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hi rob your message made me happy, i saved it even to listen ot tomorrow (: so thanks, it is flattering that people remember stuff like birthdays. let me know details about trip and i'll try to figure out my weekend. current me status: confused and trying to figure it all out. but i love the ocean, as you know and would enjoy seeing it once again. how is rob? xx

from caspergrey :

I can's go to henry although I'd love to. I couldn't weasel out of my swing shift/standby that night. Plus I'm working on a case with the sheriff's office that day. Give him a kiss for me and tell him he'll always be sexy. KT

from caspergrey :

Hey Rob, here's a pick up line: I'll whip you silly and fuck you stupid...-The Way of the Gun

from caspergrey :

Hey Rob, what do you think about the KKK? I would like to hear your thoughts. I want to go see Rollins by the way. I will check my work schedule tomorrow.

from robsucks :

Where to start.....you are an idiot (and in your recent pictures you look like Butter from South Park when he glued testicles to his face). Do you ever stop and think before you do these retarded stunts? Wait...sorry...I forgot you are incapable of thinking. Why would you scream out you are a homosexual with AIDS? Are you trying to perpetuate the stereotype that many ignorant people, such as yourself, believe or were you just trying to get killed? Why did you also just let your friend get his ass kicked? Just a little bit of advice for you....call 911 when 20 guys are kicking anybody in the middle of the street. You freaking tard! And why do you insist on showing people you penis? NOBODY WANTS IT! STOP! You are one of the reasons Davis sucks. You really are on the road to becoming a janitor...possibly a carnie. Your pic of Jackson licking your face was quite nice..maybe you might want to read a book by Freud.

from caspergrey :

Hey Rob. I saw Hank at the Phoenix awhile ago and in SF in January I think it was. He did spoken word there. I love my part animal part machine shirt. Anyway. I was really drunk and now my arm hurts. I think it feels good. I love my dreams. Only not the ones where friends die or I die. I always remember, therefore I have many to share. Sorry I was so stupid at the party. It's been a long time since I got to be just a stupid young person. Can't say I didn't have fun though.

from robsucks :

You are lame....and an idiot.

from robsucks :

You have hit an all time low. The low that a meth addict hits when they have no job and need more smack. You drank your own piss. Why are you surprised that girls don't like you? First of all, you're exposing your penis and making noises with it. Exposing it would have been enough to scare any girls off, but you had to make noises with it as well. Of course, that is probably the only thing you do well with your penis. As many others agree, your sexual prowess is a joke. Maybe you and your penis can start a traveling freak show...your penis can make noises and you can drink your own piss. I can see it now....Rob Roy and his trusty sidekick, Nasty Dick. Watch as Rob guzzles his own urine while Nasty Dick plays Dueling Banjos with his foreskin. Really you are just disgusting. Second, that was not the first time a girl has laughed at your penis. Trust me, many laugh about your penis on a daily basis. It's tiny, hooded, and scary need I say more(Warts). Third, nobody wants a mustache ride....it's not the unbelievable experience that you think it is. Girls would rather have bamboo splinters pushed under their finger nails and set on fire.

from robsucks :

Rob, no one thinks that you are smart enough or computer literate enough to alter that picture on your own. I can't believe you would try to take credit for that Captain Morgan photo yourself. When I emailed it to you, I wanted you to see yourself as everyone else sees you: a drunken mutation who should stop attempting to breed. I wanted you to A. notice how much that hideous mustache makes you look like a pirate and B. notice how that constantly-welded-to-your-hand bottle of liquor makes you look like a lush who is a walking rum ad. I didn't even need to draw the Captain Morgan 'stache and goatee on your face because nature already put them there. Since you, an English Major, have no problems with plagiarism (wonder if all that "creative and brilliant writing" is even your own?), I thought I'd steal a tune for you and write a little ditty. Here goes: (To the Tune of "The Beverly Hillbillies Theme") Come and listen to a story �bout a guy named Rob Life is so pathetic; it will likely make you sob Drinks his weight in alcohol every single day Must be mad at his liver and hopes it�ll go away. Cirrhosis, that is, Hepatitis, not attractive Well, what do you know, Rob keeps a diary here Writes about his problems, keeps on trying to persevere The city of fair Davis really is the place he ought to be Fits in there with the freaks, geeks, liberals and hippies. But homeless he is, sleeps in a car Well now it�s time to say goodbye to all Rob�s remaining pride Tries to score with women but always he is denied. If I were him, I would be glad that girls will only flirt When you are that drunk you know your penis doesn�t work. Impotence that is, point and laugh Ya�ll run away from him, y�hear? P.S. Rob that hat you wore today was very ugly.

from bleedingnerd :

Rob you are so sexy.

from robsucks :

First, all of those who have not had sex with Robert Alexander Roy are not allowed to comment about sex with Robert Alexander Roy. Second, Rob destined to become your father. He was a communist with crazy ideas, but now he's just a janitor who is unhappy with his job, living in a trailer, hoarding a fort knox size porn stash while fighting alcoholism. As for Slothra, you obviously have never been laid and I have some waiting for me at home. I wasn't making a comment or argument about whether or not a girl can cum.....I was just stating the fact that a girl can not cum in Rob Roy's presence...because he sucks...freaking femme-nazi.

from slothra :

rob roy, please don't stop your journal. if a girl can't handle the honesty of your journal, maybe she isn't the right girl for you. i think your philosophical ramblings about love and sex are sublime. as for robsucks, i don't understand why it's so hard to believe that a girl can get off on rob roy. i can get off on rob roy. the only thing remotely unnatural about getting off on rob roy is the fact that i can't seem to call rob roy anything but "rob roy," and, well, that can be a little weird. however, there are endless role-playing opportunities available that i have yet to explore. to assume that a girl can't come as easily as a man is to assume that she was put on earth only to reproduce and never to enjoy the same pleasures that are available to a man. contrary to popular opinion, that is simply untrue. rob's story is entirely feasible. even if it wasn't true, a woman is responsible for getting what she wants out of a sexual encounter. if she hasn't cum, she needs to say/do whatever will get her there. if she opts out, that's her choice. and oftentimes that choice is made because she's afraid to communicate what she wants. as long as both are satisfied with the outcome, who fucking cares? while rob roy was getting some, robsucks was sitting in front of a computer, reading this fucking journal.

from robsucks :

I don't even know where to start with you today. What the hell? First of all, I am very glad to hear that your renedevous didn't end up actually being anything but pathetic and sad. That poor lush would have woke up with a std. Besides that you sick bastard...what are you doing with a seventh grader that looks resembles your mom? Does she she use yarn as a hair accessory? That's just sick on too many levels for me to touch on.....underage mother look-a-like....possibly midget mother look-a-like. NASTY! Double nasty that she came from making out with you. I think somebody has stretched the truth a little. Girls don't cum when they have sex with you. How did she cum from making out with you? Your tongue skills leave much to be desired. Frankly, I don't want to get into your ability to "rub up" on girls. Really...it must stop.

from robsucks :

I can't believe this incessant rambling you call a diary. Seriously, girls aren't flirting with you. I am beginning to believe that the warts are going to your brain....maybe you have syphilis and that is causing these dilusions. You really need to be thinking about your future. Really you can't make a living out of being a UC Davis Captian Hook look alike. Not going to happen.

from bleedingnerd :

Rob, you know I love you, but you really really should give me a Zwan Poster you little asshole. Shaq and Kobe suck. See you at the strip club.

from robsucks :

An Ode to Rob Roy-Remix You're an ass You have no class You get drunk and try to make out with girls This only makes them hurl You have warts and you suck at sexual sports You're nuts are droopy You're penis is spooky Please get sterilized before I kick you so hard your penis is paralized. Now for some advice. Rob, I know why you are an English major. You think you can be a high school English teacher. Contrary to what you think, you are not smart enough or even close to being cute enough to trick some sixteen year old cheerleader into having sex with you as extra credit......you sick bastard. Even by some sick, twisted chance that it did happen (not a snow ball's chance in hell), the only good that would come of it is that you would be thrown in prison for ten years and get raped daily by some very huge, grisly man named Bubba (don't drop the soap, dude). Even better would be that you would have to marry the underage girl after she had your deformed child....which would mean that you would have to move to some trailer park in backwoods Alabama. The only thing you could write poems about then is whter or not you should suck start a shot gun.

from robsucks :

An Ode to Rob Roy Your thoughts are like pennies nobody wants them. Your poems are like crap they stink. Your mind is like a balloon it's full of air. Your personality is like a puddle it's not deep. Your sexual skills are like a vacuum they suck. Your intelligence is like a unicorn it's a myth. Your penis is like jello it's green and wiggly. Your dork is like mold it should be sprayed with bleach daily. Your manhood is like califlower that's just what it looks like.

from babyjahlove :

I want to see the video of you doing the "Tie-Dye Pogo"....I knew you'd do it - wish I was there to see it in person.

from design-doll :

http://www.surespeed.net/writeclub.gif check that out rob... it's hot and sexy... if you want mike to make it a template &make it work, give him a buzz or e-mail... kkk heard all about yoru happy klan thing from my roommate of all people! sorry i wasn't there to see it... thinking bout you xx kristin

from dianabee :

Dude- i thought "nonetheless" was one word--but what would i know- YOU'RE the English major. Look at me, leaving a note so your guestbook won't look big--I am such a bitch like that. Two more things: 1. I wouldn't pay any amount of money to promote anything involving you and a speedo (no offense), and 2. You are an ass :)

from dianabee :

here is an example of my writing robroy--tell me what you think: "trying to keep up with you're diary is like... something else that is really difficult." with all the shit you include, i'm surprised you don't write about your bowel movements. perhaps that's something to consider in the future.

from design-doll :

"His responses are entirely visceral, not cerebral; his intelligence is a mere tool in the services of his drives and needs; he is incapable of mental passion, mental interaction; he can't relate to anything other than his own physical sensations." valerie solanas... i'm sorry bout tonite... i had a drama and then an almost stand up by a girlfriend earlier tonite and it put me in an awful mood... now i sit here and contemplate staying up all nite, maybe i'll see you tomorrow... some people click and some don't... it's actually strange for me not to like someone, but i dunno, i remain firm on this... i was insulted and made felt like a fool... i don't want to play games and i'll just be myself... i've come a long way in the past four years and *others* will too.

from design-doll :

i admire your honesty in writing... i'm sorry bout last nite, i just need to figure some things out... thanks for understanding... and i love your writing, while some are shocked, i really do think it's genius.

from design-doll :

as always, the evening commenced into one of mind genius... thank you for the brilliant conversation and thoughts. ta rob roy, may you have enriched dreams of egyptian princess swimming in cherry garcia trampolines. :)

from design-doll :

funny robroy... i woke up with a nightmare as you were writing bout your day... being home has been quite odd and i'm wondering who i am... i wrote a poem today bout you and dan, funny the words just flowed out of my pen like i wasn't even writing... i can't wait to go back to davis... the time here at home just drudges into the next.

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