DiaryLand members area

Hey there would be very happy to get the address of your new diary. You can email it to me at [email protected] Thanks Take Care hope all is going well.

from mspsyched1 :

I'm glad that you decided to move instead of leaving completely. :D

from missspunk :

Hey would like to stay updated if you can email with your new location that would be great. [email protected]

from untamedwings :

I've missed you so much & have been so worried. I was going to call when I got the email but didn't know if I really should. I didn't want to invade the space you seemed to need. I'm here in any way that I can be for you. You have my email(untamedwings@gmail) or we can talk for real. Whatever you need my dear. Hugs & love ♥

from foursquare :

I know you've said you're without computer, but if you could update at some point?.. I'm really concerned about you. It's been so long since your last real entry. :(

from sanetwin :

I hope all is well. miss you.

from twangry :

Hello, it's Megin (again, again, again). I have a lot of reading to catch up on.

from impetuousme :

well alright then, I was just starting to put together a search party...

from penutgallry :

it's been a while...are you okay?

from goldieknox03 :

IM not sure what is going on anymore. you havent posted in days. And i havent heard from you at all. wish i had msn again so we could talk. I miss you and hope all is well. My prayers and thoughts are with you. Love, Jane

from untamedwings :

I've been thinking of you alot and hope you're ok. Love you sweets.

from sanetwin :

Your comment just me start crying. Thank you so much.

from penutgallry :

I love you. SO much! You are a wonderful mother. This too shall pass. Things WILL get better. And you MUST believe everything I say!! Love you. Tonses and tonses.

from impetuousme :

hey, what the hell? getting down on yourself about your parenting skills? come ON. You might be a mess in some ways, but being a good mother is TOTALLY not one of them. Seriously. Obviously, I am not there to see how things go, but in MY book, most of being a good mother, is being THERE, and caring. A lot. And acting on that. So, cool it lady, or I'll have to spam your ass or something. And as for the notes you left on my site. Mmm. Good to hear we are in some agreement on MJ. As for the other part. I'm not sure what you're point was, about the voting I mean. That we should NOT vote, becasue everybody is too idiotic to be trusted? Including the polticians, then what DO you suggest we do to settle these issues instead of debate them till the end of time? Sam

from kellbelle :

Thanks for your kind words. I'm really okay, I'm worried about telling Aubrey tomorrow. Please keep her and her dad's family in your thoughts and prayers.

from untamedwings :

Hugs honey & TY.

from yellowrosetx :

I guess I failed to mention that a group of us was supposed to go and our friends bailed. It was the one time I had a sitter, so I went with it! The whole time we talked about our families, jobs, his fiance, and my "friend" in Florida. I'm not one to sabotage others relationships, so please don't think that! I normally only talk to him through work and have only seen him twice(including my divorce hearing) outside of work! We are friends and that is it! But he is a nice guy and I enjoyed his company! Thanks for your thoughts!

from sanetwin :

LOL I did skip the 'C's. Darn I might have to go back and start again!

from crapshack :

Wow, that was an incredible compliment. Your kind words made my day. Thank you.

from penutgallry :

I love you, honey.

from sanetwin :

Des, thank you so so much for being there for me, even during this hard time period for you. Are you feeilng okay??

from penutgallry :

You are NOT crazy. Don't even say that about yourself. You have been through so much and are going through so much more. You need to take care of you for the first time. If there's anything I can do, let me know. I mean it. Even if it means taking a leave from my job and coming out there. I love you.

from o-jasmine-o :

Be strong. You know you are. Good luck finding yourself a plan. I'd advise not waiting till next year to leave... You'll find a way to pay off your car. Don't worry. x

from foursquare :

First off, thank-you so much for your recent notes. :) Second, way to go on starting to see a new therapist! You know you were a lot of the inspiration for finally getting me to start seeing someone, and I'm not just saying that, so I'm especially happy to see you starting it up again. Good for you! Unrelated to that, I am just frothing at the mouth over Diaryland right now. I have a free account (Andrew's fault, I'd pay if I didn't have to use Paypal) and I have not been able to post an entry for well over 24 hours. And I'm checking constantly! It's infuriating, especially because I was trying to get into the template editor just to copy my code and I can't do that either.

from impetuousme :

Wow, what got into you? Pictures an shit. Cute cat, cute kid, and totally adorable YOU! I can see now why eveyone so desires you... and it's not even the awsome knockers. :) sam ps I tried to post this on your commnets deal but it wouldnt work.. pss hope your blues are better...

from pumpkinhouse :

Hello mad poetess, drunk on red wine. Wait, that's my poem (never mind). About WW - hell yeah, I could definitely use a co-conspirator, um, diet buddy? The Core plan sounds good, but I have three kids who won't touch delicious, whole, healthy food. Tater tots are pretty much a staple here and until I can lick my fat/salt/sugar/chocolate cravings I'm relegated (that's twice today I've used that word) to Points.

from pinkbowshoe :

I just read your poetry, and I can't say enough how great it was! I kept reading and reading. Thank you so much for posting those, and sharing.

from sanetwin :

I think you'd make an excellent teacher!

from pashiesplace :

That last rhetorical question...just let it float around in your head. Your initial obvious answer & what is truly in your heart might actually be different. At least it was for me. I thought no way in hell would I ever feel anything remotely good again here. I was wrong.

from pashiesplace :

Thank you so much for your kindness. I may take you up on the offer. Laughter. Oh god. Without the ability to laugh in the most unfathomable situations I would truly be doomed. I figure as long as something or someone can still make me laugh then there is hope. How'd you like Idol last night? I thought Janay should have left instead of Aloha. Agreed with the guys though. Hugs.

from peytonsplace :

But of course, it's always about you. :)

from pashiesplace :

Hugs Des. I've been thinking of you an awful lot. I guess sort of sensing that silence equals internal struggle. (I know it does in my case anyway) I hate the way reality crashes in, time & again. Even when familiar it still packs such a punch.

from o-jasmine-o :

Oooooh. I've been away for a while and before I clicked the link to your diary I SO hoped you'd be feeling better by now. If I'm totally honest I even hoped you had separated from Brian... I'm so sorry things still haven't changed for you. Please find the strength to let him go... you know it's for the best.

from younameit :

Hey, Daze! I put you in my list of favorites for a reason! You cannot slow down or quit on us now! :-) Of course, I'm a hypocrite in writing that, though, because I've been going through a personal slump myself (hence my disappearance from the scene lately). Don't get too disillusioned. Besides, you need to keep doing your "practice writing" here at DiaryLand in preparation for that excellent novel I know you will be writing some day soon (I see that your grandfather agrees with me). Please keep up the great work.

from penutgallry :

I will join you in my prayers. I hope that you can at least feel some peace. Love you.

from impetuousme :

you're right of course. thank you for reminding me. sometimes the days get SO fucked up I can no longer see the light. thanks again. you are a true beacon amonst the waves. :) sam

from pashiesplace :

Your last entry was beautiful in an emotional sense. Within a few words you crossed into so many feeling- love, mother's love, confusion, lust, sadness, peace, calm, jealousy...-It just struck me as so very honest & so incredibly human. You are a wonderful, feeling woman. One that will sort out all of the haze eventually. You are too open to your emotions & too honest with yourself to settle for anything less than what will ultimately make you flourish. Hugs.

from missspunk :

Your welcome for the add. I have been reading you since you left the note for me on my diary. Your writting is excellent. You have a way with words and expressing your feelings. I wish I had even half that talent. I am pretty raw and say it like it is and leave nothing to the imagination many times. Anyways good luck with everything. I have may questions but rather then ask I will just wait and see if they are ever answered through your writtings. Take care of that precious boy and of course yourself.

from younameit :

This is in regard to your December 15, 2004 (2:54 PM), entry, you know..., the one with the really intriguing title? :-) Wow. It is excellent. I wondered if there was anyone else out there who approaches life the way I do. You are a rare person. Don't ever let the world turn you into a skeptic, at least as far as friendship and relationships go -- because it will certainly try to do so. -- Sincerely, YNI

from trulyfine09 :

Thank you so much for the sweet words. You know I appreciate them. I'm glad that there is someone out there who understands where I'm coming from...& I hope things get better & not worse. Thanks again though. It's nice to have some friends.

from kellbelle :

Yes, things will be just fine. Keep telling yourself this (even though you don't believe it sometimes). Eventually you will believe what you tell yourself and accept it as truth. Do you practice using any affirmations?

from clarity25 :

Hi, Thanks for the kind note you left me a few weeks back when I was struggling. I caught up with all your entries I missed when you were away, there is so much beauty and insight in your words. I really related with what you wrote in your recent entry and what you're struggling with. I can say that I've been there and it's hard. I hope things get better for you.

from pashiesplace :

Oh honey. Such a hard painful place to be in. Hang on tightly and let yourself feel what you need to. Hugs.

from o-jasmine-o :

I know that's the way it works... or in fact the way it feels it works. I haven't been married but I've had a similar situation I never wrote about in my diary because it was much too complex to put into words... but really. If you know you don't actually want a future like this and you don't want your next child with him, there IS NO other answer than to end it. And better sooner than later because the longer you wait, the more excuses you can find NOT to end it and the harder it gets. Take care x

from sanetwin :

Des - I am thankful that we "met" here. I value your friendship so much. Happy Thanksgiving!

from pashiesplace :

I truly felt every word of that. My tears are rolling for your pain. Our similar pain. That thought process is like a runaway train. Once one single thought pops into my head I'm doomed. It all floods back. All the things I know and all that I torture myself with. If the sex was lousy why did he keep going back...What power did she have to make him want to be there...How dare she be near my child...Never ends.

from krugerpak007 :

Thanks for your comments Des. You are always honest and always give me such good advice. One thing I have learned in these past few weeks is who my real friends are. So thanks. Your comments mean so much. You cheer up too-ok? Love xoxoxox

from foursquare :

Awww, that was sweet of you leaving a note and link & such in your entry, I was touched :) But seriously, just do it, make a few phone calls and get on it, you know you won't have any regrets when you find another therapist you like, right? Take care of yourself, and by the way, send my condolences to your carpet...

from sanetwin :

I just got your note and I wanted to reply to that but I also just read your most recent entry. So two part note! First, thank you so much. You are also one of my favorite reads. Your realy truly are. You and Kel I read every single time you update! Also, as to Brian being late - god you have every single right to worry. Every right to question. He doesn't DESERVE trust. He has to earn it and he hasn't!! I'm so sorry you had to go through that!

from sanetwin :

Des - you are such encouragement and such support for me. Every note I get from you brings a smile to my lips. Thank you so much for being such a wonderful friend. I love you, dear :).

from shewhowalks :

I'm only honest. You are one of the most precious people I know, and I think it's very important you know that. I love you sweetie, you're amazing! Keep fighting, you'll win, no matter the outcome, as long as you keep fighting. And know, that no matter what, I'm here. You can call me, day - night - any time at all. I'm ALWAYS here.

from mspsyched1 :

Just by reading what you say, I can see...you're getting there. Where "there" is, I dont know, but you're gonna get to a place where you can breathe easier, rest assured. You're amazing, I want you to know that. Beacuse I think somewhere along the line someone forgot to tell you and I think its important that you know it. (BIG HUGS!)

from pashiesplace :

You can't control your heart, it goes where it pleases and feels what it needs to- especially when your brain says otherwise. Sometimes when I feel most lost it turns out that I've actually been processing things more deeply. I emerge a bit more grounded once the fog clears. I hope something similar is happening for you. Huge hugs.

from cats-corner :

Let's see...you've got intelligence, charm, kindness, generousity, beauty and the uniqueness that is Desiree. Yeah, I think all of that can be reasonable compensation for not using seduction. :-* Love, cat

from shewhowalks :

I am so incredibly proud of you for not allowing yourself to hate him. It'll destroy you, and probably encourage him to continue to hurt you. You're a pillar of stregnth, and a fabulous person!

from firinne :

Thank you so much for your note. As always, your words offer me hope. You deserve all the happiness in the world. If it can happen to me, in small ways or large, it can happen to you as well.

from sweetone03 :

You are a really great writer, I really enjoy your diary and I am only at march of 2003. I have spent the past 2 and half hours here reading trying to catch up. I find alot of what you say things I want to say but I am afraid of who will read my diary. Like my boyfriend. I was wondering what does your husband do is he in the military??? I was reading the entry about the pay stub thing. I am so glad you made it to washington safe. Hope you have a great time.

from jonquill :

I have to say, I'm almost thankful you used the phrasing "they aren't even being men anymore." I was tempted to replace "hero" with "fucking man" throughout the entry.

from jonquill :

I appreciate the pep there. I shalt try, in the future, to be more often boring.

from gustaffe :

Hej again. I've followed your diary for some weeks now, and I have been trying to find something to say, to see if I could do something for you. This song by Tori Amos is the best I can think of. </td></tr><tr><td height='5'></td></tr><tr><td><div align='center'><table border='0' width='100%' style='border: 1 solid #6699FF' cellpadding='2'><tr><td width='100%' bgcolor='#6699FF'>Tori Amos lyrics :: 1000 Oceans lyrics</td></tr><tr><td width='100%'> These tears I've cried, I've cried a thousand oceans. And if it seems I'm flo...o...ating in the darkness, well, I can't believe that I would keep, keep you from flying. And I would cry a thousand more if that's what it takes to sail you home. Sail you home. Sail you home. I'm aware what the rules are, but you know that I will run. You know that I will... follow you. Over Silbury hill through the solar field. You know that I will... follow you. And if I find you, will you still remember m-playing at trains, Or does this li-little blue ball just fade away? Over Silbury hill through the solar field. You know that I will... follow you. I'm aware what the rules are, but you know that I will run. You know that I will... follow you. These tears I've cried, I've cried a thousand oceans. And if it seems I'm flo...o...ating in the darkness, well, I can't believe that I wouldn't keep, keep you from flying. So I would cry a thousand more if that's what it takes to sail you home. Sail you home. Sail you home. Sail... Sail you home...

from jonquill :

Thanks for the listing, and the compliment. I am humbled. Also, having read yours, I can't help but be impressed by your utter openness, both with events, and your emotions. It's staggering.

from firinne :

It's wonderful to hear. Thank you! Your diary is lovely as well, and I'm especially enamored by your reference to my favorite Elliott Smith song.

from dazzlinglife :

oh, darlin...you are more courageous than you could ever know. i send an enormous amount of love and comfort, and hope, too. remember hope? let's be happy. -emma

from dazzlinglife :

i was going to send best courage, but you have more than i could ever send your way. you are a strong soul and i know that this'll get better. good things happen to good people. they WILL, for you. tata, -emma

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