DiaryLand members area

lol.. eve is a video game.. its an MMOG.. and so it has a chat feature.. your not a worthless piece of shit.. if you were.. i wouldnt talk to you at all now would i??

from whykill :

:) i've done lots of re-search.. i think these doctors just dont want to admit i might be sick or something!?! i get VERY thirsty some days.. the point where i want to throw up i've drank so much water.. but i'm still parched.. I've got a blood test scheduled for the weekend.. we shall see how that goes.. i just hope i have something.. that i can do something about.. haha.. i'm tired of not knowing and running blindly trying to self medicate..

from madlyme :

its cool about school and not being online! i was just making sure you werent mad at me :) anyways im goin to leave you some offline comments on yahoo to say something about you know who :)

from cherrygash :

I'm in love with your picture.

from whykill :

i dont so much mean the point of relationships.. that is actually a quite minor thing.. i just mean what is the point of everything? i am asking that alot these days.. i know the answer is to eat.. breed.. and die... but that is so unsatisfying..

from idiot-milk :

I adore my dad for his orneriness and for his love of robots. The nice thing about it, too, is that he can't ever give me grief for my own obstinate or unreasonable behavior because I learned it all from him!

from kissmyargyle :

aw. i've tried to leave before, too, but it was never the same. this is my home. :)

from stormyskyz :

what the hell.. what?

from stormyskyz :

i know *exactly* what you mean by "i can't wait." sigh. it is really hard sometimes, because sometimes you just feel so damn OKAY. <3

from whykill :

incase your still confused.. boys dont like girls.. boys like breasts, sex and some form of sports.. where as girls actually like boys.. and i'm being really sarcasitc or cynical or something because i've been exposed to alot of shitty people recently..

from whykill :

you should go to sleep if your tired. :) i wasnt saying your breasts get you guys.. i was saying it is easy for girls because guys will come up to them and throw themselves at them.. girls get aproached.. guys dont..

from whykill :

i dont look either.. and i never find fuck all.. maybe its because my breasts are so small.. and of course it might be that girls dont like breasts at all.. or maybe i'm just too good at not looking..

from whykill :

it was just a quote from a tv show i was watching. it seemed very fitting for the moment. you may not be looking but you keep finding..

from stormyskyz :

haha i was just reading your surveys, and realized that my manager at mcd's made people do "lobby" as a punishment when they did something they didn't like. i got lobby a few times :( fucking sucked.

from kissmyargyle :

haha. no way, man. this dude's real funny. ..not that dan conner isn't, but.. :)

from stormyskyz :

your wish is my command!

from stormyskyz :

actually, i tried that keeping things to myself thing. as you'll remember from my LJ.... don't :(

from madlyme :

but but but your diary is the only one that i read anymore :(

from stormyskyz :

wtf yes i do read my notes!!!

from stormyskyz :

well um, that was shocking. and right when i make my great comeback too =[ oh well i can't stay mad at you. i'll just miss you lots <3

from kissmyargyle :

adium for mac. it took me a while to get used to.

from stormyskyz :

oh muffin :( be okay.

from usb-port :

i tried to leave a comment, not sure it worked. i used to whisper those words into her ears when she slept because i couldn't say them when she was awake.

from stormyskyz :

ok look mang, i resurrected this shit just so i can leave you a comment. don't forget about your canuck girl who cares, ok?

from whykill :

its not fair. here you are.. somebody who likes lots of attention.. but cant seem to find anybody to give it to you.. and here i am.. just looking for somebody to spend every day with.. and i cant find that person.. when are you done school again?? :0

from whykill :

Oh.. and i didnt have to treat you like meat.. we already "knew" eachother.. so you didnt see as much of my uncomfortable distance.. Or maybe your just fucking awsome?

from whykill :

haha i've been told i'm not gay by the guy i was with. i think it was more of a curiosity.. plus i'm a huge slut when i'm drunk and i like being dominated. He grabbed my hand and dragged me to the bedroom... it wouldnt have mattered who it was that would have gotten me excited.. naked boys dont disgust me but they dont really turn me on either..

from whykill :

what are you confused about?

from whykill :

arrr matey send me yurr adress again n ill send along a copy of worrrd for yarrr..

from whykill :

i wasnt really home much this weekend.. i was at jello friday.. i was setting up my home network saturday morning.. then i was with my friend chris all saturday night and sunday.. then sunday evening i was with my roomate.. and sunday night i was half asleep half watching a movie about the bermuda triangle.

from whykill :

i'm going to show that screaming kid to my friends.. i just found out they are #@%@# pregnant.. i dont know how good of parents they will be.. the girl is super bossy naggy hypocrite who often does rather irresponsable things.. example.. she was a babysitter and she went to work drunk.. the guy.. cant work at a job longer then a few months.. has to spend most of his time fighting the urge to start using drugs again.. it goes on like this.. of course.. these are my friends.. i should probably speak nicer of them.. anyway that video made me laugh..

from whykill :

my diary is back. which is nice.. i'm also online if you are.. but its late in your time.. my dad is moving back here.. so untill he dies i will not even consider leaving.. after that its a matter of weather i can pick up my business and move some where else? something tells me starting my own company has officially tied me to this one location forever.

from cuddleslut3 :

lol okay i edited for you :)... altho i dont think it sounded like you did. none the less, i thought it was funny so i had to write about it. :) hope youre having a good friday!

from whykill :

no.. but when i checked that both the first two places are blank.. the older one has stuff in it tho

from whykill :

i think i'm going to cry :( i dont know why its blank???

from whykill :

i'm online now.. is 1am my time tho.. so your probably sleeping

from whykill :

smoke cloves then.. they taste great and make you smell nice too.. they cost alot more money though. plus you can get black ones, they are the ultimate smoke for the depressed goth everywhere (my roomate used to buy 1 pack per month as a treat).

from whykill :

eeeeewww smoking.. when did you start that nasty ass habbit?

from whykill :

ok i got yours fast because i happened to be checking my email when it gave me the message that i got one.. and then it gave me another.. and so on.. i didnt mind your legs!

from whykill :

how did you get my note so fast? i'm short.. but i also sit closer b/c i'm weird and i can drive faster that way.

from whykill :

that would be awsome!!! i sit to close to the steering wheel though.. :(

from whykill :

i dont think i could drive while doing that.. mostly b/c my car is a standard.. i got a hand job while driving once.. that was distracting..

from whykill :

you probably missed it b/c i posted two entries almost at the same time.. i had written them offline so it only took a few seconds to cut and paste into the diary.

from whykill :

no.. i'm a bad person :(.. i only want one of two things right now.. a real live girl to watch movies with.. or video games.. which effectivly distract me from the fact that i'm not watching movies with a real live girl..

from whykill :

thwf.. when i re read it i understood better.. yes i will be flirtatious.. sometimes i think i am to subtle or to shy though.. i guess its because i dont need to be hit on to like somebody.. i like them because they are smart and fun to talk to and like doing things i like to do.. i think maybe i might be to reserved to ever find somebody...

from whykill :

i dont usually hit people.. i've accepted that i can never have a goth girl since i would have to beat her up during sex and i cant do that. violence doesnt turn me on.

from ericboy :

Oh, yeaahhh. Sorry. Selective memory. A nap sounds good. ;)

from ericboy :

Yes, that really happened. In fact, I found myself singing it the other day. Though, I must admit, I remember the shower more ;)

from ericboy :

That last note you sent me didn't make any sense. What are you talking about?

from ericboy :

Of course I read my notes. They're like my own personal little... notes. What can I say? Monkeys rock. I didn't know Bowie was a spider monkey. That explains a lot. Tell him I said "Happy Monkey B-Day".

from ericboy :

You've encrypted your Diary-X sight. Ingenious, and disheartening. Can I peek?

from bybloodline :

sorry to hear about the snake :( so far i've run over a rabbit and a bird hit my car one time. oh god i was so upset. actually i was crying for days, and my boyfriend thought i was insane. i tried so hard not to hit that poor rabbit... oh god..

from ericboy :

Why do you choose to celebrate your departure? Your last note was cute. I liked the stumbling of your narrative. Fine work.

from ericboy :

I know the lyrics are in the CD liner notes, but I thought I'd spare your eyes a bit. Plus, redundancy is often its own reward.

from ericboy :

Tool is typically on the list, but I try to change up the profile on occasion and cycle in new bands. There's always a Maynard mention somewhere. Glad you like the stuff. Did you get the separate envelope of whiny, self-obsessive lyrics?

from annie-m-s-b :

Rock on!!!! The urges will pass, I haven't had any for a month! Keep writing...get it out.....it will help. I'd miss you if you didn't write here.

from betchy :

i think she is going to upload them onto her new diary when she has the time. as soon as she does i will let you know, so you can have a peep x

from ericboy :

I mailed you shizz-nizzle today. It should arrive in three days or so.

from ericboy :

I'm glad you like the tunes. The three songs on the myspace site are part of a 5-song demo that we cut in April. If you'd like, I could send you the whole thing.

from betchy :

well thank you for the note and thank you for adding me! we all know what an attention whore i am! thats mad that you couldnt do the survey, i dont know what happened there! glad you are enjoying my diary, and when i get the chance i will pop in and read some of yours. my curiosity is piqued now. thanks again for the note x

from annie-m-s-b :

All right another Nikon babe!!!!! I have an old one that I love.... thinking about the digital.... job hunting now so who knows. Nikon rocks! Don't know about Flickr.... link it and I will take a look, fotolog kind of sucks so I haven't kept it up. hope you day is going well. Hugs

from ericboy :

STOP reading "American Psycho". It will put images in your head that you can't erase. Trust me. You will see things that you can't unsee.

from ericboy :

All apologies on the ill-timing. When the CD gets mixed down, I'd love to send you one. I hope you like it. Hang in there in Michigan! I miss you. I'm sorry that I'm such a dick; it would have been nice to say "goodbye".

from pulse-tone :

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

from shirley-it :

what a cool pic. i hate the morning as much as you do.

from basal :

from stormyskyz :

Yep, Windsor is right across the lake. Right now I'm quite far from there, but when I live at home I'm only about 3 hours. Haha. Canada is way too big for its own good.

from stormyskyz :

Michigan eh? Closer to me than you ever have been.

from stormyskyz :

i don't know what's going on because i lost track, but <3 anyways.

from xnotenoughx :

name - welcome; password - home I haven't been using Diaryland cuz I can't get my site to load; but I have another diary on myspace.com. Lemme know if you wanna check that out. xoxox

from shirley-it :

http://starke-.diaryland.com/021505.html, lovin' this entry!

from whykill :

yeah so did i.. but not so much.. only when it works for her advantage.. if you know what i mean.. thats what sucks about this whole thing.. most of us see whats going on here.. but we keep going back anyway..

from studionique :

Hey, saw that u were looking for diaries to add on someone's note board. I just started mine and plan on update frequently, come visit me.

from whykill :

hahahahaha.. i wondered where my scroll bar went.. well firefox works faster.. so maybe i just need to find another alternative browser i dont know.. but the internet hasnt been slow once since i stoped using intercrap exploreher..

from shirley-it :

hey! thank you! i'll start to read you =]

from whykill :

the garbage pile is work... and you arent at my work every day cheering me up.. you cheer me up at the glowing rectangle when i get home from work..

from ericboy :

me? stalk? no. never. actually, the version i heard was a cover by a band with a girl singer. i can't find the liner notes, so i don't know who they are, but they did a really good job.

from cufluture :

i don't know about a book, but i do know this about astrology: there are several different ways to do a birthchart. and how your chart ends up depends on which method you use. So, that could be why you're getting different signs and planets, the book you bought could have used another method. That all points to astrology being a bunch of crap, but it's still interesting. I got my chart done online for $15, they sent it in an email.

from cufluture :

i think it's really bad for a person to live their entire lives in the place where they were born, the move will probably be a good thing for you. I'm sure your cats will still love you, too.

from diet-kate :

ooh the princess bride, havent seen that in AGES. I hope this new town works out better for you. Thanks for the note, im glad im not as..odd looking as that girl frim degrassi high

from cufluture :

are you really moving to michigan? That is exciting! I hope your cats will be okay with the move.

from cufluture :

it's a good thing to let yourself feel how you need to about a break up. forget how you're "supposed" to feel. Just let yourself do what you need so you can move on. People who pretend it doesn't affect them will have to deal with their feelings later on, all at once. That's what I think anyway. You seem to be handling everything okay. :)

from ericboy :

I saw in your blog that you recently rediscovered how beautiful VAST's "Flames" is. I had to make mention of the fact that I started listening to that CD at work on Saturday, the 8th, to pass time in the cage and because my copy is in a box on a very high shelf. I've been singing it for days! That's just too wierd. I think, despite everything, we're still connected somehow. Take care.

from diet-kate :

that is the cutest ever!

from cufluture :

it's too bad that you're out of money, but things will come back around, you just need to stick it out. An idea you might have overlooked for some quick money is pawn shops, especially for selling things like CDs and electronics. Things will work out for the best. Take care.

from diet-kate :

i'd care if you left diaryland. unless it was something you needed to do, to help yourself.. id miss reading up on things. stay safe

from diet-kate :

Happy New Years Hun. I hope the new year is a better and brighter one. Perhaps this year you will get back ontop of things, financially aswell as emotionally. I really hope you do... there is always hope hun ***hugs***

from cufluture :

heh, you sound like my dad (about the solstice). I don't think I could actually strip for inbred hunters, I was mostly just making a point, but they make SO MUCH Money! Sorry to hear that things aren't going well with SAM. My boyfriend used to drink a lot too, it really changes someone's personality! I hope you get useful things in MI too. It's the best part of X-mas!

from cufluture :

isn't it disgusting how much strippers make? I thought so. Have fun in MI.

from diet-kate :

*hugs* bc i think you may need one.. and MERRY CHRISTMAS, hope the santa season is brighter

from cufluture :

I'd buy some of your CDs to help you out, but I'm broke myself. It's not my fault, though, it's my boyfriends. Hope you can get out of the red, it sucks to have to worry about money!

from galaxyrabbit :

(your password for me is not working and i'm awfully sad. could you email it to me? [email protected]. thank you so much)... i do know about natal chart books! i have a bunch! do you want to specifically and only *draw up* natal charts, as in calculate them, or do you want a good book that teaches you how to interpret them?

from cufluture :

hee hee, I did go out. Thanks!

from ericboy :

I think of you often. Your inability to accept your own beauty saddens me. I don't know how much weight you want to give that coming from me, but know that your looks were never a problem, as far as I was concerned. You were, and are, beautiful. Have a Merry Christmas.

from cufluture :

thanks.

from cufluture :

okay, thanks! I just bought some stuff off ebay too, even though I probably shouldn't have! The e stands for evil. hee hee.

from p1nk-r0se-29 :

Yes, writing in here does help me, does it help you? There is a lot i want to write though that i haven't been able to - do you find that? xxx

from p1nk-r0se-29 :

Yes, writing in here does help me, does it help you? There is a lot i want to write though that i haven't been able to - do you find that? xxx

from p1nk-r0se-29 :

I like your writing. You put things very cleverly.

from cufluture :

oooohhh, that really is a beautiful tarot deck!!!

from cufluture :

I don't think there is such a thing as a romantic soulmate, I think people just make due with those that are around them. But, I do think that everyone has at least one, if not many soulmates, that they are here just to teach us important lessons, and they might not be romantically involved with us at all. Just a thought.

from cufluture :

Sorry to hear that. The internet is really expensive, though. We pay around $50 a month, it's our most expensive bill. But now that we have it, I think I'd go a little mental without it. Do they have internet access at a library there? They offer it for free here (you just need a library card), you might want to check that out as an option until you can afford it at home again.

from cufluture :

what the hell kind of insurance company do you have? "Do you go to church?" that really sucks they called just to harrass you. :( You have the people on diaryland, though. It's something. Sometimes it's my only support.

from cufluture :

tromeo and julliet is a really weird movie, but sweet too. I thought I was the only person out there who had seen it. ha ha!

from misspinkkate :

Thanks for linking to me in your journal!

from judging :

Password, yo.

from cufluture :

password? please.

from cufluture :

I wish I could help you with the text on your template. I've never been able to figure that out either.

from cufluture :

weird dreams. Ogre is so fucking cool. I am so glad that I got to see them, just in case they never tour again!

from judging :

Yesterday I finally bought a CD mailer and a padded envelope, so it's no problem. I could also send you Fahrenheit 451 if you'd rather have that instead. Just need your info and it'll be on its way.

from cufluture :

Thanks. That's a great photo, it'd make a really pretty template, but the one you have now is realy nice too. I found that quote at thinkexist.com, it's a pretty good quote site.

from gumphood :

i like your autobiography. I found it very interesting. What about reading is the linchpin for you. Some music, some art...but words for you. Why?

from cufluture :

The one of me or the one of the studio? either way, thanks. I need to get more $$ so I can get a good deal on film off ebay. I got my camera off there for $1!!!

from cufluture :

thank you! It's Kafka. I swear I love that man.

from cufluture :

Yes! Skinny Puppy! I am so fucking excited. I sent you an email, too, so you know, in case you don't check it often.

from cufluture :

secretary is a great movie! :) I actually watched it yesterday too.

from cufluture :

i really love that photo (from the movie). I'm still holding onto a copy of Evil Eye #1, if you want it in the future. #2 will be done really soon, but I can't even afford to copy it right now myself. I understand about being broke. We have $50 for the rest of the month!

from that :

thank you. i like to keep it simple.

from cufluture :

oh i know, he looks like a total demon! I'm not happy that I feel forced to vote for someone just to get someone else out of office. Things shouldn't work like this!

from cufluture :

thing is, it probably WILL help him get rural votes, I know it will help him here in Roch. Pretty soon now, this town will start to smell like blood from all the hunting. It's sick. What he did is an example of the reason why I'm worried so many people think this guy is going to save the world...

from opiumeyed :

:( i feel so bad about it but i can't get out of the one relationship. damn.

from cufluture :

wow, I'd be shocked if SP toured with NIN. I thought trent reznor and ogre had some "bad blood" between them. Hopefully I get to see SP before they fade away. Either way I'd go see NIN. But then again, they always go to Minneapolis...

from cufluture :

ahhhh! Skinny puppy! They raised me too, and I'm ONLY 27. heh. I'm extremely jealous.

from whykill :

we both know it doesnt matter who you vote for.. bush didnt "win" the last election and he wont "win" this one.. but he will be president.. its only an insane conspiracy theory untill it happens..

from crateobscure :

So! Let me know how the Brittney Speares show is! She is sooooooooo cooooooool! lol!

from whykill :

http://www.vhemt.org/ did i tell you about this yet?

from obviousman03 :

Psst, I know it's The Divine Comedy (originally titled The Comedy, haHA!), but the book I have is just the Inferno part of it, in Italian and English, with philosphical arguments in the beginning and end from random people who think they're smart. Thank for caring though :-)

from crateobscure :

I thought you were cool until I found out you were seeing The Dresden Dolls on the 20th instead of the 13th. Who goes to concerts on non-prime days of the month? ;) Anyway, nice to meet someone else on Diaryland who likes Lovecraft.

from lesbfriends6 :

awesome. hope you have a great day!

from cufluture :

okay, I'll hold a copy of my new zine for you, because I'm down to three. (yay!) You don't have to pay for the others I sent, though, so don't worry about it. You buy all my (and Pat's) other stuff, so just consider it a free gift. I hope that I'm not really so bitchy in person, just in writing. Not like I ever see anyone in person, but anyway...weird dream you had.

from cufluture :

that was a sweet story on how you and your boyfriend met. :)

from crateobscure :

I like your diary. Good stuff.

from lostgem :

Thanks for the comment...I have actually thought about that, but I'm not sure that that is something he even knows about, with what this being new to both of us. I guess the only thing that really bothered me was that he got turned on by the fact I was in pain...I really don't know though. I really appriciate you explaining all that though. ~Katy~

from confrere :

He's the one that should be crying. He should be feeling terrible that he took a really great person for granted. Hopefully he'll soon come to his senses and realize all that he's lost. You really do deserve better than that.

from lostgem :

Nope, I don't have any banners...I hope no one is too...but, we'll see. I don't want to worry about it too much, or have it come to where I lock my diary. Anyway, I'm about to go so I'll talk to you later...have a good night!

from lostgem :

I know what mine looks like when I add it, but it showed the "update" part when I wasn't even home. And how would they get to my page through their own update page?

from lostgem :

Yea, and some were normal, like they'd just typed in the address to my site, and others weren't, like they had actually gone to my update page, as if they knew my password. So, I changed it...I don't know...maybe I'm just being paranoid. I hope so, anyway.

from laura-jane :

Thank you so very much for your comment! It's always exciting when someone new says hello, as I'm sure you know. (Although, I hope you didn't read through my old entries, because, boy, some of those are embarrassing!) Funny how quickly a person changes, don't you think? I must say, I just attempted to read your diary, but I am receiving the most absurd message that I have never received from diaryland before: it says "Starke- could not be found, please check the name and try again". I am not getting the standard diaryland 'error' page, nor the standard 'locked' pop-up message. Is this normal? Is it me?

from cufluture :

I use my LJ as sort of my "daily activities" diary, and it sucks. So, I'd have to agree that the diaries where people think more than do are more enjoyable to read. But, there's some people who can just pull it off. I guess their lives are just more interesting than mine would ever be. I don't think it's annoying that you write about your boyfriend in that way, that's how emotions are. I just feel like an idiot describing all the nice things my boyfriend does for me, because if you don't know him, they are out of context. It goes back to him not being typically "romantic." I know when he's gone out of his way to do something, when other people might not see anything in it at all, so I don't bother writing about it. I don't know if those eleven people actually read my journal, though. I try not to look at that list anymore.

from obviousman03 :

sono triste che siete nell'amore con lui. :-) happy?

from lostgem :

Lol, thanks! And, I do know how you feel about the whole job thing. I feel that way with Eben a lot, especially since I'm living with him now and I feel like I'm not contributing enough...and besides, cleaning the apartment and ironing makes me feel like a housewife. Anyway, good luck with the job hunting! ~Katy~

from whykill :

alot of people have been saying "your worth more then what you make" and i saw proof on friday.. a job posting i easily qualify for that is for between 18-25 $/H.. i didnt buy your gold.. but i was going to.. u said 26 days i was just waiting for my next payday..

from cufluture :

I understand. I am hopelessly romantic, but my boyfriend just isn't. It took me quite awhile to realize just because he doesn't do the flower thing (or anything like that)doesn't mean anything. He used to not return my phone calls, or promise to call and then not all the time. I don't know what he wrote about when we lived apart, I guess just everyday life, mostly. And sex. I really looked forward to him visiting. Not just for the sex, though. :) I don't know how we've stayed together so long. Co-dependence, maybe.

from whykill :

what does gold cost? i may be getting a new job..

from cufluture :

some guys just aren't "romantic." Mine isn't at all, and it took me a long time to realize that didn't mean he doesn't care. Don't get too upset about him not calling often anymore, I'm sure he's pretty busy and thinks about you.

from cufluture :

wow. you're jealous of galaxyrabbit, huh? I really feel that what she's done with the dating service thing is just... I don't know. Evil. I think you and your boyfriend really have good communication. You might not think so, but it seems like it to me.

from blurry-kat :

*hugs*

from whykill :

hey.. i saw this website and instantly thought of you.. i know you have lots of places to.. "get it out" but here is another.. http://www.pissedoffpeople.com/

from cufluture :

i used to really like having a couch, until they broke, which they always did, and then you have to get a new one, and move it. I guess living on the third floor in an attic just made me hate the idea of moving some piece of furniture you can't dis and re-assemble. Sorry to hear you had to go on the pill. I used to, and at the time I thought it was great, but it started to cause me problems, so I had to stop. So I tried the shot, and that was worse. Ick.

from cufluture :

us too...we only had some hand-me-down kitchen stuff from my mom, and whatever I had in my room (which all fit in my hatchback car). After this last move, I was totally shocked at how much we had gathered. Except for a couch. I hate them, and I'll never get one of those again, ever.

from cufluture :

i do care. I hope bowie will be okay! Really, don't worry about paying for my zines, I really don't care about that, but I'm glad you enjoy them. Take care.

from blueeyes76 :

hello ! thanks a lot for your note and for viewing my fotolg ! so sweet from you. Take care. *Hughs* xxx

from obviousman03 :

cutters are utterly dependent and reliable. that's what i find attactive about them. "awesome"...just for you.

from cufluture :

grrrr...you get to see skinny puppy. I'm jealous. They didn't even come CLOSE to MN. :(

from blurry-kat :

*hugs* im not sure what to say, i read your diary and im lost for words. its just me. but i wanted to give you a hug. Kat

from confrere :

By the way, how do you get your rings to show up like that?

from confrere :

The joys of idiot doctors who have no idea what they're doing.

from cufluture :

I'm glad to hear you're not too worried, I'm sure it will go fine. I sent you the zines already, btw, because you and one other person were the only two who have ever bought any. I just appreciate people who support me, so you don't have to worry about it. Thanks for the offer, though, that was nice.

from cufluture :

Sorry to hear it's so expensive, but at least you have insurance! Hope all goes well for you with that.

from whykill :

RE: aug 17th.. you know i can.. you just have to ask.. i know we havent talked much.. but thats probably my fault..

from cufluture :

have you considered planned parenthood? They have a sliding fee scale and installment payments, based on your income, without insurance. I used to go there for birth control. Just a thought.

from theladyrisu :

Basically what happened was a massive break-up spree in July. The ravyn broke up with Nate and I broke up with Aaron and no one's really speaking to each other. O_o Quite different from December when everyone was just a big cuddlemuffin...

from confrere :

Are you talking about the self-titled album?

from confrere :

I downloaded No fair Fights and really enjoyed it. I can't find Makebelieve, but I added to my slsk wishlist so hopefully someone will have it eventually. Thanks for the suggestion.

from jmalfunction :

in reference to the tape you posted on the mix-tapes diary on 2004-08-23 - 12:30 a.m.! the name of the mogwai song is "honey" and it is a cover of a spacemen 3 song that they did for a tribute album, hence the "tribute to spacemen" bit! you should check out the original, it is excellent!

from lostgem :

hey, i used to have a diary under miagoddess...i'm not sure if you remember but i'm going to try and keep this diary a better secret...hope things are going well for you.

from confrere :

I think I might have heard maybe one or two songs by Prick. I've been meaning to check him out, but just haven't gotten around to it. Have any song suggestions?

from confrere :

Meh, I'd be going nuts in your situation.

from inacrumbling :

i had the same problem on one of my computers, but it seems to have worked itself out on my side, and i haven't gotten any other comments about it (other than that the text is a bit cramped) ... :S i don't know what it could be. let me know if it changes - otherwise, i've considered changing my template lately - so you probably won't have to worry about it much longer. thanks for letting me know :)

from cufluture :

ha, it took me a minute to know what you meant. Yeah, it's one of Pat's knick-knacks. Pretty cool, though.

from stormyskyz :

you are not annoying. <3

from blurry-kat :

Hey. im not sure. but i put you on a list to read. the password is cinderella *hugs* kate

from cufluture :

I don't know what that last note of mine is supposed to mean. WTF? Anyway, hope all is well.

from stormyskyz :

le sigh. this upsets me, and i can see why you would be so mad. what is more upsetting to me, though, is that every time i open your diary you have changed your mind. now of course changing your mind isn't a bad thing. but you are alternating between these two extremes. i'm wondering if maybe you can see it from where you are -> i used to be in the exact same kind of situation and now that i think about it, i did the same thing. i loved him more than anything. then i hated him more than anything. anyway, the point i am trying to make is that i think maybe you should read your older entries and actually *SEE* what you're writing.. not for him but just for what it *is*. then maybe make up your mind. and whatever happens, i am here for you to talk to. remember: the world is full of flat squirrels that couldn't make up their mind. don't let this beat you. (much love) <3 amineh

from cufluture :

you're better than Tori Amos. At least to me. I hate her music, her voice, her appearance. She annoys me.

from theladyrisu :

I nearly screeched when I saw the pricetag on that apartment. I have a feeling it's little more than a bedroom with a kitchenette tacked on (the bathroom is outside, in the bushes), but anything free of Momzilla...and yes, that is a very good reason for loving someone. >^_^<

from blurry-kat :

I hope you do eat something though...Things sound alright, im glad its been a few days since you were depressed.. hopefully it becomes more and more days. I need to clean up my apartment this weekend. ick!

from blurry-kat :

its very strange, bc apart from the most recent two, before that 12 entries keep going to the LIz has purple hair entry. And the entries before those 12 link fine. I contacted diaryland. I will see what they say. Ive checked everything and i cant see the problem with the html. its strange that only 12 archived entries are doing this.

from blurry-kat :

RYN: thankyou. i've been changing things and somewhere i stuffed up the html code. its still not perfect. for some reason on my archive page, one entry just wont work.But blah, im so tired. And my gf is leaving tomorrow so i need to spend time with her (she can be a cranky pants) :) thanks for letting me know. I hope your ok. love kat

from cufluture :

thanks for the note. Wish I could say I was okay, but I'm not. I tried to call a suicide hotline, but the girl who answered the phone sounded put out and preppy, so I hung up. I obviously just need to be medicated. Which chat room do you go to? (you can email it, if you want). I used to try those, but I got tired of everyone talking about nothing but sex. It was depressing to go to a depression chat room.

from stormyskyz :

i think something similar just happened to me.

from cufluture :

I hope you're doing okay and everything goes smoothly. Take Care.

from confrere :

oh my gosh. Congratulations. It seems to me that he should move out there to support you during this time. I really don't know what to say.

from whykill :

your so smart.. i cant believe i didnt think of shoving the picture off the side of my monitor..

from cufluture :

um, my boyfriend does things like that photo too, only he tries to hide it. I think you should be happy that your boyfriend is up front about who he is. I think all men are like that, really. Probably not what you wanted to hear, but I think it may have some truth. Maybe. I'm also sorry to hear you're so broke. But I can relate. :(

from confrere :

That deujinno diary is hilarious.

from stormyskyz :

i don't think it is. :(

from confrere :

It's good to hear you're out. I hope you're doing better.

from cufluture :

I'm glad to hear that. I got the pictures you sent too, so thanks! They're cool.

from whykill :

:( i cant read your diary from work.. it didnt even occur to me when i was there on the weekend or wherever i viewed it last.. however if one of the sexually repressed loosers that works here walked by i would be on the first bus to suspension vill.. glad i will have my own net in just 17 days..

from cufluture :

I hope you're doing okay, and get to go home soon. Take Care.

from confrere :

It makes me so sad to read these entries. I want you to be okay. I wish I could come see you and give you a hug. Find strength in the people around you, they'll be able to help you more now than anyone else could at this time. I remember when I was in this situation I met some really nice understanding people who were in similar situations. We leaned on each other and helped to support ourselves in a collective effort. Try to listen and receive the help they're trying to give. Keep thinking about your boyfriend and your cats and all the fun stuff you'll be able to do soon. Try not to focus on the past what's going on right now. Always look ahead. Remember that you're beautiful <3_Please stay safe_

from cdghost :

stumbled across your words and enjoyed them very much.. have a good one and two..the cdghost

from confrere :

The template is awesome.

from galaxyrabbit :

love the new layout!

from cufluture :

So I had no idea about that suicide girls site. But, the thing that I found terrible was the quote: "These are girls I can respect." WTF???!!! I'm glad I'm not too updated on pop culture...what about um, personality?

from rattie-pooh :

Hello! My link is not suppose to go back to my old site...your webring link should now be working on my site. :)

from cufluture :

no problem about the email, and thanks for still reading! (They had an article about the comic convention in our paper, I guess it's national news.)

from blurry-kat :

*hugs* do you find it hard thinking of things to put down that u think ppl wont know. I know there are a lot of things that people just dont know about everyone. but when i think to put stuff down i still never know. im just weird., take care kat

from tool-nin-fan :

You're not annoying at all. Send away.

from tool-nin-fan :

Nooooooo. You can't go. You're one of the best.

from darkflora :

oh, I'd miss you! Everyone I actually have gotten to care about is leaving. I understand, though.

from tool-nin-fan :

7/12 entry here may clear some things up.

from darkflora :

ah, I love the cure. I have both their albums. (that's a joke). I'll get the new CD eventually, but thanks for the offer to burn it for me. I'm excited to hear it. They're great musicians, it's only that their live show anymore I think is a bit lacking. I guess compared to NIN, almost anything would be, though. :)

from darkflora :

i have no reason to hate you. I'm sorry to feel this way too. I don't know if I'll write in here anymore, I sound like a complete dumbass. Probably I will, though. I have no other outlet. thanks for all the notes on deviantART too, btw.

from stormyskyz :

:( what are you talking about! i SO don't hate you at all. and no, i never read my notes :) but i just did, and so now i can reply. i'm proud of you, for the 1152x854, however i can recommend even better resolutions if you don't mind. not that there's anything wrong with that one - i used to use it all the time. but trust me ... you will never know the joys of 1280x1024 until you try. and once you try, you will never go back. i do have a deviantART account, i am indeed whatarainylady. i don't know if my crappyass deviations are still there (did i delete them, due to crappiness?) but they probably are. and i hope you haven't seen them yet, they certainly are terrible. i will go check yours out, i hope you have put something up. even if you haven't, i'll drop you a note. and i do update! well... i know i didn't for a while. sometimes when i'm depressed i get apathetic and don't feel like even writing anything at all. go to my livejournal (whatarainylady) because that is the diary have been most frequently updating. other than that, nothing! au revoir for now ma cherie! xoxo

from cufluture :

ha, it is? it's nice to know someone thinks so.

from arjay :

Hiya. I found your diary through my friend blurry-kat. You write really well, and i'm with you, i think passion, for something, *anything* is important to me in another human being. But i suppose not everyone is the same. Well thanks for the interesting read, see you around :)

from cufluture :

it's nice to be back here, but I'm afraid I don't have much worth saying. I could just stay in the bath tub.

from stormyskyz :

that makes me kind of mad. but all of those are exterior things.. you must connect on the inside. it hope it means something that he loves you for what's beneath the surface.

from blurry-kat :

*hugs* i really think you write beautifully. Its sad.. but beautifully written. You know, sometimes we have a set way we like things, and a certain typeof person. then we meet someone who is different and its a good thing. im not making sense.. sorry. take care

from cherrygash :

wicked picture

from blurry-kat :

thanks for the note. im sorry he doesnt hear you, not really hear you anyway. Sometimes i feel like when i speak sound mustnt come out.. *hugs* feel better.. i hope you do and its ok to read my diary :P thanks for the kind note

from margot08 :

Hi! I havent talked to you for a really long time, so i just thought that i would kind of see how you are and say..um...hi! have a nice day! :) :) margot

from darkflora :

I was in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend for a few years, and everytime he didn't call me or write me back soon enough, I freaked out, so I guess that's why I felt like I knew how you were feeling. I hope that you do start to feel better with everything. And just because you have issues to work through doesn't mean you can't or shouldn't be in a relationship at the same time, I think. Issues never stop forming, and if we all waited for that to happen, no one would ever be in relationships ever. I think a lot of times my boyfriend has helped me overcome things that I know I couldn't do on my own. So, that's just my experience with things like that. Oh, and thanks for the comments on my new diary.

from darkflora :

So, I killed tenmileshigh for good this time. It was depressing and lacked focus. I have yet another new diary, if you care to read more of my crap: cufluture.

from darkflora :

I feel like I should maybe give some advice? If I piss you off, I'm sorry. Try to stay calm, this is probably just a new thing to deal with for him, so try to let him adjust to it how he needs to. Don't jump to conclusions, even though I know it's hard to do. I hope you're doing okay. Take Care.

from darkflora :

oh, I hope things work out for you and him, whatever that may require. You deserve to be happy.

from miagoddess :

Thanks for the note...but I don't think I handle freedom (guywise) very well...lol. I'm not going to write about him anymore, so I guess I'll just see where things go. But...thanks again for your input. I really appriciate it. :)

from darkflora :

I was obsessed with the movie Donnie Darko for awhile, and I bugged a friend of mine until she rented it too. I still really like it, even though I've mellowed out some. Have you been to the website for the movie? It's really cool.

from darkflora :

okay, thanks.

from darkflora :

that pass didn't work for me. :(

from stormyskyz :

okay you better! *fist shake

from stormyskyz :

NOW you've gotten ME all excited too!!!! eeeeee!

from darkflora :

since the rain last night, it dropped 29 degrees from yesterday. Typical midwest weather, really. Have fun with your friend. ;)

from darkflora :

thanks for the questions. Oh, and my locked diary entry was wacky, I know. Ha ha.

from lifew0ntwait :

Hey. I made a new diary, off-color-, to start fresh. Just letting you know that I won't be using this one anymore.

from margot08 :

awww, you are really too nice. and my entries arent very great at all, i mean i dont have that much to write about. you put a huge smile on my face! yay! well whenever you get this, i hope you are having a good time! bye! ~margot

from margot08 :

oh, thanks. yes please take my head. you can have it. :) margot

from darkflora :

yeah, I don't know why I do all this shit for people when I secretly want them to DIE! heh. But seriously, thanks, it's nice to be validated for my template work, or any work at all. I hope your friend's visit goes well, I'm happy for you. :)

from darkflora :

haha! Those eyeballs were groovy. Weird they have those metal purses with the silent film star on it. Those were cool too. Thanks, I hadn't seen them before.

from stormyskyz :

:( it gets really hard sometimes, but you just have to keep asking yourself if it's worth it. hopefully you'll know.

from stormyskyz :

i can say i know exactly what you mean.

from darkflora :

glad to hear you're feeling better about things. Also glad you got the zine & liked it. I thought I had destroyed all those poems when I was younger, but my dad found a diskette of mine a few years ago at his house, and those poems were on it. I don't think much of them, but I'm really glad you enjoyed it.

from agitated :

oh i love that song, and especially that line. It's by Azure Ray. so beautiful <3<3

from margot08 :

hi, i have to lock my diary for a bit. my stupid sister keeps reading it...grrr...okay well heres the username and password: summer/lovin

from darkflora :

thanks. You know, we don't argue very often, but when we do it's like WWIII. BTW, I think i understand why you keep looking at her fotolog, but maybe you should to try not to for awhile. She's got freaky sock monkey lips and yeah, no hips.

from stormyskyz :

no shhh.... stop thinking about the lips. they're gross and you know, it doesn't even seem... realistic. look at the picture of her with her mom. they're normal... :( think about more productive or interesting things than some silly girl.

from tenmileshigh :

hmmm...I think it's because he's my friend, not my boyfriend. Guys make good friends, and shitty boyfriends, I think.

from stormyskyz :

lol yeah okay, or, i could make more kickass ones, and give one to you.

from tenmileshigh :

yeah, it's HIM. You'll see, he can really draw. I sent your zine out this afternoon, too.

from a-victoria :

I love the Underworld soundtrack... and I don't think a lot of people know about it, at least where I'm from. It makes me all weak and whimpery. I think I might go get it and listen to it right now.

from darkflora :

thank you. I'm not worried about people having copies of my stories, though. I'm glad you like them enough to waste the ink and paper.

from darkflora :

oh, and thanks for taking the time to read my other story. :)

from darkflora :

Thanks for your interest. I do have #1 finished. (the 1992-1996 one). I'd like, if possible $3 to help cover the cost of making/ mailing it. But if you have some art or another zine to trade, just let me know. If none of that is possible, I'll just send it to you. You can email me: [email protected] and let me know what you want to do. The other 2 should be done very soon. I have the poems sorted, I'm just waiting on a friend to finish some illustrations.

from stormyskyz :

anything long-distance is always extremely hard, and usually disappointing. take it from me. but see him, and make up your mind then. find out if it's worth it before deciding.

from darkflora :

Thank you very much. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it. Most of the other stories on my website are in a similar style, in that most of them are messed up love stories. If you ever want to read something else, they're all up there. Thanks again for reading it.

from darkflora :

thanks for the recommendations.

from darkflora :

I don't even know what "average" IQ is. I don't really take any of those on-line tests seriously, but thanks for thinking I'm intelligent. I've never read ANY stephen king, so I thought I should at least try one of his, since everyone seems to read him. Is there a better one you could recommend?

from a-victoria :

thank you, my darling.

from darkflora :

I guess you don't put yourself down too much, I just think when you do, it's really harsh. Anyway, thanks for what you said about my writing. I just don't feel like I can say what I mean right now, so I'm just writing poetic stuff. I guess I feel if I put it in code, I won't have to deal with it. I'm just going crazy, that's all. :)

from darkflora :

You look beautiful in that photo (on crawl-away). Your eyes are a really cool color. You put yourself down too much, me thinks.

from deaddadaist :

That, or I am bloody drunk.

from deaddadaist :

Aren't I, though? You are sodding right.

from darkflora :

Thank you. I wish I could actually run away to Mexico right now with a friend.

from darkflora :

no, I meant it. I do think you are both strong and beautiful. And I really do love your diary. It's one of the few on here that I can actually relate to and enjoy. Even if I were to stop writing here, I would still come here to read yours. Thanks.

from theladyrisu :

Thank you! >^_^< I was feeling extremely unvalidated today.

from margot08 :

hey how are you? long time, no talk. hope all is well! (i dont really know why i wrote, i just thought i'd see how you are doing)~margot

from obviousman03 :

"Well, I believe in the soul. The cock. The pussy. The small of a woman's back. The hanging curveball. High fiber. Good scotch. That the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a Constitution Amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas eve. And I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days...Goodnight. " :-)

from tenmileshigh :

I really like that painting too. I have a lot of his art on my computer. Him and Waterhouse. Have you been to artmagick.com? That's were I got most of them.

from stormyskyz :

i just read my notes, and would like to make the admission that i am a complete dumbass. i was receiving a ton of notes and didn't see yours. but thank you for not leaving me out of the password goodness. ♥

from darkflora :

thank you very much. I make them too much, I think.

from stormyskyz :

locked eh, good to know.

from tenmileshigh :

oh. okay.

from fraildolbaby :

"fucktard" hahahaha i like that

from ericboy :

Happy 21st Birthday!! I hope it's the best ever.

from darkflora :

that is really freaky weird. And thanks for the trent photolog.

from darkflora :

i forgot about your question on the INFJ personality type. I had to take that test in counceling when I was 7, but I've also taken it on SO many websites, every single time getting INFJ...similarminds.com has several tests that are free and good.

from stormyskyz :

i'm pretty sure gay marriage is legal in canada now. just kind of frowned upon, because everyone are assholes. /rant

from ledhedfek :

theres no law against it as far as i know, but its still a gray area. and no, we don't live in igloos. :)

from ledhedfek :

hey!! you best be not moving in on my girl! *looks intimidating, holds baseball bat (clearly joking)

from stormyskyz :

that is the best proposal ever. ahem: "you spelled duct tape right. let's get married." lol. you're sending so much love my way *blushie* i'll be sending some back. *happy super fun time love shower*

from stormyskyz :

you should know i'm not ignoring you silly! ♥

from ledhedfek :

haha i tell her that everyday in some shape or form, but ill tell her you said so as well. take it easy :)

from ledhedfek :

actually, i am a guy who reads your online journal, but its no concern of mine what you wear at the computer.

from tenmileshigh :

I confronted him about being jealous, and he acted really shocked, like he didn't know he was doing it. Maybe he'll mellow out about it. At least he's not making me miss concerts, that's wacky. I would love a digital camera, we just can't afford to move AND get a camera, and moving is more important right now.

from margot08 :

its okay if you forget who i am and what i say. i dont really expect you to check up on my diary religiously...however, thanks for adding me to your favorites! i now have a grand total of *gasp* 3 readers! ~margot

from darkflora :

hee hee, "unique" is fine. Interesting is fine too, as long as it's coming from someone I actually know a little. thanks for saying you like my new template.

from margot08 :

yeah no problem...i always wondered why everytime i went to read your diary it said this user doesnt exist. anyways, have you read my diary, or did you just see my name? btw, i love your diary!! ~margot

from tenmileshigh :

I just found your message at my alter-ego, for some reason I didn't get an email. hmmm. Yeah, that's my new penpal. I think we were separated at birth. And that Trent photo I liked, it's too true. I think he has a cute little tummy. That makes me sound like a groupie. Oh well.

from fraildolbaby :

yeh you know? thats why i'm saying. but he didn't do anything wrong. oh well. *kisses doll*

from darkflora :

Thanks... I have a really low self-esteem. People in jr. high and high school used to call me ugly all the time, so I guess I still believe them sometimes. 10\13\03...I'm a perve, but hey, you know, he looks nice. Still, that weird hairdo one is one of the best. I feel kinda sorry for him, all these pictures of him as a kid out there. I hope HE doesn't have a low self esteem. heh.

from thissidedown :

hehe, youre nuts. stop eating cheese before bedtime. but awww, babies <3 xx

from darkflora :

hahahahaha, no, I haven't seen that site or those other photos before. That was fun, thanks. (Eh, he's still cute!)

from x-anxiety :

hey L, how have you been lately?

from darkflora :

good, thanks for letting me know.

from miko-sama :

When I went to see APC in November(!), that's how they opened! *shiver, shiver* I know EXACTLY what you mean. >^_^< Maynard = mmmmmmmmm.

from thissidedown :

hehe, we rock <3 xx

from darkflora :

thanks so much! That's trent, in case you didn't recognize him. Also, is that diary locked, because it's supposed to be and it's not acting like it is on my computer.

from darkflora :

I'm glad you enjoy Pat's CD, I'll let him know. I do totally understand about going to "jelly" over a band, singer whatever..I make a total fool of myself. I don't talk about how completely obsessed I am with trent reznor for the same reasons, it's embarrassing. really, the things I've done at NIN concerts are pathetic. oh well. I'm glad you enjoyed the perfect circle show.

from red-gasoline :

Just thought you might like to know I'm back on D-land. Live journal was boring and I missed your little notes. Anyway more explanations on my diary, been updated and a new template. Thanks. XxnicxX

from a-victoria :

I am so so SO JEALOUS that you got to see A Perfect Circle in concert. Oh God. They are coming to TO at the end of April and guess who has exams then? Yep. So I'm heartbroken.

from darkflora :

after reading your experience at the show, I finally don't feel like the only person who freaks out like that at a concert (or about a band). you should have seen me when I saw NIN in omaha, it was pretty pathetic...and, your cats are so cute. Take care.

from darkflora :

thanks for letting me know.

from frankiegyrl :

Hallo! Thanks for filling out my survey! It's so cool to hear about other people's bedtimey things ;) I'd also LOVE to have someone read out loud to me. Sometimes I read out loud to myself when there's no-one else around. The Moomin books are very good for that. Like good comfort food...

from stormyskyz :

cuuuuuuute

from miko-sama :

*mrrr-s* The new template doesn't like outside links, apparently. *brandishes a stick* We'll see about THAT.

from darkflora :

i wondered if that was you who bought his CD, the email looked familiar from somewhere. Thanks again, I hope you like it.

from starke- :

Nota fix.

from stormyskyz :

actually i really rarely use aim, msn is my thing. but i will add you to my list anyway, see how it goes.

from darkflora :

thanks for the passwords. I don't mind the notes, at least you're not an asshole. ha, i never got to see that Adam Ant vampire movie, because they don't have it to rent around here (I live in a hick town). I thought about buying it off amazon.com, thinking it would be under $5 like all the other VHS we buy, but I guess it's rare and they wanted $80 for it!!! (used!) i got a lot of comments on my new diary layout from people who clicked on banners I ran, but they didn't "get it" so I thought I'd just explain it to everyone. Those same people who all added me as a favorite listed me as "interesting" as a comment, so I quoted those lines from that lame diary-story I wrote awhile back (I can't believe you actually read that, let alone remembered those quotes). Seriously though, I am sick of everyone saying I am "interesting." At a certain point, it ceases to become a compliment. I made a layout with custom images for a friend of mine, and I guess she's been getting compliments on it and not mentioning that I made it for her. Maybe it's shallow, but I think that since I worked so hard on it, she could give me credit once in awhile. I'm rambling/ venting. bye.

from stormyskyz :

i'm home, now.

from stormyskyz :

yes m'am (heart)

from stormyskyz :

okay i'm going to speak from personal experience for a moment and hopefully i'll set some sort of example. last summer was the worst one of my life, and i spent LARGE portions of time just staying in bed all day, unmoving, wasting away. my parents didn't even notice that i was never around, they assumed i was out. i was studying the stitching on my comforter and thinking about the pointlessness as well. i lost a lot of weight, because i never ate (gained it back, joy *rolleyes) and had no energy for anything. when school started i realized that i was wasting my time, thinking that if i defied everything i was getting somwhere. but i was only missing out. don't think that if you don't do anything, you're getting something out of it. cause you're not. trust me. (heart)

from darkflora :

what other diary? may i have the password?

from stormyskyz :

<3 email me sometime

from darkflora :

sorry to hear your job is sucking your vital life forces, they tend to do that on occasion. hope things get better soon. my boyfriend has been having to work a lot too. i used to belong to the i love my bed diaryring, but when i went OCD and shortened up my rings, I decided to not keep that one. go figure.

from sigur-ros :

i did take it, thankyou so much for the comment, it means so much <3

from stormyskyz :

stormy admission

from darkflora :

my alter-ego got locked: fetish/call if you'd still like to read. Take care.

from miko-sama :

Wanting someone to "be there" for you isn't pathetic. It's just...the way things are. Everyone needs someone, if only for a little while, for none of us are strong enough to always battle the world on our own.

from x-anxiety :

gosh, babe, i completely forgot about your layout. i'm sooorrryyy.

from stormyskyz :

winter is always tough. wait til spring, and honestly you will feel better and you won't know why. sometimes life isn't about doing something, it's about hanging in there. it will pass. <3

from inaptbeauty :

*smiles* remembers juliet line "what is a name?" .. bleh. you're so hard on yourself dearie. ♥

from stormyskyz :

awww how sweet <3 thank you. i added passionately to my faves. seriously though, <3<3<3

from x-anxiety :

L, I'll make your layout soon. I promise

from stormyskyz :

your note was really flattering, but i'm not sure what you mean by "i'm also at passionately." i don't know what passionately is. uh. i feel kind of dumb now. my other writing is at allpoetry, i will probably link it in the near future. but thanks for the note, and it's so not true, your writing is kickass. i wouldn't have added you if it wasn't. chin up.

from stormyskyz :

it seems you've spent a lot of time preparing for some big perfect sexual moment. don't get me wrong - you will have them.. but if you do that kind of thing this early, you really are only setting yourself up for disappointment. and you're not gross >.< these things take time, and practice. hang in there, babe.

from darkflora :

it took me a minute to figure out what you meant about that picture. Sorry, I didn't even think about it not being suitable for some situations, because it's a drawing. Klimt drew it, btw.

from x-anxiety :

no problem, i'll make your layout in a spiffy!

from x-anxiety :

thanks for IMing me again, L.

from darkflora :

thanks for the movie, I'll have to check it out. what you wrote recently in your diary made me remember that one of my resolutions was going to be to stop saying negative things about myself, but I knew i wouldn't be able to keep that one. sad, but true.

from darkflora :

Oh haha, I can't believe you (or anyone) seriously considered buying me that Adam Ant poster. Do you know the name of the movie where he plays a vampire? I'd really like to see it. Yeah, I'm a pervert now. Totally.

from darkflora :

a good book on shamanism is "The urban Shaman" by Serge Kahili King. It's directed towards people in modern society, obviously. Anyway, you might like it.

from thissidedown :

thank you <3 im back home now, and surprisingly, my parents are being nice. am working on finding a job until september and then im going to reapply to a university closer to home. i still want a degree, just in something i can enjoy. <3 xx

from darkflora :

thanks. I feel I can relate to a lot of what you write in your diary too. I had actually forgot I asked you anything, so don't worry about it.

from fruitzzy :

Hey! Yup, sorry about that, I got it write this time: starke-. Thanks for all yuor compliments and for visiting my site! I really appreciate it!

from darkflora :

thanks for joining my shamanism ring. Just out of curiosity, what aspects of it are you interested in?

from darkflora :

who did that person think they were, "Taxi Driver???" ha ha. Last time I knew, you didn't have to go to college to be a cab driver, anyway. Thanks. BTW, I didn't realize you were a vegetarian, that's cool.

from thissidedown :

yeeeeeeeeeey for pms-ing. everyone on my corridor at college are all on their periods this week, which makes the homesickness even worse. && most of the guys are staying out of our way. <3. xx

from darkflora :

thanks. I watched Dracula again yesterday and decided to put up that photo, I adore that movie.

from fraildolbaby :

haha i took the test you have in your latest entry. that was kind of fun. =)

from cyanide-- :

Your layout is amazing & my new screen name is damsel lost x

from cyanide-- :

Starke;; Darling, I don't know how many times you've heard this over the last month [five times I think] but I promise promise PROMISE that this is the LAST time you'll hear it. My new-diaries binge is finally over, & I promise that I will be here FOR GOOD [even if I decide I hate this name] so thank you so many times love, for being here for me [even though we hardly talk] and remember that I'll love you for forever and ever. [jessica]

from whykill :

how do you do the little hearts? is it like this: <3 or is there more magic to it then that? the great part about cold is finding ways to get warm..

from whykill :

can i make another request? since i have been known on occasion to post more then one entry per day.. can i have a little history doodad like you do? i know i ask alot.. i am so demanding.. feel free to slap me around a little.. just make sure you tie me up too.. <p>Slave

from sweetliar :

It's not that I didn't like the template, in fact, I really liked the simplicity. It's just that I can't seem to get anything to work correctly. I am sure I will come back soon. I have a friend who uses this in my school and I may ask her to help me out when we get back. Thank you again! -MJ

from stormyskyz :

lol np. let me know what you come up with.

from stormyskyz :

i'm glad you implemeneted my template. do you think you could make my design link a little more visible though? thanks, Amineh

from stormyskyz :

AH HAHAHA. oh aragorn. *hand flap* on a more serious note, i agree. dork. plus by that time i was practically pissing my pants.

from sweetliar :

Thank you for helping me out. You don't need to rush with the html, I don't want you to get in trouble at work! Thanks again :-D

from sweetliar :

Yeah...I can't figure out how to show all my entries because I am a sped when it comes to computers. If you could explain it I would love to try and fix it so you could read them. Thanks!

from mystical76 :

Oh! Right after I signed your guestbook, I saw that you had left me a note! Yaaaay! Hey, I love how purple your layout is! You can never have too much purple!

from stormyskyz :

it's yours. i need your email though, so i can send you the code. if you don't want to post it in my notes, hit me at [email protected] -Amineh

from stormyskyz :

nobody's using it, i just made it because i felt like it lol. would you like it?

from shortbow :

My pleasure! Thanks for offering such a great ring. To be honest, whether animals have souls is one of those things that I have gotten in arguments with people over. So, when I saw your ring, I just had to join. :) I'm looking forward to reading through your diary and everyone elses in the ring!

from stormyskyz :

delicious entry today.

from piecesof8 :

Hi there, this is Pieces of Eight, a new fanlisting for avid Pirates of the Caribbean fans. Would you care to join? Please check it out!

from iluvtunes :

Ya wanna know how to REALLY make a heart? Type in &heart; and then put an s in between the t and ; It will end up looking like this ♥

from stormyskyz :

i duno... i can't seem to hold down any diary but stormyskyz :S i don't really know why. i'm going to take the writing from the other one and save it though, in case someone is interested someday.

from stormyskyz :

i can be your friend :)

from laurelote :

Hi! Thanks for joining my [Captain!] Jack Sparrow diaryring, mate! ^_^

from diseasedkid :

hmmm thank you for the note. I don't have much more to say.... anyhow i have to go right now ... Bye

from thissidedown :

:) thank you. im on a five week vacation for christmas so i get to spend as much time as i can with him <3 xx

from isopropyl :

hey, thanks for leaving me a note. yes, i did design my site. thanks. :D i see you are a fan of tool.. i enjoy them quite a bit as well.

from mikesgurl2 :

Thanks. I will turn my notes on ASAP.

from lovemetwice :

you should never be jealous of me. of anything i have. you're. far more than amazing. xo.

from stormyskyz :

thanks :) if you ever want a template come to me lol

from scorpionkiss :

you make me feel empty & inadequate, im barely even worthy of your shadow. youre so fucking brilliant & amazing. intensely, admiringly, <3eva

from five-lashes :

just letting you know that this is my new home. [jessica]

from lenisaren :

you don't sound perverted at all. thank you *smiles and blushes*

from andwebreathe :

haha! Well I appreciated it anyways. 1. I get an e-mail 2. I get to check out more diaries 3. I get to smile ♥ spelling shmelling

from x-anxiety :

[thank you L]

from thissidedown :

it was orignially a chili's template, but i took the photo away && changed the colours && its got no releveance to it at all now.. but im still not sure about it, there's something missing <3 xx

from lenisaren :

probably. i'm paranoid about people i know in 'real-life' finding it. i'll send you the password though ^^

from moongazer17 :

well that would explain it. by the way, i like your diary and your username is really nifty. later love.

from thissidedown :

happier entries will start in eighteen days - when im back home <3 xx

from thissidedown :

hehehe.. the fact you had to add the time & date shows me that i update my diary far too much.. and yeh, being mixed up && confused && feeling upside-down && inside-out sucks a lot.

from moongazer17 :

hey darling, thanks for the note. cutting upsets me, i don't understand it. how did you find my diary?xxCrystlexx

from fraildolbaby :

yes, isn't it incredibly funny how that works. talk about being messed up. oh well, i guess you have to do what you have to do. (or something like that)

from thissidedown :

hehe, it made me laugh a whole lot.. and i just had to use it while i waited for ideas for people from customs.. i love it! xx

from thissidedown :

heyy.. i think it does look pretty good just plain, but ive had a few offers of custom designs so i might see what other people have to offer! hehe, thank you <3 xx

from x-anxiety :

yet another note. [as you said, notes make you happy. && God knows you deserve to be happy.]

from x-anxiety :

talking to you makes me happy. thanks again and again.

from x-anxiety :

to me. [heartscars&bruises] Jessica

from x-anxiety :

and again until you come back

from x-anxiety :

i will post again

from x-anxiety :

i still miss you.

from x-anxiety :

i miss you L.

from thissidedown :

yeh.. i had that same relief when i woke up that i get from cutting, then i smiled because i didnt have scars.. although, it took a lot of soap to get them off my arms this morning. ive kept one on my ankle just because i dont want to forget what i wrote.. <3 xx

from stormyskyz :

thank you, very very much.

from miko-sama :

*sends over a plate of cookies and a few casseroles to help with the move* =^_~=

from thissidedown :

<3 thank you.. im very happy nxx

from x-fragility :

you were on someone's favourites. <3<3

from x-fragility :

you're awesome. <3<3<3<3

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