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I sent you "hate mail", but it wasn't really hate mail. So i wonder if you just deleted it without reading it, or if in fact, you have assumed that i've died and couldn't possibly have written an email so it must have been someone posing as me but surely that can't be because i put the secret code words of "Are you fucking serious with Huckabee??". So i'm pretty sure you know it's really me dammit. Second thing - I can't leave a comment on your blog for some reason, which is why i am leaving it here. Third- i just read some of your old notes below, and DAMN. Your girl can get dirrrty.

from wilberteets :

You da man, Pete. Nice 9/11 tribute.

from anisettekiss :

liar.

from anisettekiss :

GOOD answer! BUt you know I'd give you more than one position!

from anisettekiss :

Oh, and to avoid sand-crack, we should have a beach cabana. I'm thinking: small platform, many many pillows, champagne, and white linen billowing in the ocean breeze...

from anisettekiss :

*gasp* How completely perfect. You are not allowed to offer that EVER again without backing it up! lol xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

from anisettekiss :

Dammit... email me again.

from anisettekiss :

Hmmm. What a pity... KC airline tickets are cheap too... ;)

from anisettekiss :

*snicker* I can't get dirty on my work email! But you made me totally shreik with delight!! Mmmmm. I just got a mental picture...

from anisettekiss :

NOpe. You can send me a actual version of Pete. That's my only hope...

from anisettekiss :

Aw man. I wish like, right NOW! grrr. I hate being frustrated... maybe I'll excuse myself from my desk real quick...

from anisettekiss :

Ooooh. I had this sudden reflex to arch my back a little... But yeah, you should teach me a few things. FOR SURE.

from anisettekiss :

NO excuses. You either know it or you don't. Besides, you might be "inspired" to add a few things I've never seen before... Now get over here.

from anisettekiss :

*clears items off work desk in one gracious sweep* You. Me. Here. Now.

from anisettekiss :

*fluttery-gasp* HOW did you know that was my sweet spot??? *porn-sm00ch*

from anisettekiss :

Gimme hug? ...thanks. xoxo

from anisettekiss :

Me?? Dammit Pete... quit making me crush on you. *smooch*

from anisettekiss :

"Would it be wrong for me to say that at this moment I would like to toss you onto my bed and.... (leave to your imagination)" Were you talking to me or Miss Dhanzaess. You really should be more specific. I want to know if these butterflies are mine. ;)

from anisettekiss :

Well if we're just going to kill each other anyway, get your ass and doggies over here! ;) lol!

from yamakingj :

Thank you for your kind words. I enjoyed taking your survey and appreciated that the questions were obviously addressed to people who at least attempt to think about what they believe. Again, thank you.

from anisettekiss :

You were going to move here to get with ME?? Lil old me?? I think you lie... Besides, after I said we would "kill each other" you had made no attempt to argue with me. And we both know that our relationship is based on sexual tension and arguing. xoxoxo *crazy-sex-fiend-sm00ch*

from anisettekiss :

I'm feeling a bit crummy. Please tell me you're looking for a gal like me in KC for reasons OTHER than the fact I'm a sex freak.

from plopphizz :

Pete, thanks for the note, dude. Glad you like my humour. Hey, did you know I drew a cartoon of you? -- P.P.

from dysenchanted :

You are TOO cool Pete! I just ate an entire package of Fig Newtons over the last two days... wow! :) Thanks for the note... you rock!

from anisettekiss :

"So when are you coming to KC?" PETE! We would KILL each other. You know it!! :) But I'll continue to talk dirty to you from Philly... how does that sound? Besides, I'd get all attached and you'd get bored. xoxoxo -Jenna

from anisettekiss :

Yessss. Let's get stupid.

from anisettekiss :

Lexapro - I knew you'd know how to help me... Although I was hoping you'd have a more natural way in mind. Like boinking until we're stupid. *sm00ch*

from anisettekiss :

Baby. You got yourself a Valentine. Now get to work. ;)

from anisettekiss :

Wow? What do you mean?

from spirit-chick :

Hi ~ wow, my count duckula slippers are impressive. [smiles] ...take care

from anisettekiss :

Where is everyone?? :(

from anisettekiss :

No. My comments are broken. How do i fix them???

from anisettekiss :

LOL. I just saw your comment over at my diary page... Suffer!!!! mwahahahahahaaaaa!

from anisettekiss :

LOL. That message needed like, three more "likes" in it.

from anisettekiss :

I, for one, usually get along VERY well with fellahs of your orientation. xoxoxoxxxx

from anisettekiss :

You better like it! If not, I'd be asking some serious questions...

from anisettekiss :

Totally! I gotta "thing" for guys with shaved heads. It's true! To me, it's like a whole new area of the body to kiss and lick and rub... mmmm.

from anisettekiss :

Uh yeah, that's the ticket. I just turned 21, and loving it. wooooo hoooooo!! (Okay, I'm now 26. For serious, I still feel twelve.)

from anisettekiss :

December 8th. :)

from anisettekiss :

Aww Baby. You're so good to me. I'll consider it my belated Christmas and birthday gift! XOXOXOXOXOXXXXXX.

from anisettekiss :

Don't worry about it. Besides, I was holding out for you to add me before I added you. I'ma jerk like that, I guess. xoxoxoxxxxx

from anisettekiss :

darling, you'd be applauding my ass if you saw it in person... that's all I'm gonna say.

from anisettekiss :

OKAY. Hold the phones. Who told you that!? It was Judd wasn't it? That blabber! But he tells the Lord's honest truth, so I can't stay mad.

from anisettekiss :

Pipe down and take your fucking compliment like a man. *grin* *sm00ch*

from anisettekiss :

Ooooh!! Aintcha sweet!!! xoxoxxxx

from anisettekiss :

And THAT is what I love about Men. They aren't difficult to please. xoxo Jenna

from anisettekiss :

Okay. So you filled out my survey and you read my diary. Why the hell haven't you sadi Hello??? We know like, ALL the same people. How the heck are you?? Oh. I promised I would give you a compliment. Your talent for the funny, makes me happy in my pants.

from plopphizz :

Well I am glad to see the whole locked diary thing blew over. And that you are now armed with one of the most extensive disclaimers I have ever seen ;). -- P.P.

from onewetleg :

someone was bored today or last night and took a bunch of my surveys! was is you? was it? well, if it wasn't you someone hacked you and took them in your name which would just be sick. anyway, thanks. i'd read you but i think your diary is locked. can't wait to see you at my costume party in a jockstrap, cherry almond lotion and glasses. where will you keep your wallet and keys? love, jj

from his-holiness :

I'm afeared ya done schooled me, Pete... I just ain't that nasty... Damn...

from wendyrules :

Hello Peter. How goes everything? Just thought I would check in with you, so consider yourself checked. :)

from incredipete :

Folks, if you want to read my locked diary, you will have to throw yourself upon my benevolent mercy, and send me an email at [email protected]. If I see fit, you shall receive a username and password. If you went postal on me in the recent past, don't expect to get one. Thanks!

from kalisa :

You've locked your diary? Will I never be able to read about your darling puppies again? That would be sad :( I understand if you want to be more private, though. You're an awesome dude, Pete!

from shimmafairy :

Sorry about you not being able to read my diary. I had a password cleanout. No matter, just email me at [email protected] and tell me which username and password you would like to use. I'm glad you asked for my password... your kindness is so cute!

from rkwj1 :

Hooray For Boobies!!! Cheers! (but not with a heineken). Later,ROB

from rkwj1 :

I really liked the things I hate list. I hate all of those things as well as specially the Heineken thing. It's awful tasting and I don't get the appeal. I'm a beer lover but heineken doesn't count. the only one I disagree with is the bra having three or more hooks thing. If there are three or more hooks that means that that bra is holding back some major cannons and when that forth hook is unhooked look out! Let the fun begin. Obviously I'm a breast man. later,ROB

from chadly7 :

wow - so I finally go around to reading your 101 things. i knew you were cool, but i had no idea we had so much in common. keep writing, mr. pete, and i will keep reading.

from shewhowalks :

Hope you're feeling better today!

from shewhowalks :

Awww, poor baby. I'd be more than happy to kiss it and make it better! ;) Any form of headache is just plain not good in my book. I'm glad you're feeling better now, and happy Princess Abby is doing well too!

from shewhowalks :

Hi, happy Tuesday! How's Abby?

from shewhowalks :

It's not nice to tease, babe! (And yes, I put that in my comments, but since I'd added another entry since then, didn't know if you'd go back and check there, so you're getting double the love, double the fun, and you'll like it!) =)

from shewhowalks :

You're the best. You continually make my day! Hope Abby's feeling better thismorning, it's no fun when babies are sickly!

from shewhowalks :

I wish I had the talent to change my layout. Frankly, if it's not written by someone else and able to simply be copied and pasted by me, I'm out of luck. Have a fantastic weekend Pete!

from shewhowalks :

By the way, I do like the new color scheme. I hadn't told you, so now you know. =)

from shewhowalks :

You're right, it is always a good sign. And if I'd thought it would offend, I wouldn't ever be tacky. That's just the kind of girl I am! Have a fantastic day babe!

from shewhowalks :

Just so you know before I make my tacky comment, I want you to know you make me smile on a regular basis throughout the day, and I'm now looking for houses in KC. (kidding) As for having a lot in common, I'd love to have your "bad boy" inside, in common too. ;)

from shewhowalks :

Well all have a bad boy side I think. That's okay, I like my men with a little bad boy in them! ;)

from shewhowalks :

The one thing I've learned about blue eyed pastors sons? You can't rape the willing. And you're entirely too sexy, smart and loveable to be the "bad kid". =)

from shewhowalks :

Aww! Thanks babe! You completely made my day!

from shewhowalks :

Yay! Does the side bar o' doom automatically put the newest person on top? (I love to be on top!) Or do I have special incrediprivlages today?

from shewhowalks :

Awww! I've got an official title on my comment! Yay! I wish I could be there tomorrow. I need a vacation!

from shewhowalks :

So yesterday is good for you?

from rkwj1 :

I was looking at your pictures of Maine and the lake pictures looked very farmiliar. That wouldn't be branch lake in ellsworth by chance would it? Just curious. later,ROB

from shewhowalks :

I could pick one thing from almost every person I know and make an entry for the list. I think, unless you're a perfect people (i.e. me, you, etc) you qualify in one way or another. When do you want it to be?

from shewhowalks :

See, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. You have to be sure. But, don't tell someone that you have feelings for them, and then not act upon them. Doing that just makes you number 11 on "Pete's Hierarchy of Losers"! (at least in my book)

from shewhowalks :

I was actually just talking to a friend yesterday about how I need to get a house so I can get a puppy. I LOVE dogs and haven't been able to have one in several years. I'm glad she's feeling better. And don't be jealous, they're all further away than even you are. And all the men in my life are completely noncommittal.

from mentalimages :

Very funny you bastard. Do you have any idea how f'd up my page would be if i even attempted to think about considering the idea of pasting that shit in??? Thanks anyways.

from mentalimages :

i think i'm supposed to have something on my page that shows i'm part of this diaryring or whatever...yes/no?

from shewhowalks :

Glad you're ready. Name the time and place sweetie!

from shewhowalks :

I've had the bom chiki bom bom music in my little head all day long. I need you Pete!

from shewhowalks :

Well let's get it on!

from shewhowalks :

Whoo hoo!! I'm gonna do a happy dance.... uh.. strip tease?!? =)

from shewhowalks :

Do we have to tell your other dland girlfriends? A behind the scenes afair could be fun! And, I don't want to get my ass kicked! =) We'll have to put that "rock" to some use!

from shewhowalks :

Shhhh!! That's our secret. Everyone else thinks I'm a haneous bitch. And on that whole new level of wrong, that could be lots of fun...

from shewhowalks :

I could easily take that to a whole new level of wrong. And have I told you how sexy you are?

from wendyrules :

Hmmm. Even more interesting than your little notes page was hair burner's. It seems as though you have made her status very clear. I was just wondering, what exactly is my status? Oh, you don't have to answer that. I already know. We can talk about it later. More smooches!

from wendyrules :

WOW Pete! This is the first time I have read your messages. I guess my ears should have been burning with all the talk about me. I am honored to be sure. I just dropped in to say I was finally able to edit my profile. I'm not quite sure what was wrong before. Go check it out when you get a chance. That actually means right now dammit! Smooches!!

from plopphizz :

That's terrific for your peter, Peter. But you forgot the part where you say, "And this technique can work for you, too! Ask me HOW!" -- P.P.

from gerg69 :

Yes Dave Barry is quite cool...as am I. *Ahem*

from hairburner :

You know...As a purported html jedi master something or other AND my Dland boyfriend, a girl would think she'd get an html help offer from her guy. But no, apparently your jedi skills only go to the other Wendy, who you also let name your dog. Hmmmph. (arms crossed looking very cross)

from plopphizz :

Yeah, so anyway, I think I got here via the "Incredi-Peter through natural male enhancement" spam mail link. And while you are entertaining, I must confess to no male anhancement since I have been reading your blog. -- P.P.

from shawnie4eva :

Thanks. I appreciate it Much Love, Shawnie

from hairburner :

So while you have a new puppy in KS, I've got Val Kilmer starring as Moses in the Ten Commandments Musical just down the street from here. Wanna trade?

from hairburner :

Well, this adds a whole new dimension to "Ring Whore", now doesn't it? I just finished watching a BBQ show that kept showing the sign for Olathe. They were trying to make some inane point about KC BBQ being better than Texas BBQ. Fools.

from hairburner :

Oh. Mentalimages is a chick. Oops. Hey, and you didn't tell me that instead of "sleeping" with you I could have just done a little shameless self promotion to get in your ring. IncrediPete = SneakyPete.

from hairburner :

Uhhh, you don't have to cave...I just don't like another woman bossing around my man. That's MY job. I'm very lazy though, so there won't be much bossing. In regard to mentalimages (whose message is below mine) I think it's very sad that he's sitting in a room all by himself.

from mentalimages :

I apparently just became a pledge to join your diary ring. I just wanted to get a few minutes of air time here to make sure you know why i think i'm the right person for this ring. Ready? Here's my plea: I not only think but know i am the smartest person in the room. There. I think that's sufficient.

from hairburner :

When I said slobbering, I meant not giving into Wendy's every demand. I'm not a very demanding girlfriend, but may be I should start... I just updated, I demand that you read it!

from wall-of-rain :

Hi, thanks for the birthday wishes!

from hairburner :

Yeah, but there's a not very subtle differnce bwteen being nice and being a slobbering puppy. Besides, you're supposed to slobber after me... Just ask your wingman, HRT.

from hairburner :

Since when did you become "Wendy's WhippingboyPete"? And by Wendy, I mean not me.

from hairburner :

Well, I am sorry that you got dumped. Dumb bitch, she doesn't know a good man when she sees one? Her loss, MY Gain. hee hee. As for the boat, I'll just quote my Dad:"Why on earth would you ruin a perfectly good picture of a boat by putting people in it?" Now, go to bed InsomniaPete. XOXO

from hairburner :

Ohhhh! I'm all giddy! I'm going to celebrate by taking another one of your surveys.

from hairburner :

Thanks mister! I'd put you up, but you were already there... Dial up? You must be in Maine.

from wilberteets :

I am posting this to your notes, since your comments aren't working. I have some unsolicited advice for you. I had horrible insomnia when I was in college. (Does school cause it??) The thing that bothered me most was the knowledge, during those crazy hours while I was awake, that I was not sleeping and again would have to go to school on no sleep. I would lay there, trying desperately to keep my eyes closed, only to realize they were wide open again 6 seconds later. I would count down the hours, thinking "ok... if I can just get 5 hours of sleep... then later... 4 hours of sleep?.... later still please God... 3 hours of sleep?...." The thing that finally helped me was a decision I made to stay up all night if I didn't feel like sleeping. I got out of bed when I had trouble sleeping and did something else. I watched TV, read books, worked on art projects and whatever I felt like doing. Somehow, I took all the pressure off going to sleep, stopped worrying about it, and started to notice things that made me fall asleep. Books on tape make me go to sleep, even when I don't want to. Once the pressure was off, I was able to go to sleep. I still make it a policy to wait about going to bed until I feel like I can actually sleep. It's pointless to lay there feeling miserable because you can't sleep. And turn off your head! That's what keeps you awake. When you have a lot of stuff to think about, and a lot of thoughts racing around, you can't sleep. Learn to turn off the chatter in your head. Meditation might help. Good luck.

from dalyrical1 :

hey incredible one...cool answers on the survey! thanks for taking it!! you'll be seeing me around....

from wilberteets :

Thank you Pete, for the really encouraging comment. It is really good to see that other people made it through something like this.

from chadly7 :

Hey man! Thanks for listing me in your favorites. I've done the same. Keep up the great writing!

from mentalimages :

Thanks for the note. It's my fourth which is really the most important of the notes. I like men who wear scarves on their head. It's so foreign-ish.

from meeshapeesha :

I *did* fill out your survey last week i think. And you were all ready to lay the smackdown on my ass. You forget that survey taking is quickly becoming my favorite time waster.

from kristintracy :

being hot is my cross to bear, unfortunately. that, and weak ankles.

from lealoo :

Thanks! *blushes*

from lealoo :

Maybe I should just quit while I'm ahead?

from lealoo :

Not that there's anything wrong with gay men.

from lealoo :

haha. You amuse me. It's so rare that I find a male perspective here in Dland that is not from a gay man or a complete @sshole.

from saamba :

thanks for your help & html code - i will give it a try and then slowely cut and replace html if it works. servers seem to be overloaded right now. in the meantime....I'll pass the time reading your diary. Thanks!

from wilberteets :

Hi Pete, Saucy Red-head here. I just HAD to be the first to deflower your notes page.

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