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congratu-fucking-lations! :D that's fantastic! so it's a townhouse, so what? it's a good starter! better than what most people start out with! "Friends First" just bought a house, too. I spent the weekend of 22-24 april driving a big-ass moving truck and wrenching my muscles to help her move into it. I'd offer my services for your June move, but i'll likely still be recovering from this one. ouch. later

from illinoishell :

whoa...back up the truck here... why are *you* so fucked up? you had an unsolicited reminder (via *junk mail* of all fucking things) of a part of your life you'd much rather forget...which, understandbly, upsets you. You are then hounded into confessing raison de waterworks, go out for a while, come back home and your boy has the nerve to give you hell over the no-sex thing... any man over the age of 20 should know that when you come home to a crying woman, no matter what her reasons for crying may be, you'd better *not* try playing "hide the sausage" that night...or, in my case, "hide the vienna sausage" and surprise, surprise...he cries cries cries now, if a woman cries...that's not something completely unexpected... but, i'm sorry...a man who cries as much your boy does...i gotta wonder whether his wife got his balls as part of their divorce settlement... the reasons for that night's drama had nothing to do with you...it doesn't even matter that the catalyst was a painful, personal reminder... your boy dropped the ball, becky becky becky 1:00am? if my woman woke me up at 1:00am to bitch about *me*, after i've had a day similar to yours, i woulda tossed her out on the street as well...but i'd change the fucking locks at first light but that's just me talkin' bottom line, yeah..you're a little fucked up...we all are... but your fucked-up-edness wasn't to blame for the 'irrepairable damage' which has you hitting the panic button...you know the one...it has the name 'cory' emblazened on it? you don't need cory, though... you don't need your boy... you need a real man settle for nothing less than a real man! we're hard to find, but well worth the effort... a good place to start would be the VA hospital...look for some desert storm vet (like myself), who looks like he's taken some shrapnel (like myself), doesn't bitch about his pain and still walks on his feet even though he's been told he should try a wheelchair, and walks tall...with his head held high... when he gets to the cash register, he pays in cash when he pulls into the gas station, he checks his oil... when he speaks, you can feel the rumble of his voice in your chest... he's respectful of his elders, and will kick the fuck out of anyone who hurts women or children... and when you see him crying...one of two things better be going on: 1. He's witnessing the birth of his child, and he's leaking joyfully 2. He's recovering from a kick in the balls...after all, he HAS a pair... later miss thang

from illinoishell :

man, i've lost count of how many times DC has <i>cried</i>...now, watch...you've probably disabled HTML and my note will look like ass with all the markups on it...

from passngstranj :

Well, I have been around other kids, just none so incredibly ADD as this one. And, I don't want to be the snotty person without kids who just assumes they could do better than some actual parent ... I'd like to think I might in this particular case, but then again I can see how his endless hyperactivity could wear just about anyone out.

from rotted :

you did the right thing with the boys. if they get away with it once with you then they will always get away with it. that's how that shit works... good for you for standing up to that barrage of crying.

from illinoishell :

hehe...you've been swooning for a few days now ;-)

from rotted :

it doesn't have to end you know... stop being so fatalistic... it could be beautiful for the remainder of your life... give it a little...

from wishful-me :

I used to love VC Andrews books. I loved the De Beers series, but then I read Flowers in the Attic, and it kind of...I don't know...freaked me out? *Becca

from illinoishell :

i sent you a reply to the 'where the hell have you been in the past six weeks' note you sent me through your AOL addy, but since i've never got a response from you on said AOL addy, i wonder what the hell i was thinking... past six weeks, i've been working my ass off...school, new job... and now i've got another job, starting jan 4, which is actually an old job... but now they're paying me $21/hour instead of $17/hour actually, it's salaried...but i'd rather figure it per hour...keeps my head from exploding check your dang AOL addy...hehe...i wrote you a much more verbose account of the past six weeks in the email i sent ya... later, chris the non-sexed one

from passngstranj :

Yes. Here is a picture of me relating 100%. Why must we do everything in our power to fuck up anything that might actually be healthy?

from sososadgirl :

BUT, you're questioning if it's right or wrong, which sort of means its wrong and you already know that. heh

from passngstranj :

... couldn't we say, if I need to ask her then I'm not really single? I mean, if we're just friends, who I do or do not sleep with otherwise would not be her business, right?

from insane-whore :

Your "100 Things" was very interesting... I hope you can be truly happy one day ♥ Take care and good luck

from rotted :

hey girlie... your link doesn't work

from passngstranj :

Ps -- yeah, antithesis of helpful is well put. But it's cool -- I sent the danged flowers already anyways. And I feel rather like you -- I tend to do the wrong thing most of the time anyhow. Ah well, let the chips fall where they may, right?

from passngstranj :

Hm, maybe I really am DC in disguise... dunno, definitely seems I understand an awful lot of his actions. I wouldn't ask about your ex either, if it were me -- basically, I'd see it like, if you wanted to talk about him, you would. If you don't, you must not want to. As far as only telling he loves you in bed? I guess you could say easier -- I know I always find it kind of awkward in other circumstances -- I dunno, seems like guys aren't supposed to be all lovey and stuff. But it's acceptable in bed -- plus, that's also probably where it becomes so overwhelming that he just has to say it. Speaking of which, the "something" sex you're talking about? Would that be "making love", as opposed to sex?

from passngstranj :

Well, rock on, miss unconfused. Might we all be so fortunate! Also, about DC's feelings? Hell, *I* coulda told you that...

from passngstranj :

Hey, but she *started* it. Ask no confusing questions, get no confusing answers...

from passngstranj :

Hmm, I just thought of something. Supposing DC told you he was madly, completely, helplessly in love with you? What would you do then? Somehow, I'm guessing that if I said any such thing to CG, she'd run away screaming as if I'd tried to set her on fire. Tch, just a thought.

from passngstranj :

Dude ... y'know, I'm about ready to call it quits with my own cg. So allow me to say, on DC's behalf: You turn "i really like you, dont want to mess this up ,i cant shut up sometimes.so lets just keep havin fun." to "I'm so happy you're my cum dumpster"? Okay, this is more directed to my cg than to you, but what the fuck is wrong with you? God, at least wait for the guy to fuck you over before you persecute him. How can anyone possibly be decent to you if you won't let him? But again, I apologize -- really, this is what I feel towards the chick in my own life, and your own life is your own. But seriously -- what have you seen to make you think this guy's a dick? He's *telling* you that all he wants is to not screw up with you -- would it be too much to give him at least one road where that's possible? Yes, guys want sex. But, as the owner of a penis, I can honestly testify that that's not all we want. Cut a brother some slack, wouldja?

from passngstranj :

Wow, jesus christ. Considering that you seem to disagree with yourself immediately after saying something, maybe you're actually *saving* him some confusion by not trying to explain? Nah, just kidding. Seriously tho, you're all messed up and shit because there's what you wonder about, there's what you *think* he thinks, there's what you're *afraid* he thinks -- okay, really? You are absolutely not incapable of talking about how you feel. In the least, you're not incapable of listening to how he feels/what he thinks. Though really, it seems pretty clear this is a guy who just really likes you. It can't be just a matter of his being uncomfortable with a purely sexual relationship -- you wouldn't bother telling your family about a fuckbuddy, or introduce her to your kids. So he likes you -- the question is whether you'll *let* him like you that much?

from rotted :

it is entirely possible to be "in love" with someone in 3 weeks time... everyone is different. maybe you should face up to this and see where it takes you... you already talk about the guy incessantly and think about him probably as much! lol! maybe that's a sign that you should look into it a bit deeper than just a booty call...?

from passngstranj :

Hey, lady. Just wanted to thank you for the nod, and also congratulate you on being being smart enough not to take relationship advice from me. ;)

from rotted :

duh... nevermind

from rotted :

what's a cg?

from passngstranj :

Hm. See, you seem to be doing the Confusing Girl thing, too. If you don't think the thing will last out the year, why not enjoy as much of it as you can right now? As in, if you wanna talk to the guy, talk to him -- feeling like "just sex" relationships last longer than "real" ones is irrelevant if you're sure it's gonna end anyway. Besides, you obviously like each other for more than sex ... what's the point of trying to deny that when it's something to make you both the happier, for *however* long it lasts... (Btw, no offense meant with that "Confusing Girl" thing.)

from rotted :

maybe he doesn't know how to act either. maybe he is confused by your lack of "like you lots" and so he's not sure if it's supposed to be just sex. seems to me that you need to have a sit down (with your clothes on) chat and figure out what each of you wants out of this. if you don't want more tho' then fuck the chat and don't spend so much time thinking/worrying about what he must be thinking because you shouldn't care.

from rotted :

oh and... congrats on the pounds melting off! that's great! i know how long you've been working at that... it will come... these things take time! :D

from rotted :

thanks for the thoughts... i appreciate the nod in the entry... i wouldn't go so far as to say "hot" tho'... but thank you all the same! smooches!

from erik-76 :

Hey! how are ya? [email protected]

from illinoishell :

Reading your diary made me decide to post my own...and I even gave you credit for it...

from rotted :

you NEED to come to my forum... so there

from rotted :

happy belated birthday!!!! i didn't know...

from rotted :

hey... i'm retarded... i just realized that the last 5 were on your page already. me=tard

from rotted :

as far as i know... all you have to do is put this "<td class="caption"><center>THE LAST 5 ENTRIES...</center><BR> %%older_entries%%</td>" at the bottom of your page and it should work... if it doesn't then i can't help you out.

from passngstranj :

I thank you kindly, madam. It sucks about your guy, love just tends to be a pain in the ass, doesn't it? Also majorly sux about the DWI. Liquor=bad. Pot=better. IMHO. Wish I had some. :)

from lovely-freak :

you didn't do the wrong thing... it IS a trust issue and if she can't be honest enough to pay you back even a little of the money at a time then she sure as hell shouldn't be spending it on a tv... besides which if she had paid you the $300. instead of buying the tv then she would be almost paid off... or actually... she would be paid off and in the free and clear. you should tell her that.

from lovely-freak :

holy shit! i thought you'd given up on us... glad to see your words back on the screen...

from lovely-freak :

i do not think that you over-reacted. i think that it was a bad judgement call on the part of the gym teacher and quite frankly i would go talk to the principal about it. i don't know really what good that would do tho' besides make you feel a bit better... good luck with that. at least you won't have to worry about a 3yr old on a skateboard. be happy for that!

from lovely-freak :

the rumors are true... 3rd lair is where it's at... at least, as far as i know.

from lovely-freak :

where the fuck have you been?

from lorshad :

whoa... and i thought i had it bad... you have officially usurped my position as the person everything bad happens to. get at me... maybe we should chat or something.

from joesimone :

yep married. She's from montana and she moved out here to be a nanny. Then we started going out, and well why wait. So we got married in August. Hope life is going good for you. Later.

from sososadgirl :

Well, you're a tiny thing Miss! I was assuming you were taller. I'm not so concerned about your weight obsession now. :-) . I forgot to send you a b-day greeting, I'm sorry!

from lovely-freak :

i'm 5'1", on a good day i weight 103 and on a bad day i weigh 108. my measurements are 32-26-32... i'm gonna wittle that 26 down to something... and hopefully not lose anything else in the process. don't worry... I KNOW I'M NOT FAT... i hope i articulated that well enough in my entry. it truly is a girl thing to think the way i do... unless of course i'm the only one... in which case this could be a problem. i've never stopped to think about whether or not it was just me. ugh.

from lovely-freak :

i laugh too when he throws a tantrum... the whole time i was taking pictures he kept saying "no mama"... it was too funny. he wasn't even mad at anything in particular and started crabbing so i told him i was going to take pictures and he got even angrier. don't worry tho' he was fine after i stopped taking pictures and went downstairs with him and got him a juice.

from caspia :

Hey fellow Minnesotan! If you're a fan of the Wild, or love the Twins, please join the Wild, or Twins-fan diaryrings. Let everyone know we support them. Thanks and have a great day.

from chadmuska :

i sooooo don't think you are a stalker!! i've read your dairy before. you list miss nikki (lovely-freak) as a favorite! you can't be a stalker then.

from sososadgirl :

David - I just read some of Liza's stuff. Wow. She's getting out there. She's not LDS anymore, huh?

from joesimone :

Hey good to hear your back. Have you read liza's diary recently. I think she's going down a bad direction, but that's my opinion. hope she turns around.

from lovely-freak :

it's about god-damn-time that you wrote something! i thought you were dead or something! i don't have an accurate e-mail address for you anymore... you should give it to me again!

from kalsty :

I want to send you and emial, but it's hard to when you're aol account is down. Do you have another one? I

from joesimone :

hey there... I updated mine just thought I'd let you know. and I got a cell phone. Wow my first one!!!! Later.

from joesimone :

I'm sorry to hear your having such a hard time. I wish I was there for you to be a real life friend. Just please don't kick me. Hugging is cool but remeber I have a GF right now. :) Hope you feel better..... Dave

from sososadgirl :

Hmm...the notes thing is cool, but isn't that what everyone has been using their g-books for anyway?

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