Cafe Hitch-hike

2024-03-13

Wish / Dreams of birth

Sometimes when I make wishes, they do come true. I've seen it many times, and it happened more with time.

When I was about 26, I described my ideal place to live. It wasn't lost on me that I'm pretty much living there now. Gee, maybe I stayed as long as I've had for that reason. My old beau was next to me when I heard it. I whisper over the time and space, "hey Dan, look! I did it! How cool is that?" I'm glad to say he found his happy place (opposite of mine) and is married and a loving stepfather to 3 children.

I secretly wished for something work-related back in 2018 or 2019, and lo and behold, we got together. I am enjoying my work with them although it IS a lot of work. They are lovely and I'm trying to get used to being able to freely laugh with smart, motivated colleagues. It's so much better than that damn cage I realized I was stuffed into for quite some time.

I wished to meet someone like Huck, and I did, even down to the look and confidently nerdy swagger. I'll wish for that again, except to be 100% available and nondeceptive. But, I embrace the spirit of all that was between us that remains.

I wished to find a condo owned by some wealthy South American who didn't really care about the money, and I kinda got that wish (I'm still laughing).

I wished for something else, and it seems to be dancing or dangling in front of me. I see it, I just need a way to mobilize things so it can happen, and pray I have the energy to be able to do it.

I wrote a vision board and a bunch of stuff on that same true

Gee, now I should wish to lose the weight I gained in the last 3 years, hah!


I've been making collages lately after attending a webinar by an amazing Brooklynite whose work I've followed. Much to my surprise, it's been a deep while gentle form of therapy. *Gentle,* yes, it's been gentle. More than one beautiful soul on these pages describe the art they do as part of their therapy and wellness, and perhaps I've found mine? I found some resolutions to some perplexing questions.

I'm working on one collage on a complex topic, and it's taking me longer. I'm ok with that. I think it's a lot to work through.


I dreamed I was viewing a brunette giving birth and it didn't look like it was in America. We were in a living room with an open, screenless window. The lighting and home looked different. I viewed her from above her head and face, and she was in a tub filled with water and wearing a white linen shirt. She was moaning from the natural pains of labor, and then I stood at the woman's feet, next to a midwife who delivered the baby. After one final moan, baby slid into the water and gently floated and moved a little. I cleaned off the baby with the tub water, wrapped her in a white towel and then presented her to the mother. She was clearly exhausted but elated to meet the little one, while the midwife prepared to work with the umbilical cord.

I then was in a hospital room. I stood over my mother who laid on a bed under the covers and looked exhausted. I cooled her face with a cloth and held her hand. I then turned to my side, and he sat next to me while holding a newborn baby girl. I touched his shoulder and quietly watched. He held the baby close and I felt a gravity between them. I sensed he sent silent whispers of love, and looked at her like he would never let her go. Was I watching a bond form?

I felt concern for my mother's condition yet assured she'd feel better after rest, and looked again at the man with the girl. My heart swelled, and I kept my hand on his shoulder while I watched them. Although some of my attention was on my resting mother, I didn't feel separate. I felt very much a part of it, while also possessing my part.

I woke up from the dream so calm and rested, if not restored.

downwind | upstream