05.08.2003 - 10:07 p.m.
My diary Looked lonely so I decided to write something to keep it company.
I find that fresh insight moves gently these days. Like music drifting from a party on a star filled night.
To be honest I feel torn these days.
Caught between what my mother wants me to be.
What my father wants me to be.
And what I want.
The person that I am is woven from my parents and all those who have contributed to my life and they are great in number.
For me it is the struggle to stand on my own two feet more than just a metaphor.
I guss the thing that bothers me the most is that I am the problem. and... I am the solution.
I have often wanted to shrink from who I am. Unable to accept that I have lived through the experiences of my life.
I feel sometimes like how the fuck did I live through that. I feel ravaged by life.
I used to play this game with God I bet you can't top this. Funny thing was he was always able to top my experiences.
Until I was tired of playing that game, actually he played so well that I didn't know what to do. He tagged me. I was it and I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to tag God back.
I still say that God uses crayons to draw my life. What a box of Crayons God has.
"Tag, you're it, God"
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