DiaryLand members area

We feared you were asea OP...some of our weekly routines involve reading your regular updates. (I realize that's a lot of pressure, but I know you're up to it; now go type something brilliant! You know...like you do. Selfishly yours, ee)

from ernst :

I've stood hungover in a small town TX drugstore, enduring the most disapproving and tight-lipped frown ever from a Southern Baptist lady-pharmacist who looked liked she'd rather quit her job than provide the “Plan B” pill I'd requested at the behest of a beautiful young someone whose perfume lingered on my person. But I live below estimation and above concern—thus is the double standard.

from bombasine :

i waited until i was on the other side of the world to buy a pregnancy test. it's really something, isn't it - all the different lives we might lead. <3

from annanotbob2 :

Nosy shop assistants. I hear you. In the 80s when my kids were young I only bought baby-related things in the chemist - before disposable nappies, but I'd get the plastic pants to go over cloth nappies, which perish, nappy soaking solution, etc. One day, my mate Tony, the one who crashed into my EMDR session the other week, was coming out of prison so I went to buy some condoms and honestly, you should have seen the smirk on the face of the bloody woman in the shop! I had to challenge her, she did apologise, we both laughed and she said she was glad I was getting some at last, so I fully understand your choice to not shop local. Hugs

from swordfern :

Of all your beautiful writing, I'm on tenterhooks about your period being late. Sending love.

from ernst :

No the H52O is quite real, and still sitting in a gallon jug on the bar at the big house...waiting for someone to discover its purpose. (My uncle is an industrial chemist, so this conversation wasn't unusual for us.)

from ernst :

I thought Ruth Ozeki sounded familiar...because yeah, I totally read “A Tale for the Time Being”, and on trains between Tokyo and Kyoto! (She's just not on/under my bookshelf 'cause I always shed/donate my travel reading to make souvenir-gift space.) Engaging novel though--Japan's manifold social milieus and their implications play a huge role...a great read for visitors, now that I think about it.

from loveherwell :

how absolutely lovely you are in every note you leave <3 i still read your entries every day, even when i'm not updating. you--and your way with words--are a favorite of mine.

from ernst :

"I fancy each stitch as a moment in time, tiny and unprepossessing, but linked to other moments, it contributes to a form resembling one of nature; in this, it is beautiful, however humble and clumsy. I am stitching my time, my life, into a modest tapestry of the world in fragment." You might have packed light for Maynooth, but you packed a lot into one well-considered and elegant paragraph here, OP.

from browndamask :

How kind of your fellow train passenger to share his half-handed compliment on your work. Ha! Some people.

from ernst :

Had to look up "marinières", good to know. (I've always just called 'em "mime shirts"...)

from secret-motel :

I hope you'll post links to those newspaper pics. I'd love to see how it all turns out.

from ernst :

Out of grasp perhaps, but forever (per a lifetime) recurrent.

from ernst :

Fireside reading party? NERRRDS! (OK maybe I'm a little jealous...)

from annanotbob2 :

Sending love and hoping you're as well as can be x

from portlypete :

I'm not sure my branch of Sainsbury's stocks carageenan. :-)

from annanotbob2 :

Awful. I was all set to try that seaweed remedy but we don't get that kind of seaweed here - the clue's in the name x

from browndamask :

You’ve very much been in my thoughts after the past few entries. Hoping things look up with the MIL, or that you get some respite. I can’t imagine why you, like myself, would want to retreat into those inner worlds. (Ha!)

from kelsi :

I'm sorry your in-laws are such turd buckets. What's their problem?? Hang in there, you. <3

from annanotbob2 :

3/1 Hugs x

from portlypete :

My New Year's resolution, apart from giving up the drink (which lasted two ... yes, TWO whole days) is to read your diary more. I'll not comment further yet

from ernst :

"Certain thoughts glimmer in my mind, and trail off to their dens in wee sparks", beautifully put.

from ernst :

Because there wasn't enough interest in Texas Division II collegiate fencing to field a women's squad, we had a lady swordsman on our team. She was brilliant, and the rest of us, when we fought her, were predictably overconfident. You should hear what “parry-riposte” sounds like w/a thick Southern accent. (Also yes w/the never-washed tourney gear...I assume it's for fear of the wiring?)

from ernst :

The idea of siting in a barrel-sauna on a tiny pier under dark skies, rocked about by the encroaching threat of a storm is, in my imagination, laden w/goth-Victorian association...and I'm well-jealous.

from ernst :

“Vomitous” is a word I don't use nearly enough...and not for lack of occasion.

from annanotbob2 :

27/11 Good girl, cheers *clink of glasses*

from kelsi :

How is your dog doing?

from browndamask :

Thank you for sharing the Iizuna Fair video. So beatiful. Watched it a few times.

from ernst :

That sounds like the kind of party where someone, at some point, would definitely shush me...

from ernst :

There's so much going on in Ziad's ostensibly-forthright documentation of displacement...a combination of stoic resignation, dismay, and a surreal persistence of the familiar that wouldn't occur those of us who've never lived under siege. He gives measured voice to the humanity behind the heartbreaking headlines, and I hope against hope that the next missive comes under quiet skies and involves their return home.

from ernst :

There's something portentous/unsettling about the suddenness of Autumnal nightfall. (Which isn't necessarily a bad thing...sometimes the end of summer leaves one almost too-settled?)

from swordfern :

That poem was read at the funeral for a 12-year old boy that I attended a couple of weeks ago. I love how words can resonate across continents and cultures.

from ernst :

A beautiful part of vacation I think, is that a “world of sunshine and flowering trees” remains forever sunny and flowering in one's memory...untouched by daily travails and disappointments, preserved like a mermaid in a snow-globe.

from kelsi :

I hope you figure out what's going on with Sam!

from narcissa :

Love these snapshots from your vacation

from browndamask :

You have such a beautiful way with words.

from toejam :

I sometimes think that you and I are the same person. It's mid afternoon on a Monday when I just worked five days in a bar and I don't want to see another face today, my day off, or talk. But I have to. I'm just gearing up to put clothes on and get out there in the world. It's really only a couple hours of being human that I have to do...but I'm dreading it.

from ernst :

This juxtaposition between oneirec submersion and tetchy familiarity suits your writing, and the postcards have been much appreciated.

from kelsi :

Oh no, poor dog - I hope he gets feeling better soon!

from annanotbob2 :

"fringed like the beguilingly feathered bottoms of vintage Las Vegas showgirls." My friend Jo went to Vegas and became a showgirl in 1982 - I'm going to send her that description - she'll love it x

from kelsi :

My dog has recovered! o/ And your dog will be so happy to see you when you get back - but in the meantime, enjoy your vacation!!

from loveherwell :

honestly, a holiday of mostly sleeping and reading sounds absolutely perfect!

from ernst :

It's not just a change of scenery that a plane ticket buys you, but a shift in perspective...a whole new world of productivity, perhaps? (Don't sell naps and pistachios short.)

from ernst :

Wow, well...tip your porter, and try to make it out of the room a few times. x

from kelsi :

I have such nice memories of reading Summer by Edith Wharton - in the early days of the pandemic, working from home, I'd take breaks and go out to the front porch to read in the sun for 10 or 15 minutes at a time. It was so nice during such a weird time.

from ernst :

"...un vieil ange avec une âme de chaton", an "old angel with the soul of a kitten"; aspirational, non? Definitely my type, Zgougou.

from annanotbob2 :

Merci.

from ernst :

F*cking Ram...

from annanotbob2 :

You are a bit genius, with your words and how you turn your life into a poetic dream space

from ernst :

Deft and mysterious prose here, from this Deborah Levy...and the internet just informed me that I'm late to the party, so I'll certainly check her out. Happy 46th as well, it was a great year for me personally (and a perfect year, i'm told, for anyone to quit smoking!) xoxo

from kelsi :

Happy birthday!

from secret-motel :

Happy 46, young lady.

from annanotbob2 :

I'm glad you had a happy birthday. It sounds lovely x

from annanotbob2 :

I'm glad you had a happy birthday. It sounds lovely x

from browndamask :

Happy belated birthday!

from browndamask :

The ebb & flow of the tides - the cycle of loss & life. Also, here's to hoping your September affords you time to self-recharge. Sounds like you haven't had time for that lately?

from ernst :

Yer photos and words inform each other neatly, and it's a privilege to appreciate both. Anniversaries well observed, OP.

from ernst :

It's the mania that binds them, a shared fervor that leaves little space for comprehension. (We've got a whole political party in the 'States that's (re)built itself by exploiting the same...) Kick him in the balls for me, thanks.

from whitepigeon :

my witchy finger's always reaching for yours

from browndamask :

re: 8/19/23 - Oooh, I need one of those days too. Sounds like a dream.

from browndamask :

Thank you! I'm trying to train myself to look for it more. Coming out of a rough period that was largely precipitated by my own poor attitude and perspective.

from ernst :

Fail better! A halfhearted (but hearted nonetheless!) rally cry I can relate to.

from portlypete :

So glad you had a good time in Edinburgh; one of my favourite cities - home to some of my ancestors too. I wouldn’t like to speculate on why there were no female artists’ works on display, but I imagine it was a different (not better) world back then. Fortunately, things have changed now, otherwise we wouldn’t be able to enjoy Tracey Emin’s iconic “My Bed”. By the way, your depiction of the wake perfectly describes the way I would want to go out.

from narcissa :

Thanks, appreciate it. Feeling better today

from ernst :

Van Huysum's paintings are a trip...you can totally lose your mind amongst the dewdrops and ants an' shit. I've seen a few at the National Gallery (featuring the same vase and nest), one at LACMA (same vase, substitute fruit) and I thought we had one at the Met; but apparently those blooms and bees and terra-cotta cherubs were painted by his (female!) student Margereta Haverman.

from annanotbob2 :

No women artists? ffs. I started following 'womensart' on Twitter a while ago who consistently post loads of art by women every day from every period - women were always there, always painting as well as the men, just never acknowledged. But also, thank you for giving the full details of your favourites. I loved the Macbeth which I'd never seen - the emptiness of the massive landscape - and the flowers, man I love those vases of flowers from that period.

from ernst :

Yeah, 95% of my local (like a dismaying 43% of the American voting public) is comprised of those same idiots. And I've already called 'em all “racist cunts”, or the Yank equivalent, at length, and we've had it out one way or another. Didn't change a one I reckon...but I drink in relative peace and quietude now. (Is this easier to do when you're a white man, and 6'2”? Yes. Yes it is. So I've no excuse not to, do I?) Safe travels OP.

from ernst :

I think my Sinéad comment came off wrong. I'd intended to express sympathy for her mental health struggles, but they're over now, and there's no call to dilute a legacy of concrete adversity and hard-earned success. Good luck snifflin' in Scotland (sucks that you can't buy the “fun” cold medicine anymore...thanks for nothing meth-cooks!)

from ernst :

About a month ago, for some reason, “Mandinka” occurred to me when I was putting together a playlist for a friend. So I looked it up, listened for the first time in an age, and was dismayed by the dated, gimmicky, production. I've watched two live versions in the wake of her passing though, and the unvarnished power and fearlessness of her vocal choices is showcased in both. Hard not to be "misunderstood" when you struggle to understand yourself, I'd imagine RIP

from ernst :

I think for most of us, when we're young, “imagining ourselves” and “being ourselves” are just a sort of symbiotic tangle we take for granted. Seamlessly informing each other. Your realization/articulation of the dichotomy def strikes a familiar chord, and speaks to my current challenge, “remembering myself”.

from ernst :

"And now, 'walking'..." (w/the cones out, brilliant.)

from narcissa :

i'm with anna. two punches. xox, it sounds so hard, i wish it wasn't like this for you over there. It is so intolerable when being home feels spiky and unwelcoming.

from annanotbob2 :

Sometimes I want to punch the m-i-l. Honestly.

from ernst :

Intolerable.

from ernst :

Intolerable.

from swordfern :

Thank you! I'm okay and recovering. I'll finish writing the story once I have a bit more energy. :(

from browndamask :

how small minded to judge you for something that has nothing to do with your character as a person. so sorry you’re having to deal with that. sounds like you have a good guy standing up for you.

from swordfern :

I'm not sure exactly what you represent to them that they hate so much, but I know that their treatment of you is not a reflection of you as a person. I'm sorry that you are subject to their pettiness and wish that I could be there to go for a walk and a talk and maybe a drink so that you could vent and we could cry/laugh at the ridiculousness of it all.

from ernst :

Whether or not mistreatment deserves forgiveness, at least there usually exists a path to peace...but small-mindedness is irremediable; and frustration at the futility of even trying compounds, in my experience, the misery of the aggrieved. Hang in there OP, thumbs up.

from loveherwell :

your in-laws have no idea what they are missing out on. it is absolutely their loss, and i am 100% certain that you are not a horrible person. if nowhere else, you do fit in here.

from kelsi :

Well, you do fit in quite well here, and it occurred to me that maybe that's why we're all still here - this is the place we fit in best. (p.s. sorry about the awful in-laws - they sound like huge turds.)

from annanotbob2 :

12/7 Yes, I feel that so strongly. I usually have to put my head under the tap to get myself back from this weird intruder using my face, probably for nefarious purposes

from swordfern :

The weird place of in-between. Pregnancy or peri-menopause, either option vaguely unlikely yet also possible.

from browndamask :

in love wit the 7/7/23 entry

from toejam :

Good lord, I'm moving in with you.

from kelsi :

Thanks! The gastrointestinal aspect is quite important, so I'm actually pretty happy about that :)

from ernst :

Oh the singular state of discomposure brought about by exhausting, innumerable shop windows, resiny liqueur and dangerous-looking bathtubs! (You may well be in an Edward Gorey story as we speak, m'lady...)

from annanotbob2 :

Holy show - I like that.

from oatmealjoey :

help me, diary land owes me money at joeyarnoldvn

from ernst :

Truth OP (and dancing to ABBA should be part of the Voight-Kampff test).

from browndamask :

that last paragraph on 6/8, so good!

from ernst :

"One who hasn't compromised her way of being, perhaps" That's a fraught speculation, from my position as someone who's sacrificed happiness at the altar of my "way of being". But it's a great fucking question that cuts to the bone of our dailies and the choices that led us to 'em. Elegantly and intriguingly put as always OP.

from ernst :

Never underestimate the positive power of negative thinking.

from boombasticat :

I love hearing about others' favorite books. This one's new to me. Added to the list. And thanks for sharing your words, too.

from ernst :

“Tepid and pinched” indeed…seems a lot of us scribblers here have felt likewise of late. Lovely to hear from a Martin for a minute though, carefree and soaring above it all.

from annanotbob2 :

14/5 Love your words so much. So glad you write here to share them with us x

from kelsi :

In a way it's a shame we don't die of consumption anymore, isn't it - 'tuberculosis' just doesn't have the same ring to it. <3

from annanotbob2 :

Big hugs and I hope that this feeling passes away into memory for you as it did for me when I lived with it for a while. Hugs

from ernst :

Packet of fried garlic bread from the Polish grocery? Hells yeah...I'm definitely gastronomic-team-husband. Hope you heal up and are regaling us w/your daily insights again soon OP.

from narcissa :

sure sounds like COVID... regardless, I hope you feel better soon. Or at least you get to that part where you're well enough to enjoy having to lie in bed and see no one/be nowhere.

from annanotbob2 :

I had my first Polish donut recently, filled with blackcurrant jam, so delicious. Hope you feel better soon x

from ernst :

That languor was hard-earned: hours spent at bus stops and on train rides, hours spent listening to whatever a radio DJ played while watching traffic from the front porch as twilight crept...spent searching anxiously for a pay phone. And while I can still evoke the languor (on vacation mostly), it's the sense-of-self that our formative “alone time” engendered that I feel slipping away sometimes.

from annanotbob2 :

I'm by your side, passing you the knives to sharpen

from narcissa :

"at night I must stitch together a new skin, its material filched from books" [*swoon* you're so talented]

from ernst :

Thanks OP, it's gettin' dire. I've been reading your posts like rain-porn...

from ernst :

"...feeling its way to the sea with the immediate and assured memory of water." Oh but don't I want to leap in a join it forever in-kind sometimes.

from ernst :

"...feeling its way to the sea with the immediate and assured memory of water." Oh but don't I want to leap in a join it forever in-kind sometimes.

from ernst :

"...feeling its way to the sea with the immediate and assured memory of water." Oh but don't I want to leap in a join it forever in-kind sometimes.

from loveherwell :

i've been terrible at reading notes lately, but i just want to drop one now to remind you how lovely it is to read your writing. it always feels like a wash of calm over me.

from ernst :

Much like (and coinciding with) my years in LA, I was fortunate enough to catch the fading vestiges of 60's/70's Vegas weirdness on my initial visits, and it was glorious. This was back when ¾ of the strip was tumbleweeds docked against hurricane fences bordering blocks w/out sidewalks. My last trip was like 15 yrs ago, but the place already felt like a shopping mall. And the grumpy bachelor in me was quick to blame it on the fact that people started bringing their f*cking kids to Vegas...but everywhere looks like a shopping mall now, and those poor f*cking kids...this is their inheritance?

from annanotbob2 :

One of my friends was picked on the street in Brighton to be a showgirl in a show 'Jubilee' at the MGM in Las Vegas, in about 1982. She went, strutted about on massively high heels, with tall feathers on her head and her breasts exposed, for a few years and then ended up marrying the electrician on the show. She brought up her children there, one of whom is big into the fostering/adoption world. I get two versions of Vegas - the one you mention, from friends who go there for a few nights, and this one, all about the school system, church events, adoptions. It's very strange. x

from ernst :

Nooks and dark galleries...the clarity of the moment in a “waystation”. A familiar feeling, elegantly articulated.

from loveherwell :

thank you so much!! :)

from portlypete :

Thanks for extending my vocabulary. From now on, I intend to latibulate whenever the news comes on the Telly. Real life becomes increasingly hard to cope.

from annanotbob2 :

I was married to un Canario, briefly, in my 20s. I remember flan as a dull name for a delicious dessert, in fact the only dessert ever offered. I also got sunburn and sunstroke very badly which I am paying for now, fifty years later with lots of pre-cancerous lesions appearing. I've tried not to dump all my Canary Island stories on you, but tonight I have failed. Have a safe trip home and a joyful reunion with your Sam x

from swordfern :

I just loaded Cold Enough for Snow onto my eReader. How could I resist the suggestion of a book with writing reminiscent of yours?

from ernst :

Heliotropes thrive over an impressive range globally. And from a reader's standpoint, one San Diego transplant seems to be flourishing in distant, quiescent soil.

from ernst :

Thanks OP, my mind does tend to be more observant whilst running. Probably to distract from the niggling pains in my knee and my ankle and my groin...it's an old injury séance at my age, basically. Where every ache is summoned-back and has a say about it. Hope 2023 does right by you, always look forward to your posts m'lady.

from ernst :

Well, you stole the heart of her golden boy didn't you? A conflict not-without literary/mythological precedent. But yeah, proximity doesn't help. Tangled up in apron-strings...hang in there OP.

from whitepigeon :

Ahh, I just treated myself to a re-read of R.L. Stevenson's A Child's Garden of Verses (after 30+ years away) and was charmed and piqued in equal measure // let me know when you get to New Arabian Nights? :)

from secret-motel :

Haha, pix of you in the sequined jumper, please.

from narcissa :

16 dec... i often think to myself that no one really prepares us for in-laws. Like.. i know it's a trope. But still. There is no real preparation for the reality of in-laws and the way suddenly your lives are entwined and it lasts forever. // Thank you for the wishes. I started to write, "it's ok, i had naproxen!" but in fact, it was deeper than that, and your wishes helped me feel better.

from toejam :

I was laughing today while reading your recent entry about thawing in front of a space heater. I've been living in front of my oven set at 500F for days, trying to thaw. Today I smelled burning hair and realized that it was ME scorching myself in some attempt at warming up.

from loveherwell :

thinking about it that way definitely makes it feel better!

from ernst :

Your Dad lived quite the life OP. The Iranian military-exchange pilots assigned to my father's command were likewise stranded when the Shah was deposed, and the perspective, grace, and resilience they and their families exhibited in the face of bigoted nationalist backlash is something I'll never forget. (Not to mention the cooking, songs, etc. when they'd host us for dinner...)

from kelsi :

Your writing workshop teacher ripped up your poem? I'm sorry, that sounds really awful - but I also kind of think that could be the prompt for a hilarious writing exercise. So many possibilities! <3

from swordfern :

Venice. Ughh, I've missed reading you! Thank you for magically transporting me there for moment.

from swordfern :

Thanks for the well wishes. I struggled with whether to write about it, as it feels in some ways that it's my fault for getting it, but it's still scary and affects me deeply. Thank you for caring.

from loveherwell :

on our trip this summer, venice was our favorite stop as well. it feels silly to say it felt weirdly magical... but that's what it was!

from annanotbob2 :

I've not been to Venice but I remember the first time I went to Italy and could well believe it was the home of the gods

from ernst :

That read like an elegantly-typeset drip of morphine. Great stuff OP.

from swordfern :

I'm sad to hear that she values her relationship with you at 9 euros. On the other hand, I can't say that I've ever come across an accountant with a high EQ.

from ernst :

Even as Marc Augé was coining the phrase, a generation whose youth was defined in “non-places” was already imbuing them w/nostalgic sentiment. It's like a codified aesthetic now--the kids' fascination w/interstitial spaces, aging malls and other architectural muzak...as the “non-places” they remember are being replaced by more-egregiously cynical corporate construction. And though I'm too old to have much attachment (my guilty pleasure is early 70's Brutalist), I'm always encouraged by a bit of sentimental nihilism. Glad your talk was a hit OP. Jealous of that Turner show.

from annanotbob2 :

Yes, about Turner. He's a bit like Thomas Hardy with one foot in the past but able to see the industrial future fast approaching.

from secret-motel :

Yeah, I would rather write a fifty-page essay than deliver a two-minute speech. I'm more into public sneaking than public speaking. But you are a smart, thoughtful lady. You will be awesome.

from portlypete :

I envy you your trip to Venice. Be sure to visit Murano and Burano - so beautiful.

from whitepigeon :

ahh, so much love for May Sarton…a reminder to Plant (My) Dreaming Deep

from annanotbob2 :

17/09 This made me weep, in a good way. Thank you x

from secret-motel :

Happy 45, young lady!

from loveherwell :

happy birthday!! i wish i could send the cry laughing emoji, hahaha.

from annanotbob2 :

Happy birthday - hope you have a good day. Mothers, though. Honestly. Sigh x

from babyhead :

Regarding 08.27.22 I cannot circumscribe the nature of your relationship with your sister-in-law, but your every left me (forgive my working class sentiment) thinking someone deserved a kick in the box. Either she can't see the wonder that you are, or she sees it too clearly.

from ernst :

I've never been to Ireland so yeah, to kelsi's point; sometimes your posts do read like beautiful lost episodes of 'Ballykissangel”. When you write about places I know well though, when the “night pours over the bones of the desert”, I get a more visceral appreciation of your craft and perspective. (An appreciation tinctured w/a motivational dose of talent-envy...)

from ernst :

After you wrote "tracksuit with a cowboy hat", "creeps me out" became implicit.

from boombasticat :

Thanks, orangepeeler. I really enjoy reading your words.

from annanotbob2 :

Ha - I have loads in Cancer too - Mercury, Venus, Jupiter and Uranus, all kind of hiding but likely to bite if you don't watch yourself. Aquarius rising though so playing my own game to my own rules and not even knowing it most of the time.

from kelsi :

Um, are you a character from a quirky television show about a fantastical fictional village? Show Day? Vying for prizes? Dog show and fowl beauty contest?! These things sound too good to be true!

from annanotbob2 :

Thanks for your note. I think, now you mention it that the most recent funeral I went to was 'livecast' so one of the daughters who couldn't travel could both make a speech and presumably watch the whole service. xx

from narcissa :

i had to look up "a rake of..." and i think i get it. how many years of rakes did you need to consume before you felt like you could just throw that around and does working in a pub give you extra license to use it? [the curse of the immigrant - always wondering whose language i get to use and when]

from annanotbob2 :

18/7 Do you ever listen to Michael Rosen's Word of Mouth? It's on Radio 4 but available any time via BBC Sounds. This week's is on old regional names for plants, though it's almost always interesting, looking at language

from portlypete :

Congrats on the review.Let's hope a cheque is in the post. My "modest stake in the world" is clutching its proverbial throat and gasping for water.

from swordfern :

I'm not sure who else could describe illness and hospitalization with such grace. It's always so beautiful to read your words.

from ernst :

“So easily I could have surrendered to another week, a month even, to that bed, just for a momentary cessation of my cares and concerns.” Your hospital notes brought to mind Mann's “The Magic Mountain”. Beautifully put, all of it.

from narcissa :

Such a hard time to be in hospital (never a good time but i can imagine that now it’s the worst). I hope you are getting the answers and care you need and that you can get out of there soon. And most of all, hope you can get some rest today.

from annanotbob2 :

Thanks for note. I hope you said, "Yes, I am a writer." xx

from ernst :

Oh wow, OP - Given what I've gleaned from your latest, the fact that you took the time to send such kind words about my unedited (since fixed...ish) expository road-trip blargh is not lost on me. (And if anyone could emerge from the horror of a 15-hour emergency-room wait with a list of book refs...) Heal up milady, please.

from loveherwell :

i hope your health takes a turn for the positive very soon!

from kelsi :

Oh geez, that sounds terrible - I hope you get feeling better soon!

from annanotbob2 :

Oh bloody hell. Sending love and good wishes for prompt attention and healing. I knew our health service has been run into the ground but hadn't realised Ireland's was in a bad way also. x

from ernst :

Hey OP, is your book a thing someone might find in the world and maybe buy? Asking as yer #1 superfan -ee

from blueisnotred :

How to deal with mother in laws huh. Mine is an issue too. A lot of patience is required. Well done to those able to grin and bear it.

from narcissa :

ommmmmmmmmmmmg that blender story. [from someone in her 40s currently living with her parents]

from swordfern :

A forming moment in my life was when my grandmother told me that she didn't believe in heaven and that we are already living in paradise. It seemed a radical proposition at the time, and then I started to realize that I too experienced moments where this was true.

from annanotbob2 :

The worst thing, awful. I know that's a platitude but I couldn't just stroll past and say nothing. Hugs to you and your friend. xxxx

from loveherwell :

that's so awful. i'm so sorry to hear that.

from annanotbob2 :

This is just one of the many things that makes me furious about Brexit - the arrogance and ignorance of ignoring how Ireland can proceed. I remember 'the troubles' very clearly, on the news every night. There weren't many bombs on the mainland but one of them was eight miles from where I lived. Sigh.

from loveherwell :

it's such a good feeling :)

from narcissa :

these last couple of years have convinced me the apocalypse isn't meteor armageddon, but rather a kind of frog-in-a-slowly-warming-pan, tho you said it much more nicely. It's hard not to despair.

from annanotbob2 :

I'm glad your plague is mild and hope you have an enjoyable time. Quite a few of my friends loved it, once they realised they weren't going to be actually ill.

from portlypete :

Well done to the Maloneys for taking in those refugees. I continue to be apalled at the UK's pitiful reaction to the humanitarian crisis in Ukraine. Boris, the blustering buffoon, is all mouth and no trousers (which is an image best erased as soon as). Well done to Ireland whose humanitarian response is way above ours in England.

from babyhead :

Not to butter your bread, but I have always looked forward to seeing your alias lit up in red, you have always inspired me to be a better writer, but God knows, it's my editing that needs a champion. In the end, when the site was down and I thought it wasn't coming back, all I could feel was that I was robbed of something I never owned.

from loveherwell :

every time dland goes down, i have that little worry: what if it's gone forever? i would miss all of your musings, for sure.

from swordfern :

I would miss reading your writing too. Glad that we still have this, for however much longer it lasts.

from narcissa :

march 15. congratulations on your book, what an amazing thing to send into the world.

from swordfern :

All the best on surviving the plague in your house. "Ah well." I think that's what I'd say too. There's only so long one can avoid it.

from loveherwell :

this is just to say that reading your writing is always a lovely spot in my day. you're such a good writer, and the way you string words together makes me feel so much more than i ever expect to.

from kelsi :

Thanks for the birthday wishes! I hope for good changes for you this year as well! :)

from portlypete :

Many thanks for the James Meek reference. How often throughout history have fanatical individuals wrought unimaginable pain and death on millions?

from annanotbob2 :

24/2/22 yes, all this

from swordfern :

02.24.22 - A touching entry today. Thank you for this.

from portlypete :

The early signs of spring are many: snow-drops, early blossom - tenatious enough to survive the storms; crocuses and daffodil buds. Better days will soon be here, if we aren't embroiled in WW3 :-) Always a down-side!

from loveherwell :

thank you!! it's been a lovely day and weekend :)

from portlypete :

That is such a poignant post about your dad.

from annanotbob2 :

I don't know what to say about your post about the vigil for Ashling Murphy but I couldn't just scroll on past. xxx

from boombasticat :

Thanks! I really enjoy your posts.

from annanotbob2 :

I emigrated to Tenerife with my then-husband in 1973, before it became a tourist attraction and had to come home when I'd read every book in English. Some of us NEED books. I hope you don't get the thing and if you do I hope it's mild

from annanotbob2 :

All good xx

from loveherwell :

thank you :) also, that hockney quote is lovely.

from annanotbob2 :

I'd really like to send you a Christmas Card, as your beautiful writing and thoughtful approach to life and its difficulties has helped me on my way so often. I love seeing your name in red on my buddies list. If you'd rather not share your details then no worries at all, or you could drop me a line at [email protected] and I promise not to go weird! x

from narcissa :

dec 1 -- - if you knew how i agonized about my little paragraph on love. i was like, "i don't know how to talk about this anymore, it's too big and also...i dont know, not something i want to define me". Anyway. I am so grateful for every entry you write, you have such a gift.

from annanotbob2 :

I missed your entries while I was away, your way of looking at the world, at life. My nephew will marry in two weeks. I can't imagine how that will be, in these times x

from narcissa :

: ) thanks, It is so fun!!!

from swordfern :

It's nice to hear from you and know that you are thinking of me. Your latest snippet about your husband and you finding his earmark in the book wrenched my heart. The way that you convey a situation, an emotion, is remarkable.

from annanotbob2 :

thanks xx

from narcissa :

the writer nicole chung: “One reason we read is to know that burst of recognition when someone supplies new language for that which we once found indescribable". Your entry yesterday (nov 18), on wounds, was that for me. I caught my breath in recognition when i read it and rolled the words around in my mind all day, grateful for your insight.

from loveherwell :

seriously, that outfit sounds incredible.

from ernst :

Related heavily to the strawberry anecdote...the first gastronomic epiphany I remember was also in Cali. I was in 4th grade maybe. My Dad was stationed in Monterey and we stopped in Salinas for lunch on a day-trip (in a station-wagon, not a bitchin' Camaro sadly) and, at a taqueria attached to a laundermat, I had homemade tortillas, carne asada and fresh pico de gallo for the first time. A revelation that, to this day, can fold time.

from swordfern :

A beautiful memory, sad and yet expansive. How a sensory experience like a taste or a smell can be a vehicle for time travel.

from babyhead :

Re: The Vespertine Hour Such evidence of your beautiful brilliance. 10/13

from kelsi :

Oh that sounds so nice, going into hibernation for the winter!

from loveherwell :

thank you -- your words are so kind and appreciated. i hope that it will guide me, too. (also that board member... sheesh!)

from ernst :

We are primed, in our 40's, for leveraging decades of hard-earned knowledge against the inevitable re-entry of our story-arc into the mesosphere of our mortality. It's a great time to flex...I would say though, as one 12 yrs your senior, your 50's will surprise you (provided you finally quit smoking and live that long...) Maximum happiness to you and yours, OP.

from babyhead :

Happy birthday! Here is wishing you a new pile of books beside the cake.

from moodswing :

Happy extended birthday! I hope you got your wine and book.

from swordfern :

Happy 44th Birthday!

from kelsi :

Happy birthday!

from secret-motel :

Happy 44! That's a high-caliber birthday, young lady.

from loveherwell :

happy, happy birthday!!! enjoy your day (even if it is a monday)!

from secret-motel :

Oh, I know you know THAT generation. So lovable, exasperating.

from loveherwell :

that last entry is so lovely, especially that last line.

from swordfern :

I love the glimpse into your b&b room. I can imagine the light and feel the soft bed beneath me. Beautiful.

from loveherwell :

he is! kill me! it's too adorable! hahaha :)

from loveherwell :

i really loved how you put this: "Anyways, you have to distinguish a life from a diary; living and the narrating of it are of course separate, however entangled." so happy to hear you got your second shot (even if it was terrible!).

from narcissa :

oof. I *agonized* over posting my last entry, unsure of who might come across it. You captured it so perfectly - an archive of imperfect impressions.

from annanotbob2 :

I never liked the look of rosa mundi from photographs - it looked gaudy and artificial. But when I saw one in the flesh, as it were, I loved it at once. Some roses are my favourite plants but some just aren't. xx

from annanotbob2 :

Best wishes. I think what helped me stop smoking for good (six years now, after fifty years of smoking - yuck) was saying. "Oh yes, that's a craving, it'll be gone soon," and they are and they do, then they start to spread out until they're gone.

from loveherwell :

congrats and good luck with quitting!!

from swordfern :

Just saying hi. As always, I'm over here quietly enjoying your writing. Best wishes on the quitting smoking journey; this seems like a time of transition and positive change for many of us.

from loveherwell :

thank you for your note -- that idea of "open affection" has stuck with me. you're right. i really liked your entry on 5/26. that feeling of possibility coming back to us... it's lovely.

from annanotbob2 :

Thank you xx

from annanotbob2 :

11/5 Love this - the sense of a possible future.

from amerla :

i rediscovered diaryland tonight reminiscing about the internet of old and found this diary of yours. it is so lovely.

from babyhead :

I think there is a lot of sorting of the past going on. I recently received a letter from an old friend apologizing for an misevent that happened 30 years ago. Frankly, I stumbled on how to respond.

from annanotbob2 :

You're tempting me to give them a go - I might seek out 'These Old Shades' which was my favourite. I read an article by Beth Nguyen in the New Yorker, about her name, which made me think of you and hope your experience had been better than that.

from annanotbob2 :

When I was a lass I used to love the Regency novels of Georgette Heyer, though I hesitate to recommend them in case they reveal hideous complicity with the patriarchal system - bound to really x

from ernst :

Magic Mountain was one of my first quarantine recommendations to friends, I read it during a completely different sort of "shared convalescence" (I was an art guard at The Met). Will def try to get my code sorted, OP, much appreciated.

from orangepeeler :

Hi Ernst! Thanks for the lovely note. Your notes are turned off, so I hope you will return to read this response. By all means, use the html. Happy writing and I look forward to reading your posts. :)

from ernst :

After a 10+ year absence from this "platform" (don't even know if that term had been coined when I made my d-land account back in '99) it is a pleasure to find you still sharing your well-considered shares Lady Orangepeeler. Your tone is as appreciated as ever and your constancy is, frankly, remarkable. I look forward to catching up w/the back-catalog. I've vowed to make a return to intermittent journaling myself, and, to that end - would you mind if I cribbed some basic structural HTML from your page? (I already have the code) I'll change up a lot of it of course, but you had a prescient, works-across-devices layout that the d-land templates never really addressed. If not no worries! Hope all is well across the pond, keep writing, please. - ee

from narcissa :

march22: loved that image... could practically see the irish equivalent of a tumbleweed rolling through town.

from narcissa :

March 17. Not surprised, and that’s so much worse.

from boombasticat :

Your March 7th knocked me out.

from narcissa :

Thank you for your note. I’m sorry that you had that experience. I want to thank you for sharing what you did, you captured it exactly. Although I know it, it’s still somehow such a relief to read your words and know I’m not crazy. It is very hard.

from annanotbob2 :

Move slow and mend things... I'm going to try x

from loveherwell :

thank you!! :)

from annanotbob2 :

I suddenly noticed tonight that your mother is younger than me, which has shifted everything around in my mind - I always assume everyone is more or less my age, including you. You conjure a vivid picture of her in my mind, full of secrets

from loveherwell :

this entry about your mother is beautiful.

from swordfern :

The Overstory is sitting on my shelf waiting to be read. Russell gave it to me, knowing my love of forests and descriptive writing. I hope that I enjoy it similarly, despite, perhaps, a lesser focus on plot.

from loveherwell :

thank you. i have been loving reading your descriptions of the weather, of how it looks when you're out walking.

from annanotbob2 :

Oh I am pleased you're getting paid for your writing, or some of it at least. I'm reading the New Tana French novel (The Searcher?), set in an Irish village, narrated by an American and it often makes me think of you. x

from swordfern :

"Isn’t that the point of travel, to be surprised?" You often illuminate life in new ways for me. Thank you.

from whitepigeon :

my self is so glad of your self

from annanotbob2 :

20/9 I copied a twitter thread to my blog about where we are now with this virus. It seemed quite depressing but also wise and a bit optimistic. Take care x

from loveherwell :

today's entry (9/2) rings so incredibly true for me. it feels impossible to rest, even, because there is always the nagging feeling of other things i should be doing to improve myself / my life / the lives of others / etc.

from annanotbob2 :

2/9 I love the last paragraph today. Yes, feel the sadness. x

from whystinger :

I have two methods. First I have one email account for when a store or merchant demands an email address. I just delete the contents once a week or month. I too have been unsubscribing from lists, but many come back two months later when they buy a new list. Very frustrating and is why I started the other email account just for marketers

from secret-motel :

"I've been unsubscribing from everything, and it feels good, like how I imagine it would feel after a colonic cleanse." This is the funniest fuckin' thing I've read in a while.

from swordfern :

Unsubscribing from everything is satisfying and freeing. And then I keep refreshing my inbox feeling lonely and unpopular, even though the GAP and Seth Godin are not real friends. :/

from annanotbob2 :

25/8 Yeah. Mine is Viktor Klemperer, a German Jewish Professor of linguistics, who kept a diary from 1933 to 1945, on scraps of paper, hidden by his friends, all on pain of death if caught. Published as I Shall Bear Witness. He was a bit of a hypochondriac and moaned a lot about petty things, but I often think, come on, if Viktor could do it, you can. Just bloody write.

from loveherwell :

if i can say one positive thing about the pandemic, it's that it has renewed my absolute love and pleasure in reading. at least, if nothing else, we have books to look forward to.

from swordfern :

your poppy entry is so beautiful.

from babyhead :

Always love to read your posts, but 6.23 takes the cake, and coming from a pastry baker that is cherished.

from loveherwell :

thank you! making positive steps, little by little.

from secret-motel :

A hearty congratulations on getting that piece accepted! May there be many more acceptance letters coming your way.

from loveherwell :

congrats!!

from annanotbob2 :

Congratulations! I'm not surprised - your writing is so lyrical, beautiful, even when you write about a boring evening in a small town pub, it reads like a mystical event. xx

from loveherwell :

that should be my new mantra. it is so hard to have to keep learning the same lessons over and over again, to see that progress is never a straight line. thank you.

from loveherwell :

your latest entry is something i’ve been mulling over recently (though we are in circumstances). i too find it interesting these societal roles placed upon us based solely on whether or not we have children. i wish i had something of worth to say about it, but i don’t — just that it’s on my mind as well, just that (as i know you’re aware) we’re full of worth either way.

from boombasticat :

Wow. Beautiful. And that's a great quote.

from swordfern :

Your note helped me feel supported and cared for. Thank you.

from annanotbob2 :

5/5/20 My eyes slid over the fact that all this happened before lockdown - I was getting really agitated at the thought of you in a crowded pub, and Ireland, everyone going so wild, so unsafe. But all good. Phew.

from swordfern :

Field notes. Yes. And same back to you - always beautiful, your writing.

from loveherwell :

thank you! i like this idea of field notes.

from annanotbob2 :

https://www.stayathomefringe.co.uk/ Just spotted another lit festival in case you’re interested x

from annanotbob2 :

Hahaha! My dog does that - bastards, showing us up in public with their bad behaviour!

from annanotbob2 :

I didn't scroll down to see how long it's on for - ends tomorrow - wah! I loved your entry - I keep getting flashes like this - here it's all garden and yoga and no news on tv or radio - seems wrong to be this chilled, but I am, mostly x

from annanotbob2 :

Might there be anything on here that interests you? It's a literary festival all live online https://stayathomefest.wordpress.com/ xx

from swordfern :

"Catastrophe has been a familiar presence in my life, and this pandemic presents nothing new in terms of psychological stress." it's as though you did a surgery on my brain and extracted one of my exact thoughts. Your writing -as always - is such a gift. Your style, your observations, your candour. Sending love.

from annanotbob2 :

Thank goodness for dogs and beaches xx

from annanotbob2 :

Oh, you are losing so many people aren't you? I am so sorry. Hugs xx

from boombasticat :

I'm sorry for all your loss, but your memories of the photos of the lodge and of the eyelids are something. Thanks for telling us about it.

from annanotbob2 :

That Marcus Aurelius quote is exactly what I needed, thank you

from annanotbob2 :

23/1/20 Yes! I dream of this too - thank you for articulating it xx

from annanotbob2 :

I hear you. x

from whitepigeon :

love you, o'peeler

from narcissa :

Dec 20: xo

from annanotbob2 :

20/12 I hear you x

from swordfern :

Every entry that you write is a gift. Thank you.

from swordfern :

I am in a very beautiful place, at least it feels that way to me. I am humbled at the gifts that life continues to offer me. I am always happy to see your name in red on my buddy list. xoxo

from narcissa :

10/17: god, those casual punch in the gut racist moments. i know it. UGH

from loveherwell :

thank you :)

from swordfern :

"... while mine are loosely attended, by the both of us, because they are so vaguely defined." This resonates with me deeply.

from annanotbob2 :

This is the anniversary of my dad's death too, but in 1997. Sending hugs across the Irish Sea and thanks for your beautiful writing and your supportive comments. Wishing you peace

from swordfern :

Your writing brings me such peace. Your beautiful descriptions of people, of places. I slow down a bit after reading you and take a much needed deep breath. Thank you.

from annanotbob2 :

Thank you. On we go, really, just on we go.

from annanotbob2 :

14/08 Tonight's entry lifted my jaded spirit. The very name of yer lad Two Pony Tony and then the snogging musicians. Thank you x

from raven72d :

I love the quote from Cixous.

from boombasticat :

Congrats on the poem! That's very cool.

from boombasticat :

Thank you for your kindness. And my condolences to you, on your loss of not so long ago. Speaking of Galway, and of "dirty 30s," I just finished Sally Rooney's novel Normal People, which is more "dirty 20s," but, still, it knocked me out.

from swordfern :

I started reading you via Narcissa a while back. I'm not sure why we hadn't become friends long ago. Your writing speaks to my heart. Sending love.

from annanotbob2 :

27/5/19 My thoughts are with you xx

from loveherwell :

recently read The Field Guide to Getting Lost (by Solnit). that quote captures so much.

from annanotbob2 :

22/5/19 That resonated strongly with me. I've been trapped indoors for weeks with a growing urge for 'home' telling me that wherever it is, it's not here.

from annanotbob2 :

25/3 That's a remarkable life journey - at least to my coddled British ears. And from no formal education to a doctorate in one generation - wow. I am in awe of you both xx

from annanotbob2 :

25/3 That's a remarkable life journey - at least to my coddled British ears. And from no formal education to a doctorate in one generation - wow. I am in awe of you both xx

from narcissa :

3/24:What a long journey. Hope you’ll have some space to rest now and soak up the spring. Well done.

from annanotbob2 :

xxx

from annanotbob2 :

Thank you, and to you.

from narcissa :

congratulations dr orangepeeler! (or if you prefer, Dr Phil). I hope you are enjoying doing nothing.. or doing everything... or at the very least the joy of having nothing weighing on your mind.

from annanotbob2 :

Congratulations and good work, Dr Phil!

from annanotbob2 :

We have a houseful of mice since our old cat died, and have had to take action. They take themselves to the big, now empty, shelf in the larder to die and lie on their backs, clasping their tiny paws together, as if they've been laid out. It is heartbreaking to be killing such creatures, but I can't manage to accept them into my house and larder, to eat through everything.

from annanotbob2 :

25/10 - oh a wren - magic - what a gift

from narcissa :

10-10: thank you for the note and just generally for putting your writing out here. Reading your Sept 29 entry from a very dark place, i *felt* a flicker of that expansiveness and it reminded me of other times.

from loveherwell :

the way you write is beautiful and truly places your reader right where you are. i hope you're doing well, even on a grim day.

from annanotbob2 :

I stopped smoking for nine months in my 2nd year at uni but started again with the dissertations written in the summer 'break' - how can a person write without having a quick fag each time they need to pause, to reread a sentence, a paragraph? I used to emerge from the writing to find I was in a thick fug of smoke, with overflowing ashtray and ash all around. I started again and smoked altogether for fifty years, which I do not recommend. I feel pleased that your lyrical entry today made me remember but not yearn.

from annanotbob2 :

I love your words. Thank you for posting - landing on your diary sometimes feels like nourishment x

from narcissa :

04-Sept-18: thanks, i think all ok. *exhales*

from annanotbob2 :

That's a great horoscope!

from annanotbob2 :

2nd July - congratulations!

from bombasine :

01 july - congratulations!!

from annanotbob2 :

I used to teach that poem - a lot of the kids came to love it. I like the end: "Between my finger and my thumb The squat pen rests. I'll dig with it. "

from annanotbob2 :

I love reading your blog. I'm quite poorly and can't read much 'literature' so your beautifully chosen words are like little drops of honey, nourishing my jaded spirit. Thank you x

from narcissa :

apr 12 - amazing. congratulations!

from secret-motel :

Yeah, maybe part of the appeal is that that sort of heaven would appeal to few people. If I'm going to be anywhere forever, I hope it's a place with some elbow room. Youknowimsayin? Like dying in an airline disaster wouldn't be so bad, if I was the only passenger. But having all these crying, screaming Earthlings around me as the plane falls from the sky? No, thank you.

from narcissa :

3-28: i feel the pang between the period and the anyways. Thank you for this entry and the image of these landscapes of grace, as you called them. I appreciated the thought so much.

from narcissa :

2/14: congratulations!!! that's amazing.

from narcissa :

Tori in my late 30s makes *way* more sense than Tori in my teens. This has been a great rediscovery.

from narcissa :

good luck with this chunk! you're getting there. oof, dissertating in january is no joke, i hope you have some nice treats built into the days

from narcissa :

thanks.. in fact, i already have a job - just in a different city than the one I want to live in. So sometimes I flirt with the idea of moving there to be a crossing guard or whatever. : / Hope your writing is going well -- glacial pace or no, continental drift is still movement.

from moonbeams :

Your writing style is absolutely beautiful...and if you're not currently working in a field related to professional writing then frankly I would be surprised. Thank you for sharing your entries.

from secret-motel :

I'm with YOU, sister. I usually have to have a drink or two before calling my mother. And then another close at hand while on the phone with her.

from dangerspouse :

She didn't specify it has to be YOUR baby, right? Problem solved.

from boombasticat :

Oh, thank you. You're very kind. Sounds like you might be a writer?

from narcissa :

thank you for your 12/15 entry. It comes back to me from time to time, when i need it.

from whitepigeon :

I'll blip here forever more + hope you do, too

from boombasticat :

I hadn't heard of the Crace but will check it out. You might like Find Me by Laura van den Berg and, my favorite, The Dog Stars by Peter Heller.

from boombasticat :

Which post-apocalyptic books are you reading? (There are so many these days!)

from narcissa :

10-24: Lovely, thanks for sharing that picture. Grief is so hard, take care.

from whystinger :

I am very sorry for your loss.

from boombasticat :

Thanks for your kind note. I am very sorry for your loss. All the best and hang in there.

from secret-motel :

Ah, thank you. For some reason, that entry I wrote last night no longer shows up on my end. By the way, I'm very sorry to hear about your father. Losing a beloved parent is a rough one. Psychic hearts. --hrld--

from whitepigeon :

happiest born-time, o'peeler (we're the same age) :)

from narcissa :

I'm sorry, that's so heartbreaking. take care.

from bombasine :

so tremendously sorry for your loss.

from secret-motel :

Howdy. Thanks for the note! Actually, I kind of hope that my writing doesn't resonate with anyone. I wish a lot of it didn't resonate with or from me. But, ah well, cards dealt, dice rolled, choices made, reasons reasoned, all that, etc..

from narcissa :

9/8/17: (SOS) - oh, writing in the summers is particularly the worst. did you ever hear that story about "bird by bird"? That's how I got through mine. line. by. painful. line. Good luck to you finding that turret!

from narcissa :

Apr 30/17 - really appreciated your beauty capture of the process of a random set of rooms becoming home. For me it's always so startling when it actually happens after such a long time waiting.

from raven72d :

30 April 17--- I quite like your entries. Please do keep writing at D-Land!

from raven72d :

Your 31 Jan 16 entry--- that does say a lot. I've been writing here since June 2002, and your entry hit home.

from raven72d :

Very nice entries--- good diary.

from whystinger :

You are welcome. I see another of my comments and must say that I have been working on an online Yoga class and it sometimes kicks my ass, but that is good. Shaky arms, legs, core muscles...

from whystinger :

I have been gone for a while, life and work drawing me in and not giving me time to read or write. I must say that your writing has taken a delicious turn again, making me think "wow, how awesome is this writing." Thank you.

from whitepigeon :

cheers to fully tilting into the future, o'peeler <3

from whystinger :

I need to get my fanny back into a yoga class. I did start looking around Orlando, but the studios I found convenient were "not for me" as advised by a Yoga teacher. Mostly the ones that were convenient were big into "Hot Yoga" and I am not into that. I need to put that back on my todo list.

from orangepeeler :

Thank you, whystinger.

from whystinger :

04/08/16 entry. Beautiful.

from whystinger :

Re: your 11/09/15 entry... rang a bit too close to home. Excellent capture in a few words.

from narcissa :

gah! the labyrinth you're describing is my life.

from stardumb :

Thanks! Ur diary is a breathe of fresh air after it hasn't rained for a while. Ur words pile, pun, and saturate tho delicate true and full of the poetism needed to style hair and dress well namely that I find something I can relate to, enjoy reading and and admire. Thanks for continuing to write and update. Xo

from jaysthoughts :

Just checking to see how many diarylanders still actually check their notes and stay active.

from boombasticat :

"After disaster or newly hatched life."

from elberry :

Enjoyed! Thanks.

from raven72d :

A quote from Gaston Bachelard? Excellent.

from boombasticat :

Beautiful.

from corposant :

35 is a great age to be. And you should always be a child, for at least 80% of your day.

from stardumb :

great, thanks

from stardumb :

can i have a password? ;0

from whitepigeon :

No password-email (yet) + oh, no!

from whitepigeon :

May I be passworded, 'peeler?

from heer :

hello. a branch reaches out from this tree, to you.

from orderwine :

i'm sure it will.

from ernst :

Well stated. The lacuna between muse and sandwich, I�ve had a tough time bridging that one myself.

from orangepeeler :

Stardumb: That bit of genius belongs to Dorianne Laux. Whitepigeon: I'm leaning on my balcony, trying to catch the sound of your chimes...

from stardumb :

loved you're latest poem. delicious to the soul and brilliant.

from whitepigeon :

Shaking a sweet mess of notes out of a SoCal apartment-patio wind chime for you, today.

from stardumb :

i absolutely love your diary and your style. amazing. :)

from illiac :

go on, little phoenix!

from boombasticat :

Bang! Wham! That was fun.

from whitepigeon :

here's to the perfume of a rotting bunch :)

from whitepigeon :

I've got a couple of bananas for you.

from bornearly :

Thank you for your post today (7/12.) I love reading every one. I'm not here so often any more (moved to Wordpress) but you are always an inspiration, even while writing about not being inspired. Blessings to you. - Bornearly (www.madagnes.com)

from pettyquarrel :

I just discovered your journal. I adore it.

from whitepigeon :

as a (fellow?) PhD'er in Lit., I'm relating+ to your 10/13 entry. I want Sontagian exactitude, Didionic cool (or vice-versa?).

from pondlife :

I login after several weeks absence, and everything becomes illuminated; you're the reason I've been dreaming of Siam dancers.

from pondlife :

I have to warn you, that sort of flattery will get you everywhere. Thanks for the compliment, I don't know how beautiful it is though. And with anonymity on my side, it's probably been a little too honest at times. But you, I'm in awe of the landscapes you paint. And jealous. The older I get the less I write, and when I do it seems terribly mundane, boring. Where are you? I've wondered from time to time. I divide my time these days between Charleston, SC and East Sussex, England. My partner and I recently spent two weeks in Denmark, which was just stunning. And I have plans for Prague, Budapest and Vienna-I enjoy traveling obviously. Wow, I really rambled on there a bit. Ahem...

from hthespy :

Just doing my part to make everyone as bummed out as I am, heh heh. But really, I'll be ok.

from pondlife :

Let me know if you would like a password.

from pondlife :

Last Goodbye and Hallelujah are favourites. Your writing is amazing, but you probably already know that. Just really rather lovely, all of it.

from lobo21 :

On a Sunday morn' a passed by and instead of carying on, your words struck me in such a way that I had to stop and say 'hi" Neighbourly of me eh? No, I just wanted to say, with your permission of course, that I would like to pass this way again. Funny thing about the heart, one of our most powerful organs also happens to be one of the most fragile. Curious to me why we are always trying to give it away. Thank you for making me ponder.

from pondlife :

Wondering which Jeff Buckley song would be on repeat? Your thoughts tonight are lovely and dark and all too familiar.

from whitepigeon :

Lovely o'peeler, email me at [email protected] and I'll give you a password. best, stephanie

from crestone :

Such a wonderful O'hara quote--wasn't he so wise beyond his years?

from raven72d :

the 'portrait of a marriage' entry was powerful...

from pondlife :

Thanks for adding me, nice to be mutually admired. Very nice diary.

from raven72d :

rather lovely entries...

from goodluckgold :

heyyy love profileee!!!!!

from crestone :

thanks! i'm looking forward to being a student again, but am going to miss california terribly!

from secret-blue :

Totally love today's entry (5/29). Very well written and soulful :o)

from crestone :

brilliant may 21 entry. i loved that!

from crestone :

thanks for the super nice note!

from softblossoms :

how funny! i'm writing in a new space and a few days ago wrote something sort of similar, about fruit and yogurt and honey. i'll add you over yonder so you can see what i mean.

from hthespy :

this entry was SO GOOD. i love it.

from mountainhick :

the sky cracks with light as the rain falls fast and thunder storms outside my door and its you touching base from a land afar. Living not knowing one day to the next in this place I now call home I search yours poems and thoughts of the past and the world around you. always keeping an eye out and an open door to my dreams.

from softblossoms :

glad to hear it! country nights... i'm envious.

from softblossoms :

your writing is so magical

from bluperspex :

why thank yee. an for you to. hope it's delish!

from bluperspex :

a merry, merry to you - may it be blessed and utterly fabulous!

from rocketsauce :

THANK YOU, YOU LOVELY SPECIMAN OF A PERSON WHOM I DO NOT KNOW.

from rocketsauce :

its ok. i guess i messed up. no worries. enjoy your new home! be sure to write about it. i'm sure you dont need me to tell you that though.

from rocketsauce :

oh gosh i never check my notes! i am 13 st marks #6r ny ny 10003 i need yours again too! its waiting!

from spindle :

and in the end, it worked out brilliantly. I found a novel by Anne Hebert that I haven't read yet, I picked up Jonathan Safran Foer's new novel and this memoir I have had my eyes on for a year now, of growing up as a Muslim girl in Bengali. I am set now. and I have to admit: as much as I am coming to dislike it, there are a handful of really tangible benefits to working in a bookstore.

from softblossoms :

o, thanks for your note! i had an incredible week in a forest fairyland (sore neck now from looking up at the warblers).

from softblossoms :

o my, it was amazing. one hopped down onto a low branch and i was able to admire so closely! compare birdnotes, certainly. i'm curious about the birdlife in n.CA, which is where you are, yes?

from rocketsauce :

i love your diary too! it's so special! keep it up.

from softblossoms :

o thank you! and o! you're a birder! are you library folk, too? (saw jessamyn in your links)

from idrewmyship :

i dont know where the shore is. if its the future, i'ma stay in bed. i'm glad you cry too. sometimes i wish someone was around to lick away my salt-tears.

from bluperspex :

i want packages and letters!

from spindle :

I see things that are horribly dead lying in the street. they turn into plastic bags, drifts of leaves, pages from a newspaper. sometimes they end up actually being dead things, but if they are, they're never horrible. they can't summon the same revulsion a dirty broken bottle in the corner of my eye can.

from he-left-me :

i just started this public diary, so im letting every1 know that they can leave an entry whenever they want. if u have any comments feel free to leave me a note.

from clitty :

I think that dork-wad was just trying to be friendly and racially open. No need to get all worked up, just answer her question.

from dork-wad :

Hi I'm hispanic. Are you indian?

from bluperspex :

that... was the most beautiful thing i have read in so long...

from novembre :

my diary is locked for the time being because i happened upon a very nosy family member. to read novembre, just say "hello" twice.

from orangepaw :

Oranges rule :D

from foxynracer :

peeling oranges! ha thats great I love oranges!

from fucked-raw :

♥

from santacruzer :

Hey, thanks for joining the Cambodia ring. It's great to have another fan of the beautiful country. Your writing is profound.

from neighborhood :

p., it would not let me sign your book again, but here goes: i believe you will find said poem on said page in said anthology entitled "from totems to hip-hop" or something to that effect. quite so., a.

from keeds :

you're an orangepeeler..how insightful can you be.

from shamsi9 :

where have you been all my diaryland life?

from talularuth :

why do you like toni morrison? What have you read?

from asteroidbelt :

who are the len brown society?

from kif :

i'm always word-shy here but wanted to make a small deposit for all i withdrawal from here.

from boyrepellant :

i like your diary immensely--too bad you don't have your aim turned on, you would be cool to talk to. check out my page and let me know what you think.

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