2004-06-30 6:43 a.m.
My first entry here.
The idea of this diary is to be as honest as possible, and to share thoughts and experiences that I wouldn't normally tell people I know. Since I won't really know anyone who will read this (hopefully), I don't have to worry about getting embarassed or anyone judging me. If anyone does judge me, who cares because I don't know them.
I don't know if I've ever been totally honest with anyone, including myself. I feel like this could be the place.
The problem with blogs is that when people start reading you, you want to maintain your audience. It makes you feel good that people are interested in your life. Then, instead of wanting to show the whole you, you just want to show the entertaining side of you. The parts of you that you sometimes want to write about, you end up leaving out because you think they are too boring for other people to read.
I can't say that for everyone, I guess I am just speaking from my personal experience.
I'm a complex person. I think we all are, even though we try to hide it sometimes.
A few things about me, to get the ball rolling:
- I swear a lot in writing, a lot fucking more than I do in real life.
- My self image sucks. I am working on it though.
- I was raised in a strong Christian home. I have strayed from the values that I was taught, and I have guilt because of it.
- I'm in my mid 20's and am single. I have had the same girlfriend for a while but in my mind it isn't serious. In her mind it is. I'm happy just where it is, and have no intention of doing anything crazy like proposing to her, at least not anytime soon, if ever.
That's all for now.
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introfucktion - 2004-06-30