messages to sunstargirl:
(click here to add new message):

from jumblygiant :
I just read your last few entries, and I am so sorry you have to go through this. I'll be thinking of you. xoxoxox
from randomrabbit :
Congratulations to you both! Really happy news. I often have leftover curry for breakfast but I don't have the excuse of being pregnant, just a fat chuff.
from nessus :
I'm sorry I still haven't gotten around to reading that one :( I do remember reading the Wikipedia article about it. As I recall there were a few alien species with differing traits.
from sexyatheist :
i love your picture filled updates! glad to hear (and see!) you had such a great time at your shower.
from sexyatheist :
i'm so sorry to hear about your step-mom. and the pain your family is going through. my thoughts are with you.
from tithonus :
The image appears to temporarily be down, which is perhaps the reason for the sadness ever having managed to take hold in the first place. ;)
from nessus :
Heck yes! Thanks. Heh, I feel like I have to get this story out before everything I've written about is no longer sci-fi.
from nessus :
Very much agreed. To be clear, if the guy genuinely isn't of sound mind, then none of what I said applies. I think it's a lot of things. I think a major part of it is the fucked up way violence is promoted almost as a virtue in the US. It's perfectly fine to show someone killing half a dozen "badguys" in a prime time television show, but the moment you even hint at nudity everyone freaks out. And I realize it's anecdotal but then I read a news story like the one about the awful man in Florida who shot an unarmed salesman to death for knocking on his door.
from nessus :
Hehe, yeah I was shocked when I saw like, $3 bottles of wine last time I was in the States. BC is particularly bad for alcohol prices.
from jumblygiant :
I'm crying for you and your brother. My heart breaks for him. That is so fucking unfair. I'm so terribly sorry to hear that happened. I will (seriously) keep him in my prayers.
from nessus :
Heyo! Weird question, but down by the waterfront near the Seattle Aquarium, when you go down the hill, I seem to remember there being this like, raised wooden train platform a few blocks from the shore, next to another raised concrete bridge/road for cars. I thought it looked cool cause it reminded me of like Gotham City. Do you have any idea what I'm talking about, and do you know if it's still there?
from nessus :
:( I got a new computer and lost the log in details for this diary. Could you possibly email them to me again? [email protected]
from nessus :
"The doctor was in like her early 20s" rather.
from nessus :
The parts that stand out for me are: when the ridiculously young doctor was standing there telling us our mother was going to die, how the cancer had spread to her lungs. The doctor was in link her early 20s. It's weird being older than people in professions you associate with being authoritative. And then in the hospice, the Catholic priest giving her last rights at the insistence of our grandmother, speaking Latin, but it was routine for him, he went through it briskly and without reverence, it seemed.
from nessus :
What's even better, it'd be like if the President *told* the Democratic Party how to vote, and they were not allowed to vote differently, or they'd be kicked out of the party. Joy.
from nessus :
Our system is sorta fucked up because we vote for the equivalent of the House Of Representatives and the President at the same time with the same vote, that is, we don't vote on our leader directly, we vote for their party. If their party wins, then they become Prime Minister. It'd be like if the Democrats won the House, then the leader of the democrats would become President. And we don't get to vote for our Senate, they're appointed. Ugh.
from opposure :
Hello, it seems you've been locked for a little while and i honestly can't remember if i've ever asked you for your password. Could I have one? If so, could you click on my email link in my journal and email it to me? :) in any case, I hope things are mostly bearable and sometimes wonderful for you.
from sexyatheist :
well Fergie is their mom. well you know, the original Fergie, Duchess of York, not the singer. she was definitely a bit on the crazy side so it wouldn't surprise me if her daughters were a bit crazy too. and therefore, super fun to hang out with!
from sexyatheist :
well yes, of course there is always that. i just try and ignore that fact because it's so damn weird that anyone believes that. and then celebrates with colored eggs and bunnies and chocolate. but i do love the chocolate part
from sexyatheist :
oh no! i'm so sorry honey.
from nessus :
Shit. I hope you find something else soon and that the transition is as painless as possible.
from sexyatheist :
ah, you're so sweet my friend. thanks for that. soon enough i'll be okay.
from nessus :
Somehow I didn't notice until just now that I never ended up adding you to my buddy list; I thought you just updated really infrequently or something. Rest assured this oversight has been remedied.
from opposure :
Thanks! I will endeavor to do so. I hope you are well.
from nessus :
SUCH a good movie. That damn daffodil scene makes me cry every single time. And the end when they're rushing to the river. *sigh* In my mind, THAT is a romantic movie.
from sexyatheist :
i think you look absolutely beautiful! and not trashy at all. it looks really great.
from nessus :
You can bet I noticed that too (I'm picky about my boots). These ones are made for jumping out of an airplane!
from legolass :
bloody hell that film sounds amazine! must download/rent! *sigh*
from opposure :
Thanks. So, I guess your diary is locked for now?
from sexyatheist :
i must respectfully disagree. i enjoy most green candies, almost as much as the red ones. sour green apple flavored candies are especially delicious. but my favorite is blue. all blue flavored candies are the best
from nessus :
Definitely, definitely finish DS9. Honestly I'd say start from the beginning and watch it start to finish, due to the show's serial nature. DS9's easily my favorite, due to the complex, mature plot arcs that spanned the entire series. It was also shot exceptionally well, with amazing cinematography and scene composition. One of the head writers went on to create the new Battlestar Galactica. TNG does the "open road" exploration thing the best, I think, but DS9 has the most developed characters, who actually change over the course of the series. TOS was also fun. Pretty much hated Voyager, and Enterprise is at about the same level of sloppy, clumsy writing. Heh, and favorite Trek movies are Undiscovered Country and then the new one.
from nessus :
But just look at the way DS9 ended! Rom was Grand Nagus, and he was instituting things like social security, etc., and they'd already expanded womens' rights under the previous Nagus. It'd be neat to see a Tea Party-like Farengi movement, a little darker (especially in light of recent real world events), threats on progressive politicians, etc. Then you have Romulus being destroyed in the new Trek movie, decapitating the Romulan Star Empire. And Gow'ron ran the Klingon Empire into the ground before he was assassinated, so it'll take some time for them to recover. And the Federation emerge from the Dominion War as the sole superpower in the quadrant, with more warships than at any other point in their history, there has to be at least *some* reluctance to dismantle their war machine. Such a rich playground left to explore in the "contemporary" main continuity Trek universe.
from nessus :
Figured it out!
from nessus :
Thank you! Ack! I'm not sure how to delete, though!
from nessus :
Verymuchagreed. DS9 will always be my favorite, though. If I were super rich I'd make a spiritual successor series to DS9, set like a decade later, with a decapitated Romulan Star Empire, decimated Cardassia, victorious and considerably more militarized Federation, worn out Klingon Empire, socialist Farenganar, etc. /nerd
from nessus :
They're doing it again: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11945952 God these people are unbelievably out of touch.
from nessus :
Ha! I actually enciuntered a blinking green for the first time last week and was similarly puzzled. I think it's a Vancouver thing.
from nessus :
Yeah, I'm from Canada, specifically Calgary. I think it's cause it's a very humid, damp cold in San Fran. I've been to Seattle, but not during winter. Bit of a culture shock, small differences. Oh, I hate your guys' money; it all looks the same and $1 bills are worthless. You guys really need to switch over to dollar coins, heh.
from nessus :
It's colllllldddd. It was warmer than this last time I was here. Also: the US is weirdddddd
from legolass :
awww he is bootyfull and all grown up!!! i was doing a similar thing with pics of my bunnies as babies the other day - they are now about 9 months old which in bunny years is all grown up too!! :'-( they're still adorable though! happy belated thanksgiving! xx
from nessus :
I think more than anything I'm enamored with the image I have of university/college that I have in my head influenced principally by TV shows and movies. I actually applied to art school two years in a row and was rejected (thankfully, in retrospect) both times. Then I just stumbled across my current career (live sound engineer) when a friend was getting out of that scene and needed someone to take over. I operate in this limbo between having an employer and running my own business; I have my own equipment and sometimes I do sound for weddings and such in addition to live bands and DJs in community centers and halls but I also work in nightclubs. Can't claim to have any intimate knowledge of *how* to run a business, but I'm not bankrupt (yet), either.
from nessus :
Incredibly well put.
from nessus :
It is for us, but the universe got along just fine without us for billions of years. In broad strokes that entry was in response to the feeling of entitlement that results in us asking why our lives suck so much on occassion, as if the universe owes us, when the truth is the unbelievably vast majority of the universe is not only inhospitable to life, but downright hostile towards it.
from boyecho :
she's married and has a kid. she's quite a bit older than me. i just thought it neat her family has stuck around this city. they're great people.
from sexyatheist :
i agree with legolass. you are not a fat cow, you never were and you never will be. and part of being a healthy individual is being happy. which means sometimes, eating a hot chocolate cookie. you don't always have to deny yourself and you shouldn't. here's a big internet HUG my friend.
from legolass :
You are neither fat nor a cow. don't be soooo silly. You are beautiful (and/or photogenic - either way i am very jealous of you!) Unless we were all millionaires, money will always be an issue - it doesn't matter how much you have or don't, it will never be enough. David and i struggle with that fact sometimes but untimately we try not to let it affect our relationship and most of all we try not to make decisions on what we do in life based on finance. Some would call this reckless and shortsighted but i think if you worry too much about money, you will never do any of the things you want to in life and these things always seem to work themselves out somehow! you guys look and sound like a lovely couple and you're obviously far too strong to let something like this affect you (but i'm sure you already knew that. feel better :-) xxx
from sexyatheist :
i understand both of those points. but neither one convinces me to completely tie my life to someone else's. i don't want that level of responsibility for anyone else's choices.
from boyecho :
i think they realize that regardless of how well/bad economies are, people will still need to escape and be entertained.
from sexyatheist :
if by modern day romeo and juliet you mean highly dysfunctional but madly, stupidly in love, i'll accept it! btw, i don't have him listed but i absolutely adore Haruki Murakami. so talented!
from legolass :
Lol the first words out of my mouth were �Are you serious?� too!! How funny! I wasn�t a �planning my wedding since I was 3� kind of girl either � not at all � it�s amazing how quickly these things come together in your head, especially when you�re with someone who has all the same tastes/styles as you so you are quite happy to let them run with their ideas as well as your own. Congratulations for the zillionth time! Xx PS � I�m not surprised you loved my dress, half the pictures in your last entry were really similar to it haha!! I posted the designer on your Facebook for you to check out if you�d like to... their range of dresses with a bit of colour in are especially fabulous if you like that sort of thing � if I hadn�t already found the dress of my dreams I would definitely have chosen one!But it looks like you�ve got plenty to choose from already :-)
from sexyatheist :
oh sweetie, the ring is beautiful! and it sounds like it's perfect for you. thanks for posting a picture. and NG's mom was diagnosed with cancer. so now i'd feel like an asshole ignoring his calls. le sigh
from sexyatheist :
YAY! congratulations my friend, that is so damn exciting! i can't wait to see all of the amazing pictures!
from sexyatheist :
oh no honey, i am so so so so so so so sorry. i can't even imagine how devastating that is. i wish there was something i could do.
from legolass :
can i be your friend on facebook?? do you have a fun exciting name thats make you easy to find.... mine is ella tamsen martin, my profile pic is me in a funky silver grey dress (at my HEN DO! Wooo!) and i'm very blonde. practically white blonde in that pic actually! i am sorry to hear about the conversations with bear, i admit i was very shocked.... you two seem (from my reading at least lol!) like about the last people i would ever expect to be talking about things like that! i'm sure things will be ok. xx
from sexyatheist :
thank you for the birthday wishes! and i'm glad to hear you had such a great trip, i loved reading about it. though i'm sorry to hear about the break-up/marriage conversation. that sounds really tough. HUG
from tithonus :
Thanks! You did give them to me before, I know because when you gave them to me again I immediately recognised them. :)
from sexyatheist :
you look amazing and i love the new clothes! and for the record, i thought you also looked great in those vegas pics. as for posting pics, it's your blog and i think it's totally fine.
from boombasticat :
I know, cyclists should just suck it up and wear bright stuff. And I know that biking is essentially a defensive thing in which you're trying not to get hit by a car. I just hate those helmets so much. I'm probably going to get a skateboarding-style helmet. In any event, I need to get your username and password again. How should I do this?
from boyecho :
i know conversations like that very well. my friend, who is also a pisces, and i can never decide on what to do or where to go. it never really matters so much as just the act of 'doing' or 'going' is usually enough. p.s. vaguely looking at seattle for work/etc. doing research.
from sexyatheist :
you're right. sometimes the situation just feels so overwhelming, i worry we won't be able to.
from tithonus :
Thanks! I feel better today! Also, all these sentences end in exclamation points! Also, I lost your password, can you email it to me again!
from sexyatheist :
god i love your photographs. they are always so beautiful.
from sexyatheist :
congratulations on losing 10 pounds! that's fantastic!
from sexyatheist :
i like the outdoor shot as well because it looks more interesting but i think the burger is shown off a bit better without it. glad to hear it was so good!
from sexyatheist :
i know i'm a broken record but seriously, your pictures are always so beautiful. i have no idea what HDR is but those pics look amazing. the one of the pool at Caesar's was so cool!
from sexyatheist :
i love las vegas and i loved your pictures! i can't wait to see them all.
from sexyatheist :
that actually does give me hope because it is really tough. not impossible but you definitely have to be really committed to even try it. it's nice to hear that two people made it work! and btw, that message from your little sister is adorable.
from antipodean :
Haha glad you guys liked the link :D I'm definitely getting the assassin vibe from my cat right now!
from tithonus :
Thanks!
from tithonus :
It's a book about... caring for your soul? I'm not sure why I thought of it... I remember you saying something a while ago about how much you liked Ishmael - that's right, isn't it? Anyway, it's an unusual book but there's a lot that's good in it. I recommend it. :)
from tithonus :
Have you read/heard of a book called "Care of the Soul" by Thomas Moore?
from sexyatheist :
oh no, you poor thing! well i'm glad it was nothing too serious and that Bear is taking good care of you. i hope you heal well.
from tithonus :
Thanks! I'm not sure how long it will last, but I guess we'll see what happens...
from sexyatheist :
ha! that is a good point, because if i recall correctly from the first time i heard about her, it was pretty good sex. thank you for pointing that out! makes me feel less irritated about it.
from sexyatheist :
i love them all, every picture is stunning! the second one, of the elephant, the framing just gets me for some reason. and happy birthday, i'm glad you had such a great day.
from i-am-jack :
You are going to find this amusing. Yes, she is white and my friend at work with the trained child is black. He grew up in the south and is not going to have his kid acting out. He wants to move back down there eventually, so she gets a more mannered upbringing.
from boyecho :
not as exciting as it seems.. it's just networked to the board through a wireless router... how's the kitten? rambunctious?
from justnick :
I'd actually be really interested to see that documentary, I'm going to check that out. There's a class at my school called "Men and Masculinist theory" that I really wanted to take, but unfortunately you have to be a anthropology major to take it. Bluh. Also, for the record, I love your comments!
from sexyatheist :
that's really great advice, thank you. you're right, bottling it up certainly isn't helping and it will blow up if i don't talk to him about it. it's just especially hard after his crap about dealing with stuff on your own. i've tried but it's just not cutting it! he's always been great when i need to talk to him about stuff, i'm not sure why i'm fighting this so much.
from boyecho :
kitten is cute. cuuuute. teach it to love water. i think he's young enough!
from antipodean :
Feldspar is a freakin' awesome name for kitty (who, by the way, is outrageously cute and gorgeous!) Congrats on the new addition to the family :D We have two kitties of our own, Guenhwyvar (or Guen for short), a very loooong, oversized (but not fat) black cat I named for a magical panther from a very geeky set of fantasy books. Our other, younger, cat is a black and white 'tuxedo' kitty named Othello. Which we thought just sounded 'right' at the time :)
from legolass :
ooohhhh myyy gooooddddd he is boootyfull!!!!!! i want to come over there and steal him!! you know i was thinking how the other day i wished you lived over here because i've been looking at wedding photographers (oh yeah i got engaged btw :p) and i want youuuuuuu! :-( xx
from jumblygiant :
he's sooo adorable. oh, kittens. they are my kryptonite. I tend to prefer human names, although I have know idea why. I end up calling my cats by various names. here's a name generator http://www.lowchensaustralia.com/names/generators.htm I would advise against the "Afghan Terrorist Name Generator" though. what the hell? xo.
from sexyatheist :
congratulations, he's adorable!
from antipodean :
Thanks, yeah I've been making a lot of observations lately in terms of the level of commitment called upon in having children. It's intense, to say the least. And I still feel quite far away from wanting to take that on. I'm 27 this year, so I guess I don't have too much more time to work it out so to speak, but I've always needed to do things in my own time. If it's going to be a part of our lives, it will need to be 100% planned and we need to be in the right financial position and frame of mind. There's still so much other life stuff I feel we both need to do before we're at that point. But, as they say, if it's meant to be it will work out. If not, not a big deal!
from sexyatheist :
i'm getting my doctorate in clinical psychology.
from boyecho :
woah, that's a great christmas present for him! i'm jealous.
from sexyatheist :
i love those pics! i'm so glad you post them, you're really talented. and i just caught up and your boss sucks. you deserve better.
from antipodean :
Haha! It's good to know there are others out there who have experienced gym neurosis ;D
from antipodean :
You are so wonderfully right! I do feel so much better :)
from singledadguy :
It TOTALLY sucks when a TV show jumps off a cliff like that, and I am sorry that it is so. I have enjoyed the few episodes that I have watched, so if I were to run out and pickup a couple of the seasons of the show, which ones would I want, and where should I just give up as its no longer any good? With regard to your experiences with addicts - Liv, your strength is impressive, and I say, regardless of her attitude (the girl who's life you saved) - well done. :) If she cant see the help you gave, f*ck her. I have no patience for that kind of crap anymore. ;)
from singledadguy :
I am not, by any means, a fan of house. BUT... everyone grows up eventually Liv. They grow up or die. By grow up I mean kick the habbit that is killing them. I happen to know more alcoholics and drug-addicts (many of whom are recovering) than I care to, and the one true thing among them is, once they hit rock bottom, they got clean/sober and changed their life. Also, if your best friend in the world (other than Bear) needed your support, wouldnt you move in together and help them out? Be supportive? Having read you for over a year, I feel comfortable saying I think you would. Besides, its very rare that they 180 a character like this without a plan. Be prepared - from the few episodes I have seen, I can say that if they are "lulling" you, its going to be a WHAM! right in the kisser sort of punch they throw you when things are "regrown" so to speak.
from antipodean :
haha, that's a good theory! :D
from i-am-jack :
It is. That one of the things I miss most about writing here all the time. Five days used to be a long time.
from i-am-jack :
Thank you. I honestly was not sure if I even wanted to post that. I just sat down and typed whatever came out of my head. I have not done that in a long time. I'm glad you liked it.
from legolass :
thanks :-) for the password and the comment about my name lol! i quite like it too! i'm sorry to hear that those women at your work are being b!tches but look on the brightside (although knowing you, i'm sure you already are!) you have a lovely boyfriend, a lovely new apartment AND a big fat pay rise haha! plus you're your boss' favourite :-) all good things. i move tomorrow! yay!!! xx
from singledadguy :
I got it! :) ty!
from legolass :
ahh... hook me up with a password?? pretty please :-)
from sexyatheist :
email has been sent and note deleted. thank you and i hope all is well.
from singledadguy :
=O LOCKED!! =( Can i possibly get a peek?
from sexyatheist :
i'm glad i'm not the only one! i can see how guys play with it all of the time too. it's just so cool. and, password protected? any chance i can get me one of those?
from sexyatheist :
those pictures are absolutely beautiful! i love them all and i'm not just saying that because i think your diary is awesome. honestly, they are fantastic. and thanks for your comment. i don't think we have much of a chance but we'll see what happens.
from legolass :
i know that feeling! i'm working two jobs now to help with the deposit for the flat - it's like do a 9 hour day at main job, go straight to the pub and do a 6 hour shift, crawl into bed at midnight and get back to work for 7 the next day. arg... where are boyfriends, friends and family supposed to fit into that??? LOL. ah well at least its (hopefully) a temporary situation for me. hopefully things will get better for you now the stress of moving is over!! xx
from antipodean :
I'm so sorry to hear about the bad work situation. Hope you're going okay!
from singledadguy :
Im sorry things are sucking on the job front - boht finding a new one and a bad situation at the current one. =( Hopefully it doesnt go on any longer. Its a new day - keep your chin up (and all the other positive thought phrases)
from legolass :
i'm glad you love your new apartment!! we're moving into a new 'flat'(!) in 3 weeks too - it's the same as you said, all grown up and shiny... i'm so excited!! post photos!! xx
from sexyatheist :
thank you. though i'm sorry i caused you to tear up, i appreciate knowing that my words made someone feel something. p.s. i'm sorry to hear your work is so terrible. i hope that it gets better.
from singledadguy :
Uh huh... YOU guys just wanted the uber-good candy bars and saltwater taffy :D
from sexyatheist :
I don't really disagree to be honest. But we broke up because he knows he'll never move to Texas and doesn't want to be in a long distance relationship for 5 years. We didn't break up because we don't love each other but because I moved away. It sucks but I don't doubt he believes those things but the reality is that they don't change the situation. Overall it's just a sucky situation.
from antipodean :
Haha, yeah I think it's a relative kind of thing. The way I figure, in places where winter is the most extreme, it makes sense that winter is classically going to be the season that screws the most with people's equilibrium. In places where summer is the most extreme, I'd hazard to say summer-related seasonal depression is higher, for people who are especially sensitive to the heat. I think there are some newish studies coming out on this, mapping seasonal affective problems by people's relative distance from the equator. I totally understand the winter blues though, for people living in colder climes. When I was in London and Paris over the winter a couple of years ago, it was like everyone was in a permanent bad funk -- an icy mood to match the icy, low-light weather. I love winter -- not as much as I love autumn, mind you -- but I know that if I lived for a while in a colder climate I'd probably get depressed in winter too. Where I'm living though, summer has always gotten me down. It saps my energy like nothing else. And actually makes me feel fairly anxious at the same time. It's not a great time of year for me. I'm very much a milder weather kind of gal.
from sexyatheist :
we really do have a lot in common! Daniel Quinn is amazing, it's nice to meet someone else who appreciates his genius. and i just moved here from california and it is tough. but i decided to go to grad school in an insanely competitive area and had to move wherever i got in. which unforunately for me, is texas. and that's not me on my profile, her name is Kelly Brook and she's a beautiful British model.
from zootdroop :
I didn't know you left me a message I never check my messages here I totally forget about them and no one ever leaves me any anyway. I'm glad I inspired you to make some videos, something good came out of me trying to do it at least. You seemed fine in yours, unlike me, I came off as a emotionless zombie. I am going to try and make another one, maybe today but I'm not in the mood right now. I have trouble enough talking to people in real life, you would think it would be easier on here and talking to no one, but it's harder in a way. Anyway, make some more videos, maybe it will get me to make some more. Oh and I liked the other video, nice job.
from boyecho :
just one, and it's on my back. it's related to buddhism. i'm very not hardcore. i do have another soapstone elephant my mom brought me back from mexico of all places. a guy was carving it and it wasn't finished yet but she wanted him to sell it to her unfinished.
from boyecho :
yeah. that would be my next (and final) one. don't know if i could find an artist i trust enough... it's funny uou posted the moving video, i was just unpacking a box a few nights ago and found my elephants, including the white one with the elephant inside like yours.
from singledadguy :
HI! :D
from antipodean :
Hi! Love the vid :D You should totally bring in a few video entries here and there!
from boyecho :
of course! i've got a few friends there, i'd love to spend a few days wandering about.
from singledadguy :
Grats on the great find! ;) Hope that works out for you guys!
from boyecho :
I guess i am very cynical about work in that fashion. I didn't mean to be so negative, i do wish you good luck in finding something new, with people that are worth your time.
from boyecho :
people do not succeed and move up based on merit or performance. they ascend ranks by failure. these people are promoted to make those that promote them look that much better. while people with great skill sets that succeed and do fantastic jobs are ignored, cast aside, and left to wallow at the same pay rate until they decide to leave. good luck!
from i-am-jack :
Well it will probably sound stupid, but the cat I had since I was a kid died a few years ago in the fall. I had been burning a pumpkin spice candle almost constantly those last few weeks. My therapist loves pumpkin spice. I got her a candle and one for myself too. I have not burned it since and probably never will. That candle especially would smell like death. The worst part was I was not expecting my cat to die then. He had been terminally ill, but then just suddenly took a turn for the worse. It was expected yet unexpected.
from boyecho :
no adamantium here. but, i'm a pretty rapid healer. i just have strange luck. it's never a horrible injury. just lots of little annoying ones.
from legolass :
yes yes YES!! i agree with everything you just said regarding religion... thank god!! let me know if he sends you his tape haha! x
from boyecho :
perfectly fine. just got a lot bruised and a little bloody.
from singledadguy :
OMG LMAO!! You made me spit out my coffee laughing :D
from singledadguy :
Wow... I think I am stunningly offended since I live in Middle America. ty so much. =\
from antipodean :
Abou your latest entry, the photos for your photography site all look fab! But if I had to make a choice between them, I'd say I'm the biggest fan of images 1, 4 and 5. Especially number 1!
from antipodean :
Thanks. It's probably been over the past month - and after reading 'Beyond Civilisation' particularly - that I've been offered an insight into how Quinn's ideas inform my research. For all the flaws of the written style of 'Beyond Civilisation', there are many great ideas within it, very relevant to exactly what I've been looking at in my PhD. Thanks again for introducing his works to me :)
from xxholding-on :
hey i saw you were online and i really wanted the vote from diaryland members towards an art contest i joined. It's a coach marketing contest and i need as many votes as i can get, please help! http://www.brickfish.com/Pages/PhotosAlbums/PhotoView.aspx?picid=975395_34070543&pid=2767347&scid=452
from boyecho :
when i asked him about it, he said "the buddha says drinking takes away your smart. me, i don't mind so much." which is a pretty perfect answer.
from boyecho :
Had to think hard about that, but definately my friend and i hanging outside of a temple my first night there, and being invited by a monk to go have tea at his house. he explained in pretty good english how much he liked whiskey and good beer. he was funny and absurdly kind.
from singledadguy :
I am sooo friggin jealous - YOU WENT TO THE MAGIC CASTLE!!! :D Its one of the few places in California I am actually interested in seeing! :D My buddy's 4 yr-old son has developed a cutsie thing as well... he says all the time "You're being anoring" (not a typo). Its his favorite saying at the moment. Anoring... that kills :P right along with "Its not listening..." :) Glad you had a good time with the family, and hope the weather breaks soon!
from antipodean :
My birthdate song was 'Down Under' by Men at Work too. Apt, considering my country of birth :D
from antipodean :
Haha, yeah that's what I told my brother too! He wanted to distinguish privatised ownership from State ownership/sovereignty interests -- which is fair enough in one respect, but doesn't really get the 'point'. But meh, it's hard broaching such issues with him when he comes from a perspective which is almost diametrically opposed to mine. Thanks for elucidating 'Beyond Civilisation' :) I've put it on order with my brother (who, lucky for me, manages a book shop). I'll definitely approach it as a non-fiction work, and see how it goes. Been very interested in sustainable practices and living lately, but really am only beginning to scratch the proverbial surface. Thanks! All the best, PJ
from antipodean :
Heya Livie. How've you been? I was just wondering if you've read "Beyond Civilization"? (Probably a silly question!) I've been thinking of getting it, but would you recommend it as being 'up there' with the other staples of Quinn's work?
from urbancadence :
Thank you for your virtual hugs :'-) *sob*
from singledadguy :
I think its more about drown-out the noise around us. For those that wear head phones. I have an ear bud/piece for my crackberry. Yes........ I get the calls at all hours. Better that than my hand on the phone, or my head cocked at a funky angle... :D
from singledadguy :
House on the Rock, Wisconsin. Its an amazing place that is stunningly eclectic and beautiful to tour. All kinds of great things to see and strange collections to view. http://www.thehouseontherock.com/HOTR_AreaInfo_Attractions.htm < link to it :D Also, in Chicago, The Art Institute i think you would be especially interested in. :) There are a crap ton of small places to come and see here in the area, and most require about a day to actually enjoy. Come see us!
from bobbiedylan :
neither of you has been to chicago?! doubleyouteaeff.
from randomrabbit :
You're welcome to come live in it! Rent free but I would expect you to lay the occasional egg.
from justnick :
...that sounded way less emo in my head, honest.
from justnick :
That's why I Love the rain, though, see? Makes it easier to pretend that the rest of the world isn't there, and not think about women at all.
from singledadguy :
Unfortunately for me, I cant stand House. The character is too much of a big whiney baby for my taste. Ive watched several episodes and he kinda grates on my nerves. Best Written Show EVAH, however, is (by FAR!) West Wing.
from l-alle :
!!!! im so thrilled/touched/giddy/excited/over-the-moon that you thought of me! AND its a lovely picture and my new desktop wallpaper! xoxo
from boyecho :
aye. i'm hoping. though, i'm realizing more and more i think i'm meant for a smaller town. half a million people is intimidating. nevertheless, that city is the top of my list.
from singledadguy :
The thing of it is (about ST) is that new fans are now going to go WTF about the timelines. In the mid-1990's Marvel decided that Spiderman was too boring and introduced the Clone Saga. It became rediculously over-complex, and started out in a similar fashion. Revamping the timeline and the history and changing the continuity. They did this across the board in their top-titles and tried to put things back again years later. I believe the inheritors of Star Trek are making the same mistake. Interestingly, The Federation has a division in the Future directly related to ensuring the timeline. Sort of a Time-Cops kind of thing, specifically so that this sort of thing doesnt happen. Nice pics btw.
from singledadguy :
Nope... because they erased the entire history of ST. I read the books as well as watch the movies and the TV shows, and they just totally wiped out the continuity of the story lines that existed before. Its not that it was a bad story, i liked the movie, it was very good. BUT... they destroyed the previous stories. There are a TON of things from the first time line which were amazing stories in and of themselves, that can never exist now. THATS what pissed me off about the movie. :) Meh... Kirk got his butt kicked all over the place...:D
from boyecho :
not too far off... the plan is oregon. next year.
from l-alle :
cos-play:: love it! [and the pictures are lovely!] :]
from singledadguy :
Sat Morning Matinee, 10:45 am. It was a fantastic movie, and I am pissed as hell. I'll wait until you see it to talk about it.
from singledadguy :
Give up running girly. Get a bike instead. Much better, much faster way to lose weight, whole lot less impact on your skeletal structure. :) Trust me, the bike will melt off whatever you want it to.
from boyecho :
everyone in their mid twenties to thirties should have a soft-spot for the goonies.
from i-am-jack :
There can be an inspiring, upside to those kind of moments, but that was the last thing I was feeling at the time. You realize you are alive, but in knowing that you also know you are going to die. Sometimes that can be over powering, especially in the middle of the night. I am not much for travel. I am extremely reclusive. It can be hard to get me out of the house, to go do something. Especially if other people are involved. If I had the money, a solitary vacation might do me some good. I know I have a lot to think about. What I really need to do is examine my life. Being such a solitary introspective person, you'd think that would be easy.
from justnick :
I hate it when I don't get the message that I have new notes. The problem is, I'm done with that class for the semester. I think I might have to pull the 'randomly' bump into a friend scam.
from i-am-jack :
That's funny, I was just talking about total immersion internet yesterday. I actually have dreams about that a lot.
from i-am-jack :
Actually I think it might have been " the information super highway". I still see the funny Bill and Ted time travel animation Channel One used when it began stories about it.
from i-am-jack :
Hmmm well, let's see. I graduated in 96. The internet was then known as "the super information highway". AOL charged by the hour and was pretty much the main way anyone got on. Everything did not have its own website, and web designers made a lot of money designing professional looking sites that most people can make on their own now. I remember the beginning, though it took me years to actually participate. It's kind of amazing how the internet really is a world wide web connecting everyone and everything now.
from rixbear :
P.S. Stupid non-working break symbols!
from rixbear :
"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt."<br>-Charles Schulz<br>This made me think of you.
from bobbiedylan :
um... that rabbit does look like rod stewart. hilarious.
from i-am-jack :
Continued... Yeah I know, I talk a lot. ;^}' Anyway, I was never that social a person to begin with. The internet has actually made me more social, even if that means having more friends on here than in real life. That was one of the things that made my isolation period so amazing, connecting like I never was able to in real life. So yeah, I may not live on here like before, because the same thing happened to me, people disappeared. But I still have more connections here and prefer my interaction this way, much to the dismay of my therapist. She is right about that, I DO substitute this for what is considered "social interaction". But this is better than me having almost no connections at all, and spending most of my time writing in private. Having connections on the internet does not hinder me. I would be just as much of a shut in, without it.
from i-am-jack :
You know, I think someone asked me that before, but no that isn't me. He probably has been asked if he is me too. Years ago I used to go to Diaryland chat. Well someone there thought maybe me and this girl named i-am-jill were the same person, because we never were in chat at the same time. It was funny, one day she finally came in. He/she (I forget) almost died and finally believed me. Chat used to be a lot of fun. But I can never get it to work anymore. Fight Club was the first movie I had seen Norton in. When I was searching about both him and the movie online, I came across information on Death To Smoochy. It was too early to even advertise, it was more talk of something in the works. For years I knew little about pop culture. It was kind of embarassing when I was not even aware of current events. I never watched the news. I watched almost no TV. I was not even online. The internet was pretty new (to the public) when I was in high school. Thankfully I am a little more in touch now, thanks to the internet, the little TV that creeps into my life, and Entertainment Weekly. ;^}"
from i-am-jack :
It was pretty funny. I kind of had a "wait...What?" moment. Death to Smoochy is a great movie. I remember reading about it online months before it came out. I knew I had to see that one. The usually serious Norton playing such a silly role. I saw it 3 times in the theater. It's kind of funny now that "gluten free" has become such a catch phrase. I see it on things that have nothing to do with wheat, such as shampoo. Several people have agreed with me about internet friends. I am glad you're one more. I completely agree about reality making horrible TV. We could get all "matrixy" on the subject of what is real. But yeah, at the most basic level, it is all firing synapses and perception.
from i-am-jack :
Your comment about me on your profile made me laugh. She isn't right about everything, but she actually has helped me a lot, even if it is by challenging me and making me think. I think she is contrary on purpose sometimes. Since I come here to vent, you don't hear much of the good. She really is not as bad as she sounds.
from justnick :
Glad to be of service, lol. Oh, and regarding Lennon: You asked for it, you got it. How's that for service?
from teranika :
Thanks for your comment! I don't think that proving or disproving the existence of God is necessarily the issue. This guy's feelings about God represent his personal faith, and are really none of my business. But his knowledge of accepted scientific theories are DEFINITELY relevant to how well he can represent an entire country's science policy!
from justnick :
I really hope you're right. If I do manage it, you're officially invited to my tropical-cabin-warming party.
from smashthegas :
Yeah I read it LOL, soz I meant to comment earlier, how remiss of me :-O! And yeah, I speak british, English AND Scouse, so THERE! Hehe. Ya wouldn't understand me, I don't think, a lot of Americans don't.... *grinz*
from l-alle :
two things:: 1. you are rill pretty 2. GIRL SCOUT COOKIES! [crying/flailing] i want them nooooooooooooooooooooooow! [foot stamp]
from l-alle :
I AM LAUGHING SO HARD I CAN BARELY BREATHE MUCH LESS TYPE THIS I DONT KNOW WHY [YES I DO, IM A JERK] BABIES FALLING IS MY FAVORITE THING OF ALL TIME I GIVE YOU THIS IN RETURN:: http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3122/3192205382_56e4610357_b.jpg HAHAHAHAHAH THANK YOU!
from bobbiedylan :
ohmygaw...i. hate. ugg boots. and i swear... anyone in them is annoying. and stupid. congrats on your sales averages!
from l-alle :
re:: style [aw shux]
from bobbiedylan :
yep 3rd grade... your reaction was the exact same as my own and anyone else that ive told this story to. how is that even accomplished? where are this kid's parents?
from legolass :
hehe sorry :-) legolass - cheesecake! xx
from bobbiedylan :
not too much, ive just been busy! i plan on updating asap!
from justnick :
Yeah, you're completely right. But it was 2am and I was full of beer and narcissism. I get maudlin in the middle of the night. You know how it is.
from urbancadence :
Man, you're very, VERY good! :D
from urbancadence :
Decrease in rent??? I'm so jealous!!!!!!
from bobbiedylan :
happy belated birthday to you both!
from boyecho :
thank you. these are new thoughts. new feelings. out of left field.
from l-alle :
my car bit the big one a few months ago and so i donated it and have been bus-ing it. instead of thinking 'its so cold today!' or whatever- i try to focus on how good the walking [to/from bus stops] are good for my body, and good for the environment and for a busy single moms morning commute [one less car on the road!] and about how much money im saving in the long run [car insurance/gas/maintenance/etc]. when im on the bus, or walking, i always project 'alone on purpose/dont talk to me'. it helps, i promise. and definitely, definitely, definitely headphones on the bus. headphones turned up so loud that you honestly cannot hear people talking to you/what theyre saying, and stare straight ahead or out the window with 'ive done this a million times before and i am Made Of Armor'. just think of yr daily transit times as an opportunity to try out different characters. [i always think of what cindy sherman used to say, about taking on different personas when she would be walking through different neighborhoods/environments] it has actually helped turn this bus thing into a really strangely empowering experience. xoxo
from bobbiedylan :
sorry to read about the car situation. i just had to drop a couple hundred on mine also... it was another source of stress for me as well! not as serious as a transmission tho. i hope you carry pepper spray or something with you on the bus. i hate taking the bus out here too. quite a few scary weirdos...be safe!
from l-alle :
of course! i have email at:: [email protected] :]
from bobbiedylan :
thanks! i totally know it takes time but i need to hear it from other people sometimes... ha. :-)
from smashthegas :
Doesn't it have any decent car chases in it?
from bobbiedylan :
oh my... we have the same stuff going on here... its been constant and completely annoying. although im sure im more used to it than you. but still. i hate snow.
from l-alle :
a speech tournament, actually. [takes retainer out, shines it, puts it back in mouth]
from arianrhad :
Aww, you two are adorable.
from bobbiedylan :
i like the black and white family picture... but i think i would have gone with the color photos for the individual shots of the kids to show off how pretty their eyes are...very cute!
from arianrhad :
No, I'll be down for thanksgiving but not christmas. We're having christmas in Eureka this year. It will be our first tree! I'm so excited. We've been drooling over decorations. Lots of fun. Oh, Cory wants to make sure you know he has a beard (for the drawing). He would also like to tell you it is a red beard. Of course, that is a filthy lie. his beard is blond. Silly boy.
from arianrhad :
blond (thinning) hair and blue eyes (with a bit of green, like mine) - yay! funny art!
from boyecho :
agreed. i just don't like to waste spoken words..
from bobbiedylan :
thanks... i would for sure be interested in the title of that book if you wouldnt mind looking into for me!
from l-alle :
maybe my whole BRAIN is a worry center...no wonder im so bad at math.
from l-alle :
yeh, when i first started having those dreams when i was younger i looked it up. im currently the mayor of stresstowne. stop by anytime.
from arianrhad :
The masks are adorable! Also: LOOK AT ME!
from l-alle :
happy halloween! [the masks are super cute!]
from l-alle :
its yo la tengo's 'tiny birds' from their album 'summer sun'. <-- whole album is Amazing, and i highlyhighly recommend it. and if you can find that video- id like to see it!
from l-alle :
oh no. i have _zero_ artistic ability. that is a drawing by egon schiele. :]
from l-alle :
i dont know what to say, so [hugs]. i hope that things get better. soon. xoxo
from smashthegas :
Hnnn... still political...
from l-alle :
the short story is so, so good. its funny, and sad and true and honest...[lavar burton] but you dont have to take MY word for it! [/lavar burton]
from l-alle :
[and boy singers? _le swoon_. lucky you.]
from l-alle :
i actually did grow up here in shakesville. [i think maybe i made friends w/ too many people from elsewhere, too early on. ...and books and movies and music probably didnt help much either. now im embarrassingly unaware of vernacular bleed-ins!]
from l-alle :
i will admit that i always thought that the 'h' stood for 'holy'. [although i have also speculated that it might also stand for 'hairy' or 'hippie'.]
from urbancadence :
You go to Fremont to take pictures, and you don't take one of the troll under the bridge???
from antipodean :
I should add two things to my previous comment (and sorry about the length!): 1. I think a lot of the current identification with the U.S. in Australia comes from the effects of current U.S. cultural/economic imperialism, AS WELL AS Australia's own national history (and whom it has traditionally identified with since European 'settlement' i.e. the product of a previous imperial power). 2. I don't intend to be entirely nihilisitc about Australia - I do think there are many things which are great about this country, but I do feel that (like all countries) it has a lot to resolve and reform. And that rests with the people to establish, I think. But it first requires an acknowledgement and an awareness that I don't think you can get from the prevailing way we live our lives today in our consumer societies. We can't turn the mirror on ourselves when we're blinded.
from antipodean :
Very well put :) It is not surprising that any of this has happened, unfortunately. It is all intricately linked to the underbelly of Australia�s political and social history, and the way that the popular imagination continues to construct national identity over here. Happily, I should announce, since writing my thesis there has been a change of government (aka the Rudd Labor government). This wasn�t covered in the media, but I have just found out that as at 9th August this year, all TPV holders have become eligible for permanent visas, and the TPV system has been phased out. Thank god. I can say outright that the temporary protection visa system was continuous with Australia�s so-called �policy of deterrence�, in that it was a punitive, systematic attempt by the government (with bi-partisan support for a long time) at making social, economic and political membership of the nation extremely prohibitive for asylum seekers who had not jumped through the correct bureaucratic �hoops�. It was racist, draconic, inhumane and a complete contravention of the international laws to which Australia supposedly subscribes. The Federal Govt. hadn�t even veiled its intentions around the temporary protection visa. I quote this from the Parliamentary Library social policy section on the web: �TPVs, mandatory detention and offshore processing are part of a border protection strategy aimed at impressing on people that if they come to Australia in an unauthorised manner they will not get the same benefits available to those who arrive in an authorised manner. This strategy would appear to be working: there have been very few boat arrivals since September 2001.� This article also acknowledged the second class citizen effect of the TPV system, citing a report from the Victorian state govt: �The TPV policy has created uncertainty, insecurity, isolation, confusion, powerlessness and health problems among the holders of these visas as well as an increased burden on community organisations, state governments and volunteers.� It is likely that the phasing out of the system came from the same kind of realizations as this. And you�re right, the Howard government should be hung out to dry on this one. Then again, the fact that such policies had long-standing support from the opposition doesn�t speak much in anyone�s favour. It�s interesting that you should note the use of �9/11� in Australian politics. I agree, the terrorist attack in the U.S. was a U.S. issue in many ways, but its repercussions have been felt around the world, particularly as western governments (and governments supported and funded by the U.S.) have seized upon the political climate built up by 9/11 to enforce their own agendas and power plays. The use of the �war on terror� mantra and the strong, immediate identification with America by the previous Howard government in Australia (and by a significant majority of the public) is not surprising. Firstly, Australia has a long history, since European invasion, of identifying strongly with western Empires (this means Britain, and then the U.S. following World War II). By the British, it was built up as a convict colony of course (the land was originally termed �terra nullius� at the time of European �settlement�, i.e. �uninhabited�, despite the fact that the entire country was already been settled by hundreds of existing, thriving Indigenous nations). Its �settler� identity up until the end of World War I was strongly British (i.e. very subservient to British national identity). All trade ties and the predominant migration bias was bound up in Britain. The European �thinkers� of the time idealized Australia as a bastion of whiteness (I�m not kidding � the overt �White Australia Policy �existed until the 1950s, which was established (amongst other things) to prevent migration of (and I quote) �the yellow hordes� of China), and both Australia�s Indigenous peoples, and �non-white� migrants were derided, excluded, marginalized and the targets of overt racism and political segregation. Since World War II and the postwar period, Australia has emphasized multiculturalism in theory, but in terms of national identity, there persists a strong undercurrent of xenophobia. Culturally, the public imagination is much more likely to identify with the U.S. and U.K. The study I mentioned before, conducted recently at the University of Western Sydney , found for example that a majority of Australians would strongly prefer American (U.S.) cultural influence over Chinese influence. This is despite the fact that Australia rests firmly within the Asia Pacific region, relies these days much more on the Asian economic market than on any ties with Britain, and has a strong emphasis on multicultural ideals. Quite frankly, the Australian public and political imagination identified with the U.S. experience of 9/11 so easily because it tied in with the existing national identity, and it happened to coincide with the 2001 election campaigns in October of that year. Howard won at the time because the Party seized upon the climate of fear created by strong public identification with the U.S. �war on terror�, and shaped it to fit another issue of public �fear� at the time, surrounding a so-called �flood� of �boat people�, many of whom (ironically � but this was lost on the public) were actually fleeing the very regimes (Taliban in Afghanistan; Saddam government in Iraq; the Kashmir crises) that the U.S. and its �allies� were supposedly getting into such a fervor about dismantling. It is all quite insane. But hardly surprising, because it comes back to power. Globalised systems of power.
from boyecho :
it's mainly the job. going in early, coming home late only to be back again 6 hours later.
from antipodean :
Thank you :D I do feel loved! Hehe. Yes, I have heard a lot about the benefits of exercise, especially for depression. My physical fitness is something I've neglected for way too long. I haven't put on any weight (if anything, I've lost some since not being on that nasty old prescription stuff), but I certainly wouldn't have much fitness. It could well be an issue of physical energy, which is either compounding things or preventing my mindset and attitude from picking up. I do wonder whether I'm not still somewhat 'deflated' after all this time (not 'depressed', in the sense that I was before, emotionally). More like the malaise that comes with a head cold. You're right. Perhaps getting 'on the move', living healthier (and just generally being kinder to myself) would get things flowing. Work on the body, and see if the mind follows. Process of elimination, hey. :D
from randomrabbit :
They are not doilies, they're lace throws. Manly ones that go very nicely with my cushion covers. Ignoring that slur, I'm here to *cough* apologise. I shouldn't have called you the R word. I don't know, I thought you were being ironic or something. But I know now. Please don't boycott English goods. If not for me then for all the poor scone and crumpet makers, eking out a living in the face of cheap Chinese imports of baked goods. Think of the children woman.
from jumblygiant :
good god, i love you. i'd vote for you too. for anything.
from singledadguy :
What made me upset was that I dont have money to send my boy to school. If at some point in his future he decides that he wants to pursue a life in the adult film industry, that's his decision to make. Not being able to provide an adequate future for him... that's mine.
from randomrabbit :
An interest rate of 32.48% to be precise! Yes it appears I am that sad to work it out. I think I may go and change my comment for you in my profile where I subtly implied you were a Republican, just in case you're, albeit unlikely, ever in my neck of the woods and decide to come belt me about the head for saying it.
from singledadguy :
18 & 16.
from urbancadence :
I would SO vote for you!!!!!! ;-)
from urbancadence :
I love you. I REALLY wish that every single American thought like you did. And they wouldn't vote for McCain/Palin (Or rather, Palin/McCain as it's more like these days) just because they also have a vagina.
from boyecho :
sometimes... other times it can be pretty dangerous..
from urbancadence :
Mere words cannot express how disgusted I am at the #$%^#& republicans. I agree with you 101%. The separation of church and state is completely meaningless in the minds of these self-righteous retards. Them using "god" as reasons to pass policies and stuff is basically no different from Islamic extremists from using "allah" and jihad as reasons to do their thing. If mccain wins the election... well, this country will discover even greater depths of shithole-ness. And if the people of this country vote republican again after the nightmare that was bush... I'm really sorry to say this, but they probably deserve whatever shit they get from their choice. It just sucks that their decision will also decide the fate of the rest of us who didn't vote for mccain.
from singledadguy :
I think I just added gasoline to the whole fan thing. Not to mention the gunpowder and c4 i threw in for good measure. :D
from urbancadence :
Thanks for that picture. Now I can eat lunch all over again after having lost it all! :-P
from boyecho :
i can't explain why it's bad for me to 'win'. except that it shouldn't be a battle in the first place. [but, even as i say that, i'm not so sure i believe it..] all i can say is thank you for your words.
from singledadguy :
I didnt, but I did DVR it, so I can watch it tonight. My sons were watching something last night, and we only have the one TV. I couldnt kick em off... BUT the main thing is - I dont have an issue with the things that Dems say. I have an issue with the Republicans. Defeating them before the elections is MOST inmportant. Getting people to think about whats really at stake, getting them think about the chance their son or daughter might die there, the cost of whats going on there. And that there is a man who wants to continue the same thing. I dont care that he picked a woman as his running mate, all that says to me is "vote getting stunt". I care that he is more two-faced than President Bush ever was. And that if elected this country will get worse not better.
from urbancadence :
Why, were you super drunk? ;-) If you aren't - THANKS!!!! :-P It's hard holding up a flag for her! :-P
from bobbiedylan :
congrats on being even sexier!
from smashthegas :
Oh dear. I laughed when I read your last entry but the thought of writing about how shit America and all it's inhabitants are... well fook, I'd need a month of work just to plan it, let alone write it, hahaha. *stands his ground and growlz evilly* Hahahaha. Americans. Bless 'em!
from randomrabbit :
Had my computer at home not been, to use the technical term, proper fucked, I�d have read your previous entry in plenty of time to have taken offence at your vicious besmirching of the European character and, well, by association, me, and reacted as any proud, red-blooded Englishman would when the name of our great nation is sullied in such a way, that is drafted you a very stern letter indeed young lady. We may not have a backbone but we have� other stuff. Stuff your teeny tiny American brains can�t even comprehend. And ha, you wouldn�t be able to invade anyway because no one there actually knows where Europe is. You may have a backbone but it�s a backbone connected to a big, hairy, dimpled arse called America.
from boyecho :
i'm bad about not including the who and what when i link a song. this particular song is boy with 100 hands by Crooked Fingers.. one of my long time favorite bands. it's a demo of the final version that ended up on the album Red Devil Dawn. i'm very glad you both enjoyed it.
from boyecho :
when i try, they sound terrible. so i've always thought that if i should ever find myself writing them, i'd just go back through my 7 or 8 years of entries and use a handful.
from singledadguy :
She knows who she is. It was a wave, though, more than a serenade. :)
from antipodean :
Everything's chill :) I just think it's time I made the diary less publicly available (I sometimes worry about people in my future career circles finding this thing which dates back to my adolescence! It'd be pretty embarrassing, not to mention just a privacy issue). I'm totally cool with my diary buds and close friends knowing - just want to encircle it with trust :) Diaryland should have sent you an email with the u/name & password, but if you haven't received, let me know where to send. All the best, PJ.
from singledadguy :
So.... Mine was nto exactly accurate. I mean it was close, I do learn from the visual more than spoken, however, I have a large creative side that *is* stymied some of the time as the profile suggests. I doubt however this test takes in to account whether or not you have a psychological condition. As I have add, this did not measure it what so ever. The thing that was missing is "none of the above" category, which woudl allow someone to elaborate on why they thought something was one thing, or tell the tester what they thought it REALLY reminded them of. :)
from bobbiedylan :
we are like brain-opposites!
from urbancadence :
Yeah, he's sooo off the mark like you can't imagine! It was kinda surprising for me actually, 'cos I've always known about his ego problem in the past, but it's never been this bad. Oh well, I guess he's just gonna have to be disappointed this weekend and learn from it. Whether or not we remain friends afterwards will be completely up to him!
from singledadguy :
How about a self portrait?
from antipodean :
The thing that irks me so much after all this is that I learnt my lesson about drinking a couple of years ago. It didn't take much. Alcohol ended up getting me into some pretty bad, depressing mindsets at a time when I was also on a bit of a depressive whirl. I swore off it and have limited my intake ever since, because I remembered what I was like and how close I came to doing harm to myself. And the ironic thing is, my mum divorced dad a long time ago for his drinking problems. You'd think I would have run the other way at the first sign of trouble with drinking from L. But no, my experience with dad has driven me the other way: to believe that any sign of 'problems' I might see with L. is just me channeling dad issues. So I don't trust my own judgements as well as I should. But let's be honest: For L., nothing seems to change his mind very much. No break-up. No rock bottom (there have been a couple). His easy-going, funny-man style places him in this little bubble; this 'it's never that bad' mind-set. A fatal optimist. It's not good when the things you come to know so well about your boyfriend are those negative, repetitive patterns, while a lot of the good things get overshadowed in your memory. Until you're not with him for a while, then of course you forget all the bad stuff. Fool yourself into thinking just like him: that nothing was ever that bad. But then again, there's always this thought: am I just channeling issues from the past? The answer of course is no, although paternal drinking issues make all of this so much harder for me to deal with, personally.
from antipodean :
I really feel like a fool.
from antipodean :
Thank you. It's true that the drinking thing going on between L. and his best mate complicates everything. I can't count the number of times I've tried to broach the issue with L. of limiting drinks, and always I'm met with the defensive response that I'm trying to 'tell him what to do' and 'cut him off from his friends' or 'limit his social life', or (my favourite) 'destroy an institution'. There was a while (until recently) when he more or less agreed that I just couldn't be around him when he was drunk and that he needed to be more moderate. But lately, it seems he's just been edging his way back to getting drunker and drunker whenever he's out. What he doesn't understand is that I'm not asking him to give up his friends or his social life (I would never even dream of asking that of anyone; it would be unconscionable to me - it's completely not the point!) - I'm asking him to have the good sense to watch how much he drinks while socialising and to keep me out of the firing line of idiotic states of drunkenness, because I'm done with being scared, angry and even (at times) hateful of how he gets when he's off his face. It's like having a crazy person in the house. But you're right - it's the old adage that you can lead a horse to water...And I'm beginning to doubt this is going to ever get anywhere. Not even our break-up six months ago has really made anything truly apparent to him, because otherwise we wouldn't be having this same old situation happening all over again. I don't know. I'm seriously considering just leaving for good. As a friend said to me (L's best mate's girlfriend), I have to decide whether I think L is smart enough to get over it sooner rather than later, and whether or not I can deal with it til he does. Frankly, I don't see anything changing anytime soon. All I see at the moment is a return to the good old mayhem everytime he stays out with his mates. Time to have a packed suitcase by the door again, so I don't have to be there when the shit hits the proverbial fan. I honestly don't know what to do. He's just shutting me out and laughing things off all over again. I'm really tired of this. I suppose I should have listened to my friends when they said six months ago that I should leave this relationship. I don't know how to change things in any kind of healthy direction.
from antipodean :
Thank you for sharing something so personal with me. I am honoured, and I completely understand where you're coming from - I'm still in that quandary with L. There have been a lot of issues around alcohol (I wish the plastic on the grill was our only issue!). The situation is pretty much the same - when socially drinking, he never knows when to stop, and his best friend is just as bad. Both myself and the girlfriend of L's best friend have struggled with this issue for a while now. Sometimes there's progress, but now it's beginning to seem like a honeymoon period. Problem is, they're both so defensive of their 'right' to get drunk and be 'guys'. Their memory of events (especially L's memory) is completely absent - so without evidence of anything going awry, it's so easy for them to downplay the consequences of their inebriation. More than this, they can celebrate it. And if myself or L's girlfriend ever on the very odd occassion get drunk, the two of them quickly take the moral high ground. I swear they use it as justification to step up their binges. I'm so tired of it. L and I already broke up once over this, when things got scary. He still can't remember the event though, so I worry now that it makes any promises he makes a little hollow. Honestly, I am wondering why I'm still with him. I guess I really thought he'd learnt something from our break-up. But it seems he still doesn't completely 'own' his mistakes. I think I need to do something like you have - support him by limiting intake myself at all times. Otherwise, if nothing changes, I really have no choice but to leave. You know, I've never written about this here before, for that exact reason: I haven't wanted to embarrass. But then again, I've been curbing so many of my feelings when it comes to this issue. And I'm sick of it.
from urbancadence :
He's a good guy! Diamond and Denim? What are they, American Gladiators??
from smashthegas :
I wanna special gas mashin tyre roastin rockerdude piccy :-D Smashxxx PS I buy it off ya if ya want.
from danimal42 :
password please and thank you..
from danimal42 :
password please and thank you..
from movieboy :
Of course I have :) I love it, but don�t go in with the Oscar-worthy expectations all the nerds were promoting shortly before its release. And I miss our emails too!
from raven72d :
here we go: p/w working!
from raven72d :
aha! i will need a password if i'm to share the random list...
from raven72d :
thanks! i'll be looking forward to the list!
from boyecho :
and perhaps i shouldn't be depending so much on others... welcome back!
from bobbiedylan :
haha thanks! its seriously become an obsession, only due to having way too much time on my hands!
from singledadguy :
Yah... the song is annoying, but the poem, the speech it came from, is waay better. Not all of Jim Morrison's music was stunningly powerful, but all of his words were amazing.
from singledadguy :
ummm EMAIL :D :P Anyway. I do happen to agree that with a lot of that, and no I am *not* in the porn industry. I work for a large software security firm who likely makes your anti-virus software.
from marioaguirre :
Hello Sunstargirl! I'm a blues musician from Argentina, and a member of diaryland.com If the Blues is into your preferences -as I guesss-, I inveite you to visit www.b6maguirre.com . There you'll have a slight idea of my music. Thanls for receiving this! Best regards Mario Aguirre [email protected]
from urbancadence :
HA HA!!!! That poor kid, he never had a chance, and this is before he's even out of the womb! Although, if I had the chance to do the naming, I wouldn't be totally against having some fun with it ;)
from bobbiedylan :
ugh... definitely not fun at first. i might be getting used to it though! ;-)
from movieboy :
I've been meaning to see it, but I haven't yet. I'll let you know what I think. Thanks!
from singledadguy :
I think the appropriate comment would be "Oh My..." or "Wow....", however I would like to suggest techinical difficulites are currently preventing broadcast at this time, please stand by... :D. or... for the rest of us men.. MY EYES!!! OH MY GOD MY EYES!!!
from bobbiedylan :
thanks!
from movieboy :
In retrospect, maybe I should have distanced it from your 'Children of Men'-like expectations.
from raven72d :
True enough about urban finances--- splitting them is always better. But my point was the risk one runs in undergraduate or grad school days--- living with a lover could mean losing family financial support. And you'd have to Explain what you were doing. I'd rather gnaw my own leg off than be forced to Explain something I've done to anybody.
from urbancadence :
Wow, looks like a blast!! The parade definitely looks more fun that the pride parades in LA. I didn't go this year 'cos I had a friggin' final the following day... hence ruining my entire weekend of pride festivities (I stayed in studying for 99% of it) :( But WOOO!!!! Glad you had fun, and I'm glad you're sooooo cool! The world would be SO awesome if your attitudes towards LGBT peoples was infectious :)
from raven72d :
Cheese makes me deathly ill. So does tomato. So--- no red sauces, no cheese on anything.
from raven72d :
I suspect you don't know any... But back in my archives there are explanations of my personal mythology.... And you're invited to read anyway...
from raven72d :
Hmmm... There's lots o' info in the depths of my archives... But let's just say that I always wanted to grow up and be a Cuteness Tester for Sanrio.
from raven72d :
I always assign Amalekite-hood to the evil, alien Esquimaux, the batrachian Manxmen, and the vile, unhuman Andaman Islanders--- all groups opposed to Sanrio-ness...and who want to devour humanity.
from raven72d :
As well they should... After all: on the Day of the Muffled Oar, Hello Kitty's twin sister Mimmy, destroyer of Worlds, will come to smite the Amalekites and inaugurate the reign of Japanese Corporate Cuteness. So says Tuxedo Sam, the Messenger of Hello Kitty...and spiffiest of psychopomps.
from smashthegas :
The last babe who called me cute got a broken nose. (She was drunk and fell down the stairs outside a club in town, while I gallantly called an ambulance on my mobile phone.) Smashxxx
from singledadguy :
oh! oh! Mememememememe pick me! (soo i only just noticed you were closed, i too have been closed somewhat for a while though too). [email protected]
from raven72d :
I'm a great believer in Japanese Corporate Cuteness...
from raven72d :
Aha...a diary that seems intriguing. May I read?
from boyecho :
d&d was cool. but this new edition is crap. i mean, where are the druids?
from jumblygiant :
I always think you look amazing. and as dumb as it sounds, it's because you have such a beautiful soul. and i mean that. at any rate, hope you're having a better day doll.
from jumblygiant :
good lord, you are beautiful. all of the pictures are great. but, personally, I vote for 4. with 3 as a backup. xo.
from bobbiedylan :
i say you send 3 and 6.
from randomrabbit :
3 also!
from smashthegas :
Definitely number 3. Definitely. Absolutely. Positively. Smashxxx PS Fancy a fuck? *grinz cheekily*
from urbancadence :
Number 3!
from urbancadence :
well, i meant the styling as well :) That couldn't have come from your mother!
from urbancadence :
Your hair looks so purty :)
from smashthegas :
A sexy wink? It looks like you lost an eye in a bar room brawl and are very tired. *grinz and runz away* hahahah. Smashxxx PS Thanks for the entry!
from bobbiedylan :
hahaha sorry about your nose! that is pretty funny tho... you still look cute in your pictures whether you are missing flesh or not!
from saru-san :
Hello! Thanks for the add! I came by to say hello - oh, did that already - and check out your diary, but you're sequestered! While I can't honestly claim to be an adoring fan - yet - I'd sure like the opportunity to become one! My email is [email protected] and I hope you'll send me the VIP info... but if you really don't want to send a backstage pass to a complete stranger, I understand completely!
from rixbear :
lol I agree with Urbancadence: take Biore for every penny they've got! See you soon! Love, Bear
from urbancadence :
Awww, that sucks!!!! I'm so sorry :( But I smell lawsuit here. Take pictures and take it up with a lawyer! But anyway, bath tissue disintegrates too easily when wet. Try using cotton balls instead. Neosporin works wonders for surface wounds like this. Take care! :(
from jumblygiant :
thanks for the note love. xo.
from urbancadence :
Yeah, I *loved* Aiden (both the character and the name)! You have to catch up on the DVD's. It's a really witty and well-written series. And then top it off with the movie! As for Irish names, I really like Connor for some reason. I also like Cameron, Ronan, Gavin, and Keith. If I ever start an Irish boy band, those will be the members' names. Ha!
from smashthegas :
Hehe I've added you so yer able to write a guest entry for me! Woo hoo! Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
Moi? A terrible influence? I don't know wha tyou mean *grinz evilly*
from smashthegas :
It's comin I promise! Just let me get my holiday out the way! Would you like to go on top, Sunny? *sniggerz cheekily* Smashxxx
from boyecho :
to be honest, i'm not sure why.. but the band is 'low'. the song is 'murderer'... and this particular version is very strong....hits me just right..
from smashthegas :
:P How come all you yanks are always over here exclaiming "Oh I LOVE your little country! It's so goddamn quaint!" and then paying ��2.2 million for a little hovel in London that a British person wouldn't pay 10p for? HAHAHAHA!!!!! (I love winding you up dear, you have "anger issues" as you Americans say) HAHAHAHA!!! *runs away* Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
There's no way a black person will ever be US president. It goes against everything America (really) stands for. Not that I mean that offensively, cos you are amongst about 5 of my American friends that I love so dearly. But your country sucks, heh. Smashxxx
from urbancadence :
Word. I wish everybody thought the way you do. I really don't see how two guys or two girls shackin' up will tear the very fabric of reality, as the religious conservatives make it appear. We're all tax-paying, law-abiding citizens. So why can't we live like everyone else? I mean... if you're against gay marriage, nobody's forcing you to get one. Live and let live. Everyone deserves to be happy and to love whomever they want to, as long as they're not hurting anyone. I really don't see why those damn conservatives have nothing better to do with their time than to oppose something that, if left unopposed, wouldn't affect them one single bit. Nobody's forcing them to witness two guys or two girls having sex, are they? GET A LIFE!!!! :-) But in the meantime... it's truly a monumental day for not just California, but for the US of A! Let's hope things will only move forward from here on! HURRAH FOR THE CALIFORNIA SUPREME COURT JUSTICES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
from smashthegas :
You shoulda come out with me and a coupla my rocker buddies and got absolutely wasted. They're a good bunch of dudes, just very hairy. Heh. Smashxxx
from urbancadence :
Loca.
from smashthegas :
I would paint my house black. I'm a rockerdude. You gotta problem with that? *growlz ferociously evil growlz*
from bobbiedylan :
oh my god the pictures alone are hard for me to look at. makes me shiver. i could never do anything like that or skydive. im a wuss!
from boyecho :
the problem is, i think this band is bad. it's not something i'd ever listen to, i just play in it because it's the only band i've managed to join on guitar. i'm too afraid to show other people, because the vocals are horrible. the recordings are horrible. i'm embarassed by it. not the most healthy approach, for sure, but that's how it is.
from bobbiedylan :
its been awhile since ive read some diaries, but i caught up with yours today... it was definitely a good time!
from urbancadence :
Happy anniversary! :-)
from smashthegas :
I fooken hate all these twats that bleat on about being green. it happens a lot in work cos it's the government. Always babbling on about carbon footprint and turn this and that off. I do my bit by leaving my computer on all night and using the photocopier alot, haha. (No really, as much as it annoys me, I'm not that sad, the truth is I just always forget to turn my computer off cos I'm a big dumb dude, hehe.)
from smashthegas :
Ooh Sunny you're so naughty! Haha. Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
Ah, the agony of indecision... *grinz*
from smashthegas :
Hell to fuck I gotta try that shit. Do you uh... feel like comin over here and lettin me smell you? *grinz* Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
I've done the peeing down my pants/swatting at invisible flies thing. It's called drinking too much JD and coke in the daytime and forgetting to go the loo before leaving the pub. Gah! hehe. Smashxxx
from urbancadence :
Most of these homeless people are schizophrenic, and unfortunately, they have no means of getting treatment. They're sick, so they can't work. They have no jobs. Therefore, they have no access to healthcare. It's really sad. There are groups who go around rounding them up and giving them treatment, but one of the most debilitating symptoms of schizophrenia is delusions of persecution - they think that everyone is out to ruin them, and will refuse to go for treatment out of irrational fear. Thus it's a downward spiral that doesn't seem to have an end. Very very sad.
from boyecho :
this is a multi-faceted messsage. thanks for the goodwishes for paco-cat. he'll be back to normal in no time, i hope. also, it's not just love that is sabotaged, it's everything..really.. but i'm surprised that i was that obvious... and... haruki murakami... i've read at least 5 of his novels. he's not listed as one of my favorite authors, though wind-up bird is one of my favorite books i've ever read... i think it depends mostly on who is translating him.
from smashthegas :
You've never shagged on the bonnet of a ride? you haven't LIVED! Hehe. Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
Hehe you are funny, Sunny! *mwah*
from jumblygiant :
I am smiling. You are wonderful.
from urbancadence :
Doesn't it suck that the bad things keep happening to the good people, while the bad people keep getting the better things? It just isn't right, but that's the way life goes. And I completely agree with you about the ignorant people. As if HIV positive people don't have enough problems of their own. Sigh. I'm still crushed by the news, but I have to act as if nothing has changed. Nothing's changed actually, I'm still as much as a friend as I was (perhaps even more so). I just need a couple of weeks to get over the shocking news, I guess. I don't know if I'd be as strong as him if we were in each other's shoes. I have so much more respect and admiration for him now. In any case, thanks so much for your kind thoughts! You're an angel! ;-) And thanks for those cheery/funny pictures! I like the first one!
from urbancadence :
Thanks!!! I hope so to. I'd be walking on air right now if I weren't trying to stay grounded and guarded. But we'll just have to wait and see, I guess! :-) Thanks for the birthday wishes too!!!!
from smashthegas :
Ill be keeping you and Opa in my thoughts. *big hugzzz* Smashxxx
from bobbiedylan :
im sorry for your opa... i hate hospitals and im sure he loved your care package! be strong!
from urbancadence :
Aw I'm so sorry :( I think you should just get fly over there. It'll make everyone feel better, especially your dad. Hang in there :(
from urbancadence :
Aw, thanks!! I hope so too!!! I want *my* "bear", dammit! Haha! We'll see if we hang out tomorrow. He said he'd call me, and so far he's called me when he said he actually would, so hopefully he'd stay true to his character. And yes, I'm a giddy smitten mess, but I refuse to admit it, at least not to him! Hahaha!
from urbancadence :
You're a violent little girl, aren't you? Haha!!
from boyecho :
hahahah. nice april fools. i can definately appreciate the [vile, wicked, evil] humor in that. if someone did that to me, i'd lose it. any of my guitars. brilliant.
from urbancadence :
Thanks! I'm cautiously optimistic :) BTW, my password doesn't work anymore. What gives? Why'd you kick me out? Boooo :'-(
from bobbiedylan :
yea it sucks but i know that things will eventually straighten out. he has already refinanced his house once so i dont know much about the process, but he doesnt want to do it again unless we are extremely desperate. i am just going to be as positive as i possibly can, well starting now i mean. :-)
from bobbiedylan :
hahaha! i hate cooking so i know how he feels... i suck at it.
from lexikahn :
Thanks for stopping by!
from smashthegas :
Tell Bear if he wants to come to Liverpool there is a job for him here. Seriously, I walked past the pub near work only this evening on the way to the train station, and it had a sign outside which read: "High quality chef wanted, full time hours, must be able to prepare food to a very high standard." And then underneath after a long gap it read "Must be able to use microwave." ROFL Smashxxx
from jumblygiant :
you are so wonderful. i think that every time i come here.
from boyecho :
negative on the jazz. i just can't get into it.. just give me a guitar and piles of little effects boxes and i'll create ambient space noises unto eternity.
from bobbiedylan :
i know ive been busy...aaaand lazy. im on spring break so ill have to write something asap! i liked your graphic picture... and i prefer the flag background to the brown background... and i think the fact that your little sister likes math is hilariously fantastic!
from lisamcc :
Aw, thankee!
from boyecho :
boyecho at diaryland dot com should still be valid. because, now i'm intrigued.
from smashthegas :
LOL I think me and bear would get on great shit, hehe.
from urbancadence :
Hahahaha! A math party!! Your dad could pretend that he heard "Meth Party" and... oh wait, that's inappropriate. :-P I dunno, he could have the guests play math games and stuff. Have a treasure hunt where all the clues are math-related (i.e., use trigonometrical ratios to calculate distances and directions, etc.)... actually, it'll be kinda fun, albeit totally geeky! :-)
from urbancadence :
I like it so much that I "stole" it and posted it on my MySpace page :-P
from urbancadence :
Now, that frozen in Grand Central Station thing is COOL!
from antipodean :
Did I read something about musk sticks? Hmm never realised they were an antipodean specialty. Always assumed they were everywhere. But yes, they are lovely - childhood favourites :)
from urbancadence :
People are so weird. Ugh. Just ignore him, I say. The moment's passed (BOY, has it passed).
from smashthegas :
If you asked my opinion, I would say don't respond to him. He hasn't responded to you for years and clearly initiated contact so he could get back into reading your diary. This of course, is just my opinion, but I honestly don't see that there is anything to gain for either of you by re-initiating contact. Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
Hehe you are a cheeky sausage, but thank you for giving me the albeit fooken FACTUALLY INCORRECT - password, LOL Smashxxx
from antipodean :
Aww thank you :)
from smashthegas :
Ooh that book sounds interesting. I always like filthy stuff. Hehe.
from antipodean :
Thank you! It actually means a lot to hear that interest from other people, because it's so easy after a while doing your PhD to start wondering why the hell you decided to do it in the first place lol. But yeah, I am having to remind myself that it is an important and interesting story to tell. The questions you raised were very perceptive, and they're the exact kinds of issues I want to look at through people's stories. Only real challenge right now is getting past my shyness and my discomfort with entering into people's lives and workplaces as a 'researcher', or strange 'outsider' and find in-roads into the 'field' that don't make me look like some kind of intrusive journalist. It's a confidence thing really; feeling that I can play the role properly. It takes a lot of personal perserverence. But I know I'll get there. Thank you for your encouraging words :)
from movieboy :
I think you have my email address if you want to elaborate � I remember you sent me photos of your paintings some time ago. I appreciate the non-lecture! Again, I agreed with the principles of �Ishmael�, but not much else. I'm intrigued as to what I said that led you to believe it would be my thing � I forget everything as soon as I post it. And I thought I swore all the time! I'm sticking with you in the event of societal collapse. Hardly anyone would be able to survive in the wild. I can't even change a car tyre. It might do us some good, in the long run. Judging by the average news broadcast, we're about ten years overdue by now anyway. Let me know if you have trouble ordering musk sticks.
from movieboy :
I know exactly what you mean. Take care of yourself :)
from tithonus :
Do you have my email address? Do I have yours? I don't remember.
from antipodean :
Heya :) Wow, I really don't update much these days do I? Makes me sad, but it's been hard doing the journal thing the last year or so. I think I wore myself out lol! Just wanted to live the life un-worded for a while. To answer your question, I'm doing a PhD in social inquiry and the area of interest is young people's experiences of 'couch surfing' - a kind of 'secondary homelessness' where you can't find secure, safe or more permanent housing and, instead of turning immediately to crisis services or going the worst scenario of living 'on the streets', you rely as long as you can on your social and extended family networks, 'doubling up' on friends' couches and in spare bedrooms, often moving from place to place in temporary arrangements. So I'll be doing interviews with young men and women from a variety of backgrounds who have experienced this (and also inviting them to get involved in some visual works, where I'll be providing disposable cameras and sketch pads for young people to 'map out' or take photographs of places that represent their own impressions and meanings of 'home' and 'belonging'). The aim is really to 'map out' couch surfing(the why, the how, the what, the what now?) from the perspective of those who have experienced it - and to contribute to a wider understanding of homelessness and its impact.
from randomrabbit :
The male mind is a simple place. Pretty much: boobs, what's for dinner and boobs. On a constant loop!
from movieboy :
I imagine the emphasis on global warming and green technology in the last few years has taken some of the impact out of the book to first-time readers � it didn�t feel �new� to me; I�ve heard most of it before, with equal negativity and futility. I�m already weary about the whole issue, especially when it�s used as a marketing tool. It�s easy to criticise, but a lot harder to actually provide alternatives. More than likely, if he did list some things that even I could do to help, they�d be woefully inadequate. As for experimenting with different ways of living, people complain about having enough trouble getting by now, with all the technology that makes their lives easier. Sure, maybe that means it�s not working for them. But to truly change, there�d need to be incentives. To go out of their way to make the earth a more sustainable living environment for future generations won�t interest anyone unless they can benefit right now, regardless of what their habits will do to the planet after they�re dead. On a whole, people are short-sighted. And they need things spelled out for them. So far, the �message� has been to embrace the past, or to apathetically blame those currently in power. Unfortunately, it�s going to get worse before it gets better, but there are genuine efforts being made to improve, which is in direct opposition to the me-first celebrity culture that makes people spend more than they can afford. I know that calling it a lecture and not fiction is more of a fact than a criticism, but when 99% of the book is unrealistic dialogue (or telepathy, or whatever), you have to draw the line somewhere, you know? That said, I�m keeping the fuck away from Derrick Jensen�s books. As you might have noticed, the topic itself doesn�t interest me very much. Musk sticks: pink, pencil-shaped confectionary. Sounds like the gayest thing ever, I know. They actually smell pretty great. I�m sorry to have given such savage reviews to your recommendations so far � �Ishmael� and �Holy Grail�. I�m really normally not that critical about things that are supposed to be enjoyable entertainment. But they were absolutely worth my time. Fear not � I still have confidence in you!
from movieboy :
A few things. Firstly, �Ishmael�. I hated it. Well, not really, but it was still a broad, arrogant and repetitive philosophical lecture very loosely disguised as a fictional novel. Of course I agreed with what it was trying to say, but I found its constant analogies, pessimism and loathing of humanity dull and ineffective. Its only real solution was to �Pass it on.� Well, that�s been happening, but it�s only gotten worse, and will continue to do so unless PEOPLE can benefit in the short-term. Its point about Leavers� lives being uncomplicated by depression and anxiety was one of the few worthwhile points of �Palm Sunday�, the Vonnegut book I�ve spoken about before. He attributes modern isolation and loneliness and the need to latch onto religions and other groups to a lack of extended family structures that used to be commonplace. And it WAS refreshing that Ishmael said any community that relies exclusively on humanitarian aid needs to learn to fend for itself. Nevertheless, I had to stop reading it for about a month; I think it lost me somewhere around the point it referred to �the gods� in every sentence. Not that I regret having read it, but I�m astounded that it has inspired such a devoted fan base, and I�ve found myself agreeing with most of the one-star reviews listed on Amazon � I liked the ideas but not the execution. I was also amused to find that it somehow influenced a movie � �Instinct�, with Anthony Hopkins and Cuba Gooding Jr. And who am I kidding? I�ll have to see it. I can�t say I�m interested enough to want to read its sequels unless you hold me at gunpoint, but I AM curious about �Providence�, his autobiographical book. Have you read it? Based on what little I know of his life thanks to Google searches, I imagine Quinn basically takes the place of the narrator, with a monk standing in for Ishmael teaching him the supposed evolution of man. Other stuff: I noticed during the credits of a �Bill & Ted� movie recently that one of Richard Matheson�s sons created the series and wrote both movies. Halloween: do you know what the hell a musk stick is? Wikipedia tells me they�re only available �down under�, and it�s something YOU might be missing out on, if that�s the case. I don�t think this counts as a birth story, but I was born on a Friday the 13th. I�d also be interested in viewing the security footage of public �pelvic thrusts and zombie mimicry�. That is all.
from smashthegas :
hehe email me at smashthegasATrock.com and I will tell ya the kinda stuff I done. Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
Nothing wrong with idolising her, no way. Just ya know... be yourself was all I meant. I wasn't trying to sound sanctimonious, hehe. I never had any flair for art, and still don't. I can do some acting and a little singing, but as for drawing/painting, I did try but seriously I don't "see" things right, so I can't replicate them on paper.
from smashthegas :
You're beautiful and talented already. And anyway, you don't need to "live up" to your mother. I bet she loved you as you are, and as such, you should continue to just be you. Smashxxx
from smashthegas :
Wow, your mother was really beautiful.
from movieboy :
Halloween really seems like a timeless, fun holiday. We're obviously missing out. I do remember going trick-or-treating a few times when I was younger, but it was usually pretty fruitless. And candyless. It just doesn't have any awareness here; not really sure why. LOVED your Nicole Simpson idea. Well, I'm lucky to have such a devoted fan! I'm more frustrated than pissed off about it. It's what I want to do more than almost anything, but I just don't have the energy most of the time. Still haven't finished 'Ishmael', but fairly recently I read a chapter where Ishmael was saying we're basically going to run out of food at our current rate of consumption. On the same day, there was a news report about cloned animals being safe to eat.
from movieboy :
The main holidays we don't celebrate are Thanksgiving and, to a large extent, Halloween. Unfortunately my business isn't due to anything new, just more intense versions of the same old bullshit.
from trapezoid :
Thanks for remembering me. Needless to say, V-day was a hell of lot better this year.
from bobbiedylan :
all is good... dekalb is about 30 minutes from me, but my sister goes to that school so of course i freaked out when i heard. but... luckily she was at a friend's apartment off campus and she and all her friends are fine. im thankful for that! thanks for thinking of us!
from movieboy :
Yeah, he went out pretty lonely for a guy with so much money. Probably good for him to have an irritating nephew like Mark to get him out of the, uh, trailer every now and then. As you wish! - the next recommendation is 'American Splendor'. The quietness is not by choice, believe me. I've been well, just busy. And yes, we 'celebrate' Valentine's Day here, it being a commercialised, non-religious holiday and all. I hope you've been spoilt appropriately!
from movieboy :
Sports coaches (especially at the high-school level) could suck the life out of just about anyone. And I'd be completely depressed about Mike (the guitar-playing hippie) if he wasn't so blisfully unaware of what he's done to himself. So did you actually like them, or should I keep any recommendations to myself from now on? I'm still only halfway through 'Ishmael' so you'll have to BEAR with me for now :P
from smashthegas :
We suck huh? HUH? *growlz at you ferociously, baring nastily sharp pointed teeth*
from urbancadence :
Haha! There are some VERY stupid people in this country who really have no business voting! There's been so much rallying to get people to vote ever since the '04 elections, which I think is not entirely a good thing. Sure, we get more people voting, but I bet that the number of people who end up voting just for the sake of voting far outnumbers the number of people who end up voting for the right (non-stupid reasons). I think that generally speaking, there's lots of concern about voter apathy, but the way I see it, the apathetic shouldn't vote anyway. And as for Clinton... well IMO, she would make a fine president. It's about damn time we got a man in the White House anyway. (*Ba-da-CHING!*) Thank you ladies and gentleman! I'll be here all week!! :-)
from bobbiedylan :
im stealing the video. aaaaand i completely agree with your prediction. its pretty frustrating.
from bobbiedylan :
happy birthdays to the both of you! and congrats on the weight lost!
from smashthegas :
Happy birthday darling! And thanks for your cool comments on my diary... you like my work related dialogues huh? Should I post more? Hehe I wonder sometimes if theyre too dull :( Smashxxx
from rixbear :
Happy birthday, my love!
from bobbiedylan :
hmmm... that is useful information. that would also explain why he loves to roll up his hw as if it were an enormous joint and pretend to smoke it. haha...
from bobbiedylan :
what a sorry ass ho. have you tried telling her to back off, since patrick might have a hard time being as blunt and honest as you can be?
from randomrabbit :
Sometimes smashing someone's face in is the only answer! Not that I in any way advocate the use of violence!
from smashthegas :
Invite her over for dinner and then put poison in the steak. Heh. Smashxxx
from gooligoogoo :
happy new year to you and yours
from smashthegas :
I did that pissed up/drugged up lawlessness thing for about 5 years straight. It was kinda fun. Heh. Smashxxx
from bobbiedylan :
thats effin cute!
from gooligoogoo :
your letter to your sis was lovely. The pic was awesome. You seem like cool sis.
from tithonus :
Wow, you manage to portray a pretty scary picture of what the US is like... I guess from my short time there I did get the impression that "this is not all that great", and there has to be some reason you have such dreadful politicians... hmm, but the combination of such expensive healthcare and those huge student debts is quite scary. I have a HECS debt (same thing, basically) of about US$16,000 but that's after spending a long time at uni and getting a PhD, so it doesn't seem that unreasonable. Plus, the way HECS works you don't pay any interest on the debt and you don't have to pay anything back until your income rises above a certain level... and if you leave the country you don't have to pay it at all. Of course then you lose the benefit of our wonderful system of healthcare, but I guess you can't have everything... That thing of selling your eggs sounds frightening and kind of... I don't know, a bit third-world or something. It's sort of shocking that it would be common practice in what's supposed to be one of the world's wealthiest countries... but I guess most of that wealth is concentrated into a very small number of hands.
from smashthegas :
You're right babe, part of it is the thrill and the adrenaline. It's also a lot more, but I'm a dumb dude so I can only wish I had the words to explain it. Smashxxx
from tithonus :
Sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you... things have been a little busy, settling down now, I think if I'd waited and longer I'd have been overwhelmed by guilt. :( Speaking of which, I have not forgotten that I've promised you a book - some time ago now! - and I still fully intend to send you something. :) Now, let's see what you've said... yes, in Oz you can be a lawyer just having done a Bachelor's, although you do still also have to pass the Bar exam, which I believe is similar to what you've got in the States. In terms of shutting down around awkward topics... I think in a way I'm a person who wants to talk about anything and everything, however difficult or complicated, because I find that talking itself helps at some level... but at the same time, I'm just as awkward as anyone else around difficult topics because I'm kind of hesitant to actually say what I think... I suspect part of it is that I don't trust other people to be willing... or interested in talking about the harder stuff. The philosophy stuff is... probably too long and complicated to go into in a "note", but perhaps I will make that the next thing I write about in the diary. :) People usually live for 5 years after a transplant, but that statistic is a bit skewed because it includes all the people who died during the early era of transplants, and none of the people who're still alive because, you only get added to the stats once you're dead, if you see what I mean. And as time goes on, transplants get better and the immunosuppressant drugs get better and so on. If you're thinking about options of places to live other than the US, consider Australia. ;) If you're under 30 you can get a working holiday visa, come and check the place out for a while... it's not a bad place, in many ways. ;) South Korea has pretty good doctors, I believe, but doesn't have universal free health care like Oz. For the moment I don't really need much except blood pressure drugs; it's only once the kidneys start to go that things are likely to get complicated/expensive. At which point I'll most definitely be coming back to Australia. ;) Speaking of socialised medicine... don't any of the democratic candidates have a plan to bring it in?
from urbancadence :
I've really gotta learn that turning the anger-and-being-a-victim feeling into learn-and-move-on thing. If I don't, then I can't imagine how much baggage I'm gonna be holding on to by the time I turn 35. I wish I could just say to myself, "Let go", and then I do. But anyway, I think it's cool that your ex-bully actually became nice and apologized. People can be real pricks when they're young, but in his case, growing up really did him good. I wish I was still on good terms with my first kiss though... only I don't remember who it was! Doesn't say that much about me, does it? *sob*
from smashthegas :
LOL Americans are too dense. They know fuck all about what exists outside their own little country. Thass why we fuck em over despite them being "superior" ROFL. They're pathetic. Smashxxx
from urbancadence :
You're totally right. It really is for the best - he could have strung me along, and the longer it went, the worse it would have hurt. I know that I will get over this eventually, but it's the time between now and then that really sucks. It's just such a torturous ride, but there's no short cut around it. It came so suddenly - I think I'm still shocked. *Sigh* Thanks for the hug - I really need lots of it! :)
from singledadguy :
For 50 years and more we have had technologies which would allow us to live safely in this environment, with minimal or no impact to it. Why don't we live that way now? Big Business. Specifically Big Oil. BTW... Honor is doing what is right and good even though it cost your life, Duty is doing what you have been told or ordered or conditioned to do.
from urbancadence :
Thanks :( Yeah, my credit (and hence my life) is gonna be screwed up for YEARS. I could keep making the minimum payments, but I really don't deserve to, because they were spent on things that were not mine. Of course, the credit card companies don't give a shit about that... but it's definitely a very costly and torturous lesson for me. I will never ever let ANYBODY ride on my credit ever again (assuming that I'm eventually able to restore it). If I spend money on someone, I will only do it if I'm fully prepared to not get it back. If I'm not, then I won't. Never again will my boundaries of love cross into the financial realm. Now... I just have to figure out how to get my credit (life) back. Sigh.
from antipodean :
Something I just remembered from way back...A biology teacher who was talking about J-curve and S-curve populations: J-curves being opportunistic species that lie in wait for the ideal conditions, then bam, they reproduce and eat and eat and reproduce and eat until there's nothing left to consume, and they die down again - going back to a baseline of almost nothing - waiting to shoot back up again like the long part of the letter 'J', ending abruptly. These are creatures like locusts, desert wildflowers, mice, blue-green algae - plagues and blooms (many of which reach extraordinary proportions because of our activities sending ecosystems out of whack). And then there's the S-curvers - species that wind up slowly and measuredly, relying not so much on an opportunistic cycle of blooming and exhaustion, blooming and exhaustion, but on gradually reaching a balance - homeostasis - with the environment - at the top of the 'S', there is a thermostat wave of little peaks and valleys, maintaining a realtively steady balance of reproduction and death that neither increases nor decreases much beyond a set range (environmental/human pressures notwithstanding): S^^^. What struck me was that after this teacher gave us this little story, he followed on to say that we don't really know for sure if humans are J-curve or S-curve populations; if we're crashers or balancers. My thought is that we're inherently a mixed-bag: it all depends on the cultural systems that guide different ways of living, and securing food and resources. I'd say that what's happened with those societies that took their cultural practices out of the agricultural revolution, is that they've moved into more of a J-curve; and that in fact most civilisations today are still somewhere in the middle of that J, consuming and consuming opportunistically through the mass-scale seizure and manipulation of resources; building of surpluses, the forcing out of those who live otherwise. Without adopting another cultural system which places checks and balances on this process of endless consumption, I'd say we'll follow that J to its end, consume all there is to consume, and go beyond our capacity to keep our numbers anywhere near as high as they are today. And that would be fine if it was only us. Thing is though, this brand of J-curving seems to me to be leaving little left behind for anything else to be supported and sustained in the long-term, let alone leaving a place for a more baseline human population. We're displacing, consuming, replicating, encroaching, extracting and excreting to such an extent that - as in "Ishmael", we're fast leaving nothing but a world made up of our food, the food of our food, and our waste. Hardly a biosphere. Not even really an ecosystem.
from antipodean :
I LOVED reading your latest entry. Here, here! And thanks again for introducing me to "Ishmael". Unfortunately most people think I'm crazy, (no surprise,really) if I ever venture into bringing this argument forward: that the way we've lived - out of the agricultural revolution (not that, sadly, many people even know what this was) - is by no means this great, 'superior', and solely 'legitimate' way of existing in the world, and that in fact, it is downright killing the world and everything within it (anthropocentric agricultural totalitarianism..hehe...there's an 'ism' for the academics). Bleh. It's depressing just thinking about how trapped we all are by this hegemonic way of thinking about ourselves and our relations with the world. Endemic from the moment we're born into it. I totally agree that if there's to be any kind of change to the way it's going, it has to start with a discourse of humility - with a big old reality check. We've really got to start understanding that we're not gods endowed with some inherent 'right' to take over and make the earth our object - something we mostly use to serve our own ends. We need to get past being egotistical children, basically. Got to remember how to be responsible adults; to fundamentally understand, as you said, that the world is not inherently 'ours', but rather a home shared by many besides us (but who, because they don't speak our language or sit as high on our little cognitive maps of hierarchy, are too often written off as mere extras - at best, collateral damage). Fact is, everything - including us, we're really no exception - is intricately intertwined and interdependent. Nothing can stand alone and apart from anything else. Not if life is to go on. Without this realisation, we're bound to take our "we're the be-all-and-end-all" cultural programming to its gloomy conclusion... Long story short, we've got to stop being the housemates from hell!
from antipodean :
Yes, I think my left brain is fairly retarded at times too :) Good to hear from you - hope you and Bear are doing well.
from movieboy :
I totally understand, and admire your resolve and maturity.
from gooligoogoo :
Got the drawing its fantastic. Thank you. You are a very talented individual.
from movieboy :
�Programmed� because it�s in my nature to constantly recommend loosely related movies to people once they show an interest in my initial recommendations. I try to restrain myself, but sometimes can�t help it. I already feel guilty for suggesting �Sicko� � I wasn�t expecting THAT strong a reaction, and this is coming from someone who�s easily swayed by theatrically released documentaries. That�s about the biggest decision you can make, and you�re very young to be making it. You�re hardly the only one with those frustrations and dissatisfactions, but it�s justified � the culture is going to get a whole lot worse before it gets better. I�d be most concerned about logistical things like jobs and apartments and security (the non-terrorist kind), but you never really know what a place is like until you spend at least a few days there. I�m sure you won�t miss the furniture, or much else, once you�re settling down somewhere. Might be worth travelling together first � test a few places out, as well as your relationship, especially if there�s something that nearly broke it up while you were discussing this stuff (very surprising to hear based on your diary, even though it was an isolated issue). Might as well consider it now, if you�re so sure it�s going to happen. And there�s no reason you can�t continue moving if one place doesn�t suit you. It�s your life.
from urbancadence :
Ha! I'm glad I can make you smile, "Snuggle"! ;-) It's making me all giggly like an insane doofus too. Totally cramping my style. :-P
from tithonus :
Hey there... to begin with I just wanted to say thankyou for your kind words, and, you know... I may be considerably less amazing than you might think. ;) I guess it isn't fair, but then, you know... lots of people have much worse luck than I do. I have a supportive family, I live in a first-world country with universal government-funded healthcare, I'm not going to die of starvation or have a bomb dropped on me anytime soon. I guess I was kind of angry about it when I first found out but... well, I guess the thing with me is that I spent a lot of the early years of my life feeling unhappy and that there was no way out of it, if you know what I mean. And I guess I searched hard for a long time for a way of seeing things that I could believe in the solidity of and which would also allow me to feel joy and love and all that sappy stuff even given all the awful things about life which... are there whether you acknowledge them or not. And I guess about 5-6 years ago, I sort of "arrived" at something... a philosophy or a worldview or whatever you might call it, that did allow me to be happy in spite of it all. I mean, I don't know, I don't mean to say I've got "the answer" or anything like that, but I guess it was close enough to being "an answer" that it was something I could manage with... and I did start to feel a lot happier. And it was a couple of years after that that I found out about the PKD, and it sort of... it was bad but it actually wasn't that bad. For the moment anyway I find I'm able to accept it as... I don't know, sort of, part of my personal share of bad fortune, to go with my personal share of good fortune. Perhaps as it gets worse I'll become less philosophical about it and more bitter... that's the other thing, see. I'm still kind of in "the easy stage" in the sense that I know something is going to happen, but nothing really has actually happened yet. I didn't inherit it - it's a genetic disease but I'm a mutant, just like the X-Men... kinda. ;) Which is one of the lucky things, actually... because neither of my parents has it, and none of my (3) siblings has it, there are lots of potential kidney donors around in the event that I need one. I don't mind talking about it at all, usually people are at a bit of a loss as to what to say and don't say anything, so it makes a refreshing change to be asked so many questions. ;) And, sorry, I didn't mean to misunderstand your relationship comment... I know you meant that my "it'll probably come to nothing" attitude would mean that it probably would come to nothing. I guess I was just kind of striking off on a tangent... I guess partly because there's another part of me that's thinking "this could easily come to something" and also because I do, sort of, have a history of repeating the same kind of bad pattern in relationships. I think because I'm a bit more mature now and because I understand a bit better why it was happening and what might be done about it if it started happening again that I'm reasonably safe from another round of the same thing... but I could just be kidding myself. :) And thankyou for the lemur, it's beautiful! I'm sure your dad isn't actually evil, and, doctor of laws, does that mean he stayed on at university after he'd already gotten what he needed to practice? And thanks again for saying such nice things about me... I don't believe they're true but it doesn't mean it isn't nice to hear them. ;)
from movieboy :
Look forward to your thoughts. Speaking of documentaries, I'm now programmed to pass along my highest possible recommendations for 'American Movie' and 'Hoop Dreams'.
from tithonus :
I'll reply to everything in random order, since you sent me two such long notes. :P First thing, no, I don't mind being barraged with questions, ask all the questions you like. :) I can be a bit compulsive about answering everything but that doesn't mean it troubles me. :) Secondly, the PKD stuff: it affects me minimally at the moment. I have to avoid salty food and various other things, and I experience intermittent mild discomfort in my abdomen, but basically I'm 100% at the moment. It does not in any way affect my ability to "get it on", nor is it contagious. So in the short term, there's no reason for it to interfere with a short-term relationship. But... it does raise some bigger issues, because firstly it's genetic, which means that if I have children they have a 50% chance of inheriting it from me, and secondly, the gradually increasing amount of pain I'm going to be over the next decade or so will gradually make me less and less capable of doing certain kinds of things... and the end-stage involves dialysis or a transplant, neither of which is a permanent solution, and then death, which... well, I don't know when it'll happen, depends on a hundred different things I can't predict, but I could go as early as 40 or as late as 60+. I'm 31 now. So... I guess part of what it means is that... well, there are lots of issues. But it seems like it's important that anyone I was potentially going to get involved with should know about all that stuff at some point reasonably early in the piece. Diabetes is a fairly reasonable comparison but (afaik, anyway) with treatment it's less debilitating and many people with diabetes live well into their 60s, whereas people with PKD die on average at 55 (I think) and usually within 5 years of experiencing kidney failure, and one of my two kidney specialist doctors predicted my kidneys would go at 40. The other has a much more optimistic outlook and so I'm not actually set on the idea that I will actually reach end-stage by 40, but on the other hand I have to consider it a real possibility. I've never been to a Korean BBQ (to change the subject...) because I'm a vegetarian (well, vegequarian) and I don't think they have much that would suit me... but I've certainly eaten plenty of other Korean food. :) I know what you mean about people choosing partners who will confirm their prejudices... I'm not sure that that's what's happening here but I am certainly keeping my eyes open for signs that I'm... re-creating bad situations from my past. And, thanks for the congratulations! I tend not to go to busy restaurants, or indeed, any restaurants, but in the event that I do I will definitely test your theory. So, is your dad actually a doctor or was he just pretending in the name of scientific enquiry?
from tithonus :
Well, having offered to answer all questions, I suppose I ought to actually answer your questions. :P So, my favourite aspect of Korea... I guess there are a few things. I love Korean food - cheap, healthy food is available everywhere, with lots of strong flavours especially in the form of kim chi, a kind of cabbage pickled with chillies and garlic. And I like the people... everyone I met when I was there seemed to be impossible polite, helpful, and considerate. I couldn't find anything on the map in my guidebook, because within moments of my starting to look, someone would come up to me and ask me what I was looking for and offer to show me the way. And I guess it's just interesting to be in a place with a really different language, culture, and history from where I grew up. Regarding me being an obscure animal, then, yes, probably in more ways than one, I guess I am an obscure animal. :P Regarding the offering of sexual favours, I think it was something like, "If it will make all this go away, I will..." with the trailing of dots there signifying a significant silence and a significant "look". I was too overwhelmed by embarrassment to really respond in any meaningful way at all. Um, was that all of the questions? I'm worried I may have missed something...
from gooligoogoo :
can I have a chimp hugging a giraffe please.
from urbancadence :
Yeah you put it the best - gotta let the wine breathe. I really have to watch myself. Thanks for your advice, that's exactly what I'm gonna do this weekend. If he wants to hang out with me, he'll call me. I've done more than enough so far. (P.S. You haven't told me - have you checked out Canlis restaurant yet?)
from smashthegas :
Well a gas masher is a dude (or babe) who likes to drive stupidly fast and pull some good tricks in their ride - in a safe environment like a car park or somewhere I might add - and the mashers are my honorary set of gas mashers that I love, heh. So ya wanna be one? Smashxxx
from bobbiedylan :
thanks for putting up the link to the video. i saw you posted it on myspace but i didnt have time to watch it then and i couldnt find it when i went back a little bit ago. he was hilarious and smart, and the timing was perfect because i am currently pulling out my hair with all this no child left behind and isat standards shit. i was thinking the other day, how bored some of my kids must be with all the shit we are supposed to do with them.
from tithonus :
Mysterious? Me? Take that back! I'm completely unmysterious, so there! Uh, by which I mean, tell me in what way I'm mysterious, and I'll happily answer the question and thereby destroy the myster. :) In answer to your other question: I am (or rather, was) teaching 2nd and 3rd year sociology... one course on health and the other one on "understanding the self". Both of them are kind of mix of philosophy and sociology, actually, but, yeah, done from within the sociology department. I would advise anyone who has any other prospects available to them to stay away from grad school... it's really not a fun time, and it's a really, really long time. :( I am so fucking glad it's all over now... the country I'm think of moving to is Korea (well, South Korea... I'm not that perverse) because I liked it so much last time and because I think I can make a decent living there without having to become a complete slave... and, if I write another update, can I have a lemur as well? I love them, too. :) Growing up I always had a love of animals but especially the weird-looking things that nobody had heard of... of course I like cute animals as well, but weird animals are still my first love. :)
from gooligoogoo :
your drawings are amazing...Loving the work
from urbancadence :
Hey there!! So sorry for this super-late response, but I've been away from d*land for quite a while, but I'm back now! Thanks for the congrats regarding the New Guy - I'm cautiously optimistic at this point :) As for the fires, yes, at least one of them were caused by arsonists. I think they had been arrested. Thank gawd the whole fire situation is over now - it was really horrible. Worst one in quite a while. I live in a very urban area, so I wasn't affected... but I knew of quite a few people who were told to evacuate. Fortunately, none of them had their houses burned down, but it's really too bad we can't say that for so many other people. Such a shame. Anyway, I hope you've been well - I have quite a bit of journal entry catching up to do with ya! Take care! (P.S. Have you gone to Canlis yet?) :)
from randomrabbit :
I adore the picture, thank you. That's really made my day :)
from randomrabbit :
Thank you so much! I'm really touched you'd draw something for me. I'm always in awe of anyone who can draw or do anything creative for that matter! Well I updated! I'm not sure it's worthy of a picture though! Maybe I should try again tomorrow! I Knew your boyfriend had a blog here, but I didn't realise you'd met on DL! There is a DL girl, yes :)
from tithonus :
Aww, man, awesome! Those tapirs look fantastic, I love them, thankyou!
from smashthegas :
Actually it's cars but lately I have taken to riding my buddy's motorbike so it is accurate as well as clssy! Smashxxx
from movieboy :
I love all of them, and I still can't figure out how anyone can be coordinated enough to draw a cat or an owl with any degree of accuracy. Being impressed with the black t-shirt was my first reaction ... then I couldn't help wondering if drawing me holding a banana was subconsciously related to my frequent masturbatory references. Anyway, it's cute and awesome and absolutely the first time someone's drawn anything for me, and I totally appreciate it :)
from tithonus :
Tapir?
from movieboy :
I'm incredibly impressed with all of them! Very cute. I'm honoured. Thank you. (And cue a jokey varation of 'You had to draw me holding my banana, didn't you?')
from smashthegas :
Hee! I LOVE it! Thank you babes! Smashxx
from smashthegas :
Ooh if I update will ya draw me a big growlly tiger? Smashxxx
from gooligoogoo :
love your sketch
from movieboy :
'Loose Change' was extremely interesting. It had a bit of an 'I edited this in my Mum's basement for five grand' vibe, but I'm definitely glad I saw it. The whole 'It's not Osama because he's holding a microphone and eating with his right hand!' thing was a bizarre allegation to make in the first place, and now, as you point out, an embarrassing oversight, but my first reaction to that footage was 'Um, that doesn't look anything like Osama.' For a few basic explanations that not many people question, there are a few too many inconsistencies � 9 out of 19 'hijackers' being tracked down alive and uninvolved, numerous reports of explosions in the towers, the potential evidence recovered from computers and all the put options on airline stocks suspiciously close to 9/11, the unconvincing debris and stolen surveillance footage from Flights 77 and 93... But it does make some claims and assumptions that aren't very professional. I think the voice-recognition technology supposedly used to call relatives from Flight 93 was a bit of a goddamn stretch, particularly. It wasn't mentioned in the documentary, but I also remember Bush standing around the debris from the Twin Towers saying words like 'war' without any reasoning. But that's Bush, I guess. If there was a conspiracy, would anyone have even told him about it? That television interview at the end with the Muslim lecturer amused the hell out of me. I think all the reactionary patriotism stuff has been covered sufficiently by Moore before (plus, you really need to see 'Sicko'). I'm torn between being curious for more information, especially about the claims from 'Loose Change', but at the same time don't want this to turn into a Zodiac-like obsession. Favourite animal? I haven't been asked that since I was like eight. I don't know. A, um ... monkey. Or tiger. Or wolf of some kind. Why? Want to paint one for me? Thanks for posting 'Postmodern Woman' � I already love it and look forward to more!
from barefootruby :
glad you like it. There is a reason behind the name, but it's a long story.
from rixbear :
You are an AWESOME artist!!!
from gooligoogoo :
Thanks for adding me as a veiwed diary Im now so popular 2 people read me hehe. I was moved by your intense featuring weather entry..makes my trivial shit seem even more trivial. I send kind thoughts to you. I also love the rain especially extreme rain. Not to dis your friend but its familiar to Bon Jovi " I need you like the roses need the rain" but the loves still there.
from movieboy :
I never found Palahniuk 'intense' or his profanity 'distracting', but then again I read them all pretty quickly, so I was probably desensitised by the time I got to 'Lullaby' (not missing out on much). I'm the same � I have a signed copy of 'Fight Club' (long story) that I refuse to read so as not to ruin the movie, and when I got sick of waiting for the 'Lord of the Rings' movie sequels, I tried to read the books ... but found them unreadable, and their popularity confusing, especially amongst kids. Somehow the movies were pretty great though. The 'Loose Change' Wikipedia site doesn't exactly fill me with confidence (and the '2nd Edition' thing doesn't help its credibility either), but who doesn't love a good conspiracy theory? I'll watch it in the next couple of days and get back to you. I remember in the hours after the whole 9/11 thing, footage was shown of random desert people supposedly celebrating the attacks, which was soon exposed as complete bullshit, stock footage from something completely unrelated, but it wasn't condemned nearly enough as it should have been. Once the 24-hour coverage finally stopped, everyone was so exhausted and disoriented that they didn't refer to it unless it was necessary, like most deaths or break-ups or anything emotionally traumatic � it was just too devastating. Plus they'd probably be accused of being unpatriotic, which has always been a bizarre concept to me. Before I see 'Loose Change', I will say that a cover-up wouldn't surprise me at all, especially regarding Flight 93, though I don't imagine anything will be truly uncovered for decades, if at all � it will be ignored more than the Kennedy assassination, since it's basically changed EVERYTHING ever since. I have 'Cat's Cradle' around here somewhere too (Amazon binge; don't ask). Erm, how about you just continue posting artwork, which will so inspire me that I'll have no choice but to update once again?
from movieboy :
Most of King's adaptations have been shit, unfortunately. I'm hoping 'The Mist' doesn't fall into that category, although the story itself isn't anywhere near the 'Apt Pupil' level. Judging by all his interviews and introductions and 'On Writing', King seems like pretty much the coolest dorky and goofy guy alive. I think I liked 'Choke' and 'Survivor' the best from Palahniuk. 'Choke' has been filmed and will probably be released in the next year or so, if that makes a difference to you and you haven't read it (in case you hadn't noticed, that's a big motivating factor for getting me to read); although after just confirming that, I notice it has barely one-twentieth the production budget 'Fight Club' had. I've started 'Palm Sunday' already. It's a collection of speeches, letters and essays; not a novel. I don't imagine it's essential reading for him. You should post more of your artwork! I'll definitely look out for 'Loose Change'. 'Sicko' was excellent; pretty close to 'Bowling for Columbine' for me.
from movieboy :
I haven't started �I Am Legend� yet, but I�ve always been intrigued by the trailer for �What Dreams May Come�. Whether that means I�m willing to spend three months trying to read the book it was based on is another thing. Speaking of King, I found �Apt Pupil� legitimately upsetting. As for Vonnegut, I�m reading �Palm Sunday� first, which is stupid, but that�s me. �Slaughterhouse-Five� will probably be next. I�ll definitely let you know what I think of �Ishmael� some time between now and my death. Regarding �Fight Club�, I of course loved the movie and read all Palahniuk�s books until halfway through �Diary�, when I conceded that I couldn�t read another word. I tried to read a single paragraph of �Rant� in a bookstore recently and couldn�t; I'm not sure if it�s my age or his writing that has made the difference. I�ve never actually seen �An Inconvenient Truth�; that was just an observation. And I actually like Michael Moore movies, if that gives an indication of how little it interests me. The media frequently refers to it because it�s a very simple, easily accessible form of evidence, whether its points are valid or not. And Gore�s involvement seemed to lend it an air of credibility, which is weird for someone who couldn�t get voted into Office (or not by enough that it couldn�t be covered up, anyway). I get it though. Our lives are too easy, and technological convenience is ultimately a hindrance. PS � I love your photos and artwork.
from gooligoogoo :
It's the time of year for feeling down. It smells differnt here and its freezing but its good to know people else where feel similar
from bobbiedylan :
the man is HILarious. his reading was amazing and he read from stuff that i have never read myself. my face and stomach hurt afterwards, from laughing so much!
from singledadguy :
Yah - sooo... you're wrong. :D Norrington is NOT honorable. Norrington is duty. He's almost straight out of HMS Pinnafore, or any other G&S musical of that nature. Thaks for visiting me though, :) and I am enjoying reading you.
from bobbiedylan :
wow. you read a lot. i neeeeeed to work on this!
from rixbear :
I think your drawing is awesome!!!
from bobbiedylan :
yea and it suuuucks. i would get your pain checked out asap because i have been living with this for over a year now and he is saying it will be harder to get rid of because i waited so long. bah! i see you added david sedaris to your author list! yay! i am going to see him speak at a college on friday, im pretty excited about that!
from gooligoogoo :
I don't mind people reading my diary its kinda cool...I just forget sometimes that its the net. Glad you liked it anyway. Your conversation with bear had me in stitches
from gooligoogoo :
thanks for checking my diary out. Why me? why that entry? hmph curious
from movieboy :
That's my favourite part too :) Good times. I haven't been updating for various annoying reasons; nothing serious. I intend to start again pretty soon, but if I'm going to do it, I want to be more consistent about it.
from movieboy :
Sure have, and needless to say I love it. Pretty close to love, anyway. I don't own it on DVD or anything, which would be the ultimate compliment. What did you think? I had no recollection of doing your election quiz until receiving your note. None of my favourites update anymore either, and I'm fairly certain most of those who list me as a favourite are now dead.
from bobbiedylan :
i love writing when im hungover as long as i had a good time the night before. it sounds like you had a great time! party on wayne...
from urbancadence :
Aww, thanks so much! :) BTW, I *heart* Seattle. My favorite restaurant in is this place called Canlis, I've been there twice and I'm salivating right now as I'm talking about it. I love walking the streets, and the Pike Place Market has such a wonderful ambiance to it. Anyway, thanks once again for adding me to your favs, I've done the same, and I look forward to getting to know you through yours!
from bobbiedylan :
well you gave me chills just by reading that. i hope everything is ok!
from bobbiedylan :
very pretty! i like the set-up!
from purify-me :
Hey thanks for the tips on handling fanatical Christians!! I will definitely bust out one of those lines next chance I get! And, I totally agree with you about the ending of HP7, but I'm hoping that she was just setting things up for more books ... maybe ... if we�re good little girls and boys ...?
from rixbear :
Yet another reason we could never break up: our books and possessions are so intermixed it would be impossible to get sorted out.
from bobbiedylan :
believe it or not, i actually am! its crazy but my room is bigger and better this year, i have only 16 kids (well so far), and the fifth grade reports on the kids are ten times better than the ones i got last year. my students this year seem to be at a lower learning level, but a lot nicer. the only thing that sucks is that i am on the first floor, which is not air conditioned and its still pretty hot here. oh well, small price to pay!
from antipodean :
Hey old diary buddy! It's been a long time - years, it feels, since I posted :0 Good to be back though. Hope all is going well in the life of sunstargirl :D
from bobbiedylan :
whoo hoo sounds fun!
from tithonus :
Thanks! Yes, it does. :)
from bobbiedylan :
yea... i can handle the baby. its the baby mama that worries me. oh well i guess we will see. he is pretty great tho. one minute he is out-partying me and the next minute he is "dad". i think this could be an interesting summer!!!
from bobbiedylan :
nice. optical jesus trick. that was jesus right?
from tithonus :
Short answer is that I needed money and had a friend who was doing it... I asked her if I could get a job with them and she said, sure, probably. It's surprisingly easy, actually... if there's a substantial Catholic population where you are you could probably do it, too. :)
from oyletmein :
I guess I did! You're so sweet. I'm not sure about Cages of Mind though... it's giving me issues. Not nearly as much as Loving Fools did - you should see how differently it started. Cages of Mind is old. I just got around to posting it now because I don't think it's going to get any better. Loving Fools was from a dream I had the other night. It was emotionally intense and I've been trying to find a way to describe those feelings. Narcissus popped into my head when I woke up, so that one was easy. Which is probably why I like it the most.
from oyletmein :
Thanks! About your question... um... which one? I posted three poems last night.
from bobbiedylan :
wow... that is effed up. i dont know what to even say. it was probably one of those "im going to do this before i really think about it" situations tho...
from bobbiedylan :
well im sure i could guess if i compared to my brother or sister who have never put anything unnatural in their hair... i started dying my hair when i was 12 tho... which is PROBABLY why its falling out.
from jumblygiant :
You have my vote! xoxo.
from tithonus :
:( Families are hard. My thoughts are with you. Probably worth missing at least one family get-together to get the message across that you get along fine without them. Best of luck with it all. :)
from rixbear :
I just wanted to say that I really appreciate everything you do to help me. I love you!
from bobbiedylan :
i just looked up narly in the dictionary and i changed my mind because it is, in fact, NOT a word. fast times at ridgemont high has totally led me astray...
from bobbiedylan :
that IS a lot of cool. maybe even narly...
from rixbear :
You are cool. And no matter how much Britney offers you for your hair, don't sell.
from bobbiedylan :
and im referring to the toothpaste thing.
from bobbiedylan :
haha. thats cute.
from antipodean :
Lol. Just realised I wrote an entry today in the exact same format :-)
from bobbiedylan :
youre right - it is him. hes lying to the new girl too. bah hes a jerk.
from bobbiedylan :
thank you. i agree. you wont need to beat me up... ;-)
from bobbiedylan :
haha... now that i think of it - they should put those huge mirrors in mexican fast food places. maybe that would stop me.
from bobbiedylan :
yea those effin mirrors... kind of makes me want to run more tho after seeing my jiggle jigglin' everywhere. it doesnt help me stop eating burritos tho.
from bobbiedylan :
haaaaaaaappy birthday! is 24 the new 21, too?
from tithonus :
Happy Birthday, kid! :D Sorry, I've been a slackarse and still haven't sent you that book, but rest assured that I haven't forgotten and one of these days out of the blue it's going to arrive and surprise you. ;)
from rixbear :
"But for now, let me say I love you..."
from bobbiedylan :
sorry to hear! and yea - our school would fall apart if it wasnt for the two amazing secretaries!
from bobbiedylan :
i had to add... i just bought an ipod and i never let go of it, i love it so much. its basically my new best friend.
from bobbiedylan :
yea... hes not really dazzling me too much yet tho. maybe thats because hes three hours away?
from bobbiedylan :
i only remember phrases such as "duh" or "psyche" from back in MY day, but then again... i still talk like that.
from arianrhad :
Eh, it's more annoying than anything else. The dream was creepy though. Haven't had a good old fashioned nightmare in a while. I thought the title was cool though. It popped in my head when I woke up and was stuck in my head all day.
from rixbear :
Aww... I'm sorry, sweetie. (Hug)
from r-e-v-i-e-w :
Your review is up! Sorry for the long wait!
from trapezoid :
Great job on the Southpark characterizations! I used the site a while back to make my friend and I, modeled right after a photo of us together.
from bobbiedylan :
so this is weird to read about because one of my ex's called me last night too, kind of out of nowhere... and the conversation was almost identical to what yours seems it was. its all thanks to myspace. i feel differently than you tho because, obviously, im not in love - im not even getting laid anymore. but still an odd coincidence.
from bobbiedylan :
your entry made me laugh after a tiring day. that kid was hilarious and adorable...
from antipodean :
The day I read your note about being an Ishmaelite, I went on a quest to find the first book in the series. I absolutely loved it - pulled a lot of my own questions together in a unified way. Thank you so much for introducing me to it :)
from bobbiedylan :
i find your last entry to be extremely entertaining!
from bobbiedylan :
yea... honey mustard. in the end the story that i got was that he accidently put it into his bookbag after making his sandwich for lunch. this kid is pure comedy 97% of the time, i just wish he came to school more than twice a week.
from trapezoid :
Sure, feel free to add me. As for MENSA, it's hit or miss depending on what region you live in. Some city's local groups will have people who are fun to be with, others will have a group dominated by snobs. The national benefits are there though. Regarding the membership fee for the COS, that shouldn't discourage you into looking into the religion itself. To me that would be like saying "Well the official Pink Floyd fan club wants $20 a year for membership, so I won't bother listening to their music." Obviously to be a fan of a rock band you don't have to join their official fan club; you just have to like their music. The club would be there for those who might additionally want to get or contribute more, network with other Pink Floyd fans, to be a central source to clear up band-related rumors, etc. Hopefully you see the analogy. Speaking as a COS member myself, the one-time lifetime membership fee I paid years and years ago has brought me a hell of a lot more than "just a card"! We're not for everybody and we don't proselytize, but for those who like what they see (and aren't trouble-makers) the door is open.
from trapezoid :
Thank you very much for your note. I'll probably add another entry soon with a new update (in short, I think it's over; seems walking away is the right thing to do right now). I liked your blog on family planning by the way.
from purplegrl99 :
I like your profile grl! Lol!
from bobbiedylan :
im jealous! good luck!
from arianrhad :
My dear Livie, have we had any other roommates? Of course the amputated one was Kacy! And we are still not sorry to have him gone; gangrene limbs must be removed lest they infect the rest of the body, you know. As for the phone minutes... why have them if not to use them? Dads are so weird. What are your plans for Thanksgiving? My mom called the other day to inform me that she was over 50 and therefore I would be cooking. Good to know. Sucks that I have to wait 30 years and a birth or two to use that excuse!
from bobbiedylan :
aaaahhhhhhhh yay for you kids! your brother is right... although its super hard to get to that point. it took me a looooong time to get there and then i lost it REAL quick when i got a little lazy, and then you have to start all over again. but i swear that its worth it. running even (eventually) makes you less hungry. ahem... well supposedly.
from bobbiedylan :
happy to hear about the whoopie. my evil parents put my bike out with the trash. boooo.
from bobbiedylan :
aw, you are the sweetest...
from enjoyadrian :
have you seen 'the science of sleep'? It's Michel Gondry's (director of eternal sunshine) latest film. I am in love with that movie. Both movies actually. Yep =)
from bobbiedylan :
i havent seen a REALLY scary movie in a loooong time.
from tithonus :
I guess for me, dland was mainly about... three other people who I felt very close to. None of them posts here anymore, or at least, not regularly. So... yeah. Occasionally I do post something because... of nostalgia or something. But... it sort of feels like the past, here, these days. Probably when I finish the thesis I will come and say it's all over. :)
from bobbiedylan :
thanks i know i will!
from rixbear :
My thumb is healing up very well, thank you very much.
from bobbiedylan :
aw thats so cute!
from movieboy :
I guess it boils down to: I enjoy the construction of sentences. There�s something you probably never thought you�d read. I�ve certainly never been called a natural-born storyteller before. It�s been a few days now and I still don�t know how to rationally respond to that. You obviously haven�t read my diary pre-2004! You are, um, much more well-read than I am, to put it mildly. I�m usually told I remind people of Bukowski. Sometimes it�s Ellis and Palahniuk (the only real direct influences), and also David Foster Wallace. I�m not sure if any of those are supposed to be compliments, but that�s fine. I�m not trying to impress anyone. I used to try and make each entry self-contained, but I realised recently when I wrote something and decided not to post it that this actually does have a vague storyline. The ironic thing is I hate talking about myself - like right now. I just had to let you know I appreciate the bizarre natural-born storyteller comment!
from bobbiedylan :
i have a mentor and the most amazing staff at the school i work at. (well most of them anyways). its just unorganized because we have a new principal and superintendant - all the rules are changing - even the veteran teachers are freaking out. also... im a complainer. vocally i will stress a complaint once or twice and suck it up. but in this diary i just let it aaaalllllll out. ;-) and the prom thing... yea... i wouldnt even know how to begin explaining that. hes still around here every now and then tho... and hes still a douche bag.
from movieboy :
I can tell that pretty much for the rest of my life, whenever someone makes a reference to �The Holy Grail� I will at least enjoy that I know what they�re talking about. The killer bunny rabbit was another classic. And I�m relieved to hear you didn�t like �Brazil�; one of the worst movies I can remember enduring. Anyway! I can�t thank you enough for your kind words on my diary. Now that it�s in the past, I can lump the wrist scars and a lot of other miscellaneous depression on teenagehood. I don�t have any of those urges anymore whatsoever. You�re �honoured� to read about the mostly mundane aspects of my life?! Your wishes mean a lot to me. I have virtually no audience, so to get any kind of legitimate feedback is very rewarding to me. And I hope you actually ENJOY reading as opposed to it just making you sad � it bothers me that most of the time I�m trying to be funny and people only tell me I�m depressing!
from movieboy :
PLEASE tell me that means you hated �Brazil� too. I will say I found the flight patterns of sparrows to be an amusing recurring joke in �The Holy Grail�. I hope in saying the best jokes are towards the end that you didn�t mean the last three minutes or so. I�m not so sure it was intelligent, but if you�re comparing it to today�s comedies maybe you have a point. Everyone says it, but I don�t buy the �British humour� tag either; I think it�s specific to the Pythons. Anyway, no probs in checking it out; it was pretty inexcusable I hadn�t seen it in the first place. Any more recommendations for me? Don�t hesitate. I�m aggressively unpretentious in the movies I watch. I�ll see anything.
from movieboy :
�WE HAVE GUNS�� Wow, didn�t see that coming. At least the cops are efficient in your area. Good times. So, �The Holy Grail�. I thought I�d give it a few days before giving a negative, reactionary impression. As expected, my opinion of it has grown in that time. That being said, I don�t think I laughed once. It was certainly better than �Life of Brian� and �The Meaning of Life�, but to me it still felt like being sober in a room full of drunk people trying to impress each other. I would have guessed it was a generational or maturity thing, but given that you recommended it we can ignore that. I don�t really like many �comedies� and I watched it by myself (sober), which mightn�t have been the best viewing circumstances in hindsight. (Disclaimer: �Curb Your Enthusiasm� and the UK version of �The Office� are two comedies I adore.) I will at least have certain Moments etched into my brain � the aggressive limbless knight, catapulted animals, the wedding massacre, finally understanding what nerds are referring to when they say �Ni� and laugh to themselves. I also liked most of the animation stuff. But ultimately it joins �MASH�, �Brazil� and �Miller�s Crossing� in the list of movies whose popularity perplexes me. But I�m still glad I saw it!
from bobbiedylan :
haha... good story. i egged this guy's car once, with a gf. he found out and smashed in her passenger side window the next night while we were illegally drinking at a bowling alley. so we had to pick up all of the glass and then set-up the entire scene at my house, so that our parents didnt find out where we were hanging out. i had shards of glass stuck in hands... it really hurt. then a year later i went to prom with that guy. ha. siiiiick.
from genusevil :
Psychopaths have their uses. Who�s the pixie in the photo?
from rixbear :
I love you, silly girl. P.S. No more freaking out if I don't call! Sometimes no news is good news, and all that... my promise to you is this: I will call to let you know that we got there safely, the trip-itinerary (which you'll probably already know, since we usually get paper copies of it a week or so in advance), and when you can expect me back. Okay?
from bobbiedylan :
aw... you are being paranoid. its funny because you dont seem (as much as you possibly could from the other side of the country) like the type to get "girl-paranoid". and all i can really say is dont worry so much!
from genusevil :
Whales are overrated, orphans are creepy, Katrina is a silly name for a natural disaster (it sounds more like a high school cheerleader, don�t you think?), and I was never fully convinced of your mental stability to begin with. Note to self: operation Drive Sunstargirl to Madness is coming along smoothly. Victory is mine! (Also, you may try used bookstores � although I hear that may simply be a pseudonym for a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read. Has L.A. descended so far?)
from arianrhad :
I know! I was furious earlier - but now it's just funny.
from antipodean :
I feel your pain. I live in a country which has pretty much always given preference to Philistine tendencies. Alas, we must live in those small literary interstices which still bravely carry on :)
from arianrhad :
You�re thinking of The Innamorati, by Midori Snyder - One of my all-time favs. The first thing I did was make a mental inventory of all the books I wanted to send you� you know, right before I thought I�d better get a job so I could actually afford to do that.
from movieboy :
I finally found a place with �The Holy Grail� and have to return it within six days. A warning: I DID find �The Life of Brian� all those months ago, and � well, I didn�t so much as smirk throughout the whole movie. My dad absolutely did not read any of those books. I�ll have to find it myself. I�m an impossibly slow reader � if I�m going to read all his books, which is really the only option, I might as well do it in order. Of COURSE I take your recommendations seriously. I�ll give anything a chance, but you sound like you know what you�re talking about so I�ll give you the benefit of the doubt. Even if you didn�t give ME the benefit of the doubt in knowing what Carnegie Hall is! I�ll get back to you about �The Holy Grail�.
from explodingboy :
Dear sunstargirl thank you very much for your kind comment, and welcome to the explodingboy diaries. As I guess you know the eb diaries are a mixed media sound journal so click stuff and turn on your speakers. Now on to your question - there are only a couple of original tracks hidden away in the depths of the journal, most of the songs that have something to do with journal entry of the day or just something emoting the mood - usually straight from the artists cd but sometimes remixed or mixed up in someform. So thank you so much for your lovely "revue" in your profile notes and again welcome. ebstar.
from arianrhad :
Yeah, I don't know what their damage is. At least it's amusing us!
from movieboy :
Shouldn�t be long now. I�m sorry I haven�t been in touch with you for so long. I originally told myself I would see �The Holy Grail� before speaking to you again. But no fucking video stores around me have it. Then I thought, �I�ll read �Ishmael�.� And my dad borrowed the sequel from the library, even though I specifically warned him about that. So now I haven�t spoken to you in like a year and it�s sounding bizarre, but I have been reading your every entry and loving them and you are exceptionally cute. Take care!
from arianrhad :
must... resist... urge... to... leave... another... note... for... Livie... bwaaaaaaghaaaaaarhhhh! (That is supposed to be an addict's primal scream � verbalizing the horrendous internal struggle of avoiding one's fix.)
from arianrhad :
Rubber gloves are lovely... however, Carmen finds that they tend to hold the water in them just as well as they keep water out (funny, ain't it?). Also, Devon wholly agrees with your theory about the paper-criers.
from arianrhad :
Ah yes, the people of Yabo (the Yabonese or Yaboninans, if you will � consensus has yet to be reached on a name for these people) have a rich and varied cultural history. For example, did you know they have no word for �purity� in their language? Indeed, they have no concept of �pure� in their culture � they believe all things are mixed to varying degrees. Hence, there is no wholly �good� thing, nor any entirely �bad� thing. As a result of this, the people of Yabo have no idea what Bush is talking about in his speeches. Some anthropologists have pointed out that most Americans don�t either.
from arianrhad :
Yeah, parents are weird. My father's gone from an anti-government, anti-military, bellbottom wearing, quasi-hippy to an old republican who thinks military service is "character building." Don't your parents know they're Marin lawyers? Something must be done�. Should we ground them or give them a time out?
from arianrhad :
Wow, you're the first person to get it in one guess! Don't worry, you're not the only one bad with birthdays (*cough cough*). Something surprising? Lexi remembered and called me... now I feel the bitch for not calling her on hers! So it goes.
from bobbiedylan :
hes hot and cold. we are starting a behavior plan for him which was MY idea and i dont know why they didnt think of something like it before. he does have some issues although they are difficult to point out. i thought it was his parents at first. his parents are unmarried and never were married AND had him very young, which can hurt a kid in certain cases. but they are both VERY involved in his life, so im still not sure what sets him off. sometimes he is so mean to his classmates. and hes pretty smart...eh... im going on and on and i have to shut up.
from bobbiedylan :
ew... good job. im glad you quit.
from arianrhad :
What a disgusting way to treat your employees! What are they thinking?! Ugh. How frustrating. It�s a wonder they�re able to stay in business at all. Here�s to leaving stupid-ass people to deal with their own shit.
from bobbiedylan :
aw youre so creative, i like that sunflower entry. and your hair... GORgeous.
from rixbear :
lol You're cute. Our sunflower-expedition was a great success, I think.
from arianrhad :
Ha! They ate them - I love it!
from bobbiedylan :
get on wit yo bad self!
from jumblygiant :
hope all is well girly girl. miss ya.
from rixbear :
Heh... I AM kinda hot shit, aren't I? I mean, I'd never really noticed it before, but DANG!
from bobbiedylan :
im sorry to read about all your drama! and thank you for keeping your fingers crossed for my job search! ill be teaching 6th grade math... haha! im glad you have rixbear to help you get through all your shite! i hope things start to get better soon.
from bobbiedylan :
oh jeez... i feel your pain. i hate dirty old men.
from antipodean :
Your mum would be absolutely brimming with pride at your incredible artwork. It's powerful, how our loved ones become such an inspiring force in our lives, bringing out all kinds of beauty we might never have discovered if we didn't have these people to love and seek and grow closer to in everything that we do and dream.
from rixbear :
Grrr... I shall have to do something unpleasant to the annoying guy at your work. He shall pay! Ha ha ha... (goes off to plot)
from hbaybee :
Lookin for a diary review? Don't be silly, of course you are! Come to Hitlar Baybee Reviewz for the best review this side of the time-space continuum =D x
from bobbiedylan :
i accidently sent that one before finishing it. a purse party is seriously as it sounds. you sit around with a bunch of females and look at purses, usually imitation LV, D&B, and COACH purses and you buy one or two or twelve depending on how crazy you are. sometimes theres alcohol, usually there is only snacks to munch on. the company that provides the purses always sells them cheaper at the party than they would regularly. i dont konw, personally i think its stupid and i prefer to walk into a target or charlotte russe and walk out with a ten dollar purse that i will use until it has holes in it or something.
from bobbiedylan :
oh DEFINITELY screw that job bs. and a purse party...
from ddropk :
Hahaha, thanks. XD
from bobbiedylan :
hes pretty great. and yes, some of my gfs are ridiculous.
from arianrhad :
Also, the notes work now... speaking of notes, how many can I leave you in an hour? Sheesh.
from arianrhad :
In response to the note you left me: yeah, I wrote those. You like them? That's so awesome! I'm all warm and fuzzy inside. Also, to italicize words use some basic html. To italicize the word "fun" write out: <i>fun</i>. I've just been experimenting to see what works and what doesn't. Thankfully this site is very forgiving!
from arianrhad :
Ugh... sounds like an excruciatingly frustrating conversation. Very familiar too... please tell me it wasn�t who I think it was.
from imlogan :
yeah graffiti in LA isnt smiled apon, here its pretty chill, in LA its a fucking felony, dudes have gone to jail with murderers and rapist for putting paint on a wall? thats beyond me? it is fun tho, a city would be alot more fun with legals everywhere, color is nice. seeya
from antipodean :
Thank you =) I'm doing way better now - just some 'issues' I needed resolving. I totally agree with what you wrote in your latest entry - it's a scary concept to think that some people today are vehemently believing that corporations are our friends and that depression has no other context but individual choice. It isn't a promising notion at all.
from imlogan :
thanks, where are you from? or who are you haha?
from ddropk :
Thank you for that insight. I never really thought of it that way.
from rixbear :
Of course! Always and Forever!
from bobbiedylan :
youre so sweet! i think at this point i am just a little overwhelmed with my secret agent beeper and it will take some getting used to.
from bobbiedylan :
um yeah...thats straight skanky, huh? shes jealous.
from bobbiedylan :
yes i am sooo thankful for your input in my comments because your advice makes more sense than any advice that i usually get from someone my age. hmmm... but yea we broke up because he is dishonest. (what a shocker huh?) and i think the reason this whole thing is so difficult is becuase half of me feels that i would better off without him altogether.
from arianrhad :
ooh! Your new painting is different from the ones I've seen before. I can't wait to see what you do with it! (and how did you get the pics up?)
from arianrhad :
Aww, that's so cute. Ya know... in a sexual maniacal sort of way, I guess.
from bobbiedylan :
i notice this all the time! im sure its because they dont have the intelligence to question their religion or read up on it on their own, they just believe what theyre told! im sorry youre missing bear so much! i dont think you would have any luck making friends in a bar anyhow but im not sure how you could go about meeting normal people. this might be a stupid or the wall suggestion, but i think you really might be able to meet people on myspace. maybe? i also met one of my good friends in a music store, right by the radiohead cds. jeez i really dont know im just throwing ideas out there! haha!
from bobbiedylan :
congratulations manager! and i probably spelled congratulations wrong cuz i think i do it everytime. you get the idea!
from arianrhad :
Ah, what a good feeling: to do something and do it damn well! I'm glad things are going better at work and all's well on the home-front too!
from bobbiedylan :
more than dove! wow...im very happy for the two of you!
from rixbear :
My dearest love, thou art my waking and my dream, both the sun and moon on my horizon... but DAMN, it takes a lot to get you out of bed!
from arianrhad :
Academic motivation? Come out academic motivation! Olli olli oxen-free! Come out, come out where ever you are! Hmm� I�m working on it at least. Thanks babe � you always know what to say.
from arianrhad :
only when I'm out of soup...
from antipodean :
I agree - although I'm beginning to realise that these things aren't necessarily mutually exclusive. I can have them both, if I'm willing to commit to them. But at this stage of development, of nurturing a future, each 'passion' needs to have its own turn of attention. Thank you once again for your wonderfully insightful thoughts. I hope you and Bear change the world some day, in your own beautiful way =)
from bobbiedylan :
that is the longest and most informative note i have ever gotten. i learned more in your message than i did at the meetings that ive attended because of john-john (which he hasnt recently asked me to call him because i am now going to be working with him after school) and those meetings included liscensed specialists and a psychologist.
from antipodean :
True. Oh so very true. Love your most recent entry, by the way. Nice to experience a little brevity around here =)
from bobbiedylan :
hilarious! an excellent start to my day.
from rixbear :
And in the country of Patrivia, the national plant will be a fern in the shape of Freud's mother.
from arianrhad :
Aw working... rewarding in so many ways! There's the paycheck, the sense of purpose and self-fulfillment, the migraines... Congrats on the new job!
from arianrhad :
Yes, I'll admit I found the sodomizing sentence wholly satisfying!
from bobbiedylan :
yea i dont know. i dont even have time to think about it really with all this school shite...luckily my freakout rampage only lasted a short while!
from bobbiedylan :
without a doubt, much better. but then again, im likely to change my mind.
from antipodean :
Thanks =) I had a great European adventure. Been back a week now, but still catching up on the whole updating thing (not to mention overcoming a major dose of jet lag after being unable to sleep for most of the four (ugh!) connecting plane flights it took to eventually bring us home.
from rixbear :
Awww... wuv ems ma Wivie-kins snuggle-bunny! lol
from jumblygiant :
oh livvie. i could not be happier for you (and the bear). it is so good to read about someone being happy in a relationship as opposed to all of the awful relationships out there. yay for you two!
from rixbear :
Thank you for the shampoo! See you tonight... (wink)
from arianrhad :
Think Bear would consider training others? Cus my dear and darling roommate needs some thoughtful-boy obedience school - stat!
from bobbiedylan :
i think he has some morals, hes just very apathetic. my gf thinks he is evil because he has had sex with a woman who was 37 a few years ago, because he doesnt practice religion, he drinks way too much, and says whatever the hell he wants with no regard for feelings or consequences. hes funny. hes an asshole. hes blunt. and he is most likely a waste of my effin time.
from arianrhad :
Offending the customer, what a brilliant sales strategy. What disgusting treatment. Does the woman not realize she works retail? And jewelry is usually a commission gig � what a stupid bitch.
from arianrhad :
Lol - you know, even though that's not what I meant, as soon as I wrote it out I thought you might see it that way! (And the guy makes me a little horny anyway - if only he weren't gay... or fictional!)
from bobbiedylan :
growing up is scary. and exciting!!! you seem like you are doing a great job and im sure youll continue because you have the ability to be flexible and have a great sense of humor. and duh... youre in LOVE! i dont think rixbear is a bad influence to you at all. ive been listening to the weirdest assortment of music lately, i cant even remember the last time i popped in a phish cd. as a matter of fact thats what im going to do right now.
from rixbear :
Stop looking over my shoulder while I type! I can't concentrate!
from antipodean :
I'm looking forward to the trip, however unreal it seems right now, just days from departure. Yeah, I saw the connection between you and Rixbear. You're both incredible writers. How (and sorry if this sounds corny), but how romantic that the two of you met through writing here. What a beautiful thing. Forget my foray with Kavvy - you and Rixbear completely win in this regard =)
from bobbiedylan :
my sister just read it and said it was hilarious. unfortunately, it is taking me forever to get to it because being a teacher sucks. ;-)
from arianrhad :
Thanks, love
from bobbiedylan :
i spelled it wrong, first of all- its david sedaris, and he writes mostly memoirs about himself and his family. his family is insane, it hilarious. and he has ocd, which in a sort of fucked up way, is funny. im in the middle of "naked" and its great, and my sister has read 3 of his books and i always hear her laughing out loud in the next room...
from bobbiedylan :
have you read any david segaris?
from bobbiedylan :
loved the almost true story...
from arianrhad :
go team me
from antipodean :
I'm sorry that your brother won't let you squeeze into his suitcase =) Yeah, this will be my first time overseas. Australia is so damn geographically removed from the rest of the world that it becomes this epic (and incredibly expensive) journey to go anywhere further than Indonesia or South-East Asia (which are also on my list of future adventures =)). I'm looking forward to seeing Europe like a pilgrim looks forward to finally reaching the site of their pilgrimage (even if it's going to cost me a bomb to do it). As for universities, I studied at the University of Adelaide (wouldn't be surprised if you've never heard of it). It's about the second oldest college in Australia (est. in the late 1800s). As far as I know, it's modelled on a combination of the Oxford and Harvard systems, so I'm sure there'd be some similarities in schools of thought, especially in the Arts. I actually studied science and law, but took up as many humanities courses as I could (including anthropology, ethics, public health, political science and psychology). I've always tended to straddle science and the humanities - it's the way my mind seems to work =) I agree with you on Geertz, although I tended to fall asleep in most of my anthro lectures (we had a really boring, sports-obsessed lecturer who just didn't inspire my interest). As a result, a lot of my recall of first year anthro is fairly hazy (except for that Geertz quote, and the concept of liminality, which I'm still obsessed with). It probably wasn't until I wrote my honours thesis (under the guidance of a cultural anthropologist) that I started to really appreciate what anthropology was all about. Anyway, I hope you and Bear have a great Christmas (with plenty of egg nog, no doubt =)).
from antipodean :
*Blush*. Uh, 'obtuse' must have been a bit of a Freudian slip. I meant something more to the order of pretentious. But come to think of it, maybe obtuse will do. Now, I'd better stop flooding your notes with my insanely wandering thoughts =)
from antipodean :
Well said. I'm often tempted to wonder if things would be different if there was more of an even gender balance in the making and guiding of our societies. But the very nature of our fears and our ideas of power would simply corrupt the best of intentions at the end of the day. We are all slaves to our own ideas. Or (as if I didn't need to sound any more obtuse), "man is suspended in webs of meaning which he himself has spun" (anthropologist Clifford Geertz). Which leaves us with that amusing conclusion: we're always going to be egotistical, hairless apes (albeit with ties and guns ;)).
from arianrhad :
Jesus is over 2,000 years old - hardly a baby - if he can't keep his shit together that's his problem. But I will update soon all the same. (2,000 year old crybaby - how freaking *sad* is that?)
from antipodean :
Shucks, you make me blush =) And I completely agree with you on the wasp-like parallels of our weight obsessed societies. Even in Australia, the culture of thinness is pervasive and particularly brutal for women (although the pressure of ideal beauty is extending to men as well). It's unparalleled in history and by other cultures (being curvy has always been seen as a sign of health - an indicator of being loved and well-cared for, having wealth or 'fertility'). I think a great deal of today's thin obsession comes from a rise in living standards (being weighty today is seen as a sign of poor health, especially when obesity - which was once the reserve of the filthy rich - is now primarily affecting poorer communities, who can't afford, don't have access to, or are not encouraged to eat healthy, fresh food). Hence, the culture has reversed itself - being as thin as possible is now seen as a sign of health and affluence (it takes most people a lot of money to reach those impossible standards of beauty, whereas in the past or in developing countries, being thin comes with being poor and malnourished).
from rixbear :
I agree. You are beautiful. I love you, sweetie.
from antipodean :
Oops. I hope the note I left doesn't sound too corny. I've been a little melodramatic about everything lately.
from antipodean :
I completely understand what you said =) Thank you for your beautiful comment - it really has made my day. I took the entry down this morning because I thought I was being a little too maudlin and unrealistic, but you've helped me to think a little differently about this. I'll keep hoping; keep striving. It's what we social animals must do. I think my main problem is that I've been walking around lately thinking I must be undeserving of the same love everyone else is enjoying. But that couldn't be further from the truth. We all deserve to love and be loved. I just need to be patient, I guess. It's difficult, but as long as I know I'm doing the best I can, there's no way I can have any regrets. [And I like what you said about guys actually ending up more emotionally dependent than us women! So true, when you think about it.]
from rixbear :
No talk of this "Bear" person in your entry, eh? And why not? I always love hearing about this charming, handsome, quietly charismatic new man in your life. P.S. I DO like the picture! As I said, it shall be placed on prominent display on my folder.
from bobbiedylan :
i totally stole your away message today.
from rixbear :
It's called the song you wake up to And it sleeps between your sheets For relief, there's nothing you can do, Just bear the solitude you reap. 'Cause your armor's forged of solitude More heavy than any steel And it matches well your attitude As you strike a lonely deal To take what you can get To never suffer fools Never leave a footprint Never break the rules What a dilemma it is When the heart, iced-over Finds itself A lusty lover! Not my best work, perhaps, but it might make a catchy tune. And, of course, you know who it was inspired by!
from antipodean :
Good to see you back in the land of diaries, I might add :)
from antipodean :
How very, profoundly true.
from rixbear :
And you, my dear. You have made my days bliss, my nights, rapture. I love you. Happy anniversary!
from bobbiedylan :
damn i am so hungry right now i cant wait for thanksgiving and i just finished a pizza, too. go figure. im glad you are back!
from jumblygiant :
just wanted to say hey. hey. hope everything is going okay with you. and with you and the bear.
from antipodean :
*Bows graciously*. Thank you. I don't know if I will, but I'm willing to find out =)
from antipodean :
Thank you, you make me blush. I adore your journal and your words. Keep up the great writing :)
from arianrhad :
It�s true, brothers are awesome things to have. Congrats to your brother for doing so well! Yay for your sister for being so cute! You went to Marin without stopping by my place? You bitch! Eh, I will just have to shanghai you next time... (sounds of evil plotting underway) Bwa-ha-ha!
from rixbear :
Did I ever deny it? Alas, though, there are other reasons to be sad: one of the teachers at PHS died a few days ago; some of my friends are very upset about it. I'm sad, but I didn't know him very well.
from gjurica :
What do you mean by warm, fuzzy things on earth?? Just curious. That quote about the Greeks in one of your entries...it's good. Serendipity has some good stuff in it. You seem very in-touch with things, and describe them well. It seems easy for you to tell us what things are like, as difficult as they may be. AIM: Rook14Jurica
from arianrhad :
Holy shit - you're adorable. Congrats on the new place and the fantastic score on decorations - oh yeah, and on falling head over heels in love too, congrats on that as well. Email me your new address - oh yeah, and I WANT PICS (of the place and of my Livie so happy)! BTW, if it helps, you�ve got more in your checking account than I do right now!
from bobbiedylan :
good entry.
from bobbiedylan :
i dont always understand him when he tries to explain to me how it spread- its not good, but its not super bad either. he seems upset when i bring it up. he is going thru chemo treatments for the second time because it isnt all gone. the hardest thing about it is he has these allergic reactions to the chemo, so he gets painful rashes. hes also exhausted and sick to his stomach and taking steroids. its really rough.
from bobbiedylan :
yea chemo... the nice guy has cancer. but hey, i found you on myspace. you are gorgeous!
from bobbiedylan :
youre so funny
from jumblygiant :
haha, you and the bear are too cute. Congrats on your new place. Email me your address and I'll send you something extremely random to help with the decorating. I love moving into new places as well. Everything is new and optimistic and it feels so wonderful to make it your own home. Well, if nothing else, at least you won't have to wear a smock to work. smock, haha (if my memories of my many trips to Target serve me correctly). Hope you get settled there soon. xoxo
from arianrhad :
Joy for pissing in cups. Just think, some poor schmuck has the job of analyzing your piss - at least you don't have that job!
from shyest :
It must really blow bubbles not having anything to do...just keep on "truckin" and something good will come up. You shouldnt stress about it and enjoy the time you have to chill. good luck -angie p.s. totally sucks that whatever his name is closed the forum site..now I have no where to waste my unvaluable time again...any suggestions??
from rixbear :
Aww... I'm sorry about your nightmare, sweetie, but I'm glad you like your new guitar, and it sounds like this "bear" person is really great and incredibly hot!
from arianrhad :
I know how you feel - it sucks to be jobless. And we're so freaking hire-able! What is the freaking hold up? I'm going slowly insane, but it's nice to know I'm not the only one...
from bobbiedylan :
i agree. we have has conversations about it since. it gets too hard in the end, assuming they will make it anywhere and the way she is- she ONLY wants to make it somewhere with a guy. she doesnt date just for kicks. HOWever, she is also interested in learning about christianity... so who knows. i just hope she doesnt change any of her beliefs because of him.
from arianrhad :
er... more than 48 days now... but it's up! Brand spankin' new and just for you!
from bobbiedylan :
wow. you would love some of my guy friends. they have routines made up to the worst music possible. its a riot!
from jumblygiant :
holy shite! I can't believe you're moving. You sound insanely happy, and I couldn't be more pleased for you. congrats my dear!
from bobbiedylan :
jason- known him since i was five, used to eat plain packets of ketchup for lunch, was my main competition for straight A's and 4.0's in grade school, and has THE worst taste in apartment design. he is a great guy. BUT im not the least bit attracted to him. i dont need to be with a guy who is necessarily gorgeous, but i do have to be attracted to him. i look at jason and think, "ew". is that mean? besides he has: a gf, a daughter, a crazy baby mama who hates me, AND a large following of girl admirers. plus, he is my best friend. :)
from arianrhad :
"[O]ne Patrick with extra spicy sauce." - OMG you two are so freaking cute, it's like you live in a romantic comedy.
from arianrhad :
Holy crap - Pasco? Well, that's awesome! I'm glad you two are hitting it off... er... still. Call me biach, I want details!
from bobbiedylan :
you guys are cute together... and ive never even seen you!
from rixbear :
AH! We've become a cheesy diaryland-couple!
from rixbear :
Yup. Same to you... no running away with choir-girls!
from rixbear :
What a naughty girl you are! Bad!
from bobbiedylan :
noooooo way. very cool. i will get to your email about places to see later since i have to go to work and all. but yea id love to go for a drink and chicago is beautiful...
from bobbiedylan :
noooooo way. very cool. i will get to your email about places to see later since i have to go to work and all. but yea id love to go for a drink and chicago is beautiful...
from jumblygiant :
ohmygoodness. is this a DL love connection or sort of from real life? yay for you and the bear. also, yay for a new laptop. If my apartment caught on fire, the only things I would save are my sammycat and my laptop (which, coincidentally, is the only thing I actually own outright). Maybe you should pick up some random marriage counselor brochures and cards and drop them around your house. With a little note that says "saw this, thought of you guys. love, sunstargirl." Are you and your friend still going on your roadtrip? love ya.
from bobbiedylan :
awww, he sounds wonderful. im so jealous and happy for you... i need to find myself a clever poet guy!
from bobbiedylan :
i love my song on your profile. im in the middle of da vinci code right now because it suddenly occurred to me that im probably the only person i know who hasnt read it yet. as soon as i finish it (and it is taking me forever cuz i have no DAMN time) then i am really anxious to read the author that you recommended. i heart mad people and im pretty mad myself, i think.
from rixbear :
You're so cute.
from bobbiedylan :
you deserve an award for that one. and thanks for the sympathy for tanner. it has been a rough and confusing couple of days, let me tell you.
from bobbiedylan :
thanks. i will definitely look into that author!
from moobiejoe :
Qith regards to your entry about Where is the Love - MY FRIEND DEREK SAID THE EXACT SAME THING YOU DID. I think you even used the same words. And I think I heard the theme from Twilight Zone as I read it. Weird.
from arianrhad :
It was the gods that created age 30? I guess the movie was right... the gods MUST be crazy!
from rixbear :
Genocidal tyrant? Now THAT'S something to put on one's resume! How does one apply for a job like that?
from jumblygiant :
hi. thank you so much for the notes, and i'm sorry my comments suck big hairy donkey dick, because they do. seriously, though, thanks for the kind words. You ARE worth 200 camels - maybe more, depending on the camels. i wish i could witness your wrath on the the car dealership first hand. Why do they have to be so evil, those car guys? have a good week!!
from bobbiedylan :
yea i hung out with d yesterday. all he really is to me is a way to avoid boredom. as long as i tell him and he understands, i dont THINK im doing anything wrong but who the hell knows. blah whatever. as for the insulin thing- its hard. i have no problems with the question and im always happy to explain. alcohol brings your blood sugar up really fast and then can send it crashing down, most likely in the middle of the night which is very dangerous because if im sleeping and i dont wake up- ill go into a coma. this is why my mother is neurotic, understandly so. BUT, i have a dr who is sort of an idiot and THE greatest dietician in the world. what i am supposed to do is eat right before i go out- something substantial, like half a pb sandwich. this way at the end of the night when the sugars from the alcohol are wearing off, my sugar levels are high enough to keep me okay. i also do half the amount of insulin that i think i am going to drink. this is the hard part. its hard to guess what im goign to be drinking and a lot of times i end up having to test my blood sugar and take meds throughout the night. so its hard to do but its something i have to do. and i have some of the most protective friends in the world. the best thing that i can do for myself is eat before i go out, take no insulin for the food, and then drink bacardi and diet pop that night, which is what i am doing more often these days because there are no carbs in regular bacardi. the amount of insulin that i take depends on the amount of carbs that i eat and not the amount of sugars. this is why i can eat candy if i want to. a lot has changed in studies on diabetes. regardless, its still a pain in the ass and its impossible to have perfect sugar levels all the time because they change due to stress, activity level, and physical health as well as food and insulin intake. so i do what i can... wow this is long.
from rixbear :
You want to get married?! Umm... I think we should get to know each other better first. Heh... truthfully, I wouldn't mind getting married someday, but since my parents have made some interesting choices over the years, I would need a lot of time to be sure I was making the right decision.
from rixbear :
Thanks, it was fun... have you noticed how EVERYONE is getting married? I heard that three different friends from high school are getting hitched in August, and it all but sent me into seclusion. According to national statistics (I'm such a nerd, I actually looked it up awhile back), the average guy gets married between 26-27, so I refuse to even THINK about it for another four years. Anyway... yeah. It just struck me as weird and frightening news.
from bobbiedylan :
my cat is huge. and as far as your entry goes- i am seriously (SERIOUSLY) considering writing a book about the guys ive dated and how each relationship worked. and a big part of that book would be about guys liking me more than they ought to only because i am usually apathetic about them. i agreed with everything you said about guys...
from bobbiedylan :
great entry
from bobbiedylan :
i wondered about the mooses/moose grammar as well. turns out that the plural form is moose. ive never seen a moose, let alone 3 moose.
from beatlesfan29 :
I can appreciate your Pink Floyd entry. I'd like to be reincarnated as a Jimmy Page riff =)
from beatlesfan29 :
Ha, yeah they were awesome for going along with it. They kept waiting up for Ed, who was probably the Grandpa. He had a foot that dragged, so I waited up for Ed too! Ha
from rixbear :
:) What can I say? I'm good.
from jumblygiant :
That was an Amazing entry. Amazing with a capital "A."
from rixbear :
Huh... yeah, I knew it was a Postal Service song, but haven't actually HEARD the original. The Iron & Wine version is thoroughly cheesy and romantic, though, and I rather like it. It's on the Garden State soundtrack, which was excellent.
from bobbiedylan :
if you ask me, socks are a turn off in any way whatsoever. you could teach him... or not.
from bobbiedylan :
i wuv your diary... and good luck with your cell phone- that was hilarious. i had a crush on a jesus look-a-like about two years ago. then i talked to him a couple times and it turned out that not only does he look like him, but he was an OVER-enthusiastic christian as well. good luck with yours.
from jumblygiant :
I'm still mortified when my cell rings when I'm in a public (quiet) place - I'll never get over it. Before you know it you won't be able to remember what life was like before you had a cell phone - and THAT is scary. sounds like you're enjoying your summmer so far. What's your road trip destination, if any? xoxo
from rixbear :
About the psych-test, you think you're kidding, but no! There were questions like, "Do you consider yourself a highly motivated person?" Fuck no! I'm a lazy slacker who does the bare MINIMUM necessary to collect a paycheck. But I can't actually SAY that, can I? I checked the box that said, "Strongly Agree." Now I'm a lazy slacker AND a liar. Thank you, Office Depot, for stripping me of my last positive trait, honesty.
from rixbear :
Heh... somebody has a Jesus-fetish!
from bobbiedylan :
yea meds are important. i am leaving for bonnaroo in 30 minutes... im so excited!
from bobbiedylan :
elephants are probably hard to clean up after, too.
from rixbear :
P.S. Heh... I think we should start with the clothes on, though. Builds the suspense ;)
from rixbear :
I suppose that could be arranged. But nothing's free: "a thing for a thing," I believe the saying goes.
from arianrhad :
I'm going to give you a book titled Einstein�s Dreams - It is a series of stories describing his theories on Time. You will like it. Time is weird � like us.
from shyest :
I am a fruit tart with strawberries...I like strawberries...I like guys with strawberries is their hands...what was my point?
from rixbear :
I know. I'm cute, too. ;)
from bobbiedylan :
i know i cant stop! its good to know im not alone.
from rixbear :
Deodorant is a wonderful thing. For instance, two of the largest, fiercest employees at Taco Bell almost got into a physical-altercation when one told the other that he "stunk." For myself, I shower at least once-a-day, and have been known to wear cologne or body-spray (in moderation, of course) upon occasion... a point I couldn't help but flaunt while making jokes about the smelly would-be combatant.
from arianrhad :
Yeah... cold beer and deodorant is awesome... you are so freaking weird - I love it.
from arianrhad :
You wrote that when you were right next to me!!! You are so funny! :D
from moobiejoe :
well I had an epiphany while you were moving (congrats, btw) and have decided that the lockedness must be complete and permanent. now the only one who can read my crazy rambling is... me. sorry :-/
from rixbear :
Yeah... perfect people are hard to find. Aside from myself, I can't think of a single guy I would describe as "perfect."
from genusevil :
chicken?
from beatlesfan29 :
This was my first time playing lax. It was also the first year girls lax was a real sport for the school. The past 3 yrs. it's been more of a club with scrimmages against teams. Next year there will most likely be a jv and varsity. I should take a camp over the summer cuz I have a lot to improve. They're all real pricey, like $200ish and up.
from beatlesfan29 :
I play lacrosse :)
from genusevil :
As do cocks, but I shan�t be putting either into my mouth all the same. You do as you please!
from genusevil :
Mother's Day is horrid. Nude women en mass are brilliant. Bald men who comb their hair over are sad. Clingy people are frustrating. (No need to mug yourself over it.) Friends are lovely things.
from bobbiedylan :
yeah... comb-overs are just wrong.
from arianrhad :
The Senior Champagne Brunch sounds awesome! What a great time!
from genusevil :
My note seems to have an echo...
from genusevil :
It seems your abnormal intelligence has yet to fail you. Thank you for the complements - all three. :)
from genusevil :
It seems your abnormal intelligence has yet to fail you. Thank you for the complements - all three. ?
from arianrhad :
LONG LIVE PERVERTS!
from arianrhad :
lmao - you see right through me!
from beatlesfan29 :
Congrats on graduating!
from genusevil :
You mean your abnormal intelligence can�t help you glean my identity? Congratulations on your graduation. Many happy returns of the day.
from arianrhad :
How exciting! New beginnings! Not being a student - I think I'm jealous. Congrats love, you made it!!!
from rixbear :
You're completely right. I guess it just boils down to laziness: I don't want to haul my guitar around all over campus. Here's a hypothetical: say you're walking down a hallway in-between classes, and a guy you'd talked to a couple times (fairly cute) stops you and starts singing, "You've Lost that Lovin' Feeling" (like Tom Cruise in "Top Gun", only this guy can sing), would you give him your number?
from genusevil :
SIMPILTON! I would laugh but your cognitive elasticity has obviously reached its limit. Let me explain this to you. Read closely, for I shall do this but once. Genus is Latin for type. Genus-evil was referring to my type, what I am. For example, you are Genus-inferior. Understand?
from genusevil :
May it bleed.
from genusevil :
You disgust me.
from genusevil :
Silence! Foul mouthed wench!
from genusevil :
You dare mock me woman?
from bobbiedylan :
well youre entry actually reminded me of the argument i was in on saturday and then it was on my mind so i wrote about it... and it is weird. but we must be on the same menstrual cycle as well, which i had not noticed, and that is just creepy. but not creepy in a bad way.
from arianrhad :
holy shit batman - livie loves me! yay.
from arianrhad :
Good luck with Finals!!!
from rixbear :
Hoses? Blood vessels? Where has YOUR mind been lately?
from bobbiedylan :
i cant tell you the actual dimensions of it, although i did look for a ruler. but it is BIG and it is HEAVY and it is a pain in the ass to take places, which is why its usually at home-home. it started out much smaller and then i had to get a new one. but its also a wonderful collection...
from rixbear :
The great thing about asses is, everyone has one. I'll simply find a nicer one.
from arianrhad :
omg - she's FOUR now??? holy shit. I still think of her as a little baby... Little kids are amazing - they're like living dolls that love you for no other reason than that you love them. And you're love means everything to them. I still can't get over the fact that she's four...
from rixbear :
Aww... lost loves. That's so cute! Alas, I never said I LOVED that girl. I just thought she had a nice ass. ;)
from moobiejoe :
dude, i was just looking at the movies you have as your favorites.. you have damn good taste. AND you like douglas adams! i have new respect for you. :)
from beatlesfan29 :
Thank you, it is an good album indeed. I got into vinyl not too long ago. We have my mom's old record player, and b/t both parent's albums, we have a pretty hefty collection. I've only bought a few for myself, but once summer comes around I look at garage sales. They might be in better shape than in a store when everyone has touched and rejected them =)
from moobiejoe :
ohhh... i forgot. you can get back in. just be like THEFONZ. what's fonzie like? he's cool. you ain't my friend, PALOOKA. pulp fiction is awesome.
from arianrhad :
alas, poor Ornithakyrus - I hardly knew ye.
from arianrhad :
it's not really broken. It just doesn't like short entries. If you look back at some of the earlier ones you'll see that the long ones show up fine and the shorter ones look like the one I posted yesterday. It's a demanding background! lol.
from moobiejoe :
ohh, a roadtrip?! that sounds AWESOME. i've always wanted to go one one. there's so many opportunities for crazy misadventures.
from bobbiedylan :
i will dedicated all of my beers to you when i FINALLY regain my social life on friday.
from silentpoetry :
Just wanted to say sorry about your bong, you can have mine, it's about 1 foot high...errr actually maybe only 10" but it's pink and cute and plastic so it won't break as easily! Hehe have a good day!
from silentpoetry :
I just have a lot of free time on my hands and my poetry shows it...lol. It's sad really. All that free time and instead of doing something productive like sleep or eat my life away I decide to write poetry. Maybe there is hope for this little world after all. Thanks for reading! :D
from shyest :
hmmm...is someone stalking me??? I believe so...anywho I shall be back the forum and do what I do best...which is nothing! lol...I noticed that not many people are online..how odd but I guess its good in a way...ttyl- Angie
from silentpoetry :
Thanks for the note. I've been more inspired lately for unknown reasons. Hey whatever works, I'm not complaining. Most of my poems have nothing to do with me and how I feel...I am happy I am out of my relationship though, so I guess part of that poem is about me but I won't ever go back to him. Thanks for reading! :)
from sampotato :
Thank you for reading my entry and leaving a note. I enjoyed your entry as well. I especially like your comment about the Queen. I think she carries a handbag with a brick in it so she can hit someone who doesn't do exactly what she wants them to do!!!!! (At least that is what I would do!)
from beatlesfan29 :
Likewise* That was bugging me.
from beatlesfan29 :
Thanks for the note! Likewiese ;) Btw, I like you're diary. It's refreshing to read something substantial in a blog.
from arianrhad :
I was thinking along similar lines today. I read an article about an Australian scientist's attempt to build a transporter (like in Star Trek). In his design the first station would scan your body (or whatever you wanted to transport) and disassemble it atom by atom. It would then send the INFORMATION - no the atoms themselves - to the other station, which would then assemble you using it's own store of atoms/biological materials. The question is: Is that person now standing on the second station you? Does it embody your soul? Or is it a copy, like a clone that would have all your memories? Did you die on that first station? It seems to me that the question comes down to if you believe that a person is their "soul" or if a person is the sum of their biological functions - i.e. their body. The body assembled on the second station would be identical to the one disassembled on the first station, so if you believe in the "sum of biological functions" theory, than it is the same person. If you believe in the "soul", than it is not the same person as the soul leaves the body when it dies and by disassembling the body on the first station, you have effectively killed it (remember, the machine would send the information, not the atoms from the body itself). It's an interesting question - all thanks to Star Trek! As far as Queen Elizabeth�s handbag goes� my guess is that she�s a slave to fashion like the rest of us!
from bobbiedylan :
thank you. things just pop out sometimes. and i have to tell you that the only diaries i read EVERYTIME im on are yours, 4by6's, and billybobs. yours is great!
from arianrhad :
lmao! omg - how did I not see that coming? I didn't even think of that. Somehow I don't think you'd win that case though! I mean, I'll bet so far your existence has cost them more than it has cost you!
from arianrhad :
lol - but then who?
from arianrhad :
that's okay - I'm glad you guys talked. It sounds like things are better now, and for that, I'm happy.
from arianrhad :
a refund? from who? you don't believe in God! :)
from arianrhad :
I've never been saluted before. I think I like it. Perhaps I should go into politics or the military... or just dress up like I'm in the military and demand everyone salute me. That would be a lot more fun, really. And in all likelihood - less people would call me crazy!
from arianrhad :
Indeed - you see that's the beauty of making up your own religion. You're right because you say you are, and everyone else is right only if they believe you are, failing that they're wrong because they don't believe you are, but you can't be wrong because you are making the rules, so you're right no matter what, even if your wrong - isn't cyclical logic fun? But if people don�t believe your dogma you can always kill them � they�re heathens, after all. As the Bible has taught me, God loves everyone except the people you kill in his name � but don�t kill anyone because it�s against God�s command and God loves everyone� unless, of course, you piss him off or question him in any way. Now that�s love!
from silentpoetry :
I could be the Pope! Wait...I don't believe in God either..hehe oh wells. I moved in with my boyfriend and his parents...and now we are broken up, it probably would have been ok if it were just us, but I think we make better friends anyways. :)
from bobbiedylan :
great list! "Never move in with a boyfriend if you haven't yet discussed serious things like the number of cats you'd like to own and who's really in charge of the TV remote." this and the one about faking relationships, especially- i love it.
from rixbear :
How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a light-bulb? ... Wanna ride bikes? (It's totally funny, when you hear me tell it in-person)
from silentpoetry :
I laughed at that moaning entry, I have the same problem, though I never had sex in my dorm room, just my ex's parents could hear us sometimes...I'll make sure to keep my window shut if I ever decide to have sex in my dorm room.
from arianrhad :
"Makeup is awesome. It's like an art project every day!" - Sydney 2/9/05
from citiesfall :
Oh geez. You're going to make me e-blush.
from arianrhad :
Lots of entries are good. Your life is not boring. Your entries are therefore not boring either. Besides... I like reading them. So keep it up!
from bobbiedylan :
i dont think your diary is at all boring.
from bobbiedylan :
well i think im not anymore, it was fleeting, like ALWAYS. just some boy.
from rixbear :
That's truly terrible. ;)
from rixbear :
Okay. Your email address is [email protected], correct? I shall email you a new password (this one I know works, 'cause it's mine).
from arianrhad :
I know the feeling... I've got five papers to write by Friday. I only have four classes this semester - WTF? Love the fiction, by the way. Such lovely description! You used the character interactions well too - every meeting was a step forward in character development - very nice!
from bobbiedylan :
i really hope things stop sucking for you. i hate hairy goat balls, or whatever funny thing you said. it made me laugh.
from arianrhad :
Sounds like someone had an interesting night... asprin?
from bobbiedylan :
yeah i asked a couple of friends the question, outside of dland and i either get weird looks or the same answer. gotta love useful information.
from arianrhad :
Yeah those guys are too cute. Devon and the Parentals will be up next weekend to look at houses for me and the boy to live in come Fall. I can't wait to have him up here - it should be a blast. He called today and we talked for two hours. It's so weird, he's not much of a phone guy, but we talk for hours without even noticing!
from moobiejoe :
The world is full of BITCHES and HOES. Oh, and I'll be expecting your urine sample shortly. : P
from citiesfall :
Thank you.
from arianrhad :
thanks - I have fun with my quotes
from moobiejoe :
Hey, I read some of your entries and you seem pretty cool. Let me know if you want my password or anything.
from rixbear :
I can't get it unlocked... I've emailed diaryland-people about it; hopefully they'll get back to me. In the meantime, I'll send you (and anyone else who wants one) a password tonight. Unfortunately, I haven't had much time to update lately, but quite a lot has happened.
from arianrhad :
Thanks!
from moobiejoe :
uh... thank you?
from arianrhad :
OMG - has everyone seen Sin City except me?? Sydney went with a bunch of her theater peoples during a "production meeting" - how do I get invited to this kind of meeting? All the meetings I go to are dull as hell. I would drag Kacy, but he has decided that he hates movies that are filmed in front of green screens... er... Kacy? I hate to tell you this, but most movies have at least one green screen scene in them nowadays. Does he plan on giving up movies all together? I'll keep working on him - I'm sure I can wear him down! I'm glad you and Alex are working it out. Good luck with the diet too!
from arianrhad :
I know - the spelling of dyslexia really is a cruel joke, isn't it? I'm glad you and Laura had a good time (overall). Esther sounds like a fantastic friend (have I met her yet?), and Laura sounds like a sweetie. That's fantastic she can put herself out there despite what must often feel like a confusing and hostile world. She sounds like a very sweet, brave girl, (like her cousin/second cousin) someone worth knowing! I'm sorry about Alex... that is disappointing.
from arianrhad :
A roomy shoe box eh? How's the rent?
from arianrhad :
LMFAO!! - So he tells you how he loves how comfotable he feels around you, and you tell him you love how pretty he is!! I love it!
from arianrhad :
Sydney and Kacy are fine now. Mom wasn't shocked - she actually knew what I was up to in Hawaii before we talked about it over the phone. She just wasn't sure if that's when I lost my virginity or if I had done it earlier with Jim (now that's a laugh!).
from arianrhad :
Okay babe. I updated today, just for you. In fact, there are 7 new entries - JUST FOR YOU! (Careful what you wish for!)
from rixbear :
I have another site which I'll email you (it has too much personal information for me to post on diaryland). Let's just say there are some people I don't want knowing everything about me who've been reading my diaryland-journal lately.
from arianrhad :
What a great weekend! That's awesome Livie - have fun with your new boy!
from arianrhad :
I'm sorry you feel that way. If you don't recognize our cultural heritage, perhaps that's why you feel we have none.
from arianrhad :
But America does have cultural stories and songs. We have our country�s mythos, just like any other nation. Ours are newer, to be sure, but still present. Johnny Appleseed, Paul Bunion, Babe the Blue Ox, Washington crossing the Delaware, Franklin and his kite, The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere, Tom and Huck Fin, The Star Spangled Banner, The Big Rock Candy Mountain, Yankee Doodle, and so forth. They are a reflection of our culture and it's underlying values just as other nations' myths are of theirs.
from arianrhad :
Oh man livie... I just felt so sick reading what happened to your art. How could this happen?! I'm so sorry love. This is truly shit.
from rixbear :
P.S. Re-reading your entry before last, it reminded me of a tip I read, one which I hope to make use of (PLEASE GOD MAKE IT SOON!): when a girl's "down there", a guy still has the use of his hands. With little to no effort, he could give her a rather nice massage. This hopefully alleviates the urge to put his hands on her head (no good has ever come of it, I think), and will probably cause her to relax and do a better job.
from rixbear :
I'd like to think (since I'm one of them) that not ALL college-guys are immature. The funny thing about guys is that we can tell when another guy is a jerk or not, so we don't get blind-sided. I used to try to warn my female-friends when they were getting involved with an asshole... funny thing, though: it seemed to make the other guy that much more irresistable. So I learned a lesson: be the guy other guys warn girls about! ...It's still a work in-progress, but I've made a few strides.
from arianrhad :
Your randomness provides me with amusement - and thus you have a purpose in life (and a valuable one at that) - so thank you! Exist on!
from rixbear :
Have you heard of, "The Guide to Getting It On"? My last ex and I both read it, and... yeah. Definitely worth reading. And buying. And re-reading. (New Thought) I've noticed something about myself, and wonder if it could be true for other guys as well: I'm "better" in all areas of a relationship (sex, romance, et cetera) if I really feel strongly for a woman. Sex in a relationship is almost ALWAYS better than casual things. So that's my advice: if you're horny, find a boyfriend, get him "The Guide", and... yeah. Rock on!
from bobbiedylan :
you should send that entry to every guy you know.
from arianrhad :
Thank you! I am such a complement whore! :) (Sorry I didn't get the joke - I get it now... I read it after I spoke to you over aim while you were in the midst of revelry. I thought perhaps it was in response to something John had said to you at the same point in time - I didn't even connect it to his limbo note! Clever joke - what a shame it was wasted on us!)
from arianrhad :
uh... did you mean to leave that note for me?
from arianrhad :
I'm glad you and the pseudo-hubby are doing well. I do so hate it when couples fight! (Love your description of safari girl, by the way!)
from bobbiedylan :
it would be a first time for me! he played at the bonaroo fest last year so i keep hoping that MAYBE hell be there again since they keep adding bands to it- who knows? im keeping my fingers crossed, but if not, i will see him the next time he comes around!!!
from arianrhad :
He's a big boy; he'll be okay. So will you, for that matter.
from bobbiedylan :
thats a great entry! i twisted my ankle jumping off a fort with an umbrella... ah memories!
from arianrhad :
I'll get the Guinness, and then we'll make a fort with our desk chairs and blankets. Forget genocide, disease, and republicans. Taxes can wait 'till April. There is definitely something living in the storm drain; we can pretend it's four overgrown turtles named after renaissance men and a rat that knows karate. We are princesses, boys are clueless - I guess some things never do change. Someday we may have children and see the world anew through their eyes. Until then, we are still children at heart, just overgrown and experienced. I wouldn't want to be a child again, but I do love to act the part from time to time. Join me sometime?
from arianrhad :
There are theories that man was a briefly a semi-aquatic creature - hence the loss of body hair and the streamlined body (ever notice how some people are born with webbed fingers/toes?) and how menses stops in the shower and pool. -- In terms of your new phase of destructive art, I'd be interested to know what brought it about. It seems so... unlike you. But then, I haven�t really been around.
from arianrhad :
No need to borrow a friend's phone. I got the pseudo-mom on it. I talk to Sierra's mom, Kyle, over aim so I got her to inform the mother that I was destitute and starved for parental attention. That did the trick. Got an email with loads of apologies and promises for cash today. Everyone needs a pseudo-mom.
from rixbear :
Thanks... or something... heh... (break) I'll confess, I don't think much about the planet's future or the continued survival of mankind. I figure, if it all blows up tomorrow, there's nothing I can do to prevent it. So why worry? Have a good one!
from arianrhad :
Naw, not so strange. I think about that stuff too. But don't worry about the world changing beyond recognition... in a few billion years, our sun will turn into a red giant and swallow up all the planets to Mars. Makes you feel all warm and toasty inside, doesn't it? At any rate, if we survive, it will be our ability to manipulate our environment that will save us (ya know, space travel). The real question is... where will we go? Just imagine � billions of years from now we may have ancestors living in Alfa Centuri who have no memory of Earth and what life was like here. They may wonder where they came from, what they�re doing here, and what their lives mean. Something really trippy � what if that�s already happened? One huge cycle of advanced civilization, immigration, destruction, assimilation to new surroundings, cultural amnesia, cultural advancement, and finally immigration again� yeah� that�s some of the weird shit I think about.
from arianrhad :
indeed Loki - you have brought chaos into my world. well done.
from arianrhad :
OMG
from arianrhad :
You
from arianrhad :
are
from arianrhad :
insane
from arianrhad :
but
from arianrhad :
I
from arianrhad :
love
from arianrhad :
you
from arianrhad :
all
from arianrhad :
the
from arianrhad :
same,
from arianrhad :
WHORE
from arianrhad :
yeah... you really need to get some sleep girl... but I must say, you're fucking funny when you're sleep deprived and hyped on meds!
from rixbear :
Heh... Carmen Electra's okay, but I'd rather have Kate Hudson... and Natalie Portman... AT THE SAME TIME!!!
from arianrhad :
Hey missy - I DO sign your guest book! Or... I leave notes at least... does that count for nothing? Fine! I'll go whore up your guest book! Bwa-ha-ha!!! (oh, and I do think Geck's cute... just kinda weirded out by my new found bald fetish... interesting to say the least - kind of out of left field, don't you think?)
from arianrhad :
being sick sucks - feel better soon!
from rixbear :
Yeah... I guess I want a girl who values kindness more than cool. No offense if you count yourself among them, but the type of girl who like the "bad boys" isn't my type. I like a girl who takes relationships and sexuality a bit more seriously. Most of the people I know treat sex like it's some sort of game, which is why both birth and divorce-rates are so high. Heh... I have lots of ideals and no one who really agrees with me. Still, I'm too stubborn to admit I'm wrong.
from rixbear :
Happy Birthday!
from arianrhad :
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIVIE!!!!!
from rixbear :
Eww...
from arianrhad :
I owe you big - love you!
from lastboss :
be nice.
from rixbear :
'Tis done! Thank God! It was fun being up in-front of hundreds of people, singing them a song about heart-break and disapointment, but... yeah. In addition to performing, my choir (I can call them MY choir, now, I think; I feel I've been accepted and acknowledged, which is bliss) listened to at least seven hours of instrumental/choral jazz over the course of the day. I'll be glad to focus on something more... well, tangible, for the next few days. Anyway, thanks for the note! Have a good one!
from rixbear :
Heh... thanks! I actually do have it copywritten. Some of my poems are on http://www.poetry.com. I shall email you my full name, if you want to read them... though I think most of those I sent to Poetry.com started out on diaryland, so... yeah. I like your poems, too! Especially the one about Bob Dylan; his writing was the inspiration for "White Dove" (one of my poems). Anyway, thanks again!
from arianrhad :
Love the poetry babe - keep writing!
from rixbear :
Yo! Welcome back!
from arianrhad :
Happy New Year!!!
from arianrhad :
Ah, to be young and in love! Well, at least I've got one down. Have fun dearie - of course, I don't need to tell you that!
from rixbear :
P.S. You're nice for saying that. Even if there weren't a romantic interest, it'd be nice... ah well, you're probably right. I hope you meet someone truly worthy of you, too.
from rixbear :
Heh... thanks! As far as I'm concerned, black slacks are always a good decision for girls; they're slimming, sexy, (grin) and not hard to remove, either!
from arianrhad :
ooh, it's like a little secret forum about Livie... what fun!
from rixbear :
Of course, how ever many I list off, there are always more I forget... Otis Redding, for instance.
from rixbear :
I may have a point, but don't rule out the possibility that I actually AM an asshole!
from rixbear :
I guess the best part was when it went from sixty to zero in less than a second, and I had to try to pull off the road in a blaze of smoky glory.
from rixbear :
Happy Thanksgiving!
from rixbear :
Heh... that last comment was about the "join 'em" idea. As for Mikerlira trying to kill me, the story goes something like this: he and I spent a few weeks last summer working on a farm, bucking hay. On one of our last days, we had finished stacking a tractor-load of bales (badly stacking, I should say), and Mikerlira was driving the tractor-trailer back to the barn with me on-top of the stack. He accidentally put one of the wheels into a swampy ditch, and the bales began to fall off. I scrambled like mad and managed to stay on the tractor, but it was a near thing. He stopped it, got out, and burst into laughter. I was mad at first, then I joined in. So there we were, standing in a swampy ditch, surrounded by ruined hay-bales, laughing our asses off. It was quite a scene!
from rixbear :
Ha ha ha... crack kills!
from bufonid :
deine addressen, bitte!
from rixbear :
Why do I think I'm not the only one with a hangover today?
from rixbear :
Heh... yeah. I need to get a life. Alas, I'm not in-school fulltime right now, so I have too much free time on my hands. The good part: I get to sleep in, and I hardly ever miss an episode of "That 70's Show."
from bufonid :
please give me your address and postal code
from rixbear :
Hmm... I'll confess, I don't know much about IM. I have MSN messenger, but it won't let me add you. Do you have a hotmail account?
from rixbear :
I'm going to community college at the moment, but plan to transfer to Washington State University or maybe University of Idaho in a year or so... I like that area. Where do you go?
from drunkston :
hey, cheers for the compliments! i only wish my tastes had the breadth that yours do.
from rixbear :
Fall break? I want a break, too! Do you think anyone'd notice if I just quit showing up to work and school for a week?
from rixbear :
Just kidding!
from rixbear :
Can I have that girl's number?
from rixbear :
Eh... I think I could do without despair, personally.
from sunstargirl :
you know peoples, I do have a guestbook... but if you like this more secret area better, by all means, message away!
from rixbear :
It's okay, honest! It's cute how upset you seemed in that last note, though. I'm glad you liked the poem, and I agree with you: it needs a point. When I figure something out it will be a finished poem, hopefully worth entering in an online poetry contest or something.
from rixbear :
(sings it to himself) Hmm... it doesn't really fit rhythmically, either.
from rixbear :
It actually fits with the verse-melody to "Across the Universe." I tend to write poems while listening to music, and then come up with different melodies for them... (shrug) I can't seem to find another melody that fits with that one, though.
from rixbear :
Hmm... I don't think ALL mysterious-seeming musicians are bad, but if he hurts her, beat him up. Don't hurt the guitar, though; you might want to keep it for yourself.
from bobbiedylan :
thanks. so do you & i like what you had to say about music in some of the entries i read.
from rixbear :
I JUST finished playing that song on my guitar before I came to veg in front of the magic screen!
from rixbear :
I agree, I think we're very similar. It's comforting (though a bit frightening) to think there are other people like me out there. Anyway, have a good one!
from lastboss :
my aim screenname is maxgleeson. IM me sometime.
from lastboss :
you are my savior. but who are you?
from rixbear :
I like what you have to say, as well as your excellent choices in music. Thanks!

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