Wednesday, Apr. 14, 2004 - 10:44 a.m.

So, its been a while....

I really don't want to work here anymore, I am miserable in this job. I dont' think it is teaching that is making me miserable, I think it is just this school and these kids. I hate it here. I have had three of my kids come up to me and tell me that they are not doing marching band next year becouse they want to play football, and then I have had more of them tell me they want to do cheerleading, I'm not going to have a marching band next year at this rate, and its going to suck ass. I really believe that this job is going to drive me to my grave, I'm nervous every morning when I come to work and that feeling doesn't go away untill I leave here, I mean there are days where I think I'm going to have a break down. I don't think I am the person for this job, but I have no other options at this point, I can't afford to quit, I mean we need the money, and once Tab and I get married we will need the insuance, so its not even an option to quit this job, and as for finding another well there just not there, I have a line on one job, but I found out this week that they have basically hired someone for the job already. I just don't know what to do, and its making me crazy, I'm tired and all I want to do is take one of tab's nerve pills and get high and go to sleep.

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