight loss in these pics. i bet you look even better in person. you should be proud. congratulations! |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Fabulous pictures!! You are hot! And you need to get comments. |
| from lardybutt- : |
| congratulations on the new job!!! I'm sure it'll all work out...you look fabulous by the way. =) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Wow, that's big news! Congrats on the new job. I really hope you love it. Loving your job and making more money? Can't beat it. I work for a huge non-profit, so I get paid really well. But it's so corporate a lot of the time, and that drives me nuts. I sometimes wonder if I'd be happier at a smaller organization, but then I know I couldn't make the move because I'd be making sooooo much less money. Anyway, I hope you get the best of both worlds! |
| from summerroll : |
| Congrats on the new job!! Sometimes you need a little bit of a salary increase to make you happy, especially when you're in debt, and even for a piece of mind. And I had the same situation as you where I went from a very informal non-profit job where I could wear jeans and flip flops with a nice shirt to a more professional non-profit where everyone wore heels and ties (but not at the same time). but anyway, I just wnated to say congrats!!! |
| from lardybutt- : |
| could i have the pw pretty please? =) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Shit! I totally forgot your username/password! Can you email it to me? I think you have my address, but it's [email protected]. Thanks, man. ;) |
| from chillier : |
| Locked?! I'd love to get the username and password if you're giving them out. I've been reading you for years, I'd hate to have to go without :) You can email me at lngstoryshort at yahoo dot com, or leave me a note back. If not, miss you! |
| from justagal : |
| The user name and password you posted on your site doesn't work for me. Are both words capitalized? Congrats on 84 pounds lost so far. I know how hard it is and you should be so proud of yourself. You look fantastic! |
| from portia12 : |
| Are you going to see Gowan of Stix!? Please pinch his butt for me. |
| from horseshoes : |
| I went to Def Leopard last on Wednesday night. It was pretty good, have fun! |
| from portia12 : |
| Good for you girl! Keep up the good work! And yay for REO Speedwagon! |
| from summerroll : |
| Uh, what happened with Ben when "took him Home"??? Do tell! Details please! And congrats on the 84 lbs!! So happy for you that you were able to keep this up and that you are almost at your goal. |
| from portia12 : |
| LOL to the thought of you doing a walk off down the aisle :D Gosh, my co-worker and I love that show! Right now, Canada's Next Top Model is on and Mr. Jay is hosting! |
| from cardiogirl : |
| Funny you should mention the girl's personality vs. her looks. I had a friend in high school like that and came to the very same conclusion. It's sort of like when you work with someone who you think is really attractive and then find out they have a terrible personality. They cease to be attractive. The same is true in reverse. A stellar personality can overcome so-so looks. good luck on metamorphosis. |
| from dieselengine : |
| Oh my goodness...what a freak accident. I hope you heal up really soon! |
| from portia12 : |
| LOL You poor thing! HUGS and happy thoughts! |
| from jennifergwl : |
| WOW! Ok, so you talk like you had an airplane fall on your head, but you do not talk about what the felt like!!!! And I say this because when I read the part about the 10 lb bottle hitting your head, I instantly grabbed for my head. Two weeks ago I had to reach behind the computer desk because my 2 year old dropped something behind it. Unfortunately I paid no attention to the pointy part of the shelf that sits above the computer monitor until my head slammed into it. I instantly grabbed my head as if my head had opened up and my brain might fall out. Tears flowed and I was just in shock about how hard I just hit my head. I actually saw a white flash and had a hole indentation in my head with lines going out on three sides because I hit the point head on and the edges of the shelf implanted into my forehead as well. Seriously, how were you not knocked unconscious?! I hope they can fix that for you soon, it sounds pretty scary! |
| from portia12 : |
| Poor thing. Hope you're feeling better! |
| from polly-esther : |
| What the hell?! That's a freak accident if I've ever heard one. I hope you heal up soon... |
| from justagal : |
| I am sorry to hear about your forehead getting hurt. I do have to say though, your style of writing cracks me up. You are so darn funny when you tell a story. I wasn't laughing that you got hurt by any means, but when you wrote you felt like you got hit in the forehead with a baseball bat I starting laughing out loud at my desk. Hopefully your doctor can fix you up good as new. |
| from portia12 : |
| I'm very shy too. As soon as someone talks to me first I am fine. Maybe we should try making small talk. Force ourselves once or twice each time we are somewhere standing beside someone. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I'm so happy for your weight loss, that's amazing!! I'm on the weight-loss track right now, too. We started the Biggest Loser at work last week and I have a team of 3 girls that I can't let down. Also, we weigh in each week and if any of us gained weight, we all have to pay a dollar for each pound gained. The Biggest Loser at the end of the summer wins the jackpot. Motivating, huh? |
| from jennifergwl : |
| I TOTALLY see a difference in you from now and the photo of you with the white sweater and black shirt underneath. There is a big difference in your face. YAY YOU! And I love your hair. Course, this is coming from the woman that lives with a rat's nest on her head, so not so much a good frame of reference! |
| from portia12 : |
| Oooh, I love your sandals. You look great. |
| from summerroll : |
| Uhm, Jeremy is, for the lack of a better word, a fucktard. I hope you stay away. |
| from portia12 : |
| Oh and don't let the weddings get to you. There is no glimpse of an engagement ring in my near future either, and you should have seen everyone in my head office with their rocks. There must have been something in the water because they all got married at the same time. |
| from portia12 : |
| Maybe try internet dating? It worked for me and I am so shy in person that I found it really helped. I really think there is someone out there for you looking for you too! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Please don't go back with Jeremy! Argh! He treated you so poorly at the end, and I find it hard to believe he's changed that much in a year. I mean, maybe it would seem that way at first, but what about over the long-term? How could you trust him again? Anyway, if you want to bang him and just show off, I'm fine with that. ;) But don't get sucked back in. Also, maybe you should try online dating. It could be worth a shot since you're not meeting anyone at the places you hang out. |
| from portia12 : |
| Good for you! I first heard about Weight Watchers when Rosie was doing it and it seems very sensible. Getting fit shouldn't be about deprivation, it should be about getting to a healthy weight for a person. I need to drink more water too! I pledge to drink three more cups a day! |
| from summerroll : |
| You look so cute in that picture! I'm not a caffiene drinker, at all, so I was going to suggest to you Bacardi Razz (or any of their fruity rums)and Sprite. It's yummy. And then there's always a good ole Whiskey Sour. |
| from portia12 : |
| You look like the two actresses who play Marcia in the Brady Bunch. You are gorgeous and I'm tres jealous. |
| from jess1976 : |
| Wow girl - you look great! I didn't even realize it was you until I looked closer at the face - you are doing so great! I'm envious. How did you do it? I mean how did you stay motivated?? Seriously, I've tried time and time again to start a new diet or way of eating and it always fizzles out after a couple of weeks. You are a true inspiration! |
| from justagal : |
| Your face looks SO skinny in that picture. I don't even see a single chin...much less any double chin. You look fabulous!! |
| from horseshoes : |
| Good luck with your date! How exciting! |
| from incog-notion : |
| curly hair little makeup |
| from dieselengine : |
| I say go with regular makeup and curly-ish hair. From experience, I've learned that once you start off on a pimped-out impression, they think it is the norm and then you've got a lot of maintenence on your hands. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Yay! I can't wait to hear about this date! And I say go all out with the hair and make-up. If he has the idea in his head that you're ugly, then he's in for the shock of his life. ;) |
| from justagal : |
| Straight hair with going out make up. I can't wait to hear about your date....how exciting and what perfect timing. |
| from ticktrix : |
| Girl, you look good!! It looks like you have lost much more than 60-ish pounds. You're gorgeous! Call him and let us know how it goes. |
| from polly-esther : |
| You are beautiful. Don't tell me you can't see it. |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Call him tonight. Otherwise, that IS playing games. And you look really cute in the dress! Keep up the good work! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Are you kidding me? You look great! The difference is amazing - in your face, your waist, your hips. You are doing so phenomenal. Keep it up! And call Kyle tonight. You don't want to keep the poor boy waiting too long. ;) |
| from jennifergwl : |
| AMERICANSINGLES.COM THAT'S IT! LOL! Sorry, I saw that really stand out in the last note you have here and I remembered that is where I met my husband. Ok sad, that I don't remember! Anyway, on to why I am really here. Don't make him wait. You say you aren't playing games, but you kind of are. I mean he made you wait, so now you make him wait. You WANT to call him (despite the whole talking fast thing, I am the same way, VERY frustrating and annoying when people kind of stare at you with this "OW my brain hurts trying to figure out what you're saying" kind of look) and you WANT to get this thing going to see where it will go. Even if you are nervous, are worried, have reservations, you know you want to, so just DO IT! Making him wait isn't going to make him yearn for you you even more. He may be just as nervous as you and that could be why he waited to call you. You just never know what's going on on the other side, too. Anyway, that is my advice :) |
| from horseshoes : |
| I met Brian at americansingles.com. I haven't told anyone that we met that way. He hasn't either. We have a story that we made up together. Heh. Amyway, I would wait forever for Brian to e-mail back in the beginning. You can go back through my diary, I documented the whole dating experience. Part of the reason I made a profile was to snoop on my ex at the time and I ended up getting an e-mail from Brian and it went from there. Now here I am 3.5-4 years later. I bitch a lot in my diary but he is a pretty great person, I love him, and I NEVER would have met him otherwise. It always seemed that as soon as it was inconvenient to have a guy hanging around one always surfaced when I wasn't looking. It's weird how that happens. Good Luck! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Sometimes a blind date can be an uncomfortable situation too. Maybe he's not sure how to go about contacting you. Have you ever thought of signing up for a match.com or yahoo personals account?? If you were interested in dating, that certainly a way to get into the swing of things again. I highly recommend it. |
| from jennifergwl : |
| Ok my story. I met my husband through... ohhh boy I can't believe I forget the site, but anyway... it was a dating service, much like Match.com. We met online on January 21, 2001; met in person February 13, 2001; I moved to be with him on May 25, 2001; we were engaged December 24, 2001 and we were married on November 2, 2002! If you'd like the full story it's on my website http://jennifersdreams.com/wedding/ourlove.html During the time we first met online to the time I moved to be with him, we did a lot of talking on the phone and e-mail. So, most of our "dating" was done talking which I think helped things move SO fast. We said a LOT in that time period since that's all we were able to do when he wasn't visiting for a weekend. So, there ya go :) We now have two little boys and we're hoping to have a third. We shall see! |
| from dieselengine : |
| You should start feeling pretty because you ARE pretty! |
| from incog-notion : |
| adorable niece. ahahahah i laughed out loud. |
| from portia12 : |
| eeeee! I met my bf online. Couldya email it to me too? [email protected]. Thanks! |
| from jennifergwl : |
| Meeting a man online desperate? Maybe! However, I met my husband that way :) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Email me the profile! My email is [email protected]. And if he's getting his Masters to be a school administrator, he could definitely end up making some good money. Ted's dad was a principal, and his family is quite well off a result. But also remember that money isn't everything! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Oh and by the way... I'd love to see his profile. You can e-mail it to me at [email protected] Thanks!!! |
| from jess1976 : |
| I met my husband on match.com - best thing that ever happened to me. I always thought I might look a little desperate, until I saw how many people were on that site and how many people I actually knew in real life. I actually think it's better than meeting some random guy when you're drunk at the bar. Give it a shot - what do you have to lose! |
| from portia12 : |
| I can see a bit of a ressemblance. Her expression was priceless. |
| from dieselengine : |
| I use this self-tanner made by Coppertone. It is in a dispenser that reminds of me Mentadent toothpaste. It is a bit more expensive than other self tanners but it lasts a lot longer than most and it does not make me look abnormally orange or anything. On a side note, I went to WW the other day and there was a girl in class who reminded me of you. She had blonde hair and a really pretty smile and she had just reached her 50lb-weightloss mark. Weird! |
| from beckers-j : |
| I use Jergen's Natural Glow Daily Moisturizer. It's like a self tanner except that it's gradual, which means the likelihood of ending up with unsightly uneven spots is reduced. I had a few uneven spots at first, but since you put it on every day like a moisturizer, it's not that noticeable and then evens out. It took about a week of putting it on every day before I started looking like I had a tan. Now I love it! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Funny thing - I never actually had you on my buddy list, but I've been meaning to add you for the longest time. You're on there now. ;) |
| from jennifergwl : |
| I suggest keeping the new gym and if you get the same resuls or better than stay there. You may not have the info you want, but think if started there to begin with. You wouldn't know it anyway. (That of course only works if you are getting the same results) Anyway, that's my 2 cents worth of advice :) |
| from jennifergwl : |
| I see a noticeable difference in those photos! I think because you are looking at you that you don't see it as much as a stranger. I have GOT to get myself exercising. I have all the points info and everything! Keep it up! |
| from portia12 : |
| It's weird how weight looks different on different people. Like I'm 5-10 and 165 pounds and I wear a 12/13. Once I heard that Cindy Crawford was my height and weighe like 120. I think it all has to do with the size of your bones relating to your size. I agree about not going too skinny. |
| from goingloopy : |
| ...women lie like rugs about their weight, hence the reason that we're surprised when they're honest. Just take it a little at a time and you'll know when you're happy with what you see. And UGH for the lack of options on the dresses. Oh, one more thing...the dudes were checking you out because they thought you looked hot. It's not like you look all old or anything...you could BE 22. WORK IT!!! Heh. :D |
| from razor-vixen : |
| You are doing so awesome! Definitely inspirational. I know, I am always fooled by people's weights too. Lose the next 30, then see how you feel. You don't want to be so low where you constantly have to watch every little thing you eat, and can't enjoy yourself. Way to go! |
| from portia12 : |
| Wow, you look great! I can see the difference. You are so pretty! |
| from beckers-j : |
| There is definitely a major difference! You really look great, and I'm so impressed with your hard work. Yay! |
| from justagal : |
| WOW!!! I can see a huge difference. You look fantastic. I really like your hair darker. It makes you look more exotic. Way to go girl....keep up the good work. |
| from goingloopy : |
| There is a big difference, missy. I actually like the darker hair...brings out your eyes more...and I see no frizz. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. ;) CONGRATS on the weight loss...GO GIRL!!! |
| from dieselengine : |
| Congrats on the weight loss...and I can DEFINITELY see a difference in your face. I can't comment on the rest because there are only pics of your face! But great job. You are doing great! |
| from jennifergwl : |
| I Just wanted to say congrats on the weight, that is SO amazing and I am a little jealous! Ok a lot, but I really have no right to be since I am not even trying! Two kids will do that to ya, however I am sure that excuse won't work for long haha! Just wanted to say YAY for you and keep it up! |
| from summerroll : |
| Yay!!!!! Congrats and Keep it up! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Congrats on the weight loss - you are doing so great! Now post some pics!! :) |
| from incog-notion : |
| yayyy i'm proud of you |
| from summerroll : |
| Woah! Day-light savings is this weekend? It's a month early. Usually on the nights when the times shift, the bars down here stay open for and extra hour or so as not to confuse all the drunks. |
| from polly-esther : |
| Could you maybe say something to your mean co-worker? Maybe she's embarrassed and pretending nothing happened but I think she deserves to be called on her bullshit! About the time change, the time of everything like the bars closing, etc. will remain the same. It is confusing to me too and I go through it every year. Your cell phone time should change automatically. |
| from summerroll : |
| Don't get discouraged! The reason your weight loss has slowed is because you've gained more muscle, which weighs more than fat. So even though you're still burning off tons of the fat, you're also at the same time (with the weight lifting) adding tons of muscle, which unfortunately doesn't quite equal out in the weight loss scheme of things. But fortunately, like you said, more muscle means more efficient burning of calories. So don't get off track...you're actually doing great, and I'm glad for you! And tell Jeremey to shove it where the sun don't shine. |
| from horseshoes : |
| Wow I haven't read for a while and you have changed so much. So much happier and secure. Yay, for you! Maybe you aren't loosing as much weight now because you are gaining muscle? I would think if you are gaining muscle, and muscle burns more calories maybe you'll plateau for a little while and then start loosing again? |
| from dieselengine : |
| Wow! Congrats on losing the 40lbs....you are doing fantastic! I am so proud of you. You're a rockstar! |
| from summerroll : |
| Yay for shedding the Jeremy weight! And good for you for letting him know that you're happier without him. |
| from jess1976 : |
| You are doing so great! I'm so proud of you and happy for you :) If you decide to lock up, would you mind if I kept reading? If it's ok, can you send the pw info to [email protected] Thanks! |
| from goingloopy : |
| Looking hot...go girl!! And yeah. Jeremy can bite it. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Yay, Colts! ;) And you definitely do look thinner! You're going great. |
| from ticktrix : |
| You look awesome in the photos and I can really see the difference! You are starting to look like Lauren on "The Hills" - gorgeous! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Wow - 35 lbs. that's so awesome. I wish I could get there! Anyhow you look great!! |
| from summerroll : |
| 35 lbs! Congrats! You can definitely see the difference in your face when the superbowl pics are compared to the one from New Years. And I did think of you as I rooted for the colts last night (and that know I know what Payton Manning looks like without a helmet :D ) |
| from justagal : |
| Looking good! You should be so proud of yourself. It's so darn hard to lose weight!! |
| from summerroll : |
| Everyone knows who Bobby Knight is because he was a badass! You always know the badasses. As for Peyton Manning, I know who he is and some of his stats, but I wouldn't know what he looked like without his helmet. I think I recall seeing one or two commercials with his name on the bottom, but that's about it. But we still have tons of Dan Marino commercials, and he's been retired for years. |
| from crowhihs : |
| The Peyton Manning commercials are all over TV here in California :-) |
| from stillsingle : |
| Congrats on the weight loss - man, I admire you! I've been really trying to get back into exercising and eating right and it's SO hard! I would love to lose 20 lbs before the wedding and that's 9 months away and I just feel so frustrated that I don't see any results after exercising and watching what I eat. Maybe I need to join weight watchers, too. |
| from sank0fa : |
| congrats on the weight loss!! i did weight watchers with my mom the summer after freshman year of college and lost a good 20 lbs or so. it's really amazing. i tried it again my senior year, but wasn't as disciplined that time around (i blame my foodie/alcoholic friends!). keep up the good work!! reading about your progress is inspiring me to get back on the horse and maybe i can lose at least 10-15 by valentine's day!! (extra incentive, i turn 24 the day before....eek!) |
| from icyjewel : |
| Wow, congrats on your weight loss!!! Keep up the good work. :) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Congratulations! You are doing fantastic! ;) |
| from razor-vixen : |
| AWESOME! You go girl! |
| from dieselengine : |
| Congrats on the weight loss! That is awesome! and the fact that you succeeded during the time most people GAIN weight says a lot about your willpower and focus. Good job! |
| from sank0fa : |
| i like your myspace story about your crush. haha (i get giddy about those kinds of things, too). i have a goal similar to yours....except i want to lose 20 lbs (at least?) and then "accidentally" run into my ex. i don't actually want him back or anything....just want him to be amazed at how incredibly hot i am now and kick himself for letting me go. (okay and then maybe have some reunion sex and ditch him right after, just for some extra sting). OH...ps..this is the former "kimberline" -- new start, new year, right? :-) |
| from goingloopy : |
| You should just fuck him now. Once you get to where you're going, weight-wise, you'll probably either (a) have many options for sport fucking (not that you don't have them now, but you will be more self-confident and therefore will SEE said options) or (b) be interested only in fucking those who might be long-term relationship partners. You need to get laid now, and he's there...just don't get attached to him, and things will be fine. PS-congrats on your weight loss, and you are beautiful no matter what size you are. Keep up the good work and have some damn fun while you're single! ;) |
| from incog-notion : |
| oh and i agree with jess, but only if you dont rotate. u can work out every day if you rotate which muscles you're working. there's your loophole! |
| from incog-notion : |
| ug. i used to do 2 hours a day at the gym only because my evil ex would spend 5-6 hours a DAY... and i havent worked out regularly since we broke up because i associate the gym with him..... not healthy. |
| from dieselengine : |
| I mostly do the Arc Trainer or elliptical for 40-60 minutes, then I do some weights and then I jump rope for 5 minutes, lunges and some ab work on the ball. I try to mix things up a bit on the machines; change the resistance or try a program. I also do a class once in awhile to keep things interesting. Sometimes on the Arc trainer, I will grab the 3lb weights and hold one in each hand while I work out. It makes a huge difference! There is no problem doing the same type of cardio every time you work out, just change it up by doing it at a difference pace or resistance or something. But I highly suggest jumping rope. You burn a minimum of 10 calories per minute and it tones your whole body! |
| from mozangeles : |
| You are exercising way too much, girlfriend. Paulo studied sports medicine, and if he knew that you were working out 5 days in a row, he would be appalled! That is in no way, shape or form, good for your body in ANY way. Your body needs to rest after a workout like that (an hour, burning 1,000 calories), and by going back the very next day and repeating, you are doing more damage than good to your body. It's good to work out, 3-4 times a week, but you need to space it out more. Sorry to be the Debbie Downer of this situation, but I am concerned! It's not healthy...are you training for the UFC or something?! xoxo - me |
| from summerroll : |
| Ah, 7:00-3:00 is my optimal work schedule. But my boss will only let me work it once in a while. Have you thought about trying power yoga or kick boxing? The yoga is great because unlike regular yoga, it actually feels like you're doing cardio for a full hour, with the weights intergrated (you're always using your own body as the weights and counterweights). You start to get toned really quickly from learning to hold yourself up, which is good because the muscle you have the more fat you can burn. Plus, you always end with stretching and relaxation for 10-15 minutes (my fave part). I love getting gift cards. For christmas, I actually got about 3 more, including one to the grocery store, which I was most excited about. I also got a vaccuum cleaner, which I desperately needed because my kitty's hair is starting to take over my condo. I'm so glad you had a great Christmas with Hannah (post more pics!). I wouldn't worry much about your friends' engagements. We all feel left out or left behind at some point; I feel that way all the time. But like you said, you're a good person and your time will come soon. |
| from portia12 : |
| Ohmigosh, some people don't have a clue! If that girl had said that to me about her tube top problems I would have gagged! I am similar in that I tend to compare myself to others and gage my success by how I compare with others. But really, this isn't the way to go. I too am having relationship woes and others can't understand. Take heart that my friend v who was emphatic that she would never find someone found her soulmate a small time later. Sometimes when you aren't looking there they will be. As for your friends, one or two should have the je ne sais quoi to realize that they should stay in with you if you don't feel like going out. As we are in our late twenties, early thirties, why can't the girls meet for wine at someone's house once in a while. Hang in there, I am jealous how you are getting fit. To show my support I will go to the gym I have not been utilizing regularly until my membership's up. If I can stop making excuses :P |
| from incog-notion : |
| :)! |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am so proud of you for the weight loss! I always thought you were gorgeous, but I know that it gives you much more happiness and self-confidence to get healthy. Kudos to you! How are you doing it? I am doing Weight Watchers right now, and it's going sloooooooooow as molasses. xoxo - me |
| from goingloopy : |
| Yes, get back on the antidepressants...they will likely help. I hope you can get to the point where you stop comparing yourself to your friends...they may have some things, but you have others. For all you know, some of them envy the fact that you're single and free and able to do things like work on your appearance and chill out and go to bed when you want. Be truly happy for your friends...and be truly happy with YOU. It seems like, at least for me, I only find what was lacking after I stop thinking something is lacking. (I hope that makes sense.) CONGRATS ON YOUR WEIGHT LOSS! :D |
| from stillsingle : |
| Of course you can go dateless to a friends wedding if you're a bridesmaid. I did it a few years ago and ended up going to a hotel afterwards with her neighbor - ha ha!! That ended up being a bad thing in the end and very uncomfortable, but who knows? Maybe it could end up good for you! Your niece is adorable - mine is 3 months old now - I love nieces! Happy Holidays!!! |
| from incog-notion : |
| i like it when you update. update more please? and 15 lbs is a solid achievement. don't be discouraged. |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Yeah, you can be a bridesmaid & not have a date. I've done it five times (how sad is that). It's actually a little easier than having a date, because he's not left alone a lot while you're doing your b-maid duties. |
| from summerroll : |
| Hey! Glad to hear that you're doing well AND staying away from Jeremy. Believe me, I know it's hard when you want the company (and the sex), but in the long run, you'll be glad you kept him at bay. And I wouldn't worry about going dateless to the wedding. Most people at weddings are dateless anyway; it's really not that big of a deal. Anyway, I hope you have a great holidays! |
| from justagal : |
| Merry Christmas!! |
| from dieselengine : |
| I was a bridesmaid in my friend's wedding and didn't take a date. Honestly, it was easier to NOT have a date because I was busy with photographs and bustling her dress and this and that...it was nice to not have to worry about if my date had somebody to sit with at the reception, etc. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I felt that same way when I was single, too. I hated my friends (especially the ones that had boyfriends or husbands). I think it's an age thing, too. I'm 28 and I don't go to clubs or bars anymore. I quit doing that when I was single, too. I tend to go to bars if there is a live band playing, but I don't go clubbing anymore. When I was single, I had found a group on Yahoo Groups for singles just to get together and see movies with or go shopping with. They had groups with just girls or a mix of girls/guys. I actually met a really cool guy from one of those groups that I stayed friends with for a while. It might be worth checking out if you're looking for a change. |
| from jess1976 : |
| I can totally relate to the getting older and having less to do thing. My friends and I get together once or twice a month and that's it. It started once everyone started getting married and really changed when they all started having babies. It kind of sucks but I guess it's a part of getting older. You realize that many of your "friends" become acquaintances and you keep a few good friends if you're lucky. My girlfriends and I have a girls night once a month and we have been taking turns hosting - so far it's working out good. PS - if you lived closer, I would totally hang out with you :) |
| from polly-esther : |
| Random question...I signed up for a Flickr badge like yours and it's not letting me tag my photos so they show up. Did you have this problem? P.S. - Jeremy is a loser! |
| from dieselengine : |
| Congrats on the 3.8lb weight loss! This is definitely the beginning of many great things for you. And your niece? I want to steal her too! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Congratulations on having a new niece! I'm so sorry for the loss of your grandmother. |
| from summerroll : |
| Sorry that you lost your grandma so suddenly. But as they say, when one door closes, another one opens, which is the opportunity for you to now be a great aunt to the new addition in your family. Everything will be okay; you'll make it through. |
| from polly-esther : |
| I'm so sorry. You lost your grandfather not so long ago, too. Hugs... |
| from mozangeles : |
| I'm really sorry for your loss. xoxo - me |
| from jess1976 : |
| So sorry to hear about your grandma. I can totally relate - I remember how devistated I was when my grandpa died. The only thing I can say is that I'm sorry and that you will feel better as time goes on. I'm sending bunches of hugs your way! |
| from goingloopy : |
| Congrats on your work success, and Clyde and George are the cutest. pair. evah. AWWWW. |
| from summerroll : |
| Congrats on the new addition to the family!! George looks adorable, and it's great that he and Clyde are so close already. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Great pics! It looks like you had so much fun! Yay! ;) |
| from formerlymr : |
| You all look like you had a GREAT time. Awesome. |
| from summerroll : |
| It sounds like you had a great time! Can't wait to hear the rest. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Just catching up - hope you have a great time in FL!!! |
| from summerroll : |
| Have fun! That area is awesome! |
| from prolifique : |
| I'm sure you'll be fine. Good luck, and HAVE FUN! |
| from dieselengine : |
| Sid is a miniature pinshcher or however you spell it. He is 100% pure bred. I think that Clyde has softer features and prettier markings...Sid is small and hyper and pointy and very excitable. Clyde seems more laid back and cuddly. I think they look different...their colorings are a lot alike but other than that, they look different to me. |
| from dieselengine : |
| I think Clyde is cuter...he is more filled out. Sid is kind if pointy-looking. What kind of dog is Clyde? |
| from saveahorse : |
| Don't let that email bother you! You are way better than him and I was happy to see that you stuck up for yourself. You are a great person and he never deserved you. Take care! |
| from razor-vixen : |
| I am big too, I've never had a problem with airplane seats. I'm about an 18 as well, no troubles. I think I measured myself correctly, at the high end of 18 inches, but it's still okay. I think you'll be fine! |
| from dieselengine : |
| You are. Right. He doesn't. Form sentences very. well. |
| from chillier : |
| I HATE when ex's act like total tools and pretend that they've completely changed or found God or some stupid shit like that. Your email to him was awesome. He deserves to be told what a dickhead he was to you. |
| from janetplnetoc : |
| I wear a size 16w or 18w and I fit on airplane seats. I mean, there's not much room left over but i'm not spilling over the sides. |
| from beachbride06 : |
| GIRL!!!!! I havent been able to get on this site in ages! GO YOU With the lettesr/emails... When i read the one part about how he wante to be baptized and one wiht god (i gagged) I really did gag... seriously! I give you so much damn credit! You are beautiful and fabulou and i hope you and "TAD" work out, or just have fun in the meantime! You rock and email me anytime! :) Miss ya liz! |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am one of those bigger girls, and while I do not have an ample ass, I have a flat, wide asian ass, which measures close to what the airplane seats say as well. And I fit just fine. Do not fret, m'dear! xoxo - me |
| from dieselengine : |
| you are so awesome! When I read that last email I had a big ole smile on my face because you stuck up for yourself and told him like it was. GOOD FOR YOU! I am so proud of you...you are so liberated and independent. You are how a lot of girls only DREAM they can be. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry to hear you're sad...it will get better. I was like that, too, when the ex and I broke up (you can read through my archives), but something has to change. You either need to change your life or change what type of guys you are looking for. I had to make that change, too. I went from a drummer, alcoholic, drug-addict, social butterfly, life of the party guy to a guy who likes to stay at home, doesn't drink or do drugs, is intelligent and treats me better than any guy has before. A light will eventually turn on inside you and your life will change for the better. You just have to find the switch. :) |
| from beachbride06 : |
| i miss my lizzers!!!!!!!!!!! muah! xoxoxoxox |
| from incog-notion : |
| i wish i could forget the ex too. completely. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Get over it! You are totally going to fit into the airplane seat. xoxo - me |
| from lonelylatina : |
| 8/31/06 - LoL..you know you're trippin' right? i'm 5'9" and weigh 60 or so more lbs. than you and i fit perfectly well in a seat. i didn't need an extension on the seatbealt either. but i totally understand where you're coming from. take care girl and i hope you go on your trip and have a blast <3 |
| from incog-notion : |
| i loved being single/living by myself/being by myself. i had a pretty happening social life WITH the ex and couldn't imagine it being that thriving as a single girl, but it's actually 10 x's as busy and fulfilling.... also love my hobbies. |
| from summerroll : |
| I went to Ft. Meyers this summer for one of the week long fieldtrips with our students. It was awesome! So beautiful out there. You should see if you can spend a day in Cayo Costa. It's an uninhabited island with 10 miles of beach; absolutely gorgreous. And you can only get there by ferry (it's not too expensive, but it's definitely worth it). Don't worry staying home all the time. I basically have the same routine as you: work, work out, eat, TV, sleep. And at first, I thought I was a bit pathetic, but I still hang out and talk with my real friends at least once a week, and that's all I need. Like you, I'm just waiting for the next phase in my life to come along. And it will eventually. And Yay for 10 pounds! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Hi! Thanks for the note on the engagement! I'm happy to hear you are in your new house and Jeremy is out of your life...he really is a loser, reminds me SO much of my ex, Jay. Ick! You'll find someone who truly deserves you! In the meantime...hang out with the girls, drink, dance, party your ass off...and enjoy your new home!! |
| from summerroll : |
| Where are you going in FLorida? |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Hey girl, I'm a bigger girl too, and?I just flew like July 12, andit was fine, I was a little cramped with the side things down, but it wasn't that bad at all. Just get a seat by the window, and then get one of your skinny friends to sit beside you. that's all. You'll be fine |
| from dieselengine : |
| Three words: cabbage soup diet. If I feel like I am putting weight on, I would do this for a week and easily drop 5lbs. And I really don't have a ton of weight to lose. Some people are known to drop 10lbs in their first week...it is one of the "safer" crash type diets because it is all fruit and veggies. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Are you sure you won't fit into the airplane seat? I know it's cramped (I am a big girl), but I don't think you'll have to worry about fitting! xoxo - me |
| from third-person : |
| My dad dropped a ton of weight during his first few weeks on the South Beach diet. You have to give up carbs completely, but it really works. |
| from incog-notion : |
| slim fast should work cept when my brother tried it, he ended up eating in addition to the shake your'e suppose to have because it doesn't fill you up at all. eat very low calorie foods... wow chips, popcorn, drink lots of water, cut out your salt, and work out. everyday. cardio. walk, walk, walk. |
| from justagal : |
| I lost 43 pounds on the slim fast diet pretty darn quick. I drank a shake for breakfast and lunch, and had a low fat dinner. Pretzels and fruit for snacks in-between. As soon as I stopped doing it, I gained it all back. But it does work quickly. |
| from incog-notion : |
| i talk about my ex alll the time. i dont think that means i'm not more than less over him, it's just that it's recent and a big portion of my frame of reference. i'm proud of you.. even if it took humiliation.. whatever it takes to get him out. |
| from janetplnetoc : |
| Most of us have a Jeremy in our lives somewhere... |
| from incog-notion : |
| i remember when you really really wanted a house and didn't see it ever happening soon. LOOKIT. and you're right. lowlife piece of shit. good riddance. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Congrats on the new place! And I hope that finally Jeremy is out of your life for good. It's about goddamned time. xoxo - me |
| from summerroll : |
| Congrats on moving into the new place AND on moving past Jeremy (finally)! I'm glad you were finally able to see him for what he was. I know it hurts that he was the one to drop you, especially after all the shit + 100 you've done for him, but think of it as if he did you a favor. You can start over in your new house (yay for a backyard!) with none of his bullshit to hold you back. I think htis is the beginning of a good things to come for you, sweetie. |
| from dieselengine : |
| Yay! I am glad you are back, are refocused and I am glad he is GONE! FOR GOOD! |
| from razor-vixen : |
| Dumb stupid jerk! I should come down there and punch him in the throat for you! |
| from incog-notion : |
| hi dear. i unlocked. i locked it temporarily to edit a monster of an entry. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Everybody gets rejected, sweetie. Don't take it so seriously. At least you're putting yourself out there. I think you owe that to yourself - to see what else the world has to offer before you decide to just 'settle' for Jeremy. That way, if you ever did end up going back to him, it would be for the right reasons rather than because you're lonely and feeling rejected. And you could meet someone fantastic in the process and never go back to Jeremy at all. The point is, you should take this time to explore. And don't focus on the rejection - focus on the fact that you're being brave and taking chances! That should be applauded. ;) |
| from chillier : |
| I feel for you with the embarrassing moments. They always seem to come in a big clump, don't they? But seriously, don't get back with Jeremy just because you're struggling a bit. You need to be sure that it's him you want and not just the security of a familiar relationship. You are NOT hideous, you are beautiful, and these moments will make you stronger. |
| from beachbride06 : |
| OMg i love you LIZ!!!!!!!!!!! could we seriously live closer togethre, you are amazing! let schill sometime before we end this................ I LOVE YAA |
| from portia12 : |
| Gosh, you are beautiful. I wish I was as pretty. Men! Anyone who was shallow would be beneath you anyway. A true man will love you for you. |
| from formerlymr : |
| Beautiful girl... it is always darkest before dawn! And I've embarrassed myself a million times during my vulnerable times. The fleeting moments are nothing compared to one big broken heart that Jeremy can never (nor deserves) to mend. HANG IN THERE. Hugs- Madison |
| from goingloopy : |
| Hooray! And fuck packing boxes till you have to. Boxes suck monkey ass...much like torturing yourself by seeing your ex...but you knew I'd say something like that. ;) However, I do understand needing to get laid...so just make sure you are protecting yourself, both physically and emotionally, ok? |
| from summerroll : |
| I'm glad everything worked out! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Just wondering what was going on... hope everything turned out ok. |
| from justagal : |
| What's the verdict? Did you start yet??? |
| from spoildangelz : |
| I think you should wait another week and see...don't worry about it yet until you're sure. However, I could understand why you would worry...you've got all the classic symptoms. When I got pregnant, I took the test after I was late for a week. Deep in my head, I "knew"...but I tried to push it in the back of my head. Everyone was telling me I was pregnant before I even admitted it myself. But...those symptoms are the same as mine...queasy around food or the smell of it...tired all the time...feeling "weird" in your belly...anyway, good luck and I hope all goes well with you! |
| from incog-notion : |
| i'm praying. i have the opposite problem right now. period wont stop. going on month 2. if i could somehow transfer it to you, i would. |
| from geekgurrll : |
| Just wanted to say that I hope everything turns out okay. A test from a doctor will determine if you are or aren't and then you can take it from there. Take care. |
| from summerroll : |
| I got to this entry late, but I also think you should wait a week, take the test again, and if you still feel "weird" go to the doc. But try to relax. I just went through this with one of my cousins and she started having really awful panic attacks (which she'd never had before) because she thought she was and wouldn't believe the tests. But she took the same advice I'm giving you and worked through it. You will too. I'll send good energy your way. |
| from dieselengine : |
| if you think you are, you very well could be. But I would wait till next week and go to a doctor for a formal test. I know waiting that long will seem like an eternity, but it will probably be more accurate that way. |
| from beckers-j : |
| It sounds like you could be, but you should go to the doctor and find out. There's no point in jumping to conclusions and stressing out over it until you know for sure. As for the abortion, you do what's right for YOU. The fact that you CAN provide for a child doesn't necessarily mean that you SHOULD. Good luck! |
| from jess1976 : |
| I would go to the doctor or planned parenthood and have a blood test done. |
| from justagal : |
| Go to the doctor for a blood test. |
| from goingloopy : |
| GO TO THE DOCTOR and find out for sure. They can do a blood test. Then you can figure out your options. I'm not sure about the antidepressant thing...I never heard that, but I've always been kind of weird cycle-wise when I'm not on the shot. And if you need to e-mail, feel free. **hugs** |
| from dieselengine : |
| thanks for the tag...i will get to it tomorrow...tonight we are installing a new computer. WOOO HOOO! |
| from formerlymr : |
| I'm tagging you. Details in my diary. :) |
| from portia12 : |
| I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather. He's in heaven. It must have been very upsetting but at least he wasn't alone. |
| from summerroll : |
| So sorry about your grandpa. I know he meant a lot to you. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your grandfather. Take care hun. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm so sorry for your loss. I don't even have the right words, this entry was heartbreaking. Try to take comfort in the fact that he is in peace now and that you were there for his final moments. I'm so sorry. |
| from jumblygiant : |
| that's awful to hear. hang in there. |
| from polly-esther : |
| I am so, so sorry. That must have been so hard for you and your family and especially for your grandpa. I hope you can take comfort in the fact that you got there at the right moment and that he was not alone... |
| from beckers-j : |
| I'm so sorry about your grandfather. If he was aware of what was going on, I'm sure he was very grateful to have all of you there by his side. |
| from dieselengine : |
| I am so sorry to hear about your grandpa and I am so sorry you had to see him pass. But the nice thing to know is that he was surrounded by people who loved him when he left the Earth and while it might be disturbing to you, I am sure it was a comfort to him to know that family was there. Like you said, his eyes followed you around the room...he was watching you and glad you were there I am sure. |
| from jess1976 : |
| I'm very sorry to hear about your grandpa. I remember when my grandpa died last year, it was a similar kind of shock. While he was sick for a good year or two, we never expected him to go the day that he did. I feel better in knowing that he is feeling much better where he is at, then he was when he was down here. |
| from pissymystic : |
| Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I only just got caught up on your diary because I've been so wrapped up in my own life. What a horrible thing for you to go through. *hugs* I wish I could help. |
| from vla : |
| I'm so sorry about your grandpa. That must have been really difficult. |
| from dieselengine : |
| that was hard for ME to read, I can't imagine how hard it was for YOU to read...but the good news is, you two have said good-bye and you are pointed in the right direction to move on. It will take some time and some tears in between, but I think this break-up has put you two in a better place. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Congrats on renting the house! It looks adorable, and I'm sure you and Clyde will be very happy there. It's great that you're moving on as well. ;) |
| from jess1976 : |
| You know what I got from that e-mail..... blah, blah, blah, blah. It was nice of him to say those things, but I would find it hard to believe if he was being sincere or not. Now is your time to move on and find someone who is perfect for you! HUGS!! |
| from justagal : |
| Outstanding email. Especially the last line. |
| from jess1976 : |
| Very well said - you seem like you are doing much better! |
| from dieselengine : |
| I'm glad you are back on d-land again. What he said about you was wrong; plain and simple. If he had a problem with you, he should have told you first. But it is over with now and you are moving on! |
| from formerlymr : |
| It is so good to hear you happy and excited. You deserve the good stuff!! Hugs, Madi-Rae |
| from summerroll : |
| The new place looks great! And I'm so happy that you get to keep Clyde. I want a dog so bad, but I want to wait until I have a backyard first. And yay for the niece! It's wonderful that things are starting to turn around for you now. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| amazing house. it's beautiful inside with the fireplace an vaulted ceilings. good find! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Congrats on the house - it is really pretty and sounds like it's going to be really great for you! |
| from mozangeles : |
| Awww Liz, so sorry to hear about Reggie. I know how hard it is to lose a pet. If you need any support, I am here for you. xoxo - me |
| from summerroll : |
| So sorry about Reggie. Feel better. |
| from goingloopy : |
| You sound like you're doing better...confused, yes, but definitely better. I'm glad. Just keep focusing on doing things that make YOU happy. And good luck with the projects at work...those sound cool! :) |
| from spoildangelz : |
| She sounds like a snotty b*tch, your sister-in-law...lol...you're nicer than me to only say those 2 things...I think harsher words would have come out of my mouth. :-) |
| from portia12 : |
| You are totally in the right. I can kind of relate. My boyfriend's sister, despite my efforts, will never be a close friend. Recently she did not acknowledge my birthday with even a card or call. Her not saying hi to you? That's plain ignorant and don't ask me why your family can't see that. The nails thing was plain ignorant as well. I think that you didn't say mean comments, the age one was funny. There is a way to bug someone without being outrightly mean :) it's always the funniest when that person is a pain :) |
| from vla : |
| she sounds AWFUL. yikes. |
| from dieselengine : |
| You cant get along with everybody in your life and unfortunately it seems like you and your sister in law will never see eye to eye. The thing about her is that she probably doesn't even realize she is being that way...that is sad. |
| from beachbride06 : |
| I want you to be happy and whatever that is... go with it! :) |
| from horseshoes : |
| Maybe the "new and improved" singlegirl should hit the town this weekend and meet up with Jeremy another time. If the sex is good with one weeks absense maybe two would be even better. |
| from mozangeles : |
| I think that most of us want to write to you and tell you that we are so happy that you are doing better and we want you to be happy in general, but Liz, come on. How much are you willing to take from Jeremy, from any other asshole who stomps all over you, uses you, and treats you like dirt? All you are teaching Jeremy is that it is alright to treat you like this. Just because you don't put a label on what you two have doesn't mean that it's not there. Look how you are acting! Like a couple. And quite frankly, while I do wish you the best, I think that you need to be prepared to accept whatever happens if you get back with him. I highly doubt it will be positive. I really don't see a happy ending with this guy. Sorry. xoxo - me |
| from summerroll : |
| In Miami, 70 degrees is still considered winter. :D Glad to hear that you're doing better and that the anti-depressants are really working for you. As for Jeremy, I worry for you when you're with him, because after all the things he's done in the past few months, I just know he's going to hurt you again if you give him another chance. And I don't think that your attitude/demeaner/ect prior to all the stuff going down has much bearing. Even if it was weighing down on the relationship, he should have spoken to you about instead of doing all the shady business he did. You deserve to be happy, but I just don't see Jeremy doing that for you in the long run. I think it's okay to continue "seeing" him on a limited basis, as long as you don't fall back into his game. |
| from jumblygiant : |
| just wanted to say hi and I'm reading. Came your way via the lovely meltingblu. And I saw one of my other fave gals vla was in on it too. hi! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| i would definitly advise against smoking up with jermey not because you're on the anti-depressent but as i'm sure you know it can give you terrible anxiety and/or a panic attack. i'm glad to hear your doing better by yourself, and that john freida hair sounds nice. i might need to check that out. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Rage, rage, rage, rage, rage! Stop giving Jeremy your time! ARGH, this makes me angry! I told you to let the door hit his ass on the way out! Anyway, the anti-depressant issue...I know there are certain anti-depressants that really should not be mixed with any alcohol. I have had drinks with mine and I have been fine, but I am not a big drinker. I had a friend on Wellbutrin who had a beer or two and then spent the rest of the night really drunk and vomiting. I would look into it online. Your anti-depressant must have a website of its own. As far as the drugs go, I wouldn't mix it. Totally different chemicals mixing together...probably not a good thing. xoxo - me |
| from dieselengine : |
| Daylight savings time is more fun in the fall...trust me. Gaining an hour is way better than losing one. And I've observed DST my whole life and it really isn't all that bad. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Good riddance to lying rubbish. Seriously, you are so much better off without him. And things will get better. ;) |
| from jess1976 : |
| I too was on Celexa and drank as well... I had no issues. I'm on Zoloft now and they tell me not to drink, I do and I'm ok. As for that slime... just remember you are much better off without him. You are a great person. Enjoy some time being single and mr. wonderful will come I promise! Shoot, if I can meet mr. wonderful, then I'm positive that there is someone out there for everyone. Also, I lived by myself for a little over a year before I met Dan and moved in with him. It was lonely at times, but I really got to know myself and gained some independence, which is something I didn't have in previous relationships. Chin up - glad to hear things are getting a little better. |
| from razor-vixen : |
| I was on Celexa as well (in combo with Wellbutrin, then on it's own). It did help me. I also drank while on it, didn't seem to have a problem. I would say, start out light to see how alcohol will affect you while on it. |
| from chillier : |
| I was on Celexa for a while in college and I drank on it all the time and seemed fine. However, I was told that I acted like a zombie and I couldn't ever have an orgasm so I switched off of it. I probably shouldn't have been drinking on it but I don't remember my doctor telling me not to. |
| from summerroll : |
| I'm glad that you are finally rid of him. The fact that he continued to keep up with the lease lie even after you were nice enough to give him a place to stay was just atrocious. You don't need someone like that in your life. I know it's hard now, but you'll get past it and your life will be back on track so soon you won't even notice. Everything will work out for the best. I'm sending hugs and good thoughts your way. |
| from mozangeles : |
| I HOPE THE DOOR HIT HIS ASS HARD ON THE WAY OUT! See ya, wouldn't want to be ya! Asshole twatface jerk. Anyway, I had a boyfriend on Celexa. He had shakes so badly from drinking, etc, that he had to change to something else. And when he did, he went nutso and dumped me via e-mail. I am on Lexapro and have no side effects. I recommed it for anti-anxiety and depression. And you can drink with it. I know there are medications you should not drink with...like Celexa and Wellbutrin. xoxo - me |
| from portia12 : |
| Ohmigod are you kidding? Who said that about the eggs! We are young, heartache to heartache we stand, no promises no demands. Love is a battlefield! I can relate to what you're going through right now. It's very hard. |
| from incog-notion : |
| he used you, he was an ass and a fucker and a twat, etc etc. OFCOURSE he wants to be with you, he was the one who screwed up and got CAUGHT. you're not walking away from him, you're letting him lie in his bed. you deserve so much better and CAN do better. and you won't until you let him go. i know you can do it. it will be exhilarating. |
| from beckers-j : |
| You won't be stuck on Level One forever! I think you're doing the best you can under the circumstances. And letting Jeremy go will give you some perspective as well as some time to take care of yourself, like you said. You can always think about getting back together down the road - if he deserves it! And women are having babies WAY older than 28 these days!! Geez! |
| from mozangeles : |
| Let him go, Liz. And let the door hit his ass on the way out. Good riddance. That's all. xoxo - me |
| from chillier : |
| Just checking in to see how you're doing. I think the email to your friends was a good idea - might as well be honest and upfront. I'm sure they'll support you. |
| from saveahorse : |
| Your life and mine are so close in a lot of ways. I know how hard it is to go out and do things. Everything has to be planned, and then when it comes time...my anxiety kicks in and it sucks! I hope your friends stick by you, I know some of my friends have and others haven't. Noone understands unless they have been there. I wish you luck and if you ever need to talk you know where to find me. You are not alone. {{hugs}}- Tammy |
| from summerroll : |
| So glad you are doing better. Don't worry about your friends and how they might be feeling or if they're judging you. This is the time for you to get yourself better, and if they can't understand that, then too bad. I have a question. Not to open up a can of worms or anything, but didn't Jeremy put a deposit down on an apartment a while back? What ever happened to that? |
| from polly-esther : |
| Hey, I found you through either dieselengine or vla and I just wanted to say hi and let you know I was reading. I'm starting from the back and going forward. My user is callie and password is cat, by the way. Stop by sometime! |
| from goingloopy : |
| Yes...this is depression. And yes, you must must must go see a therapist. You deserve to have happiness, girlie. Remember, too, that it's possible to be happy with what you have even though you still want more from your life. I hope things improve for you soon...and you SHOULD GO OUT TOMORROW NIGHT. A thought, and I'm sure I plagiarized this from somewhere: If you want a change in attitude, start with a change in behavior. Behave like you are happy and having a good time. It's hard when you're down...but it's also worth it. You can only sustain that level of depression for so long before you get bored as shit with yourself and must escape... |
| from clarity25 : |
| I've had periods where I felt down like that and it was hard to shake. You've been through a lot. But if it lasts for too long, it might be a good idea to find someone to talk to about this. Someone outside of your family, friends and inner circle. Someone that would be able to help and know the right things to say. I hope things get better for you soon, I'm thinking about you. |
| from mozangeles : |
| You need therapy. Trust me. Please get help. xoxo - me |
| from formerlymr : |
| I jsut want to give you the biggest hug and tell you it will get better. It might take a little while but it will. Good idea to see a doctor. Talking to an uninvolved person is always healthy. Hugs, Madi-Rae |
| from dieselengine : |
| You very well may be depressed. With all the changes going on in your life and the challenges you are working on, it can be tough. Go see a doctor and see what they say, but honestly, if you THINK you are depressed you probably are. And you are worth it, so go get some help. |
| from horseshoes : |
| Hey! I'm not old! Neither are you! Forty is still far far away. Even though your frinds may have boyfrends does not mean that they are any closer to having a family or a future. I have had Brian for 2.5 years and we still haven't talked about marriage and I do everything by myself. I think I have seen him for 4 hours in the last month. I feel further away from a family than you do. Same feeling different situation. Hang in there, you know it get better eventually. |
| from clarity25 : |
| P.S. You're definitely NOT old either, You're still very young. I consider myself still young and we're about the same age. things will look up soon. |
| from clarity25 : |
| Break-ups are hard, the way you're feeling is natural. You're going to have all the things you dream of and things will get better. Right now you're just feeling hopeless, It's a slump. We all go through this. This weekend I feared we'd be penniless and struggling forever, that we'd never afford to have a child and end up living on the streets. I was in such a low place. It's just a matter of perspective. No state is permanent. Your future can be everything you want it to be and you have so much ahead of you. So much to look forward to. Try to keep your chin up, I know that's hard. But remember, we're all rooting for you:) By the way the store IS still open for orders, thank you for asking:) I hope your week improves. |
| from portia12 : |
| Things can only get better. |
| from incog-notion : |
| i know that fear - the fear that you're a failure because everyone else your age is (in your case) getting married and know where they're going or (in my case) getting jobs on wallstreet while i'm wasting my college education away on part time jobs with children. but there's no RIGHT way of life. you make it what you make of it. and if you DO want the married life, don't think it's too late... for sure, now isn't the right time but don't shut yourself from the idea. it is still still very very possible all the those things are going to happen, try to see past your current circumstances and embrace the grace of possibility. anything can happen. |
| from geekgurrll : |
| Don't be so hard on yourself. Breakups are very hard and painful and it's natural to feel the way you are right now. Just try to remind yourself that you won't actually feel this way forever (even if it seems that way right now). When my ex and I broke up, I felt so alone and dead inside, I didn't think it was possible to feel that badly and still be alive. It didn't matter that he was wrong for me; I had loved him and it hurt a lot that he was gone from my life. BUT, we made a fairly clean break of it and that helped in the long run, although it felt impossible at the time. You deserve so much more than Jeremy and when he's gone you'll see that. Being alone is much better than being with the wrong person. And you won't be alone forever - it just feels that way right now. Take care. |
| from beckers-j : |
| I'm sorry you're still feeling so down. But if you want the kind of life you described, then you need to get out there. Otherwise, it won't happen. By all means, take some time for yourself and don't rush into anything that makes you uncomfortable. But then, make yourself go to a party. If you feel awkward going by yourself, then arrange for a friend to get ready with you, and you can arrive together. I hope things get better for you soon. |
| from spoildangelz : |
| My thoughts and prayers are with your grandparents and hopefully she'll be okay... |
| from stillsingle : |
| Hey, girl, just wanted to let you know I know how you're feeling. Go back in my diary and see how I was after Jay and I broke up, it's horrible. I have to say, my relationship was much like the one you and Jeremy had. Full of parties, drinking, drugs, sex, etc. It was never going to lead to anything substantial. After I got my DWI, it really woke me up. I realized that was not the life I wanted and men like that were not the kind of men I wanted to marry or be the father of my children. So, I changed my life and met a great guy. Sure, he's not very social, he's an accountant, doesn't drink much, doesn't do drugs, in most people's minds probably "boring", but ya know what? He makes me happier than I've ever been in my life and I know he can give me the kind of life I want to have. You have got to believe that you are better than that and you deserve to have a guy who knows he's lucky to have you and is worthy of being with you. Trust me, they are out there. Just give yourself time to heal, start new and be picky! They say most women spend more time picking out shoes, than they do husbands! You deserve only the best! Take care. |
| from summerroll : |
| I'm sending good thoughts about your grandma. Don't feel sorry about the things you write/say in your diary. That's why most of us have a diary; to vent about the things we can't really vent about in real life becasue then everyone would think we were childish, selfish, crazy whatever. Everyone needs some kind of an outlet, whether it's a real person, or in our case strangers from around the world. So don't ever start hiding your true feelings. |
| from beckers-j : |
| I hope things turn out okay with your Grandma. |
| from portia12 : |
| I was super impressed when I learned you were a social worker. You are well educated and helping people. Smart and pretty! Keep your head up! |
| from beckers-j : |
| DO NOT feel sorry for yourself! Being a social worker is completely admirable, and you should be proud that you help people. Be proud that you're beautiful! Take care of yourself - get to know yourself. And being single isn't so bad. Take up a new and exciting hobby - take Karate (like me!), learn to play an instrument, take up photography. Doing something for yourself will make you feel happy. Everyone in your family will then SEE that you're happy, and they will ENVY you. ;) It's all about image, girl. And you have nothing to be ashamed of. |
| from krugerpak007 : |
| Wowyou are going through so much and your friends seem overy over-protective. I really think its because they care, but spying is really not acceptable behavior. Your email was great. You were honest and upfront. The ball is in there court now. Take care and feel good. xoxo |
| from makinganewme : |
| Your email sounded great. I've been on your friends side of the deal twice. It's hard because they know you deserve better and hate to see you settle for less. They might be upset, but you apologized and they won't be mad forever. Good luck!! |
| from pissymystic : |
| I guess this is why I don't have many friends. It annoys the HELL out of me when people worry and poke and pry. I'm very careful to surround myself with people who know when things aren't their business. (I don't mean to sound like a total bitch, but reading your entries, I've kind of been amazed that they were acting the way they have.) Anyway, I hope you feel better about all this soon. *hug* |
| from spoildangelz : |
| You know what...tell them exactly what you just wrote in this diary and I can guarantee you that they'd understand. We've all done things that we've kept secret because we know it's wrong. We know it's wrong yet we do it anyway. Let them know that it's not because you don't trust them...or that you wanted to lie about it. You just already knew what they were going to say and you agree with it...it's just that it's a lot harder to just cut him off completely...and that you will eventually get to that point. Let them know that this is just temporary and that you and Jeremy are not together...and another reason why you didn't tell anyone was because you don't want him back into your social circle. Don't just let this go and pretend that nothing happened. Friends are valuable and pretty handy to have to help you go through rough times. And your real friends will stick with you no matter what you do. They will tell you what they think about a situation...and let you make your own decision. Should you make a mistake, they will still be there in the end. Just be up front with them. If they let something like this get in the way of your friendship, well then I guess they weren't real friends to begin with and you're better off. |
| from beckers-j : |
| I would send an e-mail somewhere along the lines of: "I appreciate your concern during all of this, but I'm going through a really difficult and confusing time right now. I'm not sure how to deal with all of this, and I know I may make some mistakes in the process, but I hope that all of you respect me enough to not make any judgments and to let me know how you feel rather than discussing it behind my back. Although I am very close to all of you, there are some things about which I am very private, and I would like that privacy to be respected as well. I may not want to share everything I'm feeling right now. Most of all, I just need your support. Regardless of any mistakes I might make or however you might disagree with my actions, I value our friendships very much, and I need and appreciate all the support I can get right now." Or something like that. ;) You didn't do anything wrong. It's just very confusing and weird for you right now, and your friends just need to support you instead of controlling what you do or how you react. It's not their place to do that. |
| from geekgurrll : |
| You wrote that you knew that your friends would be upset and you didn't want to defend yourselfto them...when you already knew that it was 'wrong'. If you tell them that, they should understand. We've all been there - no one handles a break-up perfectly and part of their concern is most likely because they know they would probably do the same thing. You need your friends at times like this so don't shut them all out. It does suck when you're already feeling like shit to have more shit to deal with. Good luck. |
| from chillier : |
| That's a tough situation. I think you have to decide how much you want to defend yourself to your friends. If you feel you have to respond somehow I would be as honest as you can - not about what you've been up to, but just that you're having a very hard time right now and that severing a 2.5 year relationship is not as cut and dry as they would like it to be. That you love them and appreciate that they care about you but that sometimes caring about someone means not judging their actions and maybe offering a shoulder or an ear, rather than gossiping about you behind your back. Otherwise, if you really feel it's none of their business, then don't do anything at all. Like you said, if they bring it up then you can politely explain that it's not really any of their business. Definitely don't apologize to anyone - you haven't done anything to anyone. |
| from justagal : |
| I would do whatever is going to make you happy. Your friends will get over it. They are just trying to look out for you, whether you believe them or not. What is next Monday that will be the deciding factor for him to leave? It origianlly was going to be today, but now it's extended. Is it going to be extended again? If so, it sounds like you two are back together from an outsiders point of view. Maybe that's what your friends are seeing too. At the end of the day, you are responsible for making yourself happy. If your friends are true, they will let you do what you need to, and will support you through anything. If they don't, which you know some of them will, then they weren't your friends to begin with. Don't send out an email detailing what you've done or been doing. Just do it and don't worry about defending yourself. One day at a time. That's all you can do. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I know what you mean about irrational jealousy, Lately that has been overtaking me too. I get jealous of everyone that has more money. My friends call me up to talk about vacations they're going on, furniture they're buying, houses and such. Here I am, broke and eating Ramen noodles.. my stomach growling and they're going on and on about what they're going to do with all the money they have. I feel like they're rubbing it in. It's one thing to read about an positive experience someone is having in their journal but another thing when a friend is sitting next to you go on and on. Than I feel guilty because I should be more happy for them. I hate feeling that way. I know what you mean, I can also understand your desire to not be social for a while. I hope everything works out in regards to you and Jeremy. |
| from meltingblu : |
| hey Lizzy! thsnks for the note, it's very nice meeting you, i will be reading you now too, as we seem to have similar lives...keep in touch girly |
| from beckers-j : |
| You have some single friends, right? Get together with some single friends and just bitch. You shouldn't have to pretend that everything is fine when it isn't. You need to work through the anger you're feeling, and it helps when you have someone to listen and/or agree with you. ;) And to answer your question, I have a BA in Social Philosophy. Thanks for your feedback regarding my job situation. It's not that I mind writing grant proposals because I really don't - I like to write in general. It's just that I want to do MORE. I don't want to sit on my ass all day in front of a computer. I want to be more involved in what's going on. And this place is so freakin' huge and bureaucratic, it's ridiculous. It's more like a corporate environment than a nonprofit one. See, venting helps a little bit. ;) |
| from incog-notion : |
| your book doesn't suck. *hug* just keep swimming. |
| from spoildangelz : |
| Your book doesn't suck. :-) If it makes you feel any better, I love reading you...about your life. The fact that things are down right now doesn't change that. Stay strong - when things are down, it can only go up from there. |
| from third-person : |
| Just sending lots of love and positive thoughts your way. |
| from chillier : |
| I just finished reading all of your archives and WOW! I am a relatively new reader - I started reading toward the end of 2005 - and once the whole Jeremy crisis went down I wanted to catch up and really learn more abour your diary (I say "your diary" instead of "you" because I realize that diaries are not necessarily an accurate presentation of someone's real life). Anyway, it was a great reading experience and I really enjoyed it. It also made it a lot more clear why you'd have such a hard time cutting Jeremy completely out of your life - he's been your best friend, support system, and pseudo-husband for almost two years. I live in a similar situation with my boyfriend of two years and if he did something to me and I wanted to try to cut him out of my life, I'm not sure that I could. In fact, I probably couldn't. So, anyway, I loved your diary! And we're both football fans (I know, me Patriots, you Colts, but we can agreet to disagree), we're both huge Golden Girls fans, and we're both dog lovers. So I hope all is going well with you, that you're taking care of yourself, and I'm hoping for more updates. Bye for now. |
| from beckers-j : |
| I don't blame you or think you're stupid. It's a difficult situation to be in when you still love him. Just make sure you take things slow. Make sure you get the trust back before you make any serious decisions about getting back with him. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Please, please make sure that, if you have to see him, you continue to take care of yourself. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| i don't blame you for seeing jermey even though it's in secret. i know when jason broke up with me christmas eve 2 years ago, everyone else was 100% against him but it's hard to just stop loving someone like that. i just hope you don't get hurt again, so be careful :) |
| from incog-notion : |
| you know that i know that it sucks. i'm not downplaying anything. I HATE my ex with a passion and just ran into him today.. i KNOW. i'm not downplaying. but you said you've never been single before and i havent either.. and i just want to tell you that it can really be exhilarating.. this new found opportunity to get to know yourself, focus on whatyou want and not what's good for you and jermery as a unit. it will make you feel so accomplished... so proud. i promise... |
| from ticktrix : |
| Stay strong. Being single any day is far better than being suspicious of someone who can so easily lie to your face while you cook it food and pay its rent. |
| from spoildangelz : |
| Yeah...it does suck... :-( |
| from summerroll : |
| Oh yeah, and karma is a bitch. |
| from summerroll : |
| You'll feel bad for a while, but it'll all start getting better soon. And it's not so bad/hard being single. This will just give you time to work on you and figure out what it is exactly that you want/need in life. It will all work out in the end. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Amen to what mozangeles said. You CAN get through this. It sucks donkey ass, but it will also make you a stronger person...or maybe just make you realize that you are strong, no matter what you think. Enjoy the freedom that this gives you. And do NOT allow him to weasel his ass back in. You deserve so much more than that horseshit. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Liz, I know this is hard...you lost your best friend and your boyfriend all in one blow, but you have to remember how sneaky, conniving, and contrived this whole scheme of his was/is to get a new apartment, not to mention the whole text messaging, etc. That is not the kind of friend/boyfriend you need in your life. Every single time you think about taking him back, remember that! And what kind of message would you be sending to him if you took him back after treating you like that? Just remember that stuff. You are doing great. We are all behind you. xoxo - me |
| from spoildangelz : |
| I'm so sorry you're going through all this bs right now. And I know it doesn't feel like it at the moment, but it will get better. It's better that it happened now rather than later...when you've already gotten a house together, or even gotten married...or had kids! Just think of it this way...you can start fresh...be on your own and live the way you want to without having to worry about someone else. And...when the time comes, you'll meet someone better..someone who will value you and be everything you want in a man. Someone who will take care of you and will want to spend every waking hour with you....someone who is financially stable and has a good head on his shoulders. I know it hurts right now...we've all been there...and you know as much as I do that every day will be a little better than the one before. |
| from jess1976 : |
| Just wanted to drop in and say hi. Hope your hanging in there. Wanted to let you know I'm thinking about you! |
| from portia12 : |
| Thinking of you. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hang in there. And it's fine to be lazy and self-involved for as long as you need - that's the one benefit of being in a situation like this. No one can blame you for it. I hope you feel better about all of this soon. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I just caught up with all your entries. (I had fallen behind during my visit home and in my travels back to Germany.) I am so sorry for everything that you've been going through I'm so sorry about what has happened between you and Jeremy. I wish I had the right words, but I don't right now. Just know that I'm reading and I'm here if ever you want to reach out and talk. I'm thinking about you, Hang strong, Liz. You will get through this. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Stay strong, Liz! I know this is incredibly difficult for you, but you are being so strong! Everyone is so proud of you. Whether you move back home or get a new place of your own, or whatever, we all support you! xoxo - me |
| from beachbride06 : |
| OMG L- I wish you lived here so i can hug you... so we can have slumber parties and drink and smoke and make everything better for you!!!!!!!!! i am so sorry,. you know my email if you need to vent or if you need anything....you are a strong girl.... i admire you for that... its jeremys loss..... he fucked up big time..... and i know yuo love him, but he has put you through some shit... if it is meant to be.. (yes, i know you probably have herardf this a million times).. I love ya BUD! |
| from third-person : |
| I'm sorry to hear about the pain you're going through. If you ever want to talk, I'm here. My boyfriend and I have (kinda) broken up, so I can definitely empathize. You're in my thoughts and prayers. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| Wow! I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry that things had to end up like this I know you loved Jeremey. Stick close to your family and friends, it sounds like you have alot of people who love you. Take care. |
| from ticktrix : |
| I'm so proud of you! You will be proud of you too, but it will take time. Take care of yourself. |
| from horseshoes : |
| Wow, I haven't read any diaries for a while and that just blows me away. I think you did the right thing. LIEING CANNOT BE TOLERATED! I'm glad you have some good friends and family to lean on. It hurts like hell for a while but you've been through a breakup before (like so many of us) so you have to know that it does get better. Hang tough. |
| from summerroll : |
| My heart broke for you when I read just read that. But I am proud of you for doing what you needed to do for yourself and for keeping reasonably calm through out the entire thing. I say, that if you really want to buy a house in the near future that you should move back home. There is no shame in that at all. It really is the smartest move to quickly save money for a downpayment instead of losing money to rent AND at the same time trying to save. Things happen for a reason, and I think that this will all work out for you. I'll keep sending good thoughts. |
| from formerlymr : |
| I'm sorry Chica. But you are AMAZING! And BRAVE! And a bunch of other awesome things. I can't believe what an asshole he is. GGGrrr... You deserve so much better. Head up, girl. It will get better real soon. |
| from beckers-j : |
| WOW! That's fuckin' crazy, man. I can't believe what a total douche-bag Jeremy is. Holy shit. For what it's worth, I think you handled the situation amazingly. I give you a lot of credit for being so strong and decisive, and I think you did an incredible job of sending him packing so quickly! Awesome. I hope you're doing okay now. I'm sorry all of this has happened. |
| from chillier : |
| I'm so so sorry to hear that your relationship with Jeremy is over. But you know what? You ended it and kept your dignity and you came across strong and brave. I wish you tons and tons of luck and hope for your future. |
| from makinganewme : |
| WTF, Liz, I am so sorry. I cannot find words right now because I am in shock. He was sure being sneaky, but I really didn't think this was going to be the outcome. I know things are going to be terribly rough for you, and I will be here for you every step of the way. There is one thing I know for sure....you are a pillar of strength. I know you don't feel like one but look what you've accomplished in the last month. It took a lot of guts and determination. I think if you attack this breakup with that much determinaton you will be fine. You are beautiful inside and out and you deserve so much more. |
| from geekgurrll : |
| you handled that so well. And your friends deserve gold stars. I'm sorry. Breakups are never easy, even if in the long run, you see it's for the best. You showed a lot of strength in confronting him - it might have been tempting to let him stay the month and try to "win" him back or something. You should be so proud of yourself for ending it then...and ending it on your terms. Also, the best part of a breakup is the skinniness that ultimately follows. Take care! |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am very proud of you. You were confident, diplomatic, and to the point. You handled it with poise and grace. I hope you are half as proud of yourself as I am! I know this is going to be incredibly hard for you. I will be here for you if you need anything. xoxo - me |
| from lonelylatina : |
| oh my gosh i can't believe it. i was hoping he was acting suspicious because he was planning something for valentines. i guess not. i'm sorry. a break up is such a hard thing to go through. thank goodness you have a great support system in your family and friends. i am so proud of how you handled it and how you won't let yourself be used like that. keep your head up liz. |
| from justagal : |
| It sounds like you have wonderful friends and a wonderful family. You've also got a wonderful support group with your Diaryland friends, so you see, you will never truly be alone. I am so sorry things turned out this way. |
| from justagal : |
| What happened? I am dying to know if you confronted him! |
| from beckers-j : |
| You are NOT a fucking joke. Just talk to him. Get all of your suspicions out there, and ask him to prove that he hasn't been cheating. For example, ask him to show you the text messages he has sent/received in the middle of the night. You could try to keep the snooping out of it, but the fact is that you should be as honest as possible with him, too. And like I said, he has given you reason to be suspicious. Your jealousy is one thing, but his lying about stupid things like talking to Angie is just going to make things worse. He needs to know that. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Liz, I caught Paulo making an excel spreadsheet of apartments that he was looking at on Craig's List and Rent.com when we were going through a really bad patch and thought we might break up. But, what pissed me off is that he was sneaky about it. When I confronted him, he was pissed, but I was pissed too, and we had to talk about it. He told me that he was making sure he had a place to live in case things did not work out with us. Like you, I pay for most everything and everything is in my name. So, I can understand that he was trying to have his ass covered if I ever threw him out, but trust your instinct with this one and talk to him. You are going to have to admit to snooping. xoxo - me |
| from formerlymr : |
| Please trust your gut. And don't stay because you are afraid to start over. I did just that and it never got better. I wasted four years. And just last year started over. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Hugs. |
| from mozangeles : |
| I agree. You really need to just be honest and forthcoming and get the answers you need. The only way you could look like a psycho is if you come out screaming, flailing your arms, etc. Find a tactful way to bring it up. Tell him that you have been suspicious and have been checking the bank accounts and phone records. You deserve to know what is going on. We are all here for you. xoxo - me |
| from beckers-j : |
| You NEED to just come out and ask him. Confront him with your suspicions. The fact is, he's given you reason to be suspicious, so explain that to him first. Then tell him how you followed up on it. He can't accuse you of being pyscho when it's his actions that have led you to believe he's being dishonest. A girl's gotta trust her gut. Let him know what you've found. Let him know that you don't feel you can trust him. |
| from jess1976 : |
| I would have to find out the truth if I were you. I would come right out and ask him and if he denies, give him your proof. I don't think it's psycho of you to check phone records. He's been acting weird and you've asked him what was going on and he denied everything. So, I would have done the same thing if I was in your shoes(and I have too). A woman's intuition is right many times. I know that's not what you want to hear, but in the end, if he is cheating, you deserve way better than that! You are a wonderful person and deserve the very best! Please keep us updated! |
| from summerroll : |
| I say to just ask him straight up. At this point, you really have nothing to prove. If he isn't cheating, he won't have any problem calming your fears by showing you his phone. If he is or if he is maybe doing something else, this would be the time to talk about it and work it out. Hope this helps and I'll be sending good thoughts your way. |
| from geekgurrll : |
| Hi there - I think that you should trust your instincts - you already have and found out he lied about the phone call to his parents. Also? You might feel like you're a jealous person, but his behaviour has created that more than you'd be on your own. If that makes sense. Can you catch him texting? Or explain that you would like to see his phone and if he's got nothing to hide, then he shouldn't have a problem with it? I used to read my ex's emails and it was always no good. When I found something out, it was impossible to say why without the whole situation turning around on me and suddenly I would be the one on the defensive. I just don't do it anymore, ever. Unless you're prepared to do something with the information. Either way, your trust in Jeremy is gone for the moment. I'm sorry. I hate situations like this and I hope you'll be okay. |
| from missdahling : |
| Hi. I found your diary some time ago, just have never said hello until now. I read your latest entry and had to comment because I am just like you in regards that I have trust issues with my boyfriend as well. I don't let him know it, but I am insanely jealous when he's around other girls. At one point, it got so bad that I didn't even want to go out in public places with him just because I was afraid I would catch him checking out other girls who didn't look like me. Well, sorry for not saying hi sooner, but I just wanted to let you know that you're not the only person who feels the way you do. Hope you have a great week. |
| from portia12 : |
| I really feel that guys know how fake strippers are and that they would rather be with a real woman any day. I went to the female strippers and probably 80% have implants, and their bodies are so unrealistic it's not funny. Real women don't have these features. He will not be comparing you because he loves YOU. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm really glad things are better between the two of you. I had read that previous entry a few days ago and didn't have the opportunity to leave a comment. I was worried and I'm relieved everything fell into place. Also I understand your feelings about the stripper and that's strong of you to accept it, let go and trust him. Loopy is right, men are stupid. They like to look at boobies and act out. But it's just because they are guys. He'll go there and laugh with his friends and it'll be over. Try not to think about it too much, and remember that he loves YOU, not the silly girls dancing around topless for money. He has respect for you and not for them. That's the difference. I'm sure it will be fine in the end. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Men are retarded, and if you wave boobs in their face, their brains quit working. Even the possibility of naked boobs will do this. It doesn't mean they don't love you, or want to have sex with you. It just means that they are boys. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Wanting to see a stripper with his friends isn't unique to Jeremy - 99% of guys wouldn't say no to seeing a stripper. It doesn't mean anything, though. And just so you know, most strippers that hire themselves out for parties and such are NOT good looking - especially the ones our boyfriends could afford. ;) Don't worry so much. I also wouldn't worry about the ex. The fact that he said he couldn't do the long distance thing when you asked him if he'd ever get back together with her doesn't mean anything either. Guys often don't think about what they're saying. They're not as careful with language as women are, and he probably said that because he takes it for granted that of course he loves you and wouldn't leave you. Guys are just dumb like that. |
| from spoildangelz : |
| I'm so sorry that things aren't going too well with Jeremy...I know it sounds cliche, but if you two are really meant to be together, then you will. You're probably just going through a rough patch and will get over it eventually. And then this will be just a distant memory...something you'll only remember by reading back on your diary...Good luck...and hopefully things turn out alright for you two...stay strong (it sounds like you already are!)...don't change for anybody...do what makes you happy...if he really loves you, you won't be the only one trying to put effort into fixing things... |
| from incog-notion : |
| I agree with all the other lovelies and i am rooting for you two. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Aw Liz, don't fret too much. Every long-term and serious couple goes through these periods. Paulo and I go through them almost every week and we have been together 3 years. Jeremy does not want to give up, so don't you give up, either! And I mean mentally as well as physically. I heart you, and I am sending you good wishes. xoxo - me |
| from jess1976 : |
| I truely believe every couple that has been together for a long time gets stuck in a rut of the everday normal routine. Dan and I are like that all the time. We argue and many times we go to bed early without having much quality time together but that's part of being an adult and having to work for a living. Sometimes I dwell on it more than others, but in the end we still love each other, just like you and Jeremy. I have faith that you guys will be ok. Just go home and have a romantic evening together. Make sure to talk and get everything out in the open. Definitely don't let your insecurities get the best of you though, if he knows he can walk all over you, he will, whether or not it's intentional. Stay strong. I will be praying for you guys! |
| from dieselengine : |
| Agh, this entry breaks my heart. If he is half as willing to make things work as you are, I am sure things will be fine. Good times and bad, right? Hang in there and things will get better. It seems like you two are communicating a lot and that is most important in times like these. |
| from beachbride06 : |
| Things will work out. Im praying for you! this should pass and if not, work it out-talk it out. I love you guys together and i know you love him very much. If you want email me! :) Muah! x0x0x0x0 SMILE... things can only get better..... great job on teh diet girl! I am so proud of yoU!!!!!! |
| from geekgurrll : |
| maybe when the weather gets nicer, you and jeremy could go bike riding or roller blading or something like that together - so you can still get your workout and spend some time together. I used to go running with an ex of mine and afterwards we'd make dinner together and during our walk after the run, we'd talk and catch up. My current boyfriend and I play golf together (which I'm not totally convinced is actually exercise, but at least we're outside enjoying the fresh air) - but we also struggled through the whole just going home after work, putting on the tv and eating dinner in front of it and not even really interacting so we made an effort to avoid that. Good luck. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Everything you wrote about Jeremy sounds like my boyfriend, Paulo. It is scary to think that someone so intelligent could lack such common sense. And to have lived longer than I have (he is older than I am by 6 years) is scary to think about. And I feel the same way, "I cannot marry this man," at times, because fuck, sometimes I think he lives only for himself, which will lead to his ruin. He does not think that the decisions he makes now affect us both. Hang in there. xoxo - me |
| from beachbride06 : |
| Hey girl. I went to another sex toy party on sunday.. it was fantastic.. sleepover party or slumber party or something was the name of the company...it was good times, and well, insane! :) I love it! Enjoy!!!! Havea great day girlie! |
| from jess1976 : |
| I'm in eastern standard zone (Michigan) and in the summer the sun rises between 5-6am and sets around 9-10pm. In the winter the sun rises between 6-7 am and sets around 5-6pm. I love summer here because for at least a few days in the summer it will be 10pm and it will still be light out. |
| from saveahorse : |
| I am in central time zone (minnesota) our hours here are the same. In the summer sun comes up 5:30-6am and sets 8-9pm. In the winter sun rises at like 7-8 and goes down like 5-6. I will agree that when we do daylight savings, I always think damn it's really .... and it annoys me to all end. |
| from saveahorse : |
| I am no expert... but I have anxiety and I have the same feelings as you. Tighness of chest- I am so used to this... working out does the same thing to me, so does smoke. Anxiety really puts a strain on your body and depression goes along with it. I know what it is like to have your life change so dramatically! I hope everything works out for you. |
| from artofliving : |
| honey!! i cannot tell you how good it is to be back and catch up on you!! missed you, sweet!! |
| from incog-notion : |
| hunny. IT"S A CRUISE. itll be fantabulous. fuck his ex. and dear.. can i have your other journal url? |
| from ticktrix : |
| You'll love the cruise. Oh, and, yes, yes, yes book a stateroom now since it's early. Everyone booking after you will also book a stateroom and you'll get bumped up to an even better room. Enjoy!! |
| from beachbride06 : |
| hey girl..pete and i went on a cruise last year. it was AMAZING and petes first.... we went on celebrity, it was great, but next time we would definitely do royal carribean (has more activites and more things to do at night)... we went to Puerto Rico, St. Thomas (amazing) St. Maartain (amazing) and Bahamas (fantasy island is so gorgeous) if you want to see the pics (over 100) i can send them to you, just email me! :) cruises are amazing, but some people dont like them because you always have an agenda, once at the islands, but i like it... i really really do.! Good luck girlie! |
| from mozangeles : |
| I have never been on a cruise, but I have sold a lot of them when I was a travel agent! I have always wanted to try a cruise, but I got wary of the thought of being stuck on a ship for sometimes a couple days on end (depending on where you go). I also got worried after reading this People Mag article about people being lost on cruise ships! But, it sounds like you won't be going too far. :) I hope you have a great time! xoxo - me |
| from summerroll : |
| Cruises are awesome! I've been on 3: 2 eastern caribbean, 1 western caribbean. And it is definitely lovely weather in Novemember, althought it is *still* hurricane season at that point. The rooms won't matter much because you'll only be sleeping in there (or, ahem, other stuff). What I love about cruises is that everything is included: the room, the food (available 24/7 - so watch out), sightseeing. It'll be awesome. Buy your ticket early because you'll get a larger discount. |
| from classygirl83 : |
| awwwe, your hair sounds super cute!! Can I have access to your "other" diary? If not I totally understand, but if I can my e-mai l is [email protected] |
| from beckers-j : |
| It sounds like you and I have similar hair. I was unhappy with mine for the longest time and doing all the same things you've been doing - minimal trimming, lots of conditioning, etc. Then I got it cut just above my shoulders, added more layers and side-swept bangs, and - best of all - got this high-gloss conditioning treatment from my hairdresser. It's amazing. It only cost $15, and my hair is sleek and shiny and so much healthier now. |
| from goingloopy : |
| I feel you on the hair crises, girlie...I asked for layers and ended up with about a foot cut off my hair, and I was most pissed off. Now it's all one length and to the middle of my back, and it's staying there. I think you should get some layers, but shoot for growing it longer, because it would probably be easier to manage (and plus, then you always have the shoving it in a ponytail option, which is not to be discounted....) Good luck, and yes, pictures!! (PS - I wanna see the scarves. I have a total scarf addiction.) |
| from rdhdprincess : |
| I'm all about the weight loss support dear. I will e-mail you for the new diary info. You can do it! Wait, did you say Lee Press On nails? Bwah! |
| from beachbride06 : |
| Liz- my most fave dl girl.. i wanna see more pics of the beautiful girl we love to read and hear about.. now just your beautiful eyes... girl, come to jersey... check it out... oh and join myspace, i swear it is ridiculous addicting. love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| from mozangeles : |
| This is the comment that I left for you in my comments section: Thank you so much! I loved this entry. I feel like I have gotten to know you a lot over the past couple months, but this entry reminds me that there is always more to learn about you. Now we have something more in common besides those horrific panic attacks. Wanting to get engaged...and this year! You have no idea how badly I want to be engaged, even if it means I won't get married for YEARS. I just want that damn ring and commitment for eff's sake. Anyway, thank you so much for your lovely entry. You and Jenn both saved me today from the desperation and humiliation of begging people to post a guest entry. I heart you! :) xoxo - me |
| from clarity25 : |
| Congrats on stopping smoking. That was my new years resolution last year and I was unsuccessful. It's rather disheartening. I'm really proud of you, it gives me inspiration to do the same. Good luck on your next resolution, and I'm glad you had a good Christmas! |
| from summerroll : |
| I'm glad you had a great Christmas. You deserved it. And great job on the non-smoking! |
| from mozangeles : |
| Congratulations on your 16 days! Keep it up! :) xoxo - me |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am so sorry to hear that. xoxo - me |
| from pissymystic : |
| Hey...I haven't been around much lately, so I'm VERY late with commenting. (Sorry!) I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry for all the crap you're going through, and that you are in my thoughts. *hug* |
| from beckers-j : |
| I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. :( I hope things start to get better for you soon. Happy Holidays! |
| from spoildangelz : |
| I'm really sorry about what you're having to go through...I wish I can tell you that everything will be better and not to worry, but that's really not going to do much good. In the end, your grandfather's going to go to hospice, anyway...and your dog's still going to have diabetes. It sucks, but life goes on. You just have to make the most of it! I know it's easier said than done, but I'm going to say it, anyway: Count your blessings! Be grateful that you have friends and family to spend the holidays with. Be grateful that you still have your girls to do "girl's night" with. Be grateful that you have Jeremy to come home to and vent to at the end of a very frustrating day. There will always be bad to go with the good...but you're going to make it through. You always do! :-) |
| from mozangeles : |
| Not to be cliche, but goddamn, when it rains, it pours. December is a horrible month and I am lobbying to have it erased from the calendar completely. I heart you. Chin up. xoxo - me |
| from saveahorse : |
| That sucks about your co-worker, however that is definately something that would happen where I work! I am so sad about your dog and grandpa! I will say a prayer for them tonight (if you don't mind). About the heart thing, I think I wore mine for like 2 days. Yes you can wear a bra, but with all of those wires, it is not comfortable. I had to write what I was doing and eating in this notebook thing, and then if I felt a panic attack, I had to push this button. Hopefully yours goes better then mine did, I was somehow alergic to the tape they used for the wires and could not stop iching for a week. It was not fun! Good luck :) |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am so glad to hear that you are panic-attack free for now! And I totally feel you on the non-smoking thing. I quit almost a year ago (next month is a year!), and when I am around smoke now, I realize how digusting it is. I never, ever though those words would come out of my mouth. I used to be a proud smoker. But, now that I am almost never around it anymore, I realize how gross it really does smell. Keep up the good work! One thing at a time is a good method. xoxo - me |
| from clarity25 : |
| IThanks for joining my neighborhood ;), I liked your dream house. I'm glad you're feeling a little bit better, I'm sorry for all the stress you've been through lately and the panic attacks you've struggled with. I hope you have a good Christmas and things continue looking up. Congrats on not smoking. Serious Kudos on that because I'm trying to stop too and having a hard time. |
| from saveahorse : |
| I also went through all the test you are doing and all of them came back negative. Everything you are talking about I have went through. For 2 years I did not want to leave my house, for fear of having another attack. When I was on medicine all I would do is sleep and I couldn't eat. I would come home from work and sleep until the next morning. That is why I stopped using them. I wanted a "normal life". I am not back to the way I was before this has started, however I am so much better that the begining. I hope everything works out for you! Just remember that there are people out here who care and know what you are going through! You are not alone...Take care |
| from third-person : |
| I suffered from an anxiety disorder for several years and I'm training to be a doctor of psychology, so anything that you want to know ask me. You can e-mail me or even call if you need to. I just want to help. I've been there, and I know how frightening it can be. |
| from beckers-j : |
| I'm so sorry. This whole situation must be horrible for you. I have no idea what it could be, but I really hope the doctors figure it out soon so you can take care of it and get on with your life. I'm thinkin' of ya! |
| from mozangeles : |
| I was almost 100% sure that you were having panic/anxiety attacks when I first read you. Now that you have lost 10 lbs, I am even more worried that it could be something with your thyroid. God, I do not mean to scare you, but I and hoping and wishing that everything turns out to be alright. I know how you feel and what you are going through. My mom was agoraphobic for a short while after giving birth to me because her panic attacks became so severe and she was afraid of having them in public. People in general and even in the medical world are so misinformed about anxiety attacks. They think that you can just control when they happen. I heart you, and I hope that you get through this. I will be thinking of you, and I am always here if you need to talk. xoxo - me |
| from beckers-j : |
| Holy bruises! That sucks! And Clyde is soooo cute! I love the picture of him on the couch near the Christmas tree. Ha! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm sorry to hear about your panic attacks, they sound worse than the experience I had this morning. But I can relate to the emotions and feelings you expressed. I hope that the doctors can get to the root of it and everything gets a little bit better for you. You're in my thoughts right now. Thank you so much for your last note. Oh and I loved your Flickr photos, Your doggie is so cute...(But a little scary for my taste... I'm abnormally afraid of dogs - He has kind eyes though.) |
| from summerroll : |
| All I can think about after reading your entry is that one of your coworkers will find that jug in the fridge and mistake it for something else. Ha! Anyway. So glad that you're feeling better. All that sounded so scary. And Clyde is soooo cute, but DAMN he's gonna be a monster. No one will try to attack you with him around. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| i know how scary panic attacks can be. and acctually that is why i started my diary here on diarlyand was after severe panic attacks like what you have been having and 3 similar trips to the ER. a couple things i have learned about myself is the anti-anxiety meds like Paxil and Zoloft are not what i needed. they make me feel worse. what i need is xanax just to have incase i do have attack then i know it is there. also you mentioned that you were smoking the night before and that can also bring on panic attacks. i hope you are feeling a little better because i wouldn't wish this on anyone. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Wow, those panic attacks sound rough. It sounds like you're making every effort to address them, though. That's good. I hope it doesn't happen again. Also, if you undergo blood or urine testing at a hospital or doctor's office, the police have no claim on those results, and medical personnel are restricted by law from sharing them. That kind of medical information is protected by federal law and couldn't be released to any kind of authorities without you signing an authorization to do so. Otherwise, it would be a violation of your civil rights. |
| from makinganewme : |
| Gosh- I am so sorry! I've only ever had one but it wasn't anything nearly as severe as that and I didn't really fully undertand what it was until after it was all over. I'm glad you're feeling better. As for the bill, who knows. I'd say Jeremy's guess is probably right on. We took Michael to the ER for an ulcer and after all the tests, EKG, xrays, ect...we got a bill back for almost $5000. I think it mostly depends on location, what types of meds they give you...stuff like that. I wouldn't worry about it...insurances are usually really good about paying ER visits, and if not theres always payment plans. Whats the most important is that you're okay. |
| from mozangeles : |
| God, I am really sorry to hear about your panic attacks. But if it is any consolation, I am here for you, as I suffer from them as well. It sounds like they gave you Ativan. I have a prescription for it as well. They are "emergency" panic attack pills, only to be taken when you have a panic attack. The other prescription that I take, Lexapro, is more to prohibit them from coming...to keep my anxiety levels down to where I do not have them. But since it is a chemical thing, other medications such as Klonipin work for panic attacks - that is what my mom takes. I cannot tell you how many times my mom and I have been to the ER thinking we were going to die from having panic attacks. Luckily, I have not had one so bad since I have been on and off insurance that it warranted an ER visit (I could never afford that, most likely). It is horrible. I think my mom uses strategies like reading license plates or reciting Presidents' names, to distract herself when she is having one. Also, having Jeremy or someone else there to help you regulate your breathing and tell you everything is ok might help. I am not an expert by any means, but I hope this advice helps you. And I am always here to talk about it! xoxo - me |
| from dieselengine : |
| Sorry about your attacks, I hope you get them under control...but about your hospital bill, I don't think it will be $2,000. You didn't even stay overnight. With your insurance and everything it will probably cost you around $800. I had my gallbladder taken out and stayed in the hospital for three days and I had to pay $2,500 and my insurance is less than stellar...so it might not be as bad as you think it would be. And don't worry about it; that would be just another reason for another attack. |
| from saveahorse : |
| Yes, anti depressants suppress your appetite. I feel for you , I remember when I had my first couple attacks. I went to the hospital 2x and went in for about a million tests. At least you know you are having an anxiety attack and you can be prepared. I had no clue what was going on with me, I thought for sure I had a heart problem! I had to figure out myself what was going on and tell the doctor! I am glad you are feeling better today! I wish you luck! |
| from saveahorse : |
| Yes, anti depressants suppress your appetite. I feel for you , I remember when I had my first couple attacks. I went to the hospital 2x and went in for about a million tests. At least you know you are having an anxiety attack and you can be prepared. I had no clue what was going on with me, I thought for sure I had a heart problem! I had to figure out myself what was going on and tell the doctor! I am glad you are feeling better today! I wish you luck! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I hear what you're saying about the singletons versus the couples. I had a similar problem, I might write about it in a future entry. I feel the separation even more now that I'm married. It's kind of sad in a way, My days of going out to clubs with my SINGLE friends and flirting (harmlessly, mind you) with guys seems to have come to a solid end. Now it's groups of couples going out. My single friends have formed a separate group of their own. Soon I'll be having children, cooking full-course meals and driving a mini-van. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Ooooh, sounds like a sexy weekend! ;) I love those kinds of weekends - where you just stay in and take advantage of all the alone-time! What they're doing at Jeremy's wellness center doesn't sound right to me. I don't think any place of business should be able to force an employee to participate in a public weigh-in - especially by threatening them with termination! That's ridiculous. He should contact someone about that because it really doesn't sound right to me. |
| from goingloopy : |
| When you get paid, you must go eat some REAL chicken fried steak...like at Black Eyed Pea, or Cracker Barrel. That shit is the bomb. And make sure they give you plenty of mashed potatoes with it. And piles of cream gravy. It's pure southern comfort food. As for Jeremy's work situation...that's bullshit. |
| from summerroll : |
| You're better off than me. I haven't even bought ANY Christmas presents yet and I have no money. And a 13% raise is nice...much nicer than the piddly 4% one I just got. And it'll make the bills go down smoother; even my shitty one helps some. |
| from mozangeles : |
| God, I totally relate to this entry. I remember the days when the boyfriend and I would scrounge for money, ask to borrow money, or live off of frozen food for months at a time. This Christmas and this new apartment are probably going to force us to live like that again. I am not looking forward to it. Money really bites. So does reality. xoxo - me |
| from clarity25 : |
| You have no idea how much I relate to your most recent entry. You're not alone with the financial strife. It sucks, doesn't it? especially during the holiday season. We have a credit card, but we're careful with it. We use it just to gain credit stats, and pay it back immediately. I know what you're saying though, it's SO tempting to use it when we can't afford to, ESPECIALLY around christmas. I also know what you mean about the debt, I don't want to get started on the pains of my College student loan payments. I'll be in debt forever. Try to look on the bright side, at least you only have a few more years. :)I hope things get better for you soon. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hey, thanks for your opinion on the boots! I'm leaning toward your suggestion, but I keep changing my freakin' mind! Geez! ;) |
| from clarity25 : |
| Great guest entry, Loopy. You know it never occured to me to get comfortable during my guest appearances, you know checking out the beer selection, kicking back and lighting a cigarette! lol :) |
| from makinganewme : |
| Those who hurt us, love us the most. It's not comforting, but it's true. I'm sorry they acted foolish. Jeremy apologized and took the step to correct things, so I guess he should be given a little credit. From the way you talk about him, it really took me off guard, I guess like it did you. Hang in there, we all love you!! Oh, and I'd love to read your weight loss diary. Maybe you'll be the motivation for me to start one!! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Oh, yeah! And if you do the biggest loser thing, I'd love to have the password. I can be your cheerleader! ;) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Wow, I'm sorry you had such a rough time with Jeremy and your dad. I can imagine that the situation with Jeremy must be very worrisome, but I would cut him some slack. As long as it doesn't happen again, then there shouldn't be any reason for you to stress about it too much. Alcohol does really odd things to people sometimes. As for your dad, he's obviously a total asshole. I know that doesn't make you feel any better, but it should. ;) |
| from summerroll : |
| You sound like you need a big 'ole hug. (((hugggsssss))) People in my family are like that too and even though it pisses me off to the point where sometimes I do cry, I don't spend too much time dwelling on it because I know they will never change. I wouldn't worry too much about Jeremy. I think you were right in assuming it was the alcohol. Plus, you've always said that he doesn't get drunk that much. I would worry if it was the opposite. Anyway, hope the rest of the week goes better for you. And I'd love to get the pw to you new diary when you start it. |
| from dieselengine : |
| I think you should try out for the Biggest Loser if that is what you want. And if you don't get picked, then you can do your website. You never know unless you try. I once auditioned to be a VeeJay on MTV and didn't make it. And guess what? It didn't bother me one bit because I knew thousands of other people were trying out too. You never know till you try. Good luck with everything. And if you would like to share the password with me to your new diary I would be honored. I know I am not overweight now but I used to be so I actually understand how it feels. Kudos to you. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm so sorry about the situation with your father, that's awful. I've had some difficult times with my own Dad growing up, so what you wrote kind of struck a chord in me. (it's a long complex tale) At any rate. I think your private diary idea is excellent. I'd definitely like your password when the time comes if you're willing to share. It's always good to have a group of supportive people as you work towards your goal, and just think how amazing it will be when you look back on it in the future and see your progress. Although. (And I know you don't want to hear this, but I'm going to say it anyway) based on the pictures you've shared, I think your weight is fine and that you're beautiful. But I know we all have areas that we feel the need to improve, I'm the same way. So I'm with you 100%. Take care! |
| from krugerpak007 : |
| My dad is exactly the same, probably why I am so "screwed up" after my childhood..I am sorry to hear also about your boyfriend. I can imagine how scary it must be when you have been with someone for so long and he suddenly turns in to a person that you don't know or recognize. Well actually, that has happened to me and my ex-husband. he has suddenly become a stranger to me. After 9 years thats scary. Anyway enough about me. I hope you cheer up and that you hang in there. At the end of that entry you sound postive. motivated in making some change. I wish I could be..Take care and good luck. Kathy |
| from formerlymr : |
| I'm so sorry you had such a bad few days. It hurts so much when those who you love turn ugly. And out of no where. Thinking of you, Hugs, Madison. |
| from saveahorse : |
| That is horrible what Jeremy and your father did to you. I would be a wreck if that happend to me. I think your Biggest Loser idea is perfect. I could not believe the changes in those people last night. Having a log and photos will hold you accountable and maybe motivate you more! Good luck! -Tammy |
| from mozangeles : |
| God sweetie, I am sorry to hear about what happened with Jeremy and Thanksgiving. To be honest, I was expecting my own father (whom it seems I have a similar relationship with as you do with yours) to act the way that your father did on Thanksgiving. I was still unsure of what to expect after the blow-out that my boyfriend and my dad had in April. Having said all that, I wish that I had something to say to ease the pain, but I know that nothing made me feel better when it happened, and nothing really makes me feel better when I think about my relationship with him. All I can say is hang in there. Oh, and I would love to read your new diary if you will let me. I have been contemplating doing something similar, but I do not think that I would ever have the courage to post pictures of myself. xoxo - me |
| from saveahorse : |
| That is horrible what Jeremy and your father did to you. I would be a wreck if that happend to me. I think your Biggest Loser idea is perfect. I could not believe the changes in those people last night. Having a log and photos will hold you accountable and maybe motivate you more! Good luck! -Tammy |
| from goingloopy : |
| Ugh, I hate that tearing down, emotionally abusive BULLSHIT. I am so sorry you had to deal with that. But I am interested in doing the Biggest Loser thing with you! What's funny is that I was thinking of doing something similar. I'll show you mine if you show me yours... :) PS-I about have your guest entry written, & I'll e-mail it to you tonight. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| sorry your vacation was a let down. that sucks :-/ i hope they both make it up to you and convey how WRONG they are about you. you're not a failure at all! and lastly, i think the journal will be a great way of keeping you motivated and i am interested in being a personal cheerleader for you :) |
| from pissymystic : |
| Welcome home! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Sorry your vacation was so sucky. That's the worst! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm sorry you had such a bad week:(. |
| from geekgurrll : |
| sorry your week was crap. hope things pick up for you. |
| from saveahorse : |
| I am sorry you had such a bad weekend, hopefully things will turn around for you! |
| from mathero : |
| I'm whoring my diary because what else do I have to do on a Sunday afternoon..? |
| from beckers-j : |
| Yeah, I've resigned myself to the fact that the holidays are pretty much never relaxing as long as family members are involved. It sucks. Give your cousin the cranberry juice treatment! ;) |
| from goingloopy : |
| Sometimes, when people are like that, it's because no one has ever told them to fuck off and quit. If she starts being a bitch, call her on it...and if she keeps doing it, don't hang out with her, no matter how much your family pressures you. It's your vacation, dammit, and you have the right to relax and enjoy it. |
| from krugerpak007 : |
| I loved your entry at Claritys... So I wanted to drop you a note, and I look forward to reading more of you. Take care. Kathy |
| from clarity25 : |
| Thank you for your Guest entry! I left you a long rambling note in the comments section. |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am glad to hear that you are feeling better today. From what I understand about panic attacks, they start out not so badly and get progressively worse with time if not treated (with medication) IF you have the full-blown disorder (like I do and my family does). Whatever ends up happening, don't be scared. There are a lot of us out here who can help you if have one again and who are here for you if you do end up having a panic disorder. I wish you the best! :) xoxo - me |
| from summerroll : |
| Glad to hear that you're doing better today. :-) |
| from saveahorse : |
| I have had anxiety/panic attacks for over 2 years now. They suck! You should definately get some sort of medication and see if it works for you. I have tried it all and nothing work, however now that you know what a panic attack you have the upper hand. I will say that when I get anxiety what I do is tell myself that I am ok and sometimes put my hands on my head. It makes breathing easier. Good luck! Good luck! Good Luck! |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am with Loopy. Talk to your doctor. I am on Lexapro, one of many medications for Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and depression, and it seems to be helping. Well, I have only been on it a week, but at least no side effects yet, right? Unfortunately, 99.9% of people who suffer from panic attacks have a chemical imbalance and that is what causes them to panic. You are experiencing flight or fight response. Trust me, I know exactly how you feel. I and my mom's entire family, are battling anxiety & panic disorder right along with you. My mom has been on Klonopin for years and has not had one major panic attack since she started taking it. Check it out. xoxo - me |
| from goingloopy : |
| I would talk to your doctor about it. Sometimes there are medications that can help...some of my friends have taken them. Plus, any excuse to get a Xanax or Valium prescription is a good excuse, right? :) |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| looks like i'm on the same track as everyone else thinking you may have panic attacks. you have mentioned being depressed lately and panic and depression unfortuantly sometimes come together. hopefully it was just 3 of them and no more hot flashes :) as for the DVR i've heard alot of good about DVR and not so good about TIVO, i'd go with DVR if it was me. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Yeah, that's what I was going to say...anxiety/panic attacks. That happens to me occasionally, too...usually in response to stress. Or it could be the flu. I hope it's not. |
| from mozangeles : |
| if it is not menopause or the flu, it may be anxiety or anxiety attacks. that happened to me when i first started having anxiety attacks. i hope it is not! xoxo - me |
| from clarity25 : |
| Sounds like a fun night! I have a book suggestion, but I don't know if you're going to like it. It's called "opening Skinners Box", it deals with Psychology. It tries to get to the root of human behavior and what motivates us to behave the way we do. It's the most fascinating book I have read in a long time, Eric and I are currently in the middle of it. If trying to understand your basic human desires and emotions interests you, then you'll like this book. Sorry, I read boring books. I wish I had a better suggestion. If you find a good one let me know, I'm looking for a captivating fiction book. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Golden Girls! That is awesome! I have been looking for Star Wars rings for a long time. Right now I have "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson. xoxo - me |
| from goingloopy : |
| Oooh, book dorking!! :) Jodi Picoult is my new favorite (fiction)...my favorites of hers so far are "My Sister's Keeper" and "Second Glance", but they have all been good. |
| from third-person : |
| Glad to hear that you're safe in the wake of this weekend's tornado. You're one of the Indy people I was concerned about when I heard about the storm on the news. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Try out...what the fuck? You could win $250K, and you know you'll be forced into good habits. I'm definitely considering it. I wouldn't care about the spandex if the end result was worth it. I do know what you mean about the not wanting to do the nasty when you're feeling ick, though. Perhaps a little "getting wasted" would be just the ticket...usually works for me. :) Hang in there...depression sucks the big hairy one, but it usually does get better. |
| from mozangeles : |
| God, you are like me. Pimples and zits can ruin an entire day/week/month for me. And if my hair is being unruly? Bitch Supremo. Before I gave in to the boyfriend a couple nights ago, I think it had been longer than 8 days. We were both sick, but I also just was not feeling like it. I have ruts like that in relationships. xoxo - me |
| from dvlsdisguise : |
| I'm the same way in the fact that it pisses me off more when people try to make me feel better because I, myself, know it's all sugar coated BS. People always tell me how "thin" or "cute" my body is even tho I could also be on that show. I think if I had a wish for one day, it would be to be someone else and spend the whole day with me so I could fully observe myself. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i think you see yourself much worse than what other people see. i think your friends see you better than you are because they love you and know you and personality enhances looks. MOREOVER, i think strangers, other people see you better than you are because they take the whole picture of you, they don't zone in on trouble spots like what we do when we view ourselves. we break ourselves into parts, good parts and bad parts. people tend to take in the whole you and as a whole people look better than they would broken up into pieces. makes sense? |
| from beckers-j : |
| You know, we are our own worst critics. I don't feel like I could be on The Biggest Loser, but I KNOW I weigh more lately than I ever have in my life. Still, almost every time I see any of my friends, at least one of them asks if I've lost weight or tells me I look tiny. It's so wierd because I know I haven't lost weight and could be several pounds smaller. I also know that I tend to be most critical of myself, so I'm betting it's the same kind of situation with your friends - they just don't see you the way you see yourself. Either that or they're insensitive as fuck! :P |
| from goingloopy : |
| See, I think they do look like what the scale says. I think Jen was pretty tall, but the rest of them are fairly average...except they all seem to carry the weight in the lower half of the body (other than Shannon)...of course, I still think the whole contest is unfairly weighted towards the men, since they all had much higher amounts to lose...and because even if the amounts to lose were the same, when they start with the body fat thing, women ALWAYS have more body fat. I still think they should do an all-girls and an all-guys one, to make it fair. |
| from mozangeles : |
| I understand what you mean. I am definitely plus-size and all of my friends insist that I am beautiful and look normal. I keep thinking, "Are they on crack or something?" Because quite frankly, although I would not mind losing weight for my health, I am quite alright being plus-size. You, however, did not seem to be big at all, at least in pictures I have seen of you. I know how you feel, though. xoxo - me |
| from beautyx3 : |
| The hot dog costume is hilarious. |
| from mozangeles : |
| I cannot wait to see those pictures of the two of you dressed up, one as a rastafarian, and the other as a hot dog! HA. I love it. xoxo - me |
| from pissymystic : |
| "Anyone else slightly freaked out by the Bird Flu?" I have nightmares about it. :( |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| congrats on your new addition! and welcome back. i'ved missed you. |
| from beautyx3 : |
| Congratulations on the new puppy!! Puppies are a lot of work but so much fun. He sounds cute too! |
| from mozangeles : |
| Congrats on the new doggie! I cannot wait to see the pictures. I hope all goes well with introducing your mini-schnauzer to Clyde. I know that my mini-schnauzer would be having NONE of that, but he is very spoiled. :) xoxo - me |
| from clarity25 : |
| Sorry to hear about the computer problems, I know first hand how frustrating that can be. congratulations on being new parents to a little doggie. I can't wait to see the pictures. It's funny but the mixture you described Doberman, Chow, Rottweiler, German Shepard..are all the breeds of dog that I fear the most! Maybe the descriptions of your future experiences with your new pet will help me get over my fears.:) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Yay for the new doggie! I can't wait to see pics of him! |
| from meandblake : |
| I hate bladder infections, you are so lucky that you don't feel pain. However, there is this thing called Azo, or Orzo, it's over the counter and it makes your pee orange, but it works well, it numbs your bladder. Good for you with weight watchers, I need to lose like fifteen pounds, but I just can't get motivated. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I didn't find that entry "boring" at all, They're always interesting to read. Thanks for your last note for my private entry. That really made me smile and feel better. Thanks a lot. I hope you enjoyed your weekend! |
| from goingloopy : |
| If it's been a whole week since you ate a lot...you're probably fine. And I think Ocean Spray does make some kind of sugar-free juice? I swear I saw an ad for it...if not, surely drinking lots of water will accomplish the same thing. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| yer LUCKY you have an H&M store. i only get to go when i fly north.. which is like.. once or twice a year the past 2 years. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hey, I'm making chili tonight, too! :P |
| from mozangeles : |
| If you do not mind me asking, where do you live where they have canals?? xoxo - me |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Way to go on your diet! Keep it up!! You'll look just marvelous, darling. |
| from geekgurrll : |
| hi - you can get cranberry pills in the vitamin section. Basically does the same thing, but might take a few days to get into your system. Take care. |
| from mozangeles : |
| happy belated anniversary! it sounds like you had a lovely time. i am happy for you. xoxo - me |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| someone got shot in your bed haha. priceless. we have a melting pot in houston too. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Yay for fondue and sex and Phase 10 (I love that game!) And people should quit asking you, already...not like you won't tell us the second you are engaged. :) Congrats on the weight loss. |
| from icyjewel : |
| Hi there, thanks for the note and questions. I tend to get that alot. I guess the best way to sum up what happened to me is on the "my story" link on my diary page. It's an essay I wrote earlier this year about everything. More has happened since then, so if you have any other questions, please ask! I really appreciate it when someone is curious. :) I hope you are having a good weekend. |
| from kris-tee : |
| I love you, your note was great!!!!!!!!!!! Leave me another one if you get bored!!! Oh and tell your girlfriends, its not the size of the ring that matters it's the size of his heart, oh wait, I did that the first time I was married, yeah, ok, go for ring size. |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| I saw the upside of anger..it was really cute:) LOVE THE SHOES AND THE LOVELY NOTE. take care dollface:) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| your grandfather looks so sweet. i'm glad you had that intimate moment of clarity with him... |
| from summerroll : |
| Good for Jeremy! Love the shoes. I always by cute shoes like that and then forget that I can't walk in them; I wear flip-flops everyday. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Aw, that was so sweet of Jeremy! Yay! And I saw The Upside of Anger when I was visiting my parents Upstate. It's a really, really good movie. It was really funny and poignant, and there's a really interesting twist to it as well. |
| from makinganewme : |
| The nails and toes are too cute. I'm glad you had a good weekend! The book sounds awesome, definetly let me know if I need to go grab a copy! |
| from mozangeles : |
| Aw, when I read about your grandfather puckering up for a kiss, I almost shed a tear! That is too cute. I am glad that you still have him around. I never got to meet one of mine, and the other also has little to no idea who I am. xoxo - me |
| from aliboomboom : |
| You should get photobucket. It works better. I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather. I know how hard that must be. Losing my grandfather was one of the hardest things I've ever been through and we weren't even close. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Before you add the pictures to your image host, make sure you crop them...if you're using Windows Explorer, right-click on the pic, click "Edit", and then in Paint, go to "Image" and "Stretch/Skew". You can make it smaller, and crop it, and play with it. I usually reduce mine to 30-40%, and don't have problems...but it depends how huge they are to begin with. Hope this helps...I wanna see pictures! :) |
| from mozangeles : |
| "I, on the other hand, am a social worker who lives in an apartment with her below average (in my father�s eyes) boyfriend." That reminded me of a whole hell of a lot of things with my father (whom it seems I have a similar relationship to as you have with yours). He once told a Col. in the Air Force that he was SO proud (sarcastically) of his English major starving artist daughter who slung coffee for a living (when I worked in coffee) and his son who wanted to go live on a reservation with the Native Americans (my brother graduated with a BS in Nat Amer Studies from Berkeley). I have always hated him for that. That and the fact that he told my mother that he had us because SHE wanted us...not to mention the horrendous fight that he had with my "below average" boyfriend on my mom's birthday. We should swap horror tales sometime. If anything, just to feel that we are not alone! I am sorry you have to go through this shit - it sounds too familiar to my family. It makes me sad. My family does not even celebrate holidays anymore. It is pathetic. xoxo - me |
| from beckers-j : |
| It sounds like your bitch-sister-in-law could use the cranberry juice treatment, eh? ;) And maybe your dad, too! |
| from formerlymr : |
| Psssttt... |
| from portia12 : |
| What I meant was, he should be paying his share without you asking him, that is a pain for you to have to ask him! |
| from portia12 : |
| I see how you were disappointed with Jeremy, and I realize it is the thought that counts, and even if he had thought himself to make you dinner it would have meant a lot. But you must also keep in mind all the chores he does around the house. My boyfriend does not do dishes if I am here, he does not do laundry and he does not clean. Maybe cause he's European?! Appreciate Jeremy's efforts all year round. I think he genuinely didn't mean to hurt your feelings, he's a guy and aren't they less caught up with occasions? As for the bills, maybe sit down and have a more official system in place. You shouldn't be asking him for his share of the cable bill, I think it should be already set up that you are both paying fifty fifty. Like, if you have money automatically taken out of your account for one thing, he could have money taken out of his account for something close in the amount. Belated Happy Birthday! |
| from mozangeles : |
| First of all, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! Secondly, it is lovely to have you back. I missed you. Finally, this sentence reminded me of my relationship! "What he doesn�t realize (or care) is that I have to pay the bills no matter what � even if that means I don�t buy new clothes or go on vacation." It is an ongoing battle with my boyfriend to pay bills. That is why they are ALL in MY name. I do not trust him to pay them. He cannot even remember to pay his own bills on time, and I cannot even count how many times he has either ALMOST or HAD his phone shut off, even though he had the money. It is aggravating, and it is something I talk about a lot in therapy. We need couples counseling, too. It might not hurt you both to try it, especially since you are living together. Just a thought! xoxo - me |
| from beckers-j : |
| Happy belated! Sorry to hear Jeremy behaved like such a douche on your birthday. I hope he gets his act together for your anniversary! :) That's so great that he'll be making more money, though. That will make things easier on you. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Happy (belated) birthday...and congrats on the weight loss. I'm glad your mommy gave you good birthday stuff. Sorry Jeremy is being a jackass. I hope that his newly larger paychecks will ease some of the strain. In the meantime...think about this. One or two late payments on utilities are not going to destroy your credit. He knows that you will take care of him. Don't. Don't pay the bill, or just pay your half and let the shit get cut off...and then make him pay to get it turned back on. Do this once or twice, and he'll get the picture. |
| from summerroll : |
| That sucks about Jeremy. But at least you have a bunch of new things (that you didn't pay for) to console you. It sound like the rest of your birthday weekend was good though. With Jeremy's new job, things should get better. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I enjoyed the catch up entry. Sorry things have been so stressful and difficult lately. Happy Birthday in Advance! I hear you about birthdays though. I'm the same way. I hate being the center of attention and it always makes me uncomfortable. I just want it to go by FAST. Also I understand the financial situation, since I'm in the same rut. I hear you, completely. Oh and as for letting things slip out after a few drinks. I'm guilty of the same thing and later on I regret it. "Oops..darn it!" ah well, so is life. |
| from summerroll : |
| Sorry for your shitty week. I think it's been going around. I think it's fine if you don't want to talk about your friends' trip right now. It's hard to be happy for other people (not that you don't want to be happy for them) when you can't even find anything of your own to be happy for. That's how i feel most of the time. But hang in there. Sounds like you're gonna have a good birthday weekend though (wish I had someone to give me massages when I needed one). |
| from mozangeles : |
| Oh my, how our lives sound parallel. For most of the time that we have been together, the boyfriend and I have not been able to afford to buy each other presents for our birthdays. And people ALWAYS ask. And they act like he is not a good boyfriend if he did not get me anything and vice versa. It is terrible. This year, we are going to San Fran for my birthday, but I told him I wanted to make it a joint trip for his and mine (since I got him nothing during his birthday cuz I was broke). I understand how you feel. I started avoiding my friends because I did not want to hear about all the things that they could afford or have the time to do that I could/did not. I lost a lot of friends by being that way, but I think that I would have realized that our lifestyles are too dissimilar anyway. I really enjoy meeting people who are on the same wavelength that I am on; I think you will find this, too. xoxo - me |
| from lisarookie : |
| Good luck with WW. My mom does weight watchers. She went from a size 16 to a size 4. It didn't take her long. Maybe 8-9 months. But that woman has discipline. She never gained a pound. She only lost every week or stayed the same. She also looks about 15 years younger. She is 57 and could pass for a 40 year old. |
| from evildilara : |
| My birthday is tomorrow...I turn 28 too! Happy early birthday! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I think that you should talk to them before your birthday because if you dont' then you are going to look like the sad, jealous girl because you can't evne talk about their vacation and if you dont' talk about it now then they are going to talk about it at your birthday and then you'll be even more pissed. The thing you have to remember is that they didn't do anything wrong. They asked you to, they wanted you to go. You tend to blame a lot on them when really they haven't done anything but be good friends and enjoy their lives. I hope you don't get pissed, that's just the way I see it. |
| from rae2005 : |
| hang in there. hopefully the coming weeks wont be so stressful, but i know how easy it is to feel overwhelmed. :) |
| from beachbride06 : |
| Ya too bad, yours is the first one i sign on for... havent seen you in some time.. but i know your bday is fast approaching. love ya girl! :) update why dontcha! i miss you.. id rather read you than update.. maybe i should update too :) MUAH! |
| from evildilara : |
| Yes, I have noticed you've been gone...please update soon! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I had 23 years of Santa visiting our house, It didn't stop until my youngest sister was about 7 or 8. (I have a lot of little brothers and sisters..it never ends. WE all had to keep it going for the younger ones. haha) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I heard about that but I didn't know if it was a scam or not. I think you could donate money somewhere to give to Kaysar. It's too bad he won't be on the jury. I hate Jennifer. She's evil. And she thinks she's such a big deal. Ugh. I can't stand her.I honestly think she's the worst person ever on BB. I wish we got to see the wrap party, that should be interesting. I wouldn't have known that Janelle had extensions either except they are always talking about it on live feed. The Sith call her "polyester hair", they are so mean! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I could too. I love this season. I think the picture of Ivette's girlfriend was a lot worse than she actually looks. She was almost cute on the show yesterday. I wish they would all stop talking about how ugly people are. On the recap boards, the Sith are always talking about Janelle and how fat she is and how much weight she's gained and how bad her pubic hair is and blah blah blah. They are so freaking jealous though. And the thing is Maggie and Ivette are both still bigger than Janelle so they just look dumb. I wish I got live feed but I fear I would be on it all the time. It seems like all the nerd herd does is bad mouth Janie. And then last night she asked them if htey wanted to stay in HOH with her and they said yes and then they didn't go up there. I mean what the hell? I think Janelle has the chance to win it all. I think she should get rid of Maggie this week because Maggie has actually won some things and then work on getting rid of Ivette. Janelle's a smart player so hopefully she'll do what she has to do. I wonder if we'll get to see Kaysar again before the show is over. I love him. I want to marry Kaysar. I really don't see why Janelle likes Michael, he's got horrible teeth. Yuck. She should go for Kaysar totally. They also always make fun of Janelle's hair, I don't think her extensions look bad at all. I really think the Sith are insane. They are going to be shocked when they realize America hates them. How do they not already know? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I could too. I love this season. I think the picture of Ivette's girlfriend was a lot worse than she actually looks. She was almost cute on the show yesterday. I wish they would all stop talking about how ugly people are. On the recap boards, the Sith are always talking about Janelle and how fat she is and how much weight she's gained and how bad her pubic hair is and blah blah blah. They are so freaking jealous though. And the thing is Maggie and Ivette are both still bigger than Janelle so they just look dumb. I wish I got live feed but I fear I would be on it all the time. It seems like all the nerd herd does is bad mouth Janie. And then last night she asked them if htey wanted to stay in HOH with her and they said yes and then they didn't go up there. I mean what the hell? I think Janelle has the chance to win it all. I think she should get rid of Maggie this week because Maggie has actually won some things and then work on getting rid of Ivette. Janelle's a smart player so hopefully she'll do what she has to do. I wonder if we'll get to see Kaysar again before the show is over. I love him. I want to marry Kaysar. I really don't see why Janelle likes Michael, he's got horrible teeth. Yuck. She should go for Kaysar totally. They also always make fun of Janelle's hair, I don't think her extensions look bad at all. I really think the Sith are insane. They are going to be shocked when they realize America hates them. How do they not already know? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I could too. I love this season. I think the picture of Ivette's girlfriend was a lot worse than she actually looks. She was almost cute on the show yesterday. I wish they would all stop talking about how ugly people are. On the recap boards, the Sith are always talking about Janelle and how fat she is and how much weight she's gained and how bad her pubic hair is and blah blah blah. They are so freaking jealous though. And the thing is Maggie and Ivette are both still bigger than Janelle so they just look dumb. I wish I got live feed but I fear I would be on it all the time. It seems like all the nerd herd does is bad mouth Janie. And then last night she asked them if htey wanted to stay in HOH with her and they said yes and then they didn't go up there. I mean what the hell? I think Janelle has the chance to win it all. I think she should get rid of Maggie this week because Maggie has actually won some things and then work on getting rid of Ivette. Janelle's a smart player so hopefully she'll do what she has to do. I wonder if we'll get to see Kaysar again before the show is over. I love him. I want to marry Kaysar. I really don't see why Janelle likes Michael, he's got horrible teeth. Yuck. She should go for Kaysar totally. They also always make fun of Janelle's hair, I don't think her extensions look bad at all. I really think the Sith are insane. They are going to be shocked when they realize America hates them. How do they not already know? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I just voted for Janie for America's Choice like twenty times. I just know that she'll win. Who else would people choose? Those girls are so jealous of her. It's almost embarrassing. And I thought about the whole Ivette voting for Janelle thing but she hates Janelle so much, I just don't know if she will do it. I wouldn't rely on her, ya know? And I think America should have something to say about who wins, shouldn't we get a vote? Also how glad are you that James is in the sequester house? He is totally being mean to JEnnifer. She deserves it. I can't wait till she gets back in the real world and realizes that everyone HATES her. She's the worst. Also Janelle got a kick ass HOH basket. Her mom sent her more makeup and "fat" clothes because she's gaining weight, isn't that cute? That is so smart of her mom. Also it said on the live feeds that Janie rated Michael a 9.5 and Kaysar a 9.4 so maybe Kaysar and Janie will end up together after all? And why does she like Michael, he's an artist. Didn't the friendship always say she was a golddigger? |
| from pouncer : |
| YEAY BABY OC's TONIGHT!!! I've waited all summer for this moment...j/k. Although it's kinda true :) Congrats on Jeremy gettin more money and hopefully nicer bosses!!! |
| from madisonrae : |
| Thanks Chica!! But can you believe my eyes are Grey with gold around the middle. Weird huh? My dad has grey eyes too! BTW... Tell Jeremy congrats on his new job. I can hear it now. "A girl from California whom neither of us know, says congrats on your new job!" We D-landers are so funny. |
| from summerroll : |
| I didn't make a TV chart...I'm just using the ones that came in the recent EW issue. I was planning on cutting them out and pasting then to a piece of cardstock. Glad to know I'm not the only dork out there. Mmmm....fondu! |
| from beachbride06 : |
| You and your tv chart... DORK! kidding.... I watch all the shows you do... Maybe .. just maybe will I ask ya to share it! I love FONDUE.. do they have the restaurant THE MELTING POT In Indy? :) IT is the BEST fondue place EVER!!! Expensive, but good....... enjoy tonight... CALIFORNIAAAAA... CALIFORNIAAAA.......... YAY! |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Awwwe, I want the thing that tells about tv, I never know what channel the good shows are on! I only really know about The Real World and Laguna beach! My e-mail is [email protected] I hope that you have fun at the fundue party! I have no idea about all of that stuff! So, I don't know if it's enough food or not! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Now you've got me craving fondue! Yum. I really doesn't sound like enough food, so I agree. And I CAN'T WAIT for the OC! Yes! |
| from evildilara : |
| Yeah, I would say that might not be enough food because one time me and two other friends did a whole pot of cheese AND chocolate by ourselves and we are not very big girls. It is just because you are picking at it and you don't realize you eat a lot more than you normally would. I know you are short on money but maybe get some broccoli or cauliflower to go with the cheese. It is cheaper than most other things and they will fill up on that first and then not eat as much as the chocolate stuff. And maybe get some more lettuce (just buy a head of iceburg to mix in with the stuff you already bought, it is only 99 cents). Maybe you could ask everybody if they could spare another dollar since it ended up costing more than you planned? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I forgot the OC started tonight. I'm stoked now. And yeah it doesn't sound like enogh food, everyone should get a burger before they come!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Good for Jeremy. A $3 raise should help a lot. That's an extra $120 per week, you could live somewhere nicer or something, right? I'd love to get a raise of $3 per hour and even if he's only making $15 per hour, $18 per hour is almost $40,000 a year and that's not terrible for a massage therapist. Be positive! |
| from goingloopy : |
| Yay for Jeremy...and every little bit helps. Sounds like you have a fun week coming up...try not to get any more resentments, girlie. Life is too short. :) |
| from mozangeles : |
| I do not believe that is legal! Is it a small company? Oftentimes, small companies make up their own rules and regulations. I am still not sure of the legality of it, though. Congrats to Jeremy on the new job! That is ab fab. And good luck on quitting smoking. If you ever need to vent about it, I am here. I quit smoking in January, and so far, so good! xoxo - me |
| from summerroll : |
| Congrats to Jeremy for getting the job. Hopefully this will alleviate some of the financial pressure off of you. And Frozen food isn't that bad; I like it, but I'm with you...If I had more money I'd be eating better stuff. |
| from claritynew : |
| I agree, those are important questions that should have been asked and I can understand your frustration with the stupid woman accusing you of having trust issues because you feel those questions should be put on the table and answered. Ugh. Have a good weekend! |
| from kris-tee : |
| Yeah, those are good questions he should have asked. Oh and to tell you a good story about the cranberry juice.... Back when I was single, my three bestfriends and I would always go out, we were crazy, Christina, Christie and me. Well, we had a friend Heather, who was in love with this real asshole, he never let her hang out with us, he hit her, he emotionally abused her, ect. So, one night, for our friend Christie's going away party, they came, him and her, well, he was wearing this white collar shirt, they got in to an argument, she leaves and goes home. A couple hours later, we see him KISSING some other girl, my bestfriend Christina goes to the bartender, gets a cranberry juice and pours it allll over him, the BEST part about the story is, he went to like, go after us, and HE got kicked out, even though she through the juice all over him. It was hysterical! Oh, and one more story about throwing/spilling drinks.... I had this friend Holly, whom I'm really not friends with anymore because she is fake and phony, but anyway, her boyfriend that she lived with had sex with someone that we were friends with, not good friends, but like, if you see them out, hey how are you doing friend, so needless to say, we were all really pissed because this girl KNEW they lived together and were bf/gf, so, we go to this club in Baltimore, (this is like months later after she moved out) it has like five floors, and you can stand there and look down and see the people dancing on the bottom floor, low and behold, we see the girl, Holly takes her entire beer and pours it all over her, so of course, the bouncer grabs us and starts to kick us out and Holly tells him how she slept with her bf, ect. and he lets us stay! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Oh my God, you are hysterical with the cranberry juice! :) And you are not "fat frumpiness". Please. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| You can look at Beach Bride's info, you just have to go directly to her profile because she doesn't have it linked from her diary. She's on my buddy list if you want to do that. Also I worked at a spa and spa girls are gorgeous. I wouldn't like that either. |
| from beachbride06 : |
| Liz.. OH MY GOD.. I am still cracking the F up... Cranberry juice...... you just made my day....I am hungover at work on a friday and you.. my dear, are my most favorite!!!!!HOLY CRAP... have a great weekend!!! :) |
| from portia12 : |
| Jeremy sounds like me. Please, I'll work for free! I was going to ask about Rupert. The only two things I know about Indiana: Rupert and the old tv show my brother and I used to watch "Eerie Indiana". I don't know if anyone remembers it. It was these boys and weird things happened in their town. |
| from madisonrae : |
| Jarred from Subway is from Bloomington. Maybe he's a client. (HeeHee!!) I'm with you on the job interviewing deal. I ask all those questions and then some. I bet he'll ask next time!! (But hopefully there won't be a next time and he makes lots of $$ at this place.) -MadisonRae |
| from mozangeles : |
| First off, I have to tell you that I started laughing when I read about Jeremy's interview. Sounds TOTALLY familiar, unfortunately. And why the hell did he call and tell them that his girlfriend wanted to know all these things? He must have been embarassed and was pawning it off onto you. Still, for shame! But, you know, during my boyfriend's first week of work, his co-workers asked him if I had a tight rein on him and controlled whether he could hang out with them socially or not. That pissed me off! At least I got over it and made nice nice with his co-workers. And do not feel bad about Jeremy working with facials, etc. My boyfriend works with teddy bears! HAHAHAHA! xoxo - me |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Hey~ I just got a new job......."Supposively" I don't know how much money I'll be making either. Everyone asks me that and I have NO idea!! Maybe that's just how it goes. Idon't know my hours or anything! Or when I start! So, I guess I just wanted to leave a note telling you that Jeremy isn't alone. I don't know why companies don't just tell you either ya know? it seems strange to me as well! I hope that you have a great time with the girls tonight! |
| from pouncer : |
| Hello there! You know what's scary is that I'm already 26, so I'm not much younger than you in time, but probably in mind ;) Here's wishing you feel the happiest you ever have, SOON! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Boobs and Eyes! Yay! ;) We have so much in common. |
| from alwaysaroura : |
| Your time will come, you have to believe it. I know it's hard right now but one day soon you'll be able to look back and think wow I can't believe we got through that. My life was a mess a year ago and look at it now, it's exactly what I wanted it to be. Be patient, it'll all happen for you. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I hope things get better for you soon, sending positive vibes your way and "creepy internet hugs":). |
| from beachbride06 : |
| hey chica... the only way i can figure it out (notse that is) is that you have to go to my profile then click on "send a note to beachbride06"... i dont know how to resolve it the other way.. i can give you my password if you can figure it out.... hmmm |
| from beachbride06 : |
| how do i turn on my notes? what is wrong with me!!! :) I will try... ali left a note, but i guess teh settings changed.. who knows, ill play around with it.. Have a great GIRLS NIGHT!!!! ;) p.s. Money DOES Suck! |
| from mozangeles : |
| While you are on the tire-slashing rampage, why not snip the antenna? Those sucks are expensive to replace. I used to do that in high school to people that I hated. Evil! xoxo - me |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Life doesn't always work out the way that we want it to or the way we imagined it to but it eventually works out. It could work out even better than you imagined. Keep your head up, you have Jeremy, you're healthy, you have a job, etc. It could always be worse. It's hard not to get frustrated though, trust me I know that. |
| from horseshoes : |
| I hope the money thing comes around for you. I think you should just pack up and move to Aspen or work on a cruise ship. If he's a masuse (sp?) that would be really good money and you would be on a permanent vacation! |
| from portia12 : |
| Hi girl, you should try it with the songs. I only posted forty so far, because I ran out of time. I know what you mean, some of the songs I was like? what the heck? What was your grad song? Ours was "Say Goodbye" by Madonna and somethin else. Are you going to your reunion? |
| from madisonrae : |
| We have similar sisters-in-law. I'm so sorry. It sucks so bad. I feel your pain.--MadisonRae |
| from beckers-j : |
| Unfortunately, I don't get much romance these days either. Every once in a while it starts to get to me, but most of the time I'm just happy that Ted and I have such a comfortable and close relationship. And we always have fun together, which is more important than romance. Most of the time. :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| That sucks about the carpet, it's so something I would do and then I'd be pissed for a week over it. Oh well. As for romance, it's only fun if it's spontaneous so give him time, he may surprise you!! |
| from beachbride06 : |
| God, I miss being Jennlynn24.. hehehe :).. but its still me......this is soo funnny:(every weekend so I can party it up with my friends � he parties it up too, but he�s a much better drinker and driver)..... we soo need to hang out... i think we would be a bad influence!! DRINK IT UP!!!! :) |
| from goingloopy : |
| I do like the longer hair, and it certainly looks shiny and pretty in the pics...and you are gorgeous, so preen all you want. :) Fingers crossed for Jeremy on the job, and also that your SIL stops being a ho. Oh, and happy belated birthday! |
| from kris-tee : |
| WHAT IS IT WITH SISTER IN LAWS??? Although your situation is entirely differnt then mine, but still. I have to say, I have a brother that is two years younger then me, and I am LONGING for him to get a girlfriend, I usually love his girlfriends and become really close with them, I could not IMAGINE being mean to any girl he brought home, but let me tell you what, I would be so mad if I were you. I would also be mad at my brother. I would kick his ass I think. So would my mom. I swear, that would be such a nightmare to even think about, she sounds horrible. You know, I hated, HATED my sister in law at my wedding and I still invited her to get her nails done with us, (even though she did not) but I did tell her we were all doing french manicures and I had her get her hair up. She sounds really mean. Hopefully they won't have kids anytime soon, because then that makes it even harder. I'll pray for you guys, oh and about the job too, I hope he gets it!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I hope that he gets the job and I'm really sorry that your sister in law is such a bitch. Maybe she'll change? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I hope that he gets the job and I'm really sorry that your sister in law is such a bitch. Maybe she'll change? |
| from mozangeles : |
| I am sending good vibes your way and good luck for Jeremy! xoxo - me |
| from pouncer : |
| OMG!! I have that same problem with my new sister in law, they just got married 2 weeks ago. And she didn't evan make me a bridesmaid, nor did she invite me to the bachlorette party, whenver I'm around her and her friends, I feel like they've all been talking about me behind my back. My bro has stopped being my friend, which makes me sooo sad. But there's nothing we can do, he's whipped too! Oh well, I guess it's our brother's choice and we have to be good sisters and stick by them, no matter what right? I hope she gets nicer in time. |
| from evildilara : |
| It sounds like your sister in law is a total wet blanket. It sucks that she ruined your relationship with your brother. She seems like the kind of person who thrives off making other people miserable. You've tried to be nice and it hasn't worked so forget about her. If it hasn't worked in 6 years who is to say it will work now? On a side note, I will send Jeremy good work-related vibes if you send them to Sean!!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oops. Sorry. I work with someone who watches live feed so I always know what is going on!! I'll put up a warning next time!! I have to know spoilers. It drives me nuts if I don't!! I'm weird like that I guess. I will let you know that the POV is being questioned though...so maybe he really doesn't win? I don't know but if I find out, I definately won't tell you!! |
| from makinganewme : |
| You are so right! I never thought of that before. My grandma looks a lot like Blanche, so Michael is always teasing me that's her twin. Let's hope my Grandma isn't a closeted slut or something. Hahaha! I had seen the one that came on this morning before- my favorite part is where shes in the restraunt and she tells him if he doesnt want her she can damn sure find someone who does- and all the guys follow her out, including the one at the table behind her with another woman. Hilarious! |
| from pouncer : |
| Happy Birthday! Yeay for no cervical - (i don't like the bad word)!! And about the grandma thing, that's how my mom is when I ask people about it, they always say it's because she's jealous, maybe they're mad that we have it easier. I don't know I just think it's wrong. Hope your friends show you a good time, you seem worth way more than $25. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Nice. Here's some more TMI from me - Ted pulls my hair when it's in a pony tail when we do doggie. Yes, it is hot. :) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Happy Birthday! And my grandmother was the same way - she even told me once that she didn't like girls and was glad she'd never had one of her own! :) |
| from makinganewme : |
| I'm the same way (about sex). The week before I am all up for it. I hope they go on the road trip for you! I don't know why they wouldn't want to...it sounds like fun to me! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| They should totally do what you want to do. And why wouldn't they want to go? It sounds like fun to me. I'm always up for a short road trip. And what did your doctor say about HPV? Are you going to get it from Jeremy or is it only contagious during breakouts? |
| from beckers-j : |
| Cute pics! I looooove your hair in that first one (but I don't have a crush on you). :P |
| from mozangeles : |
| You are absolutely gorgeous. You both are. Gorgeous coupledom! xoxo - me |
| from mozangeles : |
| Congratulations on the negative pap! YAY! xoxo - me |
| from aliboomboom : |
| You are really too hard on yourself. You are adorable! I love the hair. I never fix mine. I'm such a bum. |
| from clarity25 : |
| Okay, I'm going to join the annoying chorus of people asking you the same question..Can I have your password too? I tried using the older one, but it looks like you've changed it..pretty please with cherries on top? [email protected]. If not, that's okay, |
| from mozangeles : |
| Is everything ok? :( xoxo - me |
| from justagal : |
| Let me know if you ever unlock your diary. I love reading your updates! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Why'd ya lock up, m'dear? Let me know when you're allowing visitors again. :) |
| from icyjewel : |
| Could I please get the password? [email protected]. Thanks and hope that everything is ok! |
| from saveahorse : |
| Hi! May I have your new password please? [email protected] thanks!!! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Hey there- I notice that I'm locked out... can I have the user name and password? [email protected] Thanks! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Hey there- I notice that I'm locked out... can I have the user name and password? [email protected] Thanks! |
| from horseshoes : |
| New pasword please. [email protected] |
| from makinganewme : |
| I'm just asking for the same thing 54564654 other people are. I guess someone was reading that shouldnt have? I hope not!! [email protected] |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| may i have the pw, dear? [email protected] |
| from mozangeles : |
| Hey there...realized I am locked out, too. Do you mind sharing? [email protected]. I hope nothing bad has happened! Thanks! xoxo - me |
| from lonelylatina : |
| can i please have the password? [email protected] thank you |
| from rae2005 : |
| Could I please get your password? I'd really miss reading your diary. |
| from summerroll : |
| Changed the password? :-(. May I get the new one, pretty-please? [email protected] |
| from vickithecute : |
| Can I have the UN/PW too please? [email protected]. Thanks! |
| from evildilara : |
| ah you are locked, can you give me the password pretty please? |
| from beckers-j : |
| I think the two of you look adorable in that picture. :) |
| from portia12 : |
| ohmygod, you two are sooooo cute!!! |
| from jess1976 : |
| You two are so cute!! You don't look bad at all. I love when you post pics! |
| from mozangeles : |
| Aw, you two look adorable! It is good to finally put faces with names. I think it is so cute that you go to NASCAR races. My aunt in Ohio goes to all of them. If Dale Earnhardt Jr. is slow or crashes even in the beginning of a race (on TV), she will turn the show off cuz she gets so pissed. Hee Hee. Oh, and the dress is David's Bridal! wwww.davidsbridal.com I only looked at David's Bridal for dresses and Robbins Bros for rings...I am not going to expand the search for other types of rings and dresses until the boyfriend gets serious about proposing to me! xoxo - me |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for posting pictures!! I think you are adorable!! The last picture is so cute!! I know that your weight and the way you look but you are so adorable!! I have issues with my looks too. I think it's just a girl thing!! The mullet lady is hilarious!! |
| from makinganewme : |
| I think you look adorable in the picture!! Aww!! Glad you had a good time. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Everyone always says don't sleep with him the first night but the older I get the more of my friends hook up with their boyfriends the first night and marry them. Jolene totally hooked up with Barrett the first time they went out. It's hilarious. The bus looks awesome. I think your girls nights sound fun. I don't like most girls but I suppose it's good to have girlfriends for certain things. Post more pictures!! |
| from vickithecute : |
| Ah, so many things to comment on and I can't remember them all. I was freaking out reading your entry cus I do all that stuff too - obsessive stat checking, color coding my TV schedule (well, I did back when I watched a lot of TV), me and my girls pulling out the calendars to book our Girls Nights (often months in advance), and the whole getting lost thing! I've often referred to my best friend Krumpet as Tigger to my Roo because Tiggers never get lost and she's always able to talk me home. Ooh, and luscious bus! |
| from beachbride06 : |
| Hey Liz... Its jenn.. I had to start a new diary.. i didnt inactivate my jennlynn24 but need to start a NEW... |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I love BB. I was so glad Kaysar came back. although it would be interesting to have Michael in the house. I hope James wins HOH. I feel bad for him. He has no friends in the house. It would be best for him to win, imagine the drama.I was in Louisville for the Derby in May but we did all derby related events. They have a great bar scene though and it's a lovely town. Enjoy your trip! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| hey girl!!! how do you track whos reading your entries? You can find out the exact location? What do you work for the FBI? kidding...... what does it say for me, being in jersey and all.. but what else.. i still read you religiously but dont update that often bc i was going to get rid of my account.. Damn Google.... so many key words got googled and i kept finding myself in random spots on the net.. scary! Any whoo...Your life is so interesting.. remember next time you in Jersey.. HOLLA! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| im reading from boston. just so u don't freak out :) |
| from mozangeles : |
| Yay for Steve Miller! Yay for sex! And um, YAY! Haha, anyway, I am a California reader, just in case you were wondering. xoxo - me |
| from saveahorse : |
| HI! I wanted to let you know that I really enjoy your diary! Sorry I never leave messages :( Anyways, I am from Minnesota... don't stop writing! |
| from rae2005 : |
| hey, i just wanted to say that i enjoy reading your diary and should have left a note sooner. i am from texas just to let you know. :) |
| from lisarookie : |
| I was REALLY busy moving and being prodded with needles so I can birth someone else's baby. At least I don't have to change diapers. |
| from makinganewme : |
| Can I ask where you got your stats tracker? I'd like to have one!! And when I look it will probably come up from some AOL IP. I'm in the Lone Star State! |
| from jeze18 : |
| hey, girl. just wanted to leave a note. I enjoy your diary, unfortunately, I haven't started my own yet. I will find a free moment to actually sit and type an entry of my own soon, but in the meantime, keep on posting, and please don't go away....by the way, I am from Seattle. |
| from lisarookie : |
| I noticed I am not on the love train anymore. :( Never fear I am from Arizona by way of Maryland. |
| from horseshoes : |
| When I locked my diary for a short period of time I found a ton of people that read and asked for the password. You might try it and see what happens. Just a thought. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I hate illegal readers. It's so annoying. My sister is the worst. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hey, thanks for the note. :) About a month ago, I had PB & J for the first time in years, and it was really good, so I know the feeling. :) |
| from portia12 : |
| Yay, I can see your pics! I was afraid that you had the same prob I had at first, with the little darn x's! But if others were seeing them, that's great. I liked the pics! My friend has a mini schnauzer, he is very cute. Very jealous of the boobs! |
| from chicagojo : |
| I read your "Scary Story" entry, and that really freaked me out. I once had a guy standing next to me at a crosswalk bend down and start to put his hand up my skirt. When I grabbed his arm and bent it behind him and yelled about what a dirty prick he was for reaching up my skirt, would you not fucking believe it that no one -- NO ONE -- said or did anything to help me contain him or to call over a cop. Unreal. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hmm, well I guess if other people can see them, then it must be my computer. That's odd, though, since I usually don't have trouble. I'll try to look at them when I get home. And I'm sure I'll be cleaning all night, but thanks for thinking of me. :) |
| from mozangeles : |
| My mini schnauzer's name is Bee Gee (my mom loves the Bee Gees), and yes, his ears and tail were docked because my mom got him from a breeder, unfortunately. We have always had schnauzers as pets; they are so adorable! We did have one, Scruffy, schnauzer/cairn terrier from the pound with uncut ears and a long tail. SO CUTE! I love them so much. xoxo - me |
| from beckers-j : |
| Can't see the pics! I wanna see the gratuitous boob shot! :) |
| from portia12 : |
| I can't see the images. Do they show up for you or is it my computer? Make sure the code is exactly right: <img src="http.//.....jpg"> |
| from mozangeles : |
| Aw, miniature schnauzers! I have one, ya know! His name is Bee Gee! He lives at my parents' house, though. Boo. xoxo - me |
| from clarity25 : |
| Your feelings are totally valid concerning feeling hesitant about sex again. I would feel similiar, I hope things work out and change for the better. P.S. Photobucket.com is a great free image hoster, it's fast and easy to sign up. Just upload the images and paste the code in your diary. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i think i would be grossed out too. but i'm biased, i'm already currently very grossed out by the thought of sex. makes me want to vomit. |
| from portia12 : |
| Hi single, I use ripway.com, it's free image storing. You basically upload your pics there, and then link to them by copying and pasting their URL. |
| from mozangeles : |
| My boyfriend does not have a STD that I know of, but if he did, I think I would totally think/feel how you do. Even though we are supposed to love our boyfriends and everything about them, I would not help but think of my boyfriend as "diseased" if he had something. And, I would be really hesitant to sleep with him. It feels mean to think that way, but it is the truth. xoxo - me |
| from jess1976 : |
| I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather and all the crap you have been dealing with lately. Hopefully things start to look up for you because you deserve it! You are a great person with such a kind heart. Hugs to you! |
| from beckers-j : |
| I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather. It still makes me ache to think about my own grandfather, and he died over a year ago now. Anyway, I recommend that you check out EvilDilara, PansyCline and BlueMeany. They all rock. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm so sorry for what you've been going through lately. Reading about your grandfather made tears to come to my eyes, I couldn't help it. I just felt for you so strongly, I imagined my own grandfather going through that and the pain I would feel to see that. I know it's something I will have to face at some point, losing my grandparents and watching the process. When you wrote about him saying "I love you", it just tore at me. I'm so sorry, I wish I had the words. Also, I'm sure it's not cancer. I'm not sure of course, but it's important to keep a positive perspective..just like you said in my note about a "Self-fullfilling prophecy", it's good to keep the right outlook. Thank you so much for the note you left, it really touched me and comforted me. Thank you so much. I really needed to hear the things you wrote. P.S. as for a diary, check out Beckers-J.diaryland.com. I think you'll like her, she's one of my fav.'s (I don't know you if you already have her on your list or not), also TheFlyingRat.diaryland.com is great as well. |
| from portia12 : |
| Hi singlegirl, thinking of you! And I seem to have found cookie in case you didn't find it yet: http://myspace.com/taylortheeverydayhero |
| from classygirl83 : |
| I'm really sorry to hear about all of the things that are going on in your life right now. You and Jeremy are both in my thoughts and prayers, as well as your family. Try not to worry too much, I know that's easier said than done, cause it probably is a beign tumor.. ***HUGGSS*** |
| from mozangeles : |
| Your life sounds like an emotional rollercoaster right now. How do you do it? You are so strong. I really do commend you, but I also sympathize with you right now. I know that everything you are going through must be really difficult to deal with. Take care. xoxo - me |
| from makinganewme : |
| Oh girl- everytime I open up your diary lately I have to shake my head and say to myself "thats too bad": you've gotta have faith though. Things don't always go as planned but they usually tend to work themselves out in the end. I'm so sorry about your Grandpa! I'm always here if needed! |
| from vickithecute : |
| Ack, I went through a scare like what you're going through a few years ago. Everything is okay now as I'm sure it will be for you, simply because you're on top of it and that's really the most important thing in this kind of situation. |
| from horseshoes : |
| Some diaries that I like are cowgirljules and skimwitted through 12percent beer. They are on my buddy list. |
| from horseshoes : |
| Sorry that you are having such a hard time. My grandpa passed away going through what you grandpa is going through. I got one smile from him before he died and I know that it was just for me. It's tough to let them go. Best wishes |
| from summerroll : |
| You did the right thing. Although, once that guy touched you, you should have beat his ass and then called the cops. That's what I would have done. Guys like that are probably used to women who don't do anything about it, which gives them balls to get that close. And when you feel uncomfortable, fuck being PC. When anyone walks to close to me, male/female, white, black, hispanic, I hold on tightly to whatever I'm carrying, give them a look so that they know they're in my personal space, and then move away. i would avaoid that grocery store for a while since that seem so to be his target area. Good luck with the pap smear tests. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry to hear about the HPV, I couldn't even imagine having any kind of STD, luckily I've never had any! Good thing to hear that it doens't flare up often, what a pain. Hopefully this doesn't cause any permanent damage, emotionally or physically. I'm sure you'll both get through it ok. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm sorry to hear about the HPV, I would be going through similiar emotions and all the feelings you expressed are valid. Yes, It IS very common, two of my friends went through the same thing, One friend had the frozen procedure done and hasn't had any flare ups in two years. At first she was freaked out at the news, but then everything just returned to normal again. I hope everything works out, that really is lousy news and I know it would bring me down too. But it'll get better. Thinking of you! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| this is what i'm afraid of. i waws naively thinking doug and i will only have each other.. oen and only and now. i'm terrified of sex. ME! terrified of sex.. (with other people) |
| from spoildangelz : |
| I always say, "Worrying is like paying interest in something you may never own." Don't worry about it right now until you find out for sure if you have it or not. If you don't, great! If you do, just be glad that it's not something worse. It's better to find out now than later. And I'm glad that you're being strong enough to want to find out. Anyway, I'm glad the South Beach thing is working out for you - how exactly does it work? I still need to lose 10 pounds...that's it, but it's the hardest 10 pounds ever! I might look into that and try it...I need some tips! :-) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I was just saying that I would definately be freaking out more than you. I think I would freak out more than I did when I found out I was pregnant. I think that because the whole time I was pregnant, I thought well at least I don't have an STD. Now I'm terrified of HPV. I am going for a pap smear soon and I'm going to ask her about it. I want to make sure I don't have it. I heard somewhere that over 50% of sexually active people have it!! Yikes!! I'm glad that you are handling it well. And who knows? You might not even have it. |
| from icyjewel : |
| Thanks for adding me to your favorites! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Well I hope that it works out somehow. Does it not show up in STD tests? I had those while I was pregnant and I was clean. I hope that I don't have HPV. I'll just die if I do!! can you still vaginally deliver children? I know some STDs prevent women from doing that. Is there an antibiotic that prevents breakouts? |
| from beckers-j : |
| I'm sorry to hear it was positive. As for cervical cancer, just become really religious about getting your annual Pap test and there should be nothing to worry about. The key is catching it early, and the Pap tests will help in that department. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Okay when you go to the doctor ask him about this. I just don't think that you could have had it for 2.5 years and not known. I think that one of you has had a different sexual partner while you've been together and since I know it's not you, it has to be him. You need to make sure that it's possible that it just popped up now. It seems awfully shady to me. And if by chance you don't have it then get out now. Sure you love him but do you want genital warts for the rest of your life. No. |
| from aidawrites : |
| People get STDs all the time, more than they admit. Can HVP be cured with antibiotics? Hope both of you are okay! I know how scary those things can be. |
| from mozangeles : |
| Our lives sound scarily similar...except for the whole HPV thing. I would say do not fret about it - but would I tell myself that? I think I might feel the same way that you do. When his penis is all healed from the frozen warts, I thik you two should have sex. I think this whole thing will eventually drive you two apart a bit. You have to get past it. A lot of people have HPV and their sex lives do not just cease. Good luck. xoxo - me |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm hoping it's just a mole or something. Yuck. I love Steve Miller! I wish he was coming here. We saw him once a few years ago, it was a good show. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm hoping it's just a mole or something. Yuck. I love Steve Miller! I wish he was coming here. We saw him once a few years ago, it was a good show. |
| from summerroll : |
| I sending positive penis-thoughts your way. I think you should go ahead with the Pap smear instead of waiting. It's better to make sure that absolutely everything is okay, even if Jeremy's bumps turn out to be nothing, just to stay on the safe side. |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Hey~ Wow, that is soo scary. I think that STD's in general are scary, I mean if you really think about it. If you touch a guys thing, and he has it, then theoretically, I think that you could might get it. I mean i don't know if you have to even have intercourse. I'd like to think that you would.......Anyways. I'm sure that Jeremy is ok.It might could just be a rash you know? I don'tk now that's definatly kinda scary though. I know that you're not the grosset person though. I think that you are great:) I don't know if this note is making anysense at all.......It's kinda all over the place sorry. I don't really know if we are going to the beach. My dad is really sick, and my sister thinks that it is a bowel obstruction,so I don't know. He's at the doctor now. I really kinda want this job at the Daycare, but I don't know. I guess I'm not getting my hopes up or anything at all.I have an hour to get dressed and get there, and I have no idea what to wear. I guess i Need to start on that. I hope that you have a great weekend. Sorry that this note is soo random and all over the place and that it doens't really make sense |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| oh, and might I add, I didn't have any visible warts, just a skin tag. My diary's username and passcode are ilove penguins |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| I had a scare with an ex where a nurse practitioner told me I had warts. All my paps are normal and my OBGYN agreed with me in that the lady was just trying to get some money out of me(because a visit is free and labs are extra) and that I did not have anything. It has been almost 3 years. My OBGYN also said it should only lie dormant for 6 months. So if nothing appears after 6 months, you are okay. Over 80% of women who have had sex have HPV(visible or dormant included) Is it possible he has moscullum(sp)? My bf got that even though he had never cheated on me...thinks he picked it up in the shower. Moscullum are very similar to HPV but are curable. Check out some information online. I'm thinking you're going through the same thing I did(humiliation, fear, regret) and I'm nearly positive you have nothing to worry about. Please email if you have any questions:[email protected] |
| from beckers-j : |
| I went through something very similar not too long ago minus the penis bumps, and it was horrible. It turned out to be nothing, though, so hopefully yours will be nothing as well. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I really hope it's not HPV. I think my roomate had that though, she had something that caused cervical cancer but it didn't ruin her life and she dated other people. I don't know anything about the warts thing. Let's just hope it's not that and if it is, I'd question if he was telling the truth about being faithful. I highly doubt that all the tests were wrong tha they did on you! And guys never admit that they cheated. Why would they? |
| from portia12 : |
| Hi girl, just in case you don't know (you probably do), if you want cookie's new website address leave me a note. I felt the same way when she stopped writing. And I didn't realize she had sent me a link to her new one, it was in with all my junk mail and I realized a while after. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| thank you for the note. i didn't know you were an accountant. i remember you mentioning you got your masters degree and it didn't help. eeks. that's what i'm doing too. this will be my last year. i hope everything is ok with jermey (and with you) healthwise, i know that can be scary. i've had my own scare like that too but everythign turned out fine. hopefully you too :) |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Hey girl, sorry i havent been leaving notes. I read you every day, you should know that.. i totally hear ya.. you are better than I am, because i have never gotten a test. I have had a bad history of having long term boyfriends (of 2 years at a tiem) and not use condoms. it is scary.. i am scared to take a test.... i really am.... i think the worst and would die if anything came up... i think i am straight on everythin, i should go to gyno more often, they scare me... the last one i went to said i had to get tests done bc i never had them.. i never went back to her. I am sure everything is fine with you though! No worries girl! LOVE YA! |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| Hi darling. My username and passcode will always be ilove penguins I'm actually unlocking my diary tonight though so no need for that:) And thank you for the wonderful note. I am so glad to have you guys:) |
| from clarity25 : |
| I liked your survey answers, it was interesting to read. The E-mail you wrote to your friends was really good. It's always a good thing to be honest, put things all on the table and just say what's going on inside. It clears the air and helps your friends understand where you're coming from. Hope everything went well:), Have a good weekend |
| from aliboomboom : |
| It sounds like you are doing better. I am glad that you talked to your friends. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Just catching up, sorry to hear you're feeling so bad lately. I go through that, too, everyone does. I have the bad hair days, the bad skin days, I have a big nose days (and I do), I'm fat days...even the ones we think are perfect, skinny and beautiful go through their own "days" as well. Are you sure you weren't just pre-menstrual? :) |
| from bethany9 : |
| Well, Old School is funnier, but VV is much better in this movie. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| It just bothers me because I can't shake the feeling that she had something to do with me and B not talking anymore. I mean she should have never emailed him in the first place and to think that he told me about it and not her. That's just shady. And then on top of it she bought Griffin like a $2 birthday present which might sound like I'm being shallow but that just sucks and I invited her stupid boyfriend and his kids that I had never met before. What the hell? It cost me more to feed them hot dogs then it did for her present and it was a t ball bat which he won't use for years and a blow up beach ball which he can't use. It's so tacky when people bring cheap gifts and don't put any thought into it at all. I need new friends. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| It should be fine. Let us know what they say. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| no they can't be that mad. you were being honest with your feelings. they'd be bitches if they got mad. |
| from horseshoes : |
| I know EXACTLY how you feel. I just keep getting bigger and I can't stop. I have NEVER been this big. I don't mention it in my diary because I'm embarrassed and it get's me down. I don't ride or do anything physical anymore besides chores and it's just not enough. Brian understands that I get upset about it too. I don't want to have a physical relationship because of it. I don't want to go anywhere that I have to dress up at all. I don't want to see my friends that haven't seen me in a year or two and know they are saying "Jeez she has gotten big". Then when you do get to feeling better about your body you go shopping and everything you try on accentuates every lump, bump, and roll. Plus, what is the deal where women are not sopposed to have any boobs? It's frustrating. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| i'm sorry to hear you're feeling down. i think all of us girls have had insecurities about our weight. when i was younger i had a cousin that was bigger than me. when i was in about 6th grade i got bigger than her & one of my relatives said 'oh look she's even bigger than angie!' i'll never forget how i felt at that moment and decided i didn't ever want to be in that place again. the only thing you can do now is what you are going to and change it. good luck hun and i'm sending you hugs to cheer up :) |
| from justagal : |
| You've got a goal, and are taking the steps to meet it. Everything is going to be ok. True beauty stems from within. The outside appearance is only a mask to either hide it, or enhance it. I know how hard it is to lose weight. I gained almost seventy pounds the first year I was married to my first husband. Walking an hour a day and cutting out sugar helped me lose fifty of those pounds, but it took a year. Be patient, and remember you can do it day by day. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i agree with jess. please don't define yourself by ONE quality of yours. it's not who you are. you're smart, generous, sweet, WITTY, hilarious, and pretty. You're a lot of things. You're an amazing girlfriend, a giving daughter, and a thoughtful person who dedicates herself to social work. You are so much more than you're giving yourself credit for. i hope you realize this soon and also i hope you find the support in your real life as you embark on your goals. we love you. |
| from jess1976 : |
| Gosh can I ever relate to your entry. I'm the big girl of my group of friends and it gets frustrating at times, especially when you're shopping for bridesmaid dresses and stuff, but just remember that they are your friends no matter what, thin or fat - they love you for who you are. It's tough though, I know - I live it everyday. It's so damn hard to lose weight too - I mean I should probably start working on it while I have time before my wedding, but one thing or another always gets in the way and becomes my execuse. Truthfully I like who I am and I think I'm beautiful, but I don't love my weight. The difference is that I don't let it consume me... you have to know it's something you want to change, but not let it become who you are. You are fun, pretty and a great person... the weight is just another one of your attributes. Don't let one attribute you see as negative ruin the rest of your great qualities! Hope you feel better soon. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm sorry that you feel the way that you do. It sucks to feel bad about yourself and it sucks to not have the body that you want. Don't be mad at your friends though, they weren't telling you they liked your skirt because they felt bad for you and they only wanted you in the picture because they like you. And they were probably concerned when you weren't acting like yourself. I think you are being too hard on them. Go on a diet, lose the weight and be happy! |
| from clarity25 : |
| You sound like you're feeling low and you're really beating down on yourself about your weight. We've all had moments of insecurity, self-doubt and self-loathing. Well, I know I have. I've called myself every name under the sun and lamented over so many things I wanted to change about myself. But I wanted to start by saying that I don't think you're fat. I can only say this from the photos you have posted, but I don't see you that way at all. But I also know there is a huge difference between the way people see us and the way we see ourselves. It's one thing to be on the outside and another to be in our own skin. I could tell you to be happy with yourself the way you are and to realize how truly beautiful you are. But I'm sure you've heard that a hundred times, and if you're like me. It just doesn't sink in, it sounds like people are just saying it in an obligatory way and I seldom believe the compliments people give either. I think they're just being nice. Plus you have to do what feels right and makes you happy. If losing weight will make you feel better about yourself, than I really support that and I wish you luck on the South Beach diet. I hope you're feeling a bit better today, and as for that girl..I forget the exact nickname you gave her. Slutty pants? That had me laughing. last night, Eric was flirted with by "A set of breasts", I have insecurities about my chest size, so whenever I see a woman with huge boobs in a tight tight revealing top, I instantly feel somewhat resentful and insecure. I understand those feelings, but of course you have nothing to worry about. Jeremy loves you deeply..wow, I'm rambling. I even have more to say. But I'll leave it at that. Have a good weekend. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| I remember you seeing fast results with weight watchers. I remember thinking, wow.. the lbs just keep shedding. am i losing my mind? i think no matter what happens, everyone will find something utterly repulsive about his/her body. with me, it's the damn scar, the zebra butt (i have white white stretch marks and a tan butt), the no boobies.. the uneven back cuz the scoliosis, etc) i think i nthe end, you need to chang ewhat you can and then.. THEN.. change your attitude. appreciate your body. love yourself. it's a conscious effortful continuous thing. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| I remember you seeing fast results with weight watchers. I remember thinking, wow.. the lbs just keep shedding. am i losing my mind? i think no matter what happens, everyone will find something utterly repulsive about his/her body. with me, it's the damn scar, the zebra butt (i have white white stretch marks and a tan butt), the no boobies.. the uneven back cuz the scoliosis, etc) i think i nthe end, you need to chang ewhat you can and then.. THEN.. change your attitude. appreciate your body. love yourself. it's a conscious effortful continuous thing. |
| from makinganewme : |
| I know! Halter tops put the boobs where they need to go! I just loved the colors in it-- Michael gave it a weird look at first but then he said it grew on him. I thought it was a very feminine way to put it, but whatever, as long as he likes it too LOL. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Oh my God, I know! I heard that about Bobby and Whitney! That's so freakin' gross I can't even stand it! Forget the crack, those two are whack either way. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm sorry you feel this way. I'm trying to lose weight too. It sucks but you can do it. You've done it before. I wish that you could go out and enjoy yourself now though. I feel bad that you are missing out on so much fun. Good luck. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| That is weird. Who would do that after just meeting a group of people? |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| weird. i don't think she was too keen on the girls liking her as much as she was keen on the boys liking her. |
| from bethany9 : |
| DL Fair by Remy Zero, if you don't have it already. This Years Love by David Gray and Pn De Replay by Rihanna are also two I have been loving lately. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Yeah, I never wear foundation, powder or blush, and I would say no make-up would mean just that - NO make-up. I don't know if I know anybody who wears foundation, powder or blush EVERY day. My every day make-up is mascara. I almost never go anywhere without at least putting that on. |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Thanks for the congrats! |
| from summerroll : |
| I wear eyeliner and light eyeshadow and lip balm and nothing else. I don't really consider it makeup. Plus, I can never find foundation/powder to match my skin tone since makeup companies seem to think that black girls only come in 3 shades. |
| from goingloopy : |
| In my world, no makeup means no makeup. A lot of times, on weekends or if I'm being lazy, I do the eyeliner-mascara-lipstick plan. I do usually wear foundation & powder, though....mostly because it evens out my stupid freckles. I'm so glad Jeremy got a job...and that the Biggest Loser starts again August 9th!! :) |
| from horseshoes : |
| I'm so jealous! I don't wear makeup anymore but I would die to have skin like that! Contgrats on your BF getting his job. That's wonderfull. One of my friends sisters works on a cruise line and makes REALLY good money doing the same thing. She loves the job and the travel. |
| from horseshoes : |
| I'm so jealous! I don't wear makeup anymore but I would die to have skin like that! Contgrats on your BF getting his job. That's wonderfull. One of my friends sisters works on a cruise line and makes REALLY good money doing the same thing. She loves the job and the travel. |
| from makinganewme : |
| Hey! Yay for his new job!! I wear foundation and powder on a daily basis. Sometimes bronzer- it depends how I feel. I feel naked without my makeup, but I wish that I had never started because I think makeup totally ruined my skin. I've got some uneven tones on my face and blah!!!! I don't want to think about it. I can pull off not wearing any- but it's not a pretty sight!! Lucky you for having gorgeous skin! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| hi. i only wear make up when i go out at night. and it only included blush, gloss, and eye make up. no foundation. i dont own any either. but im trying to wear make up everyday now.. (not today har har) but i bought primer.. and will buy tinted moisturizer and the two will team up to be my 'foundation/powder'. yup. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Bottom line: I love my LIZ! we soooo alike :) nite! |
| from horseshoes : |
| I'm done for the summer. I don't think work will let me take anymore. I still have to take accounting 2 and that just depresses the hell out of me. Bleh. I hate the whole process too. So depressing, I hope I got a B! |
| from summerroll : |
| I hear you on the background noise. I can't concentrate on anything unless I have the radio or TV on. I used to worry that I would fail tests in college because it was so damn quiet, so I would listen to my fave song over and over again right before the test so that it would be stuck in my head during. And it worked. I was always the first one finished. Gawd I'm a dork. Good luck with the firends thing. I was just like, always the one to make inital contact, and it was as if I was bothering them. And when I didn't call, then my "friends" would call back and ask me why I was being such a bitch and not talking to them. Needless to say, they aren't my friends anymore. |
| from aidawrites : |
| I think its totally normal to feel jealous and insecure about a girl "friend" of your bf. I would be the same way. He needs to be more considerate and ask you if she should be invited to certain outings. Personally I would be pissed if some girl was texting my man. Its not that we have low self esteem and lack confidence, its just the nature of the beast you know? |
| from aidawrites : |
| Yes :( unfortunatly he is a hunter, i know, i hate it. he eats buffalos and deer. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I love Laguna Beach. I cannot wait till it starts. I was convinced it was this month but it's not. Bummer. And yes sometimes I wonder why I still like stuff like that. I'll have a teenage kid and still watch Laguna Beach and the OC. I'm a weirdo. |
| from justagal : |
| You are a beautiful girl. You need to remember if Jeremy didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't. Don't let another woman who doesn't even matter make you feel poorly about yourself. |
| from spoildangelz : |
| Don't worry about the whole self-confidence thing...I think every girl has that problem - I don't think there are any that doesn't. I just want to reassure you that if Jeremy didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't be. I'm pretty sure he loves you and would never do anything to break your relationship. I sometimes wish I can take my own advise, but I get jealous all the time, too - sometimes for no apparrent reason at all - and I just try to control it....doesn't work all the time, though. :-) |
| from goingloopy : |
| Don't you wish there was a self-confidence button you could just push? Yeah. However, I do think that therapy is a good idea. It helped me a lot, at any rate. (I went from ages 23-27, but only like once or twice a month.) |
| from beckers-j : |
| I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather. My own grandfather passed away just over a year ago, and it was devastating for me. I know how difficult it is, and nothing anyone says is ever helpful. Side Note: Your grandmother is STUNNING in that photo. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Thanks for the vote. I'm leaning toward 3 myself. :) I actually find that shoes with a wooden sole and heel are more comfortable to wear when you're standing and/or moving around a lot. I don't know what it is. But I'm sure my shoes will be off before the reception is over. They always are. :) |
| from geekgurrll : |
| I'm really sorry about your grandparents. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| It is hard to know what to say when people go through things, ya know? I'm sorry you weren't more comforted by your friends. I don't think anything would comfort me in that situation though. It's just so very sad. I hope that doesn't make you mad, it's just all I can think of the entire situation is how tragic it is. It sounds like you and Jeremy have a nice weekend planned, try to enjoy that. Chin up. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I really hope that Griffin only has to have tubes once. He's getting the surgery next Friday. Say some prayers for us please. |
| from goingloopy : |
| I'm glad you're ditching the parties...I think it will be better for both of you. And I am so sorry to hear about your grandparents. You've had a lot to deal with, and the fact that you can write about it at all...and that you're surviving as well as you are..is amazing. Hang in there, girl. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| jermeys a good bf. i offered to take doug to a strip club throughout our whole relationship, he was always.. "ehhh... that's not for me." .. what does he do the first weekend broken up? go to a gentleman's club. fucker. |
| from classygirl83 : |
| awwww ***HUGGS*** and you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. |
| from makinganewme : |
| My grandfather had cancer. I know there really aren't any words. Just know I'm sorry, and my thoughts and all the prayers I have are with you! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| i'm so sorry to hear that things with your grandpa have taken such a terrible turn. my thoughts & prayers are with you & your family. take care. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm so sorry to hear about your grandpa. I wish there was something I could do or say to take away the pain. I think that your cousin ahs the right to know though. Wouldn't he want to say good bye? I don't know what to tell you, I will pray for you nad your family though. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| my thoughts are with you... |
| from jess1976 : |
| I'm real sorry to hear about your grandpa - I remember how rough it was for me when my grandpa was sick and dying. I hope that things get better for you :) HUGS!!! |
| from third-person : |
| You're coming to my hometown (NYC)! Let me know if you have any questions or anything. :) |
| from goingloopy : |
| I hope she's not mad permanently...but surely, she understands that a little herb usage is hardly on the same level as screwing married people. And you & Jeremy should totally come to Bonnaroo next year. It's a veritable herb garden. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I guess I'm lazy as well. I hate errands where you have to get out of the car and back in the car and blah blah blah. I hope she's not mad at you. That would suck but really she shouldn't be hooking up wtih married men. I did it once, its' not fun and it's not good for her mentally. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Hey girl!!! whats going on? Why are you going to NY and in such style! You know i live about 30 minutes from the city (NYC).... train in, train out! :) one of these days we will meet! Have a great day! sounded like your weekend was fab! |
| from beckers-j : |
| Yeah, I know where Skaneateles is. I'll be about an hour away from there this weekend! How odd is that? It's really nice there. I hope you enjoy your New York weekend! :) |
| from summerroll : |
| I saw your friend's brother's band this morning on MTV and I thought of you. It was a weird coincidence because I was about to change the channel when he MTV news came on and I decided to watch. Just thought I'd tell you. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Are you going to post a picture of your dress? And the penis straws? Pictures are fun, especially "drunken night out with the girls getting unruly (friends and boobs) pictures." |
| from clarity25 : |
| I liked reading your descriptions of your friends, Sounds like you had a fun weekend. Now I want to see that shirt!! hehe:)..take care! |
| from goingloopy : |
| I'm sorry if I made you feel neglected...I still love you. :) Today's two cents: wedding season sucks. I'm so glad most of my friends are over that shit...I know like 4 or 5 years ago, it was like every fucking weekend, and that got old...especially since most of them were too cheap to provide free booze. Good luck with the gym & WW...it's so hard to stay motivated. Hang in there, and know that you are beautiful no matter what. |
| from third-person : |
| I'm not mad! I just haven't gotten any notes from you after leaving you a couple, so I thought you didn't like me much. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry to hear you feel everyone hates you. I don't...just haven't been on in a while. I haven't been leaving notes for anyone lately since I started my new job, I just don't have the time. I never get notes from anyone either, but in a way, it feels like my diary is more private again or something. I don't know, and really don't care. I look at this thing as a way for me to look back on my life, not a place to make friends, I guess, although if you do, it's a nice benefit. Hope everything is going well for you, you are one of my favorite diaries to read! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I've been insecure ever since i gained weight as well. I hate it. As for celebs, I'm obsessed as well. What it is it, a sickness? Or are our lives just so boring that we have to live vicariously through others? I can't wait for hte MTV awards, I"ll try to listen to the song when Sandra is there. |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| wtf. grrrrrRRRR. I'm trying to leave a note and the damn thing keeps entering. So, as I have said two times already- OH GIRL-I am on the fat train with you. toot toot. Zach's leaving on Saturday and I'm working out after that! More power to us! |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| OH GIRL() |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| OH GIRL. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| oh hun i don't think anyone is mad at you. it has been really quiet around here and i thought maybe everyone left. |
| from horseshoes : |
| Sending some diaryland love! I think less people are online during the summer. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm really not mad at you!! I'll try to remember to write you more notes. I think everyone is just busy right now!! |
| from aidawrites : |
| I am soooooo mad at you! LOL JK! Love ya! and love your diary! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm not mad! In fact, I just logged on and saw the beautiful comment you left me in private diary. I was just about to come and say "Thank you" for reaching out and caring! I was away from diaryland most of the week..well, you know why. That's the reason I haven't left notes in a while. I have had days like what you just described in your entry. But rest assured, I'm not mad at you and I'm quite certain noone else is either:) How could they be? Cheer up, We all love you! |
| from classygirl83 : |
| I'm NOT mad at you. I too just don't have alot to comment on, but I love your diary. I will do better though! I hope that you have a great day, and a great weekend! |
| from jess1976 : |
| I'm not mad! I can understand how you feel though, I get that way too! I am completely oversensitive today and even cried at work because some dumb biotch yelled at me for no reason, and it's not even my TOM. Hope things are going well with you. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| I'M NOT MAD. I'm truly sorry for neglecting comments but I assure you it doesn't reflect how much I love your journal. When you update, I click on your name first among others. I guess I just don't have much to say. You seem level headed and things are running fairly smoothly and I'm just happy for you. I will try to do better. Shame on me. |
| from jess1976 : |
| Let me just say that Dan is 31 and he still thinks he is hysterically funny when he farts. Something tells me that this could go on for a long time. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hey, I was going to offer my services to help with your template, but it looks like you've already got a volunteer. :) Anyway, hope it works out! |
| from goingloopy : |
| I will fix it if you want...email the info to [email protected] (Diaryland email sucks my ass.) |
| from aidawrites : |
| Sounds like you have a lot of stuff going on. That's so wierd about your grandpa, the violin, i wonder where that stuff comes from. And how horrible about Nik. Why is he hurting himself? so scary. Oh and def. meet this "friend" of Jeremy's. I'm sure she's up to no good. I hope you feel better, i had the same flu, it was horrible, but i lost like 3 pounds when i had it, lol. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| He cut himself and wrote in his own blood? Are you sure. If so, that is SICK. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hey, thanks! Glad you like the new layout. I'm actually not very good with html myself, but I've picked up a few things just from tinkering with different templates recently. And we'll be sure to have a good date night! :) |
| from stillsingle : |
| Glad to hear you guys are still together! You'll get through this, everyone does! People go through tougher times than these, think if you had a child, too, whoa! Have you looked at furniture at IKEA? The way you described your decor is like what I've seen there and in their magazines. Decorating is so much fun, especially after the roommates move out! Have fun! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I forgot you were in Indiana, I guess me seeing Peyton at the Derby was a big deal to you too. Peyton played for UT (I'm sure you knew that) and I went to UT, we loved Peyton. He stayed and finished college instead of going to the NFL so we loved him. I met him a few times. HE asked me out once while I was still in high school .Man if I had only known then. Wait I think it was him who stayed as opposed to going to the NFL. Anyways it was. Now I am obsessed with Eli. So hot. And that sucks you've gained all that weight back. I would be pissed. |
| from clarity25 : |
| Thank you for your last note. I'm so sorry about the situation with your grandfather. It's hard to say what is the right thing to do in a situation like that. It must be so painful for your family. I wish I had the right words. Also , I DO believe in self-fulfilling prophecy. If you believe in good things happening and you put these feelings, hopes and prayers out to the universe. Alot of times it comes back to you in ways that you wouldn't expect. Have a good weekend:) |
| from summerroll : |
| Which dress did you go with, Number 1 or Number 2? I'm dumb with colors so I'd classify em both as turquoise. I'm glad things are starting to look up for you, or rather, you're starting to look up for yourself, if that makes sense. I think you get what I mean. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Like the new template, and I'm glad you're having fun. :) |
| from horseshoes : |
| username:horse password: shoes |
| from goingloopy : |
| I'm not going to tell you to be happy...because I'm sure if there were the magic happy wand we would all have discovered it by now, right? I will say, though, that I hope things get better for you soon. |
| from stillsingle : |
| That sucks girl. I feel for ya! The first guy I lived with was like that...in a terrible financial situation and that never made matters in our relationship easy. I learned my lesson after him! I think they say 90% of all divorces are over money...sad isn't it? Maybe with a little coaching/help from you he'll get back on track. Or do what my brother did with his girlfriend...have Jeremy turn ALL of his finances over to you; every paycheck (once he does get a job), every bill, etc. and just give him an allowance for gas/food, etc. and see how he does with that. Start small until he learns the value of a dollar. Good luck, hon! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| this is way above my head and all i can say is this truly sucks and i hope you find peace soon. (in not the morbid way! knock on wood). goddamnit. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Fights about money are usually a symptom of something deeper. Being a fairly regular reader, the impression I get is that you, at some level, do not trust Jeremy to take care of you...or to at least be an equal partner in the relationship. I believe that you care about him, and I belive that he cares about you. I also believe that you see your friends getting married and buying houses and looking all cute in the bargain, and you think that this makes you completely deficient. First: you're not. Your life is your life, and there could be a lot of aspects of theirs you are not seeing. Second: five years from now, they could be struggling to pay all the bills for all the stuff they just HAD to have, file bankruptcy, get divorced, stress eat, whatever. I think the important thing for YOU is to figure out if you can ever trust that Jeremy will be an equal partner, and if so, accept that this may be the time where he leans on you, and there may be a time five years from now where the situation is reversed. However, if you are continuing to have these feelings like he's NOT your equal, then you need to let it go. I know you want to be married and settled and start a family, but you are only 25 (26?) and you have at least a good 15 years left to have kids. You have time to make sure that you are picking the right person to share that incredible responsibility. Jeremy may be it, or he may have come into your life so you can revise your definition of Mr. Right. The hardest thing about all of this is that you will have to really learn to trust YOURSELF and your own instincts to tell you what to do. The good news is, you are intelligent enough to make this happen. |
| from makinganewme : |
| I see where you are getting frustrated with the situation. The saying money makes the world go round, is totally true. I don't want you to be mad at me but, do you have enough money to be taken care of? What I mean is, are you doing without anything? What if the roles were reversed? It sounds like Jeremy has himself in a pretty tight situation--does that bother you because you feel taken advantage of? Or because you are doing without frivilous things because of him? Or what? We never have a lot of money, and I start having all these things I want and they seem so unattainable and it makes me sad. Then I sit down and think--I have somewhere to live. I have clothes--sure they may not be the most stylish ones or expensive ones but they are still clothes. I have enough to eat. I don't know if your religious or not but I have an uncle that is. One time after I wrote something about never having enough money he wrote this to me. "Something has stuck in my head and I think that we all could use a second to think about what really is important. When you work what is the purpose of that work? Is it for your own personal gain or is it for the greater good? If you work to purchase more things or better things then you are working for the wrong purpose. You are letting money rule you, in a sense your new God has become money." It sounds really preachy but it's so true. I think that if you feel taken advantage of though, that maybe you and Jeremy need to have a talk. I think that you are putting in more of your share and maybe he needs to know that it makes you feel the way it does. I hope that you don't think I'm being mean. When I re-read what I've wrote above it sounds like I'm taking Jeremy's side. I'm not though. I'm 100% behind you--I think that if you feel like the money is a big problem then it definetly is and needs to be fixed somehow. Take care!!! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Sorry to hear about your fights with Jeremy. I know that it's extremely hard not to be resentful, especially when it comes to money. It sounds like your money is going towards helping him catch up on HIS bills and I would be pretty bent out of shape that I had to go without things to help him out, especially if I wasn't on my way to get married yet! However, with that said, I was in a poor financial condition (not as bad as Jeremy's) and Dan helped me get on my feet. I was spending more on frivilous things than making sure my bills were paid. So, Dan helped me put my spending in check and get my bills paid. I make enough to cover my bills so I'm sure that was a relief to Dan. I guess I would wait it out and see if Jeremy gets on the ball to find a job, if he seems like he's stalling or not moving that quickly I would probably have words with him. I totally agree with you on this situation and would be getting impatient about getting married and starting a family too! Good luck! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I hear you on the pity party..I feel the same way. It seems like all my friends are buying houses now and have all this money put away in savings! It's frustrating..I know what you mean about living paycheck to paycheck. I hate it too. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Doesn't it suck to feel that way? All my friends are rich and thin and in love and then there's me. Of course I have things that they don't as well and in the end, I'd always rather be me so I'm sure you feel the same way. And I would hate having to apy for all Jeremy's crap. I'm sure your brother is like why the fuck are you with him? And how is he ever going to get your ring at this poitn? And what did he do before you? He needs a job ASAP> |
| from goingloopy : |
| I liked the second dress. Defines the waist more...the top one looks like a maternity dress. But that could just be on me own body, which has no boobs and no waist...sigh. A shrug would be okay, but should be a lighter color with short sleeves (they had some at Old Navy, maybe.) Also, check out Lane Bryant's website...they have a dress similar to those but with some fluttery sleeves. I'm so with you on the arm thing, sister. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I saw the Manning brothers, that was exciting for me. I saw Carson from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy and a bunch mroe B list celebs. No big names,it was a little disappointing. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Just catching up on my reading, it's been soooo long! Sorry to hear about your "troubles" with Jeremy again (computer porn, etc.). Every guy does it, some are just better at hiding it (tell Jeremy to learn how). By the way...you need to delete your temporary internet files, your history and your cookies to completely clean your computer of any internet history...go to your internet options in the control panel to do this. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Just catching up on my reading, it's been soooo long! Sorry to hear about your "troubles" with Jeremy again (computer porn, etc.). Every guy does it, some are just better at hiding it (tell Jeremy to learn how). By the way...you need to delete your temporary internet files, your history and your cookies to completely clean your computer of any internet history...go to your internet options in the control panel to do this. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I love the second dress, i think you would look amazing in it!!:) Go for it girl!!!! Love ya! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| I like the second dress (the blue one), but both are really cute. At least you only have to meet the ex-girlfriend...I live across the hall from jason's EX. If she's there, just think how lucky you are cause you have the man :) |
| from annalyn18 : |
| by the way...I love the first dress. |
| from annalyn18 : |
| Hey, girl. I thank you for your thoughts. I hope I didn't upset you, but I like your honesty. I am the type of person who says what I think, and sometimes I stick my foot in my mouth, but that is just me. I understand from your point of view of being hurt and having insercurities and all. But, why rush getting engaged and then married? Why not take your time, and keep learning from one another? I only say this, because you stress a lot about these issues in your diary. Sweetie, I am not sure I should be offering my advice, since I don't know you or Jeremy, but sometimes I just like to speak my mind. Forgive me, if I touch any nerves. I am here to support you, not bring you down. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I can relate to your feelings regarding Jeremy, I have similiar ones with Eric. I express them in my journal because this is also my inner voice, the place where I share the things that most people that meet me on the street will never ever know or see. The place where I air my insecurities and vent about the things that upset me. Even though deep inside I trust Eric entirely, just like you with Jeremy. sometimes you really can't help the way you feel. It's natural. :). All those outfits are beautiful btw. Have a nice night! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| The first dress will look better with the shrug. Hunterpoo did my template. I don't know if you like it but I LOVE it. I wish I could do one for you but I too and computer illiterate. |
| from beckers-j : |
| The dresses are great. I actually prefer the second one, but does it come in a different color? Or maybe the shrug comes in a different color? I'm not just being a pain in the ass - I'm overly conscious about not wearing black and blue together. :) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i absolutely love the second dress. absolutely love it :) good taste, lovely. it's nice that you're clarifying things but the weird thing is that i already know you ultimately trust jeremy.. i think it's because i'm the same way. in the end, i trust him. i trust doug that he lvoes me and i trust that he won't cheat.. but sometimes he lies about SILLY things and it makes me question everything. boys! here's to great sex tonight. |
| from summerroll : |
| Great dresses! I'm going shopping this afternoon for a dress for my friend's wedding. I love the first one, but it's for us flat chested girls. The second one would look better on someone with actual cleavage. Don't worrry about the insecurities. We all have them. At least you know that most of them are in your head; that's the hardest part to get over, so you're half way there. |
| from annalyn18 : |
| hey girl, just a thought from the outside, looking in. why do you want to marry someone who might not trust? I have read your diary from the beginning, and this is the only thing that bothers me. I have been in a relationship for 5 years, and I truly love my man. I know that he is gonna look at other women, regardless if it is on the street or on the computer or in bar. That is what men do. You have to love yourself, and be confident in yourself, that way you won't mind if your man looks at another woman. You know what you got, and if you don't grasp it for all that it is, then you are gonna lose it. You do not want to get married for a learning expierence, you want to get married, because you want to live every day and night with Jeremy, in a happy and healthy home. Learn to trust him, or move on. and when it comes to how you look, You are a very pretty woman, with nice curves. Only you can change the size of which you are. No one but you. I am only being honest with you, because I can. I don't know you, so nothing I say is personal. If we did know eachother in the real world, I think you would be awesome to know and be friends with. I am only trying to help you see your situation from the outsiders world. I only want the best for you and Jeremy. Keep your head up, and realize your dreams. |
| from clarity25 : |
| You're beautiful, don't let him looking at porn make you feel insecure about yourself and your body. Most guys DO look at porn..(haha..I AM learning this and coming to terms with this information as well..) and it doesn't mean he's not happy with you. It's easier to say "don't feel insecure" and harder to actually change the way you feel inside. Believe me I know. Although I must confess..the fact that you searched for your own porn and left the history up for him to find was pretty clever and funny. You have to tell us how he responds when you turn it around on him:) |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Hey girlie. I think that you're very pretty, and NO I'm not just saying that. Jeremy is a good looking guy, and I think that he genuinly likes you for you. From what I read about the two of you~~ He is head over heals in love with you:) So , don't worry about what he lookes at. I know it's easier said than done, but just try to know that all guys will at some point in time look at porn. I know how mad it makes us feel, but I guess that's just how life is. I wish that he would change for you though! Thanks for the birthday wishes also:) Havea great day! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Girl... I understand exactly where you're coming from! Excessive weight makes me so insecure sometimes that I hardly recognize myself. We just have to remember that we are truely beautiful people no matter what size we are. I don't think Jeremy would be with you if he didn't think so. As for him looking at pics of women with hot bodies... I think that is just a criteria to be a man. Many men do that and it's not because they WISH they could be with them, I think men just like to look at women, period. You are a beautiful person... please remember that! As for your secret, hope everything is ok! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| oddly enough, even if it's not a weight problem, i feel you. my boobs.. my back.. my zebra butt (i have a very tan butt and very white stretch marks). I think, no one will ever be happy with who they are unless they change their mindset and focus on what they do have instead of what they don't have. why do you think i'm so jealous? |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I think you are beautiful no matter what insecurities you have with your body. you should just accept whop you are and be the confident woman i know you are dying to be! LOVE YA!!! p.s.whats the secret? |
| from goingloopy : |
| Sigh. 28 sounds so YOUNG (I'll be 31 next week. Writing that was painful.) Ocean's 12 was lame, but Spanglish is pretty good if you haven't seen that...and I agree that no way should he show you the ring. It would be different if he hadn't made a big deal about picking it out. I am glad he's done with school, though. :) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| the bit about jermey showing you the ring and your abrupt, "No" was fantastic. I love your humor. Congrats on Jermey graduating! Sigh. 28 sounds so far off. I'm only approaching 22. I hope I'm as levelheaded and smart as you at 28. Here's hoping. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| 1. a coworker 2. your lil black dress (if you have one) if not..an outfit you like. 3. something hanging on your wall |
| from ventichai : |
| this is me! |
| from clarity25 : |
| Happy 2 year D-land Anniversary:), it's weird when you look back isn't it?..seeing how far you've come and how you've changed? It's great to have a record of your life to look back on in the future. As for Pic requests, I'd like to see your favorite picture with you and your cute man, Your bathroom (hehe) and the view from your bedroom window..oh and the computer you write from:). Oh and I love girls nights together watching T.V. shows..for me it was also 90210 and Party of Five with friends, in addition to my So-Called-life and Felicity. Now it's Sex and the city marathons and O.C., it's just not as much fun without your friends! P.S. Masturbation cures cramps?!, thanks for the heads up! (have to try that) Have a great weekend! |
| from aidawrites : |
| Happy Dland Anniversary! (im sure i spelled that wrong) |
| from makinganewme : |
| yay! I'd like to see #1)what, if anything, is hanging from your rear-view mirror. #2) The contents of your purse (and no cleaning it out first, missy!) and #3) Something that makes you happy everytime you look at it. |
| from beckers-j : |
| Thanks for the password! |
| from goingloopy : |
| Mind-blowing, for sure. And it IS hard when you're out of school and working and dating someone who ISN'T. Hopefully you can get it worked out...which you will, if he's busting his ass like that. Sooner or later, it will pay off. You do, however, have the right idea about the separate accounts. Hang in there, girlie. :) |
| from beckers-j : |
| Hey, thanks for adding me to your list. :) Maybe I can get a password to check your diary out? My firewall e-mail is [email protected]. |
| from spoildangelz : |
| Hey - thanks so much for the note. Cadence is definitely doing much better. I've been meaning to ask you to send me an e-mail with your username and password! I could've sworn you sent it to me already, but I can't seem to find the e-mail!!! Help! :-) |
| from princesstosh : |
| I say mind blowing. It leaves you lingering and thinking about it all week. Glad you're feeling semi-better. Financial worries are usually my major concern, too. It's easy to drown in debt but I think in other ways you are very rich--you have Jeremy, a good job, a loving family--those are the things that really make you wealthy, it's just hard to remember that sometimes |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| my ideal ideal ideal..is twice a day.. with a break on one or two days.. meaning.. 10-12 times a week. and at least 4 of those has to be mind blowing. |
| from aidawrites : |
| Sounds like you are having a rough few days. And nag all you want about it, its your diary! I know about money issues, I think we've all been there at some point or another and it seems like everything revolves around it. I had a boyfriend like Jeremy too. He didnt work much and he didnt mind that I paid for everything, and yes i did grow to resent it to the point where I had to have a talk with him and told him if he didnt grow up i couldnt stick around to be his mom. lol. it actually worked. anyway, Algebra is hard! I passed it in high school and college, but i do remember it being hard. Anyway, hope things get brighter for you this week :) |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry to hear about your $$ frustrations. Have you thought about getting a new job, or asking Jeremy to get something part-time? Money and school only add stress to relationships; been there, done that, and it sucks. I feel for ya. Hang in there! |
| from cest-sa-vie : |
| Password please? [email protected] |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i totally understand. money is a top problem in relationships. i used to resent the hell out of doug one chapter of our relationship where i paid for EVERYTHING. it made me resent him so much... oh liz, sometimes i wish we could meet up during the weekends and detox and just. cuddle. haha okay maybe not CUDDLE cuddle. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| There is no way I could date anyone for any given amount of time and pay for everything. I would go berserk so I think that what you are feeling is totally normal. And it's not just the paying for it right now, it's the fact that he can't even pass algebra. Come on. And why is he taking algebra if he's going to be a massage therapist? Does he ever show any iniative at all? I would be losing it if I were you too though. And your apartment sounds cute. I wish I could find a place with all that. |
| from jess1976 : |
| I would be totally irritated if I were you. My boyfriend is totally opposite. He works so much that he's never home and he's constantly worrying about money. I think it's probably because we are paying for a wedding. Which brings me to another point, you would think since Jeremy is buying a ring that he would think about the other things you might have to pay for and maybe want to consider getting a job. I am with you... I would be totally embarrased if I was a guy and my gf supported me. I know you love him and I'm sure this will all work out but before you decide to 100% commit to him, you should make sure that this is just a fluke and that he will be hard working, b/c it will be a tough road to lead, if you have to support him your whole life. I hope this doesn't make you mad or upset with me. I've always been one to tell it like it is... hopefully I don't offend you. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| omg I am going through the same thing with moeny & jason right now too! he has no job & hasn't since october. now he's out of money, and i mean OUT as in $0.55 in his account. so instead of getting his ass a job, he's probably going to end up living with me. and to top things off yesterday he asked if WE had enough money to be looking at a pair of flip-flops at Target! It's MY money, I worked hard all day & I can't get a $9 pair of flip-flops?? Arggggg... |
| from lonelylatina : |
| it's unlocked :) |
| from geekgurrll : |
| Hi - would it be possible to get the username/password to your diary? I've seen your diary listed on a couple of other ones I read & am keen to check out yours as well. My email is [email protected] Thanks! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i'd be wary of her too. the thing is, you may pick up o this and all the other girls would too but guys are so oblivious. |
| from goingloopy : |
| She sounds like poison. Perhaps you should tattoo a skull and crossbones on her forehead. I know what you mean about the "fat one has a b/f" jealousy, too...it was only recently that I ran into this, because I'm usually the single one, but seriously, people who are insecure (and the people who act like your "friend" are) usually don't have happy relationships. Good luck. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I hate change too. Blech. It doesn't sound like her coming home is going to do anyone any good. |
| from aidawrites : |
| I |
| from aidawrites : |
| think you are very VERY lucky to have someone love you and that you love them just the same. That is the most important thing to have, money doesnt really even come close to it. Everything else always works itself out somehow anyway. And you can make calzones? Ive always wondered how those are made, i love them more than anything! I could eat them everyday :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| What a great outlook about the money situation. IT sounds like Jeremy will be making good money soon. I don't really get the thrill of Nascar either but it's good if you are hungover because you can watch the beginning, sleep for hours and still wake up before the end. I"m going to the Bristol race in August, I"ll let you know if I find anything appealing about Nascar. |
| from clarity25 : |
| Glad you and Jeremy made up, Eric and I have had nights like that. I'm so irrational after a few drinks and sometimes the dirty laundry comes out. Oh and I can relate to your "poor and happy" entry. I'm on the same boat. you realize money isn't really what matters and Pb & J sandwiches ARE good. P.S. by the way, you're prettier than Summer. psht. |
| from aidawrites : |
| I appreciate your advice, it did make me look at it a little differently because you are right, you cant really change someone and if you do they might resent you at some point. I will admit that it is a bad habit of me when I have a bf to always pick his clothes and things like that because I feel like if I mold them im doing them a favor when in fact its actually quite selfish of me. Thanks for your words of wisdom, I tend to be superficial at times and I need people to ground me :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the note. I sometimes wish I could get inside his mind as well but then I wonder if we would ever truly want to see all the things that other people felt about us. I know that a lot of couples are rocky at the beginning, maybe its' the transitioning of us from being merely phone friends to being more or maybe he just realized he doesn't have time for a relationship or that he doesn't like me.I'd like to know but I can't make him tell me and I can't make him change. It's sad. But you are right, Griffin and I deserve better so we shall have better!! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| i definitley understand your trust issues with jeremey. the first 2 months of dating jason he was also lying to me. i still feel just like you, i don't think he's lying but i still feel like i didn't know before so i need to see if he is. i'm really working on this, and tyring not to go through his email or his phone but its hard. i think though, they need to show us they can be trusted becaus even the little lies bother me and i'm much less mad about ANYTHING than if he lied to me about it. clarity has left me some nice notes about this same issue and she has a much better way to say it. hope you had a nice quiet nite :) |
| from aidawrites : |
| sorry to hear you are hungover, hopefully you can rest tonight. wine will do that to you, next time take lots of water and a few advils before you go to bed. anyway, its hard to trust someone after you have caught them lying. Jeremy has to understand its a process and its not going to happen over night. Hope you feel better and have a great weekend! I dont think Summer is that pretty, its mostly the make up I think. |
| from princesstosh : |
| I've been thinking about it for a while and I've come the conclusion that lying is tricky. Some lies are one or two-time mistakes. Other lies are stair steps. You tell one on top of the other on top of the other. See what I'm at? I think that to get to the inside of lies, you have to look at who's doing the lying. If you think Jeremy would never cheat, then he's probably not one of those evil liars. Him and Michael are probably alike--they lie and then they think to themselves, why did I lie? Then rather than fess up they let it just sit and then one day it comes out. Anyway what I'm getting at is I dont think that Jeremy's lies are life changing. It was wrong of him to do, and it will take a while for you to trust him again but hopefully he knows and accepts that. Surely he wont get rid of your beautiful ring! And you're right about it---it's not the jewelry itself but the love that it symbolizes. Everything will be okay--just no more wine! ;) |
| from jess1976 : |
| Glad to hear things are back to normal with you and Jeremy. What you did last night might not seem like the best idea right now, but maybe it will benefit your relationship. Maybe he'll realize that he needs to be more trustworthy and you'll realize you need to be more trusting. It's tough to be trusting though... I swear it's some weird gene that most women have where we are programmed to not trust men and therefore we must question them and snoop... it's like a sickness. I've been there before! Hope you get some sleep and feel better tomorrow. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I think we all want to look like Summer. She's so tiny!! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Oh most definitely getting married next may, so many things to do!!! :) thanks girl!!! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Great pics! Your grandmother is beautiful! It seems they all were back then, doesn't it? Your curly hair seems more tamed than my does. How did you get your bangs so straight? |
| from aidawrites : |
| great pics! your grandparents were gorgeous! Your grandfather looks like Ryan Gosling (from The Notebook) Your pics were great too, i love curly hair, I used to perm mine back when it was popular. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| beautiful photos. your grandomther was a looker! i see her in you! what a sweet dog. i have choppy thoughts because im suppose to be studying. |
| from princesstosh : |
| I'm sorry but I hate people who say something and then turn around and say "But I dont mean you" it drives me nuts. I've been in denial about my weight for a long time now. I get motivated, and do good for a week or two and then I just go back to my old ways. I mean we all know what the key is- eat less, exercise more. I dont know why it's so hard to do but it is. No one has ever referenced my weight that I can remember in a way that it hurt my feelings until yesterday. And of all people, it was Michael. I dont think he meant it in a mean way but---well heres the story. My friend C ran over a bird a while back and to make her feel better, we said the bird must have been suicidal. (This is a really weird story, by the way) Well, once when I was in High school and I was walking out to my car, this girl backed into me. I mean literally hit me with her car. So I was like "But that doesnt mean I'm suicidal because Q hit me" and then Michael goes "Her car must have been sucidial" Referencing to me being fat and damaging her car (WHICH I DIDNT, for the record lol) And I know it was meant to be funny but at the same time I was hurt. The short way to say everything I just did was I know how you feel :( |
| from jess1976 : |
| I totally understand the weight thing... my mom knows I'm doing WW and that I've lost 12 pounds, but just yesterday she told me that I need to start losing weight. Uh yea, figured that out, but could you tell my body to hurry it up since it's not losing it fast enough for your liking. I swear sometimes I could strangle her. It's easy to fall off the wagon, but as my future mother in law says, it's ok to fall off as long as you never quit trying. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Why does your health insurance need your height and weight? I've carried it on my own since I was 18 and I've never been asked about that. Sounds a little fishy. |
| from princesstosh : |
| Those are my morning shows too. I can barely make myself get dressed because I LOVE the Golden Girls (and by now every episode I see is a repeat, so I dont know why I get so excited over them) Your weekend sounds fabulous! Have fun! |
| from horseshoes : |
| I'm so jealous! I love Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. Free falling is my favorite. Have a good time! |
| from princesstosh : |
| I cant wait to see the curly hair! |
| from aidawrites : |
| If you are a romantic the movie isnt going to change that. Its a great film because of the dialogue. It really gives you goosepumps the way they express their feelings. amazing stuff! plus how hot are Clive Owen and Jude Law?! Have a fabulous weekend! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather, that's really sad. As for the motherhood thing, I think that it's kind of the same thing as living with someone. You love Jeremy but you at times just want to be alone, be selfish and not worry about him. I get that. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I'm so sorry for what your grandpa is going through. I can't imagine what it's like on your mom and your family. My prayers are with you. You definitely need to get to the dr on that one. A friend of mine, after having that same thing happen (had a piece of her cervix removed), found out she had cancer on one of her ovaries and had to have it removed. As for curly hair...I hear ya! I have naturally curly hair as well. I just put some spray gel on it and away I go! And we have the option of also going straight when we want, too, which is nice! Curly haired girls rule! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I hated not having insurance. IT seems like you always need it when you don't ahve it, doesn't it? Oh well. I'm glad you don't have HPV, I have heard of it and it's terrible. |
| from kris-tee : |
| user name kristy password blake1717, email me yours, [email protected] |
| from bethany9 : |
| i agree. damn double standards! |
| from betchy : |
| hey you, thanks for the questions, they were great!!! and they are all up and answered! also, i dont know where i put your password and stuff, so if you could give them to me again tht would be brill!! thanks again for the comment x |
| from makinganewme : |
| Hey girl,thanks for the note!! I guess we are exactly alike as far as trust issues go. I've worked so hard to maintain that I give my real self to him, and all of my honesty. To know he hadnt given back 100% really stung. I guess it will take a while for me to get that trust back. Thanks for the support!! I'm so glad things worked out with transporting your grandfather! I'll keep you, him and your family in my prayers! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I love sports because of the camaradirie (spelling?). We used to have season tickets to the Tennessee Titan games in Nashville. Well they used to play scenes from the movie, Remember the Titans, at those games and it gave me chills too. Although the chills could be because it was always freezing but at the same time it just felt like we were all momentarily bonded, ya know? It's the same way with UT football. I watch UK basketball with my sister and its' still fun. Everyone wearing the same colors and drinking and cheering and getting excited!! I love sports! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Wouldn't it be nice if we were all just a size 4 and could eat whatever we wanted and never worry about it? At least you can be honest with Jeremy about your worries. I would never have bene able to tell someone that. I'm not very open about my insecurities. As for your job, at least you get 2 weeks. I get none. Well I did get paid for one week between Christmas and New Year's but that was it and I didn't get to pick that. I don't know. I hate looking for jobs too but it might have come down to that. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Awwww, Jeremy is such a sweetheart! Isn't it funny how guys can say something really stupid and then turn around and say something so endearing all in the same breath? |
| from soverycherry : |
| "There are more important things in life than my ass." Ha! Love it. Also, so glad your grandpa gets to be near the rest of the family, that's great. I hope you have fun at the game! |
| from classygirl83 : |
| Hey, can I PLEASE have your password, I used to read you like all the tiem, my name is girlygirl83, but then it changed to classygirl83, I really miss reading you. I hope that all is well with you and Jeremy. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Username is stillsingle; password is sunshine. :) |
| from stillsingle : |
| It's funny how when you talk about the weather it's always a day behind me. The past 2 days here were 70 and sunny; today is 45 and rainy. I guess it's supposed to clear up and be sunny and highs in the 60's this weekend for us! Glad you had fun in Chicago! |
| from goingloopy : |
| Hugs to you & the family, and prayers for your grampa. And I'm sorry that Jeremy couldn't get the ring, but you're right...things do happen for a reason, and as long as your head and heart are in the right place, stuff is just stuff. Have an AWESOME trip. Check out the Lincoln Park area...all sorts of cool stores with hippie stuff. :) |
| from stillsingle : |
| Have a great time in Chicago, and Happy Easter! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| hello dear. i'm sorry to hear your grandfather is ill. i'm hoping and praying. |
| from aidawrites : |
| Sorry to hear your grandpa isnt well. You will be in my prayers tonight. Hope things get better soon. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry to hear about your grandpa. I know I hated that I wasn't there when my grandma died and then she was cremated, so I didn't see her at all before she died. But the last time I did see her she was really happy and that's how I'll always remember her...not shriveled up in some hospital bed. By the way, very cute layout...sunflowers are my favorite! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather. I'm at a loss for the right words. I'll be praying for him and you're in my thoughts. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| Oh I'm so sorry to hear about your grandpa. I will be praying for you & your family and I hope that everything is ok. I know how hard it is to face the thought of your grandpa & you've been so supportive of me when I was dealing with the same thing. I say if you feel you need to be there with him than do it, everything else will still be there when you get back. Take care. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm so sorry to hear about your grandpa. You are all in my thoughts and prayers! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh my gosh, too funny. That is exactly what I should say "Hmmm...Tiffany you do realize I've basically already paid for your vacation seeing as your government assistance comes out of my check and hmmm yuaeh I pay taxes too so SHUT THE FUCK UP!!" I hate her. I am going to pray really hard to find a better place for Griffin. The other parents say tha they aren't going to pay it either. I just don't want to be the first one to say it. Oh well, pray for us. As for Brandon, I don't get it. I am so hurt. I guess I was too optimistic for my own good. The worst part is really missing someone and feeling as if tey haven't missed you at all. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh and I think that the main reason he even brings it up is to let me know that other girls think he's attractive. It's a total insecurity move. I've put an end to it though, hoepfully. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| We had a lovely time, I should have known that we would. It seems so silly to be nervous when it's all said and done. As for Ashley Judd, I know that she is indeed married and that for the most part she lives in Italy with Fabrizio or whatever his name is but she also has a home in Franklin, KY which is close to us and she's always in KY for UK games. She's a huge fan. I don't know that they'll ever see each other again but rumors are that she and her husband are separated and she'll be returning to the states for good soon. Great. Why would she even want to call Brandon? Why not call Josh Hartnett or Paul Walker if she is looking for a younger man? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Ah, that is so sad. I hope he gets the loan. I know how excited you are about getting engaged. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the positivity. I really need it. I feel like the whole night is falling apart right in front of me. |
| from aidawrites : |
| Thats wild about Chris (Adrian)! Have a great St.Patty's! And damn girl, you sure waited a long time to loose your Virginity. Actually, i think its great to wait, i waited too, and i dont regret it, while others who lost it in high school do regret it because it was usually sloppy kid sex. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| No it's not weird that you are looking forward to going out and drinking tonight. It's St. Patrick's Day, that is what today was made for. As for the whole talking to your first, that is so strange. It kind of does seem like fate. Oh well. Sometimes I guess fate has lousy timing. I see my first all the time at Bailey's, he's a 26 year old bartender. Awesome. |
| from goingloopy : |
| (1) I like the growing out the hair thing...it looks good. But dear god, that's the most frustrating thing ever. That's why I never cut mine anymore. (2) You can tell you've lost weight in those pictures...go girl!! (3) I'm sorry your mom is being psycho. (4) You don't have to call them if you don't want to. I wouldn't either. If they're "family", they should love you no matter what, not criticize endlessly. |
| from princesstosh : |
| Nope, it's not sad. Drinking and going out is one of those things you have to "feel". I'm going out tonight too, for ladies night, and a friends birthday. I'll have one for you!! I'll keep my fingers crossed on the hookup from Ron ;) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| hey babe. maybe i have a horrible memory if you already explained this. but what happened to florida? and yeah, maybe growing your hair out may work. i know i won't ever wear a low cut evening dress. that's my limit. really pushing it. which makes me sad. maybe i can J.Lo it to make up for it. haha |
| from bethany9 : |
| If you have any questions about where to go in Chicago, ask me. I know of all sorts of fun stuff. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I don't think I'd want to know when I'd be getting proposed to either, doesn't it take the fun and surprise out of it if you know? I want to be totally shocked and surprised when/if it does happen, I want it to knock me off my feet. I'm sure Jeremy will think of someway to throw you off, even though you kind of know, he'll do something to surprise you! That party idea would be so cool. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Good, I'm glad I didn't upset you. I have a tendency to just say what I think without really thinking about it. I'm right there with you, I have forty pounds I want to lose. I'd be crushed if someone said something about my weight. It's a personal thing, ya know? It's like I know I want to lose weight but I don't need anyone else to comment on it or remind me!! And you are doing great!! You'll be thin in no time and then you can tell them to kiss your skinny little ass! Can't wait for the entry. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I would avoid them, too, and I can't believe your mom would take sides with them and not defend her own daughter. You have made a HUGE improvement on your weight, you should be proud of yourself for sticking to your diet and exercise; I wish I could say the same for me! I envy your willpower and determination. Just write them a letter and say "if you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all"...little golden rule I learned from my grandma and my mom over the years. It also tends to shut most people up. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I didn't mean to make you mad. I was just voicing my opinion. Personally I never make fun of fat people. I just think that alcoholism is seen as a disease and people are born with their nose or bad skin or whatever else makes them ugly. Weight is something that people have control over for the most part. I don't think that you are fat. I would never say it about you. I'm just letting you know why I think that people feel it's okay to say things about it. My best friend is VERY overweight and I've been there for her more than once when people have made comments. But what it comes down to is that people assume that fat people are lazy which may or may not be true. Just let your "aunts" know that you are happy. Or do you think it bothers you so much because you aren't happy with the way you look? I don't know. I just know I didn't mean to make you mad! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| GIRL.....I hung out with someone that could have been you last night, I had the best time wiht this girl, who reminded me of how you are (personality wise and what not, and kinda even looks dude!!!) TOTALLY.. i was like "ITS LIZ!!!" LOVE YA!!!!!!!!! Just thought i would tell you.. i was going to write an entry about how much fun i had with this girl and how much she reminded me of you!! Maybe i will.... dedicated to you :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I guess people think that you can do something about being fat whereas there is nothing you can do about being ugly. It's still rude though. And you've lost tons of weight, haven't you? Just tell them that you are happy the way you are and that they shouldn't worry about it. |
| from bethany9 : |
| password please! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the compliments on Griffin. I definately agree!! AS for meeting Brandon, I haven't talked to him today so I don't know what is going on. It snowed this morning so he might have had to go to the slopes. I don't know. I'm glad that you felt the same way though. It makes me feel more sane, that's for sure. I am just so afraid that it won't be what I want it to be. However I've been disappointed before so I can live through it, right? Also I like the tattoos. I am personally not a big fan of body art but I like it a lot better when it has meaning and that definately does. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I liked that tattoo design, I think that's a great idea and romantic.. I also loved the pics. You're really beautiful:), hope you're having a good night! |
| from aidawrites : |
| love the pics, you are totally hot! great smile ;) and you both look oh so cute in your costumes. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Love pictures, so cute! Chris and I don't even have any of us together yet, but as soon as I do, I will post them. Thanks for posting! |
| from jess1976 : |
| LOVE LOVE LOVE the photos! you guys look so cute together and you are totally hotter than your friend :) Congrats on your WW loss... I hope to have the same loss this week as well, I weigh in on Wednesdays. I've worked out 3 days since Thursday and that's an accomplishment because I never work out. Anyhow, glad to hear everything is going well! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Pictures are cute. You have some really pretty friends, thanks for sharing them. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| thanks for sharing the lovely fun photos! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| awwww...that picture of you & jermey in chicago is so CUTE. reminds i really need to get a picture of me & jason, we've been together 2 1/2 years & still don't have a single picture of us together. and girl, don't be so hard on yourself all the time, i'm a skinny girl & i have a double chin too. :P |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| We are leaving out of Ft. Lauderdale, the fare was cheap and included in teh cruise price for a grand total of 1000 each.. yes that is a lot of money but for a 7 night cruise, not at all! we just need to bring spedning money and alcohol money... :) How funny (or cool) would it be if we were in Chicago at the same time.... HI LIZ!! HI JENN.. that would be fun to meet ya! i am going on teh 18th-20th, we are staying that sunday to check out the city.. since weve never been there! HOLLA! :) Have a great weekend.... i miss your entries girl! |
| from clarity25 : |
| First of all I'm sorry to hear about his grandfather's funeral, that's so difficult. I'm also sorry about the stress you're dealing with concerning his family. I can understand the emotions you're expressing and how you feel. It's hard because you don't want to be judgmental and on the other hand, it is just such a different life his family leads. It's hard to grasp and accept. I wouldn't know what to do either, to be honest, I would feel similiar..Maybe eloping WOULD be the best solution..so you don't have to invite the people you don't want to invite without offending them..and you don't have to worry about your family and their response to HIS family. It seems like a mess..good luck with however you choose to handle it. I believe in the end that it WILL all work out. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I don't know how you're going to do it, girl, but I know if it was me, I'd elope and forget about all the presents and parties, espeically with such dramatic differences between the two families...it's about being married to him, and sharing your life together, not all the glits that comes along with a wedding. Concentrate on the marriage, not the wedding itself. |
| from jemimap : |
| My email is supersa100 @hotmail,com. Looking forward to catching up on the happenings in your life! :) |
| from goingloopy : |
| It's not wrong to want those things...I want those things. I just don't want to have to get married to have them...hehehe. You could have a very small (immediate family only) wedding, and just invite his parents; or have the wedding somewhere that there's no way in hell they could afford to show up and just buy his parents plane tickets...or elope & have a reception for family & friends, and conveniently forget to tell his family...or elope & send out announcements. Announcements will signal that gifts are appropriate. ;) Good luck, chickie. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| perhaps he started calling his own family trashy because he was feeling evenmore self conscious about them since you were there? just throwing this out there, but maybe he's trying to beat you to the punch. my brother often calls himself fat and makes it a joke, but he's only doing so because if he says it first, no one else can... i know i could be totally wrong so dont take anythign i say seriously since i have no idea.. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sounds like you guys better get on a flight to Vegas and elope! It's always interesting meeting the family. I just hope Chris's family isn't insane or anything! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| OH MY GOD... its almost like an entry out of a movie or a book or Jerry Springer. DAMN GIRL!! ya, that is craziness.. you know your a redneck when.. HA!@ :P) i love it! (any snow in your area today? i have a delayed opening YIPPPEEE!!) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| That sounds terrible. I don't know how you will have a wedding either. I'd elope. Good luck with that one. |
| from princesstosh : |
| I'm sorry to hear about his g-pa. Funerals are tough, and I'm glad you got through it (pretty) easily. I cant imagine how akward it was for you. I have a question. How does Jeremy feel about his family being at the wedding? Is he indifferent about it? Michaels family sounds a lot like Jeremys in the fact that sometimes they are embarassing to be around. Nonetheless, it meant so much to Michael to have his family there so I found a way to turn the other cheek about their behavior. None of them shamed him, or embarassed either one of us, either. I know that you think it will be difficult but keep in consideration what he wants. I put my differences aside for our wedding, for the man that I love, and I bet that you could do the same if it meant anything to him. If not, then find an awesome place to elope!!!! Good luck! |
| from third-person : |
| Can I pretty please have your password? My e-mail is [email protected]. :) |
| from clarity25 : |
| Thank you for your thoughts and prayers:). I'm sorry you had to lock up, I meant to ask you this before when you first announced it. But it's been a rough week for me. So I wasn't online much. could you share the password with me? My E-mail is [email protected]. Thanks:) |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry to hear about Jeremy's grandpa. It must be awkward going to a funeral for someone you didn't know, but you're there to support him and that's all. Maybe the drive will be nice, and getting out of town is always good, too. |
| from horseshoes : |
| I don't understand the whle "no suit" issue. How strange. My family and myself are pretty redneck, no denying it. But we all wear suits and dresses when it's necessary. At the VERY least slacks and nice dress clothes. That doesn't seeem as redneck as just plain disrespectfull. Especially with your wedding. Gah, I can't beleive they wouldn't dress up even if you bought or rented them the clothes. I would think if they had a clue they would be embarrased if everyone else in the wedding looked the same. I feel for you. Maybe I'm a classier redneck, heh. |
| from goingloopy : |
| I don't blame you for smoking. Or eating. There's only so much stress you can be expected to deal with vice-free, girlie. And I hear ya on the clothing problem...I have to go to a wedding this weekend, and I have nothing wedding-y that fits. |
| from mplsgirl : |
| could you send me your password? [email protected] |
| from gumphood : |
| gumphoodATgmailDOTcom |
| from goingloopy : |
| I'm glad you got the guestbook comments...that's hilarious. And figuring out links and all that crap is kinda scary, and sometimes involves editing the same entry 70 gabillion times, but it's cool when you figure it out...very satisfying. I'm sorry about Jeremy's grandfather, and sorry that you'll have to play "getting to know you" at the funeral. I'm not really that shy in social situations, but that would bug even me. Hang in there...and you should totally barge in if he tries guys' night. Actually, sometimes that's a great way to unwind after stress. They don't expect you to re-live and analyze everything...you can just get drunk and play cards and forget it all. :) |
| from beautyx3 : |
| [email protected] |
| from goingloopy : |
| Email is [email protected]. Thanks. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| Sorry to hear about Jeremey's Grandpa. I can understand how you don't really want to meet his family the first time in a funeral situation, I'm really shy too. Just think of it like, most of the focus is going to be on his Grandfater and not on you, you can just be there for support :) Good luck. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| That's true. I used to haev light hair. I love dark hair and dark skin. I'm definately tanning next week. Good luck with the funeral! |
| from goingloopy : |
| I would like the password, please...and I hope everything's ok. |
| from aidawrites : |
| thanks for your input, i think you are right. im not going to stress about it anymore. and about your entry, i dont think you are being selfish at all, you are only being honest about how you feel about the whole situation and i would feel the same way. good luck at the funeral. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Funerals can be very awkward. You never know what to say to the mourning family. I wouldn't want that to be the first place I met some of his family members either but ultimately it will be fine and you are his girlfriend so you have to go out of respect for Jeremy and to honor the life of someone so very close to him. It's only three days, they will fly by. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| ohhh. you have my sympathy. i'm not too shy but NEVER know what to say at funerals/ when someone loses a loved one. what makes it worse for you is that its the family of your significant other AND its the first time you've met most of them. i don't think it's selfish. it's hard for you too. jermey's in good hands. |
| from beautyx3 : |
| Could I get your password? please? |
| from lonelylatina : |
| may i please have the password. thank you. [email protected] |
| from justagal : |
| Thanks for the info. I can't wait to hear about when you get engaged. [email protected] |
| from annalyn18 : |
| may I have the password? Your diary keeps me going here at work, I adore it. :) [email protected] |
| from spoildangelz : |
| Hey there! I was just trying to catch up on my favorite diaries and noticed yours was locked...can I have the password, please? My e-mail addy is [email protected] - Hope to hear from you soon! :-) |
| from princesstosh : |
| Michael and I have had almost this exact same fight (about finances and our future) and he was the same way as Jeremy. I think what guys dont understand is that "having money" doesnt mean lavish things and hired help---its just something for a sense of security. You want to know you'll have a home and a little money in case something goes wrong. Talking about the future now is really important, too. Get all of his feelings and thoughts out there before you get married and then once you're married you can just start working towards whatever goals the two of you have. (I sound like I'm an old married woman. Yuck. Really, I've only been married like 5 months!) Anyways, good luck. If Jeremy is anything like Michael (which it sounds like he is) You have to pry talks out of him, but its worth it in the end. Always keep the talks going!!! Good luck!!! |
| from horseshoes : |
| I'm such a goof! My e-mail is [email protected] |
| from summerroll : |
| Thanks for the note. My email is [email protected]. |
| from missingu288 : |
| Hi! I am sorry you had to lock up! Could I have your password please? [email protected] |
| from missingu288 : |
| Hi! I am sorry you had to lock up! Could I have your password please? [email protected] |
| from horseshoes : |
| Password please? I love reading. |
| from justagal : |
| May I have your password? I love your diary! |
| from summerroll : |
| Hey, Can you send me your password so that I can continue reading your diary, if that's okay. I hope everything is all right. |
| from jemimap : |
| Heya Chick! Sorry you've had to lock your diary. I'd love to keep reading if you don't mind sending me the password... Hope all is well. :) |
| from stillsingle : |
| Could you send me the password? Either leave it in my notes or e-mail me. |
| from lisarookie : |
| That sucks that you have to do that. My e-mail is [email protected] Hey! Maybe it was your crazy neighbor. |
| from princesstosh : |
| Hey there. I know how it is about locking, it sucks but sometimes you just have to. Oh and can I get your email address? I have a "secret" for you. Anyways, can I get the pw/un? [email protected] |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| Thanks for your kind words about my grandpa. Will you email me your password when you lock? [email protected] That's kinda wierd that you got all those hits. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I would love to go on a cruise with you too!!!: ) total good times... although i think we would have a bad influence on each other drinking one too many beers and what not! but its all gooD! maybe someday... hehehe.. the rings were scary!!! the whole situation i should say.. like a realityh check.. i tried on 10 or so and everyone i said "well... i dont know" its so just surreal.. i liked the emerald cut ones.. we will see... cant wait! :) have a great weekend... i hear ya on locking your diary.. i have had issues too with direct hits and random hits coming from god knows where. that is why i dont talk about "smoking" anymore.. rather use slang.... you never know .this shit is all out there for everyone to read, ya know.. i may lock mine again. who knows! have a great weekend chica! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| of course i want your info! email me: [email protected] Thanks! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Can I get your user name and password please? You can send it to [email protected] Thanks! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| can i have the username/pw please? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Can I get the username/password? |
| from soverycherry : |
| Could I get the username/password, please? I'm sorry you have to lock up - I know how that feels. I hope you have a good weekend! |
| from aidawrites : |
| dont forget to leave me your password! you can email it to [email protected] thanks! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I hear you. But hey at least you're able to go to a run-down motel. Eric and I aren't even close to being able to afford even THAT! lol. But believe me, I know where you're coming from. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I got the shirts from Cookie Designs or something. I just googled big sister t shirts and it came up. There are a bunch of good ones. I'll look it up and get back to you. |
| from princesstosh : |
| Your valentines sounds kind of like mine. Nothing too exciting but sweet just the same. As for the closet, I am the same way. (I hate admiiting it) Every few months I will go thru and pick up all the clothes--hang them, fold them or whatever and it will be nice and pretty. Then in a week its all gone to hell again. It seems to be the only part of my apartment that I just cannot keep clean! I have to do mine tonight too so I'll be thinking of you. Good luck!! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I've actually never been on the pan handle of Florida, I went to college in the tampa bay area. so I can't really offer good advice on that. But I can ask around:). Sorry to hear about your anxiety and stress affecting your sleeping. I have the exact same problem lately. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| ali has it down, but JUST IN CASE that didn't work, here's round 3 in teaching you how to link. I found the entry you want so just copy and paste from here on out. <a href="http://singlegirl.diaryland.com/040216_14.html">last year's vday</a> |
| from gumphood : |
| no sex on V-day!?!? Did he know this ahead of time?!!? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Okay this is how you link...this is the code...<a href="page youwanttolink.html">your description of the link (will appear underlined)<a/>. Go to the entry you want, last Valentine's Day and get the info from the address bar, delete everything in quotations and insert the info you got from the tool bar, leaving it in quotes. After that delete the words your description of the link (will appear underlined) and add what you want it to be called...Got it? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I think it would be warm in Destin in May. I went to Panama City for Spring Break my senior year of high school and it was hot and I think that was in March or April. It should be warm. Gulf Shores is fun but I guess it's not reasonably priced. I don't know how far the Outer Banks in North Carolina are for you but they are beautiful. My favorite place in Florida is Key West but I guess that is way out of the question. Too bad, it's hella fun. I'll see if I can find a way to make you understand the linking better. It was a little hard for me at first too. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| HOw funny is your mom, saying you should have crazy sex@ i cant imagine a conversation with me and my mom. YOU GO GIRL. Your neighbor is crazy..now you inspired me! |
| from gumphood : |
| did your mom purpose who would be doing the pile driving against Robbie's rumpus room? I assume the current best boy. But still. I would be dreafully embarrased. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Happy Valentine's Day!! I hope you and Jeremy enjoy yourselves!! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| oooo, evil neighbors - they suck. i used to have downstairs neightobrs who would have really loud sex when the got home from the bars at 2am. so then i started being really loud & stomping loud when i walked and slammed my cupboards when i woke up at 8am to "repay" them :) hahah, maybe he is growing pot. give the cops an anyomons type ;) |
| from goingloopy : |
| What an evil bitch. I was pissed off just READING that. Good luck...sounds like your roommate handled it very well. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I think that the package I'm bidding on does indeed come with that. What is it and why is it so essential? |
| from stillsingle : |
| Wow, that's creepy about Susan's killer, if he did infact kill her. I don't know what I'd do in your situation. Let the past go, concentrate on your future with Jeremy! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!! :) Im so excited for you! what will your new last name be, or cant you post it? :) we are ggoing to be planning around teh same time. you'll prob get engaged before me.. but i wish you the best and cant wait to hear the story about the engagement!! oh and your getting on a plane for your HONEYMOON! no isf, ands or BUTTS (ha get it.. kidding) about it :) love ya gir!!!!! |
| from gumphood : |
| You're gonna need a new name |
| from aliboomboom : |
| The whole thing does sound staged. It sucks that the only two people that will ever know are her and him. However one day he will reach the golden gates and God will know what really happened that day and he'll have to answer for it whatever it may be. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Congratulations! I know you are excited but really stop asking about it. You know it's going to be far more exciting if you don't know every tiny detail and besides let him feel like he's surprising you, that's obviously what he wants. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Congratulations! I know you are excited but really stop asking about it. You know it's going to be far more exciting if you don't know every tiny detail and besides let him feel like he's surprising you, that's obviously what he wants. |
| from gumphood : |
| God that is a terrible story. Oh gosh thats tough. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Wow what a story. So they were in a car wreck or what? I mean if it was a car wreck then he didn't murder her or anything. I think I might be confused. |
| from aidawrites : |
| hey girly, i read your diary all the time actually. my password is pittbrad and my username is aida. ta ta for now! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i have the same question as ali. why only two years? i'm sorry. i think id find comfort in the fact that i COULD do something psycho too. thinking about the psychic suggestion. doug and i just got i a fight right before going on our adventure race/competition thing. hmm. |
| from princesstosh : |
| When I was 16, my aunt and uncle had this friend that hung around with us a lot (he was 28) I remember he was always hitting on me, though he always had girlfriends (who had babies,usually baby girls) I thought he was a little on the psycho side, but seemed pretty nice--either way I pretty much steered clear. One day he got kicked out of his house (he was living with his grandparents) and he left his stuff at my aunt and uncles. Including his computer, which had all kinds of sicko kid porn. We're talking disks and disks of saved pictures of exploited kids...boys and girls. My aunt and uncle have 2 boys, and he had baby sat them twice before. He (and the boys) say nothing ever happened but I was in a RAGE over it. My aunt and uncle called the police on him for the pictures and shortly afterwards a girl my age came forward saying he sexually molested her, and then right after her one of his ex's came forward saying she thought he abused her daughter. He was in jail from when I was 17, up until this year. After I found out he was released I drove by his house, thinking that I should flaten his tires, or do something really horrible to him. I mean, how do those people walk free? So, I know where you're coming from. Even if he didnt do anything to my cousins, he could have and that just pisses me the fuck off. He took advantage of helpless little girls---I mean, he should pay. I guess I just wanted to tell you I totally feel your situation. And, although you may never do anything, it gives you some kind of weird peace that you could. I'm so sorry about your friend. Maybe one day our justice system will be right---I've always thought an eye for an eye was pretty much a good idea. Hang in there and try to have a good weekend. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| i remember reading about that tragedy but forgot what happened.. which entry did you write about that? I am psycho sometimes and would do something like that as lonmg as i KNEW he would never know it was me and come and kill me ya know.... man oh man! have a great weekend! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Why did he only have to serve two years? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Why did he only have to serve two years? |
| from princesstosh : |
| I dont think that very many people are where they want to be, job wise. I know that when I was a little girl I never dreamed of doing office work for a dairy, but here I am. What's important to remember is that its essential to Work to live, not live to work. I've always thought what goes on outside of work (family, love) is more imporant than your job. I'm getting so excited for you about the engagement!!! Would he do Valenties Day? Or, are there any important dates coming up? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I took that quiz and I was Julie. Awesome. As for the engagement, don't you want it to be a surprise? I don't even want to mention it before I get engaged. I don't want to talk about it, I don't want to pick out a ring, I don't want to know anything. It seems more special that way at least to me. I mean how do you know Jeremy really wants to do it if you keep asking him about it? Don't ask anymore!! Let him at least surprise you with something!! And yeah I wish I looked like Summer as well, I was actually hoping I would get her at the end of my quiz but alas I did not. I am Julie. Blech. |
| from stillsingle : |
| You may have kidney stones...those shouldn't be messed with. My friend had them and ended up in the ER. Same thing...pain in her back on the right side. Go to the doctor, even if you think you're feeling better. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Kharma is a bitch. I know that Jeff's wife has lots of reasons for feeling the way that she does about him. He's wonderful in a friend way but he's just not ready to be married. I don't know why they ever got married. Alas it's not my problem. I just want to be his friend. Don't worry, I'm not getting involved. |
| from clarity25 : |
| My mother is the exact same way, She has been calling non-stop all week . "Did you go to the doctor?" "How is the pain in your ear?" "Are you taking your anti-biotics?" "describe the symptoms?" "Weren't you also sick in the beginning of Jan.?" "Are you taking care of yourself?"..etc etc. haha, I think that's just what Mom's do..it drives me up the wall. I really hope you feel better though and that pain in your side subsides. Take care... |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| hey, i had a similar situation last year. my ovary hurt on my left side. i thought i may have a cyst but the dr. said i didn't. i never really figured it out i went to 3 different drs. and had an ultrasound but nothing. then one gave me Levequin because he thought i may have an infection (which was absolutly terrible - never take it) which made me feel even worse. once i quit that and got over the problems that gave me it finally got better. and my 60 year old dr. who delivered me asked me if it hurt everytime jason "trust". that was embarrassing i don't want to talk about that with the man who delivered me :) anyway...enough rambling hope you feel better. p.s. love the kitty! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| your such a hottie! :) i hope your tummy feels better... you sound more confident recently (perhaps al the weight los.. Are you eating girl? heheh (i sound like a mother) Love ya! |
| from clarity25 : |
| omg! The cat! lol! That had me cracking up! The picture of you is beautiful, I like your hair style!:) |
| from gumphood : |
| Nice eyes...huge photo. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Hopefully nothing is seriously wrong with you. A friend of mine had a cyst on her ovary, too. She had 3 surgeries and they finally removed the cyst and the ovary because it was so big and had combined into one thing...better to get it checked out early and not wait! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| you're beautiful! goodness me, you are. i hope they find out what it is. i know something is wrong with me as well but all the doctors are telling me its stressed. so im closely monitoring everything. i hate that feeling where you feel like no one's giving you a satisfactory answer about what exactly is going wrong. good luck! |
| from goingloopy : |
| If you are using Paint (the program that usually comes with the computer...start menu, under accessories)...you can go to the "Image" menu, hit "stretch/skew" and just type in a low percentage (like 20 or 50 instead of 100)...and it will shrink. Then use the square box tool thingy to cut out the small part, and paste it into a new file, which gets rid of the white stuff. :) |
| from gumphood : |
| I thought that was a entry about liking steak...then about not having money, and then you drop the dead friend bomb at the end. Wild. I don't want to hurt Jarod, I just want to see Subway do something else. |
| from princesstosh : |
| Dinner sounded wonderful--you made me so hungry!! About your family--firstly the cutting thing was ridiculous and you were totally right to shoot a glare towards your brother. As for your sister in law sometimes you are right, it is better just to keep your mouth shut. But, who am I to say? Look at the wonderful *ha* relationship I have with my brother in law. But, I totally agree that you are the black sheep, but its something to be very proud of. You really "get it". Life isnt about money, or what job you have or your new furniture. It's truly about loving with your whole heart and trying to make a difference. If I were you, I'd be very proud to be the different one. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Your family dinners sound like some of mine. Luckily, the older my family gets, the more liberal some of them are. Except my dad. But I like pissing him off, because it's fun. :) And PS, aren't you only like 26? That's so not almost 30, girlfriend. ;) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| The date right now is just a tentative plan. It all depends on me getting a sitter and on him being able to leave work early. I'm just so nervous. What if he doesnt' like me? What if I don't like him? And because we like each other on a personality level, will it make us more likely to like each other physically or not? The whole thing makes me sick to my stomach. Oh and he didn't call me for two days last week so he said "he owed me" well now he's saying I have to decide what exactly he owes me by 4:45 today. What the hell am I going to say? |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| when you left me a note and wrote try and antivirus thingee (the word antivirus, is underlined, it probably is underlined now too.. if i go back and look at this note :) Ho annoying! i tried to do the picture thing you got from clarity and bohemiam bu i dotn have any close up pics.. i love that pic of you though.. sweet! have a great night! If i am ever in Indy.. we are going out!!!!! |
| from pixie-grl : |
| LOL! You are too funny, and no you don't look like monica.... xoxo |
| from clarity25 : |
| Those pictures were cracking me up! I loved the drunk one! Isn't it awesome, I had so much fun going through all the variations! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Oh my God, that is funny! I'll have to check that out sometime. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Those pictures are hilarious. I did it. Mine were funny as well. I should post them. As for Jeff, don't worry I wouldn't get involved in that mess. However if they divorce then sign me up. J/K. Brandon is great so far, we'll see. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| hahahahahahhahaha and no you do not look like monica. |
| from summerroll : |
| No, you do NOT look like Monika Lewinsky. Not even in the altered pic. Jeremy looks hot as an old dude. BTW, thaks for belated birthday wish. |
| from gumphood : |
| that was the best "Neo" answer yet. Kudos. Kudos indeed. |
| from gumphood : |
| thanks for the add |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| ok i changed my password to bullshit.. lets see how long that will last til whatever shit hacks into my computer :) love ya! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I didnt change it.. i am having MAJOR issues with my computer.. same password.. i cant get into anyones diaries.... damn it! :) I will try and fix it soon... hopefully.. i need to erase my computer of everything to get rid of whatever shit is taking over my harddrive cause well, this is crap! any clue? It took me 6 tries to read your last entries bc my computer kept rebooting.. how frustrating! but congrats on the 30 pounds, that is amazing! loev you girl!!!!!!!!! |
| from goingloopy : |
| ..30 is awesome. Go girl. And PS, your steak dinner description made me mega-hungry. I can't afford that, either (either in terms of the diet or the money)...but mmmm, garlic mashed potatoes. Also, to cure the bio clock thing...go to Wal-Mart, and hang out in the baby department or around the toys or anywhere, really, and listen to all the whining and screaming. Birth control at it's finest. :) |
| from alwaysaroura : |
| You are right. This is not easy at all. I have to be strong though. It has to be over. There is no other option. Congrats on hitting the thirty pound mark!! Quite a victory if you ask me!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| How long did it take for you to lose thirty pounds? What exactly are you doing? Weight watchers? Do you go to the meetings and everything? |
| from horseshoes : |
| Haven't you lived there for awhile? I just don't see how this is suddenly a problem when it's not like you just moved in. I think I would talk to the manager. If I remember right she seemed to like you when you first moved in. It would be a good just to talk to her so you can nip it in the bud before it got out of control. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| My sister has the same problem as you do!! My dad has actually had to talk to her neighbor a bunch of times!!It's terrible. Talk to your apartment manager if you can't talk to her!! |
| from goingloopy : |
| My suggestion, because I hate people who are like that, is to teach the ho the meaning of "loud". However, if you don't want to deal with it, I would definitely ask your complex manager to mediate. He/she could go to her apt, you could turn on the TV and music, and he/she can tell her that she is a psycho hose beast and to quit her bitching. Dear god, that is annoying. In the meantime...headphones are good, at least for music. Good luck. |
| from gumphood : |
| I was going to comment that I like that you are attached now, because I imagine you title wouldn't be good for long. I know. My girlfriend also hates football totally. I try not to inundate her with it, but its impossible in January. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I understand your situation with the wedding, the stress, the frustration and wanting two seperate receptions. I was going through a similiar struggle. Eric had friends through his late mother that wanted to attend. They were judgmental, hard-core christian conservatives and had all these ideas of how our wedding SHOULD be, and then there was my family who isn't like that at all. I was afraid at how Eric's "family" would respond to mine and all the conflicts that would develop. I thought of just having a private one with friends and then a seperate more traditional one. But in the end, we just threw them all together and it worked out. People tend to be on their best behavior at weddings, you'd be surprised. (well, most of the time) Best of luck with all of that, also good luck with the E-mail to your mother. I really hope everything works out! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Well, when you do finally get married I'm sure you and Jeremy will compromise on the reception....stick his family in the back at their own private little table. |
| from sugar-slit : |
| I love chicken fingers!! So full of trans-fats! Mmmm...I miss them. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| I just wanted to add something about the situation with his family. I am kind of on the other side. My family is more "redneck" ok...they are, but i am aboslutly not. However, i think you should not try to make them be different then they are. I know it kinda sucks, but they are part of Jermey and they are his family. If you're not accepting of them, he may feel like you are not accepting part of him. That's just my 2 cents :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| That sucks about Jeremy's family. Why are they such red necks? I would definately set some boundaries too. You don't want your friends and family to be shocked when they meet his family. And men not wearing suits to a wedding is ridiculous!! And his mom doesn't wear a bra? WTF? That is gross. Where are they from anyways? Does JEremy not get why you want to lay these boundaries? Can he talk to his parents about stuff like that? IT's terrible that you are going to have to deal with them for the rest of your life. How often do you have to see theM? |
| from goingloopy : |
| On a blank line, just type <hr>. That's all there is to it. I'm semi-retarded, too...I've learned a lot from that "Lissa Explains It All" website. It's supposed to be for kids. My ass. Of course, kids probably get it... |
| from alwaysaroura : |
| Thanks for the note. It's just so hard to be in love and not have it go as smoothly as you want it to. I know that you and JEremy have had your ups and downs too so I guess that it is to be expected when you love someone so much. I hope that you guys stay happy for years to come! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I am totally on your same wave length.. completely!! i consider you a good bud (thanks diaryland!!) that is why diaryland is sooo good, things you never could say you express through your fingers typing and well, other people see your vulnerable side and what is bothering you. I totally hear ya. I am always conserned about if my parents thing that pete is "totally fit"... but if you LOVE them.... your parents should find nothing but hapiness in your hapiness.. i love ya! email me@ |
| from princesstosh : |
| You'll probably need this (duh): [email protected] |
| from princesstosh : |
| Sure, I'd love for you to email a picture. I've kind of added white and black into my reds and maroons too. The curtains are a sheer white and I've been looking for a sheer maroonish-red that will match the bedspread to tie into it. I looked at canopy beds on Ebay, and I found one for $90, shipping included but I get so hesitant when it comes to big purchases on ebay. I'll have to check out JC pennys! I think the letter is definetly the way to go. But, I want to add that as long as you're happy, no one else should matter. It's hard when it comes to family but Jeremy WILL be your family once you marry him, so you have to consider that, too. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I think an email or letter would be a great idea. I express myself better in writing as well so I always do that. Plus I hate confrontation and writing makes it somewhat more bearable. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Thank you so much for that insight i am soo bitter and it is sooo hard seeing your friend lose HERSELF like that.. i love you girl. and FUCKIN post pics of yourself.. remember we are here for YOU and hopefully one day i will run into you! how cool would that be, seriously.. thank you, and i really do love you! :) |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| you shouldn't crop yourself out of your pictures. we all like you & want to see you. i can't believe you're going to be engaged. i hate you, i'm jealous :) just teasing. i'm excited ot hear about it. can't even imagine the excitement your'e building up knowing it's going to come. i would probably be going insane by now. lol. |
| from goingloopy : |
| ...hey, it was hard enough getting my internal personal trainer bitch to work for me...and I have not even attempted to quit smoking. One bad habit at a time, says I. :) Your future hubby is a cutie. And you shouldn't crop yourself out of pictures...because you've posted pictures before, and you are not even close to hideous. |
| from clarity25 : |
| Aww! That's the cutest picture of your future hubby! I know what you mean about the anticpation in your life for the engagement, marriage and starting a new phase of your life. I remember that excited feeling in my stomach when I was getting engaged to Eric. He asked my father for my hand in marriage, but just for the "effect" I guess, to show "respect". My father was touched by the gesture. Oh btw, I put a small pic up on my profile so you can get an idea of what I look like. Though I'll probably be taking it down in a day:) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| It's good that you are excited about your future!! I can't believe that your one friend hasn't had a boyfriend in five years, she is so pretty!! And you are not a hideous beast!! Not at all so go ahead and post pictures! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| jennlynn24 is username and password is charlie (my doggie)... i am having issues with a best friend and i think she was reading up on me last night. i may unlock it in a few days... :) have a great day girl! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| ooo, i'm excited for you. your ring sounds realy cool. i don't like those big huge diamonds that look gaudy either. it needs to have class. sounds like it's getting close, espcially with jermey having the wedding march - that's so sweet. sounds like you too are really happy :) |
| from clarity25 : |
| congrats on your future engagement, that ring you described sounds beautiful and it's so romantic that he has the wedding march on his Alarm clock! Oh and congrats on stopping smoking, man I really have to follow your example! I know what you mean about "Reality Bites", I held my VHS copy close to me and never let it out of my sight..for nearly 11 years now. It's all tattered, with lines running through the image when we put it in!:). |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Wow we may be engaged at the same time (if all goes well with our boys).. Oh and my friend calls her fiance Bunny.. it has to do with being floppy (yes down there) and whatever.. its funny bc she told us all one drunken night.. it was funny! so congrats on the weightloss, nonweight gain... you rock girl.. NOW POST SOME PICTURES WOULD YA! :0) |
| from princesstosh : |
| The b. Rabbit thing might have to do with Eminems movie 8 mile. They called him B. Rabbit because his mom said he looked like a cute little rabbit. Congrats on upcoming engagement! I bet you can barely sit still, now. I knew my engagement was coming when it happened, but didnt know when so it was hard to wait! Sounds like life is grand....quitting smoking, an engagement coming, weight loss! Way to go!! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Congrats, well, a little early I guess. You'll have to post a picture of the ring you found...sounds beautiful. :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| That's great about the smoking and weight loss!! I'm doing better on the smoking but I still smoke a lot when I drink. I don't know why. And I'm losing weight at an okay pace. I heard Weight Watchers is great though. As for the ring, sounds pretty!! I want a princess cut diamond as well. Post pictures when you get it!! |
| from stillsingle : |
| I've never heard of the dream house, but just to be nice, I won't enter...up your chances at least a little :) Just as long as I get an invite to the party! |
| from pixie-grl : |
| Thats so funny! Last time they had the dream house, I entered like 5 million times. Sucks that you can enter only once a day.... lol |
| from clarity25 : |
| No, I wish! No it's just the funny dancing scene from Charlie's angels. (one of my favorites) But your note reminded me that I still have to send you that picture I deleted from my entry! I'll do that this weekend! Thanks for your note, Hope you're having a great day! |
| from appellation : |
| Hey chick. Just wanted to wish you a Happy New Year and tell you that I really enjoy reading your journal. Thought you might like to know that I read a study that showed Weight Watchers was the only diet regimen on which people who lost weight actually kept it off at a 2 year follow-up. I did Weight Watchers a few years back to take off 15 pounds that I out on sophomore year. I know you and Jeremy will both do great on it! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| happy new year girl! i hope 2005 treats you well and you get a ring on your finger (me TOO!!) oh and forget about the diet tonight.. tonight should be all about partying, munchin out and just havign a great time! post some pics girl. Love ya!!!!! ~Jenn~ |
| from clarity25 : |
| Thanks for your last note, What you wrote completely made my day. Thanks for that:). What's happening in Indonesia and all the asian countries right now is so horrific and it's amazing how many people just turn a blind eye and switch the channel. Every dollar helps, it's a small thing..but it's something, right? That's a strange story about your office being haunted! that would creep me out! lol. I hope you have a Happy New years! best wishes-Clarity |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Figure it out soon!! I love seeing pictures!! |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| cool a digital camera! glad that jermey had a good christmas too. jason's family isn't into holidays either - he didn't even see his family. i tried to include him too. sounds like your shopping was good. hey could you help me find some new shoes! ;) and your outfit sounds cute - i love tommy stuff. |
| from clarity25 : |
| Yeah, I was humming x-mas songs this morning too. I guess I'm getting into the christmas spirit too..somewhat reluctantly, but it's hitting me. I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas! I hope you have a great time during the holidays! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| MERRY CHRISTMAS!! I hope that your first Christmas as a non single girl is full of joy and happiness!! Thank you for all the kind words and encouragement that you have given me over the past year!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Why can't he go with you to the family breakfast? |
| from pixie-grl : |
| He "cut back" on drinking, too. He doesn't smoke, so he didn't have as much to give up. The thing is, if I don't quit all of them cold turkey, its even harder for me. The weaning shit never worked for me. So far so good, though... :)XOXO Happy Holidays! |
| from princesstosh : |
| I think horseshoes, Linda and Ali said it all. You lost 22 pounds! That is definetly worth celebrating. Also, I know you and Jeremy had a few rough spots and you worked through them, so that is also a big acomplishment. I think for women weight issues and relationship problems are probably the top 2 big things we all want to fix/change. You've done a wonderful job at both, so theres no reason to be down on yourself. Teach me to lose 22 pounds? My jeans are skrinking (or, thats what I like to say, it sounds better! heheh) by the minute! |
| from horseshoes : |
| Bobbi sold rat terrier dogs. They met on the internet. Bobbi had a litter that she was trying to sell. Under an alias, the woman got directions to her house and killed her. Sopposedly she had a miscarriage in October. No one is sure if it was the truth. She told everyone she was pregnant with twins also. I couldn't believe taht she had the gall to take it to the church to be baptized. She seems to have no remorse for what she did. THe whole process was very pre-meditated. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i love ali. don't you? she pretty much said everything i was going to say. I think you're absolutely lovely and you have such a pretty face and smile and from your pictures, i don't know what you're talking about about airplane seatbelts. you're not that big at all! also, thin girls are very insecure of their looks as well. i cant really call myself thin anymore (im gaining weight as fast as you're losing weight... think 17 lbs in the past 3 months) but now and when i was thinner, i was always upset about my lack of boobs.. i always thought people with boobs could wear things i only dream of wearing.. i hate my back and its scar and i hate my face.. i throw away most of my pictures and there was an era of my life that lasted about 3 years where I didn't even look in the mirror cuz i hated myself so much. i'm digressing.. what i want to say is that i bet you'll look smashing at this party and jeremy will go weak in his knees seeing you all dolled up :) when you dress up, you tend to feel a little out of your element and it makes sex even hotter! so here's to hot sex afterwards. |
| from snoozie-girl : |
| hey i just read Lovely Bones too. wasn't that an awesome book? |
| from horseshoes : |
| Hey, give yourself a big pat on the back, YOU HAVE LOST 22 POUNDS!!! You are much harder on yourself than anyone else, I'm sure of it. I'm not the skinniest thing in the world either. I'm VERY self concious. With my job I'm not heavy but I'm built like a football player. I where nothing but t-shirts and jeans so no one notices. I'm a freak about what my body used to look like and disgusted at how I look now. I'm completely embarassed. You are not the only person who is not happy with your body by far. Hang in there and keep up the great work with your diet. It sounds like it is really paying off. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| You really don't appear that big in any of your photos and you have gorgeous hair and a beautiful face so don't worry. The thing is even the thin girls feel insecure and they probably aren't really worryinga about what you look like. They don't invite you so that you can be the "big ugly girl", they invite you because they love you and want you there. They don't go out of their way to make you feel uncomfortable, it's just fun to dress up for New Year's and they know that you'll look beautiful, you just need to know that. My best friend is overweight, much bigger than you and I'm sure she has some of the same thoughts as you but she always ends up having a great time when we dress up and Lane Bryant has some beautiful clothes that the skinny stores don't. Plus Jeremy loves you and he wants to be with you, remember that. I think that you are utterly lovely and I hate that you feel so negatively about yourself. You are doing something about it though and for that you deserve credit. Go out, dress up, and have a great time! And as for flying, who cares if you have to ask for extra length on your seat belt? It happens all the time and your friends will love you anyways. Plus once you got there it wouldn't matter and you'd have a great time in VEGAS!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I bet there are Polo models on the website that look HOT in those hot pink sweaters. I'm not saying I would buy anyone one. I personally hate neon colors, lime green is terrible. I have two best friends who claim that as their favorite color and it makes me sick but I'm saying the certain kind of guy could pull it off. Me I prefer reds and blues and greens and golds but light pink is cute sometimes. You need to scan more photos too!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh I love Polo!! I think guys look hot in pink. It takes a certain kind of guy to pull it off. Of course we all know about my obsession with Ralph Lauren. I love preppy guys. I used to buy Ian all kinds of Polo stuff for Christmas. Of course he preferred Brooks Brothers for dress clothes which was fine. Anyways it's nice what you are doing for Jeremy, it sucks his family can't afford anything. Are they getting you a gift? I'm glad that your parents bought him something. He must be growing on them? |
| from clarity25 : |
| Thanks so much for your note:), it cheered me up and I was pretty down. Also you're right..the vacation time is one good reason to look forward to the holiday! hope you're having a good day! oh..and I'm still pondering a good sex position to recommend. I'll get back to you on that one;) |
| from bethany9 : |
| thanks! oh man, high school reunion, i am already addicted! that jamie girl ought to be shot! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh my gosh!! I can't believe that he said "Yeah didn't you know that!!" I would have been traumatized!! Of course we all have cellulite on our asses so I guess it's not big deal but still, couldn't he at least pretend? As for Tuesday night, it used to be my favorite tv night as well except now Laguna Beach is over and so is One Tree Hill for a while so all I'm left with is Real World and I hate this season. Blech, that sucks. I am going to start watching High School Reunion, I watched it last year and loved it. Thursdays are my new tv night!! I love the OC and Life as we know it. |
| from pixie-grl : |
| You're too funny!!! |
| from wish4u : |
| My diary is now locked, user name: all password: beer Thanks for reading:) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Isn't Cold Mountain a wonderful movie? I love it. It's almost as good as the Notebook. Almost. Anyways glad to hear that you and Jeremy are back to happy!! Yay!! I hope it stays that way!! |
| from betchy : |
| its that old saying "you always hurt the ones you love". dont give him too much of a hard time. at the end of the day he's a bloke. they cant help fucking up. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Good luck with the whole Jeremy thing. Don't stay with him just to have someone. You would find someone else if you and Jeremy broke up. H's not the be all end all after all. |
| from aidawrites : |
| okay, i was reading your last couple entries and i was compelled to write a note because the same thing happened to me. I caught my then boyfriend lying to me about looking at personal ads. I didnt break up with him at that moment, but i knew i couldnt trust him again. With time this led on to more lies and eventually he cheated on me with a girl he met online. What Jeremy did might have been innocent or whatever he says, but once a liar always a liar (i think) Remember to put your foot down, and the most important thing is ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT INSTINCT. If you ever "feel" like he is cheating, he probably is. Us women have real intuition we cant deny. |
| from princesstosh : |
| I've been meaning to note you for a few days now, sorry. Anyway, about the Jeremy thing. I am cutting him slack on this one. I have *gasp* looked thru personal ads just to look, for no particular reason. But, if he has repeatedly lied to you, or made you weary of what he might be doing, then I think a long talk is in order. If he is anything like Michael, he will cry and apologize and then it might happen again until you take action. I think being icy is totally key, so that he gets the point. Actions speak louder than words, right? If he does something again, maybe go spend the night at a friends house without him knowing your whereabouts. After a night without you maybe he'll realize what a jerk he's been. But, dont give him too many chances. I just hope that you find trust---I've only been married a few months but I can already tell you that trusting eachother is of utmost imporatance. Also, respect. He should respect you more if he is doing things behind your back that he KNOWS would upset you. I know relationship problems hurt worse than any other kind--they affect your whole life and mood. I'm sorry you're having a tough time and wish you all the luck in the world. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I know you love him and he SEEMS like he's the best thing that ever happened to you, but if he was, he wouldn't be lying and looking at personal ads and porn (from your previous entry) behind your back. Something is motivating him to do this, you need to talk to him to find out what it is. I would also refrain from talking to you family about it. Your friends, yes. Family, NO! Espeically if you think you two will actually get married one day (after you work out all the issues). Family will never forget all the negative things you've said...trust me. I'm going through that with my brother and his girlfriend right now. Do you think you rushed into this too soon with him? Moving in together and all? I know after moving in with both of my ex's, it really opens LOTS of doors you're usually not expecting, and it sure opens your eyes to the person they really are. You always have a choice, you don't have to put up with it. You shouldn't have to. Take care. ((((HUGS)))) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| a lot of your rationalizations in this entry echoed exactly what i thought with doug and skankass.. the whole- "I know he's not cheating on me because he's with me every night etc" and the everything is PERFECT and you wouldnt even suspect a thing had you not looked.. but you looked for a reason...your gut's important.. i also know what you mean by being embarrassed.. you kind of want to complain to your friends but you're afraid of them seeing you as weak= as one of those spineless dependent girls.. but dont worry about what they think. worry about yourself first. make him tell you WHY he lied... was it because he's hiding something more or if he thought you would be upset? is there any possible way you can distance yourself physically from him? it's easier to evaluate what you want for yourself when you're away and it'll give him time to feel the gravity of what he did to you. |
| from clarity25 : |
| Hi again, I can understand your frustration over Jeremy looking at Personal Ads. That would really upset me too and I would probably respond the same way. Particularly if I had been lied to in the past. I don't know the right advice to give, but I really hope everything works out. He could have been just looking for entertainment purposes with no particular motive, just browsing. The best thing to do is talk it out and tell him to be entirely honest with you. Sometimes things aren't as bad and horrible as they initially seem when everything is put out on the table. You're in my thoughts.. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I know that you love Jeremy but saying that he is the best thing that ever happened to you even though he repeatedly lies to you is just not right. He shouldn't do it. There's no need for it. Who cares if he is bored? There are a million othere things for him to look at on the internet. I've been in your situation before and I thought well i just love him so much and whatever but it's not healthy for you to be in a relationship where someone lies and it's not healthy for you not to trust him and it's not healthy for you to feel the need to check his email and voicemail and all that. Don't you want someone that you can just trust? Without doing all those things? I know that I do. Plus maybe your parents are right, I mean you're blinded by the fact that you love him but they aren't and it's not like if he was a great guy that your parents would purposely want you to be miserable, ya know? So I think that they are being honest with you. If he doesn't change then you will end up being one of those wives that says "Well he might have a mistress but I'm staying with him for hte kids." I think you are better than all this, I think that you deserve more than this, I think you need to really evaluate the situation an realize that most likely he won't change and that you'll end up dealing with shit like this for the rest of your life. Sure doesn't sound good to me. Good luck though. I know it hurts! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i think so long as your weightloss is slow and not really dramatic, you shouldn't have to worry about loose skin. slow and steady is key |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| teehee. camel toe. hahaha. have a great weekend. and i'm jealous of your man's job. sigh. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I'm sorry you're feeling so down right now, but you do have a lot to be thankful for! I'd give anything to have a boyfriend in my life and be able to be with someone all of my friends actually liked, too. I met my closest friends through my ex, he was not happy at all when they stayed friends with me after our break up, but it's all good now. In fact, I'll probably be going to see Jay's band tonight with all of "our" friends. Happy Thanksgiving! |
| from beautyx3 : |
| your pictures are great! you ARE way pretty. Post more! have a good weekend! |
| from goingloopy : |
| ...working out BEFORE work? My, but you're more motivated than I am. My only exercise in the a.m. is lifting my coffee cup with one hand and cig with the other...I do like Debra Winger...have you seen "Shadowlands" and "Forget Paris"? Love them. But make sure you have some kleenex for Shadowlands. That's all I'm saying. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Oh, I love your pictures! You remind me so much of my nephews mom, you are so beautiful. My face does the same thing...gets all puffy and squishy (or at least I tend to think so) when I'm at my heavier weights. I'm always pulling my face taught to remember what I looked like at 17 and 130 lbs! Now I'm 150...ugh. I feel for ya! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I know how you feel, I'm in the exact same place today..battling with aunt flo and cramping, worked long hours and want to crumble up into a ball. You're beautiful! You're not fat OR ugly! trust me on this. |
| from classygirl83 : |
| I think that your beautiful. I think that you have gergous eyes and a pretty smile. Don't be so hard on yourself. I know how it feels to be PMSing. I'm supposed to be on mine this week, but it's not really here. Oh well. I hope tha tyour day gets better and that your happy! Oh yeah, I'm girlygirl83, and now i'm this the UN is love and the pw is happiness. If you wanna read! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| what is it about the way you write that i love so much? everytime you update, i save you for last and read very very slowly cuz it's like a good book. i don't want it to end. that aside, your entry today almost made me cry - not cuz it was sad.. but because i was about to cry anyway. (i'm on my period as well and totally understand) I have 3 pimples on my chest right now and my shirt doesnt cover it.. you are beautiful in both your pictures. you happier in the 2nd one and it shows through your smile. you have a million dollar smile. |
| from betchy : |
| honey, i just checked your photos, and i think you look lovely in both of them. you have gorgeous big eyes and a lovely smile. weight isnt really an issue. i have been a size 8, a size 18 and everything in between (currently a 16). i have lost weight since the pics i posted, you will be able to see the difference when i post some more recent ones, and it hasnt really made any differnce to me (apart from i can walk up the stairs at work without seeing spots!). thanks for the compliments, but you are absolutely gorgeous yourself *mwah* |
| from horseshoes : |
| I think both pictures look good. It just looks like you are smiling differently in the top picture versus the bottom. The different haircut changes things too. Not bad by any means, just different. Cheer up, I'm jealous of your bright white smile! |
| from goingloopy : |
| You do look good in your pictures...don't be embarrassed about them at all. Zits suck. PMS sucks. Love the word "gritchy"...I'll have to remember that. Have something chocolate, because it will make you feel better. Diets don't count when you're hormonal.... |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Life is bittersweet sometimes, huh? I feel a lot of those things too. I feel like I'll miss out on some things because I had Griffin but then I love him so much that I'm almost happy to forget about all the plans that I had in mind and just focus on what I do have. You love Jeremy and he loves you. So what if he's not who your parents would have chosen? You probably wouldn't be happy with anyone that they chose, right? And yeah having the perfect in laws sounds great but really who has that? When you and Jeremy get married, do what makes you happy. The people that love you most will surprise you. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Yeah, well, at our Y, there's no such thing as sign-up sheets...so when it's not crowded, you can hang on a machine as long as you want. But I wish we did have them for crowded times, because there are a few serious offenders. I understand that it sucks to interrupt your workout, but everyone else is paying a membership fee too...grrr. That, and the gross people who don't wipe off the weight machines. (I said I was annoyed about everything today...hehehe.) |
| from princesstosh : |
| Hey there sweetie. I feel your pain, really I do. Michaels family and my family really clash. His family is more like Jeremys, and mine is just like yours. More upper class acting, I guess you'd say. You know what we did? We said to hell with what everyone says/does and put them all together anyway. That's really what makes a wedding fun. You just let all the stresses melt away and enjoy yourself. I was very suprised how well his family cleaned up, and behaved well at the wedding. I think you might be suprised to. Dont give up your dream because others get in the way. It will be a perfect, romantic day for you and him, and that's all that matters! |
| from goingloopy : |
| I am a weirdo, I will admit, but I hate weddings. I think they are a waste of time and money. The important thing is that you've found someone you love and care about and that you are committing your life to. I know it's a fantasy we're all conditioned to have...but what's one day when you have the rest of your life? Plus, your parents may come around, and you might be surprised to find out what your families have in common... |
| from jess1976 : |
| Congrats on the weight loss. I remember when I first started WW, it was awesome the first 2 weeks... I lost almost 10 lbs. It's really motivating to go and see the weight come off. I have fallen off the bandwagon though and haven't been to WW in months. I swear I have no motivation. Well, good luck on your weight loss journey. I hope you do well... you sound very positive and motivated. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Hey, the Vikings play the Colts on Monday night, should be good! I have a feeling the Colts will pull through, but Randy Moss may be playing. We'll see! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Good for you for staying positive! No, I'm not looking forward to the OC...I had my "show" back in the day, 90210. I haven't gotten into any of those teen shows since then. I guess, being the big adult that I am, I watch more of CSI and stuff like that, although I am a reality TV junkie...there goes my big adult status! ha ha |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| ewww about the election. hey, about the OC- do you kknow if they're doing encores over the weekend again? i have a damn club meeting tomorrow im heading up and... sigh will have to miss out on the OC.. LOVED the show last season. i watched it religiously |
| from goingloopy : |
| Election=bad. Weight loss=good. :) Also...on the nail-biting thing...what REALLY broke me of the habit was getting my nails done (acrylics). You CAN'T bite them, plus, you're paying for them, so you won't want to screw them up. And they look pretty, too. |
| from clarity25 : |
| The outcome of today's election was disheartening. (sigh). Thanks for the great Halloween costume suggestion you gave me last week and congratulations on stopping the nail biting. I've been trying that for years! I even bought some nasty tasting clear nailpolish to curb the bad habit, but I bit them anyway..ugh. |
| from princesstosh : |
| Hey there! Saw that you added me and wanted to drop by and say hi!! The weight watchers thing sounds great! I need to do something in the weight loss area, I just cant seem to find the motivation to get started. I will, though. I'm trying to stop drinking cokes, I think thats one of my biggest problems. I LOVE cokes. For some reason, I think there are no other drinks. Like, if Im at home and I open the fridge and theres no cokes then I think we have nothing to drink, when in reality theres juice, water...lots of healthy things. I dont know, I'm weird. But, I am so proud of you!!! Maybe it will rub off on me. |
| from girlygirl83 : |
| I do that all the time. I talk down about my slef and I tell my self, that I'm ugly and that no one would want to be with me. IT's true for the most part, but I Have to not think like that. I've just got to think a little higher of myself. I'm sure that Jeremy thinks that your great. I really like r eading you. I'm sure that you turn him on still. Don't worry. I know though. I worry too. I hope that you have a great day! Weight watchers is really great. I've tried it, but I don't know. I don't have that much self-disipline. I hope that you have a great day and week! |
| from goingloopy : |
| Just a tip from a fellow dieter...drinking something like rum/Jack Daniels with Diet Coke only has one point. And 65 calories. No need to let dieting interfere with your social life....hehehe. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Oh, sorry to hear you're going through this, sweetie...there are other ways to tell him you know about his porn stuff without telling him you looked at his e-mail. There's a little hidden file in Windows that you can peek at...you can just tell him you were cleaning up the computer to free up the memory or something (yes, I've dated lots of computer geeks and I work for a computer company). Hopefully things will get better...better to know now than when you're already married! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Dan and I are going through the exact same thing. I found a ton of e-mails from porn sites in his e-mail and he couldn't tell me why they were they kept coming to him. DUH, ass, you have to click on one site to get them to come to you. Then last week, I found a porn tape that he had that he said he had just found and was planning on throwing away when I wasn't in the house. He said he had no clue what was on it since it was just a blank tape so he had to watch it for 30 seconds to find out what it was then he turned it right off. YEA RIGHT - do you think I was born yesterday. Unfortunately it's a thing guys do. Don't get me wrong, I hate it and agree with you 100%, I just don't know how to change them. You should tell him you know because you'll feel alot better and he'll feel like an ass. |
| from artofliving : |
| OHHHH honey bunny!! I know EXACTLY what you mean!! from the unfortunate discovery to the checking of the e-mail. why do we do this to ourselves, love? I am really really proud of you for being so strong about this but you will eventually have to confront him, i think. I worry that not discussing what you know may hurt you more in the end...that's what almost ended things with me and Ddot. Smooches, honey. Let me know if oyu need anything. |
| from clarity25 : |
| I understand why you feel the way you do about the porn and adult websites. I would feel the exact same way. In the beginning of my relationship with Eric, I discovered something similiar. He shared it with me and we talked it out, I expressed that it bothered me a bit and made me feel insufficient and unattractive, like I wasn't enough. He respected that, and as long as he makes me a part of it..it wouldn't be a problem. I really hope everything works out. There's alot of ways of looking at it..Men can be so sex-driven and needy, they seek out all sorts of outlets. I guess it's all in how you see it, but you're entirely entitled to feeling the way you do. Hope things start looking up, you're in my thoughts. |
| from goingloopy : |
| Hi. I just discovered you....here's a weird tidbit. My best friend is a DMB freak. So she sends me this "what DMB song are you" quiz. I was "Grey Street." I had not heard the song until that quiz, and now it's one of my favorites....especially the part you quoted in one of your entries. |
| from betchy : |
| i love bizarre dreams, although the bits about your mum and dad being poorly are not so good! |
| from spoildangelz : |
| Thanks for the note...I'm very excited and worried at the same time! :-) Anyway, good-luck with the whole engagement process and let us know what happens! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| last night i IM'ed my ex and well.. i was retarded and then wrote about my ex and how we never got closure yadad yada how he still wants me... i read it this morning and just shook my head and deleted what was there! SORRYT!!! I alsmot didnt go back into my diary but then my memory came back and i was like OH SHITTTTT I wrote an entry last night, with pete and another friend sitting on the couch next to me.. woops!!! |
| from betchy : |
| hi thanks for adding me! you are too sweet! i have read a little bit of your diary, and you are just too cute. i look forward to reading more x |
| from clarity25 : |
| Sounds like you had an awesome night, candlelight, wine, and great sex. Glad things are looking up. If you send me your E-mail address, I can send you my pic so you know what I look like..Don't want you to feel left out:) [email protected]. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| that is soo awesome!!! and if we ever hang out.. no real names... i will call you singlegirl (not so) and you can call me jennlynn.. even though i know your real name (wink wink).. glad you had a great weekend and mind blowing sex.. you go girl! :) and you dirty girl going to wokr all sexed up.. lol :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| It could always be worse, ya know? That doesn't mean that your problems are trivial though because they aren't. I wouldn't be able to stand living with Jeremy either. Both of you are in the relationship, both of you live in the house, both of you use electricity and so on. You are his girlfriend, not his sugar mama. Make him shape up. It's the only way that you won't end up resenting him. |
| from pixie-grl : |
| Well, being that I work in a primarily male dominated business, female co-workers run few and far between. The only other female that works with me that has any "say", works as the office manager upstairs. She doesn't deal with the people downstairs as often. I know I shouldn't let it get to me, but it does. I take things very personally and to heart. I am slowly learning why people act the way they do though. I just need to work on my tough exterior. lol |
| from pixie-grl : |
| A few things actually... First and foremost, I would like to thank you for adding me to your buddy list. XOXO Secondly, you should know that your last entry really made me think and inspired me. It is so easy to put yourself down and think the worst. It isn't very often that I feel I can compliment myself, but you have made me realize that its okay to have a positive self image of yourself. Maybe that is what I have been lacking for so long. I look forward to catching up on your diary and hope you keep in touch! |
| from artofliving : |
| oh sweetnes...you are SO fabulous and the point is whether or not YOU are comfortable and happy with yourself. Perhaps Mister Man wasn't thinking heavily about all of that, but when you asked, his little brain got nervous and went into overdrive. you're fantabulous |
| from stillsingle : |
| Well, I guess Jeremy had 3 valid points...those are all of my reasons for wanting to lose about 10 or 15 pounds. I know I'll never be as think as I was in high school or anything, but I hate that I've settled into this frumpy weight. You are very beautiful and you should know that! At least you can change your weight...what can ugly people do? Spend thousands on plastic surgery? |
| from clarity25 : |
| I can understand why you feel self-conscious after that conversation about your weight and how that would affect your self-esteem. First of all, from the pictures you shared..you do not appear fat and I feel slightly angry that your guy thinks you are. But he was being honest and that's important in a relationship. It's just infuriating how our society..anyways, off topic. I relate because when I first came to Germany, I gained a bit of weight and Eric commented on my stomach one night..saying it was "like a pillow" and he teased me. I didn't sleep naked with him for a month and starved myself. I was so down about it. But that's not the route to go, It really depends on how you feel about yourself and I think you realize that you're beautiful. try not take what he said to heart or let it affect your sex life. That's what I did, and it sucked. Also thank you so much for the kind words you left in my notebox:) |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| i wish i couold im at work... i cant do anything but work at work now.. so my playtime will be at night. i def threw up at work this morning MANY times.. no drinking for me tonight.. heheheh ... i just ate lunch and i feel liike a new woman!!! :) see ya girl |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Ah the sweet days or adolescense. You should go to the frat party. Some of my best college experiences were at frat parties, not that I remember much besides going in random room after random room stealing beer and all the cute boys in Polos. I guess that wouldn't be much fun for you though. I mean since you are practically married. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| ill update this weekend.. INTERNET IS COMING MONDAY!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! so excited.. god help me i will do all types of whacked entries... thanks liz... i love the new layout and you and your man are hot biatches!! and guess what, HE IS LUCKY TO HAVE YOU!!! Love ya girl!!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I love the new layout. So cute. And I'm glad that you and Jeremy had sex. Even if it was during a commercial break. Thanks for the compliments. I'm still carrying a few extra pounds but oh well!! Have a great weekend! |
| from beautyx3 : |
| like the new layout, and cute pics! |
| from clarity25 : |
| P.S. Happy belated birthday! |
| from clarity25 : |
| I love your layout, Also thanks for sharing the photos. You're truly beautiful, you're both a cute couple and Jeremy is a hottie. Geez, what's up with everyone on Diaryland looking like models! I'm getting a complex here... |
| from stillsingle : |
| Oh my god, you are SO beautiful! You and Jeremy make a very attractive couple! He's HOT girl! Actually you look a LOT like my brother's ex, my nephew's mom. Sorry to hear about the camping trip...mosquitos suck! MN is always in fested with them, blech! I'm going to have to get a gold membership, so I can post photos, too. Thanks for sharing! |
| from spoildangelz : |
| Awww....you guys are such a cute couple! |
| from jess1976 : |
| You guys make a very attractive couple. I love being able to place a face with a diary! Yea for gold memberships! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Your hair was gorgeous!! I always wanted my hair to grow long and look like that, too bad it doesn't!! Grow it out!! You could be in Pantene commercials. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| BEAUTIFUL. i KNEW it :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Gold Memberships are fun, huh? I don't know why you are always worried about your weight, you are beautiful!! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| finally a pic to go with the entries.. your a hot mama :) have a good night! ya gold membership!!! |
| from beautyx3 : |
| Happy Birthday. Hope your camping weekend goes well. I'm sure it will! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Happy Birthday! Hope you get everything you wanted! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Happy Birthday! Hope you have a great camping trip too!!! |
| from jess1976 : |
| Happy Birthday! Hope you have a great camping trip too!!! |
| from soverycherry : |
| Happy birthday, yay! You're exactly one month behind me, three behind my sister, and seven behind my dogs! We love the 23rd at our house! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| HAPPY BIRTHDAY! |
| from jemimap : |
| It is really quite scary how like mine your thinking is. I've not been here for a while, so I was just doing a bit of catching up. I hope the email thing is a bit more sorted out now. It didn't sound like an email from a friend-friend, but then again I have a male friend who writes stuff like that and is really touchy-feely in real life, but there's nothing more than a good friendship between us. I've never had access to my boys stuff - mostly 'cause we've spent a lot of time in different countrys - but I'm not sure I'd want to. I think I'd get too paranoid. There've been a couple of occasions since we got together that have made me think not-so-trusting thoughts. When he wrote in one of the open Diarys here about a sexual encounter with someone else I wasn't sure I could ever get past that. I certainly didn't want to be near him or have him touch me. He's done a lot to enforce our relationship but it sometimes seems safer to hold back a little with the trusting. It's kind of like a self-protection thing. If you think it might happen then if it does it will hurt less. I do try not to think that way, but well, getting hurt really... hurts! I'm sure it'll all turn out fine, so I'll stop rambling at you now. :) |
| from justagal : |
| I live in St. Louis and can give you all kinds of info. There is a lot to do here, and there's also The Lake of the Ozarks which is 2 1/2 hours west of here. Just let me know if you want info. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh the Notebook is the best movie ever! I can't wait to get it on DVD. I love Ryan Gosling. He's so hot. And the new movie with Denise Richards looks good. Dean Cain is kind of a cheeseball. Oh well. She had a baby six months ago and she looks amazing!! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| hey you, can youdo me a favor and feel me in on what happens in today's oprah? i'm on campus all day and have no one to tape it for me. haha ... im a glutton for punishment. i love watching others get what i want... |
| from lonelyblues : |
| Aw darlin', you're so lucky! I hope the camping trip is a blast...I love camping myself. I just wanted to check in and say thank you for adding me to your faves:) Take care-I'll check back soon.. |
| from clarity25 : |
| thanks for your supportive note during my pregnancy scare:) That meant alot to me. I just read your last 2 entries,It's good that you confronted him about the E-mail, I'm so sorry that things are so difficult right now. I would be feeling the same emotions as you and be very distant and cold for a while. It's completely understandable. I hope things work out in the long run, that you can learn to trust him again and things with your relationship improve:). |
| from jess1976 : |
| I'm glad you confronted Jeremy.... it sounds like you feel a bit better. I would be EXACTLY like you, I would still have a hard time trusting. I would still be checking the e-mail and phone records as well...it so hard to not do it once you realize you have the necessary tools to obtain the information. Once I found out that I had the password to the Cingular account and that I could check to see who Dan was calling, I became obsessed. I still check on occassion, but not as much. It's not as interesting when there's nothing to hide. Dan just recently said to me too, when I told him I knew where he was going on the Internet, that he didn't care and if he had anything to hide, he wouldn't give me access to his computer, his e-mail account or his cell phone. Hopefully you will start to meet some of Jeremy's friends soon. I remember my ex-boyfriend never let me meet any of his friends... for 3 years it was like that. I began to feel like he was embarrassed of me. I never figured out what it was... but like I said, if it were me... I'd push to meet his friends, because if you're anything like me, you will worry about the reasons why you're not meeting them. Good Luck |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm glad to hear that you and Jeremy cleared up the email situation. I think you should definately try to meet his friends soon!! Thanks for the note. I think that Griffin does look like me. Most people say he does. Of course most people have never seen Mike so the only person that he can look like is me. Anyways I'll post more pictures soon!! Have a great weekend! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Wow, sorry to hear about the e-mail. Trust is so important in a relationship...it can easily destroy it. You have to know within yourself if you can go on with him and continue to trust him. For me, it's never the same once something like that happens...friends from the ex or to the ex, cheating, calls from girls, etc. It always puts that doubt in the back of your mind. Hopefully this really is nothing and you can move on, without checking his e-mail every 5 minutes. Nobody deserves to feel like this. |
| from clarity25 : |
| You have EVERY right to be upset about that E-mail. I would be feeling a rush of emotions from sadness, to anger, to pain. In a situation like this, the best thing to do is confront him. Maybe you could start by just asking him if he's seeing someone on the side or if he has a significant relationship with another girl. Tell him how honesty is the most important part of a relationship and you sense he's not being honest. If he doesn't confess or explain, the best thing to do is just be honest with him. Tell him you checked his E-mail and you found the letter. Tell him that you're hurting right now. He might get defensive and accuse you of violating his personal space. But just explain to him that you love him and you just want everything out in the open, right now. From there, It might be a bumpy road..or he'll explain everything and it wont be as bad as you anticipate. Good luck, you're in my thoughts. I really hope everything works out. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| i am "you" in such a way that i would FLIP THE FUCK OUT.. not to overreact.. but who is he to keep secrets and talk to someone like that. It is hard bc if you confront him, he will not trust you.. the trust would be blown.. but then again wshat you found out is fuckd up... or suspicious.. ya, hey sexy ladyu.. dont let it go on without sying something, or keep reading and be sneaky about it and find out enough info to tell him yuou found out from so and so that he is talking to this biatch.. lalala... oh girl.... sorry i am not making thinbg sbetter but i have been through this, i have been "jeremy" and fucked tghings up with relationships... you gotta do somethikng.. sorry for not being SOOTHINg baout it.. love ya girl.. email me if you want to vent more |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| ah.. you already know i'm one of those girls no one wants to be who checks her guy's emails.. and you also probably have an idea that i'm the type of person who can't stay cool and collected and "wait" for something even mroe incriminating to come along.. i always fess up immediately so i can confront him immediately BUT thats now how i would like to be.. i would wait for a reply.... to see... and then bring it up. he shouldn't be calling ANYONE sexy lady but you.. I remember doug called skankass "hot" in one of his emails and i flipped even though still till this day he says it's a nickname everyone has for her (down right lie).. but prepare yourself for him changing his email, getting a secret account, lying to your face about it with some outlandish excuse (the girl's really his mom or something)... i pray pray pray that if he's just innocently flirting that he will honestly admit that to you and stop it. i HOPE there's an explanation for this.. a valid one. good luck. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh. I would be upset about that email too. Please don't be one of those girls who makes excuses for him. You have every right to be upset. Don't ask him about it yet, wait until she replies and get more proof. I don't know how you are going to confront him unless you just come right out and confess to checking his email but he can't be mad at you for that. He shouldn't be hiding things especially now that you live together. Don't make his excuses for him and don't believe whatever he says either. It's shady as hell. Wait awhile and get as much proof as you can. If you confront him now he can lie but if you outright catch him saying or doing something in a following email then he can't. Good luck! |
| from justagal : |
| That email is total bullshit and I would confront him with it. If he gives you grief on why you were reading his email, tell him he only confirmed your worries. I'd give him a chance to explain, but I am telling you right now, if I found an email from my husband like that to another woman, he'd be staying at his parents house. From your postings, it's obvious he is crazy about you. I would confront him and get it off of your chest. Good luck- |
| from jess1976 : |
| I am an untrusting girlfriend and check the e-mail thing and internet history. Although, I have to say that with my boyfriend, Dan, he really has nothing to hide. Anyways, back to the subject... I would confront him and I would be pissed. You opened up your heart and home to him and you deserve respect. I don't think it's a good idea for guys to flirt with other girls even if they are friends because they give girls, like me (who are insecure), the wrong idea. If he's ready to propose to you, then he should be on the same page as you. Let him know that you read the e-mail and want to know what's going on... it's what you deserve! He should know that if you guys share a computer that you can have access to anything he does... it's really not that hard to comprehend. Just talk to him and lay it out on the line. Tell him how you think you should be treated. I hope it works out for the best for you!!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| That is embarrassing. He should have definately said something!! Like "Oh it's an old table not you", I mean at the very least. I hate worrying about my weight too. I've never had to before but now I have all this baby weight. It was coming off really fast and not it's not. I need to start on the treadmill. Oh yuck if only we didn't have to worry about that. Good luck though!! |
| from artofliving : |
| that's so crazy!! my boy is going about the engagement thing jsut like yours!! i wish i didn't know sometimes, too. absolutely awesome. congrats |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| How exciting!!!! ia m soo happy for you guys...... :) you better get a gold membership so when you are engaged we can see the ring and you too love birds!!! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| that is crazy about your dad.. but i can totally relate about the business man comment.. i think my parents would be THRILLED behyoind belief if i brought home a guy in a suit who works on wall street and makes a ton of money. but you know what. i dont want that. I dont like guys like that. Id rather live the way i live now, woithout being rich than to live a pseudo life.... hope you had a great weekend girl!! :) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| i do that too. justify not exercising or feel that ive exercise by doing things i enjoy like shopping and having sex haha. i figure, hey! i'm burning calories!.. i also take it so far as to count swinging my leg while i'm sitting a form of exercise and going to classes a form of exercise. i also feel you about how eating healthy is so damn expensive... and they wonder why we americans have a hard time eating right. |
| from krugerpak007 : |
| OMG. You HAVE to get him the camera! And then share with us! :-) I hope you feel better soon. xox Kathy |
| from stillsingle : |
| Ah, you're getting some of my leftover weather from MN! It was cold, cloudy and rainy for the past few days, now it's 77 and sunny, don't worry...it's coming! I know what you mean about the friend or lover thing. I've had that happen in almost every relationship. It's seems around the 1 year anniversary mark, you do get "comfortable" and less passionate, try to keep both...it's worth trying for. Like they say, relationships are work! |
| from clarity25 : |
| Thanks for the note, I can relate to what you wrote about your relationship with Jeremy, there are times when things with Eric and I start becoming too routine, we start feeling more like friends..or we're not as flirty and cute with eachother. He reaches out and I respond all grumpily. Sometimes there are ruts in our relationship too when things aren't quite so passionate, but it's like a rollercoaster..it goes up and down. Sometimes the smallest thing can trigger a "lovefest" when you see eachother again as you did in the beginning and get that tingly feeling in your stomach.. I can't believe your man celebrates every month anniversary..that's so sweet! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I completely feel ya on the friends/lovers thing.. sometimes they get all blurred together.... sometimes i feel like you do, some days i think of pete as just a friend, other days as my lover.. i think shaking up the routine will do wonders for a relationship. or go away together, that always makes the blurriness go away!! i am going away next week to the beach with pete and its a well needed break from everyone and everything and just gonna be him and me. i think you and jeremy should.... even if it is an hour away! Love ya! have a great day! hope your ankle gets better soon! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Gross about the finger.... blah..... i love boats... My parents have a pontoon boat... a.k.a a party boat.... :) |
| from cdghost : |
| randomly found your words and i was glad too |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Gatorade is the miracle juice. It makes you feel like a new woman! :) Have great time at your lil parteeee tonight! :) Wish I lived closer, id pop on by!! :) Well I am off tommorow... so Have a great weekend! :) Keep smiling girl! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I am soooo like you. I never know what to say with new people or people I dont know very well. I will stand there staring into space not knowing anything and being mute. I cant strike up "So hows the weather" cliches.. I just cant. I am the worst.. But gettign worked up over a book club, c'mon now girl :) Hehehe Have a great day! :) |
| from stillsingle : |
| LOL!! That is too funny, but it happens to the best of us! Remember that SATC episode where Carrie farts in bed with Mr. Big? Anyway, cheer up, it could be worse, he still loves ya! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| you crack me up. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Honestly you crack me up so bad!! :) HA!!! It happens girl.. sure it wasnt You quiffing(ew is that how you spell it? ) ew, ok i cant believe I am now typing this. Too funny! you two are so cute together. I cant imagine getting drunk with you. wed be so obnoxious together! :) I want to see pics of you guys.. damn it :) My weekend was bleh too, if that makes you feel better... |
| from girlygirl83 : |
| Hey, I really like reading you! I just added you to my favorites. I hope that you don't mind. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Ah the days of drinking wine and smoking cigarettes, I wonder if I will ever have those days again. I was hoping to spend a nice evening out in early September but now that I am breastfeeding, that just doesn't seem right. I think that there are ways around it, I am just not sure what they are. Anyways I am a tan juckie too but the difference is it is absolutely killing me that I am not tan this summer. Oh well there is always next year. As for the engagement just wait and see what happens. He may surprise you! |
| from clarity25 : |
| Hi again, Thanks for adding me as a fav. I did the same. I truly love your writing, your previous entry touched me. Your first paragraph particularly. Thanks for reading my random experiences too and caring. That means alot to me..What you were saying is true. You know we always think that a change of environment is what we need to have new experiences and enjoy life. But really, whereever you go in life, there you are. So just making the most of each moment is the important things, and trying new things. I had made a pact to myself that I was going to try one new thing everyday that I ordinarily wouldn't do. Just one thing, sometimes it's a small thing..like trying a new sandwich or walking a different way to work..etc. Okay, I'm rambling. I also wanted to say that I relate with you on the job complaints. I work so hard and make so little money. It's frustrating at times, even though I know that's not what's important. It's just so hard to keep the right perspective when your down to 50 euros for the next two weeks.. Also, Eric and I spent a night reading sex stories on the internet..it was fun, and kind of erotic. Good luck with the cook out! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Hey wait, Walt was at my house last night too! :) He got me all sorts of giggly :) Heheh ...You rock girl! I am sure you had some good relations with jeremey... You have said in the past that Walt spices up da luuuuuvvv making :) hehehhe.. (Walt... Ahh good old Walter...) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| you're amazing. your writing and honesty. completely amazing. i'm in awe of you. I relate to you too.. about traveling without having to really travel. i tried to expand my horizons this summer by incorporating new things in my life as well.. cooking.. reading.. etc. here are some new things, everday things to try out if you haven't already: brazilian wax, get a new pet, run a marathon, hot wax in the bedroom?, drive to another relatively near city for a day trip... i'll give you more later if you want |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Girl.. I feel the same way sometimes.. me=back in teh same town born and raised in.. i love to travel although i could never leave my fam and friends.. i want to go out and see the world too. .IT was funny our neighbor Dave last night said that he could get a job in Indy.. But then he said "why would I want to move to Indianapolis? When everything I have is here".... Makes ya think... Go for a road trip.. Go for an adventure (Are we 5? heheh) Just by changing your routine a little bit will show tremendous differences in both of your and jeremys lives... Go Get some Wine and Go Get Some Cigarettes (even though you have been doing so well)...Go for yours. You only live once. Why waste it on stagnant routine. Love ya girl! :) |
| from clarity25 : |
| Hi, Thank you so much for your sweet note, and compliment. I came to check out your diary and I instantly related with you. You're so honest and real in your writings, there are things you expressed that I feel too, but can't seem to find the right words. You describe your impressions of experiences so well, alot better than I do. I tend to describe more of the events that occur in my life and less how I felt about them. That was an amazing story with your boss and susan. I can only imagine how surreal that must have been. Also, I'm trying to stop smoking..well, I have been thinking about it for a while now. But when I drink, I can't help it. Well there's more I can comment on, but I have to get back to work. I'm glad you found me through Jennlynn..(she's awesome, isn't she?) and I'll be back to read more! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry about your trip. I know those airplane seats are tiny! I'm not a very big person, but I even get uncomfortable in those things. That is very freaky about your friend. I believe in stuff like that, and I'm sure your boss wouldn't have lied to you, nor had any reason to. Maybe Susan was using your boss as a way to communicate to you? Was anything done to her boyfriend that killed her? I hope so. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I think that is the most incredible thing ever.... it would freak me out, but also make me a complete believer. I had a friend *and ex* who died 2 years ago, tragically... i cant even imagine if my boss or anyone told me they could see my friend... freaky shit! Thats amazing though, Why are your friends so ignorant to not achnolige Susans existance? that is just wrong. your right, if i died (knock on wood) i would want everyone to talk about me, and to mourn me, and to celebrate my life as i lived on earth... Wow girl, let me know what your friends say :) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| oh my goodness... ! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| the trip practically has your name written all over it! if you're that paranoid, call the airline and ask. anonymous... but seriously, your name is all over it. and you sound like you need to get away for a bit. it's a perfect opportunity :) perfect. take it. |
| from appellation : |
| Another diarist (sweet-cynic) mentioned you so I decided to check out your journal. Glad I did! I thoroughly enjoyed it. I mentioned you in the entry before my most recent one, if you feel like checking it out. Ciao! |
| from horseshoes : |
| You can call the airline and ask about the seating. No one would ever know. Smaller planes have larger seats and they are cheaper too. Check it out. I have a friend that has the same problem and he flys all of the time. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Girl, You need to stop being so hard on yourself..... You are beautiful outside (I am sure!!)and a beautiful person inside... Dont punk out on the trip.. Just dont do it. You only live once.. Dont let an insecurity get the best of you. You are an amzing person, love ya! :) keep ya head up ;) |
| from stillsingle : |
| I'm so glad you guys worked things out. Don't let money come between you, too many people do. I remember the only time my ex and I would fight about money is when he wanted to compare to see if he made more than me (which he never did). I don't get men. But Jay was very responsible when it came to money. I'd put that on his "pros" list. :) |
| from stillsingle : |
| Here's something to think about: half of all marriages end in divorce and 90% are divorced over money problems. If you don't have these worked out soon, I would think twice about marrying somebody this irresponsible. If that were me, I'd be really frustrated. God help you, girl! We all need it! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| hah i was going to vent about doug's and i's money thing as well. doug coming from a rather wealthy family who pays for his rent/car/etc.... mooches off of me sooo much lately.. i drive him everywhere.. he eats up ALL my grocerries.. seriously sometimes i don't even get a taste of what i buy because he eats it all and i can't speak up for myself in this matter without feeling like a NAG/BITCH.. he spoils my apartment (my couch is now upside down in my living room because he broke a leg of the couch for 3 weeks now) it's just all making me feel very anti-sex as well. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Holy fucking shit girl.. YOU ARE ME!! I AM YOU!!! JEREMEY IS PETE>. every negative thing you said about J is how Pete is.. Imcompetent about money, feels like we have to be their "mothers" What do they spend their money on? Stupid shit! pete spends all of his money on food (every meal he "eats out".. thats like uh 30 bucks or more a day.. HELLOOOO BRING YOUR OWN LUNCH TO WORK, Bring in breakfast. go food shopping..) and for the school thing.. Yes, pete keeps saying if he had money hed go back to school.. Where there is a will there is a way.. You got me all fired up now about Pete!!!! And the mone ything, ALL I EVER DO IS WORRY ABOUT MONEY... lat night for the first time in awhile pete bought me 2 beers.. only 2, but i felt bad becaus that is that much less that he will have.... he will binge on the money he gets when he gets his paycheck then the last 3-4 days he will be dirt broke.. cant go out, cant do anything, then i feel bad for him but it is his own fault. as for jeremy taking off work, going back to indy(?) and then the place being closed or whatever.... yah your right, its not bad luck, its CALLED LETS TRY PROPER PLANNING> dont drive 2 hours before confirming that the people you need to see will be there.... god, men are frustrating.. i feel like the mature and responsible one.. I ALWAYS have felt that way in ALL relationships.. It has to be how all men are, it just does...... I am not all about money eiether, but i want my husband to take me out to eat, not me paying for him when he has no money, or me paying half.. or us not even going out cause he doesnt have money.. god, i should have just written you an email.. i might later... this is too long, but i totally feel ya.. its retarded and frustrating... and it makes relationships so strained.. i dont want to have a lawyer/doctor boyfriend (whichi guess wouldnt be bad) but i also dont want a paycheck-to-paycherker.. ok i will stop before I am ahead! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Money drives me nuts too. I can't handle the fact that Mike has done nothing for the baby. I just think that men suck at this point. You are completely right though, Jeremy needs to grow the fuck up!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Good luck with the smoking thing!! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| muhahahha. that was great.. the awful sex bit. i'm mean to doug too when he screws up (no pun intended). i usually go "you got to be kidding me?" |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| you called the landlord on your own party? why cause you wanted everyone out? heheheh... girl, i get EXACTLY EXACTLY the way you do when you drink..... It is scary! If i am at my apt chilling with a bunch of peeopl and i am too drunk, i walk towards the bathroom like i am going to pee, and then go right to the bedroom without passing out.. that is actually my trademark.... and i usually get "that drunk" at bars and we have to leave bc i am too drunk and whiny....and need to pass out... it happens! :) your lil sex thing didnt sound like too much fun, ya i wouldnt want to jump on the sex bandwagon real soon after either.... i feel like you always say you are pmsing, is this true? LOL... i think you are great girl, if i lived by you, we'd so be buddies and be "those girls" ha! :) |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| you are too funny.. thats girl, i know i know.... not tactful at all., why would she say that? She is a big woman herself... :) I am obsessed with Simple Life as well, too bad I missed it last night.. Ever find out what happened with the van outside? So jeremy is sick now? Pete is too. I am the same way you are... Dont get me sick!!!! :) i am outta here soon, thank god tommorow is friday! :) Your apartment sounds really put together, Can you take pics of it? Do you have gold member status? :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| The Simple Life is hilarious but I think that they are done taping this season. I bet it's a promotional thing. It would be fun to hang out with those girls but I doubt I could keep up!! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Hey, no worries girl!! I remember your entries about your eye!!! it hurst like a bitch.. i can now feel the pain you were going through!! So what else is new.. I need updates.. about jeremy, work, the apartment, any upcoming trips.... hehehe :) Hope ya have a great day! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I hope that things start looking up soon. The green wall sounds neat. I am sure that your apartment will end up looking great. As for Target furniture, I love it. It's so cute. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Sorry to hear about your uncle, how old was he? At least he's no longer suffering. Good luck with the move. Hopefully you'll have good weather for it! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm really sorry. Your family, especially your grandparents, are in my thoughts and prayers. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I am sooo excited for you guys!!! :) I think everything will look great and you are sooo freaking lucky you havea fireplace...... your diary is f-ed up because when i go to "older" it is all this mumbo jumbo about codes and formatting.. check it out.. oh and also, being hungover does constitute eating everything in sight.. you deserved it... congrats on the 4 pounds (lets forget about yesterday, right?!!! HA!) you go girl! |
| from kandeelee : |
| hey nice page..u got here.. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Cheer up girl, life isnt that bad, now is it?!! I tell ya, if you ever take a road trip.. . Jersey baby.. its not what they say it is ... :) Tommorow will be better and well, turkey ruebens are YUMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) Have a great day! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I love Wilmington! I would go if I were you. I've thought about moving to Kentucky to help with my grandfather because my nana does it by herself but there is nothing there for me. I couldn't start a career there at all. It doesn't sound weird to me that your parents help you with bills so do mine and I'm moving home too. Plus they are going to have to help so much with the baby. What a pain I must be. Oh well. I hope that I am as helpful to Griffin as my parents have been to me. I hope that I can afford to be at some point in my life. Anyways go, it would be awesome. If I weren't having a baby, I would totally be on my way to North Carolina. I love it there. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Yeah Charlize was pretty scary in Monster. I mean ew. I can't believe that she can look that bad. I think it would suck to have to gain 30 pounds right away for a movie but at the same time she probably got over a million dollars for that movie and she probably does have a cook and a personal trainer so yeah it's not too shabby a deal. I just wouldn't want to do it too terribly often. It would have to be a very special role. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| what's your medication? are you peeing still frequently urinating because you're drinking more or because of your UTI? because even with my worst UTI, after i've taken the first 2 days worth of medication, the frequency decreases... and they always give me macobid ( 3 different doctors) |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| blah.. gotta make an appointment today- i'm now peeing blood! no, it's not recommended you have sex while on the antibiotics. sorry, kid. i feel your pain. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I've a UTI before, they suck! The only thing that took care of it was antibiotics and these little magic orange pills that took the pain away. Good luck, suck up the cranberry juice and lots of water, too! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| funny i was JUST thinking. i think i have uti again... i dont even know if it's been a full month since my last one. going home after this and drinking lots of cranberry juice too. i hate it. I feel your pain... again. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| fish sticks? blahh.. actually i have never had them... id opt for manwiches, those are my fave!!! :) ooh where are you looking for color schemes? I want to paint.. we are not allowed to, but i want to anyways.... i am super bitch on my period too.. then again i can be super bitch all teh time... Ill drink a martini for ya (s l o w l y) he he ..... :) have a great day girl! ooh if you ever email me, i am trying to get off of the yahoo name, so i have my old email account [email protected]... hit me up sometime....... |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I just have to hope that you are right. I know that the big picture can't be as bad as this but it's hard to accept this. I just can't seem to move on. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I really want to see mean girls...good stuff, right?!!! i hear ya with you are already sick of barbeques... as much as i love cheesburgers, hot dogs, and beer... i dont think my body likes it..i am going to be a house this summer if i keep up with all my barbeques!! :) well its beautiful outside.. and this weekend should be great as well... Talk to you soon!! Have a great day! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Oh and thanks for the note yesterday. I do adore the baby. I've been trying to think what he could do that would make me turn away from him but I can't imagine anything so I hope that they do feel the same way. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I'm not tired of the hot dog/hamburger thing yet but it does get old by July. Oh well. There are a million other things about the summer to love, I guess. It sounds like you guys had a fun weekend! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| very adorable entry. very. |
| from savecraig : |
| How could anyone get sick of mayonaise based products?!?!?! I can't imagine it! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| aw girl, you are beautiful inside and out.. keep up that positive attitude... |
| from jess1976 : |
| I'm going to Walsh College and they offer online classes, it's not a complete online program. I do like to go in and take a class from time to time, so I don't think I could do the whole program online. University of Phoenix is a pretty popular business school for those who work full time and go to school at night. At this point, I think if you get your master's degree... that's worth alot! I'm not so sure that all companies are really looking at what school you went to. Good Luck! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Everyone likes Le Cirque better but I can't decide. I like the Barn one too. I guess I'll figure it out soon enough. I'm glad that you think that things will be okay. I only hope that they will. Thanks for the note. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I hope that your weekend went well, it sounds like you needed some time to yourself. I always manage to look like shit at work and it sucks because I feel awful the whole day if I look bad. I can't help it though, there are just some days when it doesn't seem appealing to get up early to shower and put makeup on. Just another reason it sucks to be a girl. |
| from stillsingle : |
| Hi, just catching up on reading, I haven't had time to in so long! Living with someone is a lot fun and stressful, too. I really hope it works out for you, it didn't with the two guys I have lived with, but ya never know! I'd still do it before I married anyone. Take care! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I emailed you, let me know if you don't get it. I emailed [email protected]. I'm doing well though. I thought you had the password, sorry. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| nice, nice!! now i see what you do, I realized you worked for a non profit company but didnt put any correlation into what you really do .... cool man! you are too cute with the mushy notes to jeremy.. girl, you are awesome man.. i feel like i can relate totally... if you ever in jersey... :) (oh and i drinking my second beer... woops!!! oh well, waiting for real world at my old roomies place "chilling") ooh and guess what.. had sex again.. LOL! have a great night (or morning or afternoon when you read this!!) ~Jenn~ |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| your right though... i'll grow out of it.. its just... a social thing... the complex i live in, everyone hangs out.. drinks some beers, just chills out.. it seems like there is always a reason to drink.. i just have to learn my limits... i feel like i had more control in college, wait.. no i am lying... :)also, i used to be like 2 beers into drinking "lets have sex" even 6 beers.. now its like, we all hang out, or whatever.. and then the opportunity doesnt arrise.. i typically dont just drink with pete i drink with a bunch of people..plus, i think i am a party girl in heart :) also pete and i arent mushy, lets get it on in front of people type of thang...so living with jeremy is going well?! get some pics up on there!!!! :)hey, what do you do for a living anyways? til 8 tonight? YUK!! id die of hunger.. my body is like clockwork.. 12:00 lunch everyday.. by 4:00 i am hungry for dinner, i get home at 530 and GORGE! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I like the new template!! Oh and Mean Girls is so cute, you guys will have so much fun! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| ooh i like the new look.... :) |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| no tours this summer :( i just checked the website.... they are amazing in concert.. good karaoke music too!! :) yes he was sooo great though!! i like john mellancamps music too, that is pretty cool!! :) Is it as hot in Indiana today as it is in Jersey? It is like 80 degrees!! : ) i want to go HOME!!!! ;) how are things working out living with jeremy? any stories? |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW HARD I WAS LAUGHING IN MY CUBE AT WORK.. People are walking by like WHATS UP WITH YOU... seriously.. that is the funniest thing about the mcdonalds cup (GROSS FUNNY>. like who says that and does that, and acts like that... oh my god Girl, you crack me up!!!) and no you didnt sound snotty.... at least they feel comfortable around you... do they live in the boonies? i still laughing cause i know what type of people they sound like.... :) Sorry, i just cant stop laughing... i cant imagine your face, what if you were in a "nice" restaurant.. ha.. i guess her story was appropriate at mcdonalds.... man, thanks girl! have a great night! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I completely agree.. why tell stupid ass lies when you know that someone is going to find out. its better to be pissed off at first with the truth, then find out later and feel real dumb and naive.. ya know! well good luck with the move!!!I know how nervous I was about moving in with Pete... if you never take that chance, you never know!! (like when you found that box of jeremys...)Plus, I believe that you need to know if you are compatible to live with the person, before you get married....were your parents cool with the move? I feel like I soo know you... very strange!! :) Good luck girlie!! if you ever have any questions.... im in the same boat |
| from stillsingle : |
| Good luck with the move. I'm not sure if you've ever lived with anyone, but it changes everything. Jay and I were together for a year, thought for sure we'd get married and have a family and be in our house forever, well...not even a year later we broke up. Moving in with someone is a true test of your relationship...I hope it goes well for you two! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I don't think that you should be that worried. I have boxes of stuff from David and Ian. They were a big part of my life and it's fun to look back on the letters and pictures. I still have pictures of them on bulletin boards too. I think the bigger deal would be if he didn't. Sure he lied but he thought that you would be upset. I think when people destroy things from their exes, it's kind of showing that they still do care and can't handle the memories. We all lie, don't let this one bother you too much. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I love football too! I can't wait for August. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the note. I think that the saying in Riding in Cars with Boys is very true. I should have listened more closely or watched the movie more closely when I saw it. I think that you are right, that it's all about perception but I can't help but think that this is the worst thing that ever happened, I mean I honestly think that it has ruined my life. I don't really feel like life is worth living anymore. I miss me. I try to have faith that God will get me through this but time and time again I start doubting him. I just don't know how to make this right again. I want my life back, I feel like I'm living someone else's nightmare!! Thanks for leaving me a note though, it made me feel better. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| wait... i am sititng at my cube cracking the FUCK up over your story.. I think we are the same person, oh my god.... cracking the fuck up!!! well when the wine spilled, everyone stopped what they were doing and everyone said i was cut off... clearly i was not drunk (in my eyes, i really Wasnt.. im just a clumsy ass) and quickly asked for another glass.... after i got the wine out of my eye and wiped off my smeared mascara.... god, still laughing about your story..... ;) I tend to spill at least one thing when i go out.. my friend bob says that i either "hurt, burn, dirty or spill" on myself or others... |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Cabin Fever is one of the worst movies ever!! EW. It's so gory!! We went to the theatre to see it and almost walked out! I hope Jeremy gets that job! That would be great! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you guys! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| my most favorite article of clothing is FLIP FLOPS!! your place sounds awesome!!! that is too funny about her not remembering.. never the less TELLING YOU!! hysterical!!!...Is indianapolis warm this time of year? lucky biatch!! :) Oh and hope ya find something fun to do this weekend!! I am the same way, i get bored of the same old shit... real easily.... boozing it up for me tongiht and tommorow.. god life is hard!! :) Have a great weekend! :) |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| oh god girl, you crack me up!! OOh i guess my code word for "porch activities" isnt a hard code to crack!! Lol!! When i "porch" it up, i get soo jumpy.. he'll touch me and all i can do is giggle and squirm.. its like that episode with ross and rachel... and ross keeps touching her butt or trying to kiss her and she just laughs.. thats me..thanks girl.. you do sound like an advice column in Cosmo..... I know... I feel like he takes more initiative.. i do love sex....He makes me feel sexy, I dont know what it is.... it seemes like always an excuse.. he used to want to jump my bones like all the time, but now he is always tired too.... I'll let ya know how those pills work.. apparently it is all herbal... so.. who knows... it sounds like the same thing that something like esctasy would do (weird... but i went to the hospital bc of that drug!! BAD!!) but we will see. i will keep ya informed... thanks cosmo girl!! :) Your hair sounds really cute!!! :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| The mole is the new twist on the Bachelor but she's a friend of his and not a real contestant so she's not competing. It should lead to some interesting developments. |
| from soverycherry : |
| Your haircut sounds so cute! My friend Callie actually went to the salon equipped with that issue of Cosmo with Julia Stiles on the cover to get her haircut - I love that style. Also, you can TOTALLY wear cute hats with short hair! I think it's a lot cuter than long hair, for sure! |
| from stillsingle : |
| I straightended my hair in 10th grade and the same thing happeneded...chunks of hair started falling out! I've learned to love my curly hair and only straighten it with a blowdryer and flat iron when I do straighten it. I did cut my hair super short when I turned 21 because I thought it would be more "grown up"...I just don't have the face for short hair so I ended up growing it out...you may learn to love it. Hope it works out! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I know its not funny.. but it made me laugh.. bc i was thinking what i would do... i hate getting my hair cut,. my hair is sooo thin and fine.. so i cant do much to it.. i wanted a change and had my friend cut my hair like 4 months ago, my hair is nasty now.. split ends up the wazoo.. i tried to cut bangs at work bc there were split ends... and well. now i have a chunk of short hair on one side of my head. i am getting a haircut after work.. ya one of those 10.00 hair cuts..... gotta do it. .i am sure your hair looks cute, you sound like an awesome person.. and that jeremy of yours.. AHHH perfection.. :) lol |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Don't feel bad, I would freak out if anything happened to my hair too!! Especially if it started falling out and stuff. Think panic attack for me. As for the partially curly/partically straight stuff. I have that too. I always have. I have thick hair too, my stylist says that I have two heads of hair and that is why it grows different ways. I love my hair though. It's always been dark and I love being a brunette. Just cut it short and try again next time, it's all you can do. Oh and sorry your weekend wasn't great. Mine wasn't either, I wonder if they even exist these days!! Have a great week! |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| Broad Ripple does sound like a cute lil artsy town!! ya, dont walk home alone, especially drunk.. lol!! i think you can spring for the 3 bucks... and well, i agree with you on the sex thing... it dwindles.... not intentional... just it seems like there is less opportunity or you get used to the other person, or excuse..excuse... lol :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| You should never walk home alone!! It's so scary. When I was in college and lived on campus, I was always terrified of walking home alone!! Stay in groups, you know the spill. Anyways I am sure Jeremy would not be pleased to hear that you did that. Be safe this weekend and have fun, sorry about the period thing but hey it's way better than being pregnant!! |
| from stillsingle : |
| There are 3 major credit companie out there that will run a credit report for you for a small fee. I run mine once every 3 years or so, just to make sure I have no open lines of credit hanging around because that will affect your score. When I bought my house 2 years ago, my beakon rating was so high, the mortage lady said she'd never seen it that high before, not to brag, but I have excellent credit. If you ever need advice, let me know. Try www.Equifax.com for your credit report, you can enter it all on their website and they will e-mail you or mail you your report. Good luck! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW *sigh* he sounds perfect. *knock on wood* |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Yeah, Under the Tuscan Sun was okay. I just expected it to be better. I like Diane Lane though. As for the drinking thing, I don't think that there is anything wrong with it all. It's fun. I just don't want to be stuck in that place when I am 30. There has to be more to life than that scene, ya know? I just wish I had realized it sooner. |
| from jennlynn24 : |
| I didnt think those type of guys existed., Hold onto that one!! You dont find guys like that around anymore.. I am glad you are over the Ben thing... Jeremy seems like THE PERFECT guy! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Jeremy sounds wonderful. Yay. Anyways it's just bizarre that he got those two movies because I rented the exact same ones last weekend at the movie store. I didn't like either of them, did you? |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Parents always seem to manage to make us feel like we are failing them. I don't know why they would want to do that but they do without even knowing that. Maybe you should be upfront with your parents and just tell them that their negative isn't helping you. Parents never realize that we are adults too and we know just as much about what is going on as they do. I'm sorry that they make you feel bad, just try and surround yourself with positivity. I have my BA in Sociology and Business and I make plenty of money. They shouldn't look down on you for your degrees, the person that you are is just as important to a company as what you majored in four years ago. Keep your chin up! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the notes, I have a lot going on in my personal life right now and it's all become a big mess and a big headache. I am just trying to adjust right now and look at the positive side of things although most of the time I can't find the positive stuff. I hope that it's true and everything does happen for a reason. Boys always make rude comments, they don't know that it bothers us and they don't think before they speak. He's crazy about you and he thinks that you are wonderful. Remember those things. We are a lot harder on ourselves than men are. He loves you for who you are, you should too. Good luck!! Thanks for thinking of me too!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| All guys look at other girls, we look at other guys too. Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean you can't appreciate beauty. Besides he's with you because he wants to be, if he didn't want to be then he wouldn't be. It's that simple. Try not to get upset about him looking at other girls, he could be doing a lot more than looking at them and he's not. Besides insecurity is unattractive in girls and boys so don't be so insecure. He likes you, he wants to be with you, that is all you need to know. You have a lot to offer, don't worry about it. If you question why he is with you then eventually he will too. Just a thought. I am glad that you guys got back on track though. I hope that you start getting more secure in the relationship and realize that you can't stress about the small things. It'll all work out!! |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| that last entry got me. i feel you, you know he loves you and thinks you're hot but it shatters your confidence when he says things like that best ass comment. my boyfriend does that too, he'd say things like "so and so has great hooters (when mine are barely an A" and then he'll expect to grope my A puppies and expect groping my malnurished boobs to be FOREplay to SEX... i call it foot in mouth- they don't mean anything by it.. but still, you want to smack them upside the head everytime theys ay stuff like that. My favorite one of all time is "Linda, did you drink water just now?.. no? it just looks like you downed like 4 glasses." punkass. |
| from sweet-cynic : |
| hey babe! thank you for the note! notes from new people make my day. i've been reading your journal off and on as well and i remember even telling doug about one of your entries a while back.. the one about your vibrator cutting your boyfriend's penis. heheh. but i feel you about being alone. when i'm feeling down, i realy really hate being by myself. i often fantasize what i'd be like if i had like 3 great GIRL friends whom i did everything with and who i could rely on for the interventions. Similar to the friends briget jones had haha. but then i realized a lot of my current friends would help me out if i just ask... reaching out is half the battle i guess. |
| from stillsingle : |
| I wouldn't fret it. All relationships go through this at the end of the honeymoon phase. You're now starting to look past all the wonderful things about this person and starting to notice the not so wonderful things. The questions is, can you both deal with them and are you both willing to compromise to not lose each other? It definately is a test for both of you. Hopefully everything will work out for you! Reading your diary is like watching my favorite soap like Bo and Hope on Days of our Lives, somehow they always manage to be togther because their love is just too powerful. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the note!! It really wasn't too much information, I need motivation and it sounds like those sites that you told me about could really help. I like eating low carb most of the time because it helps reduce water weight and I feel thinner automatically but then the cravings hit!! You seem to be doing great on it!! Help me stick to it, please!! I hope things are well with Jeremy!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I am so ready for spring too. It's been raining her for what seems like days and days and days. Will it ever stop? Don't worry about the Jeremy thing, sometimes people get on one another's nerves, it's only normal. Anyways way to go on the low carbs, I have tried it a million times and I just suck!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the note. I don't think I could get any kind of prescription drug because I'm not technically overweight, I just need to lose a few pounds here and there. Let me know if you learn anything about TrimSpa. Thanks!! and Good luck!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| What kind of diet pills do you take? I've never had much luck with them but I really need something to curb the hunger. I have never been one hundred percent comfortable being naked in front of anyone because I have stretch marks from being so tall and I just don't loke my ass, everything else is fine. I need to get more motivated to hit the gym. Anyways I can't imagine not having a traditional wedding either, I am determined to have one. That is great about the smoking thing, I have tried to quit numerous times. I only smoke when I drink though which is two nights a week so it's not as bad as it could be or used to be. Anyways good luck with everything!! |
| from tanprincess : |
| wow! it sounds like you had an awesome weekend! i can not believe that bonnie woman had the audacity to say those things to you! she was just jealous that you were getting your groove on and she wasn't!! anyway glad you had a great time!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I think your weekend sounds fabulous and I am sure that Jeremy loved his gifts as much as you loved yours. Thanks for the note, Chad really seems like a nice guy, I guess we'll see!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| The lady at your work sounds hilarious. Isn't it insane how someone's sense of fashion can just go right out the door with their age? I think that you will have a wonderful Valentine's Day!! Oh and that is so scary about what happened with you and your roomate. Cops suck. I really wouldn't put my life in their hands ever... |
| from tanprincess : |
| hey thanks for the advice about my cousin. i really think that you hit the nail on the head..she does need her self confidence boosted. she does not think she can make it w/ out a man and i just dont understand that!!! i am the complete opposite, i'm very independent and just wish she could open her eyes. but eventually something is going to have to give. i dont want her to hate me but i'm going to have to do something. thanks for the great advice and good luck w/ the wax and the great weekend w/ jeremy!! i enjoy reading your diary as well!!! THANKS! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I used to work at a spa when I was in college and I love getting bikini waxes then. I used to get the brazillian bikini wax but that cost $65 if you don't work there, it was only $10 for me. Anyways it's not that bad, you'll get paper panties to put on and it doesn't hurt too much. Take a shot or a Tylenol before you go. It'll really help. Oh and good luck this weekend, it sounds like fun!! |
| from tanprincess : |
| i just read your entry from today and saw that you are planning to get a bikini wax, will you let me know how badly it hurts and how long it lasts?? you can leave me a note or just post it in your diary, i am just really curious about it! i have been wanting to get one forever now but heard it hurt like hell but was worth all the pain!! thanks!! oh yeah, i hope you have a wonderful weekend w/ jeremy!! |
| from beautyx3 : |
| I totally agree with you on the engagment ring thing. I think $4,000 is a good price, your not being shallow. You should get a nice ring that you like because you have to wear it the rest of your life, it's an investment really. And if your not getting a wedding you should definetly splurge on a nice ring. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Thanks for the note, yeah filing sucks. It's one of the reasons that I wanted notes today so that I would have something to do besides the dreaded filing task. Oh well. One Tree Hill is a great show but right now they are doing the love triangle thing and the girl that I love is losing. That always happens to me, even back in the 90s with the Kelly/Dylan/Brenda triangle. I don't know why the blonde girl always wins. Anyways I am boycotting until they fix it. Oh and I have been to Wilmington too but only twice, it is strange that you haven't recongized anything considering I thought that the town was pretty small when I was there. Oh well, maybe I'll go there when I move to North Carolina. I would love to meet Chad Michael Murray!! Oh and it sounds like things are going great with Jeremy, congrats!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| First of all why aren't you going to have a wedding? I can't imagine not wanting a wedding!! Anyways $4000 is not too much to expect out of an engagement ring. It's the only one that you'll ever have, hopefully. Some people think that it is shallow to want an expensive ring but I don't think it is at all. I always feel sorry for the girls who get tiny little engagement rings and then when people ask to see them, their reaction is shock and then "oh." Since I am a wedding coordinator, I've had to master the fake smile at an ugly ring but I don't want to put anyone else through that. Anyways if a man loves you, he'll want the ring to represent his love for you. The ring is after all a symbol of their feelings towards you...just have him look at it like that. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I don't always feel like going out anymore either, isn't that so strange? I used to go out four times a week and now I am almost content going out once or twice and sometimes none at all. I guess we are all growing up regardless of the fact that we still feel like children half of the time. I don't know what to tell you about the living situation, that is a tough decision. Of course if you really think that you'll be with Jeremy for the rest of your life then why not? I mean is there really any point of continuing a long distance romance if you don't have to? Good luck, I hope that you make a decision that you are happy with!! |
| from beautyx3 : |
| I've been reading your diary, and I really love it, I can so relate to your yo-yo feelings for Jeremy. I have a boyfriend who is so nice, too nice, and sometimes I just don't know if thats what I want. Anyways, you say everything I'm thinking, but better. Great stuff, I'm going to add you to my list, hope you don't mind. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I just wanted to leave you a quick note to say Congratulations on the Colts win this weekend. The Titans lost but we didn't play well so we kind of deserved it, not that I like to admit that. I guess we'll just have to wait until next year. Of course it was freezing at the game, it was negative 10 degrees with wind. The game is going number 2 in the record of coldest games. It was insane. That could have had something to do with the loss considering it was a bunch of southern boys playing in freezing weather, not that we can blame it on that though. I swear the coach had frost under his nose though, insane. I am now rooting for the Colts since Peyton is our boy. It's kind of like we have two teams down here since everyone is so attached to Peyton. Anyways I hope everything is going well with you and I'll be rooting for the Colts for the Super Bowl!! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Girl, break down and ask you parents for money! Don't sell drugs or go racking up interest on credit cards...at least with the 'rents you don't pay interest. You can always pay them back when you get paid next. Make New Years great...go see Jeremy. You don't need to be high or drunk to enjoy it! Have a sex high instead :) |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I just wanted to let you know that I never instigate things either and I HATE calling boys, I think that they should always call me. My ex, Ian, used to complain about that too. I don't know why it matters to them as long as they are getting what they want but oh well. It sounds like you guys had a good weekend. Mine was awful,I need to find a new guy to like but it's impossible where I live. Oh and that's great that you saw the love of your life. It could be fun to hang out with him. Anyways I just didn't want you to feel bad about stuff that happens to everyone. Oh and even if you are just in the honeymoon phase, that is always the most fun. |
| from jemimap : |
| Hiya! Thanks for the note. :) I'm really not sure about the housemates. They all seem nice enough, but I'm so insecure that a look could mean anything. I know he'll be faithful though. We just have so much together... as soppy as that sounds. I am back in Oz for a while, but he'll be visiting soon, so it'll be alright. Such a long way apart, I just wish we were travelling together. I really hope your plans work out. :) xx |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Okay so the Colts won. We played like shit though, I mean how many times did we fumble? It was horrible. I guess this provided you with some happiness over the weekend though. I hope that you made it to Jeremy's, I am sure that you really wanted to go regardless of the weather. Oh and those horse hats that everyone wears were hilarious. |
| from aliboomboom : |
| Okay so I saw that you updated your diary so I stopped in for a read. It sounds like you and Jeremy are going strong, yeh!! Anyways it's great that you are a Colts fan. I went to the University of Tennessee so we all love Peyton down here. I hope Eli wins the Heisman. However I am a HUGE Titans fan and I have season tickets to the Titans games so I'll have to be rooting for them this weekend. It will be odd not going for Peyton. He's a great guy. We partied together a couple times when he was in high school and I was in college and he has gotten a ton better looking since then. Anyways sorry I am obsessed with football, oh and I've always wanted a foam finger too. Do they sell them at the games? Well it's a big game since our teams are tied for first so may the best team win...I'm sure we will. J/K. Really have a great time with Jeremy and enjoy the game and your foam finger!! |
| from aliboomboom : |
| I just recently started reading your journal and I wanted to congratulate you on your weight loss. It sounds like you are going to be much happier if your diet keeps working out. I have been trying to lose weight for a while now too and I feel so much better about that. Good luck with Jeremy. I think that it is good that you have started dating someone so that you don't worry about Ben so much. I just got out of a long term relationship too and I know how much it sucks!! Sounds like you are doing great though!! |
| from stillsingle : |
| Hi, been reading your diary for a while. I'm so happy to hear you're losing weight, not just for the physical aspect, but think of your health...that's probably why you're feeling a lot better. Good luck with Jeremy! I know what you mean about your happiness dependant on being single, I have a tendency to think that way, too. From one single girl to another! Take care. |
| from soverycherry : |
| I'm sorry things suck right now. It is so very, very hard when you come out of a long-term relationship and have to deal with the harsh reality of the single life again. I keep going from one extreme to the other - SO happy that I can do what I want, and then five seconds later, SO depressed that I am by myself. It's very weird, and nonsensical, and being a girl sucks ass. But what are you gonna do? Blah. Anyway, I can't believe that you saw Andrew Firestone! Awesome. He's such a dork, but I loved him anyway. Take care, I'll be back! |
| from katy-bug : |
| I love you just for having the best damn answers to my survey, thank you. And I also love you because you were able to sustain reading through my entire archives. Wow! Also, come move to Texas. You can stay with me and we can hang. I need a roommate, I think. I've been very lonely lately. Or, we could just travel carelessly. Whichever or whatever is fine. Take it easy, babe. |
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