DiaryLand members area

Mary. I have absolutely no right to ask anything of you. But I'm gonna do it anyway, because that's the kind of horrible person I am. My concentration is shot to shit and my inspiration has gone to hell. I need a layout, because I can't return without one. And I'll wait forever for an answer, so hurry before I forget how to type! *Remember how much I ♥ you!* xox

from slayne :

Did I do anything at all to inspire such feelings? Cause if I did, you have to let me know so I can do it more often. Otherwise, we all heart you waaay more. We? What? Sleep deprivation does nothing for my sense of style. x♥x

from slayne :

I know something happened, tell me what happened! And stop procrastinating and update already, we all love you too much for this kind of thing! xoxo

from slayne :

I need a new entry, darling, to help me along with the fact that your life isn't as dull as mine. ♥

from tuesday-10th :

Mormons piss me off too. There's a house near mine that's owned by whoever ships teenage Mormons over here to try and convert us, so they come around alot and try to teach me the ways of the Lord. I think people would be a lot more accepting of them if they weren't so scary. The last couple (two guys) walked in step all the time, and said hi to you at exactly the same time...scary Mormons. Oh, and also, being a 'bitch' doesn't hurt other people half as much as trying to be nice all the time hurts you. I've become quite a bitch recently and people get over it pretty quick. *hugs*

from poisontree :

I know how you feel: I'm sick to death of being taken advantage of/being a pushover/ bending over backwards for others and getting nothing in return. We're just cursed as far as having friends goes, i guess. <3

from angrystarlyt :

Well, honey, no wonder, what with all that stress! It may sound obvious, but...why don't you just drop a job or something?

from slayne :

You are beautiful. Never means as much when it comes from someone you can't see, does it? *sigh*... Have you ever wanted to take a trip to Seattle? It's never fun when you go with someone you know. x

from lotr-girl :

Hey,glad you're back :) I love the 90s too.wicked cool.I still have a few episodes left to see though-they didn't mention Kurt's death?wow,I thought that was such a staple for the 90s. Well,have a nice weekend *Katie

from slayne :

*GASP* My Mary! Love, you don't know how I've missed you. u: no p: more x♥x - And doll - don't you EVER leave like that again!

from ptassie :

hello again. thanks for the nice note. was good to hear from you. i know what you mean about the BMI. it's totally ridiculous, but i compare myself to that standard anyway. bah humbug. have fun at the beach and don't take any of your sister's crap. beat her ass up, it'd serve her right. toodles ~ Cass

from the-nicoli :

Darling, I would love to kick your sisters's ungrateful ass. I can't believe she still has the audacity to use you as her punching bag--for crying out loud! I have your number, just not your address, but maybe sometime I can...uhhh...ride my bike down to wherever your sister is and whip a little Kung Fu out on her ass. Except for the riding my bike down to do it part, I'm serious. Like if your sister was right here next to me I'd be kicking the shit out of her for you. Not that it would make your relationship any better, unfortunately...but I wish I could help. Really. ::HUG::

from ptassie :

mary!!! i'm so glad you're back. i was actually really worried :\ like you, i haven't been on Diaryland for a while, but i'm back now too. we seem to have made our comeback together..... how odd

from soxfarxgonex :

mary!! ure alive! yayayayayay! alas i have switched diaries...this is rae btw...lassofskye...coz yeh the other diary woz givin me a loada rubbish and i just had enough...so here i am and there you are! alas, someone i KNOW who updates! yayayayay! plz dont wait another two months i dont know if i can bear it!! *huggles* xx rae

from plastikcharm :

Where did you go? Your missed...

from everloving :

thanks for the heads-up about your diary, its much appreciated, i'm not sure when you left it, but i just found it now. anyway, thanks! :)

from ptassie :

happy 18th birthday for 15 months from now!!!

from neuroticaa :

jesus christ - you're 18 now? weren't you just 15, like, a year ago? seems like i've known you forever. (don't ask me why i'm a senior and only 17.) love you & have a good birthday okay? i mean, i'm happy that you were born. ♥

from poisontree :

Youre 18 now??? HAPPY BIRTHDAY girlie!!! *maria*

from mandywarhol :

aww that's so cool. now i really am kicking myself for not going to the july south street show. how did you buy the dvd, i thought they only sold it in the UK capability? ♥Red

from ginko :

i want the dvd! new jersey sucks and nobody has it!!!

from eol :

i'm so jealous i can't even speak. :P i hope you're doing better, i worry about you ya know! we're a rare breed, us glam rockers, we can't afford to lose any! stay beautiful darling! namaste -beck-

from plastikcharm :

Not true that not one person would care if you hung yourself...I would. And I know that doesnt mean much because I am just a stranger but Im sure your parents would care as well, they just dont know how to handle things and so there emotions get all screwed up and they handle it by anger or trying to act like nothings wrong. Yeah, that probably doesnt help either but I just wanted to tell you hang in there mmkay? <3

from neuroticaa :

that's so cool! i've always wanted to work there but never knew how to go about getting it. you should tell me more details - if it's the one close to me.

from the-nicoli :

You'll be in a Renaissance Faire?? That's so damn cool...congratulations!

from poisontree :

I've locked my diary. If you still would care to peek at it, here's the username: poisontree & password: catatonic

from zigglett :

hehe i really didn't think it would be as freaky as people reacted. i just thought it'd blink while they were reading and just sort of confuse them. haha, well yay for creepiness.

from poisontree :

Sex is a strange thing. First off, it's incredibly overrated. However, I am very very glad and relieved that I am no longer a virgin. My views on sex are really strange becuz i've never had sex that was euphoric. I think i'm just not a very sexual person, who knows! So, maybe you shouldn't listen to me. But yeah, don't feel too bad about being a virgin. Your time will come soon enough, i'm positive:) ***Maria***

from modified :

mary- please tell that old guy to leave you alone! no one should invade your space like that! i wouldn't let anyone ruin one of the few places and times you enjoy in your week! talk to him, and then talk to a supervisor! mod

from zigglett :

I LOVE MARY! :D xo happy president's day [since vday has come and gone ;)]

from lotr-girl :

Hi,I know you wrote an entry on the following things a while ago,but it took me some time to actually note you about it-I am also home schooled.I Hated public school with such passion.I dream of being an actress as well,even though other people see it as unrealistic.And I too live in a crappy ass town with not a soul that I can relate to.I thought I'd share that with you since it's yet more things we have in common.Later, *Katie

from tool-nin-fan :

May I have the user/pass again?

from drunkencynic :

If I didn't know better I'd say we were twins. Well, except for the LOTR part, but I'm willing to overlook it. ;) Trade you passwords. [email protected]

from poisontree :

thanx for the nice note re: me and the boyfriend. it was very much appreciated:) i wanted to tell u, i have some pics from the Placebo show that i scanned. i just need to find a disc to save them too and then i shall email them to u and Red! So, be excited!-->maria*** ps. glad your updating this again:)

from reefers :

can i have your password pwease? ^.^

from reefers :

my brian and richey fans!!! ^.^ :::jumps::: keep up the entries!!

from slayne :

We are in the same boat I believe... if I here the world "bizarre" in the same sentence as my name one more time I might just have to say a bad word : )

from acuttersedge :

Thank you. Great diary. Keep writing.

from zigglett :

aww!! messages like that make me love ya this much more *opens arms out wide* :) thank you for the layout compliment, i hadn't gotten any word and was wondering if it was total shite or not ;p -xo mere

from lotr-girl :

Hi there,you're welcome.I just happened to stumble upon your profile and I noticed that we liked a lot of the same things.and thank you,I love the lord of the rings,Elijah and Dom along with the rest of the cast.Your diary is cool,I'm digging the checkered pattern.*Peace out*

from neuroticaa :

it's definately worse to be lonely when you're surrounded by people. whenever you get the small town blues take a bus up and we'll dance around new york for a weekend :). speaking of which, don't you wish the manics would hurry up and release tour dates so we can know for sure if they're coming here! if they do, like i said before, they're definately going to play nyc, and every manic fan on the east coast is going to come, and every person there is then coming back to my house to crash after the show and it will be such a party. so look forward to that! <3

from slayne :

Oh dear lord, what's the problem with them? See, I have this... less than functioning piece of antiquity for a computer so... Oh blah. I'm fine though, considering. Okay, a little down in the dumps but I'm not complaining. How are you? How's the carepackage coming? : P I shall talk to you sometime soon, love. beXOXsafe

from tool-nin-fan :

May I have the password?

from acuttersedge :

Your diary is brillant. *nods* You seem very nice. haha, Sorry a bit drunk and I couldn't really come up with a word better then "nice". May I add you to my favorites list? Hang in there Kiddo.

from neuroticaa :

same as before. username=neuroticaa, password=upthewall <3

from poisontree :

hey. just wanted to say that everytime i IM you i seem to screw up yr computer and get you signed off. I'm very very sorry about this. i'll try messaging you sometime when im back in school and using a different computer. i apologize again and sorry for any inconveniences!-->maria**

from woahtotally :

I don't know if you read me but i locked my diary. Username - rockstar Password - PennyLane. Thanks

from poisontree :

Thinking too much fucks me up as well. I'm probably my happiest when i dont think and just zone out to music/some other distraction. So yeah, maybe the key to happiness is thinking less. Hope you had a happy Ex-mas and merry New Year. Love~>maria**

from slayne :

Happy New Year's Forgetting 2003 Day, Mary. It'll be different this time? Hehe...

from reefers :

i love you my im name is manicstretprechr talk to me ~stay beautiful~

from neuroticaa :

happy christmas, lover!

from poisontree :

I wouldve appreciated a Richey party!! PS, hope youre feeling less-sick today. Love~>maria***

from the-nicoli :

Hey, about living for your obsessions...I definitely know what that's like. I probably wouldn't be alive today if it weren't for music--Dream Theater in particular. I find it pathetic myself, but there are probably so many people just like this that it almost doesn't matter. It's the people with perfect lives and perfect friends who don't have to feel pathetic, but I guess I'd be resentful towards them because they HAVE it all...eh. I'm meandering. About LOTR, though, I finally saw it last night--HOLY FUCK!! It was awesome...the part with Pippin singing almost made me cry too, and I'm NOT outwardly emotional like that...it was most disconcerting. But the actor who plays him (I'm so bad with names)--I wonder if he sings professionally outside of acting? Because if he doesn't he, SHOULD. Good god. That's got to be one of the sweetest male voices I've ever heard. The accent just makes it even cuter. I must get the soundtrack so I can hear him over...and over...and over...and yeah. I'm talking too much. Anyway, hope you're well--later! ::HUG::

from neuroticaa :

i'm really upset that your sister ruined ROTK for you. <333333

from poisontree :

Youre such a sweetheart. i hope you know that. And i really hope you got to see Return of the King today and that it was great! love~>maria***

from darkness16 :

oh yeah... I'm so jealous u saw Placebo ... ::pouts:: everyone else saw them but me... :( ... tehee ... lucky u

from darkness16 :

hey hun... sorry it took so long to respond ... I never check my notes ... thanks for leaving me your username and pw ... Still love ya ... ::hugs::

from poisontree :

I simply cannot wait to see your pics from the show. I had a wonderful time and it was an absolute pleasure meeting you as well as everybody else!! I sincerely hope that you felt the same and that we can do it again sometime! and yes, Stefan hit on my boyfriend, how crazy hot is that? Love~>maria**

from neuroticaa :

Hi Mary!! I just wanted to thank you for [again] adopting me into your little circle of darling friends for the night. I had the most amazing time. The more I think about it, the more I regret not buying those condom-lollipops to throw on stage :) LET'S DO THIS AGAIN SOMETIME, MMKAY?! *muah* you're the best

from blueyeddolly :

ooh i hope you have a lovely time! have loads of fun. loads and loads of it. i want to hear all about it when you get home. :)

from poisontree :

Hey, just wanted to say thanx for your kind thoughts and well-wishes:) cannot wait 'til Saturday! Dont worry, i'll call as soon as i get into Philly. soon->maria**

from slayne :

I have just gotten your note, and of course I still read and I appreciate you welcoming me to continue. You are beautiful.

from poisontree :

the majority of yr last entry=welcome to my world. can't wait 'til Dec. 13~maria***

from ptassie :

oh, and thankyou thankyou thankyou for introducing me to Hedwig. i simply love it!!!

from ptassie :

of course i read your diary!!! wait, that sounds..... wrong. hmm. oh well, everyone else does. i try to read as often as i can anyway, but with no computer at home, tis hard. just wanted to say that i hope your mum will be ok and i really liked your pics. you little cutie!!! *pinches your cheek* :P i can't believe you've been hiding from us for so long. and by the way - your glasses are to die for!!! when i got mine this year, i wanted ones like yours, but they didn't sell them. made me sad. i had to settle for purplish brown ones, not quite as thick, still love them though. i'd better go now, because my ass is freezing to this chair and my fingers are going numb. ta taa

from rawxchicky13 :

i just can't take not being able to read your diary. of course i read your lj, but its not the same. your the only diaryland friend i have that still updates on a regular basis, and i look forward to reading yours whenever i can :)

from candy-flip :

Thanks sweetie. <3

from pretend- :

Thankyou very very much for leaving me your password! Your diary is still the only one i follow completely. Have a wonderful day. -huggles-

from prettywaste :

thank you for sharing your password with me. i love your diary, but have been short on time and havent had time to read it recently. Anyhow, the username for my diary is "get" and the password "fucked". (: <3christina

from plastikcharm :

Could I pretty please have the password?

from molkolover :

hey baby, how could you doubt me and my readership? i ALWAYS read you, every day - without fail. thank you for the password. i love you so much, and miss you lots and lots. b xxx

from ginko :

hey, doll. thanks for the password.

from sugarcorpse :

Hey, thanks for the password. And of coarse I still read you, in fact, you're one of my daily reads... Wow, I'm such a stalker. <3<3<3

from sugarcorpse :

Hey, thanks for the password. And of coarse I still read you, in fact, you're one of my daily reads... Wow, I'm such a stalker. <3<3<3

from eol :

thanks for the password darling! and of course i still read you! i also intend on zipping down there and wisking you away from suburban hell... as soon as i figure out a way to do that for myself... stay beautiful (ps. you are very cute! i love those piccys you took!) namaste -beck-

from woahtotally :

I do still read you. Very much so. Thanks for the password.

from his-boy :

also I relate to your last entry.

from his-boy :

thanks for the password.:)*hugs*

from katharos101 :

Could I please have a password? *hugs*

from neuroticaa :

mary! shame on you! you're my daily fix! no shit - i read you every time you update. how's that for creepy? i hope everything's okay.. thanks for the password. yeah i used to get that paranoia allll the time. <3love

from nervously :

Of course I still read you Mary, you big piece of silly! I just don't let you know as much as I should! Thanks for the username/password.... Hope the paranoia escapes soon. We all have it occasionally. Love youu!

from poisontree :

Hey. I just wanted to let you know, that i am now officially going to go see Placebo, so hopefully we'll get a chance to see each other there! so yeah, lemme know if you'd like to do a meet-up or something. lately i've been so terrible at IMing people, so feel free to IM me sometime! ps, i have a "things i am thankful for list" in my diary too, but i wrote it out before i saw yrs, so i hope you dont think i'm ripping you off. it's just some weird coincidence!~maria***

from fourlfclover :

hi. you seem cool, i like your diary...you kind of remind me of myself in some ways, but also different...Francesca Lia Block is the coolest...i love that book...

from fourlfclover :

hi. you seem cool, i like your diary...you kind of remind me of myself in some ways, but also different...Francesca Lia Block is the coolest...i love that book...

from neuroticaa :

agreed. pills should die.

from woahtotally :

Just had to say that your pictures were very pretty and lovely and do you buy NME because recently the hallowed pages have been graced by beautiful richey posters...

from neuroticaa :

THOSE ARE THE CUTEST PICTURES EVER. i'm in envy of your styyyle. i'm so sorry to be a pain in the ass but could you drop me a note on whether or not you got those philly tix for me -- the only reason i ask is cause if not then i'll get them myself, no problem - i just need to know so i can get them before they sell out and all. hopefully this'll all work out perfectly :)

from griinch :

Gorgeous! Your pictures are so pretty! Wow. (Sorry, just thought I'd share.)

from his-boy :

I've locked my diary.username=cleo password=love

from blueyeddolly :

dude, i almost went to hipster homecoming. ended up at cornerstone instead. glad to hear you had fun. maybe some time in the future i'll get to talk to you in person. how does a hipster dress by the way?

from blueyeddolly :

yes, it's me. thanks for the compliment. there was a small poster of richey edwards in my issue of NME, and it reminded me of you. i wouldn't have known who he was. he's really beautiful. thank you for spreading information.

from deaddesire :

right. note to self: do NOT drown self until AFTER sexually assulting MSP. . .

from his-boy :

If you ever see Micheal pitt give him a kiss for me and I dont know..I think you better capture him or something.

from pretend- :

-hugs- I'm so glad you had a wonderful time! I wish I honestly had that much fun, I can't remember the last time I did.. or if I even had. Oh well. Keep on truckin'! -manda

from neuroticaa :

it's not working on IE (god dont you hate that feeling?) but it works on aol fine. which is odd. and thank god; i need my daily mary fix!

from his-boy :

I like your last entry.You giving details made me feel like I was there.Glad you had fun.

from griinch :

Aw. You and I are in the same boat for homecoming... Just remember to have fun with the friends you're going with. They want you to be there. As for everyone else, you don't have to see them again if you don't want to. So your choices are to either blend in, or dazzle them. Shine tonight!!! -x-Kristen-x-

from pretend- :

Hang in there hun. Email me at [email protected] if you wanna talk. I wish i could take away all your pain and replace it with happiness.

from ginko :

thanks for the comment doll.. its kindof funny cuz i wrote that after reading your diary. i wish i could tell you that i feel the same, but we both know that i couldnt possibly. lets plan a day to switch places. ;]

from neuroticaa :

gah, honey, i can't see your journal. must be some funky html thing. maybe it'll work if i go on aol..

from eol :

i'm sorry chica. i wish i could come there and fix everything. but i can't. i'm stuck in ohio, wishing. just, please know that it will get better. it will. i don't know how, and i don't know when. but it will get better. think of jack fairy. he got beaten up all the time. but.. somewhere there are others quite like you... please keep up hope. namaste -beck-

from pretend- :

Thanks for the music ideas. I've been trying to dowload everything from Kazaa but for some reason or another it's being stupid and I've only managed to get a few good songs... I realy liked the manic street preachers, Bright Eyes and Pixies! I was also wondering if you have msn.

from pretend- :

It's sorta nice to know some one reads my diary.. and like it? I would have never imagined, but i guess it's possible. Your diary is pretty much the only one i read n e more. I used to have this huge list but when i came back from my trip your's was the only one that I wanted to read. I guess you should be given an award of some sort for pretending so long. I guess I'll have to make you one. -ponders- soon.. soon. -imagines up an award fit for a..err... teenager- manda

from deaddesire :

*glomps* we should bug each other more. I love when you bug me. And we should DEFINATELY seduce the manics with our BD skills. maybe in their hypnotic state we could get them to PLAY A FUCKING SHOW IN THE US! (*cough* okay done now). And yeah, maybe we should captivate Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom while were at it and get them to make *our* version of PotC2. oh, yes, I definately like that idea.

from dor-fk :

hey. i read your diary sometimes and i feel like a sneaky spy because i never leave notes or anything. you seem like such a cool girl, and im sorry you're so sad. one of my friends was suicidal and she told me this, and, even though it sounds really corny, its probably the best thing i've ever heard: you have to remember that in the end its going to be okay, and if it's not okay then it's not the end.

from out-of-tune8 :

Dig your name and i have to say i agree...I don't know if this counts so much but Johnny Depp- Pirates of the Carribean..Very hot!! :)

from ginko :

hey doll.. i hope everything works out for you in yer new school. o and if i were you, id definately go to the circle school. the other place sounds like nazi camp...

from the-nicoli :

Hey, just browsing your profile after having taken a survey you happened to answer on...I just randomly clicked on your name and I was amazed at how some of the things you said were exactly what I was thinking...kind of cool. and your profile is cool, too. I think I'd better go read your diary now...i'm so curious. ::grin::

from molkoism :

Hey, I love your taste. And you sound a lot like me. Hang in there.

from neuroticaa :

hi sweets, quick question. do you still do html help for people? i have this design i've been trying at but i can't seem to get it right. i know you've got lots going on right now, maybe drop me a line when you get a spare minute. <3loveyou

from deaddesire :

YAY! another RENT obsessee! Definately all for the screaming of RENT. me and my fellow rent-rats from high school were supposed to jump on the tables at lunch one day and burst out into it. bu we never did. and that's sad. :(

from eol :

*sparkly huggles* it's good that your parents are getting you out of that school. maybe this time medication might actually help. i hope things work out. stay beautiful babes. namaste -beck-

from woahtotally :

I watched Hedwig last night. Just had to say WOW!! As the world's number one Hedwig fan - just thought you'd be the bestest person to chat about it to! There are some parts that i didn't really understand. But what a *totally great film*!! Thank you for bringing it to my attention darling...!

from blueyeddolly :

just hang in there a little while longer, kiddo. You have to take two steps back before you can take a step forward, so make highschool one of those steps back and make whatever you want the other step backwards, and make your days as a famous actress the step forward. You have to hit rock bottom before you can get up. Just don't give up on me or moreso, yourself. just keep plowing through and see where all this mayhem takes you...

from slayne :

We have fewer friends than we imagine, but more than we know. [Hugo von Hofmannsthal] I guess some things are hard to see.

from blueyeddolly :

If you liked Valley, you should try to get your hands on a copy of The Exhibitionist. It's marvelously trashy. And its similar to Valley, only its a male perspective on the female mind. Its interesting. I loved it.

from plastikcharm :

I really wish you were feeling better about everything, your hurting makes me sad <3<3<3

from scorpionkiss :

dope,guns,fuck!ng_!n_the_streets. {revolution} <3333333333333333333333333//eva//

from ginko :

dont worry doll. everyone gets sick from anestesia. or at least all the cool people. i did too lol i had to stay in the hospital for like 2 extra days cuz i couldnt move. hah. ttyl dolly.

from gasolinecrab :

just writing to say i'm back and updating my diary!

from poisontree :

Hey. sorry, for some reason everytime i mean to IM you, yr off before i get around too it or something else happens and we dont get to chat. i can be pretty lazy w/ IMing people, so please, if u ever wanna talk, don't hesitate to drop me a message. i still think it would be most cool to hang out sometime before the summer ends. ssoon-->maria**

from plastikcharm :

You shouldn't apoligze for whining so much or lock it just so people arent subjected to it, if they hated it they obviously wouldnt keep reading. The diaries for you and its one time when you CAN complain, so whine away my friend.

from lolasavage :

That's one fantabulous diary you've got. Oh my....Drop me a note.

from deaddesire :

wow. that's fucked up and wrong. *shudder*. *sigh* sadly, I guess that's to be expected. . .I mean they *are* a band. . .

from eol :

what. the. hell?!?!?! the universe has just collapsed..... manics selling over priced mass produced hideous popular clothing!? *weeps* namaste -beck-

from ptassie :

hey mary. today was the day that i sat down and read about a month's worth of your entries because lately i really have been busy, and then i ran out of internet hours. and i like to check up on you and make sure you're doing ok. which you obviously aren't at the moment. i'm so sorry to hear that lainey was such a bitch to you, that sounds really awful. i don't pretend to know how much you're hurting, but it scared me to read about your "cutting incident" as you called it. i had one on those a couple of weeks back and it terrified me, i was just sitting on my bed practically howling because i thought i was going to bleed to death amongst other things. i haven't cut since, but i've really wanted to. i hope you can find some strength yet. (P.S. - sorry to sound so preachy) ~ Cass

from mrsjamesdean :

hello, thank you for the note, you are very rad yourself :) bush is a totally stupid prat. hope all is well! ~Angela

from leely :

i lovelovelove your layout!

from candy-flip :

Hey, hun. I just noticed the pic in my journal is no longer working. Can it be fixed? Thank you!

from poisontree :

Hey. really sorry to hear you arent doing too swell:( if its any consolation, and it prob. isn't, i have been having a pretty bad week as well.also, even tho im pretty sure the last package u sent me has unfortunately been lost(damn postal service!), i will start a package for u anyways. and i'll email a list of my cd collection, once i have it typed up. One day, things will get better for people like us who suffer from extreme lonliness. it just has to! much luv, maria**

from plastikcharm :

I'm sorry...that sounds like a terrible night :(

from ginko :

hey doll... it seems as though yer having a much better time in california than ive ever had, or will have for that matter. one day, we should go to the cosmo store together cuz it sounds really cool. plus, i love gay men and clothes.

from patched-soul :

if you knew how similar we are...and i mean that in the least psychopathic way possible. a few people were scared of me in knightsbridge, it was rather amusing. now all i need is a dress and high heels and someone will attack me. much adoration - rhett

from patched-soul :

hello mary.

from justthatgirl :

...hi. do u mind if i add you?

from blueyeddolly :

mary, I know it seems so meaningless to say because I've never met you and I've never talked to you outside of this little box, but I care. I've worked my way under your words and have infested you without your knowledge or your consent. I won't apologize for that though, because your writing keeps me going. And that's selfish as fuck, but I just keep thinking that if you can keep waking up even if you do feel so down, then so can I, and maybe we'll both be able to outgrow this or move on or do whatever we need to do to be happy and feel fulfilled and make our own fucking music. Originally, I just wanted to let you know that I cared. And I really, really do. I'm not going to say "oooh cutting is bad, you silly girl, stop doing that if you know its wrong," becuase I'm not stupid and I know you're not stupid either. And we both know razorblades can be better than any drug. We've got our own addictions that shrinks and meds can't take care of. So maybe, if you want, you'll keep writing and waking up and so will I, and if you want we can meet on the other side when we make it out. Y'know? I have the overwhelming feeling that that didn't make any sense. But hopefully the important parts stuck out. Its not possible for me to count as much, but I do count, and so do you, and because I count I can say that someone DOES care. I want to be able to run into you on the street someday.

from indie-snob :

Hey there! I just added a review for a Placebo show I saw a couple nights ago and thought you may be interested. I have a bunch of other concert and album reviews here, too. Check it out, thanks!

from scorpionkiss :

amazing amazing brilliant brilliant &&& infinitely more pretty adjectives for you. [!!!!]

from ptassie :

that concert sounded so incredibly amazing. i hope my concert (i know it's not technically mine, but i kind of feel selfish about the whole thing) is as lovely as that was. i want brian's pick too!!! maybe i can convince my boyfriend to stand in line and wait for hours. i hope i can. maybe if i whinge enough. oh i'm so excited now. i think it's finally hit me. i don't know how i'm going to be able to concentrate at work. it's going to be impossible. does brian still have short hair??? he still looks incredibly cute, but him with long hair just does it for me. i guess i can't expect it to have grown much longer. oh well, i'll stop babblng now, i could go on for hours. maybe i should stock up on lollipops :P ~ Cass

from griinch :

Can we start a club for people with Brian Molko's plectrums? *grin*

from candy-flip :

It was the most amazing night of my life! Placebo, that is. Oh, I love this band so much more than I ever thought I could. They put on such a great show, and they seemed ecstatically happy the whole night. We got lost on the way, and I thought that we were actually gonna miss it, but to my delight, we did not. :D Anyways, I made a big long entry about it, so yay!

from neuroticaa :

check your email silly! now!

from wearefaeries :

I'm so, so, SO happy for you! That's so fucking awesome. Like totally rad, yo. Kick ass. I want details! -Ali aka Blueyeddolly

from candy-flip :

You met Placebo! Argh! This is me jealous. :p I'm seeing them in only two more days, and I am so excited about the whole thing. Woo!

from deaddesire :

im so excited for you to see Placebo. (oh, well and me too.)

from my-last-word :

rawr.. i do quite <3 ur diary, especially the whole placebo obesession.. mmm.. saw them last year and the year before, they were *fantastic* stay good. xx

from eol :

darling, it's yr diary, whine all you like. what's the point in a diary if you can't whine? *hugs* i wish i could say something to make everything be all better, but unfortuantly i'm not the best person to be giving advice. i hope everything works out for you. namaste -beck-

from so-fake :

i wish you wouldn't cut yourself. =/ *hugs*

from rawxchicky13 :

eww, the driving laws suck here too. But you can legally get your permit and 14 and 11 months. BUT, you have to go to four all day driving school classes before you get your permit and these classes cost money and then you get your permit after you finish the classes. Then you have your permit for six months then finally you can drive. But you can only drive with some one over the age of 21 for six months. (no one really follows that law though) then finally, you can really drive. But I haven't done ANY of this yet, my mom i live with says she doesn't want me driving till im 18. eww? I THINK NOT. I just need to scrunge up some money, and a job. Hmmpph.

from eol :

*HUGE HUGS* i hope everything goes well and she doesn't make you go back to that therapist. good luck darling!!! stay beautiful namaste -beck-

from plastikcharm :

Oh dear, I wish you LOADS of good luck, you're so brave to give that to your mum, I couldn't do that. But I just hope everything goes well...

from slab-sex :

Your diary is absolutely gorgeous. A Hedwig theme with only pictures of John Cameron Mitchell and Michael Pitt is brilliant. You also have fabulous tastes, my dear.

from glizamrizock :

hello! yea, i was just talking to you, but you left! and now im lonely...you know what i realised, we are like the same person, it's frightening. in a good way. THE CURE!

from ptassie :

hey it's me again. just wanted to say happy 16th!!! yes, i know i'm late, but i don't have access to a computer every day anymore :( anyway, congrats on getting your licence, i have mine too, but i'm in australia so i have to take like a tonne of tests until i'm fully qualified to drive. it sucks. ahh, to be 16 again. no wait, 16 wasn't that great. actually it sucked. sorry, you probably don't want to hear this. but i did get my first tattoo on my 16th birthday!!! that was fun, although i nearly puked i was so terrified. ok, must be off. bye now ~ Cass

from poisontree :

Woah! where did yr parents find this Hipster's Handbook at? I want one! congrats on getting yr license:)-->maria***

from eol :

happy birthday dah-ling!!!! *mwaaa!!!* i hope it didn't suck too too much. *hugs and glitter* stay beautiful namaste -beck-

from deaddesire :

happy birthday! even if it might suck. . . and cars? cars suck. i am offically never getting my license when i can have other people drive me around and not have to pay money for insurence and all that crap. anyways, i hope however the car thing turns out, it makes you happy. . .

from plastikcharm :

Hey have a wonderful birthday, I hope you get a lot of cool stuff.

from griinch :

Have a wonderful, glitter-packed birthday. Don't worry about getting your license. Most people don't pass the first time anyway. Just remember to calm down, and appease the instructor, whose probably a bastard anyway. Take the test earlier in the morning, when they're less pissy. Might be worth a shot. Good luck. -x-

from pretend- :

Fallon was hot.. yumm. Well anyways.. yah I"m going to Australia next friday 8 days away were going up the east coast.. Brisbane and Airlie Beach and i think down to sydney afterwards. I'd just like to wish you a happy birthday and goodluck with the insane lil cuzins and the drivers test. Eek when i turn 16 in sept. I can actually go for my liscence.. now that's scary considering I'm very unresponsible.

from deaddesire :

ah! i just watched hedwig agian the other day, and i got all wet eyed and emotional during midnight radio. I always forget how poigniant that scene is until i watch it. . .

from pretend- :

I know you didn't reply before and most likely won't either.. but i'd just like to say i saw that episode also. <<Meet my Folks>> and was disapointed when Fallon got kicked off... i wish he AND pete could have stayed. It sucks that it was a be continued one though, i wanted to know the end.

from deaddesire :

I lurve Bowl of Oranges. . .definately uplifting for BE. I wish i could have seen him on TV. . .

from pretend- :

I just found your diary and happened to read that your mom makes you go for yearly checkups. SO DOES MY MOM! lol... they suck. I think i found your diary looking for people from Australia... correct me if i'm wrong. I'm going there in 15 days! Leave me a msg.. if yah wanna.

from saxifrage :

we never think we'd end up like this. We think we'll grow up and be happy and have fun and in my case long blonde hair (?) and then we dont and cant figure out who we are or what... yeah. We're in the same boat, sugarplum.

from woahtotally :

*kisses on the cheek* you do have friends...

from ginko :

when are you going to see placebo in new york? on july 7th? cuz thats my birthday, and i think i am going too!

from deaddesire :

are you me a year or 6 months ago? cuz I believe I have had that exact same discussion with myself. I think i must have realised that the people around me didnt care so I stopped doing things to get their attention and focused on trying to get it so that people did care. But your situation could be entirely diffrent. good luck, however it turns out.

from frostie13 :

oh darling your diary is so beautiful. i hate how scars look in the light its wierd how they seem to stand out so much more around people, well i love your diary and i can relate darling<3 and christina ricci is hot well hope to read more soon <3 renee

from astera :

it's good to be brave, and better to be strange. my best friend in high school cut herself. i can still remember sitting on the bathroom floor when we should have been in class, holding her when she was crying. she got better, i think. we don't talk anymore. on a more lighthearted note, this is astera, a sister, and do you like orange soda?

from lovely-tears :

heyy, thanks for taking my survey! =/ well i'm glad you aren't ******* currently. and i hope your life goes well, i read ur profile n u seem soo awesome. yea im 15 in like 2 months and i'm still trying to igure out wat i wanna be, but don worry i wont 'copy cat' you lol. u just seem so smart.well yea, tootles =)

from ptassie :

Mary!!! i have the BEST idea!!! i swear, you should move to australia. you could fly and run run til it hurts, sleep for a while and speak no words!!! seriously though, me and tanija would adopt you as our friend and you could live with us, (totally free of adults) and we could wallow in our obsessions forever (works out nicely because yours are virtually the same as mine). although i'm not sure how tanija would manage with two manics-obssessed girls in the house. she'd never hear anything else. except placebo. :) but we have so much in common, and i can totally understand what you write. i may have never met you, but i swear we were destined to be friends. hmm, this sounds very stalker-ish. maybe i should leave now. but if you ever feel the urge to come to australia, let me know and maybe we could meet. i need a friend who understands too. meh, i can dream..... Cass

from poisontree :

Don't worry about not having any friends in yr general area. I have hardly any friends either. It sux, but then again people suck as well. I've been having a hard time lately as well...unfortunately things don't seem to get much better once your out of school. Sorry:( If u ever need to talk, u can always try calling or emailing or whatever. I guess we both need to just learn how to appreciate our lonliness. maria**

from neuroticaa :

very rarely do i lock my journal but once in a while i will -- username= neuroticaa, password=upthewall / <3

from apocalizardn :

things are only as bad as you let them be. i'm not an optimist, and i'm not a pshychiatrist, it's just how they are. i've learned that you are the one that makes your life, nothing outside of that pertains to anything. bills, rent, assholes, clowns, nothing. i wish for you the best, if you ever need someone to scream at once the numbness is gone, feel free to scream at me (oh, and bring those fishnets...snoogans!)

from xsidewalksx :

hey there. we seem to like the same things in a way so i thought i'd leave a note. // friends can be found.. true friends don't leave.. just bid your time. wasn't that cheesy? ha. sorry.

from scar-ling :

I want to fuck your layout. Up the ass. Repeatedly.

from blueyeddolly :

hey kiddo, I think the whole teen angst is something that's going to follow you around all through highschool. It's part of the conforming nature of the experience. I don't mean to sound condesending, I'm just trying to let you know that its baggage for everyone, including me, its just that some of us, ie: me and you, have a tougher time dealing with it because we don't want it. (wow, long run-on) We don't want it because we know we're better than that, y'know? Or atleast we hope to be someday. Just don't let the man get the best of you now, you've got to go through all the bad shit to get to the good. And the more conflict sounds better in a biography, and who knows, when you become famous and stuff and you're hanging out with all of your fav bands because you're a hella rad actress you'll have all this shit behind you that you can spin stories about. it'll work itself out. really. and maybe you should start shopping around for new friends... your current selection doesn't settle well with me. and you've got the whole summer ahead of you, get a job, go places and meet people if you can. be independent, highschool relationships are bullshit. you're not going to give a damn about anyone you know now ten years from now. do/be/live who and how you want, y'know? yeah, i'm done now. lucky you ;-)

from poisontree :

Cute new layout. Hey, i got the CD and pin and clipping today. thanx so much. and the note was so nice. it def. made up for the lateness! if you ever want CDs or anything, we can trade again. and it would be great if we could meet up over the summer. Hopefully we can chat again soon. if not, feel free to email me/leave me notes whenever. and of course u can always try calling, altho calls do not go thru when people in the household are on the computer. but feel free to try anyways! luv, maria***

from ginko :

i love love love love love the new hedwig layout!! yay! ...jackie..

from eol :

you need to come to ohio so we can hang out. i'd be yr friend. we could be weird together. darling, liesten to me ok? you are beautiful. i don't care if you don't think you are. you are. you are a beautiful human being. i adore you simply from reading yr diary. you must be a thousand times more radiant in person. these aren't just idle compliments with no feelings behind them. i'm not just trying to make you feel better. you are a special and unique human being. and who gives a damn who thinks otherwise? i know it's hard to believe and even harder to put into action. but you are wonderful, please never forget that. namaste -beck-

from poisontree :

please let me know as to whether or not you have sent the package you were supposed to send me in return for all the lotr clippings i sent u. if u get back to me, i'll email u this really incredibly adorable manics pic that i had never seen before tonight! ~maria**

from slayne :

I wouldn't want to suffer the wrath of Mary... her and her Brad Pitt Wax Butt Pinching skills and all... hehe

from eol :

hey have you tried those curell scar removing pads? you put the pad on for awhile and they make the scar look less, or even gone. they have tons of kinds at my local grocery store. i saw them yesterday and thought you should know about them. they really do work. i tried one on my arm and it made it fade almost completely. i have to search to find it now. stay beautiful m'dear! namaste -beck-

from pcmotherdear :

Thank you for introducing me to maniac street preachers and placebo. im a fan now. *hugs*

from griinch :

Hiya, doll. Word to the wise: Don't see your counselor or the nurse about telling your mom about your arm. They'll tell her before you. I'm pretty sure its required that the nurses and counselors take stuff like that to proper authorities because its school. They aren't real doctors. They can't really help. (Maybe I'm a bit bitter because my own counselor betrayed me in a different way recently...)Anyway, I don't think anyone can really help like friends who understand what your going through, or people who've done it before. Counselors can be trained like puppets well enough, but how can they really understand? Anyway, I'm probably just rambling, and not really helping. I hope things turn out well for you. Take care. Love and glitter, -x-Kristen-x-

from slayne :

I wanted to let you know that everything on my stupid diary is fixed and caught up. And I hope you're doing really great..

from candy-flip :

"Frankenstein Girls Will Seem Strangely Sexy." That's the one I got. Looks like I'll be listening to it constantly now! :D I think I have a new obsession on my hands.

from neuroticaa :

hello darling... i was wondering, since i *Adore* your current layout so much, if it'd be alright if I used it for mine? I have my own bckgrnd image and things I'll customize myself, so it will look different than yours, but would you have a problem at all with that? i'd link back to you of courrrsse.. please lmk ;) **muah**

from poisontree :

Hi. i just wanted to ask: have u sent the cd you copied for me yet? i've been really busy as of late, and havent really had a chance to look for more LOTR clippings for u. sux that we dont get to talk online as much anymore. hope yr well-Maria***

from eol :

*hugs* it is so hard darling. i'm always here for ya if you want to rant and rave. remember: this does NOT make you a failure. it means you are human, you went four months once and you can do it again. just please don't beat yourself up over it. *huge hugs* please take care and stay safe. stay as beautiful as you are, and have always been. namaste -beck-

from apockalyptik :

Bowie, The Beatles, Smashing Pumpkins and Empire Records.. I am already a fan, dahling. Not to mention that your diary is quite nice =)

from viciousdream :

Hey, I've moved my journal to killerrabbit.diaryland.com. Just thought I'd let you know!

from blueyeddolly :

Have a fabity-fab-fab time. I'll be here, in central PA, being uber jealous. Mmm hot boys with accents... See the sites and have fun, fun, fun. If you run out of ideas just do the whole "winning london" marykate and ashley (attempt at a) movie thing. yeah. run around all crazy like and such.

from griinch :

Have a wonderful trip to London. I can't wait to hear about your fabulous adventures! -x-Kristen-x-

from destroyable :

Placebo were so f-ing fantastic!! Brian looked so cute. I didn't like Brians hair to begin with but it looks so much better in person! Brian pinched Stefs ass and kept winking at him.. I remember every detail!! I saw them at Sheff Octagon, where did you see them? They just were so fantastic. I couldn't get over how good they sounded live, amazingly I did doubt that they would be as good as the albums were. And I didn't expect them to play so much off the new album.. They played the Pixies- Where Is My Mind.. It was the best thing ever, cos I really wasn't expecting it! I wanted them to play either Nancy Boy or Johnny and Mary! How bout u? Live up to expectations? Nb love Tash xx

from eol :

i have had the guestbook, but i took it off for awhile cause people were being evil in it. i just put it back up though. :) namaste -beck-

from blueyeddolly :

sounds like you were watching the rock 'n roll hall of fame thing on VH1 or something. and i hope you got your delay. CV got one and then ended up going home at 12:30. Very rad.

from neuroticaa :

your. perfect. guy. list. rules. (it has Richey written [almost] all over it hehehe)

from poisontree :

yr almost finished my template? wow!! thats unbelievable! can't wait to see it!!!!!!

from destroyable :

Hey darling, it's Tash, went to see Placebo last night, and had the best night ever.. hows you lol? note back love ya xx

from poisontree :

hey. i know u wanted to ask me a question about my template. im really really tired and need to sleep, so could u please email me or leave me a note or get back to me some way? will try sending u clippings soon! ->Maria***

from thorazine :

raa you rawk. from your profile page i think you must be my twin or something.. hehe. so i added you <3

from eol :

hey chica, guess what i found? my lotr felowship movie promo poster. it's not in mint condition, but it's yours if you want it. sorry about the tickets, i'm sure you'll be able to fix it. just keep faith babes! stay beautiful, namaste -beck-

from psych0-wh0re :

sorri i know random notes are annoying lol, but cool diary. im new so im just checkin out pplz diarys looking for ppl with the same interests etc.

from duckykong :

OMG! one of your favorite movies is velvet goldmine. That movie is the greatest. I am so glad to find someone els who thinks it's great. Ofcourse I am a huge Ewan Mcgregor fan. Thanks for having taste. =]

from july-ette :

hi, i just noticed you like smashing pumpkins and placebo, two of my very favorites. the rest of your tastes are lovely as well, i can't get enough of lord of the rings! write back, but only if you want to xIriSx

from eol :

"we're dead end dolls and nothing's moving" http://image1ex.villagephotos.com/1877947.jpghey. you need to come up here, or i need to go down there (i need to go down there. nothing's up here) i'd be yr friend. yr cool. i wuv you!!!! ok.. scaring myself... but yea. we should live in the same town. we could richey and bri obsess together! stay beautiful! namaste -beck-

from poisontree :

Hey. i just wanted to let u know, that i looked thru some of my old mags and found a fair amount of little LOTR clippings i can trade in return of msp clippings or whatever you may have that i'd like. so, lemme know if yr still interested and ill send them when i get back from Ohio. *maria* ps. i know how it feels to be 2nd to others. don't worry yr not alone.

from ginko :

poor thing.. i know exactly wat yer going through... u shouldnt worry because someday ull realize that some ppl are not worth yer time. feel better doll :]

from ptassie :

hey Mary. hope you don't mind i created a link to your diary through mine. if you do, just let me know and i'll take it off ASAP. ~ Cass

from destroyable :

I hope so, I'm too young for this, thankyou x

from scar-ling :

Oh, love! I totally completely and entirely understand. I'm going through the same thing--with cutting and burning and weight and wanting to stop and tell my Mom. And that only my obsessions make me happy. Honestly, your entry could have been written by me only I'm not as cool. All I can say is that... I UNDERSTAND. I don't know what else to say, unless if there's anything--and I mean anything--I can do, or you want to talk about, or ANYTHING. Do let me know. I hope things get better for you, I really do, take care, I love you lots!

from eol :

oh darling, everybody's nervous their first boyfirned! just think of it like this, high school romances are like dress rehearsels. they don't mean anything, but they are good practice so you have some clue of what to do when they actually do start to mean something! stay beautiful! namaste -beck-

from blueyeddolly :

"I don't know why I'm so scared. Maybe its entirely normal, and I'm just the only one my age who freaks out about it, or maybe I'm even more socially-inept that I even thought before ...See, this is why the only boys I love are actors and in bands" I'm 17 and I freak out all the time about that stuff. I can't seem to take highschool relationships seriously either. Give me imagination anyday I suppose. Good luck and Nike slogans are all I can offer. Don't worry yourself to death about it... this is one of those typical "go with the flow" type things. And everyone's a fool at one point or another during highschool. That's what makes it highschool. Cheers. It'll turn out okay.

from eol :

HEY! congrats on yr first boyfriend! he sounds sweet. stay beautiful babe. namaste -beck-

from palefaced :

hey mary! you probably don't know me but I've been reading your diary for ages, and I missed out on loads of your entries when I packed up and moved to livejournal, but I hear you're seeing placebo! yay! ^_^ so am i. Will you be at the brixton gig? If so maybe i will see you there. Have a great time in Engerland. *glitterkisses* x x x palefaced x x x

from ptassie :

hey Mary!!! just stopping by..... i missed out on reading all your entries a while back so i thought i'd catch up. *phew - wipes sweat off forehead* (sorry, i'm a stalker) but anyway, it sounds like you're not going too bad. congratulations on being an aunt by the way. sorry i'm a bit late on that one :P anyway, must be going now. i'm using up all my all my mum's net hours..... Cass

from ginko :

dont be sad doll.. i love you

from ginko :

dont be sad doll.. i love you

from dernhelm :

Mary, you're so honest and REAL in your writing. I love reading what you have to say. :)

from woahtotally :

Heya so where are you going to see placebo then? I'm seeing them in Manchester WOO!! Roll On April! Byeee! *mwah*

from nosecandi :

Dont you just wish sometimes you could be a guy, so you could be a guy in makeup? a yummy, glittery, glam rock guy? since there doesn't seem enough of em in the world. And by the way, nice diary!

from gasolinecrab :

hey!!! remember me? we used to write last summer. anyway sorry i haven't written to you it's been hectic central around here, quite madenning honestly. but anyway i remembered i had this diary and went and checked it out and decided i was charming enough in the entries i could keep going with out humiliating myself. lol. so how are you? i read from your entries that you were doing better, so that's pretty good. what else...i'm feeling very angry towards pop princesses right now just because i always am, but particularly now for some reason. anywho (who says that?) leave me a note on my diary and i'll see if you're interesting enough to keep around luvjessie by the way: i realize that you can't hear any intonation what soever when i'm writing words, but the last sentence was to be sarcastic. just incase.

from gasolinecrab :

from eol :

we really should live in the same town. it's not fair. how come all the people who would get along great are like, miles and miles apart. not cool at all. anyway. don't give up hope yet. only what? two and half more years or something like that? then you get to get out and go live on yr own. that's my only guiding hope... stay beautiful! -namaste- beck

from blueyeddolly :

Not your newest entry, but the one before it... the one about being used. It made me want to give you a huge hug. I know exactly where you're coming from, and it's one of the most annoying things to endure. Especially when the people in question won't admit to using you because they see themselves as practically "god-like" or something of that extent. Vomit on them. Don't let PA get the best of you. From your words you seem intelligent and street-smart, enough-so to realize that people are taking advantage of you. Don't go back on your words and stand up for yourself. As cliche as it sounds: if your current friends can't bare to respect your wishes and opinions, you can do better. Or something like that. Its been a long day. I wish the best for you. But no more of this suicide/cutting talk... its been overdone. You've got cooler things to do. It's all ice, ice, baby.

from scar-ling :

just called to say i love you. heh heh. actually, i cant get "motorcycle emptiness" out of my head, so i thought id come say hi. i dont make any sense. and im not on drugs. im just not making sense. haha. i love you!

from blueyeddolly :

I'm basically across the bridge from harrisburg. You?

from allthevirus :

Hello there... just reading your profile and I noticed we have alot of things in common (for example, boys in makeup, Lord of the Rings...). Nice diary, I'll try to read it as often as I remember (I'm quite forgetful *smile*)

from mylifeat15 :

Guys in makeup? Whoa! I saw one on Thursday, he asked me why I was looking at him (I wasn't) was it because he had eyeliner on? What is the answer to a question like that? Anyway, I'm here to wish you a belated happy Valentine's Day - love from your sister Elin

from p-brain :

thanks for joining yhe Gollum ring.

from philothea :

you have 3 degrees of separation between you and Viggo? Swoon. Congratulations on getting a role in the play!

from billyprior :

OMG :-x I forgot it was today - thanks for reminding me

from scar-ling :

Hi love! Thought I'd stop by to see what all the manic fans were thinking on Richey's day... :( I hope you have a nice day considered... I made him a little memorial too. Memorial for a great man who sadly went away. Awwh. Feeling teary now. *is pathetic*

from winter-child :

Hei! I just thought I'd stop by and say thankees for joining the Galadriel, Eomer, The Shire, and Valar rings. Nice layout! See you around.

from philothea :

Ooh, I'm really really scared! Come to think of it, there will be a long space between when the movie is out of the theaters and the DVD. Are you going to see Orli's pirate movie when it comes out in July? It's rated Arrr!

from snowymjb :

hey. um, awhile ago u asked me if i wanted u to make a template for me. well, if u still feel like it, ive finally decided what i want, so just let me know and i'll try emailing u the details, etc. it doesnt matter if u dont feel like it tho. ~maria**

from ptassie :

oh my god Mary!!! 5 weeks and 2 days..... i'm so proud of you. i wish i had your strength. you're awesome!!! ~ Cass

from silverjade42 :

thanks for joining the squashjosh d-ring. back to the chat!

from snowymjb :

ok, i dont like how i phrased the last part of that last note, so i'll try it again: it would be good if u would become a famous actress and proclaim yr luv of MSP, but its a shame more people dont know who they are and haven't done so already. there, i think thats what i was trying to say. o jeez, i think i've gone off the deep end....***

from snowymjb :

hey! well, if u ever do become a famous actress i'm pretty sure u will be the first (american, at least) actress to proclaim yr luv of MSP. i dont know if thats a good thing or not...... ****

from slayne :

Hi there. I hope you're having fun in L.A., and I hope your buddy doesn't find your diary. Good luck. Check out the IHOP on Sepulveda Drive, that place is crazy. In the mean time, stay happy. Rape lots of stars and get discovered. I'm fine.

from blinksalot :

http://blinksalot.diaryland.com Please come and get reviewed today!

from smockgirl :

I as well enjoy *ahem* yes... enjoy the new layout. Very well done! ;)

from dernhelm :

Ooooh. I LIKES the new layout. :D

from marieh :

welcome to the empirelovers ring and thanks for joining! i use the code rule to make all my rings function properly, so you don't browse onto a locked diary or a diary where you can't find the ring to continue on... so, that's my present to you!

from ivyvalentine :

LMAO! Oh Eru Jolene, uyou beat me to it, I get home, race to the computer and switch it on to see if anyone needs anything and ya beat me to it, thanks hun for helping me with that....but yes, you can mail me at miserythemalkie2hotmail.com with any questions about the notebook and to see if you want to join in!~Huge hugs~

from falling0star :

The info for the Travelling Notebook can be found under 'Current Projects' the the right side of the sisters' diary, but I've copied and pasted the relevant material here. Ivy can be contacted at her diary ivyvalentine.diaryland.com or her email [email protected]. Anymore questions?Don't hesitate to ask! "Project Notebook: The LOTR sisters, world-traveling notebook! Most of you know about this one, please send all addresses and five or ten questions you would like for your fellow sisters to answer to Ivy as soon as posible! I will post updates here! Aeryn will be in charge of transcripts once the notebook comes back to me! You may also ask her questions!"

from ravenheart :

Thank you for joining my Frodo ring, you are welcome!

from silverjade42 :

Well thank you for joining the Sauron, Faramir, and Eowyn diaryrings, dahling. ;)

from angrystarlyt :

That's not sad. I had a party for Tolkien's eleventy-first birthday there at the beginning of January.

from rawxchicky13 :

http://www.qulture.net/tests/movies.html im sure you will love a lot of these quizzes, if you haven't found them already :) good luck this week with finals, i have no luck hehe

from neuroticaa :

heyyy mary... love the layout! good news - i can *finally* see your entries... normally for some reason with IE nothing showed up so I had to go onto AO-Hell to read it. that's so funny about the keyboard that likes to hear itself talk or click or whatever - mine is like that too. omg you have to come to the movies with me because none of my friends like LOTR so i've gone twice so far by myself.. which isn't terrible but i so wish you lived near me. we'd be the best of friends. gotta go. love! <3

from philothea :

good luck with your finals!

from angrystarlyt :

Ahhhhh! Me too! You soul sister, you!

from plastikcharm :

Im glad I am not the only one who feels like that on the whole fantasy/dream things. *phew*

from clown-empire :

guys in make up are hot.....placebo rocks lol i recently found brian molko's online journal

from snowymjb :

Hey! um...yeah,i'd like it very much if u could make me a template! i dont have to have a gold membership or anything do i? becuz i do not have one of those. i forget what else i wanted to say, but thanx alot for offering!! i will talk to u later~Maria***

from eol :

it is possible for old scars to ache. the old ones on my wrist and shoulder do quite often, usually when i'm stressed out and/or wanting to cut. i don't know why. probably something to do with the addiction of cutting and broken nerve endings and such. but i don't know. only that it is quite possible. namaste -beck-

from goth-angel :

hey there, sister! I saw your recent post on the hobbit costume. Now, I haven't saw EXACT patters, but this site is so very helpful: http://www.alleycatscratch.com/lotr/Hobbit/Female.htm Hope it'll help you. Like your diary, btw. 'Liiiiij!

from psianina :

Hello fellow new Sister! ^_^ Your username sounds so familiar; I think I must've visited your diary a loooong time ago. VERY hot Elijah layout btw! And I completely agree with your Arwen comments. Movie-Arwen might've been good if not for Liv Tyler. But �owyn still would've been better. ;)

from loveisbliss :

I like your new layout!

from lassofskye :

jus wanted to say ure layout is wicked, elijah has the hottest eyes!!! they're so blue, almost like u could swim in them. hey thats my abstract thinkin for yah.

from smockgirl :

Wow. *lovely* layout if I do say so myself... and I do. Just wanted to welcome you to the sisterhood! I'm having a TTT withdrawl as well... so you're not alone! :\

from angrystarlyt :

Well, your last layout was gorgeous, but I like this one too.

from silverjade42 :

Hey there! I just wanted to take a moment to welcome you to the LOTR sisters! :)

from glizamrizock :

holy shit you are me. i love placebo, velvet goldmine, hedwig, guys in makeup (especially eyeliner and with long hair) nirvana, olp..and more than half of what you like. oh and my mom raised me on rocky horror, ive known all the words and the time warp since i was like...8

from falling0star :

You play Tig! Oooo!!! *clears throat* Welcome to the sisterhood, my dear! May you teach us how to make up silly rules so that we don't end up embarrassing ourselves in front of people we're trying to embarrass. *big hug*

from angrystarlyt :

Ohhh, guys in makeup are lovely. *lick lick*

from rlg1287 :

Welcome to the Sisterhood! *hugs* Its great to have you join!!

from tiffaroniroo :

Hi! My name is Tiffany and I'm also a new sister at lotrsisters. Just thought I'd say hey and cool diary! cya round!

from ivyvalentine :

Mae Govanenn sister! Like Abby, as co-founder I just wanted to welcome you to the Sistership! You can also mail me for the password, at [email protected] or also if you have any questions/ideas/comments etc! Welcome in!~Hugs~

from aviclark :

Sorry this took so long, but welcome to the LOTR Sisterhood! Our open diary URL is http://lotrsisters.diaryland.com, and when you're ready to post there yourself, just email me at [email protected] for the password, and it'll get to you faster than this approval did! :D Sorry again, and hope to see you there!

from candy-flip :

Happy late Xmas lol! And New Year! Hope you got everything you wanted!

from woahtotally :

Yeah...Penny Lane is just fantastic! As is her coat...(and I guess we both must be dorks then...cos I think it's amazing!) To think...I could be posessed by the spirit of my coat's previous owner...I could turn into Penny Lane!!! *wishes* Ha ha...Happy New Year

from eol :

happy ne years and all that rot. hope you have a nice year. hope you had fun getting drunk! namaste -beck-

from slayne :

Now I'M the one going through withdrawal! You can't be in London yet - where are you?! Bleh. Love ya and stuff, Layne

from orwellian :

since i'm on your favouties i thought i should let you know that misspicasso's diary is now at orwellian.diaryland.com sorry for all the changes. orwellian

from snowymjb :

hey sweetheart. Holy Shit!! yr going to London?!? and u got yr manics FD book already? gah, yr very very lucky!! hope you feel better tom. *maria*

from destroyable :

Hey babes, bck on diaryland after missing it like hell and eating waaaay too much!! Happy Christmas, have a great new year, love Tashy xx

from noisyghost :

thank you :)

from eol :

hey! congrats on london, i wish i could go. i long to go to london. everything happens in london. hope you see lots of cool people there. hey, i've a question to ask you, do you know where i could download any manics videos (especially you love us and love's sweet exile) withouth having to dowload kazaa, :D happy new year, namaste -beck-

from slayne :

I'm just so wonderful, everyone goes through withdrawal when they don't talk to me for awhile : ) ha. Anyhow - I'm trying to get in touch with you, but it seems as if you're on the phone... hm.

from woahtotally :

Oh wow! You will so love London! It's a great place. Manchester is great too...Happy Christmas! *stay beautiful*

from therowansite :

merry xmas sweetie! xxxx

from rawxchicky13 :

Yeay! merry christmas. Have fun in London. :)

from prettywaste :

Merry Christmas Mary. Have a good time in London :) <3Christina

from ptassie :

hey Mary!!! hope you had a nice christmas and got heaps of cool presents ~ Cass

from neuroticaa :

hi love. merry christmas <3

from molkolover :

I don't know whether it'll help you or not, but if you buy small holed fishnets or funky tights, you can cut holes in the feet and crotch and wear them underneath short sleeved tops. It's my clever little way of disgusing nasty arms and still wearing my short sleeved tops. And full length gloves work miracles. take care miss Mary and have a happy holidays. xxx

from billyprior :

Nice new layout but sad today is richeys birthday now :-/

from candy-flip :

I like your new lay-out. The pic is fantastic; I'm hoping to get some Francesca Lia Block books for Xmas. :)

from plastikcharm :

Congrats on seeing the new LOTR I still need to see it, hehe. And Im glad you are friends again with Laura and Cat. Anyway, just stopping by ^_^

from snowymjb :

Hey Mary!! we didnt get to chat yesterday...that was strange. anyway, hope u enjoy LOTR. im gonna see it in a few hours. yay!! hope yr feeling better. yr one cool chick. *ps. i really luv yr new layout, even tho it is a very very sad pic.:( ~maria***

from picklesx :

haha i thought that you actually were a guy in make-up and i was like HOLY SHIT!! I LOVE GUYS IN MAKEUP!! WHERE DOES HE LIVE ND CAN I HAVE HIM. but alas, another dead end. but when i read your diary, it was no dead end :) i really like the way you write keep it up hunny. youre wonderful. xo

from eol :

hey. i know exactly how you feel darling. please don't do anything irrational though. the world needs as many cool people as it can get. :D and since you're a manic/placebo fan, you're extremly cool. im me or email me or note me anytime you want to talk, trust me i'm bored all the time, i could use some entertainment. ciao babes! namaste -beck-

from chinadollrvw :

Your reviewis FINALLY up, I know it took me awhile. Anyway, thanks for submitting and good job!

from neuroticaa :

i finally have every single manics album. aren't you just so proud of me? in all seriousness, we should both together make a pact thing to stop cutting. its harder when you're by yourself, i find it easier to stick to a promise when you're in it with another person.. these past 2 weeks i have failed miserably at it.. but.. who knows. don't forget to IM me <3 Redd

from scar-ling :

Thank you Mary DAAAHLING! Awwh! I sure miss reading your entries... Whenever you change layouts, I'm going to read all the ones I missed. I'll make a day of it, really! Love, twiggy.

from rawxchicky13 :

Mmmmmm...red fusion. *orgasm* YUMMMM.

from scar-ling :

Hey! Just writing to say that due to unforseeable circumstances, I've had to switch diaries from http://perfectdrug.diaryland.com to http://scarling.diaryland.com, so if you really care, please come say hi. It's the same. I think. Love, Twiggy

from rawxchicky13 :

If you need to talk im here. If you need help im here for as much as I can do. Please, don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it. People do care. Whatever they or him/her did to you, you don't deserve it. Nobody deserves what your going through. Feel better..

from snowymjb :

hey sweetheart. im really really sorry to hear how you've been feeling lately. i feel like a mess and so so stupid sometimes and think bad thoughts and have hardly any friends, so i can relate somewhat. but yr right, people are stupid. im still totally looking forward to meeting up w/ u sometime soon. and, o yeah, if u dont want me to read yr diary anymore, just let me know and i wont. hope i was of some help to u~>Maria**

from ptassie :

hey mary. i hope you're feeling better. wow, that entry about not cutting deep enough totally hit home to me. i feel like that so much lately. congrats on your first kiss too. i hope it was as special as you wanted it to be. ~ Cass

from woahtotally :

mary...im really worried about you. I wish i could help. If you ever want to talk i'm [email protected]. I hope you'll be alright...*exits*

from woahtotally :

i'm really happy for you. congratulations!! i'm glad it was so special. *exits*

from griinch :

Wow, congrats on your first kiss! I'm glad to see you're happy (Especially after the last entry) -x-Kristen-x-

from noisyghost :

I'm reading your dairy as well as AMAZED at your perfect guy list... thing. You, my friend, have created the perfect male specimen. Such brilliance deserves to find him. :)

from worthlessl :

I don't know you but cutting isn't really an answer, though it most of the time helps... -Boy in make-up

from rawxchicky13 :

Oooh your first kiss, especially with a guy you actually like. Sounds scary, but I'm sure you will have a great time with it. Will sounds awesome, and again Cat is a bitch. Hope to talk to you soon. And im glad you are feeling better than yesterday.

from snowymjb :

hey!! just drank alot of this licorice flavored drink w/ the cute will boy here, and im not drunk, but i am very dizzy! it feels good! i like it:) i drank more than everybody else, and im pretty sure the other people were whispering about us hitting it off/understanding each other. ok, i know hes' not afraid of me now becuz he told me his room number and says i can come up sometime to see his smashing pumpkins videos!! and i played some msp for him and he said they "weren't bad." and his GF likes Placebo, esp. "every me and every you." wow!!! hope to talk to u real soon again. luv, maria***

from snowymjb :

hey! thanx for the very nice little not you left me. yes, it is always cool getting notes, esp. from sweet people like yrself. i've been trying to IM you, but there's no response, so i really hope everything is ok. i really hope to talk to u again soon. luv~>maria***

from ptassie :

hey thanks for the help. it works..... hurrah!!! ~ Cass

from neuroticaa :

hey again - go look @ my latest entry... you'll def appreciate it!

from prettywaste :

Hello :) Thank you for adding me to your favorites :) Your diary is awesome! (:

from candy-flip :

I just noticed that the pics in my diary, yours, and eol's aren't working. Is there some way to sort that out or something? I'm a little confused, coz that's happened to me before as well. Note me back. :)

from woahtotally :

thanks for my note...and adding me to ur faves and stuff...and i only just realised that ur american...it's so cool that you like all this obscure british music...very good taste! *Ps.Do you have the UK or US version of Generation Terrorists?*

from neuroticaa :

correction.. its cool that *we* like similar music... uh i'm just a little drunk, dont mind me... ;-)......

from neuroticaa :

Mary - you have wonderful taste. Thanks for complimenting my diary, i like yours as well... its cool like similar music. But dont you hate it when guys where makeup better than you? lol check THIS dude out! http://www.boomspeed.com/blackstar/hotguy.bmp

from destroyable :

Hey babe, thanks (this is for everyone who left a note to me) for saying that, it's so sweet that people care, in fact it's very supportive, I might take u up on that offer.. I love Hurt it's the kinda song you dont specifically want to listen to but when you do and once you've cried you feel reasonabley better, Trent has that effect on me.. Maybe me and Ant weren't right, I've never felt as strong about someone, but then I'm only young (and still a virgin.. argh) I seriously wish I wasn't though lol! I like u plan, I hate guys so much, thanks a lot babe I mean it. Take care xx

from ptassie :

hey mary. sorry to keep bugging you. you just obviously know what you're doing with this whole diary thing. i just tried to make a separate page for my diaryrings but i can't link back to it. and it appears as an entry as well. i tried reading the FAQ but it juts confused me greatly. could you please help a fellow manics fan??? :( ~Cass

from woahtotally :

Hey, i just love ur diary layout and everything about it in general! And Richey *swoon* is amazing, and the Manics are fantastic and so are Placebo...especially Brian Molko *swoon*... And i have so much to learn, cos im pretty new to this diary thing...so i dont supose i have any volunteers as like a guide for me? or something...i feel pretty lost! *totally*

from ptassie :

hey Mary, it sounds like you're having a hard time at the moment. try and forget Cat and the others. i know it's hard, the same thing happened to me a few years ago. but Will and Alese sound really nice. and good luck with trying to stop cutting. i'm trying to stop too, so i'm here if you ever need to rant. ~ Cass

from rawxchicky13 :

Cat seems like a bitch. So much for making conversation these days. At least you have friends who truly care about you now. Thats all that matters. :D

from m-a-n-i-c :

ignore that last one! its a netscape thing, it seems. *stay beautiful*

from m-a-n-i-c :

um, i cant see anything to read! maybe its just me. anyway, if you like the manics then youre ok with me!!!

from prettywaste :

guys in make up are the best. Right next to boys with mohawks. ::sigh:: Hah. well, i really like your diary. and. nice layout. ill be back (: - Christina.

from philothea :

Good luck stopping the cutting. I know how hard it can be, but don't give up.

from neuroticaa :

your layout is KICKIN. i heart richey, the manics are my favorite. hmm, i don't really know what to say in these things =/ lol feel free to drop me a line anytime!

from snowymjb :

just a "P.S" i was reading the song lyrics quiz survey u took~> I'll be waiting w/ a gun and a pack of sandwiches=Radiohead, Talk Show Host.

from candy-flip :

Well, if it was Nicky wearing the dress, I'm going to have to start calling him Nicholas, coz I like the long version of names better! lol

from destroyable :

I just read your diary, I know what you've been through, my sisters ex boyfriend used to go to a mental hospital (although everyone refers to it from where it is rather than what it is, out of shame? embarassment? hopeless feelings? I'll never know) but he called it Hell, he says if I know someone who's going to be sent or feels down enough to not want to be somewhere where people know them by name (not by disorder or mental state) then I should say they should resist what they're doing.. Please try. I've done it myself, height of summer, long sleaves, lots of childish plastic bracelets.. But I find the smallest things, even nothing, depresses me.. Mmmm try not to, I know how hard it is, how addictve each cut is, the rush.. Get addicted to something else(my weakness is caffeine) or the net, I'm addicted to that too.. Remember if u wana talk I'm always here!! Change ur diary, I'm glad I'm infecting people to get bored!!! Lol.. Love u loads Tashy xxx

from snowymjb :

hey its me again. hope im not pestering u. i know i dont know will at all, but if they want to send him to a mental institution just for cutting, thats pretty fucking stupid. i really cant say anything for or against cutting becuz i've never really done it, but im sure its better than doing drugs or something like that. don't worry, i feel the same way u do sometimes. it sux i know. its just this generation i suppose. or a certain clique in that generation. to paraphrase the first boy i ever had a crush on in high school, we are nobility.

from glitterscars :

Me again - just having a wee read of your diary. Why are so many people so miserable just now? It doesn't seem fair. I hope you feel better soon xx

from glitterscars :

Thanks for filling out my lyrics survey! You got 15/40, which I think is the best so far. I can send the rest of the answers to you if you're at all curious, but I will tell you that "you don't try to rape a goddess" is from Bluebell by Babes in Toyland xx

from bop-reviews :

You can find your review at http://bop-reviews.diaryland.com/guysinmake.html

from destroyable :

Thanks, I really like the rose too!! I just get bored so quickly and it tends to change most Sundays!! Virgin Suicides is the kinda book u wana read like a million times (I'm still not sick of it, I quote it to my friends) "What we have here is a dreamer, someone completely out of touch with reality", although it's on loan to my sis at the moment! Hehe note back, Tashy xx

from picassomoon :

hey, you know cutting is a bad thing, but until you find something healthy to replace it with, its your natural way of dealing with stuff. I have bad ways to deal too. I try to replace them with healthy ways, but sometimes healthy ways don't seem like enough, I know life is shitty sometimes, email me if you need a friend. ~moon [email protected]

from snowymjb :

hey. i just read yr latest entry in which u asked "how can anybody luv me?" or something along those lines. well, i'd just like to tell u that, i LUV chatting w/ ya online. its unbelievable that another manics fan lives so close and that we've got so much other stuff in common as well. so, yes, i think u r an awesome chick and i cannot wait til we meet up on south street eventually. ~*maria*~

from destroyable :

HEY! Yeaaah ur right it was Virgin Suicides, fave film, fave book, made sense, I've changed my diary again (I get bored easily u c) Mmm I like the rose, it's Rachel Stampy apparantly lol! Note back love u Tashy xxx

from okielion08 :

how can you not like chior?!?!?

from ptassie :

hey mary just a little note to say *you rock* you are a fabowous writer and i'm adding you to my fav diaries as i'm typing this. i can also totally identify with your issues (cutting, depression, food, friends) oh yeah and go the manics!!! wooo!!! i love them too. especially richey. *drool* ~ Cass

from leely :

hello. I just stumbled upon yer diary:D...is that Jackass movie good? L8er

from scorpioali :

we seem to have a lot in common. i like your diary.

from rckstrreview :

Your Rockstar Review is done. Thanks for waiting! http://rckstrreview.diaryland.com/guysinmake.html

from perfectdrug :

Hey thanks for the note which made me feel better! I shall check out the site you gave me! Well, I ended up ripping off images from the spanish placebo site. Not the ones I originally wanted, but pretty damn fucking pretty anyways! :) I still can't see your entries, though! Where are they? I can see the picture and the links, but no entries! Ahh! I shall go crazy if I don't see them sooN! :)

from diaryreviews :

Hello, this is Nick of Diary Reviews. I just wanted to let you know that your Diary has been reviewed. Please copy and paste the following link into a new browser window to view the review: http://diaryreviews.diaryland.com/guysinmakeu.html Thanks, Nick

from therowansite :

Hey. Thanks for adding me to your list of fav diaries. Yours is going on mine. Mmm Daniel Johns. GuyinMakeUp.

from perfectdrug :

Ahhhhh!! Maryyyyyy! I cant read your entries? where did they go? *looks around and screams again*

from jesup :

GO VINES! (ring)

from iconxglitter :

Oh god! King Adora were my favorite band in 8th grade, heh heh. They are (were?? I heard they were dropped from their label) sooo good and all. Oh well. Enough.

from billyprior :

I love how films are dubbed for tv too - the most notorious one here was when Die hard of something was totally slashed to bits with whole scenes missing and all the best dialogue dubbed over by a guy with a different voice so sometimes it looked like a bad kung fu movie. It did invent a new word though - MuddyFunster - which replaced a rather nasty insult and engaging in sexual relations with someones mother ;-p

from perfectdrug :

Awwwh! Thank you! :) I love your new layout, by the way! Mmm... I'm so sorry, I meant to write you back when my computer was all fucked, but I got a new one, and then forgot! I shall write you back as soon as humanly possible! :)

from therowansite :

Hey I'm totally on your wave length. I love Richey and am going to see the Manics on their Greatest Hits tour in December. I love the layout of your diary. I wish I could do that. I havent upgraded to gold yet. I shall be reading your diary as it updates... R.

from bhw :

If your freinds are Richey and James and rest of the Manics.....well then we totally hang out with the same group of friends! YAY!!! Nice to have you with us hehe Stay Fucking Beautifulxxxxxx

from candy-flip :

Thanks for the new diary, I love it to death! :D There's only one minor problem with it, and I've emailed you about that.

from eol :

ah... one of my favorite topics.. anarchy. i myself am an anarcho-capitalist. there are basically two types of anarchy, anarcho-socialism and anarcho-capitalism. there's also chaos, but that's what the sex pistols preach, and it's bollocks (no offense to any sex pistols fans...) for more info on anarcho-capitailsm go to anarchism.net which is IMHO the best anarchy resource website EVER. :D ok, i'll shut up now. hehe... but seriously, i could go on for days about anarchy.... stay beautiful

from molkolover :

i'm always being told to stop wearing stripey tights because they make my legs look fat - but i don't care and keep doing it. Wear whatever YOU feel comfortable in. Your outfit sounds really cool, i'd like a nurses dress. *mwah* b xxx

from bhw :

New layout is FUCKING beautiful!!!!!! Richey,Richey,Richey!!!!!

from rawxchicky13 :

Yea the layout is great. I ordered a manics book at borders and i should be coming sometime this week. Haha. Ok maybe I go into them a little to fast, but I really just sit here all day listening and downloading music, so maybe not. So when I get that book I'll send it to you sometime so you can read it. hehe. The 1000 calorie diet does work. But I guess if you don't like eating that much at first you can always work your way up there. ou know start little, then go big. It may make you more comfortable in what you are doing. Couldn't hurt in trying right? I bought myself sleeping pills and they seem to be working. Although I don't go to sleep until 11:30 usually, its better than going to sleep at 1 or 2 like I have been doing recently. But I have to take the pill like an hour before cause then it makes me drowsy and then I just fall down and sleep. Sleeeeep.

from eol :

I LOVE IT!!!! that is an amazing layout!!!! :D exellent job! namaste -beck-

from candy-flip :

Okay, I found the picture that I want. Just gimme your email address so I can send you the link to it, and my password. :)

from candy-flip :

Thanks for offering to make me a diary lay-out! I'm currently looking for a picture of Marilyn Monroe to use for it, so when I find one I like, I'll give you the link to it, so you can make me a diary. *yay* Also, I'll need you to log in to my account to put it up for me, is that okay? Just coz I'm really bad at stuff like that lol.

from billyprior :

1000 cals a day and excerising will be MUCH better for you. My mam once had this diet where you split days into green days and red days and i couldnt do it cos i had to eat to much and it was pure hell! Thing is though it actually worked! Oh and i love the previous note! Congrats on converting people! Keep up the good work!

from rawxchicky13 :

heylo. I have a confession to make.Hehe. When I first start reading your diary a while back I didn't know who the manics were, but thanks to you and your daily rantings about them, I do. I think they are awesome and I have you to thank for it. If you lived here in San Diego, you would have lots of friends cause you seem like a really cool person. We would have fun. Heh. So hang in there, high school sucks, I know, freshman year was hell for me, but it will get better. Your friends ar being arseholes, but if you ever need to talk just IM me. richey is gorgeous......

from gasolinecrab :

bonjour my friend from the dark world! everytime i read your diary, even though it's usually very lonely sounding, it cheers me up SO much. you can describe the exact same situations, feelings, and opinions that i have but don't know how to say. so YES, i'm not alone. i wish i knew you in real life, because my best friend Adrianne is a lot like us to. if she gets a computer i'll get her to make a diary so you can see how similar you both are. anyway, don't perk up, we just are the way we are, and when you're rich and famous you can send some bitchy girl ten dollars with a note that says 'seeing as you probably don't have shit, here's some from your old 'pal'. we can send the letters to our respective brats on the same day. yes!!! luvjess

from eol :

don't off yourself darling! life's a bitch, but hink, after you get out of the hell that is high school you can move to london (or new york, or san fran, or whever you like!) and you'll meet nice freaks much like you and you'll be loved and accepted. that's what's kept me going through these years. remember.. just four more years (three for me) hey, if you're ever pissed off and want to rant to someone, or obsess about the manics or placebo or VG or priscilla queen of the desert or anything like that, feel free to im me (i have yahoo mess. but i can get aim if that's what you have. i've no preferance. i've been meaning to get aim anyway...) well stay beautiful babes! ta! -beck-

from candy-flip :

Don't feel bad, I have a favourite Spice Girl. ;) It's Posh Spice.

from billyprior :

As much as I hate to quote Buffy when I could be quoting someone slightly less embarassing I really do think she was right when she said 'The hardest thing in this world is to live in it' It takes guts to off yourself, but it takes even more to live and change your situation for the better - weakness is wallowing in self pity. I know - I do it all the time.

from candy-flip :

Justin Timberlake is going solo coz everybody knows he's the cutest boy in that litle "band." I just had to say that. :p

from angrystarlyt :

Oh, *no*, man. I was just passing through your diary for a peek, but what your friends are doing to you is totally shit. Fuck them. Be *however* you want to be, and if anyone decides they need to have a little "I think we'll tell you how you need to act" thing than forget about them. Be yourself!

from incoherence :

hey dahling, your new profile stuff is great ;)

from potatoboy :

I just started reading your diary and I like what you have to say. I hear you talking about calories and stuff and just out of curiosity, how much do you weigh?

from molkolover :

oooh thanks for the note and the advice. I tried the dark purple feria a few years ago and it did absolutely nothing to my hair but I thought i'd give it a go just in case. All hairdye hates me so i'm considering shaving it all off and wearing a nice wig. *mwah* xxx

from revoless :

I just sleep when I want a vacation from myself. Suicide is for when you think you're incapable of ever being or doing anything, not for when you want a break. Sleeping is taking a break. Stay awake through school, come home, and head straight to bed. That's my advice. When I can't do that (insomnia. grr.) I focus on one thing. Usually not eating. If you let one thing consume every thought in your mind, you'll no longer be yourself, and can then take a little break. You already seem to want to, after all. But. I have a question. Why do you want to stop eating? I know everyone has their reasons, and I was just wondering if you've thought about yours. One last thing: negative calorie foods are mostly a myth. The only thing that burns more calories than it puts into your body is ice water. Negative calorie diets work because they're low calorie. Stick to veggies and it's basically the same thing, really. Anyway. Meh. Stay beautiful.

from candy-flip :

Yes well, it seems to be by far the best quote I have ever come up with all by myself. So I am quite proud of it. But sometimes I'm a little too clever for my own good lol. Ah.

from gasolinecrab :

since you seem to like the same hotties i do, do you think Haiden Christiansen should be married to one of us soon? (and by us, i mean you, because you would shoot arrows at me if i won) and don't you think his hottest moment was when he cried in Life as a House?

from gasolinecrab :

jimmy fallon is the cutest ever. he did an impression of the naked chef (my other favorite hottie) and i went into a seizure. your website is my life, just well-written. keep writing, we all really appreciate it!

from gasolinecrab :

from griinch :

Thanks for adding me as a favorite! I feel so loved now... Plus, I now know there is another person in the US who likes Placebo and Manics! And I didn't even have to tie you down and force you to listen to them. Other people just suck. Where was I? Oh yes. Thank you! -x-Kristen-x-

from candy-flip :

Hello, doll. Oh, I get so excited when I get added to people's favourites. It brightens up my day! Plus I love to find people who have the same tastes as me, coz frankly, there are none where I live. I'm gonna add you to my favourites now!

from gasolinecrab :

i was trying to figure out how to add you to my favorites! tell me would you? my favorite block book is probably Weetzie Bat. Oooh, something you'll appreciate; i wrote to her once, and she sent me this whole letter back. like signed, and actually responding to what I'd asked her, not just some mechanical thank you note. So if you write to her, most likely she'll write back. I'm thinking of getting a gold membership so my site will look better than a dinky half off original price site, but I don't trust myself to make financial decisions. Should I just put in the man-hours and learn html, or should I spend the money on the goldmember site? if you know anything about this, that is. ooh, plus two more things: if you have yet seen hedwig YOU MUST, two, read Walk Two Moons by Sharon Creech, it has my all time fav word: huzzah.

from gasolinecrab :

it was the girl with bandages episode! i've been telling everyone about it too, but only the part about the woman with tin foil. it's fab that you've seen it too!

from perfectdrug :

I would love to explain it to you! I'll email you soon if you don't email me! :) Ahh, Hedwig. I've seen that movie (and Velvet Goldmine) waaayyy too fucking much. I'm actually just about to go watch it! Peace! -twiggy

from gasolinecrab :

i just sort of stumbled blindly on to your site and i'm SO GLAD I DID! I love the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Francesca Lia Block is one of my all time favorite authors. I'm fourteen, turning fifteen in a few months. I'm glad to see my kind of crowd actually inhabit this empty cyberspace.

from perfectdrug :

Ahhh, You're so cool! Hehehe. And I'm a fucking loser. Yayyyy for guys in makeup and glitter! -Twiggy (the sleep-deprived and superhyper)

from billyprior :

Tried the bathtub thing - it doesn't work but it looks pretty ;-p

from bhw :

Hey, I love how you make past etries show like complete "Yes" song. I don't know if you understood what I just said but, anyways I ment that your diary is amazingly MSP! Stay Beautifulxxx

from incoherence :

since im such a nice person *coughs*,yes,lets share him dahling :D xox oh hes so gorgeous! *faint*

from forleafclovr :

Welcome to the my band sucks diaryring and thanks for joining! ~Lindsay~

from eol :

hehe.. it's ok that u mentioned lotr movie.. hehe... since you're so cool and linked me in your diary, i'll forgive you. :-) i still haven't mastered the art of html good enough to link things properly or anything. i know how you feel about school. i'm dreading going back. well, ta ta! keep on being so damn awesome! -eol-

from perfectdrug :

Hey there! Man, you are damn fucking cool! I love your diary! Everything you like, I seem to like too, and I can really relate. (Do I sound like an annoying fan?) Okay, appy-olly-woggies, but I just thought you ought to know. -Twigs

from palefaced :

yay, another person who appreciates guy is makeup. AND your a placebo fan.......very cool, anyways I like your diary alot, and I remeber being here before but this time I'll go add you to my list. ^_^ *glitterkisses* x x palefaced x x

from molkolover :

aww, thank you for the lovely note. I'm gonna add you to my fave diaries too because you seem to have wonderful taste and be a lovely person. *mwah* becca xxx

from incoherence :

why hello dahling. i think i remember stopping by your diary once! thanks for adding me! your diary also rocks. *runs with wings to go read yer diary*

from phoenixchild :

I just read your answers to my survey and I might just have to list you in my favorites. I thought *I* was the only person who turned LOTR into something of a Rocky Horror. No costumes, though, because I'm broke... but mine is complete with yelling at the screen ("Shire? Baggins? But that would lead them here!" "NO SHIT!") and throwing things. I often re-enact the scenes (I can do a full one-woman show with absolute perfect timing, I've seen it 15 or 16 times). I also enjoy making fun of Elrond and I say "MISTER Anderson..." every time he appears onscreen. I also have a lot of fun when he says "You have only one choice..." But I won't go into that. Also I admire that you like guys in makeup. I saw Velvet Goldmine last night (I feel like a bit of an idiot, I couldn't even figure out what decade it was in--whoever wrote it was obviously smoking something) for the first time and I have come to the conclusion that I very much like seeing Ewan McGregor with eye makeup. Yes indeed. Alright, I'm both rambling, and I just shat myself because a rain cloud decided to spontaneously combust and unleash lightning, rain, and the loudest damn thunder I've ever heard, so I should probably turn off my computer.

from march-hare :

welcome to the kevin smith diaryring and thanks so much for joining!

from bugbite :

have you seen Priscilla Queen of the Desert?...its a trippy austrailian movie about drag queens. you might like it. aaand, did you post your list of the perfect guy on you diary? if so, id like the link :) thanks!

from cats-scratch :

i cant believe i forgot the best similarity. our love for Rent

from cats-scratch :

hey u joined my faeries diaryring (made under brokendoll) and wow could u be anymore like me? boys in makeup dogma velvet goldmine hedwig francesca lia block cutting... it goes on and on.

from eol :

hey, if you hate the diet so much why don't you try being a fruititarian? that is, only eating fruit. you lose weight really quickly (don't do it for to long b/c you need protien, but a week or so then eat some protien for a week, then fruit, etc) plus you can go from fruit to fasting quite easily i find. anyway, good luck! ta!

from myhotelyear :

hey....email me the diet stuff....I've got to know it! please! help me lose weight *sobs*

from eol :

hey. i know what you mean when you talk about how you feel hurt by your friends not going to the beach with you. it's not petty. my best friend seems to be ignoring me lately too, i'll ask her to do something and she always seems to have to do other things.. sigh.. people suck sometimes don't they? well, hopefully things will get better!! keep on keepin on chica! stay beautiful. -eol-

from myhotelyear :

walking ad for the Manics? Man I thought I was the only one of those ;D. hehe.

from rawxchicky13 :

Pretty soon cutting takes over your life and its all you want to do and its all you thnk about. But if you were a mom and you had a daughter and you found her one day with scars all over her arms or found her in the bathroom with a razor blade, how would you feel? Im not preaching to you, but thats my opinion. I can't tell you what to do. Its your decision. But if you were looking at it from a mother or best friends point of view. How would it make you feel? I don't know what to do about your mom. She is a mother so she will probably bring it up again. You might as well talk to her. Hehe, sorry its so long.

from myhotelyear :

hey. I need to stop eating too. I'm trying to limit myself to just one meal a day, and lots of water and exercise. hey what's your AIM nickname? and where do you live?

from rawxchicky13 :

Well I don't know if this random note will help you any but I hope you feel better. I hope you stay on your fasting thing if you think thats the right thing to do. I don't know much about that. I to am a umm..."bigger person?" (im at loss for a better word) and I have really low self esteem because of it. Crappy I say. Anyways, i hope you feel better. I love your diary.

from eol :

hey! i watched hackers today too (i've seen it ten billion times...) i was listening to placebo at the time though (20th century boy from velvet goldmine mostly.. heh... i've been playing it non stop all day) anyway, that really wasn't my point.. but now i've forgotten it.. oh, congrats about being an aunt!!!!!! -eol-

from bugbite :

you know when you starve yourself your body goes into starvation mode so when you break down and eat a whole lot after starving its pure fat to your body. so dont do that. eat really super healthy stuff frequently in small quantities if you wanna lose weight. and exercise. ooh i sound like a jenny craig. haha

from myhotelyear :

I've been thinking about fasting too, woo! and I understand what you mean in the beginning of your entry, maybe way too much for the fact that I've been "depressed" for just about 4 months. ah oh well. *hugloveglitter* Stay Beautiful, Ashley

from eol :

hey, i hope everything turns out alright for you, you seem like such a cool person. i myself am trying to start a fast this week, but i dunno if i can do it either. anyway, good luck, and i hope you don't kill yourself, the world needs as many manic fans as we can get. i wish there were more of them where i lived! anyway, take care. ta! -eol-

from bugbite :

your name caught my attn and then your diary was cool. so welcome to my favorites list! haha

from myhotelyear :

hey love. *hug* I hope you have a better day tomorrow (or would it be today? too late to bother myself with the thought). I know what you mean about the cuts/scratches and your mum not noticing them......I wonder if my mum will see mine, I hope to god she doesn't but they're just so noticeable to me, you know? hopefully nobody can really see them.

from eyeslikeice :

davey havok, and robert smith look good in makeup. =) tee hee... oh yeah.. by the way, nice diary. later <3

from myhotelyear :

hey I know we're not very close friends but I wanna be a friend of yours.....let's talk more.

from incoherence :

oooo. you are cool. i like (love) guys in makeup,too! yay! go us. if i were a guy, id wear makeup,too. ^_^;

from heidiann :

Hi! Thanks so much for joining the Not Quite Bi ring. =) I'm going to come back and read your entries when I have more time. When I have the time to give you the attention you deserve! Thanks again! xox Heidi

from lho :

wow, you seem really cool, i love incubus also just to let you know. and about you think you are fat, it makes me so sad to here you say that you are "a blob" i am not exactly the thinnest of them all either but you know what...that doesn't matter. You have more to offer! Lauren

from myhotelyear :

I'm adding you to my favourite diaries list!

from bornagirl :

wow this place is cool full of Placebo fans altho ur the first manic fan I've noticed. Kick arse taste in music to u too hehe. U read my diary so I thought I'd have a look at urs. Now here's a thing to think about are we fucked up cos we are alternative types or are we alternative ppl cos we are fucked up. Think about it. Altho I was fucked when I tried to fit in. So I gave up lol. The manics are gods!

from molkolover :

Hi, thanks for joining the Richey diaryring. You have fabulous taste in music and I agree with you on the guys in make up thing. There aren't enough of us who recognise Richey as a great author - so go you! Thanks again. love and glitter. Becca xxx

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