messages to agitated:
(click here to add new message):

from x-juliette-x :
Hey, you around? I'm not but stumble in here once in a forever. Just can't cut them ties to the past. much <33s
from raven72d :
I miss your stories...
from raven72d :
don't delete...and do update.
from euphoric-fae :
funny how memories don't last forever. delete. delete. delete.
from chagrine :
nooo... don't delete yourself :( or.. maybe you can give a copy of the old entries to those who might care about "the whole story"? (like me?)
from raven72d :
Don't give up your diary: I'd vur' much miss you.
from raven72d :
18 February... If that's a birthday: happy belated birthday!
from girl101 :
"sir, i have come to realize that i am acutely aware of your every movement in relation to mine." ...so universal. ♥
from raven72d :
Ummm....password?
from caged-freed :
Hey, this is just a note to let you know that I'm trying to resurrect C.A.G.E.D. - and I really hope you'll contribute. Check out the updated info, and take care!
from raven72d :
I loved the "girls who glitter" poem.
from starke- :
He has the best lyrics ever on the face of the planet.
from starke- :
I tried signing your guestbook and I can't?! But I just wanted to say I'm soooooo glad you have all those mp3's back up at Deformative!! And sooooo glad you like The Knife! ♥
from raven72d :
You do have people who read you and worry about you.
from sephiragrace :
I like your little headline thing on your profile page. <3
from raven72d :
I hope you'll stay in touch. I always did like getting letters from you.
from raven72d :
I love the girl in your layout!
from justenough :
Lauren, I've been reading your diaryland since 2002, when I was a sophomore in high school and listened to "Only Happy When It Rains" on repeat for most of my days. That pretty much sums up who I was. I know this is strange, coming out of no where at all, but I've always thought you were an amazing person. And I hope 2006 brings only beautiful things to you. Thank you for making an impact on my life. - Stephanie
from raven72d :
I do miss hearing from you. I hope 2006 goes well for you!
from koi-ishly :
hope you don't mind me adding you =)
from raven72d :
Are you at LJ, too?
from raven72d :
I hope you'll e-mail me soon.
from star-brite :
just wanted to say recently found you and i love your writing. and i also love that you make everyone you come in contact with listen to "center of the sun"...because *i* make everyone i come in contact with listen to that song. it's only right.
from raven72d :
How is autumn going?
from raven72d :
How have you been? I've missed hearing from you...
from spare-life :
I loved song's lryics that you posted (Center of the Sun), I liked them so much I'm putting them up on my own diary! With a link back to yours of course. =)
from soulstealer :
please know that i am interested in your words cuz they are good.
from delicategirl :
hey, I was always reading but now I'm writing again too. xxoo
from starke- :
The link for the dress your mom bought you is...not right, I guess. I'm wondering if it's the one with the waist cincher. I want that one sooo bad, but my boobs are huge and look stupid and I fucking hate them. >:(
from askingtomuch :
the last thing im trying to do is leave a typical pathetic message, but i read you diary everyday and sometimes when you dont write ill read old entries. for some strange reason you always seem to say the things i cant say. exactly how i feel. i just want u to know it's one of the greatest comforts ive found.
from starke- :
I tried to sign your guestbook but I couldn't. =/ That Leah Andreone song is amazing.
from sulk-- :
forgettable? i highly doubt that.
from lousrose :
hey sweetheart, do you think you could send me that deformative song by black eyes? i got it off your site a long time ago and fell totally in love with it, but i lost it when my pc crashed, so now i'm in withdrawals. [email protected] let me know :) love you!
from velvet-box :
Sometimes I can just fall into your words. Never stop writing, you are far too good at it. ♥
from sugarbabylon :
i agree with that observation. i notice that too. ~
from amber163 :
<3 im adding you if you dont mind
from raven72d :
I only hope that I'm on the list of people who've been kind to you... I rather think I want to be on your Good List.
from agitated :
all the more reason this person should actually do it. yes i'm quite hate-filled.
from raven72d :
opening a wrist is rather a harsh form of poetry...
from raven72d :
I want you to tell me about Xiu Xiu... And-- I for one will never laugh at you or mock you.
from starke- :
I went to deformative to find the mp3 for "I Broke Up" by Xiu Xiu and you don't have that music page anymore. :( Do you still know where to find it? I neeeeeed it.
from starlet-21 :
love the template, darling.
from fat0free0air :
That cartoon pisses me off. Cutters don't cut because they think it's "cool". Cutters also don't think it physically hurts. I don't like how that image of cutters is portrayed in that cartoon. I wish people understood...
from raven72d :
you are enchanting.
from raven72d :
write soon...
from gretchlin :
I just wanted to say that I love your diary, always have, I've read it for years, off and on, I know it sounds stalkerish but your life is a story put into poetry that sometimes I can't help but read. everything is so interesting and ur such a beautiful person. just thought I'd leave a note since I've only commented once before ~ Kara
from gela06 :
I love your layout <3
from m-antoinette :
you're new layout is so awesome!!!! i love it :) it suits you (since i nkow you so well or something from reading fragments of poetic prose..!) and by the way your poetic prose are fabulous! really. i'm sure you knew that already though. m
from raven72d :
Write soon... And we must talk.
from raven72d :
Cocaine is a winter's drug... You'll need opium or DMT for spring...
from raven72d :
Waking up with a girl's cheek pressed soft against one's chest. I've forgotten how that feels. But it is lovely.
from raven72d :
expect a letter...and perhaps a call.
from askingtomuch :
i dont mean or want to sound like the typical admirer, but i get so excited when you update. your words are truth, "the words i wish i wrote down"
from raven72d :
Keep the notes on file-- unused.
from blow-it-up :
are you okay?
from raven72d :
I like the idea of you one day getting wings tattooed down your shoulderblades... And the idea of you calling me someday.
from raven72d :
a good list, girl.
from blow-it-up :
hey you know the title of your layout? i just found the song that's from. i really like it. ♥
from raven72d :
feel free to call me on any midnight.
from raven72d :
I always imagine a girl whose hipbones and pelvic bones are prominent enough to lie sharp against my wrists as I kiss her tummy...
from raven72d :
A sad and lovely photo... I can't imagine anyone not wanting to wake up to those eyes across a pillow.
from m-antoinette :
i love your writing! it's fantastic. and i love the photo in your entry today, though it brings you much sadness. i love it anyway, it's beautiful in every way.
from lousrose :
i love you hon. *hugs*
from raven72d :
I hope we'll finally speak by phone in the Year Five...
from toocareless :
just wanted to say i absolutely and thoroughly love your diary. they're wonderful...your words. <3
from raven72d :
brilliant small poems.
from november-- :
i read every single one of your entries darling. how could any of us leave you? you have that style that thing that excites and keeps my eyes moving over the sentences wanting to go on to the next word quick. don't ever stop writing.
from raven72d :
What if someone else called?
from raven72d :
Powerful, erotic, scary... And utterly entrancing...
from raven72d :
The small fragments of your life that I can read make me think of red leaves and night falling.
from befuddled21 :
I want to give you a smile that perhaps could make you feel a little of the love that the world has to offer. It is just hard to find.
from raven72d :
i hope things go well with your grandfather... and that entry was sad and lovely...
from finalscore :
hey, i hope the surgery works for your grandpa and that he'll be all better.
from iamhubpluh :
If you are voting AGAINST Bush, check out http://BADNARIK.com he is for 100% EQUALITY right for the Gay/Lesbian community as well as for stoping the war in Iraq, and NOT sending more troops as Kerry is for (based on his debate answers). Vote your heart, not the less of two evils!
from raven72d :
the edge of the world is a place worth seeing
from raven72d :
I miss hearing from you...but I read you often, and I do love your words...
from bloodylip :
i love yr words. i can relate to them oh so well. yr going onto my buddy list &if you care to read mine it's username: sunsets / password: carcrashes
from fraildolbaby :
listen: trespassers william. you'll relate.
from un-afraid01 :
your diary is beautiful! i love it so much i have faved you <3tess
from lousrose :
EDs suck (now i know from first hand experience.) you're so beautiful lauren.
from raven72d :
a road trip. you need a road trip.
from raven72d :
Write soon, Lauren-Beth.
from raven72d :
Beth Orton is great music for lonely nights.
from sofisticated :
Your layout and words are so beautiful. They are inspiring in a way. Lovely.
from raven72d :
Cereal with soy milk... I'm not sure about that. But I'm glad you're okay...
from agitated :
nononono! i'm so sorry you thought it was about you cause it's not. that's the problem with online diaries.. but we both know that already. just no
from neuraleyes :
i hope you don't mean me when you're talking about the "i-n-f-a-t-u-a-t-i-o-n" didn't we talk about this a few months ago? it can't just be an infatuation. there is most definately something very very strong here. at least, that's how <b><i>I</i></b> feel. i hope you do, too. because like we both said... it's not like the feelings just 'went away' during this whole time. there all still there for me. :)
from blow-it-up :
...is complimenter a word? *ps. i sound really gushy and gross. disregard my insane tendency to go overboard with the complimenting, please. thankyou ok.
from blow-it-up :
i love how you breathe. i've never seen you breathe but you must breathe pretty cause anyone who writes like you do has to feel it in their pulse. inside them. i feel your words inside me and i hope that makes a difference to you, even though i know you feel like shit most of the time. just know that im not another obsessive complimenter and that i respect you and basically think you rock. <3
from delicategirl :
Well said babe
from raven72d :
Did my last letter ever arrive? Julie Ruin... What is she like?
from starke- :
Even though you're in so much pain, I love what you're writing right now. It's helping me. I'm at work and have been sitting here crying while talking to people on the phone, but I read that page on Rachael Sage, and I've read your entries and I'm not crying anymore. I wish I had a friend like you right now.
from lousrose :
*hugs* oh honey, i love you so much and i feel your pain so well.
from trappdfreedm :
when i read your words i feel like i've been transported into an old england attic, sitting near the window and watching the world go by.. you have an awesome gift
from raven72d :
Write me... I'll try to be a distraction.
from starlet-21 :
i believe no one has words more gorgeous than yours. <3 katie
from raven72d :
Holly Beth Vincent, "Honalu" and "Samurai and Courtesan"... two beautiful sad songs. Write soon.
from agitated :
actually it comes from the song i was listening to when i wrote that entry (nowplaying, at the bottom)... it's a reallllly beautiful, but sad, song.
from highxglitter :
where did the title of your recent entry come from? (i'm talking about the one that goes "she finally drank her pain away..") i like it.
from raven72d :
The woman needed to be punched. Seriously. I'm glad Katie defended you. People do need to just...*think*....about what theys ay before they say it.
from november-- :
aw, darling. people can be such ass holes. <3
from raven72d :
I recall the faces I've kissed, the faces next to mine in morning light... And I miss all of them.
from kill-my-star :
you should write a book. a memoir.
from purplebanana :
I love the title of your latest entry.
from starke- :
Oh boy you're a confusing girl. =) // I realized it was Azure Ray while on the way home from work. Now the question is, "it's just a virus..." Sarah Fimm or Nora (?) Whittaker? I've only listened to "Karen" once or twice. You listen to too much music. I can't remember it all at once.
from starke- :
"i'll never let your heart go where mine's been." Ok, for some reason I've been listening to that song recently, but right now I can't figure out who it is!! I just remember hearing that line. Sarah Fimm? I don't know. Help. =/
from whose2blame :
Le Tigre...something in common. I have really nothing to say cause im all new to this. haha ;)
from lousrose :
wanted to stop by and say hey! *hugs* i love you <3
from raven72d :
Lauren... do write soon. I miss your notes and letters.
from suprgoddess :
you're beautiful baby...cause i say so.
from kill-my-star :
mm, fuck yeah. [different is...]. now i remember why i read your diary.
from blow-it-up :
oh please. don't give me that ugly girl shit. you are the coolest girl on diaryland, bitch. <3
from myx0mat0sis :
I was just wondering if "fuschia" is your diary as well. I was reading your livejournal and then came to diaryland to check up and fuschia had the same entry from your lj but in different words. Link: http://fuschia.diaryland.com/040512_92.html
from inaptbeauty :
got yr words in my diary once again. now lady, yr taking in my heart w/ it! i absoFUCKINly ♥ you!!!
from heartshaped :
prettiness
from raven72d :
srite soon, lauren... i do miss you.
from thedevlyn :
you can no more hide being in love than you can hide a cough.
from thedevlyn :
Nice MP3, I can see why you have it on repeat.
from em-powered :
eh...added you to my list along with the masses. i've been meaning to leave you a message. hmmm...well, what better time than the present. i could actually smell the asphault...that was something. i love stargazing in grass...but, can get kinda itchy. i think you and i could use some hammocks, yeah? :P *hugs*
from inaptbeauty :
i got your words printed in my diary, printed for 5 days. hope you dont mind being quoted ♥
from blow-it-up :
ohmy. whatthefuck did you do that with? it looks. it looks.. exquisite.
from reevo :
you really are wonderful. i hope you don't mind but i added you. sar xx
from agitated :
YES. DEFINITELY. quite.
from lastyeargirl :
Do you ever get the feeling that we're careless with our thoughts... like when we write them down we're starting to give them away indiscriminately?
from lousrose :
your guestbook has not worked for me in the longest time haha. have i ever told you that you listen to the best music? i could sit at my computer all day just downloading the songs you mention you're listening to in your entries and have a new collection of really really awesome mp3s! i downloaded the sugarcubes one, and like it a lot, although the chorus does sound like she is just painfully gargling listerine while attempting to sing hahaha. i hope everything is well with you. i don't even know if i've talked to you much since i updated your membership thingy- i was reminded 'cause i just got an email that my own has to be paid for again, so off i go again to my dad with his faithful credit card LOL. where would i be without diaryland? :) i love you! *hugs* xoxo. whit
from raven72d :
Wonderful new layout... Write soon!
from urbanistic :
miss.. you are wonderful. & i love the layout.
from x-girl-falls :
miss agitated, you are a very beautiful person.
from lifew0ntwait :
you are a very talented writer. ♥
from neuraleyes :
about "the entry," sorry. didn't mean to creep you out.
from neuraleyes :
nympho? you? sweet! ...i mean, uhh... j/k o.O =P
from neuraleyes :
you are too k3wl, L. thank you for the compliments, as much as i may disagree with me being a good writer. (i disagree with anyone who says that. yeah i know, pathetic half-assed artist who's always like "ugh, i suck. don't bother saying you liked the poem, you know it was terrible." god, i'm such a r3j3kt.
from agitated :
it's just my friends initials (didn't want to put his name there)
from blues-band :
What's a.w.k mean?
from neuraleyes :
you SO rule. and yes, you ARE pretty like drugs.
from november-- :
may i ask who that is on your layout
from invisibledon :
thanks
from autumn-death :
Hi darling. I like your diary and survey. :)
from raven72d :
I've missed hearing from you...
from amber-darko :
email?
from on-my-own31 :
Can I have the username/password please? =D
from rudebug :
too bad you don't live in canada. we could have started a band together. k.b.
from x-girl-falls :
hey love. :) ive been reading you for a while & i just wanted to tell you that over here, sometimes your words make up a net for me to fall into. youre like an inspirational dream... if you know what i mean. <3<3 ♥ kimia.
from chagrine :
pretty pretty pretty layout :))
from lousrose :
ur guestbook isn't working for me for some reason lmao damn signmyguestbook. that picture is pretty- almost as pretty as you :P :) <3
from agitated :
yes, you read my mind, but being home an hour or less every day has been pretty good at preventing that from happening quickly.
from chagrine :
hey, isn't it about the time to change the layout?
from apinksofa :
i know exactly how you feel. i felt so alone until i read your last entry. thanks lol <3
from lousrose :
hey sweetie- the box in your guestbook to sign it isn't working, well it could just be my shitty dell, a lot of things have been screwy on it lately. sorry for taking so long to reply. oh hon, giving you that was nothing, i feel like i owe you so much more. and happy birthday, my best wishes and all my love to you doll :) whit <3 <3
from tincan815 :
Maybe there's too much reason
from inaptbeauty :
happy valentines luv! ♥
from inaptbeauty :
luv, i hope you wont be mad if i quoted you and left it up for a week.. ♥ you're absofuckinly beautiful
from perplexity15 :
You've probably heard this a million times already, judging through all the other notes sent to you, but you're an extraordinary writer. Seriously, I feel like I'm in another -- more true and abstract-- world when I read your entries. And the best part? They're all true
from lovemetwice :
you rock my fucking world. had to tell you. i adore you. xo
from raven72d :
Thanks muchly for the letter! Don't be afraid to call... And I loved the dinosaur stationery. I'm a major fan of cool stationery (Hello Kitty, Pochacco, Tare Panda, penguins)... Write often, lovely one.
from x-girl-falls :
yr layout is fucking /gorgeous/, love. &yr words make me faint. *immediately adds you to favorites list* 'cause, youre just special &privileged that way. <33
from xwords :
hi, i quoted you in here. properlink is up! yeah, just so you know... -Li♥
from inaptbeauty :
hey hun, i quoted you in my page, hope you didn't mind.... you could view it now.. and it'll stay up in a week. ♥
from starlet-21 :
hey dollface, i'm thinking of taking psychology next year, beacuse i think i'd enjoy it, but can you just tell me why you're so in love with me. i'd feel more secure in my decision to take it because i have to drop other things to fit it in my schedule. just drop me a line, gorgeous :) <3 - katie
from raven72d :
The photos are incredible.
from inaptbeauty :
i just came back from deformative... it sucked me right in... i envy the box you made &&that lovely sweet thing you did for your bf... :) keep up the artistic works! ♥
from garyhoare :
What does <3 mean?
from raven72d :
You have a letter on the way... And you have all my wishes that life gets better... Stay out of 12 degree weather unless you're massively protected... Frostbite and hypothermia are...no joke.
from thedevlyn :
My best to you. It sounds like you need it right now.
from soul-eraser :
i'm wrapped around your every word. when you write, it comes out in beautifully warped verses, like a twisted song. the way you write tells the truth but leaves room for imagination
from starlet-21 :
thank you soso much, beautiful. i have been in love with your diary for a while and it meant tons and tons that you left that note for me. thank you thank you thank you. let me know if you ever need anything. <3 - katie
from starlet-21 :
this is going to sound insane, but i'm about to lose someone i really care about and if you could do me a HUGE favor and leave chris-uk a note to tell him to forgive me, it would mean the world. i'm hoping if enough persuasive notes are left it might impact him to listen to me. <3 - katie
from justenough :
you have always been an inspiration. you completely amaze me.
from starlet-21 :
your writing is beautiful and i hope your christmas is just as wonderful. have a great one.
from highxglitter :
i got your letter THANKYOUUU ;o <3
from raven72d :
Fragma... tell me about fragma.
from sadmoonbeam :
or is it the hibernation..
from sadmoonbeam :
re-treasuring the little things in life again? go on.
from mixup :
WTF? Where are you? And your livejournal? Don't bug on me now...
from snow--flakes :
I am confused. But I will wait; I'll never leave <3
from likeaforest :
o my. have i simply been sitting in front of my computer too long? your index page is stark white, but my buddy list keeps informing me that there are updates being made! and i'm nosey! and want to read them! drats.
from raven72d :
I wonder what you see when you look at snow falling at night...
from acidic-me :
edit to the guestbook entry, that was supposed to say "The Sharon Osbone Show" Sorry about that. You can tell it's finals week...
from anhelo :
And I loved your diary, every moment of it.
from highxglitter :
a lack of sleep can cause hallucinations. plus you had pills in your system.
from raven72d :
I hope you have a warm and pleasant winter... (I like Kevin the Llama)
from xwidexawakex :
intoxicating ...
from kill-my-star :
hmm, nice entry. STIMULATING? that works....so hoorah for you. side note: i saw cobra high live. fun stuff.
from tincan815 :
Have a very happy Thanksgiving!!
from justenough :
i fucking adore you.
from mixup :
Oh, my.
from mazeofmirors :
I couldn't have said it better myself. I think certain people should take a class on proper concert etiquette. How was the Le Tigre, though?
from mixup :
And how was the show itself, Ms L?
from thissidedown :
yes.. i did nearly die from being squished by an excessively large man, who's fat managed to flop round me and a friend & yes.. drunken people at gigs are stupid annoying <3 xx
from soul-eraser :
yeah. i feel like no one knows me..everybody thinks im some sort of freak of nature, the loner who doesn't talk to anybody, but really i'd just like to cry out and tell people "You don't know me, but you wish you did" nobody knows how beautiful you are until you let them sweetheart.
from soul-eraser :
you're beautiful. I hope you know that. not just aesthetically, although that is true. You have views and opinions that more than half this world needs to hear and understand and actually listen to and follow. You're very deep as well. I'd give my life to have half of your mind and feelings, half of your aesthetic beauty. forgive me if i say you're lucky.
from shyeyesx :
oops. *is and not if. <3
from shyeyesx :
your new layout if beautiful. you are so talented. <3
from so-dead :
oh my god. who would hang themselves in a park for unsuspecting people like you to see? i mean, it's not that i don't pity them because things must've been pretty bad for them but i'm surprised that someone would put their death out in the spotlight for anyone to see. :/
from pennyplayer :
The Fire piece was excellent.
from it-is :
I'm missing your writings like nobody's business. Please give me a password?
from starlet-21 :
you are beautiful. simply. i don't know what i would do without your words to relate to. they get me through some really tough bouts of absolutely worthlessness and feeling of being completely powerless against him. thank you. drop me a line sometime, please. <3 - katie
from x-juliette-x :
& i hav a new email, [email protected] ♥♥
from x-juliette-x :
can i hav the pass please? ♥♥ i miss reading your journal (})
from mazeofmirors :
Ewww. My schedule is like that too. My roommate's old college had Friday's off! I think we should go on strike<3
from sad82girl02 :
i can't get to your guestbook so i'm requesting a password here!
from raven72d :
I hope you'll let me hve a password...
from mazeofmirors :
I love that song by Le Tigre and also Snow On The Sahara, which is on my Lilith Fair cd<3
from mazeofmirors :
I like your photo's and I hope you feel better. You might get a letter from me soon. [once I get around to writing letters. I am lazy.]<3
from justenough :
i'm sick too, hun. it sucks. :( feel better soon ♥
from shyeyesx :
My email adress is [email protected] Thx Swty. :)
from delicategirl :
Thanks for sending me your password. I love reading your journal because I swear sometimes, I can relate so much. take care. xxooo
from shyeyesx :
i luv your journal. i was wondering if i could please get in on it. thx sweetie. <3
from oobersugar :
o!! I'm SO glad you're back. it's easy to see why you are so well loved by so many people. you're so honest in your writing and I really admire that. stay wonderful, <3 min x x x
from his-boy :
hey.I'd been reading your diary but You've locked it.I was wondering if you could let me read in?.please?
from justenough :
hey hon; i'm glad you're not leaving for good ...i've always really really enjoyed your diary. trust me when i say i know how you feel. though i'm not NEARLY as "famous" as you are, i'm constantly worrying about who is reading what and how they are percieving my thoughts. i have on many occasions considered locking my diary. so anyway, i'm glad you arent getting rid of it all together. i say you print out what you have so far and send them to a publisher. i wouldn't be surprised if your pretty words were famous on the bookshelves some day. though that would defeat the whole purpose of locking it to keep peeping eyes from seeing, i suppose. anyway, you're gorgeous and i adore you.
from highxglitter :
[email protected] did you ever get my letter?
from starlet-21 :
[email protected] <3 - katie
from fix-my-heart :
sorry i'm an idiot, i'd like your password and i forgot to put my email on here. so here it is. [email protected]
from thissidedown :
tis [email protected], thankies Xx
from devolve :
hey, could I have the password? and username i guess. [email protected] thanks; i'd like to continue to read.
from fraildolbaby :
dear i am so glad that you changed your mind about the diary. i nearly died. i was actually going to write you a letter and tell you exactly what your diary meant to me. buti was hoping that you'd send me the pw/username so that i can still view - if that is okay. [email protected] i'm glad you are staying. i really am.
from serratedtart :
i'm glad you're staying. may i have the un/p? [email protected]
from kill-my-star :
oh _YES_!! im so glad youre staying [n_n <-- so glad]. we should throw a party because of your...staying...ness...yep!
from theplayhouse :
it would be a loss not to be able to read your diary. [email protected]
from bruised0x :
may i have the password [email protected]
from fix-my-heart :
i dont know the password and i'd like to have it dear.:-)-ashley
from lifew0ntwait :
thanks a bunch. my email is [email protected]
from thissidedown :
sssh... could i have the password? xx
from dorkzarehot :
Can I please get the username and password? I've been a fan of your diary for awhile now. Thank you! -Angela
from starlet-21 :
can i please have the username and password? i'm really glad you've decided to stay. <3 - katie
from mixup :
YO! Drop me a username - password again...I've got a brain like a sieve.
from lifew0ntwait :
i would like to please have a password. but if not, i understand since you don't know me or anything. thanks.
from so-dead :
pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease email me the user/password. you're at the top of my list! and so yeah, maybe it's alphabetical but still, i don't know what i'll do if i can't read your daily beauties any longer! my email is [email protected] xXxO-julia
from alicenobody :
can i have a password too? i read you every time you update and i look forward to reading.([email protected])
from lousrose :
honey could you refresh my memory and email me the username/pass? :) [email protected] i'm so happy you're staying!! love you, <3 p.s. oh by the way next week on friday or saturday my dad and i are taking a bus down to springfield mass and then we'll be picked up and go to somers, conn to get my car. anyway i have no idea if you're close to springfield but whenever i'm in mass i think of you! and no i'm not going to stop by your work and randomly say, "nice mp3" LMFAO haha, xoxo.
from envyyou :
can I have a password pretty please??? ((e-mail is [email protected])) ♥
from kill-my-star :
ill miss your entries, they were really quite something. perhaps ill send you something along in the post someday. until then, take care & carry on.
from equivocally :
Thank you so much for the wonderful entries that sometimes gets us through our days. It's sad to see this girl who's been writing so faithfully to her journal go, but we understand. It's a lot to say this but you mean a hell of a lot to the people who read you and I know you know that you touch people's hearts. I hope you move on from doing it online, and continue to in real life. Hope you come back; <3 (!) forever, Lauren. You've made a BIG difference to my life and others'. [here's to wishing the rest of your life will be as beautiful as you, and your words.] -jonie
from tincan815 :
I understand the need to focus on your other stuff but I will miss your frequent posts. Thank you for the explanation on why you will be deleting some things but I hope you know you did not owe it to anyone (in case you felt that you did). Though my little diary does not have nearly the following that yours does, I do find myself having to be more and more conscious of what I write as more people read it. It's all very odd. Good luck and keep writing!!
from javabill :
"....." ???
from shyeyesx :
you have the best layouts ever. this one as usual is remarkable. i love reading your words. :)
from thissidedown :
sounds like a pretty idea xx
from mazeofmirors :
You have come a long way, love<3
from overtaken :
You're quite amazing (but you already knew that) *smile*
from oobersugar :
lauren beth, I LOVE you! I've been reading agitated for so long, I can't quite believe it myself. the trick is to evolve, not to change. I went back to september 1/2 2002 and it was all vaguely familiar to me, but I hadn't realised just how much you HAD evolved. it's fucking great. and for the record, I don't think you're whiny and boring. and though you don't need it, *I* need to read you <333
from dne :
just curious if you got the mp3 i had one or two failed attempts. i swear this email technology thing is just crazy, i just dont get it. -boyjason
from bendme :
yay for effexor
from thissidedown :
"i think if i got that tattoo on my wrist, it would really reduce the likeliness of me ever cutting it as badly as i have in the past..." that my plan as well, i just have to find one i like, and work out a way to stand the pain [i passed out during my last one] <3 xx
from mazeofmirors :
I know I don't know you, but I'm proud of you, too! I've been reading you for a while. I'll send you things, too if you want. I'll be going to Regis in Weston,MA. Anyway, just wanted to say "good job" with getting through classes and such<3
from mixup :
I'll send you a poem...once I get one worthy of you. Love, congrats...T
from simon-lagrue :
*HUGS* Contratulations! I know there are many times when I wish that I could summon the courage that you are able to summon every day when you go to School. Awesome!
from xbeautyfiend :
I will send you something. I'm just not sure what, or when. (♥)
from fix-my-heart :
i know how you felt last night, hope it gets better
from insertsmilex :
this lock is only temporary, i hope [?]
from neuroticaa :
your lifeline entry hit me right HERE ::points to gut:: <3
from mazeofmirors :
I LOVE the purse, darling<3
from stoner-girl :
Hey, I lovey our diary - your layout rocks and Tori Amos is just amazing. You write really well.
from blackisblack :
you are so hot i want to perform unmentionable things to every square section part of you and your body and then when i'm done do it again perhaps even a thrice time. "in the study w/ the candelstick"- Colneral Mustard
from tincan815 :
Your passion for the piano amazes me, along with everything else.
from kidofkingdom :
oh i just read your most embarrassing moment in a survey with the pepto in the film rolls, oh, god, i bust a gut, check out your surveys and find that one and check out my most embarrassing moment.
from tincan815 :
The guestbook can be such a bitch, how I can't sign again so fast when I haven't signed yet...anyway, usually I am not an advocate for fads, etc, but I think it is time for class to make a come back.
from deprecated :
hi my names stacey...i was looking at ur diary and in the grl section it said that u go to clark university...im going into my senior year at high school and i was thinking about applying to clark...i guess im asking u if its ok if i can ask u questions about the school...my e-mails [email protected] u dont have to respond or anything its just that im interested in going to that school and i think its ironic that i was looking at ur diary and u go there and its like an oppurtunity 4 me to ask u how hard it is getting into the schoool and such...sorry 2 seem like an overly-annoying person i dont know any1 thats applied there b4 or anything and u go there wow im just rambling im sorry
from mixup :
Listening to "Diamonds and Rust", eh? Such a beautiful song...and now that I know you've heard Joanie do it, I'll never beable to perform it near you again... ;-)
from mixup :
thanks for coming...i've felt a bit abandoned lately (not by you, by a lot of people) and it meant a lot that you were there.
from mixup :
Thank you. While it would mean a lot to me to have you there, I really want you to do what's best for you, ok? I'd love to see you. Don't worry aobut it if you can't...there's always the next one.
from mixup :
well, my dear, I missed you. i'm featuring next week...please come.
from bruised0x :
may i have a password
from loves-sohard :
you, my dear, are extrodinary. i am in awe.
from leely :
your writing makes me speechless. its [[fucking]] beautiful<X3
from simon-lagrue :
:-( There is always another stone to jump to. Find a safe and stable one, ok?
from mixup :
my dear, what's up? you were ecstatic for days; who's messing with you? I'll fuck em up if ya want....
from kill-my-star :
mm. rain. we had a 'torrential downpour' last night. it lasted ten shining minutes. with bonus thunder and lightning. and then it was gone. and its spitting out now. but not worth it to go lie in the grass and stare up at the storm clouds. and thank you, about the html stuff..that would make sense. hurrah. so now i can leave some normal notes and not ones full of my incessant whining.
from kill-my-star :
i just looked. it stops after ten entries...its...fucking odd. and gah, im so sorry, im being a real ass here because i know its not your problem and yet im dumping on you anyways because i know youre the only one who might know the answer that i know of. so...many apologies and if you dont get back to me, i understand. ps:latest entries of yours=thumbs up, as always
from kill-my-star :
i know im a pesty brat, but how in fucks name do i get this stupid right-click block and select-block to work on all the older entries...its only working on the ones ive wrote since i put it up...man im an ass....sorry. meep.
from tincan815 :
About the layout thief: it is heinous (sp?) to steal a layout. It is worse to be obvious about it. To not change the contact info, though, that is just lazy and dumb. I hope your response e-mail was as vicious as deserved for this situation.
from incubus420 :
leave me note por favor
from kill-my-star :
i agree....hmm i am flooding your notes with incessant pointless ass. it happens though...so...it must be okay.
from kill-my-star :
oh and ive really enjoyed your last few entries. -thumbs up-
from kill-my-star :
it especially pisses me off how i used to be on tod and i came to diaryland because a) tod sucked and b) i wanted a place that no one i actually KNOW knew about so i could feel...more free (?) expressing myself. of course, somehow the entire entourage of people who have spoken half a sentence to me now know about it. christ on a bike...and half these people i didnt KNOW knew about it so id be saying things and theyd question me or reply or something and id be like, uhh, say what now? >_<
from neuroticaa :
i really like that last entry. i duno its cool =)
from equivocally :
this is jonie, and I'm sure you've forgotten who I am but you have me linked in your diary but frostytouch isn't where i write anymore, I'm sorry to say. [not that this info actually matters, but you know.] take care always, xx
from dorkfists :
i like your songs
from kill-my-star :
yeah i tried that...i might just be going senile though...and yeah. does it ever creep you out that people read your diary and you dont know it because they dont really leave notes and whatnot? it creeps me out...somehow. but its a control issues i have. ^_^
from kill-my-star :
mmm always an abundance of new fantastic entries....and also, thanks for the codes [do you know how to get them to work on older pages?]
from tincan815 :
It just felt like an appropriate time to express my envy of your way with words. Good day.
from kill-my-star :
would you be willing to share your no right click and no highlight codes with me? id really appreciate it. thanks for considering, take care.
from mixup :
Now, I know I praised the layout...but while I could read your diary a few days ago, I can no longer read it at all...I simply get a black box instead of text. I know I haven't changed settings. What's up?
from kill-my-star :
your newest layout is only....viewable with a 1024 X 768 screen res....you probably know that, but i just thought id point it out in hopes that youd consider fixing it. thanks.
from mixup :
GREAT layout!!!!
from mixup :
Well, I find you inspirational...but I do know what you mean. By the way, did you know that we actually had julianna luecking as a feature at the Asylum once, years ago? She was great. It was back when we were at our previous venue.
from mixup :
You look happy. I like that.
from pixie-cutter :
one word. wow, your amazing. okay, its a little more than one but i'm sure you get me. b xox
from mazeofmirors :
I like your diary. Your very creative. I live near you, by the way, in southern NH. I was going to UNH [but that didn't work out] so I most likely will be going to Regis in Weston, Ma. Anyway, I added you to my alwaysgrowing buddylist. I hope you don't mind<3
from tincan815 :
I agree with you about labels, I was actually talking to some of my friends about that a while ago. The focus becomes condemning others before anything good or bad can happen, it's all just built on the universal insecurities. It's just too bad that we can't all relax (myself included) and let the good and the bad just happen, instead of always building the walls of defense that are labels.
from mixup :
OK. Let's start thinking about how to do it.
from kill-my-star :
great entry on feminism and the whatnot.
from mixup :
i'll help you find the guts, if you're willing.
from mixup :
Jeez louise. One fo these days, i've got to get you to read this stuff out loud to people. you have no idea how powerful some of it is; more important, there is power in giving it open voice that would help YOU with it. i'm not kidding.
from steadysilent :
my lovely**** ops..
from steadysilent :
you...are amazing. i love how you write. its like everything i ever felt. and your the writter. i love it. and your mouse or rat? is so cute!!!!! xoxo take care me lovely.
from mixup :
the "suicide is within your control" thing: no one who has not been there will ever fully understand. keep on keeping on.
from bruised0x :
ooh i am jealous ;) whats his/her name
from white-bread :
i thought this would make you happy, kind of: you know i've never listened to any tori just because i never though to or something. i was thinking i would give her a try, any song reccomendations? (i'm sure you have millions)
from beagle47 :
hello. thanks for listing my entry. also, more importantly even, my wife and i thought punch drunk love was such a beautiful love story. i'm glad to know you listed it, then listed my entry. seems to mean a lot more to me in that combination. i wish you peace. (and i really mean that).
from white-bread :
i love what i'm reading :)
from mixup :
Sweetie, i'm sorry. anything I can do?
from it-is :
&i am so sorry about becca, 'cause nobody deserves to die that way. when i read your entry & saw the pictures i felt sick to my stomach. i want to say something to make it all better, but... what are words for the loss of a life? stay strong.
from it-is :
eee! you. are. so. HOT. just thought i'd let you know. xox.
from oobersugar :
hello darling. I've been away, and now I'm back. your writings are as raw as ever, I forget why I went away. england is getting warmer, and my brain dissolved in ethanol. keep writing, love min xxxxxx
from white-bread :
i know what you mean, when a guy says "hi sarah" i'm in love. i've been reading your diary for a while.
from i-am-undone :
amazing.amazing. amazing. way with words.
from i-am-undone :
amazing.amazing. amazing. way with words.
from bejoujou :
you are really something. i think your writings are amazing. :)
from distressful :
well i reg @ faceparty and added you as a buddy. i kinda like the voice thingy. my shitname is tearsandkisses. nickname. i don't know why, but then it's something. or nothing. i love your layout and your new song and some other things. and i hate other things like these people in my class. that's another story... sorry.
from highxglitter :
ahhaha i have the same dreams, i had one last night. i swear i am not kidding dont they freak you out?
from violent-sky :
for some reason i feel like holding you in my arms rocking you back && forth to make you feel loved. youre amazing darling. <3
from serratedtart :
youre rad
from mixup :
Another Saturday night at home, eh? Yeah, me too.
from stupid--gurl :
hey, i somehow came across your journal and fell in love with your layout (the last one you had). So I started reading your journal and realized that we have soo much in common. I just thought Id tell you I find you a very beautiful, bright, interesting and mysterious person. :] I was also wondering if you could make a simple layout for me? I would greatly appreciate it.
from my-last-word :
heyy... my friend showed me your diary, and it is honestly amazing. i love the way you write and the things you write about. i have a "beauty mark" on my right shoulder too... ohh, how strange!
from chordchild :
thanks so much for your support of caged-freed. please feel free to submit an entry...(we're a little low on those at this point.) :) take care!
from raven72d :
I've missed hearing from you...
from it-is :
no matter where i go on diaryland, i keep finding you. and every time i do it's like rediscovering beauty. i hope you become everything you dream of, 'cause you deserve it and so much more. xox.
from caged-freed :
saw you were a member of the edsufferer diaryring and thought this new forum at caged-freed might interest you. check it out, if you can, and take care.
from rainyday6 :
Hey. Your diary's layout is awesome, and your entries are entertaining. keep it up! ^_^ (Just thought I'd let you know)
from mixup :
Hey -- did you get the e-mail?
from brokenwords- :
i tried signing your guestbook, but im not sure if it worked, hah. so now i'm leaving a note. just wanted to say i agree with you, and that i think you rock<3
from dokuritsu :
i read dudley road. tony was right. it's absolutely beautiful. and, regarding wee-snaw, (bwahahahahaha) we're going out for lunch before we go to work this afternoon.. i have been taking care of him very very well and we've had a blast thus far. he misses you, though. oddly, me too. zat crazed? possibly. jettin time.. ~j.
from z0tl :
congratulations on your upcoming 1593rd entry. your stamina is deadly! rock 0n!
from sad82girl02 :
i didn't realize saying letters and numbers in your head constantly was a disease i just knew i did it. i thought i was the only one who did but i guess i'm not. like if i hear a really long word ex: supercalifragilisticexpialidocious i have to count out each letter to see if it ends in a even number i.e. 10, 20, 30 and if it doesn't i go insane with adding words to it so it does end in an even number......i thought i was crazy ... maybe i still am but it's nice to know i'm not the only one :)
from shampain19 :
damn u have alot of messages, well here is another. I love your diary and i think your a totally kick ass girl and beautiful. much luv
from mixup :
Looking back over recent notes, I notice that Jesus loves you. Isn't that enough? (I owe you an e-mail. Expect it this week.)
from dokuritsu :
'because anywhere we bear the burdens of our destinies, we hope for kindred spirits.. patron saints of our cause to guide us through.. we practice our suffering with the stoicism of martyrs, hope strangers will guess at our purpose, name us anew, bring us to some new realization.. wearing rage in our passions.. and viciousness in the intensity of our love.' ~ r. bonair-agard you are truly inspiring. never forget that. ~j. wolf
from inca-roads :
i'm sad cause i can't read your diary without ruining my eyes...i'm on a mac and your type is too small and the letterspacing is too wide. what's a boy to do?
from and-e :
i be leavin a note.
from distressful :
...ok so i try to look like myself, to dress like myself and all that people see is appearance. it's frustrating to find someone to hang out that does really look inside.and now this war shit...where are we ending? fuck this world, all i want is a place to live...
from meb4him :
God loves you. He really does. I don't know what you are going thru right now inside but got brought me to your diary for a reason. The truth shall set you free and the truth is Jesus died to save us from our sins and He wants nothing more than for ou to know Him so you may be saved also. I know this may all sound cheesy and religious but I want to encourage you tho hear this please. This world is a pretty scary place, especially now. It brings me comfort to know that I am not alone that I have a protector that never leaves my side. That's God. He makes me feel safe. You may laugh at this or want to curse me out and tell me that I'm a complete and total moron but that doesn't matter to me. I just want you to know that someone loves you very much and died to meet you.Jesus.
from burnedlily :
i love your diary.
from raven72d :
I hope you can push out through heavy doors into clear, cold, clean air and feel free...
from x-juliette-x :
your welcome :D i liek giving out hugs, cant live without em. if you ever need another one, ask!! <3<3 julia
from agitated :
i hate everything
from mixup :
Thank you for coming back.
from mixup :
Ummmmm....password? Pretty please? (seriously...is everything ok? hit me bc)
from inca-roads :
if this is temporary, i can wait. if not, i can't. i need to follow you...
from twilight78 :
could i have the pw...? please...? *puppy eyes*
from x-juliette-x :
oh no its locked :( can i have the password lauren? <3<3 julia
from mixup :
Good seeing you tonight...if you read my most recent entry, you'll get a sense of where i'm at. it sucks...stay strong, one of us has to.
from raven72d :
I've missed hearing from you...
from ohmakemeover :
<3.
from kill-my-star :
mm, good entry. it answered my thoughts too, i was reading your lifeline and random facts and was blown away by it because it seems like so much and such. im sure you know what i mean. anyhow, i really enjoyed that entry, and i did your survey and looked around some more, then i noticed the private entries part and i was wondering if perhaps you would be kind enough to share with me the password? if not, thanks for considering it anyhow. kristen girl;
from notquiteoct :
oh god. i fucking laughed when i read that. i could fill the space with compliments, but i won't unless you'd really like. i enjoy.
from liaklunk :
words are never enough. ever.
from kill-my-star :
new hair! new bathing suit! tis lovely. i think i need a little bit of both myself...oh well.
from x-porcelain :
you are beautiful.
from kill-my-star :
welcome world miss ann thrope? your musical preference kind of reminds me of a good friends. and nice fuck diary. i havent much else to say, so ill go check out this diary now.
from mixup :
"a crush on my blood": Damn. Such a good line...and me too honest to steal it from you.
from inca-roads :
yes, happy birthday.
from mixup :
Happy birthday...may you truly be reborn in the coming year.
from distressful :
holy, love declarations i love indeed. keep improving your layouts, doing them for others is a good way of doing it. i guess...
from raven72d :
I've spent a lifetime constructing escape-pod identities so I don't have to be myself.
from raven72d :
I miss hearing from you...
from inca-roads :
lauren beth you are fucking beautiful. your necklace of words are beautiful. burn your goddamn horrors in effigy and celebrate the now that you can become. please.
from xbrokenkill :
that was amazing. but you are so much more then a question mark nobody wants to see.
from mixup :
Substance abuse -- GREAT PIECE. Really.
from justenough :
substance abuse: wow. that was nothing short of beautiful. you are everything i want to become.
from narcoleptic8 :
I NEVER get anything done before midnight! That's not weird. At least, I don't think it is.
from brokenwords- :
you rock<3
from mixup :
I think I'm gonna have to listen to some My Ruin...I like this. I like it a lot.
from distressful :
this evening we'll find a new dress to make sentences out of it. i really like those pictures.
from raven72d :
I'm rather fond of webcam whores-- and you're certainly a lovely one.
from inca-roads :
pix+pain=beauty
from mixup :
hey, re your own voice: I know that one big time right now.
from sad82girl02 :
i really don't know where to begin. i absolutely love your diary. i've been skipping casually over it for the longest time and today is the first time i actually took the time to give it more than a once over. it's nice to know i'm not the only fucked up person out there....if that's good or not you can draw your own conclusions. your life is intriguing and sad but real. i like that about you. i will continue to be a fan!
from agitated :
thank you john, but courtney? i have the eyeliners.. diaryland fucks up sometimes.. idk
from distressful :
ah the ever glowing truth of recreating a blog. i don't know my settlement but i love to write. did i say i loved very much your current layout? yeah it's courtney...but the whole thing is preety, change in the mood, light bright somewhat happy and girl power...aaaaaa i want to scream.
from mixup :
That last note before this one: isn't the whole point of the sweetness that love can bring only made clear in contrast to the pain it can also conceal? Can't have one without the other, to my way of thinking. Anyway: you've been doing some great writing lately...really beautiful, soul searching, poignant and bittersweet. loved the one about being "a vampire with a taste for boy's blood"...normally I dislike vampire imagery as too overused, but that one was good on a lot of levels...keep strong...
from xbrokenkill :
hearts should be rented, then returned, no hard feelings, no tears, no pain. or maybe rent to own, depending on the situation. anything to avoid the pain that comes after its broken.
from raven72d :
I think we had the same nickname in high school.
from x-juliette-x :
noo!! the pretty new layout is too big for my screen resolution thingie and half of it wont show :( i cant see the entry, what do i do now? <3<3 julia
from mixup :
Like the new layout -- it even works on Netscape! lol...
from be-my-heroin :
i heart the eyeliners more than life itself ;xoxox .jen
from justenough :
wow. that latest entry really hit home. you wrote it really well too. :) (ps. beautiful new layout) <3
from xbrokenkill :
i love the layout, tis simply gorgeous ( as are your others, i was restless yesterday and ended up looking through your links and such, you're gorgeous as well ) i seem to be distancing myself from friends as well. maybe its something in the air?
from slash-mel :
Welcome to tatu diaryring; thanks for joining.
from tincan815 :
Well, I was going to leave this in your guestbook, but guestbooks have been betraying me all the time. Anyway, I don't know how you do all of it, it's enough of a struggle for me to deal with trying to be happy and perfect, let alone pretty. That would be too much.
from raven72d :
There's something to be said for being invisible...
from mixup :
Looks great...exactly as I pictured.
from raven72d :
Boredom, yes... I can survive almost anything except boredom.
from tincan815 :
I love your new resolutions, I hope they go well!
from mixup :
Thanks for the defense, L.
from lost-puppys :
such venom.... though you do have exquisite taste in music. i hadnt meant to offend him so. ah well, "cant please every one, shouldnt even try"
from inca-roads :
i'd love to chat with you sometime...about woostah (i lived there for 10 years), music, life, etc. do you IM?
from dipso :
hello agitated ...sorry youre so agitated liked some bye luck to you
from barenaked500 :
Go for the nose! The nostril! I have mine done and it didn't really hurt plus is really easy to take care of. I wish I would have gotten it done sooner. Oh well. I don't know too much about the lip so I can't help ya there. I also think right under the lip is really sexy too. If I wasn't gonna be a teacher I think I'd get that done. :)
from agitated :
YAH CAUSE YOU KNOW I'M NOT A BIG ENOUGH PERVERT/FOOL/BORED IDIOT TO TAKE PICTURES LIKE THAT, NEVER MIND POST THEM ON MY PUBLIC INTERNET DIARY!!! haha <3sasha<3
from mixup :
I admit it, I clicked...but only to see what picture you posted...tee hee.
from agitated :
haha.. i know.. that was the plan, don't worry. i mailed you a letter.
from raven72d :
If you do the nose, do it just on one nostril or in the side. Septum piercings are hideous.
from mixup :
Nose. Definitely nose. Go for the ring...it would look great on you.
from agitated :
yah.. there's lo-fi and hi-fi too.. i would just DL the mp3 though
from raven72d :
Is it just an mp3?
from agitated :
hey i just appreciate anyone that would listen to it at all <3
from mixup :
dAmnit, I can't hear the song at work...it'll have to wait until tonight...
from justenough :
that song was beautifully breath taking
from raven72d :
I did mail a letter! It'll get there... I just have so little faith in the USPS about speed, though... Good luck on registration-- I always hated dealing with registrar's offices...
from agitated :
WHERE IS MY LETTER, IT'S NOT HERE YET! :)
from raven72d :
I don't really care about Buffy or Harry Potter...I only care about Lord of the Rings the way I care about books I've enjoyed. What I *do* care about right now is, ummmm...ummmm...finding Tare Panda stationery and/or finding some way to face '03 with a shred of dignity intact.
from raven72d :
30 Dec.02... Your latest entry strikes so close to home...
from mixup :
You go. The family you find is at least as important as the one you are given. We're here.
from sayit-asitis :
it's been a long time since i've randomly found a diary and actually enjoyed reading the entry. i loved every word of yours, i'm saving you as a favorite. take care
from raven72d :
The photos really are superb...
from inca-roads :
you are certainly not a lost cause.
from oobersugar :
meet me tomorrow night or any day you want, I have no right to wonder just how or when.... have loved your diary for ages. still love it. fab new layout. love, min xx
from emoxanthem :
merry christmas doll <33333 and good luck with the dad thing. parents can be so fucking stupid sometimes. *MWAH*
from chagrine :
we love you too :) & happy christmas to you (as happy it can get.. after all it's bloody f***ing christmas and it sucks).. don't be sad :)
from justagirl22 :
A little note of positivity for you. Laura Dawn is awesome! She's from a town 10 minutes from where I live. I'm glad to see someone knows her :) On another more serious note, the cutting and smoking analogy was a good one. It pisses me off so much when people don't stop to think about what they're looking down upon. Happy Jesus day.
from mixup :
thanks, sweetie. good luck at xmas. don't be too much of a recluse, ok?
from chagrine :
(((hugs)))
from mixup :
I am at least glad to see you're still around...chin up, ok? There are folks out here who want you to be happy and healthy...and while it sounds impossible now, you're strong enough to have made it this far; I trust you to get yourself out of this and not only survive, but thrive.
from jkookz731 :
hey...i was intrigued by your latest entry and decided to read almost all of it. ::claps:: on how well you express yourself. catch ya later.
from mixup :
GET OUT OF THERE....please?
from mixup :
Again, my dear -- fuck em. I think you're doing ok, if that counts for anything. (And to those reading this who sneer at pain -- Mental illness is an illness, not a character flaw. Do you think we wouldn't "cheer up" and "get on with life " if we could? After 42 years fighting this, I have only dimly begun to realize how distant my own understanding of "joy" is from other people's understanding of it. Fuck all y'all who think other wise. You will not understand. I suspect you'll be a thorn in the side of those who suffer forever. We'll just learn to ignore you. (L, you know how to get in touch if ya wanna talk.....)
from inca-roads :
i've added you as a favorite...you help me understand many things.
from mixup :
love the most recent entries...how are you?
from ambitious :
did you know that youre the best ever?
from justenough :
i ♥ that song (cute with out the e)
from raven72d :
Your Halloween photos are lovely. And your birthday card was there in my mailbox today... Many many thanks for that. I do appreciate it... And feel encouraged to write real letters...
from justenough :
yay! i'm a chicken up in a tree. mooo
from frostytouch :
I wrote about you in my diary, and I hope you won't be offended. I didn't write to upset you or anything. But I thought that if I felt strongly about it I should write it down. Take care. By the way if you want to see it, here's the link. http://frostytouch.diaryland.com/021125_12.html
from mixup :
Haven't had two minutes to listen to the song yet, but I will tonight or tomorrow...liked the entry today a lot...that duality is so exquisitely painful, eh? But dealing with the fact that you never feel completely adult is actually part of the issue of being adult these days...I have friends who have told me that they didn't feel grown up until one or more of their parents died. Sad but true, they continue to haunt us forever. So, hon, get used to it.
from mixup :
Well, HURRY UP! ;-)
from mixup :
I really like the song. When is the audio going up?
from lil-arsonist :
Thanks. :) I hope you werent offended by anything I said in the entry. I honestly cant stand ICP, but thats just my opinion. I was actually confused by this girls email, because what she had read was not rant about ICP, the band, itself. My peeve was that ICP shirts were allowed at school when Manson shirts were not. Its ridiculous! ICP shirts that say "Carnival of Carnage" and "Dope" are being worn at my school, without any occurance. BUT my friend wears a Manson shirt that says nothing more than "Marilyn Manson", and she is almost suspended! That was my rant. I wasnt saying ICP sucks, blah blah, blah... I was saying injustices in dress codes suck, and these are my examples. I think she completely missed my point though.
from lil-arsonist :
When did you start the Sylvia Plath ring? Ive been looking for a ring like this or one for the Bell Jar for so long, but could never find one! If I just missed yours, Im sorry. Thank you for starting it.
from mixup :
OK...you have no idea how glad I am to see you back here.
from mixup :
Ok, hon...where are you? Getting worried.
from justenough :
today, in front of a convience store, my friend erin said something like "i'm agitated". i smiled and replied "thats a really good diary!" ... yeah, i got some strange looks for that comment (yes, this really happened. thought you might be interested. lol) <3
from distressful :
hmm...has life been erased or just pretending? or no one can pretend? yeah, like the song, this is a dreary life and it's one and one only, the winner. but there are others who could stay up late and help a bit. or nothing. and i'm still losing it every time she breathes.
from justenough :
beautiful: diary & writing & girl
from and-e :
i left a note
from mixup :
Good. I recomment "Truth Decay" at maximum volume.
from shampain19 :
your diary is like a drug that i crave everyday. You totally kick ass and i got much luv for ya, good luck
from princesse69 :
nice reading!check my diary out.
from mixup :
STUNNING entry -- the mall explosion one...so much stuff going on. Reminds me of some of the dreams in liaklunk's dream diary (she's on my list of favorites). I'm always struck when people dream similar dreams...
from mixup :
LIZ PHAIR LIZ PHAIR LIZ PHAIR!!!!!!!!! One of my top ten albums of all time.
from mixup :
Go now, eat some food, get some sleep, and DON'T get a tattoo on an empty stomach!!! (Unless, of course, that's where you want it.)
from mixup :
Hey -- tell him. I suspect he knows already, or at least suspects.
from mixup :
Hi you -- gotta watch them older men... ;-) Hope you're ok.
from almostlegal :
Hey, just to let you know, there are new questions up and available for answering at Almost Legal! Feel free to stop by! http://almostlegal.diaryland.com
from mixup :
I won't be back for a while. But i'll still run SPEAK, and will remain here. And you can always write me.
from edksw2 :
yeh i don't know you but well feel better. Take a closer look in the mirror maybe you will see the beauty in your imperfections. The java Hut is a fun place.
from agitated :
SHUT IT i already told you i would beeatch.
from and-e :
ok u need to change or get rid of the pic of me on here, it is seriosuly the ugliest thing i have ever seen. please please change it. laterz
from shampain19 :
i love your diary!!!!! enough said
from raven72d :
But do you remember "Watch Me Bleed" as the first, darkest, and most ethereal Tears For Fears song...?
from mixup :
I think you can read dudleyroad. More inportant, I think you should. Let's talk about it in person.
from bendme :
you know, i really can't understand why the hell you'd damage yourself. you are beautiful, and very talented and truthfully, very intimidating. <3
from emoxanthem :
thanks about the layout :) and dont worry about the cd's dude...i mean, you sent them, which is more than you had to. have a good night <3 <3 <3 <3
from secunda :
oh, you're so cute. <3
from vitality :
i like you.
from raven72d :
Even if it was all rum-inspired, one should always acknowledge a girl afterwards...
from mixup :
dudleyroad: I want to hear you read this sometime. No, i'm not kidding.
from raven72d :
Sara Teasdale and Rose McGowan... You have a gift for setting up wonderful oppositions... And you say such wonderful things... I do treasure your attitude...
from secunda :
i know how you feel. i always see ugliness in myself. it's hard not to. [but i think you're lovely. <3]
from fraildolbaby :
you can sew it up but you'll still see the tear
from mixup :
love the polly jean quote...how are you?
from emoxanthem :
im leaving next monday for a think a week and a half but im not sure how long i will be gone....im actually starting to look foward to it :)
from emoxanthem :
whats the address you sent the package to?
from mixup :
Hey -- i'm back -- and if people leave you because you're trying to focus on positive stuff -- how fucked is that? Stay strong. We're pulling for you.
from emoxanthem :
i think the package got lost in the mail. so if it doesnt come this week, e-mail me your address and i will send you the money anyways <3
from emoxanthem :
thanks lauren! :D
from emoxanthem :
are you still going to send my CD's? i just need to know so i can get some money orders <3
from lousrose :
honey you ARE something. i wish you knew that. you're so gifted and nice; you deserve way much more than this.
from punkahontas :
hey, what hexcolor pink is that?
from emoxanthem :
grr do you have any thursday cd's? perry said all of her's scip, so she doesnt have them. if you do, burn all the ones you have <3 i e-mailed you, thanks again lauren
from emoxanthem :
do you have the something corporate cd? :(
from emoxanthem :
thanks :)
from emoxanthem :
hooow do i make a gif with a transparent background? :-\
from mixup :
"Prophetic", of course. Sheesh.
from mixup :
247 miles: this is lovely. Really lovely...I was reminded of some of the songs on PJ Harvey's NY album (Songs from the City, Songs from the Sea)-- a beautiful album, and eerily prohetic about 9/11 ("Kamikaze", for example). Keep it up...
from prink :
expectations are more than just evil, they're forever. fuck them! you know?
from mixup :
Hey -- really love the new layout! I won't be hosting this Sunday or next, so may not see you for a bit -- be safe, be well...
from fractured :
<3
from xtornintwox :
yo ...just wanted to let u know your diary thingy kix ass ...ur an awesum writer and your layout rox ..ur words are beautiful and i luv readin them ...thnx :) ~jen~
from mixup :
Y'know...you're not going back to school right away...you ar eplanning on taking the web design course...could you get a job and move out...?
from fraildolbaby :
"i'm pretty sure that dead boys probably don't wander around all night curing head colds for girls they used to like to kiss." i think that they do.
from mixup :
Nice to have you back. I like the new layout.
from harakiri :
Damn. I hope you come back soon.
from x-breakme-x :
i read your diary today and cried. you're so beautiful.
from distressful :
you don't need 'them' to be yourself, because yourself is better than the yourself with 'them'. dont' swallow the piece of courage you need because yourself does not need an enhancement to be true. you are true in your utter form. please, make it go away. you'll be more thrustful in yourself, the yourself withouth specific enhancements. please. make it stop.
from fraildolbaby :
i'm running in circles, jumping madly through these holes. all the whole i dug, all the drops i have created. the mirrow broke into a million pieces. did you hear me scream? did you feel me shatter? i'm feeling a little bit scared tonight, would you save me if i screamed a little bit L O U D E R?
from punk-loser :
thanks for joining the now i'm nothing diaryring... and awesome taste in music home skillit... [-CHRiS-]
from distressful :
it's another lonely day, with despair in my pocket. it's this the thing they call life? are we brothers in the deep end pool, sharpen as the knife that slowly cuts you, to let you survive and fall in disgrace again? are we alive for denial and misuderstanding? are we here for being raped by uncommon souls, that need us to satisfy their inner pleasures? are we here to strip ourselves and be loved again and again by people who only care about their inner pleasures? i find myself bleeding again, as my pleasure is no longer a point. we're brothers indeed, in a crucified soul apart. i need it so badly and my conscience fails to understand. are we brothers in pain? i feel it just like you. and i find that the knife is holding in my hand. the denial i wanted to feel is caused by me, in a glorified way. in a physical way. it falls apart like anything else. i adore you badly.
from brokenwords- :
im sorry to hear that. i'll be thinking about her .. :(
from a-d-d-i-c-t :
hey i like almost all the same music as you. no one has ever heard of the kidney thieves, except for me, and this one boy i know in dallas. theyre on tour with kmfdm i think.
from lousrose :
hey hang in there, I know how it feels :( you can email me if you want, moms never seem to understand.
from pussycat666 :
hey, i just saw rasputina in concert... wow.. can we say amazing? and orgasmic, and a plethora of other wow words.. :) i have one of melora's bowstrings! im very excited.
from bellaonahill :
"Lydia is co-editor of Sex & Guts Magazine #3!" i figured i'd respond to one note with another. thank you for the kind words. its nice to know people (at least some) see me like that. i can never tell how i'm perceived by others. but your words helped a lot last week when i was feeling down. sometimes i tend to feel forgotten, but knowing people like you care is wonderful. thank you.
from rotten-day :
no, it didn't hurt. um i just kinda shoved the thing in, and my parents couldn't get mad because they let my sister pierce her nose when she was thirteen, and i'm fourteen. anyway, make sure whatever you pierce it with is clean clean clean, and...yeah. put ice on it for a while so it can go numb then stick the thingy in or something. doesn't hurt if you make it fast. anywho, take care and good luck. <3 rachel
from autumnal :
a fellow masshole? (said with cheek) my, your words, break something in me. you have inspired me to be honest about soemthing. thank you.
from emo-anthem :
you know on your old templete how you had the little stars as links? and when you put your mouse on a link it would say something in the status bar? whats the codeHTMLcrapnessstuff for that?
from mixup :
We missed you sunday...
from pussycat666 :
i dunno if youll read this.. ( i read all {one} of my notes! tee hee) but you rock my world and i dont even know you.. kay not in the scary stalker sense but in the fact that you know who veruca salt and rasputina are.. email me,, please! ([email protected]) and/or im me: we can discuss music .. PLEASE... GoddesseOfMagick (thats AIM) if you dont have that id you have icq or something email me and i can let you knwo my stuffles for that.. thats all for now. ta ta!- oh and watch Harold and Maude.
from mixup :
wrong -- you are special, unique, and interesting. others have/will benefit from knowing what you go through. if you choose to leave the diary behind, that should be a choice based on what you want and need for yourself...but it shouldn't be because you think no one's reading or paying attention, because we are.
from rainyskiez :
what happen?!? I can't get through to your diary! ::cries::
from sharpsecret :
argh [email protected] i miss ur diary!
from mixup :
That sounds like a really good, really powerful experience you had -- life altering. Stay with it. We're pulling for you.
from fraildolbaby :
Fly away, sweet bird of prey Fly fly away Nothing can stand in your way Sweet bird, if you knew the words I know you'd say: fly, fly away
from mixup :
I think happy songs are fabulous too.
from mixup :
yup, that was me -- which one were you?
from lostinheaven :
You are <i>so</i> interesting. I really mean it.
from mixup :
Is ther anything I can do to help? I am worried about you.
from fraildolbaby :
i am weakened by your smile, slaughtered with your kiss. left alone by your removal of that once found bliss. and who could blame you for going away, who would not have gone astray. but you've broken my heart and left me sore. broken me apart and found me begging for more.
from brokenwords- :
thank youuuu =) you are wonderful, lovely lovely diary <3
from entity- :
/me bows you have seen many horrors and yet stand. For this alone accolades are deserved. But rarer still is the fact that you haven't yet yielded to the shadows. Keep fighting, there are those who want to help, just as you do.
from barenaked500 :
I like this layout...im happy you picked it! ;o)
from meepmeep :
Laurahn!, Hatin' on Gangsta Chris... leave him alone, he's already shot himself in the foot and trust me, he will have a horrible life, so you leave him be.
from softwhisperz :
your words astounds me. so much feeling on every single on of them. how i wish i can write like you *softwhisperz*
from mixup :
you sound rough -- going through a rough time, what in the old stories was called the breaking of the bands around the child's heart -- the moment when we know we are grown beyond our tender years. It does get better. Faith. Be strong.
from fraildolbaby :
by the way, i think your diary and website are gorgeous.
from fraildolbaby :
sometimes you just have to wonder what the hell any of us are even fucking doing here
from mixup :
hiya -- thanks for the kudos on the diary...I host the Sunday night JavaHut reading...
from mixup :
hey -- cool diary/site -- I run a poetry reading in worcester; ya'll ought to come by sometime...
from itsdorkrock :
i adore this.
from chagrine :
well... i hate to repeat somebody else's words but: you are beautiful :)
from barenaked500 :
this layout is to *pretty*
from me-whoelse :
hey, I really like Leah Andreone...you quote her a lot..I know I sound like a dumass, but I would love to talk to you sometime...you should email me or [email protected]
from ego-trip :
you are beautiful
from medicated :
i really like your glasses.
from cheekin :
comebackcomebackcomebackcomebackcomebackcomebackcomeback
from mensa :
the mailer daemon says your inbox is full :(
from valida :
is that picture of you? /curious.
from meepmeep :
Journal is wonderful, as was webpage... pretty much everything you do is.
from crashintome :
<3<3<3<3<3<3
from valida :
lately there have been time spans of at least a week between times when i hurt myself. i think i'm getting better, and i know you have the courage to. be strong. <3
from valida :
the heart picture on my diary is actually on my thigh. i understand scars. <3
from dne :
a few months ago i started writing a song which is of the same subject matter you spoke about today. only somewhat. if you're interested drop me a note. not that i would expect you to be interested since you don't know and might sooner believe im just a jerkoff who's either intending on sending you a really badly recorded mp3 or something i didn't even write. that's all good, i wouldn't leave a note without expecting some kind of judgement this is a diary website after all, and your shit is none of business. nonetheless, you might think it's ok.
from dne :
im trying to say something thats not shallow or thereputic like most of these notes are. or ask questions or offer advice or say things that will put you out of place. but i find this to be too difficult since i dont know you so im going to end this on this note.
from mysanctuary :
HI! :) U referred me here by the note u left me, I emailed u about yr password to the star-no-star account. Anyhow, this DIARY ROCKS also! I LOVE ROSE MCGOWAN!!! hehe I love JOJ & probably other things I can't think of. lol This is also going on my fav. diaries list. ~*Greta*~
from piilu :
happy birthday!
from sussitta :
Hi. :) I fell inlove with your diary and website. You're a layout genius! Anyway, I was wondering if you could give me a p-word for your p-word protected diary. Mine is, too. And I'd love to give you a p-word for it. That is, if you want one. Just leave me a note telling me if you'd like one. :) -Sarah
from barenaked500 :
Keep the surveys coming!!!!!
from valida :
boys are big meaniepants.

also, fuck anyone who tells you there's a line between prude and slutty. set your own boundaries and don't be ashamed; you'll feel better if you don't live by other people's standards.
<3 sam
from leandra-star :
i left a message in your guestbook but hey erm yea, i think that you are breath of fresh air in a long time. my email: [email protected] or just note me. it would be cool to hear more bout ya. see ya there!
from ktkat8771 :
hey!! i was readin your pf thing and you seem pretty cool!! we listen to most of the same music and stuff like that!! haha ok umm..well..i can't sleep either but ok!! ttyl!!
from dragana44 :
Hi! I was just looking around and checked out your diary. Very nice one. I especially like the lyrics to one of my fave songs, Strawberry Gashes (by one of my fave bands, Jack Off Jill{!!!!}) you have on your profile. See ya around... -Lisa (dragana44------>)
from valida :
oh, you're gorgeous. <3
from whenufuckher :
i love this. you're beautiful.
from chagrine :
big thanx! I guess the entry was the other one :) I just need to re-read them :) Have a great day.
from xmyheart :
i don't think you'll regret cutting your hair. it's understandable. i'd go bald if only they'd let me.
from chagrine :
I love your diary. Take care. :) And one thing: You had a really good entry about the girls who are proud to be depressed & fucked up. I can't find it, you have so many entries. :( And so many like this but the whole entry about the issue... can you help me find it?
from crashintome :
whee! thank you =) xo
from hiddenscars :
i read. i haven't been reading that long, but i think you're groovy. <3 sam
from heartshaped :
thank you for listing my diary as a favorite. mwah. i dig your place as well; beautiful layout &pretty words. mmm. keep on keepin on. i will be back. and take care. and xo. :)
from angstrom :
welcome & thanks for joining my DEFTONES ring again. wo0-ho0!
from cinmx :
hey, its all for the love of chino! j/k...you are an explosive writer. u are beautiful.

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update April 6, 2020: Sorry, we just had 8+ hours downtime due to a server problem. Restoring from backups took soooo long, but everything is back and no data was lost. Ay yay yay! Anyhow, hope everyone is well with the virus stuff.

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