messages to satellitebob:
(click here to add new message):

from bettyford :
I was just in "The Worth" for work. I had a late flight out so I toured the sixth floor museum. Then I randomly clicked on your diary and you mentioned the theater where they found crazy Mr. Oswald. WEIRD, huh? sorta. I like your diary abd I think there is something wrong with your guest book.
from dooki :
Yes...they have beer. And I think I saw you the other day. Leaving Ships...I was coming in with two dudes...on a Thursday. Last week. Hmmm. Anyway, West End Comedy Theater. You can smoke, you can drink. BUT...$5 cover at the door. lame, I know. But HEY! you get to see mE!
from heelandlass :
Ooh, new CD. Yes please. I didn't bring mine in today to post to you - I promise to do it this week, none of this letting it drag on for weeks on end. That's a promise. Hope you had a good sleep, lovely to talk to you today. Kiss Kiss Kiss. Love from me over here xxxx
from heelandlass :
Laughing WITH me isn't nearly as bad. I will let you then. And the old lady in the shower, well I made a couple of calls and it's all set up. You just have to come over here now. P.S - Have another CD for you. Will post it after the weekend, it's a goodie. In my humble opinion.......
from heelandlass :
He is a perv isn't he? Don't pretend you don't like it! I can't believe you'd point and laugh at me if I fell off my bike. That is a very unfriendly thing to say. I'm not letting you stay in my house when you come to visit. I will make you get a B&B and it will be frightening because B&Bs are frightening and you'll have to sleep with nylon sheets and be forced to share a shower with the old lady that owns it. Oh wait. You'd like that. I did fall off my bike as a matter of fact, but it was a small fall into a big high tuft of grass so I didn't hurt myself. Could have done with that beer though.
from buck88 :
jesus wept, shes left you loads of notes, you know how she worries, why did you put loads of handsome photos up and then RESTRICT ACSESS TO UR LIFE?. huh?.... whats the score bob?. password pls now. and more handsome photos. maybe less clothes. ew. i am a perv. sorry but...well, thats just how it is.
from heelandlass :
Are you EVER going to tell us what's been going on in your life? Or at least go online so you can tell ME what's going on in your life! I miss it. xxx
from heelandlass :
well, they don't call you the bad mofo for nuffin. you are the baddest mo fo in town. heh, ladies love it. old ladies love it. xxx
from heelandlass :
hahahahahah it must be an american thing. thank fuck. Well, you know - get it where you can. If the ladies love billy, and you take the ladies to billy, then the ladies will love jason. You sly fox you. I like your style...
from heelandlass :
If I didn't love you so much I would judge you 100% on that last note you left me and based on the elton john/billy joel thing I wouldn't be the most impressed chicka in town. I'm just saying...
from heelandlass :
Imagine someone laughing VERY VERY hard right now = got it? Okay. Hahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahah. I can't tell you how funny that is that you know what the cycle of life thing is. hahahahahahahah I can't tell you how funny it is that I have just realised that's Elton John. funny and sad. Very sad. VERY FUCKING FUNNY though. we are dimwits Jason. xxx
from heelandlass :
hehe, cycle of life. Isn't that some kind of creepy disney film? cycle of being fucked. That's me and you that is. traa laaa laa fucked up foreverrrr, me and you looo looo loo
from dooki :
No, I'm not going. Two of my friends got mugged down there in broad day light...as well as another friend who got shivved. So...deep ellum and I aren't friends anymore. Have fun...bring some mace.
from dooki :
I hate you for making me think of my cousin having a 3 way. If you saw him, you'd understand. he has a "self made" tattoo of the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland...as well as several "self made" spider web tattoos. So...thanks for the visual. You <i>should</i> write porn.
from heelandlass :
Haha, who are you kidding? You haven't got a hangover from reading about my weekend - you have a hang over anyway my friend! And you thought you'd fooled me. I'm no fool!
from dooki :
I love Cafe Izmir too! They are expensive. The Wing Place is called "Pluckers". The phone number is 214-363-9464. They are the best wings ever. They have burgers, baked potatoes, sandwiches, chicken tenders, fried mushrooms...etc. And 17 sauces to choose for your wings. i think a 5 pc order is 4.95, or you can get a three tender 5 wing combo for 5.95, which comes with a side order. Wow...I sound like I work there. I eat too much wings.
from heelandlass :
Definitely give it a looksee. It's worth a shot I reckon. Hey - happy birthday for Sunday. xxxx
from heelandlass :
where are you satellite? it's been 7 days now. do i need to call the cops?
from dooki :
They also serve Stella Atoris at the Meridian Room. I went there Wednesday and had some. Tastes like Miller High Life without the aftertaste. Mondays are half price draughts. Good shit.
from cruel-irony :
Thanks for playing along - it's been fun. It'd be more fun with beer though. Just saying. I'll have to check out some of your tunes.
from heelandlass :
I have actually listened to that tune again and again and again and...again. There's another one too, I'll tell you what it is when I get home and see the tracklist. We've figured out a way to get our vinyl and mini discs onto our 'puter. I think Bry wants to do you a CD now too! He's got some damn good techno he wants to share. I had a (nother) dream about you last night. you came to visit and everybody was going 'there's an american in your house' and we kept getting you to say words in your american accent because it was cool. Hmm. Maybe you should come for a visit though you know, if you ever just happened upon 500. Oh - song number 2 is good on 'other' too. Lots of good ones. can't pick.
from heelandlass :
I forgot the play list again - the first tune is a flaming lips song which I love, it's beautiful. I'm really into it. I have to listen to the texas one more. I've had your 'other' on repeat most of the day again. Here I go - your 'texas' one is in the machine now. Okay. Let you know how it goes!
from wherwhenwhy :
Want to hear something funny, one of my firends is trying to set up an "artists" football team, with the hope of getting and artiists leaque together around the country, with the ultimate aim of setting up a artists world cup, all done in a very serious art project. He got this idea by finding out that there is a priests world cup, which doesnt make it any moe serious because I keep having visions of Father Ted. So if you know any footballers that can draw I will happily put them in touh with him. lots of love
from heelandlass :
I love my CDs! I love my hand written drunken note! I love my new stickers! I am listening to your 'other' at the moment. I have left your drunken note at home so I don't know the track listings but I am concentrating on the CD so much I'm not getting any work done. I will give you a better update/review when I have had a proper chance to listen to them both. So far, so good. Lovely xxx
from heelandlass :
Hmm. Nothing sexual to worry about huh? Okay. I'll take your seed of reassurance and run with it!
from dooki :
Thanks...I finally figured out how to host images on diaryland without being a member...ha ha ha!!!!! And pink is the new black, jason. it's the new black.
from satellitebob :
its ok not to read to entire thing, you picked up on the most important part, open hand swats all around! all that other stuff was me working off the hangover.
from buck88 :
maybe i didnt make quite to end....... but... ..i'd still like an open hand swat to my behind tho.
from dooki :
We went to Austin to visit friends. No gamblers for us. And I've asked Doodie many times about the difficulty of peeing. You know what he said? "I'm a cartoon." What an asshole.
from wherwhenwhy :
All that overtime is because they paid people of and have nobody to do the work. So the ones they keep on, they slowly kill of through overwork. And I do think that letter was the best one I have written the whole time I have been here. Don't work to hard. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
I hope your job is safe and you'll get another one easily, you're a clever man. Lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
Your could just email them, that means you wouldn't have to move and you've killed a few minutes of company time that you would have killed faffing about doing somehting else. And you could pretend to be some company spy that they don't know and get them all worried. Why should you be worried and them not just because they got an envelope? lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
I'm thinking about letting some mad person live in the attic, like in Jane Eyre, some one that bites people preferably. Oh wait, that'll be Morag then. lots of love
from heelandlass :
I'm promising too then. That's it... consider it done. Promise. xxx
from heelandlass :
Okay smoky. If you promise for next week, then I promise for next week too. That's a promise. I was going to do UK only but then I remembered some brilliant bands from Norway and wondered if that would count? Remember how MASSIVE America is compared to how teenywee we are....ah sack it, I'm going to include them!
from heelandlass :
Ah yes, I am hoping that come next Tuesday I will immediately feel enlightened and wise beyond my years. Just like you! Did you make my CD while you were off? I haven't done yours yet either. I am going to do it next week, I absolutely completely and utterly promise. xxx
from dooki :
HI JASON! I hadn't sent you a note in a while, so I thought I'd say hola! Doesn't this rain suck ass? Well, when you're indoors, it's great. However, when you walk to work like myself, it sucks ass....hmmm. I wonder, how does one suck an ass? You're the expert, do tell!
from heelandlass :
You're like my alter ego across the other side of the pond, in drinking stakes anyway. My weekend was so mental I think I've actually scared myself into behaving for a few weeks. Try that if you want a break. Scaring really seems to work! Love ya xx
from wherwhenwhy :
Are these dogs wearing anything Burberry, that always means trouble, especially the hats, biege tartan was never a good idea. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
Look on the bright side, you didn't have to do the interview tired and sleepy, and if you were that prepared for this one, you'll be red hot when you are awake for the next one. good luck. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
upper middle class don't work, they have people to work for them, that's how they are upper middle class i know some, the lucky bastards. Hope the job hunting goes well and you breeze through the interviews, remember, you're not there to win, you're just there for the fight, you are a warrior! Well that's what my homeopath said to me, but I decide the leave the armour and sword at home. lots of love
from heelandlass :
I think people sometimes delete you if you've not added them as a favourite. Which is really weird indeed. But I think some people are in it for the numbers. Quality over quantity I say. xxx
from wherwhenwhy :
What you want to do is buy a shed, put it somewhere nice, grow some veg out the back and just live in it. I've been eyeing up a few nice ones in B&Q, then you can chuck to job, make your own booze and do what you can in your drunken stupor. This is my plan B by the way, just thought I'd share it with you. lots of love
from dooki :
You got called a faggot? I love Texas. Maybe they meant it in that "metrosexual faggot" kind of way. If that's the case, kudos for your fashionista ways. Since that's probably not likely, I'll find the assholes and kill them. KILL THEEEMMMMM!!!
from wherwhenwhy :
I would have just put down the rider and sent the horse to a retirement home for injured horses where they give them artificial legs and sing them lullabyes. But then that is just me.
from wherwhenwhy :
I'm starting to think I should just get married, I'd get a mortgage and lots of presents and then get a divorce half the mortgage and then get my flat, I could do that in a year couldn't I?
from satellitebob :
or you could be like that guy phil collins played in that movie, maybe rob some trains. do trains still carry money? i really meant to marry rich... damnit.
from wherwhenwhy :
Who makes 100,000 a year, apart from bank robbers? And everyone is entitled to piss and moan, fever or not, and most people do it wihtout the fever so there is no problem there. My Dad had the sme problem, couldn't get a mortgage because he'd never been in debt. I think I might just rob a bank like in that film where they drilled in under the floor or something. There's an off-licence round the corner!
from wherwhenwhy :
Isn't turning up early for work more like undertime? Or is that just me splitting hairs? And don't snot on the keyboard because it isn't nice when others have to use it. On second thoughts, could be amusing. That is all I have to say because my brain is slowly dying. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
I got cleveland which just looked really shit so did something on suicide instead. lots of love
from mssassypants :
::peeks around the corner:: Hi Bob!
from kristintracy :
hello hello! long time and all that! sorry to hear about the breakup. breaking up is The Suck. but i just wanted to tell you that i totally bought and consumed Shiner Hefeweizen (sp?) last weekend and it was awesome! when i bought it i was like why does "shiner" sound so familiar like i've heard it before. i had my aha! moment yesterday while picking up my mail. satellite drinks the shiner! i don't know if you drink the hefe or if they have just plain vanilla shiner. made in shiner, tx. thas right.
from wherwhenwhy :
Walking in the rain is fun no matter what your age and I am seriously considering living in the car, it has a huge boot. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
One of my friends gave blood for the first time a few years ago, she was alright with the whole needle and blood in the bag thing, but passed out when they gave her tea and biscuits. They reckoned she ate it to fast, I think she just has an aversion to digestives. And least you didn't faint because of that.
from heelandlass :
you know, I really felt like I got a cuddle there. I liked it. Smoooch. xx
from heelandlass :
it's todger sb - not trodger. trodger would have to be something between a trojan and a penis. if there ever was such a thing. i am missing cuddles from you - come and give me a cuddle.
from onewetleg :
ah, there it is. thanks, sb.
from heelandlass :
I am amazed there is so much to learn about evil wasps! And okra too, although I am not sure I'm sure what okra is - is that ladies fingers? You lot call things by their wrong names - snowpeas, eggplant. What do you call courgettes? Anyway - wasps = bad. Caterpillers = good. In my book anyway, but then I've never been a keen gardener. Only a keen camper. Which I recommend doing if your up for being drunk outside around a fire. xxx
from raven9 :
Hello, you dont know me but I felt like leaving letters all over the place and I choose you to leave a letter to. Arn't we lucky now? yes I am strange.bye
from wherwhenwhy :
and godparents, my brothers godfather set fire to himself because he was wearing a bedsheet and chanting some weird stuff out of a book in a forest in candlelight, trying to convince these two students that him and my paretns were part of some weird scottish cult. Now that woud have been somehting to make a program about.
from wherwhenwhy :
My Dad has never managed to et himsefl on fire but he did gut the interior of my godmothers car with the welding torch, and he was perfectly sober at the time which makes it worse, and he had just put the new kitchen in so the hose pipe wouldn't fit onto the fancy new mixer taps, so he had to run upstairs with it attach it to the bathroom tap, throw the the hose out the window, run back down the stairs, out the back door, pick up the hose spewing water everywhere, run round the back of the house to the front and only just managed to get the hose to reach the car that was quietly burning away to itself. She got these nicely smokey looking windows that people pay fortunes for but she complained anyway. lots of love and I hope our Dad didn't get any permanent scarring.
from mikamw710 :
I came from McKinny TX. I lived there till I wa 10 then I moved 2 OK.
from heelandlass :
heh heh, you know you love it baby!
from wherwhenwhy :
I may fill the balloons with something a bit worse than soapy water if things don't change, and if I get arrested I get free bed and board and satellite tv. But she'll just smell. I think I might come out of it better in the long run. lots of love and watch out for those flashbacks
from heelandlass :
see SB, it's a foregone conclusion that sport is very very bad for you. you should stick to smoking, drinking and being very funny - you rule at all of those things. xxs
from wherwhenwhy :
Dabbing whiskey on the sore bit is supposed to stop it hurting when it comes to toothache, so my mother says, but you could always drink the stuff, it might be more succesfull. lots of love
from heelandlass :
I'm at work just now. You have no idea how delicious a beer and a smoke sounds right now. Mmmmmmmmm. We have some grass at home. I will have some as soon as I'm in!
from heelandlass :
Don't curse your drinking problem like that sb. You need to cherish your love of booze, let it grow inside of you, let it be part of you. It won't let you down in times of need, it will keep you warm when those around you don't care and most of all, with your love of booze as your best friend you will always have someone to come home to. Now go on, have a wee glass of red wine, one won't hurt. It won't break the bank one little glass of vino will it? Do it, do it for me. I'm having one for you tonight, so it's only fair! xxx
from wherwhenwhy :
Well that's a relief and in Scotland the don't play footy, they play fitba so you're better just sticking ih the soccer thing and then everyone will know what you're talking about. lots of love
from pattymelt :
do it! make a new survey! i don't know how people do it. i just can't think of anything interesting....
from wherwhenwhy :
You can have the job as long as you don't go fencing or anything else to do with mincing about with long pointy bits of metal, and don't make teabag mountains on the draining board that rot and go mouldy. Trial period of a month do?
from heelandlass :
exemellent. Yaey for gettin' it on! I love it. It rocks. It makes me feel fluffy. Is this the Morrisesy weekend? You are not allowed to go to see him without telling me what it was like. I dreamt about you last night adn I fell out of bed twice you can pin and mount me like a butterfly. etcetera.
from heelandlass :
That's more like it! My cat eats curry and drinks tea out of mugs. Hey - how's it going with the pharmacist?
from heelandlass :
you're cat doesn't eat chicken? sheesh, that's mental. I'm all kerfuffled now - no chicken. Whatever next!?
from mssassypants :
Yay for bob!
from heelandlass :
I am jealous of you going to see Morrissey. Last time I saw him was in 1995 and that kept me going for a good few years. The band that's supporting him over here are called The Ordinary Boys and they are rockin, I think you'd really like them. Fingers crossed they're supporting him in the US too.
from onewetleg :
oh, sb! thanks. i have had so many reasons to smile today that it really doesn't matter if i didn't get the stupid job. except the money part, it's just a fuggin relief. love,
from dooki :
I locked my diary. username: your username. Password: withcorn. Read on, and enjoy.
from dooki :
thanks for the note. You want to help me bust some knee caps?
from wherwhenwhy :
It has to be a little man, little woman don't sit in offices destroying masterplans, they just sit at home and watch Emmerdale. Mind you a cross dressing little man that'd be thing to sell tickets for. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
I have a theory about the whole. I think there is a satellitebob filter in certain postcode areas to censor you and your message to the world. That or there is this little man in an office somewhere deciding at what times of day who gets to read what, I just always get the satellitebob time untill the secret code was broken. Maybe at some point I'll hunt him down and stab him for you. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
Now I can actually download your diary without hunting for a computer that will accept it. All is good. My Grannie got hidiously drunk on her eightieth and we had to and we had to gt her home before she started stripping or something just as shocking. Hope you have fun. lots of love
from heelandlass :
oh yeah yourself satellitebob! I have a feeling you would've fitted right into our wee camping soiree. Shame you're in Dallas. Cheers for the 'waaay ooooh' on your profile page. Am now officially - chuffed!
from heelandlass :
I liked your satellitebob story it made me laugh and think about the time my friend and I stayed up for 48 hours taking pro plus to see what would happen. It ended with us throwing 48 frozen hamburgers off my mum's balcony and dealing with some serious stomach cramps, but it was a day I'll never forget! Coming back from holiday is really poo - at least you get to think about the next time you go away again though, keeps us going! See ya x
from over25revue :
ok, this is really from coldooze. i have to many fucking diaries, man. email me the password [email protected] and i will get cracking on it. also give me an idea on what kinda color you want. so exciting!!!1 so excitiing! love,
from heelandlass :
Don't forget to tell me your satellite bob story, satellite bob - I will hold my breath till you get back from your hols. Could be a bit red in the face - I'm sure it will be worth it!
from heelandlass :
This is going to sound like I'm a crazy stalker, but I read your answers to a survey done by Halee and for the question 'what is your favourite joke?' you said the same joke as me. I thought that was a bit mad. That is the best joke in the world. Other ones I like along those lines are what do you call a pig with 2 eyes? - piig, what do you call a dear with no eyes? no eye dear and what do you call a dear with no eyes and no legs? still no eye dear. ha ha.
from over25revue :
i hope the next time you read it you will love it as much. have a drink in my name in boston. my name is jj. just one time say, 'this one is for jj.'
from over25revue :
hey, hotstuff, your review is up. cha, cha, cha!
from miss-k2 :
Thanks Mr.Satelliebob. Hope you don't go to hell for the God remark but if you do "go to hell", you got a beer coming...that's right you lucky dog, I'll be buying you a beer in hell.
from dooki :
Thanks, bob. (You're always on my side.) I might have to check out Pleasant Grove. They're pretty good, (though I've never heard them live.) (parenthesis) I'm sorry your head is hurting...(hangover??) [()()()()] {stuff can go here too}
from kristintracy :
you're on myspace? i am also. myspace rules. it is the hella hella ghetto friendster. i dunno how you invite people, so invite me, okay?? i think my deal is kristintracy, but i'm not positive. anyhow. invite me to be your friend, kay?! kay.
from onewetleg :
hey, sb, where you been? i opened a review site: http://over25revue.diaryland.com copy and paste that mother into your browser thingy and then request! you won't regret. love,
from kristintracy :
AHAHAHAHA. Oprah, dammit. I'd like to kick her in her "O", and I didn't even see it.
from dooki :
I think the pixies are touring by themselves first. I know they're doing the Sacramento show (I can never remember the name of that) in June, but not lallapalooza. I've been trying to kidnap my brother for years. maybe you can help.
from dooki :
Man, dallas pawn shops are for shit. I pawned a guitar of mine that was worth 3,000 dollars, and they gave me 95. To top it off, the day my first payment was due to get it out of pawn, they sold my guitar. Fucking ass holes. By the way, Pixies tickets go on sale today (wed). they already sold out two texas shows, so if you're interested, get on it, bro! They come in October. I'm excited for those able to afford tickets. i can't so I cry alone.
from mssassypants :
What is with the recent grammar and spell checks? I miss your stream of consciousness writing style. There. I just rated your diary. :P Love Sassypants
from onewetleg :
come to diaryland chat. you don't have to download anything and i made a room just for us. it's called looking for satellitebob. hehe.
from kristintracy :
hahaha. that rules. i have quoted and linkied you today. <3
from kristintracy :
"someone stab me with something that would allow me to not be here." BEST. QUOTE. EVER.
from kristintracy :
i had no idea i hadn't written about the whole czech please thing before on my diary. at least i don't think i have based on the search my diary engine on d.land. i am posting about that tomorrow. although the porn itself didn't involve czech girls (to my knowledge, i never actually saw it), you might want to check (totally unintentional) out west, tx.
from kristintracy :
I stand by "Czech Please" being one of the best porn titles of all time. However, since "Coitus In the Anal Hole" would be in a totally different section of the video store, i.e. the Buttsex area, I accept your nomination.
from miss-k2 :
You turned down a FREE blowjob? Are you sure you're a guy?
from pornoviolent :
yeah
from pornoviolent :
i thought...?
from kristintracy :
I mean seriously? If I went up to the guy in the cube next to mine and said "I'm chilly, will you snuggle with me?" He would probably mess his pants.
from kristintracy :
Thanks for the well wishes and the clicking. Much appreciated. You know what would be nice right about now? For it not to be like Frozen Tundra degrees in my office. Or maybe just to be at home instead of the office. Yeah. That would be good.
from pornoviolent :
huh
from kristintracy :
XTC was the name of an adult superstore chain in florida. ah, XTC.
from wherwhenwhy :
You know you can get tablets or that. Uncontrollable limb usage. Or maybe you just have to invent a little corner that goes over the escape key and you'd make a fortune, make one out of balsa wood and a bit of blutac and you're sorted. Sell it to people with pinky problems. Start a support group. lots of love
from wherwhenwhy :
I'm having a problem downloading your page, all that has been happening is the twirly cursor thing keeps twirling and then slowly has a heart attack. But I'm a bit worried about the kicking a poodle thing I just noticed, but that isn't what I was going to say. What I am wondering is how come the escape key keeps getting hit when it isn't near any other key or is it different in other countries? This has been bothering me for some time seeing that everybody seems to do it and get upset, I just delete the thing because the computer crashes, after the twirly cursor thing twirls its last twirl so to speak. I'm stopping here because now I'm rambling. lots of love
from mssassypants :
love you bob
from mssassypants :
Bob, you fuckin kill me. kick a poodle for me too, better yet, go read my entry, it has lesbians in it.
from kristintracy :
My father actually had one of those shirts. Unfortunately, he wore it out. Bummer.
from wtf-reviews :
Hey! I'm just hear to promote our new review site. If you'd like a review just request! Thanks! :-)
from mssassypants :
GOd I missed your diseases insight.
from dooki :
I refuse to cut and paste. That is rediculous. Don't you know that I have a remote to find my remote? I also have arm extensions for those hard to reach places like, my face. Cut and paste? Are you kidding? in fact, I hired someone just to write you this note. You think I'd have the energy to do that? jeez, man.
from kristintracy :
Oh boy. It is currently 3:eleventeen, and that means about 15something minutes until I get to leave. And about 30ishsomething minutes until I have a drink in hand. Friday = <3
from mssassypants :
Marry me Bob. Sassy.
from theperson :
speaking of your jacked up knuckles, the janitor at the store i use to work at was telling me how he used to soak his hands in salt water, then beat on a wooden board with them. he showed me his fists and said, "these can hurt somebody."
from kristintracy :
HAHHAHAH (your entry re: Pat Robertson, etc.). Guess what? Ugh. I am up at 8:45! Good lordy! Guess why! I don't know! Well, that's a lie. I do know. I slept on my brother's couch! Couch sleeping does not = sleepin' late or comfy. Even if you were up until 4am. SUX!
from dooki :
I just might kick someone in the balls. What about using a stun gun on the balls? OH YEAH, are you going to guided by voices tonight? Or are you going to Modest Mouse next month, or Sonic Youth? HUH, HUH?!?!?!?
from kristintracy :
WHOA. I KNOW. those pictures every day.
from onewetleg :
yes, and i am taking off my bra right now. what a coincidence. love,
from dooki :
well, it sure shootin' has me on there now, HOOOWEEEE! Get ready! i'm goin' ta read yer diary like it's goin' out a style! SHEEEIT, doggies!
from dooki :
I join your notify list, and no one notifies me. What gives, man? I've done the tylenol pm thing too. I overslept today as well, i think it's all the grey clouds. Or maybe the drugs. I don't know.
from kristintracy :
Showers ARE for the weak. Color me strong yesterday, but today I was all a pussy. During the weekends, I am fucking stone cold.
from miss-k2 :
Happy birthday. I owe you a spanking and I'm not known to be gentle.
from mssassypants :
LOL!! Kicked in the "sparklies"! Oh Bob! You kill me! Love Sassy
from kristintracy :
HAHAH. Fucking ballerinas. I think they are looking for a tutu orgy. A gang bang with pointe shoes.
from kristintracy :
See. Guess who I am going to punch in the neck? My comments section. AND signmyguestbook.com That site! Ugh. With the "oops! you can't sign again this soon!" business. me: "um. i haven't signed at all today." Whatever. My point being that yes. I am down for the makeout party. Plan for getting to Dallas: drink a lot of Starbucks and run very fast.
from rokazu :
It's always just a bitch when the gremlins eat your damn entry.
from kittyleopard :
Ok, so now you're pulling my leg...thats just too much.
from onewetleg :
have you used the notifylist yet? try sending one and see if i get it. love,
from kittyleopard :
You go outside in your socks, eh? You're my new best friend. Feel the love homie, its like brie cheese. Or, um. Something.
from kristintracy :
HAHA. Asian people just crack me up. "Here, what let's do is get this gelatinous sea creature, and steam it in its own entrails and serve it with dried rice chips." Um...
from kittyleopard :
Cool Diary.
from dooki :
Did you make a traditional sludge snowman yesterday? I didn't either. Fuck the one inches...fuck 'em.
from rokazu :
I am glad I did something. I did fuck up though. I think I did it for the wrong reason.
from onewetleg :
am i dreaming or did i used to be on your notifylist? if you never had a notifylist. then you should get one. and if you have one you should update it. remember. i might just be dreaming. keep that in mind. love,
from rokazu :
I need a bearcat, and a drink. I suppose I'll have to go to Dallas soon.
from dooki :
I know it doesn't mean a damn thing to you, but I went through something similar. He finally fucked off. Does that give you hope? He fucked up, he acted like a child, he risked our 12 year friendship, and he left. I moved on, I got drunk, I grew up, all is better. I'm sorry for that bullshit.
from dooki :
I'll let you know when, though I don't think any note or flyer will be necessary...you'll feel the rock days before, cold and unadulterated RAWK will be your fuel, driving you ever closer to the crappy venue I might play at. The closer you get, the more your ears will bleed. The longer you stay, you'll grow wings on your cock and fly to my undulating boss vagina...wishing and hoping to make sweet guitar babies...but you won't because you'll explode with the rock.
from rokazu :
One of my best friends back in the day wasn't diagnosed bi-polar until he became Mormon and was deciding to become a missionary in South America at about 21. The medication does help him alot.
from dooki :
Hey, thanks for the CBS link. I sent it to all my contacts. What a fucked up ad! By the way, you're right, banged up knuckles are the shizzle for picking up chicks. Even if you got them doin' some plumming...they'll think you're handy.
from miss-k2 :
I can see that you're dripping with pretty young women. You dawg.
from onewetleg :
nice link. i love the disclaimer. i used ot have a prison pen-pal. i wrote him all kinds of dirty, nasty letters. i figured, wtf, he was in for life for murdering someone. then one day he just stopped writing to me. bummer.
from dooki :
You know, I happen to be very close to a certain, "organization" that could help you with that hand job. You don't happen to be homeless, are you? That is one of the stipulations, as you may already know.
from onewetleg :
i wonder how many people do that. it's a good way to keep track of where you are getting your spam from. by the way, i still think you are incredibly sexy and want to rub you. love,
from kristintracy :
AHA! Now I get it. Any doubts I had as to whether or not work sucks have been eradicated.
from kristintracy :
HAHAHAHHAHAHA. what are your fingers doing WAAAAAAAAAAAAY UP THERE on your keyboard? or maybe yours is different than mine.
from kristintracy :
"i plumbed." BRILLIANT. i'm back from england now. stateside. i <3 london, but $10 for cigarettes is not fun. EX. PENSE. IVE. still, though, FUN TIMES.
from dooki :
this bitch is keepin' it real, yo! I watched that bullshit last night too. What a dumb ass. I love all the democrats sitting quietly, not applauding at all, except for the extra funding put into community colleges. Since that's a democrat's standing...otherwise, they sat there smugly. I loved it. Oh yeah, you might get a whoopin' if you say "cowboy" talk one more time. Don't we Texans already have enough stereotypes? GAH!
from onewetleg :
my kinda whore, you are. love,
from dooki :
I forking hate bowl cuts. HATE!!!!!! These are the kids that I associate with popcycles. I don't know why, but I think of a white polo tee and navy blue shorts, with red popcycle juice running down their arms. And then they want to touch you with their sticky fingers. I hate when they turn around real fast, making the hair flip all perfect and shit. HATE! i so know what you mean, dude. By the way, thanks for the butt link. I loved that site.
from kristintracy :
We're staying in a hotel, actually. So, no dice on making the food @ the hotel. Eesh. I am so fucking crazy with the money neurosis. I will be a maniac the whole time. I can feel it. But, I think I could do New York on $40/day, and I think that is about equivalent to London. I'm hoping. AAHHAHAHAH. God.
from kristintracy :
Okay. I have 40 English Pounds on me right now. How far will that get me? I mean. Are drinks hella expensive? Right now it's 1.95 dollars / 1 pound (!). God. I'm gonna have to slum it aren't I!!!! I know you were there recently. Do you think I can get by on like 20 pounds a day???
from onewetleg :
the bowl cut. it didn't look good on moe and it don't look good on anybody else. well, maybe it was fun for ten minutes in the 80's, BUT THAT'S IT!!! you know what i hate worse? the hipsters with the dyed black hair underneath and the bleached blonde hair on the top. ghhh. and green eyshadow. why is that back? why? whyyyyyy????
from onewetleg :
what are japanese schpots? can i have some? love,
from kristintracy :
How jealous am I that you got to PET A SLOTH?????????????????????? There is one at the aquarium in Baltimore, but, unfortunately, I have never actually seen it. "See the damn sloth for god's sake" is on my lifegoal/todo list for sure.
from wherwhenwhy :
aaah. it all makes sense now. my brain can function again. thanks
from wherwhenwhy :
Sorry I am a bit slow so I have to ask, Nice what? me don't understandy
from onewetleg :
hi, sweetie. hope you feel better. i have been missing you. when are you going to get yahoo messenger? love,
from kristintracy :
HAHAHAH. Babydamn. Yeah. I was talking to my friends on Saturday, about how we look in pictures. I mean, the general vibe we give off individually in a typical candid shot. I said "I always look like I'm going to eat you or fuck you." My profile photo is no exception.
from kristintracy :
Hey-ya. Both you and my brother wrote about broccoli today. WEIRD!
from dooki :
80 today! 32 tommorrow! That's TEXAS! weeeeeeeeeeeee.
from mssassypants :
Lovin the spankin 'do, yo. Nice pics! Love SassyPants
from dooki :
AHHHH...the infamous town of Denton. Don't we all have a friend who lives there or goes to school there, or parties there? Is Denton the alpha and omega of all things? Did we miss something essential here?
from onewetleg :
happy new scar. love,
from rokazu :
All that and then Dirty Rob's car is fucked? Shit.
from kristintracy :
If this is indeed true, and the video commentary is not on the DVDs/videos that Time Life (?? I think.) is advertising, then that is a complete and total sham. I wonder if it has something to do the DVDs being put out by Mike Judge, without the cooperation or whatever of MTV? Either way, that is just wrong.
from kristintracy :
So, Mike Judge. Funny thing is, I saw an ad for the Beavis and Butthead DVD set yesterday. And, this morning, I had been thinking about my favorite reactions to videos: silence from both of them, imitation of deathmetal "singers", and them saying YES over and over. I should probably buy the DVDs.
from dooki :
to take my quiz, go here:http://www.coolquiz.com/myquiz/myquiz.asp?quiznum=1293858062 by the way, it's a little retarded, but I thought it was fun.
from b-w-p :
Thanks for taking the violence survey, and have a great new year! b-w-p
from kristintracy :
Why you no put za links, so I am can slack and take za kvizes too?
from dooki :
I did an online quiz too. But no one fucking did it...damn losers! Fuckin' shit up! And I'm mad at onewetleg. She gave praise to britanya and some other chick for doing her surveys, and I happen to know that you and I are the king and queen of onewetleg's surveys...what a whore! ha ha ha ha. Oh yeah, and if you hit the back button, stuff goes away.
from kristintracy :
I'm "Apocalypse Now": "a rogue wanderer on the winding river of life, searching after your shadow self." uh oh.
from boardho :
You need to change the http://members.diaryland.com/edit/changeoldertemplate.phtml --- older template.
from boardho :
That's the way Diaryland does it. If you go to Gold then it will update all previous entries with the current template otherwise if you want your picture links to work you have to edit each entry.
from onewetleg :
not really sure what you are asking for here. you can take the page and put it in any archive you want, i suppose. do you want a link on the page for it? really, what is it you want?
from onewetleg :
i'm starting to worry about xmas tomorrow. what if... what if they forget cranberry sauce? i don't even like cranberry sauce but if it's not on the table i may have a panic attack. i have to drink southern comfort just to get southern and comfortable with it. do you have a hard time changing your unky moods thingy? it takes about 5 minutes for me to load the page. how do you feel about that, jason? ooh, this neighborhood feels weird today. im staying inside. love,
from kristintracy :
HAHAHHAAH. For you, I think it is all about the lesbian twins in tutus. I'm workin' on it....
from kristintracy :
O. M. G. are you kidding me???? Seriously, we have a mission, and it is ballerina sluts on the www. Let's get crackin here. I know people.
from kristintracy :
HAHHAHAHHA! YES YES YES! Ballerina whores every day!
from mssassypants :
I lurve you Bob-o hang in there. Better yet...Come to Sassyland! We're all drooling nutters.
from onewetleg :
ooh, deep rooted sexual perversions revealed! with our special guest, satellitebob! i wanna see roseanne. i don't think we get that show here. just reruns of her sitcom. lucky you. don't you have aim? this is a pain. love,
from onewetleg :
i remember gh. 'the summer of love' what, 79? 80? when luke and laura ran away. remember the episode where they were doing their laundry and had nothing else to wear so they both sat around the laundromat wearing towels? hubba-hubba!
from onewetleg :
cool. i'm watching reruns of three's company. janet and crissy are talking about their boobs. janet is wearing a really hot striped shirt. and i think jack bleached his hair for this season.
from onewetleg :
oh, yeah, so hot! this is like we are doing cyber where everyone can see it. what is your mannikin wearing?
from onewetleg :
you have a thing for mannikins too? i prefer the womannikins, really. i talk dirty to them while i am dressing and undressing them. they like it. they told me they do. when my store closes i will try to steal one. i know which one. i'll name her betty. she has no head.
from kristintracy :
HAHAHHAH! I hate today so much so bad like I hate babies! We are united in anger. Let's throw things. On the count of one: 3-2-*SLAM*
from kristintracy :
that is the most awesome thing i have seen in a really long time.
from onewetleg :
i am still up. i never sleep unless i have to. sleep is for losers who don't have computers or books or tv. and people who care about their future. having no future, i try to live every moment in someone elses version of reality. enjoy,
from jensquee :
hey you
from onewetleg :
searching yourself is fun. i haven't done it in a while. i think ill do it now. love,
from onewetleg :
i love that movie. when they attack the hippie that is screwing his girlfriend. 'now get your patchouli STINK out of my store!' perfect!
from mssassypants :
The Itchy Yum Yums...Hmmm. Nice. Love the Bob...Ms.Sassypants
from dooki :
I know this place is retarded, but if you want cheap beer, go to Dirty Dave's. It's fucking 75 CENT draughts! What the hell? WHy isn't this place cooler?
from kristintracy :
hey, tiger. too late on the card. it got all wet and i had to throw it away.
from dooki :
you should check out the Meridian Room on Main and Exposition. It's a really cool bar with local artists' work and good music. Every first monday of the month they feature a band and sell CDs for pretty cheap. I think they do it with Good Records or something. Anyway, I got the Hail to the Thief Radiohead album that way, a week before it was released. PRETTY COOL! And they have great German beers on tap. Good food too. I like Meridian Room.
from onewetleg :
when you ramble on like that it makes my pants all sticky. eeeewwww! i have to go change now.
from cruel-irony :
You know King Ludwig was in love with his cousin and loved it when Wagner sang his operas to him, right? Of course, he was fond of the opium too.
from onewetleg :
hi, nice to hear from you again. i thought you fell down dead or sumthin. love,
from dooki :
Well, I used to go to the billiard bar, but then all these white hats and hemp necklaces took over, and I began to ooze blood from my pores and had to quit going. If you go on a tuesday, it ain't bad. I prefer the cavern to any other bar on Lower Greenville, but that's just me and my music snob friends, so there you go.
from onewetleg :
you are so lucky you got sunday-monday off! i would kill for sunday-monday off. man, working on sundays and mondays sucks. having friday as my monday is a bitch because everyone says 'enjoy the weekend!' and i just keep thinking i will if you don't come in to shop! but i just say 'you too' and smile. then when they are gone i make a little paper voodoo doll of them and burn it. then boss lady says 'what's burning?' but i just change the subject because she is easier to distract than a chicken. or maybe i mean some other dumb farm animal. whatever. love,
from dooki :
you suck. I just thought you might like to know. And I don't mean it in the literal sense, but more in a catchy kitschy indie rock kind of way. By the way, charlie brown rocks. I had a charlie brown christmas tree once and I would sing really loud in front of it with my head tilted way back and I'd shuffle my feet too. Then again, I'm 1/4 downs syndrome so it wasn't a big shock. Did I mention that you suck? Because if I didn't, I'm saying it now.
from onewetleg :
you can even tell them you did it with me, i won't mind.
from kristintracy :
You're in the teevee industry, so tell me this: how come they don't show the Peanuts holiday specials any more? It's really a sad sad thing.
from mssassypants :
I'm glad you are ok! :)
from onewetleg :
oh, i'm sorry. when i said i wouldn't try anything i meant like building super robots. there will be underwear touching, mr red card. hooligan!
from onewetleg :
good, jesus got his holidays jacked. he, well, they, jacked em in the first place. take back the holidays! pagans unite! whoo. oh, headrush. can we just lay down here? i promise i won't try anything. zzzzzzzzz
from nymphosquest :
Well, who doesn't think of 10" cock while masturbating?
from rokazu :
I think your right, maybe I was trying to get rid of her.
from dooki :
I KNOOOOOWWWWW YYOOOOOUUUUUUU!!!!! Well, I don't know you, but I've seen you before. It is Dallas, you know. DALLAS.
from dooki :
Guess what? It's going to get even warmer. That's right, it's christmas time in Texas. Beautiful 82 degrees and rising. By the way, why do all these chicks think you're hot? I mean, I guess your typing is good looking, but is there like a picture of you somewhere that I'm missing? Until I see it, you're an ugly whore who shaves too much.
from onewetleg :
i hate to pop your bubble, but i do snap the heads of the customers. then i call them furbies and pretend they talk to me. i have 19 now. love,
from nymphosquest :
I did what Onewetleg did. I masturbated between entries. You are one sexy bitch Bob.
from dooki :
So, babydaddy in town, eh? And you're stuck with cats. At least you got some pussy running around in your house again. HA. That was a horrible joke. it's fucking 78 degrees today. What the hell? I hates Texas.
from onewetleg :
mind the dumbassness. that's what i do for a living. love,
from nymphosquest :
Emu...Hmmm...Those are like big chickens right? Cant you ride them?
from onewetleg :
i took your advice and masturbated between each entry. except the last one when i went and spayed my neighbors pet except i found out she doesn't have a pet so i think i neutered her. i'm not sure. sounds like a groovy weekend. have you seen dreamcatcher. it's really cohesive to the book. is cohesive the right word? well, it gets the job done. act as if. p.s. you are really hot. i wanna rub up and down on you.
from cruel-irony :
Thank you for the kind words.
from mssassypants :
::lick lick:: MMMMM. Tequila.
from kristintracy :
I almost knocked over my temporary, raggedy cube wall this morning, while trying to put up my new world map (gift from my public radio station for donating). This is a perfect metaphor for my life.
from mssassypants :
"I am not just saying that so you can get in my pants, no siree, I am saying that becasue I am a little empty on the inside due to my overindulging and I just want to cuddle, but yeah, I'll probably feel you up, then we wil fuck, but that doesn't change the fact that I love you, for fucking me." (my weekends summed up in a nutshell)
from boardho :
I love you for fucking me.. That's so sweet.
from kristintracy :
Your guestbook was taking hella long, so here I go notes-style. OMG. Do you realize the amount of trouble we would get into if we were within 100 miles of one another???? DO YOU??? It would be a tsunami of rockstar proportions. Jesus Christ.
from mssassypants :
SHAME ON YOU!!! Laughing that Dr. Romano got squarshed...Ok, it was funny. Gimpy little bastard that he is...But it was a really good episode. Im a wiener...
from dooki :
congrats on the 3% raise. If you want, you guys can watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion show. It comes on tonight on CBS. Aren't you TEMPTED? mmmmmm....half naked anorexic girls!
from onewetleg :
congradumulations
from kristintracy :
YES YES! Totally you should hitch a ride with me to London! Beer! British accents! LESSGO!
from livingaploy :
awww..you went to yeah yeah yeahs...*jealous*..did you go to Trail of Dead...AND going to Badly Drawn Boy?
from onewetleg :
i didn't think gothika would be very good. i'll wait for the dvd, thank you. as for the y3's, i bought the cd with the pink bunny on it and liked it but the next one not so good. thinking naughty thoughts about you again. when i see your name in red i go 'mmmm, satellitebob. yeah!' love,
from onewetleg :
you know, i was just reading your notes and only chicks write to you. you are some kind of chick magnet or something. your super-hero name could be chick-magneto. love,
from mssassypants :
Ya know, I always wondered how teevee worked...Now I won't be so pissed if something goes wrong. I know it is just human error. But god help anyone who fucks with my SIMPSONS....:;shakes fist menacingly::
from kristintracy :
HAHHAHAHHAHA. Ugly green pants EVERY DAY AND NIGHT!
from kristintracy :
YES. Green totally. Aren't your ugly pants green??? I just realized that.
from dooki :
the online quiz is located in my older entries, and the entry is titled "quiz". Go to the website on that entry.
from onewetleg :
hookers and burgers and demons, oh, my!
from dooki :
sorry your monday sucked so bad. at least you quizzed yourself on hell, and other such nonsense. I hate dept meetings. I had the worst fucking office space job in the world. i got out of there. with a dick in my hand and a xerox copied pic of my boss' ass in the other. god bless 'em.
from kristintracy :
OMG. ballet. i forgot that you have a BALLERINA FETISH. super. i will dig out more pictures for you. fun times.
from onewetleg :
hi sb. i was just in the neighborhood and thought i'd stop by. have fun, jj
from rokazu :
I'm only in the second level of Hell. I gotta get out more.
from kristintracy :
yeah, so guess what? we are totally gonna be neighbors in hell! level 6 represent!
from mssassypants :
Rug burn is only good on the knees... >;)
from kristintracy :
HAHAHHAHAHA! so good. soso good. so you were in virginia that is totally near me! wow. and you went to london??? if you have any tips & pointers, hook it up because i am going in january (in case you didn't know haha i've only mentioned it 745 times).
from mssassypants :
Strung out sucks ass. I like purple haired freaks too. Lemme know if you need a copy of Eddie, I can get you a VHS copy if you like. Love Ms. Sassypants.
from kristintracy :
Your entry today was seriously one of the funniest things I've ever read. <3 Kristin
from dooki :
hey! i work right by ROSS AVE! What a coincidence! I too am a fan of Ross. You can buy a Mother Mary Dildo, a cowboy hat, and pick up some tres leches while yer at it! All the while, eyeing the poor down and wishing you had a clean t-shirt. What??
from dooki :
You are not the stupid, you are the hungover. You should drink some tomato juice and take an asprin. I don't know why, but it works. How'd you get a corny with a penis, and not a corny with a dog?
from onewetleg :
oh, god, you make me happy. love, jj
from kristintracy :
Our relationship IS special, it's true. Boy/girl. Cowboy/Indian. Boss/rad, etc. Okay, we can still go out. WOOO!
from kristintracy :
OMG. soso wrong for hearting the cowboys. i might have to break up with you.
from onewetleg :
is there a way to moonwalk forwards? love, jj
from mssassypants :
Ohhhh. Kewl! you will love it! I swear. Which one was he gonna burn for you?
from onewetleg :
no, thank you for being such a hottie! :) love, jj
from rokazu :
May the Golf rock long and frequently, for you have earned it my son.
from kristintracy :
i know, right MY HANDS HOLY CRAP!!! scary.
from kristintracy :
"I just ate my Zyrtec, drank a can of the Dr Pepper and ate some ding dongs. Speed here I come." that made me laugh soso hard. I was crying. HAHAHHHA. i just read it again.
from kristintracy :
STONER SMURF? holy crap! FREE CHEECH, ETC.!
from onewetleg :
you are the juiciest fruit on the gumtree. i wanna chew you up! love, jj
from mssassypants :
http://www.eddieizzard.com/downloads/video.izz Lucky for you boy-o I gotcha hook up. Go here and you can watch some clips of the Eddster in action. Lemme know whatcha think.
from kristintracy :
so, i read your answers to my survey & your answers to your own, and all i have to say is "GOIN' TO THE CHAPEL, AND THEY'RE...."
from kristintracy :
When I click on the link, it brings up the survey, with blank fields to fill out. There don't seem to be others' answers, etc. *off to take the survey* I have one also. So. You know. Take it.
from rokazu :
So yeah, this past weekend inspired me to finally get off my ass and vent on the web. We'll see what happens. BTW, this is the big bald guy that wears girl's shirts to karaoke bars!
from mssassypants :
<img src="http://members.tripod.com/waronpot/101825a0.gif"> This is for your site. Smoke up Homeo!
from mssassypants :
Wheeee! Stoned is goood. I will partake after work. So only 2 more hours! Looks like you were having fun in the pics. What a studmuffin. :)
from kristintracy :
Note to you: SO CUTE, i <3 the glasses, want to put you in my pocket, etc.! I didn't rip any clothes this past weekend. I was too busy sleeping, apparently. (7pm sat.- 3am sun, then back to bed until noon, then to sleep at 10pm sunday night. WHATTUP, RIP VAN WINKLE?!!) Note to Cousin Daniel: Please send me your Ghostbusters T-shirt. Hugs! Kristin
from dooki :
man, I'm sorry to hear about the dumb bitches. I'm a bitch, but I'm not dumb. well, I mean, I don't know how to prove cold fusion or anything, but that doesn't make me dumb, right? i hope she does go to Virginia, and out of your life. She seems to cause more problems than solutions. As for your Uncle, what a bad ass. Hopefully he won't choose Chemo. It's so painful, and the quality of life deminishes. If it's for him, more power to him. I've been through some serious cancer bouts myself, with family and the like. Good luck to him. and to you. what's up with your last entry by the way? are you on the crack? are you on the pot?
from onewetleg :
best of wishes for uncle mofo. and thank you for thinking of a song and not feeling compelled to write out the lyrics in your diary. love, jj
from kristintracy :
Uncle Pinky is my favorite EVERY DAY. He gets all the ballerina love 8 days a week. ~kristin
from onewetleg :
i dont think the closed garage door thing works anymore, since all the gas is unleaded. all you get is a really bad hangover. i think heroin and whores would be the way to go.
from kristintracy :
I am also, funnily enough, Vice President of the Titty Squad. Between my friends and I, the positions of: President, VP (ME!), Secretary, Treasurer, Human Resources, and Comptroller are filled. I'm thinking maybe you could be the Secretary of Defense?
from kristintracy :
In case you have been wondering who the princess of the you-can-totally-see-her-bra-through-every-shirt-she-wears-this-week club of bad dressers, it's me. I left my tiara at home.
from healingscabs :
that is one of THE funniest things I have ever seen
from boardho :
oh man, that costume is bad.
from onewetleg :
one other thing. i got four hits with you as a referer. thanks for the publicity. love, jj
from onewetleg :
simply gorgeous! i commend you on your good taste and timeliness. bravo! jj
from onewetleg :
well, here is san francisco they say sushi just like mom used to make. i swear they do. love, jj
from mssassypants :
Do you like Eddie Izzard?
from kristintracy :
Hm. This is not your email, as the link would have me believe. Glad you enjoyed the drawings. I'm going to a meeting now. I just had a 4-shot iced espresso drink. Let's see how this plays out...
from dooki :
perhaps, while you're dreaming about it, you can dream about the kittens and the kiddieporn doctor, and how the naked chick might have allergies to the toadstool...and also, imagine the naked chick to be about fifteen. That's actually old she looks in the painting. KIDDIE PORN ALL AROUND! WEEEEEE! by the way, what does your webcounter do?
from dooki :
Hey, maybe you could work out a trade. do you have any cinderblock entertainment systems? Or maybe you have an old toothbrush holder lodged in the cobwebs of your cabinets. I bet she'd sell it for only $75, but just cuz I know ya.
from dooki :
ok, so I hate fucking Texas OU weekend. I work on greenville, and I almost shot people in the face. Were you in town? If you were, you have to know what I'm talking about.
from cruel-irony :
Hey there, I tried to email you but it bounced. It's in regards to my trip to Texas. You can email me at [email protected] Or click on that email button on my page.
from onewetleg :
hey, mister! i like what yuh done did with yore diary, what with the diaryrings at the bottom and all. it's real nice. but now yuh ain't got no contacts but the dinged e-mails. put some ding-dong notes links in dere! oh, and tell yer ma and pa i says 'howdy!' if'n yuh need any help ah'm here for yuh. cheers, jj
from onewetleg :
oh, you already did. sorry. ignore last message. and then ignore this message. in fact delete them both so i dont look like such an asshole. im just making this worse arent i. god, what should i do. i should shut up! i need a cigarette. bye
from onewetleg :
oh, you are approved all right. thanks for joining the ring. now join cantgetread. is this getting annoying yet?
from onewetleg :
templates from andrew are perfectly all right. in fact, more than welcome. so join up, damnit!
from onewetleg :
thank you for adding me to your favorites. i would like to invite you to join my diaryrings. the fucktemplate ring and the cantgetread ring. if you are interested and need any help, feel free to ask. love, jj (high-fives all around.)
from onewetleg :
go to edit your profile. then click on the link in the first paragraph. it says some thingl like click here to change your blah, blah and the people who show up in your buddy list i think. its the first link on the page. then you'll be taken to a form where you can change your little blurb and add buddies. be sure to click the done button at the very bottom. good luck.
from scaredpretty :
LOL, LOL, LOL...u mean you don't love when people put that towards you??? well damn, you must be crazy....
from onewetleg :
i think the only correct place to use lol is in an instant message. one of my co-workers said lol out loud. 'well, im going to lunch now, lol' those werent the words in the actual sentence because i forgot what ever she said. all i can remember was the lol at the end. rather than laughing out loud, she chose to say 'lol.' i think i might look for a new job.
from cruel-irony :
I hate that "LOL" crap too. If you write something that is funny, you shouldn't need to point it out. Unfortunately, it's way overused too.
from mssassypants :
I have also been on both ends of the spectrum and I think they both suck. I did find myself being snippier to him that day. Thats weird. He cant control my dreams. Things are odd today. Im sorry to hear about your uncle pinky.
from cruel-irony :
Great entry - I love it! Especially the soap opera spin.
from cruel-irony :
YOU got held up at a party full of hotties?! Why is that not hard to believe at all?
from dooki :
hey, there us rain and there is more of it on the way and the rain and the way and the more hang out on wednesdays, which I think is rude because i asked more last week if he wanted to hang out with me on wednesdays, but I guess he's busy with way and rain. I am going now, because you don't like me no more. I'm like a pimple on yer ass and a troll doll. WHY GOD?
from dooki :
One time I knew this boy named bob, but he ate a lot of hampster vomit, and you don't seem like you would eat the hampster vomit...but do you ever go to the Cavern or Billiard Bar and think to yourself, "my, I have never seen more tube tops in my life. I might vomit up hampsters?" Because I do. You are funny. Play with me. I am the funny too, so much the funny. I am girl who is funny. Yes sir. I is.
from livingaploy :
ferris bueller..you're my hero.
from sarika :
I love your diary. I love your honesty. And i especially love your apathy thing.... x
from cruel-irony :
London's a great place... I hope you're enjoying it!
from cruel-irony :
HAHAHAHAHA. That just kind of sums up everything nicely. Life is funny that way.
from cruel-irony :
Happy Birthday! Enjoy...
from jnickole :
hahah i like your diary. You need a guestbook, so I can sign it. :)
from cruel-irony :
I'm all about the layout when it comes to grocery shopping. And, you're right, refried beans should be next to the taco stuff.
from greenstar7 :
hello i found your site and yeah its funny. late, cam

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update April 6, 2020: Sorry, we just had 8+ hours downtime due to a server problem. Restoring from backups took soooo long, but everything is back and no data was lost. Ay yay yay! Anyhow, hope everyone is well with the virus stuff.

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