11 January, 2005

It started off innocently enough, about 5 years ago. The occassional flirtation with a fireman that I found attractive. Even after I married, I continued the flirting, mainly because that's all I thought would ever become of it.

A few weeks ago I was sitting in my favorite Italian restaurant, alone, slightly disappointed because my favorite meal didn't turn out as expected and I couldn't decide what else I might want from the menu. I was in deep contemplation and then HE walked in (with his two kids). I smiled at him and returned to the menu. After a few moments, he walked over, leaned in really close and complimented me. OMG he smelled so damn good! Not to mention, he looked so damn sexy (as always!). He asked why I looked so sad and I explained about my favorite meal being ruined. Then his son comes over and the sexy fireman introduces me to his son and then says he'd better get back to his kids.

I can't decide on anything else to eat, so when the waitress returns, I just ask for the check. She says for me not to worry, that my salad and tea were on the house since the alfredo was ruined. I get up to leave and have to walk past HIS table to get out of the restaurant. So I say goodbye to him and smile at his kids. I no sooner get to the door, and HE is behind me. He follows me to the parking lot and says to hang on. He goes over to his truck and gets his business card and hands it to me. "Call me some time" he says as he goes back inside the restaurant. I sit in my car for what seems like forever, slightly stunned, slightly flattered, and completely flabbergasted over what to do next.

I have a wonderful husband who works hard but is gone all the time too. I don't know what he does on the road, but I have complete trust that he is being faithful. So why on earth am I contemplating being UNFAITHFUL to him?

But it has gone further than even contemplation. I finally called him, a week or so later and set a date to "meet" him. It didn't happen though because he ended up having a business engagement that he couldn't get out of. And then I have no idea what possessed me, but I called his answering service and left him a message in which I masterbated while on the phone and told him what he was missing. What on earth is wrong with me???? And then I called him again, later that night and made another date to meet him. Can I really go through with it? OMG I must be insane to even be considering this. Three years of faithfulness and I am thinking about throwing it all away because of a man I have flirted with for five years?!?

+ posted by lorianna66 at 10:01 p.m.

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