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It just totally sucks when they put your art between the beer can receptical and the air brush vagina painting lady. I know I'd be pissed. The first time I had a nude piece at an art gallery, it was a very gentle pretty little drawing of a reclining woman and they put it next to this ginormous, humungi 3 dimensional drawing of the world largest penis. My god, if you walked by the damn thing, you had to wear body armor in case it punctured your forehead. So did anyone look at my drawing? Not likely. But it was my first show, so maybe that was a good thing. :-)

from bluemeany :

That's right, there's NOTHING sexual about milkshakes. That's why the song goes "My Vicious Hog Vagina brings all the boys to my yard, damn right, it's better than yours ..."

from bluemeany :

I'm guessing that would depend on how long it takes for you to get sufficiently drunk with her in the same room.

from bluemeany :

Tell Ryan it's about fucking time! Hooray, you're officially a girlfriend, instead of unofficially-yet-still-very-obviously! And maybe also you can win the lottery. Or join the Army ...? (Hint: DO NOT DO THAT)

from bluemeany :

Commonlaw-dating! Haha! [snort]. You could start calling him your live-in fuck buddy; bet he'd love that!

from bluemeany :

Man ... some days I'm glad I'm not in school. Thank you for reminding me of that.

from bluemeany :

Hey! I was gonna submit a piece of your last entry to QUOTED, but it's like, impossible, since you're in weblog format. But I so very badly wanted to quote you!

from bluemeany :

Dude, I totally just realized I gave you my wrong e-mail address last time. Put 828 at the end of damntheman, k? I love your latest entry, and I would comment on it more, but I am soooo tiiiired.

from bluemeany :

An iPod coozie would be AWESOME -- but sadly, I have no iPod. I do, however, have a discman! Remember those?? Man, I do not feel like a hip 23-year-old right now ... anyway, email me at damntheman[AT]yahoo[DOT]com. Beeyotch! (P.S. Go 'Cuse!)

from bluemeany :

How did I not read this two days ago, when you wrote it? Damn, I am slacking. But in honor of you and your loss, I am listening to Bush (16 Stone) because Gavin is hot, and I know you agree, knowing that the best thing to do when someone dies who you did not get along with is listen to some Bush because Gavin is hot. Also -- your aunt is the Dean of SU? You do know I'm from Syracuse, do you not? What a strange coinkydink. Oh, lastly -- yay for being rid of That Woman! Crazy bitch.

from bluemeany :

Hey,thanks for the TMI about your gay ex-boyfriend. It made me feel better about myself! Oh, and don't get all down on yourself that you're a drunken undergrad -- shit, I WISH I was a drunken undergrad. My cousin, a year younger than me, is a grad, and she's still drunken! I don't even have half of my degree finished, so I'm the one who should feel like a slacker. Once I get out of the Army, I'll just be back in school, and older than most of my fellow students. So ... yeah. That's that.

from bluemeany :

Man, I wish I had someone to snuggle the dickens out of. Oh, and props to your Mom for telling off the GFOPE. Word!

from bluemeany :

Gentle Reader, Miss Manners doesn't give a shit. Plus, she is drunk on white wine. In such a state, however, Miss Manners recommends the tiara, but don't point it directly at her, because shiny things will make her ralph at this point. -- Miss "Fuck Manners" Manners

from bluemeany :

YEAAAAAH! Fuck the ex! Hooray for the L-word!

from bluemeany :

Dude, I totally know how that goes ... I have to walk everywhere here, but I guess stuff's closer for me than it would be for you. And the heat! Oh, the HEAT.

from bluemeany :

"Ryan is that old woman." -- You are the coolest girlfriend EVER. (I totally get it, though!)

from alogglalala :

I'm so sorry I wasn't online early early my time to wish you happy birthday. Sleep overtook me, I'm afraid. Hope the day wasn't too shabby, even if you did have to spend it in bed. But anyway: Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday Miss Emmerica!!! Happy Birthday to you!! (imagine being sung off key in dodgy high pitched australian accent) HOORAY!!!

from awittykitty :

Your birthday won't be forgotten. You're a whole separate, important person and we just won't let it happen, ok? Good.

from bluemeany :

Love to you, Emma dear, and I hope you have a happy birthday! To everything there is a season, but that doesn't mean the seasons' change is always pleasant. You and your grandpa will be in my thoughts and prayers. (Psst! How old are you gonna be?)

from bunny828 :

Happy Birthday (sorry that's it going to be so melenocoly). And if you don't mind me saying so ... Talk to your grandfather about the dying. Sometimes they need to talk about it and sometimes it's comforting. (Though it might be too late for that.)

from lonelywife :

will you be my friend??? You rule! xoxo

from bluemeany :

Hey, maybe he was raised to believe that honesty was the best policy!

from bluemeany :

Yay, Ryan! I am so fucking jealous of you. Does he give How To Not Be A Dick classes?

from bluemeany :

HAHAAHAAAHAAAAA!

from bluemeany :

I will totally use "skosh," but you have to find a literal translation for it in support of MY craze. Deal? And, I so love your orientation plan of "Get the fuck over yourselves."

from bluemeany :

I can sympathize with the sleeping problems. I used to cure that with sex, but now, due to geographical issues, I just lay in bed praying for darkness to envelop me. Maybe you could try warm milk?

from bluemeany :

You are so right about microwaved pop-tarts -- they are not the crispy. tasty treat you are hoping for. Get thee to a toastery! (Does that translate to "go to a toaster shop"? Ah, well.)

from bunny828 :

Hello Emma, I also followed blue's link. If you are looking for a way to link in a comments section http://www.haloscan.com offers free comments. I must admit I'm not sure how it works with the weblog style, but maybe it will be of interest to you.

from arc-angel666 :

Just when you thought everything was okay! I was relieved to hear you weren't lickin Dino Doody when all the sudden there you are leaning up against a giant Roadrunner. Not only leaning against him but your hands behind your back coppin a feel...is that something that happens on a regular basis in Texas? Okay I can get pass the feelin up a Roadrunner, but then I see your starting up some inter- galaxtic trouble. Goodness your in search of Alien boogies! Picking an Aliens nose can only lead to trouble...War of the Worlds started that way, that's right Tom Cruise was Alien boogy pickin and if you saw the movie you know what happens next. Damn Girl, Lickin Dino Doody, Feelin up birds and pickin Alien noses now that's weird, so I was wondering do you want to go out sometime?

from alogglalala :

Firstly, bluemeany, again. Secondly, brilliant fan club idea. Thirdly, your collages are gorgeous. Fourthly(?), I've got a new name for my buddy list! Cheers!

from bluemeany :

Oh, yay! See Emma, everyone wants to be in your fan club; they just didn't know you were here to adore. Smooch!

from divacowgirl :

Meany made me come too. Look how we all follow her orders so quicky, lol.

from arc-angel666 :

Ma'am Reporting as order, Ma'am! Yeah I was a soldier once too. Alrighty then! The Meany told me to drop by and keep you company. Okay lets get the formal stuff out of the way first. My name is Michael and I very please to meet you (as I said that I did a grand sweeping bow, my hand nearly touching the floor). Okay that's taken care of...now down to business. What the hell is that your licking? There you are petting Dinosaurs and then your sticky your tongue into a pile of Dino Doody Yikes, but then again I wouldn't expect anything less from a good friend of the Meany's (I'm one too)So Emma tell me of you?

from thedetails :

Ok, I came here as per Blue Meany's orders. I agree with Wild Rosie, hold off on the blue hair for a bit. Don't really have much else to say, but Meany ordered me here so here I am!!!

from warcrygirl :

I second Blue meany on the comments motion as I am far too lazy to keep coming back to notes. And I plan on coming back, oh yes.

from wildrosie :

Oh, I almost forgot, I will agree with the popular vote this time, no blue hair when visiting grandpa...Though there are quite a few old ladies who have blue and lavender hair. ~Rosie~

from wildrosie :

OK, I obeyed orders, and I'm here. But my question is, Where is Central Texas? I mean, doesn't West Texas go on for fucking ever until all of a sudden you are in East Texas? That's how it's always seemed to me every time I've gone to visit my Texas relatives. Yes, I am a closet Texan descendant. Mah Daddy was from Texas, went to the University in Austin. Now that I've joined bluemeany, the meeting ahould get more interesting! ~Rosie~

from bluemeany :

I move that you get a comments section, because I hate notes. All in favor? Great, looks like you're gettin' a comments section! And, good choice on not shocking the life out of the Grandpa.

from bluemeany :

Yo. Kerouac RULES. Read "The Subterraneans." And everything else he's written. "Big Sur" was another of my favorites. Also, why the fuck am I the only one on your notes page? Do you have a comment section I don't know about, where all the cool kids go?

from bluemeany :

Damn. You make me feel soooo smart.

from bluemeany :

10 a.m. ... you suck. I begrudge you. If that makes sense.

from bluemeany :

I wish someone would call ME a hussy ... that's so much more creative than "ho" or "bitch." You should feel honored! :)

from bluemeany :

Hey now, don't let my marital troubles interfere with your shower fantasies! But thanks for the link, anyway. ;) Sorry about your wine mishap -- but hey, all of us true drunks have to pick cork remnants out of our teeth once in a while!

from bluemeany :

YEAH! I am SO leaving your first fucking note! You rule. As does your not-boyfriend, as long as he's nice to you.

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