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Haha. But seriously, I do want to read it very badly. Now probably even more so than before, when I didn't know I couldn't? Oh, the tantilizing forbidden...

from pixiia-8 :

sigh. BUT I WANT TO READ IT!!!

from pixiia-8 :

heya :). I'm back at diaryland...what's your password? Leave it in my guestbook, just don't write your name or anything else, k? then I'll erase it immediately. I miss you!

from mathyou :

What is this monstrosity? My password doesn't work and you're on strike or something? You're the worst twin ever. Worse than my actual beard-cultivating, bible-thumping, sandal-wearing, david gray-listening twin brother.

from loudlikefuck :

my password i had no longer works! i miss you and i dont even know you!

from anticrew :

hahhahhaaa...i'm stoned right NOW!!! aaaahahhahaaha

from jerrbear :

oh won't you email / me your password in case you / post again someday?

from ihatepizza :

Where the hell are you going?

from golddustgrrl :

heyyy - no gawking if I don't have your password! ;)

from ihatepizza :

Sankyu!

from ihatepizza :

Can I have the password again?

from mechanica :

Um. So i've been meaning to ask you for a password for like.... months. breakfastketchup.at.hotmail.com pleeeeeease.

from anticrew :

and signing and it never stops. it's like i'm addicted or something.

from anticrew :

also. i like the commentary you leave. there's one in particular in my gay journal that i read and over and over again by you. i feel that since you lived in new york--and that makes you my geographical neighbour--you're allowed to say whatever you want to me. i also like leaving notes here because i can keep signing and signing

from anticrew :

i keep imagining that if "IT'S" drano "IT" will sound like dran-o but i think it's spelled american so i'm probably wrong....you like my spelling fuck-ups? awesome!

from anticrew :

is it "draino" or is it "drano"? i keep imagining that if drano is will sound like dran-o but i think it's spelled american so i'm probably wrong. you can make all the commentary you want on my life, melanie. but i'll probably run to the nearest pillow crying about how no one understands how complicated and sad i am because i'm so fucking special...yeah, yeah i need a bright yellow helmet and a short bus, apparently.

from ummhi :

YOU LOCKED YOUR DIARY!:( It sucks when people do that. It takes the fun out of it.

from design-doll :

i'm feeling strangely better melanie... i'll email you the "secret" if you'd like... it's just the usual tirade of messed up boy situations... xxoo kristin (make me a new cd make me a new cd! i wanna know what you sf kids are listening to) kiss.

from towelphaser :

no passwords anymore?

from dutch-girl :

Hi - I've been reading you for a while and would love to have your password if you feel so inclined. [email protected] ;-)

from loudlikefuck :

been away from d-land for awhile. then, came back to the horrible realization that i could not read yr diary. bah! i would love a password.

from design-doll :

[email protected] [heart you girl.]

from ezi :

I wasn't granted a password. *kicks dirt*

from bettinas :

May I have your password, lovely one? eswiggerATcoloradocollege.edu

from xo-liesl :

um, can i have a password? I forgot to email you about it earlier and I HATES it. [email protected], of course.

from design-doll :

i want it ... baaad. of course of course. xo

from brandnewglow :

[email protected] i understand the need for a password...

from occipitalobe :

IM me with it. redcassette. Thanks, dude.

from sinnergi :

[email protected] :) love to keep reading.

from ihatepizza :

Dude! I wear ugly undies too! And I wore em way before I even met my old man!

from test-rat :

i have a suggestion 2 your problems with phone-operators aka dummies! when they call u say, "hold on, i need 2 go 2 the bathroom." (or some excuse) and because they can't hang up, because they r operated by a computor, when u don't hang up, they can't do anything about it. it may not stop em' from comin' back, but it sure pisses them off and makes u feel good. a thing u can say 2 them b4 u finally hang up is, "h8ing u makes me feel all warm inside!" -from the happy bunny. hope that all works 4 u ♥ test-rat

from dumb-john :

you're not dead too! WE MUST START A CLUB.

from design-doll :

... i sent it off on friday... hehehehe eek! i heart melanie! BIG FAN BIG FAN xx

from equivocalady :

i know for a fact that your costume is the cutest of them all.

from design-doll :

i made your cover today... it's electric pink and wild BLUE... i'll scan it so you can have a peek before it's send to you ms. melanie... watch out. x

from anticrew :

the guestbooks are broken. bleh. dear melanie, i'm not sure if i told you how ridiculously cute you are. i sometimes hesitate giving girls compliments because it's just never a good idea. but yeah, ridiculously cute. even BEFORE the bumble-bee costume. i'm sorry i couldn't come out and get crunk, er, i mean drunk, nah, i mean crunk with you on friday. i had a date with a toilet. you are jealous of me. yup. cause that's what i do, make girls jealous. today is october 28th and it's 12.38pm EST and i should be sleeping but i'm on california time. sucks. say hi to anne and brian and mike. love, rhonda

from ihatepizza :

You're so fucking honest. I envy you.

from stare--girl :

Dont even think that your story has no affect on us. I can only speak for myself but hearing about what happened to you makes me even more of a hater than I was before. It's ludicris what young girls are subjected to in this country and it's ludicris how our parents aren't our support and protection when they should be. I'm really sorry that you have to live with that pain Melanie.

from towelphaser :

that was the most frightening thing i've ever heard.

from golddustgrrl :

Thx for the BK lowdown. They're billing that thing as a 'healthy alternative' and yet it probably packs the caloric punch of an eleven-decker Royale with Cheese. Well, these blind eyes don't wanna know.

from golddustgrrl :

Is the BK chicken ceasar sandwich thing good??

from ihatepizza :

Why did he make you cry??

from xo-liesl :

Try Benefit. They're amazing. They do services at the Berkeley store, so I'd imagine they do at the SF store too. If they don't, they should at least be able to reccommend a decent place for you. Just be careful about where you go. It should be clean, first of all. Appointments are good ideas, but sometimes you can get away with a walk-in if they're not too busy. Be sure to be honest about it being your first time so they can explain your options to you and they'll be extra gentle. If you happen to be in the east bay I go to About Face and Body on College and Alcatraz in Oakland. They're great and I can almost always get a walk in. Dao is my favorite esthitician there. Or you can go to Benefit on 4th street in Berkeley. They're great too. I go to them for my eyebrows and would go for my snatch too if I didn't feel so weird about letting women I trust with my face and makeup see the disaster I call my nethers. I don't remember what else you asked...sorry it took so long to reply, but Diaryland decided to take a nap when I wanted to post this yesteday. Let me know if you have any other questions!! I'm soooo pro wax!

from xo-liesl :

I have to tell you about it here because I can't sign your freaking guestbook again....so here goes. Yes, technically you could wax that shit yourself, but its soooo much harder and more painful and messier than just having it done for you. Its not that painful an experience overall. It depends on what you want ripped out. I get mine done every three weeks to a month or so (imagine being hairless for that long!!) and I get my shit shaped into a landing strip, so the sides are taken in towards the middle and the top is lowered. I wear my underwear the whole time, which they use as a sort of a guide, you know moving it around and stuff, but I'm never like, hanging out there. And you lay on your back the whole time. No weird contortions. It takes about 10 minutes and the pain, if any, is when it happens, not after and its not like PAIN but like, ouch. And its lessened if you breathe. I don't mind it at all. I'm trying to work my way up to The Brazillian. But I'm scared. If you meet God first, please ask him why he put hair around our assholes. Thanks. I'll tell you more if you have more questions. I'm just taking up your entire notes section. Go do it Melanie! Have hot wax put on your vagina!!!

from ihatepizza :

Dude, that pizza bomber shit totally fucked me up. I'm traumatized. I can't believe that dude guy's last moments were shown on fucking t.v. for everyone to wonder over. I couldn't handle the look on the guy's face before the bomb went off. Fuck.

from dutch-girl :

that's too bad!!

from earthlinger :

I went to the same Belle & Sebastian show.

from bettinas :

Dude, you're gonna be on vacation while I'm on vacation? COPYCAT! But still, that's hottt.

from mychoice :

I'm so sorry about the loss of the ring. Do look very hard for it, even run the vacuum if you have to and go through the bag for it. You will always regret this loss, and I feel for you. And you don't always have to be funny. We all have bad times. Hope you find it.

from anticrew :

BECAUSE YOU KNOW I CAN"T SIGN YR GUESTBOOK AGAIN -- Dear Easy-M: No, I'm not sending EVERYone underwear. I hafta send something pretty to Jodie for doing my layout and since I was on an underwear buying frenzy, I thought Why the fuck not. If Becky is so excited about getting Canadian underwear tell her to mail me her address already because I fuh reals have her package ready. And no, I ain't sending you more knickers. I wanna send you a Happy CD mix--you seem real blue, and I wanted to help give you something that would make you smile....although, I didn't know that nudie photos of me and the H-man would do it for you. Love, Rhonda

from design-doll :

http://design-doll.diaryland.com/images/disuisedinvite.gif, yes it's tomorrow nite :) :) if you have nothing to do, come and dance all nite, you can either sleep on my couchy (if i had a bigger than twin bed i'd offer that!) or i could hook you up at another friend of my house :) it's like 45 minutes... not too bad!

from anticrew :

FUCKING GUESTBOOKS AND THEIR NOT LETTING ME SIGN CRAP! Blah=Rhonda, OK?

from dumb-john :

that's odd about shaved legs. i started writing about how my last gf did the same thing, but got all elaborate, so... what i'm saying is that i had never really noticed, not until you pointed that out.

from nikatron :

mmm :( melanie, i'm really sorry about the break up... and the 52 and the lame broke roommate. everything happens in threes... but on a lighter note, i got suckered into friendster about a month ago!!! i don't understand it at ALL? will you explain how you're supposed to use it?

from bettinas :

I can't access your guestbook, but I had to tell you...I'm really sorry, but it sounds like you are doing the mature thing. And you never know what might happen. Love is a pretty cool thing; it just sucks that it's so hard. If we knew what each other looked like and lived in the same town, I'd run up to you in the street and give you a hug. It might scare you, but then you'd realize the sentiment was there all along.

from ihatepizza :

Man, that sucks that you guys broke up! I'm so sorry! I admire you for doing what had to be done. I could learn a thing or two from you!

from anticrew :

huh? there were vampire and pumpkin erasers. you should've both gotten a pack each. you tell becky to share!

from anticrew :

Why did you change the entry, Melanie? It wasn't "cliche" at all.

from nikatron :

hi hi hi. all of a sudden i was overcome with the urge to write you a note. i have nothing to say except hi and congratulations on your top 100. your life is cool. :)

from stare--girl :

"I want to be a writer and write books with poems in it" I'm still reeling from Sk8ter Dyke.

from equivocalady :

ah shit you're awesome. just spectacular. i can't even tell you. i have had so many weird experiences at the health clinic... thank you for sharing your gyno mishaps and making me laugh cuz i needed it.

from anticrew :

i have been meaning to tell you for FORever that i am in love with the little black dude in your diary--you know, the one wearing the sunglasses with his mouth slightly open and some white lady groping his goods. you think you can hook it up, girl?

from stare--girl :

Alright lovely, we�ve got a grand total of nine, count �em nine people who would like to exchange music. I find this very stimulating. If all works out properly you should create your mix and make eight copies of it, send those to the addresses I will provide and soon receive eight different mix�s. Claire, EQ, and Bettina don�t have access to CD burners so they will be making tapes. If you still want to take part send me an E-mail with your address or P.O. Box # and I�ll get them out to everyone. I�m thinking this trial run doesn�t really need a theme but if you want to make a �make out mix� in honor of Claire�s recent booty call I think it would rock. My email is [email protected] (but I think you already sent me your address)

from stare--girl :

yo I just had a fight with your guestbook and it won. I typed what was possibly the best geustbook entry ever and the bitch ate it and it hates me and I'm sad but do you wanna trade CD's?

from xo-liesl :

I can't sign your goddamn guestbook any more often than like, once every 4 hours and I had more to say to you. First of all, "Reed" played me "I want you" by Elvis Costello last night and I almost shot myself in the face it was so good and so sad. And Second, I think its appropriate that your favorite books are picture books. That is all.

from dumb-john :

hola pendero! hi, it's jonathan, and i am on my third day of drink-bingin' and whorin' and gamblin' and riding fast bicycles. just saying 'hi' and inviting you out to binge-drink and whore and gamble and ride fast bicycles. xoxo, Myles na mGapoleen

from jaxzimmy :

I am really sorry about your dog...i read your diary, and felt bad at the thought of not telling you that i am sorry. Im sure he/she had a great life tho. jax

from bettinas :

I can't stop having nightmares either! Stupid subconsciousnesses (subconsciousni?). You should totally auction off the hair you're losing. You'd get millions.

from dumb-john :

hi Golden Gate Bridge! The last time I drove across your head, I was on acid and was convinced I was going to die. Did you even notice? Maybe this would jog your memory -- I was the one driving from Marin, on acid. I love you and thank you for the nice pictures and have a swell day.

from xo-liesl :

I love it when Diaryland lies and says you updated last 12045 days ago. Which is exactly what my buddylist says right now. It sort of feels like that long. Melanie, I miss your ass!

from shawster :

"If you say run, I'll run with you If you say hide, we'll hide Because my love for you Would break my heart in two If you should fall Into my arms And tremble like a flower"-david bowie

from anticrew :

you know, i've googled my new diary's name and i haven't found it! i think andrew put some new filter on or some junk. i think i will be brave enough to start using my REAL name from here on in!

from dumb-john :

re saying shit about people + using last names: yo, did you know google caches everything? and that like you can totally find like old entries and shit, even if they're already changed? now how's that for stuff?

from anticrew :

ohmigod, melanie! if i was 4 and you were 4, i would, like, totally wanna be your best friend. especially if you wore that bathing suit to school.

from supernigger :

if you could rate your ass on a scale of one to ugly, what would it be?..

from nikatron :

sooo... A.) I wrote a paper on the Choco Taco when i was freshman in High School and I got an A on it. B.) Hang in there. Baby. Sigh. Gush. I hope you update soon. And that your apartment stops closing in and becomes better. C.) If I'm in San Francisco can we go shopping together?

from rhoeng :

baby...don't let them break you down. you tell them all if they make you sad, i will break their legs and then beat them with the bloody stump. okay? now feel better, babe.

from dumb-john :

good luck. whoops, i'm late. what's the past tense of "good luck"?

from dumb-john :

your vibrators are named Billy Loudermilk and Norman Rockwell too!? now how weird is _that_? p.s. fuck self-pity. your writing kicks ass as always. welcomefastback

from andross :

Highest congrats and best regards on your sighting of Robin Williams. Also, David Sedaris, Dahl, Lebowski, Story-Telling, Saved by the Bell and Tenenbaums... this is an obvious recepie (recipie?) for greatness. I was raised to eventually love all of the same things. Most appropriate in this list is the Tenenbaums, which is a concoction of childhood memories in itself (The Mixed Up Files of Basil E. Frankwiler, Hey Jude, etc) molded into a beautiful story... but you already know that. It is listed as one of your "likes." Anyhow, I am just stopping by as I am hopping from one San Franciscian diary to another, trying to get a taste of what my move is going to be like. I am flying out there in a week and I'm personality browsing at the moment. Keen, Andross Chase

from dumb-john :

oh, and p.s. i forgive you. thank you for your apology. sorry i'm such a whiner. let's kiss and make up.

from dumb-john :

i think i'm getting strep as well. or maybe it's just my overwhelming desire to be popular making itself perversely manifest. let's have a suicide pact, let's.

from dumb-john :

why do you and danica have strep at the same time? is it what all the cool kids are doing these days, or is it something more sinister and sapphic? still alive, sorry.

from rhoeng :

whoa. american bitches are hot sluts. cool.

from rhoeng :

you say the sweetest things, sometimes...

from rhoeng :

fuck... my intonation and sarcasm are getting fuct up via this internet. so let me say this real simple and shit: i like every comment you'd had for so far. i like giving pigs a bad name. i like canadians being synonymous with golden showers. me laughy-laugh because you funny-fun....if i say this anymore plainly i just might start drooling from the mouth, uglykatey.

from rhoeng :

take it back! take it ALL back, uglykatey! you see, canada NEEDS this sort of salacious reputation lest we be forever known as beer guzzling, hockey-playing, flannel wearers. i'd rather be a golden shower-giving miscreant, muthafukkah!

from rhoeng :

canadians are "fucking sickos"? This from a girl who eats pudding and rolls around in her own farts...fucking sweet, yah....

from pink-banana :

I am one of those kids who saves their wild cards for end of the Uno game. But I also think there should be a "FUCK YOU" card. That way when you get up a bunch of non-number cards you can go on a long rant... "Reverse, reverse, skip you, take two, skip you, reverse, take two... FUCK YOU!" but that isn't of importance. What is, I'm not sure. But it'll get around, one of these days. Uh. I shouldn't sign these notes. Right.

from rhoeng :

gee, uglykatey, what a fantastic comment. but you know, they used to call me "ass-flasher" for most of grade 11. but i like your comment waaaay better.

from nikatron :

melaniemelaniemelanie.... i just did a marathon of catching up on your diary and it wasn't until i finished and wanted more that i realized how much i've missed you/it! that's really all, i guess. xoxo danica

from manslaughter :

Fuck, you have all of my sympathy, and love - as much as I can give over some internet cables from far away in another country. I hope you get better and you ace your test, and everything turns out good and you end up healthy and happier and smarter after it's all over and done with. Seriously. Get well soon.

from manslaughter :

um, every boy in the world loves knee high boots.

from pixiia-8 :

hey :)

from sfreject :

i like reading your rantings on life. judging just from your diary, you seem like a happy productive person. or maybe that is just because my poor tortured mind can't judge things like that accurately. either way, i like reading you.

from plastic8tree :

your words made me think,thankyou.

from bettinas :

hi melanie. A good friend of mine is moving to the SF area, and she's looking for a place to live. She and her boyfriend want to live together in an apartment without roommates. I know you just did the house search and I was wondering if you could give me any leads to give her. thanks. happy valentines to you too.

from bleedsapathy :

wesley played here. and of course i missed it again. i will never see that man. i still have the autographed picture of him. he's my lovahhh

from bleedsapathy :

bleeding heart day wishes for melba!

from bleedsapathy :

hah. i always look at the seats at the ghetto theatre to see if my name im magic marker is still there. woop! last st. pattys day me and my roomates went to rent lep5.. but it was out..so we got 3 and 4. good times were had. and i have the collectors edition dvd of repoman that comes with the cd soundtrack. damn i love that movie. "i was into these dudes before anyone... they asked me to be their manager... called BULLSHIT on that." that guy rocks!

from bleedsapathy :

wooot. its melba. hah. member the time we watched pink flamingos, garbage pail kids: the movie, &leprechaun 4.... oh dizzam that was some A+ material. i stil havent seen that damn Leprechaun in the Hood yet... booo hisssssssss ~mikeeey

from be-zen :

I am loving your thoughts on what foriegners are saying to you when you are telling them the price. Marvellous stuff.

from nikatron :

great. very glad to hear it. ( i wonder how long ago you left this note. ) anyway, yes... i love your diary. it's always entertaining.

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