messages to evilsuicide:
(click here to add new message):
| from silentwounds : |
| oh lover girl. i've missed you so. you've been away far too long. i heart you so. xoxox lauren. |
| from sassysylvia : |
| From: "Jade Lee Culberson" <[email protected]> View Contact Details To: [email protected] Subject: the e-mail Date: Sat, 19 Jun 2004 20:55:12 -0500 Sylvia, Hi there. You asked in your diaryland what you had done this time. Well, I�m going to tell you. You want it in list form? Okay, good, here they are, in no particular order: (1) putting your guestbook on your personal website as being pink, when that is totally you copying my signature colour. (2) Putting me in the middle of drama I didn�t belong in and had nothing to do with. (3) Lying and saying that I�d repeated things about you that I hadn�t, which was clearly a lie �cause you couldn�t even give me one example of a thing I�d said. (3) Just being the typical loser asshole-bitch that you are. Yep, because that right there is enough. I can see why Mark would kill himself just to get away from you, because you�re just that horrible of a person. That�s why you can�t get a girlfriend. That�s why your husband doesn�t want to have sex with your old nasty twat. Your son will grow up to be a stoner just like you and your dead husband and if he is lucky he will kill himself and get away from you just like Mark did. Mark probably beat you because you deserved it. Were you yourself around him? That was a good enough reason, I�m sure. And you think you�re going to start a lot of drama with this e-mail, too, don�t you? Well, you fat lazy stupid bitch, I�m one step ahead of you there. I�m going to post it on diaryland for everyone to see so that you can�t turn it into anything else but what it is, me putting you in your place. But I will outline one thing first � this has NOTHING to do with Aaron and/or Ben. This is me saying this to you. I have no problem with Aaron and/or Ben! I have a problem with nosy, selfish, stupid, arrogant, bitches who have so little in their own lives that they get off by starting drama with everyone else. That, Sylvia, is what I have to say to you. ~jade~ |
| from writergrrl88 : |
| i'll really miss your journal ... but i understand the need to move on ... i'm guessing that your leaving means things got better - yes? |
| from zerodoll : |
| jackie! whats going on where are you going. i hope your ok. i will miss you. please dont hurt yourself ok? please. i love you. xo zerodoll |
| from highxglitter : |
| sent <3 |
| from wire-ending : |
| hey love, i know we havent been talking much lately but i just wanted you to know i really love and miss you alot. im so happy right now, i cant even describe it, and the best part is its happening for no reason. im thinking if things stay like this for a while longer maybe they will get better for good. my told me next summer he might be going to houston for a week or so. maybe we can meet each other, how awesome would that be? my friend and i were sitting outside today and talking about the vw stoner cars. they made me think of you. then when we were driving 3am came on the radio. i swear to god everything today reminded me of you. i miss you alot right now, i hope you're having a good day. |
| from highxglitter : |
| your parents raised you, its not your fault if you arent some honor student/super-child. really, its actually theirs. |
| from prosperpine : |
| Thought-provoking read - I hope things start looking up for you... That picture was great btw! |
| from caged-mia : |
| I thought that picture was hilarious. Some people just don't have the dry sense of humor to apreciate it. Where did you find it? :caged-mia: |
| from highxglitter : |
| that picture was hilarious |
| from psy-vamp : |
| I'm sorry if my previous comment was rude. you just didn't make any comment on the photo that you placed in there, so I didn't know what you were really trying to say with it. I'm sorry. xoxoxo. |
| from psy-vamp : |
| I can't believe you'd put a photo like that in your diary. *down the road* is for the suicidal. *across the street* is for the cutters. having to make the tough choice between the two, I think the latter is less bad. |
| from psy-vamp : |
| I'm sorry that you've been feeling anxious lately. feel better... xoxoxo. |
| from taste-less : |
| That Angelina picture is beautiful, and so are you. M |
| from twztdmind17 : |
| thanks for YOUR note. yes..his funeral is today and im dressed for it, and im sure people are gonna call me "goth" so stupid people. its sad but yeh i think everything will be ok. i hope you feel better. i g2g now. bell is ringing. bye love. -Courtney |
| from twztdmind17 : |
| hey...im' sorry about your friend. my friend died thursday night and friday at school some big fat girl said she was glad he died, some jock was like "oh the weird little goth kid? who cares" and some other girl said it was his fault he died bcuz of all the weed he smoked. i'm really sorrya bout your loss. people wouldn't stop talking about it friday either. i'm not trying to say i know what you're going through bcuz different people's pain are different. but i just want you to know if you ever wanna talk or nething my sn is shortygotback024 and my email address is [email protected] i hope you feel better! |
| from tyana05 : |
| hey, i want to talk to you...but you arent on. :(. hope you had a good day! talk to you tomorrow, hopefully. |
| from serratedtart : |
| thank you very very much. ♥♥ |
| from amber-darko : |
| Hi! My name's Amber and I'm 23. I am writing a book about my personal account of self hate and self harm. I'd like to include some personal stories from different stages in healing, different sexes and different ages to show that no one is the same, but we all are hurting in ways that we are unable to convey. I do not intend on printing names, there is no length restriction and I will not censor. I have decided to also include poetry or just general opinions. Please email me if you are interested. [email protected] |
| from beat-me : |
| you kick ass. and. luff |
| from tyana05 : |
| holy shit, you have seen drop dead fred!?!?!?!?! i fucking love that movie. i don't know anyone else whose ever seen it though. it's so funny. sooo, i was just wondering what the grading scale there is? in roanoke we have a grading scale of 94-100 is an A, 87-93 is a B, etc, etc...i'm really hoping that the one there is just a regular 10 point scale...i tried finding out on the school website but it didn't say anything about that. talk to you later! ∞tyana∞ |
| from writergrrl88 : |
| thanks for your support. so far, so good. :) ~lita~ |
| from tyana05 : |
| ok. i will im you. my sn is tyana87. talk to you later! |
| from tyana05 : |
| hi! i found your diary when i searched for houston diaries...well, i am moving there and i am going to be going to mayde creek...i am willing to talk to you if you want...if you read my diary you'll find that i used to cut (i got put in a freakin hospital for it though..twice but i still do occasionally), and that i'm going through the same thing right at this moment. i don't know anyone in houston...so maybe we could help each other out...:) |
| from miagoddess : |
| ok i'll IM you sometime...I live in Bellaire which isn't close but not far either from Cy-fair. I might be leaving though I don't know. Talk to you later. |
| from miagoddess : |
| Hey...yea I do live in Houston. I went to go see George Strait (wasn't my idea, was supposed to go for someone else). I do know how you feel right now, about suicide...it just never fucking ends, does it? |
| from alonehurts : |
| Yay I'm glad you're trying your best to get better. It makes me want to try too so thank you! Woooop happy early birthday! |
| from waterwisdom : |
| happy early birthday jackie |
| from highxglitter : |
| happy {upcoming} birthday. hope things turn out well for you. good luck on staying clean xo |
| from alonehurts : |
| I'm terribly sorry, Jackie. I hope you feel better! On a brighter note..I found out how to use my scanner so that means pictures for the computer nerd! Much love, Marisa. |
| from writergrrl88 : |
| good luck with everything. hope you're okay. feel better. *hugs* |
| from wire-ending : |
| what happened??? |
| from silentcrys13 : |
| Hi. I just stumbled across your journal in search for something to do. We seem to have a lot in common, especially our love for music and angelina jolie. Well, i must go. Hope you get out of that hospital quick. I cannpt stand them personally. Anycrap, tootles. |
| from highxglitter : |
| feel better <3 |
| from cryscrys58 : |
| :Hugs:..::WHISPERS"It's ok...It'll be ok":: Life tends to be shit...but one day...you'll hit the point where your used to it...and it won't hurt so much anymore. Things won't bother you so much because you don't care anymore... and maybe...you might go the other direction..and not hurt so much anymore because you dealt with it...either way... I hope things get better for you! Take Care. -Crystal |
| from writergrrl88 : |
| hi there. you don't know me, but i've been reading you diary recently. i found it through a few links off friends' pages, and i find it really interesting. one of the main reasons i find it interesting, though, is because i can relate. i'm 22 now and i've been through a lot of the shit you're going through now (not the exact same, everyone's different.) anyway, you can e-mail me at [email protected] or [email protected] if you ever want to talk. also, my AIM screenname is (you guessed it) Writergrrl88. |
| from highxglitter : |
| i know how you feel. its been 24 days since i've touched weed & im dying. id greatly appreciate a cigarette as well but i dont have any. |
| from wire-ending : |
| ya'll are weird. i dig pirates, do you dig pirates? I LOVE JACLYN KAY LIKE NO ONES BUISNES. LIKE WHOA. cheer up, honey, i hope you can. |
| from highxglitter : |
| feel better <3 |
| from imacarrot : |
| i'm praying for you |
| from alonehurts : |
| I'm sorry that I haven't talked to you for a long time. I hope everything is going well. E> |
| from beat-me : |
| i love you. |
| from groban83 : |
| Hugs, I hope everything does have a bright side soon for you. |
| from psy-vamp : |
| If she hits you, report her... |
| from wire-ending : |
| scary... |
| from beat-me : |
| i love you i love you i love you i love you... sorry so long. but. i love you i love you. and i love you... kitti |
| from mylifeat16 : |
| no, don't do that. lock it in stead, please. i really love reading your diary and especially older entries. :( |
| from sarahsundae : |
| //hugs I don't know you, but I know what you are going through. |
| from nonblonde427 : |
| i'm sorry if i hurt ur feelings :( i only meant to say that i've never read anything like ur diary and it just made me sad...but i am a loyal reader and i love it...especially the angelina layout...i'm so sorry...bai! |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love you i love you i love you i love you i miss you and i need you and im sorry. |
| from xtwstedsoulx : |
| Well, most of the people who buy Abercrombie and Fitch clothing are stuck up bitches. They would have to be to spend 60 dollars on a tank top. I am basing it on the school I go to; maybe your school or whatever is different. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i heart you. |
| from thequitter : |
| thanks a lot for the note. i do check them. im not sure i can handle the whole hiatus thing,,,, so ill write from time to time. or something like that. you have awesome favorite movies and i love the breakfast club. xx.<3. |
| from msbignickers : |
| wen i say for differant reasons it makes me sound like a lesbien so may i point out that i did not meen it that way |
| from msbignickers : |
| luv the diary. i like angelina joli 2 but obviously for differant reasons. xkatex |
| from deadthyme : |
| I think the word you are looking for is 'comfortable'. You are comfortable not when you're sad, but when you're depressed. Because it's what you're used to. I'm like that too- it's almost comforting because you've felt like that so often in the past, it's nostalgic. |
| from wire-ending : |
| jackie darling i love you. |
| from violent-sky : |
| dont worry <3. i'm not leaving for long. i just need to sort a few things out before i can come back. <33333333 vivica |
| from zerodoll : |
| wow, bipolar and loving miss jolie. sounds like me! your diary is hot. i love it. xoox sharla |
| from naimepas : |
| So this might sound kind of strange, but you remind me of how i used to be when i was 15. Especially the whole hating courtney love and loving nirvana. I think it's amazing. |
| from alonehurts : |
| Woah it's been quite a while since I've left Ms. Jackie a note now hasn't it?! Sigh good times..but yes..I have a surprise for you! It's about the chickfila cows... |
| from brokenmirror : |
| I <3 <3 you!!! =♥= |
| from redcracker5 : |
| Hello evilsuicide. I came accross your diary the other day, adn you have a very interesting life. Not much unlike my own. Your mind are telling you to follow your heart, but your heart is broken. I know how that feels than I wish to. I wish more than anything I could give you some words of comfort, but they aren't coming. As you probably know, death is not a good solution to this problem you have. it seems like an easy way out, but it won't be once it happens. Regret will be forced upon you. I want you to read a poem I wrote, but I haven't put it on the internet yet. I hope you will consider this, adn atleast wait. Just wondering, are you a Christian? If you are, that's wonderful, I can give you many Bible passages to read. If you aren't, I suggest you buy a Bible and begin your way on the road to freedom. God will set you free, He will share your loads and love you for eternity. |
| from sharpsecret : |
| im sorry things arent any better for u, i hope things do get better, and your head stops telling u that death is a good resolution.btw i love ur layout x |
| from wire-ending : |
| & you dotn want to be here in the future so you say the present's just a pleasant interruption to the past. |
| from wire-ending : |
| oh fuck...i told dan. he started asking about it and it came out. oh shit oh shit oh shit he cant hurt you because youre in texas but i actually have to see this kid...jesus what the fuck was i thinking. jackie stop me. please. |
| from wire-ending : |
| my daddy liked the josh tobin song. he was cracking up :)I LOVE YOU |
| from wire-ending : |
| i want to feel infinite again. can we run away? |
| from wire-ending : |
| I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU im sorry i wasnt here when you IMed me. I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU HOPE YOUR DAY WENT WELL |
| from evilsuicide : |
| where the fuck are you darling! get on the computer!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| from evilsuicide : |
| Today, I skipped 2nd period, and Kohls is right behind my school..and I bought these underwear that say DOLL.. heh! i love you. |
| from wire-ending : |
| I LOVE YOU TOO DOLL. screw your friends, come live with me and you can make all new friends and we can run away and do whatever the fuck we want and you can get lots of hugs and youll always have people to talk to and itll be good one day i promise. |
| from wire-ending : |
| KeVy WeVy4 life: and i didnt know that jackie lived in texas KeVy WeVy4 life: you failed to mention thatKeVy WeVy4 life: that wasnt very nice. HAHAHAHAHA |
| from wire-ending : |
| come home from school! i want to talk to you. and i know much more than i did back then but the more i learn the more i can't understand, and i've become content with this life that i lead where i drink too much and don't believe in much of anything. and i lie to myself and say "it's for the best." we're moving forward, but holding ourselves back. <3 straylight run and we're waiting on something that will never come |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love you a lot. |
| from wire-ending : |
| its still nice to get notes from you. love you doll. <3 |
| from xscar-mex : |
| I know you do hun, I know. I love you still. You'll always be my dreamcatcher...I tried calling today, I'll try another time. I love you hun. |
| from mistychristy : |
| i love your diary |
| from death-wisher : |
| sorry death-wisher got its wish. but we've got another one now. millencoiln and sharla~taye. byeeeeeee. |
| from scorpionkiss : |
| so_fucking_<3__<3___<3______<333 brilliant. [!!!!!!!] |
| from sephiragrace : |
| i like your layout. x |
| from silentxwords : |
| i read your diary again. except i read it backwards and i kept thinking how does this end?!? but i know how it ends. and im damn proud of you. |
| from wire-ending : |
| jackie i miss you, call me this weekend if you read this |
| from silentxwords : |
| I know you're lonely and you cry, wondering why I know it's lonely but if once, you could help me understand What it takes to be a man Look back on what you've said, and the life you've led Is it what you dreamed when you were young like me. Now it's time you took something back just for the sake of your mind. When I look into your eyes, I can see Life has buried you alive <3 yellowcard |
| from xonic : |
| hello darling. its been awhile. i knew youd get better. ive been getting better too. im still not cut free, but im so happy you are, really. |
| from wire-ending : |
| you can call me, doll, anytime. whether youre sad or happy or high or drunk, i dont care. if you want to talk i am here. 412.665.1458 |
| from wire-ending : |
| i know you have been say a lot that you dont think lauren and i need you anymore, but really i think its you that doesnt need us. I MEAN THIS IN A POSITIVE WAY, okay? i think that we were the thing that was holding you together for a while, but now i can see that things are getting better for you and it makes me so happy to see you like this. you have stopped cutting, you have wonderful friends that you see face to face. i couldnt be happier for you, darling, and i want you to know that even though things are changing now, you said yourself youre questioning things that you believe in. the summer is coming and its going fast but i want you to know that i will still love you forever and ever because you are my best friend and i couldnt ask for anything more from you. i love you, always remember that |
| from rinigrove : |
| Hey, I love your diary. I'm depressed too... I know what being like that is like. Seems to me i've gone through some of the shit youve gone through. Holding a knife close to your wrist and ask yourself if this life is really worth living. But I'm still alive. I don't know for how long... but for now. check my diary out too if ya want... |
| from wire-ending : |
| i think you are starting to outgrow the teen angst part of your life. i think you are starting to change into the woman you are going to be as an adult and im very proud of you jackie. |
| from suicidevirus : |
| I love the layout! |
| from wire-ending : |
| im very proud of you for stopping darling. i love you |
| from wire-ending : |
| i see that i have been lacking on the notes. i love you darling. one day...there will be no more of this and even though im the one feeling like shit right now i still want you to be happy because i love you and that would mean everything to me. |
| from alonehurts : |
| Hello Jackie! You're awesome! I'm goin to The Used tomorrow! I'm going to take pictures...and if I figure out how to scan stuff, then I can possibly send you some!...ehh and I suppose a picture of myself as well. Grr. Haha. Love ya! Bye! |
| from z0tl : |
| alrighty then... 1. you're very smart & pretty 2. if you tell me what you're wishing for, i will wish it for you on a nebula, i don't do stars 3. if you want to google for "self judge" and read the #1 result there, perchance you may find it useful someday. 0ff i go :z |
| from lonelyone14 : |
| hello. ur welcome 4 the e-mail. im doing fine. |
| from beat-me : |
| your layout... its mesmerizing... doll, i havent talked to you in so long... you can get a hold of yourself.jackie...... lick a lemon... i just did it... beauty lies onlly skin deep... i am rambling on and on... i love you as much as i can... all the oceans and all he skies wouldnt be able to hold all the blood that i share for you, that i will bleed for you... kitti & randi |
| from sharpsecret : |
| my family dont understand aswell.u are not sick,u need help.it was wrong of her to say that <3 |
| from wire-ending : |
| thank you darling. you made it better ♥ <3<3<3<3<3<3 |
| from bloodyheaven : |
| T(i love you)A(i love you)K(i love you)I(i love you)N(i love you)G(i love you)B(i love you)A(i love you)C(i love you)K(i love you)S(i love you)U(i love you)N(i love you)D(i love you)A(i love you)Y(i love you). There...16 times, because there are 16 letters in Taking Back Sunday and thats what I'm listening to. <333 |
| from silentxwords : |
| i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love youi love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you. there thats 40 times! i love you too. |
| from silentxwords : |
| the thing i wrote you..its up if you want to read it. its not very good but just remember i love you and i do need you no matter what you think. |
| from bloodyheaven : |
| Your never a bother hun, never. I love you so much, you and kate are my sisters...dont ever forget how much I need you. Because, even if you dont believe in these dreams of ours...I do and I know they wont be empty dreams for much longer. <333 Lauren |
| from serratedtart : |
| you seem like a wonderful person, kate tells me lots and lots about you. i was reading your diary and i really like the way you write. the art on your picture trail is wonderful. |
| from serratedtart : |
| why hello |
| from destroyable : |
| kristen sounds like a bitch, she should be the one in suffering and pain.. |
| from bloodyheaven : |
| I love you <333 |
| from ashes87 : |
| love you. |
| from naimepas : |
| so my name means "dont like" in french, i was angry when all the names i chose weren't working so i decided to type that in, thinking it wouldnt work...and i got stuck with it. oh well though. |
| from naimepas : |
| so i read some of the beginning of your diary and i just wanted to let you know that i am reading about your life and that i love the music you listen to. anti flag is great and i have lost two friends to suicide so i love the song suicidal dreams by silver chair even though it makes me cry. |
| from wire-ending : |
| &&& this is when you realize you are worth more than you think and you start to be okay again, & one day you will be happy, i swear. |
| from bloodyheaven : |
| I love you hun, forever and 2 days..more than you will ever know <3<3 Lauren |
| from silentxwords : |
| well im osrry yer leaving but you really scared me..im sorry i freaked out, i love you so much. more than i can tell you. |
| from silentxwords : |
| youre NOT going, i love you too much honey. im not letting you go. im going to hug you and hold you tight and everything will be ok because i love you and maybe that will keep you here. |
| from cry : |
| i found this and i thought you would like it...emptiness is loneliness and loneliness is cleanliness and cleanliness is godliness and god is empty,just like me. ♥ smashing/pumpkins |
| from bloodyheaven : |
| i love you doll, i love even after I die...because i cry when you hurt, and I know in my black heart, you dont deserve this...not that family, they are so pathetic and you are so much more...I love you, for ever and a day <3<3<3Lauren |
| from wire-ending : |
| i dont knwo what the fuck is wrong with me, 5 minutes ago i was laughing my ass off now im crying. i think im dead. |
| from wire-ending : |
| you cannot breathe, no everythings not right. where did you go, you forgot about all you left behind, its all on the table and you cant hurt anymore. emotions just cant be seen in the light,youre lost in here, you just disappear. [[[no.everythings.not.right.]]] |
| from wire-ending : |
| _____[[i.ll give you]]_everything/i/never/had/_ |
| from wire-ending : |
| ((( i wish that i could wrap you up in my arms and give you a hug that last forever &&& let you know that i love you, but i cant do that right now. i wish that you could see how much you mean to me. ))) |
| from wire-ending : |
| and its hard to dissect the truth, come to be the living proof. tolerate and comprimise, love the things you once despised...lying here im completely clear, its not going anywhere. sleeping in its pretending arms, some sort of friend who knew you and means no harm. lying here, im completely wake, [[complete]] knowing she will be foresaken. ITS A TEMPORARY PILL FOR THE HOPES YOU NEVER FILL. all i see is when im blind... |
| from wire-ending : |
| i -heart- you forver. |
| from wire-ending : |
| no worries, i was up anyways. i hope i get to talk to you soon. i need a hug =/ |
| from wire-ending : |
| i just realized my two o'clock isnt your two o'clock. i love you, dearie |
| from wire-ending : |
| are you fucking on right now? get on aim or msn |
| from melissa1983 : |
| Hi. I've been reading your diary, it's very interesting. It makes me sad. You seem like a really great person, and you don't deserve all the abuse from your mother and father. I hope you don't mind, but I added you to my contacts on MSN. I hope we can chat :) |
| from alonehurts : |
| Be careful Jackie. Hope to talk to you soon! Love you! |
| from wire-ending : |
| Wishing all the best for you, and now I'll say goodbye because all the shit that we've been through put wisdom in my eyes. So walk away, don't turn around, because I won't be standing here because all the lies I've been living through are becoming very clear.And beauty thus become. i love you jackie, more than anything. |
| from wire-ending : |
| im sorry i cant call, my fone is being a nazi and wont let me call long distance. im sorry. |
| from wire-ending : |
| what the hell happened? i called you but your mommy said you werent available to come to the phone. i love you and i hope you are ok. i will call you soon and you can tell me allll of your stories |
| from wire-ending : |
| i'll go on if it will make you happier. |
| from wire-ending : |
| its 2 in the morning and you have your away message on! what?!? you mean you arent awake, too? there is a banner above this box that is bright blue that reads "dont hate me because im gay, hate me becasue i dont find you attractive." funny funny. so yeah, im a bit out of it right now, i wish you were online so i could talk to you. bye. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i know i say this all the time, but i really do love you. you are like a sister to me, but closer. i wish there was something i could do to make you think you are as beautiful as you really are. nothing will tear us apart unless you start hating me. then i would be really sad and cry a lot because jackie hates me. keep writing, you are beautiful. |
| from alonehurts : |
| You are so talented Jackie. You write beautifully. Love you! |
| from misfited : |
| Hey! sup? Just dropping in to say Hi! So "HI!!!" catch you up! Missy!! xox |
| from wire-ending : |
| im coming. soon. i am saving you. and we are running away. we will be free. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i wish//i could write like that. but i cant. like so many other things. i cant i cant i cant save you even though i wish more than anything i could. i cant reach my arms far enough to give you a hug though so for now i will just have to tell you that i love you. i love you. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love your voice, you can make me feel so much better on the worst days. i love you. |
| from silentxwords : |
| im online but my damn msn wont let me on. im sorry. i love you so much, im glad you [[finally]] fot your gift. im so glad youre happy. i love you more than you will ever know |
| from wire-ending : |
| you are wonderful for many reasons. I cant tell you them all so i will just say a few. 1. you are a wonderful friend, even if you do lie. i lie a lot too. like whoa. A LOT. 2. you have a big heart that cares for people unconditionally. 3. you have it hard a lot of the time and you always manage to pull through even though you think you dont. 4. you are jackie and that just makes you amazing by itself. |
| from wire-ending : |
| every part of you is wonderful. |
| from alonehurts : |
| Hmm it's been a while since the Jackie got a note from the Marisa hasn't it? Herrre ya go! Love ya girl. Be careful naw! |
| from wire-ending : |
| i understand it. every last fucking bit of it. i love you, dont ever forget. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i will only be okay when i know that you are safe and i will never stop worrying. |
| from orange-cloud : |
| yeah, that ballaballay diary is a joke. hehe... - jen |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| Everything is going to be alright doll. Dont you dare give up on us...ever. I love you so much hun...always and forever. Please be okay |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love talking to you. just hearing your voice makes everything ok. im glad you are ok. <33333 |
| from wire-ending : |
| i tried calling your phone but i guess its not on. im so worried about you. jackie, please be ok. if you get this call me AS SOON AS YOU CAN. i love you more than anything. i will be on this weekend as much as possible just in case you are able to get on. i love you more than i can ever say. |
| from wire-ending : |
| you can come, it will be ok. lay your head down and say goodbye, lay your head down and start dreaming, wait for the time when you will live again. |
| from ashes87 : |
| you are so gorgeous. even my brother just said so, and he's very picky when it comes to girls. (assuming that was your pic you just posted). inside and out. fantastically splendidly wonderful. |
| from silentxwords : |
| i love you. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love acid bath. they have tabs for them here: http://mxtabs.net/songs.php?path=Guitar,a,27,Acid+Bath i really hate your mommy by the way, too. i love you <33 kate |
| from wire-ending : |
| one day i will make you alive again, i promise. go check your mail! it should be there by now! if its not i will go and castrate every male mailman. |
| from wire-ending : |
| if you told me that i would give you a hug and tell you how beautiful you are and love you forever and ever and even though i know its true, one day you will be alive again and all of us will live together happily maybe not at mad world but somewhere equally as wonderful and we will smile everyday. i love you, hun <3333 |
| from fallnsilent : |
| i miss you doll, all the fun in sending stuff to the other, i want you to know that i will alwaysbe with you, and never let a guy take away all that you had... kitti |
| from deadthyme : |
| Happy birthday Jackie dear (I think it's today, right?). |
| from wire-ending : |
| hahahah, thats funny. even if its true, what difference does it make if someone is gay/bi? sexuality has nothing to do with the person you are. people's ignorance never fails to amaze me. |
| from wire-ending : |
| why cant people just believe what they want? ::sigh:: |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| I love you jackie, my dreamcatcher...I'm crying for no reason tonight, thinking of calling you or kate because you both always make me feel better...I love you hun...I always will because you gave me hope when I had none...you gave me real dreams to believe in...and I love you for that, your the closest thing I have to a best friend...your my shining star..forever and always. <3 love ya, Lauren |
| from xonic : |
| you dont suck doll. the past couple days ive been talking to you made me really happy, kinda lifted me up for a bit. i really like talking to you, and i think youre really hot. your mom sucks. dont let her bring you down, or anyone else, cuz youre amazing, and your words and your soul are amazing. dont ever forget that. |
| from wire-ending : |
| im sorry, hun. i just read your bio. youve been through more than you ever should have to go through. you deserve so much more than this, i will try to make it better for you, even if its just small things. i love you <33 |
| from wire-ending : |
| i want to die as well. like whoa, you have no idea and there are only three people who keep me here: you, lauren, and kat. if one of you left that would be it. gone. i love you. if you go, i go. no joke. |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3I love you so much doll...I love you more than the rain, more than razors, more than my own blood spilling from my body...I love you because you make me happy...you and kate love me and I will live for you...no matter what...nothing will take me from you two...nothing. <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3 Lauren |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love you |
| from alonehurts : |
| In your eyes I see a darkness that torments you and in your head where it dwells. I'd give you my hand if you'd reach out and grab it. Let's walk away from this hell. <3 Marisa |
| from wire-ending : |
| youre not a failure, your beauty is remarkable. you have your whole life ahead of you and you cant let your mom bring you down. i am always here for you. i love you <333 |
| from wire-ending : |
| i dont know if that was a joke or what but i really hope you are ok. <333 |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I love you so much Jackie. Thank you for staying with us and keeping all of us diaryland readers company and comforting us. Thank you! |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| Forever and ever, kate and i will be your family, your best friends, and your way out. You know we are here Jackie, always, never shall we leave your side...never. We live for one another and kate lives for us and we live for her...and we will be happy. |
| from wire-ending : |
| when you are happy you make it not so bad to live. |
| from wire-ending : |
| lauren and i will be your family and we will love you forever and ever and we will always be happy and never feel any pain and be smiling because we know tat we are there for each other. i will try to make you happy the way you make me happy. i love you <3 |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| Dreams do come true...for us they will...we will be friends forever and nothing will ever change that...nothing. |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| I love you doll...I'll catch you whether you want me to or not, cuz I wont let you go...never... |
| from xonic : |
| my cuts on the left arm are never straight, theyre always all crooked and theyre not as deep as the ones on the right cuz i cant press hard enough, and theres always more on the right side then the left. weird, no? |
| from redthirst : |
| I read a bunch of your entries and wish I had found someone like you sooner. I have been through alot of the things you mention. Apparently as the youngest I was given the most hell. But anyways I sound conceded in this note. Don't commit suicide. Don't listen to any negatives people give you. You don't have to take it in...you shouldn't. It's your life and you shouldn't let people ruin it. I get depressed every now and then...I used to continuosly a while back and wanted to die so badly. I made plans I made dates everything. Then I knew I had a problem and read books about suicide and tried to change. I'm better now and seeing someone like you in so much pain hurts me so deeply....Please don't do anymore cutting or having suicidal thoughts...Oh god i sound like a rambling therapist....just leave me a note whenever you want I'm always available....(Steph) |
| from ceqs-e : |
| hey... read some of ur journal. pretty cool.. wait really cool so yeah thank you for keeping me busy in a productive way. take care & keep the flow. peace |
| from xonic : |
| i guess im not as strong as everyone thinks. i broke down yesterday and cut myself. three times. on both arms. and i was going to do more but i saw a picture of jen on the floor and dropped the knife. no one knows. and i love it. its my own little bloody secret. i feel more beautiful because of it. ive always seen pain as beauty. but ya anyways :) |
| from brokenmirror : |
| I so feel like you. Just yesterday I made a suicide pact with a close dland friend. We swore to keep on living for each other. I will never leave her. And i will never walk away from you, either xxxxxxMiranda |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love you hun <333 |
| from batmanlovesu : |
| hey you don't know me and i don't know you but your diary caught my eye and I read a lot of the entries. I just wanted to say you seem like a very strong person to be able to get through some of the stuff in your life and I hope it all works out for you and i wish you the best. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love it, its beautiful. talking to you and lauren was lots of fun. we have to do that again sometime when were not quite so hyper. <3333 kate |
| from brokenmirror : |
| Jackie, hun, dont you ever listen to asshats like that!!!!! There are always some fucking ignoarent freaks out there who cant take the look of a thin beautiful girl because they know very well that they will never be as pretty and smashing as she is!!!! If that author f the note you quoted really was 'that gorgeous' and if she really 'could lose oh so much weight' then why the fuck doesnt she shut up and just does it? Why does she comes over to insult you and tell you this shit? Exactly. Becasue its shit, and because shes nothing more than a FAT UGLY GIRL WHOS DYING WITH ENVY. So, and now go and and wear your beautiful head high up in the air. Youre damn beautiful, never forget that dearie. Happy valentines *mwah!!* |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| I love you Jackie...I just wanted you to know...forever and ever... |
| from wire-ending : |
| youre voice is lovely as well. im really excited about friday/saturday. im still hyper. yay. |
| from fallnsilent : |
| god dearest, i love you soo much, i love you, i want to cut soo bad, but, i feel that i am going to throw up everytime that i try, cut for me doll, cut for me... i love you soo much, and let that be known... kitti |
| from apockalyptik : |
| about that 'lynn' character who signed your guestbook.. first off, shes illiterate. honest to god.. lets see how many times we can say "your" instead of "you're." and another thing.. its nice and all that she can be so egotistical about the way she looks.. but i hate to be the one to break it to her that the whole world doesn't see every 'fat' person as being beautiful like she does. and hey.. ill even give her the benefit of the doubt and say shes nice to look out.. but that personality of hers doesnt seem to be all that beautiful to me. one more thing.. {yes.. im having a wonderful time tearing apart every inch of what she said to you} did you notice how she reffered to you as an item of food? [honey].. i just thought that was great. dont let her get to you.. she seems like a big. fat. biotch. |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| 43 people who need to go fuck a camel...don't ask, I just felt it worked. They're fucking assholes who need to be thrown into a fire pit. And I'd come and give you hugs all day so you didnt have to cut, cuz I wuv you Jackie! 500 teddies and counting...just wait...you'll see. I love you lots!!! <3 Lauren (not the mean ass one either, the one that loves you!) |
| from wire-ending : |
| fuck them. you dont need anyone like that. |
| from saftey-pin : |
| I dont hate you,and they have no bases to either.fuck them |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I don't hate you. Those 43 people are stupid and they deserve to die. Love ya! |
| from xonic : |
| girl, you are worth so much more than what youre doing to yourself. i was sitting in the corner of my school today all alone, and i wa sso depressed. i just wanted to die. if i had had a sharp something around me i wouldve slived myself up. but i didnt, so i sat and thought about it. and how its such a destructive thing to do. sure, i know its hard to stop, its addicting. but you dont need the blood. please stop doing this to yourself. theres got to be another way. write. play the guitar. slice something else up, not your precious flesh. ive only been talking to you for alittle bit, but i still think youre amazing and i know i would love you if we knew each other. you know you have good friends that truly care. take advantage of that. cry in their arms, but let them take away your cutting paraphenalia. i dont know. while i was thinking, i know i wouldve regreeted cutting myself if i really had done it. youre running from something. its not everything in general. its something and its haunting you from the inside out. i hope to god that you find that thing and kill it before you kill youself. you dont deserve it. youre beautiful. |
| from beat-me : |
| im back!!! almost, thank you for caring soo much, you brighten my day, as much as i wake up, i see your face, i thank you soo much girl... i hope that i can keep noting you... kitti as pritti as shit... yours to hold... katherine |
| from taste-less : |
| I know. But you and I cannot control what others do or think, but you can make sure you know what is right yourself. And no matter what you say they shouldn't. Not ever. |
| from by-blu : |
| as a fellow cutter i know it's hard to exlpain someone thats its an addiction, they just dont get how it makes things better. like the site by the way |
| from unworthypain : |
| *hugs her doll tightly* You have me...even if you don't believe hun...I love you with all my heart cuz your the one who's saved me from the plunge so many times, let me do the same for you...We'll make it through today just like we made it through yesterday...it might be bumpy but we'll make it...you'll see. Love you forever and ever, your doll Lauren |
| from cryscrys58 : |
| As much as I know how you feel about the wanting to die part..I don't think you should. You don't deserve none of that. As much as you think you do..you don't. I want to die so bad too but I don't really know what holds me back. Maybe it's my friends. Knowing that they care. I'm letting you know..that I care. I care about you. As much as I don't like the fact of you cutting i'm not going to tell you anything because..I do the same. But i'm not so addicted..I do it once in a while if u'd like to say that. Take Care, ok? If you need anyone to talk to..I'm here. I already gave you my AIM SN..but umm..you probably forgot it. Everyone does. Bye Jackie. T/C/C/I/C. -CrysZ |
| from taste-less : |
| I know I dont know you ect, but your new layout is gorgeous and please try and believe this: nobody has the right to hit you, you do not deserve it. |
| from xonic : |
| sounds like a cry for help. i would like you to stop cutting, but if its what you need right now...i dont know. if someone had taken away my blade when i cut, i wouldve done worse things to myself. its just a mind frame. when you choose to find the starting point of the bloosy stream inside, then you can choose to stop the blood from pouring on the outside. right now my mind is sick. im fascinated by the blood and the pain and the blade. but im not gonna cut. i realized along time ago it wasnt a very smart thing to do. so i drew blood to see it. i remember, when kyle was in my bed, he held out his arm and there was hardly any visible flesh, just all cuts, and i thought it was amazing. it made me want to rape him right then and there. maybe more mentally than physically though. it sucks that you have alot inside that makes you think you need to cut. but i understand how its addicting. when its time, youll find your way out. |
| from x-hidden-x : |
| I love you too hun...and just so you know, you look absolutely marvelous in ductape! hehe <3 Lauren |
| from xonic : |
| somehow i envy you in a sick dark way. i would love to feel the blade against my skin again. i would love to draw blood just to see what ive been keeping inside. i dont know how i deal with things anymore. ive been writing, but now i have writers block. jen would be angry if she knew i cut again. she doesnt understand. it did take alot of strenght to stop, but it was never really a weakness. my mind frame is changing. all i want is blackess and blood right now. its attractive. |
| from xonic : |
| you make me remember how much i loved to cut. how much i loved my own blood. my own red tears. the funny way it should hurt but its almost orgasmic. i stared long and hard at all my scars today. i wanted them to be fresh wounds. and i also looked at the picture you posted. i wanted to kiss your flesh shut, as if lips were suatering tools. i would love to know you. you are beautiful to me. |
| from unworthypain : |
| Of course you will get it...you'll be the first...and it's okay, no one's life is perfect...I'm just being selfish...but I cut deeper tonight and I couldnt get them to stop bleeding...and now I am panicking b/c I have Dance class and we wear short sleeves..before I didnt cut deep, the cuts were never bad enough to leave big scars...but now they are...and I dont know how to cover them... |
| from unworthypain : |
| Of course you will get it...you'll be the first...and it's okay, no one's life is perfect...I'm just being selfish...but I cut deeper tonight and I couldnt get them to stop bleeding...and now I am panicking b/c I have Dance class and we wear short sleeves..before I didnt cut deep, the cuts were never bad enough to leave big scars...but now they are...and I dont know how to cover them... |
| from unworthypain : |
| Let me come fall asleep with you...to sleep forever, a peaceful rest away from the world. Cause the world makes me cry and bled, and I'm tired of bleeding...I love you doll, Lauren |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Oh I love you dearly Jackie. You always have me. |
| from zerodoll : |
| iknow what is like, wanting to die. i know how it hurts when you get drunking and everything falls apart. i know what it feels like from inside of me ,and i hope you dont feel the same. i cant resist the blade. you are so much more that that. please hold on. if you please, please hold on. love, sharla |
| from unworthypain : |
| We are the coolest cuz we have issues! hehe and one day we will frolic(?) through the streets like pixies singing songs lol. Then we will stick our tongues at whoever gives us dirty looks. We will be happy lil gals! And I'll buy you four million and four bears to cuddle with!!! Mwhwhahahaha! I love you bunches Jackie! Here is a bunch of love for my favorite doll in the whole wide world!!! <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3 Lauren |
| from unworthypain : |
| I love you doll...and one day we will get better and be happy like it was always meant to be...i promise. love you, Lauren. |
| from wire-ending : |
| im glad you like thursday =D |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love you hunny <333 |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I'm still your friend! Yayyy! :) |
| from unworthypain : |
| I love you hun, my dreamcatcher. You can make it...I know you can, you won't be there too much longer. |
| from ashes87 : |
| don't let them get you down. i wish i could come and give you a hug right now. and i wish i could make you happy. *abra kadabra* happy yet??? |
| from cant-make-me : |
| hi, just found your diary and decided to say hi... i love your design! please take a look at my diary and maybe leave a note :o) |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Whoop whoop Jackie's here! Start the party! I'm a bit hyper...don't worry...I'll calm down...maybe...unless I go COMPLETELY crazy! I'm using those ...dots... again..just like you do! Cool outfit! And remember...I'M AT YOUR WEEEENDOW! Wuah hahahah! LATA! |
| from zerodoll : |
| im am so glad that you are ok jackie. i guess it takes being at your lowest to see that people really do care. it took me going to the hospital to realize that my friends even gave a shit about me. hopefully it wont come to that for you. love you, sharla |
| from brokenmirror : |
| Jackie, dear, Im so happy that youre ok, Im so happy that nothing happened today. I think these still moments are the real wonders of life, these dull moments are the best. xxxxRia |
| from unworthypain : |
| I love you times a trillion times a million times a billion times a gazillion times a bugillion times infinity!!! Hehehe, Love ya bunches doll, never forget! <3 Lauren, your doll. |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I love you Jackie. You had better not leave me. I gave you my password for my diary but you got offline. Love you! |
| from zerodoll : |
| oh dear i hope you are ok. please let me know. i am worried and im thinking of you. im going to add you to my MSN contacts if thats ok. i would like to talk. love, sharla |
| from xonic : |
| hey. i stumbled across your diary late tonight and it made me cry. i think your tortured, but beautiful... |
| from unworthypain : |
| You'll make it through tonight doll, I believe in you. I know you will because your a strong girl. You can surpass their hate. Your better then them, too good to be in that "family". I love you doll, oh so much. I will make our dream come true. I'll get you out. Love you with all my heart, Lauren |
| from unworthypain : |
| You make me happy doll, oh so happy. I live for you. I love you so much, with all my heart. I'll cry for you tonight, and dream of taking you away from there. Cuz I want to sooo bad. And I will. Just you wait. I am working real hard to get a car and a license. Don't worry doll, it wont last much longer, it wont. Promise. |
| from wire-ending : |
| im going to beat up your mom. thats not nice, parents are supposed to hurt their kids. <3333 |
| from unworthypain : |
| wow...that's amazing. I'd have to say thats one of my favorite poems of yours every...besides the one you wrote me personally! heh. I printed it out and hung it in my room, to read it every morning and think my doll loves me. Love ya with all my <3 Lauren |
| from unworthypain : |
| The point is you were willing to fix what you had done doll, you made it better...most people wouldn't even care enough to apologize. Plus you made him smile! <3 Lauren |
| from unworthypain : |
| Sitting at school...wishing you were here to save me from these people. Sitting here and missing my doll. Can't wait until I get home, so then I can talk to you! I love you bunches doll, my one and only dreamcatcher...I'm so alone and sad here...at this terrible cement jail called school...wishing to be there with you. I feel like crying...I love you doll. Love you with all my heart... |
| from unworthypain : |
| I wish I went to school with you doll, I would make it all better...all those stupid people need to be kicked in the ass and sent on their way. Wish everyone would mind their business. Love ya lots doll |
| from defeated : |
| oh mah god. i read some of your entries this morning. good lord girl, you rock mah world. woah now. ha, im kinda at a loss for words. thanks =) |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Yayyyy I'm glad that I make you happy! Yippy! Love ya Jackie! Wuah wuah! |
| from unworthypain : |
| Yay...I get to talk to my doll! |
| from unworthypain : |
| Do you have MSN messenger doll? If not, do you have an e-mail I can talk to you at? |
| from unworthypain : |
| I love that song...fills a void everytime I hear it... |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'm glad you stay for me doll, I stay for you. My one hope of happiness. I love you so much Jackie. Our Dream -will- come true and we will be forever happy, like we deserve. Its okay if you cut again, you tried and thats what counts. I'm just happy your alive still, without you I'd be lost doll. <3 Lauren |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Weird...the other day I just wrote down the lyrics to My Suicidal Dream in my paper journal thing and then I see them in your diary. How ironic. But I'm telapathic :) Haha that had nothing to really do with what I was saying before..but just so you know. wahoO! |
| from zerodoll : |
| this is probably a very stupid question so forgive me. but are you going to be ok? this is just me being a bit worried. i think i should. love, sharla |
| from ashes87 : |
| live!!!! you need to see the reailty. and the reality is... you are wonderful and beaitful. don't hurt yourself please, because if you do, you hurt everyone who cares about you (including me). |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'm so proud of you doll! 4 days is good. I hope you can try to keep it up, try hard as you can. I stopped scratching my wrists with stuff cuz they started leaving big marks and the worry of someone seeing got to me so I couldnt do it anymore. I looked everywhere for the Jack Off Jill cd. I wanted to buy it so I could listen to "Strawberry Gashes" over and over and over, cuz everytime I hear it I get happy cuz it reminds me of you. I don't know what I would do without you doll, I love you with every ounce of this beating heart. I love you Jackie, forever and ever. |
| from zerodoll : |
| people are fucking stupid. no one understands until they go through it, depression or whatever and its never the same thing you know. keep trying to write. love, sharla |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Forget that stupid bitch that calls you a faker and poser. Don't let her get to you. I know it's hard but try. Pleassssee try. Don't leave. You're my good luck charm :) Love you! |
| from unworthypain : |
| services* not surfaces. Love ya doll |
| from unworthypain : |
| So much has happened...and your the only person I want to tell it to...my parents, my therapist...they took me to a hospital for suicidal/depressed teens...the looney bin...I was scared and I convinced them to let me go home. Jackie, if you go...I'm gone. I want to help you doll, I love you so much. Your the only reason I made it this far. Please don't go. Call the child protective surfaces on your parents doll, they shouldnt hurt you. Come live with me... |
| from wire-ending : |
| i love you jackie, be careful. i know exactly how you feel and i hate how there is nothing i can do to help you. well, if you want to talk, you know my AIM name. <333 |
| from unworthypain : |
| I read your note and your diary and I knew...I knew I might be beautiful, but if you say I am beautiful, then I must be..because only your words hold truth in my heart. And I love you so much doll cause you make me smile and made me cry happy tears and I didnt think I would stop. You think I'm beautiful and now no one's words can bring me down. I love you Jackie. You wash the pain away. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I wish I went to school with you doll, I'd tell all those stupid ass people to fuck off...they don't know anything! Grr....people like that piss me off. Well, I love ya doll, don't let the assholes get you down. |
| from just-fine : |
| Your words scream at me, painful but so beautiful...xox |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'd never lock you out doll! Your my everything. I listened to Jack Off Jill's "Strawbery Gashes" on repeat all day, even at school and I was happy cause the song reminds me of you. Since you have the lyrics on your diary I always think of you when I hear it. So I drowned out the world today with that song and I rehearsed all your notes in my mind and I smiled real smiles because I know your my savior, your so amazing it's hard to imagine anyone could dislike such a beautiful girl. I thought I will make it through this life because Jackie believes in me...someone believes in me...not just someone...Jackie, my doll, my dreamcatcher, my pill. I love you so much doll. Soon we will have all our dreams come true and we'll LIVE. Something that sounds so awful, but we will make life into something beautiful, something worth living, you and me shall be happy. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I locked my diary. The username and password to get in are the same: unworthypain. Love ya! |
| from unworthypain : |
| Boys are evil. They have the power to make you feel like shit and other times make you feel so wonderful. But we can hate them when they are evil, just remember sometimes they are good. |
| from zerodoll : |
| just found your diary and its lovely. ill keep reading because you have sparked my interest. and oh yes kewl fucking pics. love, sharla |
| from brokenmirror : |
| I love you, jackie, dont give up on ppl. They can be horrible asshats, yes, they can put you down, but only if you allow them to do that. you are so much better than this, you are so much more beautiful, dont give in to them, dont give them power over you. Stay beautiful xxxxRia |
| from unworthypain : |
| Real smiles play across my lips everytime I hear a song that reminds me of you or if I read your diary or a note. Real smiles come from you. |
| from wire-ending : |
| your notes mean so much to me. thank you <333 |
| from hrd2beme : |
| yeah... your right it does suck. And when they convince all of your friends and try to convince your boyfriend it sucks anymore. God, I feel like they TRY to make me commit suicide... but i can try not to. I try not to be anorexic~ though thats what they all referr to me as. Im not even thin... i dont get it. Was I a fuck up or a mistake? I really cant tell. |
| from unworthypain : |
| Aww...Brandon seems terrific...I smiled all day cuz I knew you were happy...made me smile with happiness. It makes me so happy to know your doing better. I love when your happy, it makes my day and now I'm happy! Heh...love ya bunches doll! |
| from hrd2beme : |
| Hey, i read your diary. You seem cool... I like your hair! |
| from deadthyme : |
| what you need are some REAL friends... |
| from deadthyme : |
| I really liked your last entry. That same thing happened to me about a month ago. Isn't it nice when totally fucked up people can still be loved? |
| from unworthypain : |
| does it really matter if i go doll? i want to live but everyone has given up on me, no one wants to get involved w/ complicated lauren...i am a plague to them...I need a friend here who understands. You keep saying you want to die so badly...but I want you to live and I'm scared to death you might leave me in this world alone. We both have to be strong so we can make our dream come true. I want atleast one of my dreams to come true. I hold our dream above all the others I have...i love you hun. |
| from deadthyme : |
| heh- you're as screwed up as i am! |
| from unworthypain : |
| We're all giving up...to nothingness. I will soon leave the earth as I once knew I would...slipping away from life sounds so blissful...so nice... |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Oh I absolutely LOVE my poem Jackie! Thank you!! I cried when I read it, it's so beautiful. Why can't people here care about me like you do? I only wish I was that good at writing...then I would write you a poem also. Love you Jackie! Thank you again! |
| from unworthypain : |
| I do the same thing doll. I thought I was just weird but now that I know I am not, well I feel better heh. I get so down sometimes and I just read all the beautiful words you've written me. Even when I just need a smile, your words can make me smile, cry, and so much more so easily. Love ya Jackie |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'll try that. Thanks doll. Love ya |
| from unworthypain : |
| Thank you hun. I love ya lots. |
| from unworthypain : |
| My doll, My Jackie, My dreamcatcher...you can be strong, can't you? I hate your mommy for hurting you...she should be hurt, to feel pain. My poor Jackie, please don't leave me alone in this world...I wont last an hour without you...is this it? Life ends here...without you to guide my way, I am nothing, forever lost. Atleast I can join you in death my dear doll... |
| from unworthypain : |
| My doll, My Jackie, My dreamcatcher...you can be strong, can't you? I hate your mommy for hurting you...she should be hurt, to feel pain. My poor Jackie, please don't leave me alone in this world...I wont last an hour without you...is this it? Life ends here...without you to guide my way, I am nothing, forever lost. Atleast I can join you in death my dear doll... |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I hate your family. They shouldn't do that to you. You're so strong and you get through it. I look up to you alot. I love you Jackie. Just look forward to coming to Iowa. Haha. |
| from unworthypain : |
| Wow...that's all I can say. WoW. I cried when I read your note. I was so amazed, you make me so happy with you beautiful words! I love you doll! Your more amazing then amazing...your words, your beautiful self cannot be described with human words. |
| from deadthyme : |
| thank you for adding me to your favs. what part ov houston do you live in (i'm on the extreme north side). |
| from wire-ending : |
| beautiful. youre on my aim buddy list, ill get up enough nerve and im you one day. <333 |
| from anti-child : |
| i set up my notes now .. and ill make my profile later |
| from unworthypain : |
| Hey Jackie...yay's for her doll's car and thinks about getting her license since she will be 16 on the 25th! Yay! Our dream will come true! I love you doll, forever and ever and ever...and ever... |
| from unworthypain : |
| Hey Jackie...yay's for her doll's car and thinks about getting her license since she will be 16 on the 25th! Yay! Our dream will come true! I love you doll, forever and ever and ever...and ever... |
| from gingerxbread : |
| go here: http://members.diaryland.com/edit/faq/extrapages.phtml that first q&a is probably what you mean. xoxxx tracey |
| from deadthyme : |
| I know ov the scars which you speak... (at times I thought there is no heart- only scar tissue). Life is pain. But your strength is awesome. That's one reason I made you a fav. You rule! |
| from beat-me : |
| i dont know doll, just sit, and not give a shit, i hope, i love you much, i really do, i am here for you./... io want you to live |
| from beat-me : |
| yesterday, i saw you, tomorrow, i will make me image you in my head... at the moment, i am describing you to my lost hope, setting it out to find you... just let me fall... kitti... i love you soo much, i just dont know anymore |
| from sharpsecret : |
| [email protected] dont supose u wanna talk to me |
| from wire-ending : |
| glad to see youre happy |
| from beat-me : |
| thank you, you make me smile, i can hardly see the screen, my face is too covered in tears |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'd never walk away from you...I'd hug you tightly and cry with you forever...my tears would flow for eternity if it could erase your pain...you don't deserve the pain you have recieved. I love you Jackie...just take some time away from the world...sit in your room or something for awhile...write everything down and let it out...lay there and listen to music...just let your mind relax. It will come back to you in time, don't worry doll. |
| from anti-child : |
| Hi, i read all of your diarys. i just got this thing. we seem a lot alike. i feel so alone. i like your writings. theyre so true. i hate my parents too. i hope to be friends |
| from unworthypain : |
| I love you so much doll, I just wanted you to know that! We're gonna run away some day...drive off into the sunset and make something of ourselves...we'll show them ALL...we're special in our own ways, we are worthy of breathing and they will all see that...We have to stay strong for each other and the others on Diaryland until the day we are free comes...I love you hun, more then you'll ever know...your my reason for living, for breathing, for trying to get better. |
| from wire-ending : |
| i hate how people treat me like im 5 too. it bites. parents dont know what teenagers do these days =/ anyways, thanks for the note, our parents should run away together. <333 |
| from unworthypain : |
| You feel nothing but nothing...the disease is spreading quickly among us...we are beginning to fall into the big hole of nothingness. But something will come, soon...hopefully it won't be too late. I love you Jackie, your a whole lot of something to me... |
| from unworthypain : |
| I cried when I read your note, then I fell asleep with an infectous smile...I could have died from happiness last night when I read your note Jackie...never have I been so sure that someone actually cared...really truly cared...I love you so much doll! Thank you for being so beautiful with your words...*hugs Jackie tightly thinking she has something to live for now* |
| from gingerxbread : |
| stand up to yr daddy. i did it, you can do it. this one time. he was throwing me down and against the wall and you know what i did? i bit him. he put his hand in my face and i effin' chomped down on that sonofabitch. he let go of me and started screaming and i kept my hold and he begged me to let go and so i did, and there was blood and he called me a monster. you have to have some courage, you can hurt him much more than he can hurt you. be strong. (p/s)thankyou♥ |
| from wire-ending : |
| your dad hurts you? its the same with my mom *hugs* sorry, hun. you shouldnt have to go through that |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I'll come kidnapp you! Muahaha! I'll bring you here to Iowa! We can meet up with all of your other diaryland friends and we can all run away together. |
| from shtrdsoul : |
| I love your diary for two reasons, one because you have the same pic as I do, it expresses so much, and two your writing . . . that fact that you are living thru it. come read mine |
| from unworthypain : |
| Soon I will take you from that horrid place...I'll kidnap you...our dreams will come true...I'll heal your bruises and make it all better with one word...forever we shall be happy...and it all starts soon...soon...does it come fast enough? |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I miss you. It sucks that you can't get online. And please eat. You told me to eat so I did for you. Now I'm telling you to. Take care. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'm doing okay...still breathing, how bout you doll? I love you too... |
| from fallnsilent : |
| your loved... come and join me... i cut too today... i carved "FUCK" into my arm, you made a pritti bracelet... yay for jackie!!! nighty night... its like 2 in think... i love you... KIttI |
| from unworthypain : |
| *wipes away her happy tears* I love you so much Jackie! I wish I could have come and made snow angels with you! |
| from unworthypain : |
| I love you Jackie, I just wanted you to know doll. I'm going to my grandma's house for Christmas, yay? ugh...I hate holidays. Merry Christmas hun, hope yours is better than mine. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'll be coming home today, so I'll see you later ok? Love you lots Jackie! |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Just got your note. Hopefully you're having fun in Maryland. Welp I dunno what else to say! Later Days. |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I cry every time I read a note you give me. You actually make me feel loved and wanted...no one here makes me feel like that. Thank you. Love you Jackie! -Marisa- |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I'm online right now but you're away. I will hopefully talk to you later! |
| from unworthypain : |
| I love you too Jackie...don't use alcohol to forget all your problems, use a healthy outlet, use me....use me to forget your problems. If you choose not to, then atleast be safe when drinking... |
| from just-fine : |
| I just wanted to say i hope things get better for you. Your words scream at me, i cut too, wishing i could bleed out all that is me, i understand. Love Claire xoxo |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Yay I'm glad that you can write again! Hope you have fun at your cousin's house! Be careful with those sleeping pills....love ya! |
| from brokenmirror : |
| I'm leaving for Rome now and I don't know if I can get online there, I promise to try my best! So I wish you merry merry xmas, I heart you lots, celebrate New Year as loud as you can and be happy, darling, you deserve it. xxxxRia |
| from brokenmirror : |
| *just read your note* It is so hard. So difficult. I mean, I have tried to kill myself once, my best friend and my bf both committed suicide, I sliced myself up and tried to bleed out. And now look at me. Right now I feel happy and its so hard to understand or believe. I think it is easier to explain why you are depressed than to find out why you are happy. I think I feel better right now because I have experienced a lot of support. I got closer to some gorgeous ppl than I had ever thought I would. Talking - or even just writing - with someone really helps a lot. I would have never believed it. I'm still not stable. I can feel lonely from one moment to the next and then I get a text message out of the blue and Im *happy* again. I'm not sure how to help you, I so want to do something to make you feel better, and all I can offer you is to be there for you if you want to talk. it really has helped me alot to start writing about suicide with one of my now best friends. So if you ever want to talk, I'm here, just send an email to [email protected] you are beautiful, dear, you really are. I heart you. xxxxMiranda |
| from brokenmirror : |
| You are right Tantric are wonderful and I'm glad you re-discovered their music again. You also NEED to check out Onelinedrawing, it is Jonah's fault that I have been on a high for more than a week now. He calmed me so much xxxxx |
| from beat-me : |
| when will we meet? when will we be able to cry together, and slice together??? when doll, when... kitti |
| from sharpsecret : |
| thank u put u as a fave for making me smile for the first time in ages |
| from brokenmirror : |
| Oh goddess I dont really know what to say. I have been there so many times you should thinkm I have learned the right words and still.. you are so beautiful, I heart you doll, please please stay alive. I be g you xxxx |
| from beat-me : |
| never never my dearest doll, for we can build on each other, rise to the top, but, we mustn't drop... i love you girl, you give me the chills, dont do it love, for i am your dove, please come and live your life of hate under my wing, maybe it will learn another feeling, TRUE LOVE for all i supply it with is pure hate, but, not for long, jump on in and we will plumit to the ground... i love you jackie... the other fuck up... katherine |
| from unworthypain : |
| If your happy Jackie, the reward in the end will be much more satisfying. We will get to ride off into that sunset and be forever happy, with nothing there to ever spoil the smile upon our faces. If your strong, which I know you can be, it will all pay off in our new beginning. *hugs Jackie* We can be strong and make it...we can. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I never thought I was -normal-...anything but really. I just hope you can be happy Jackie, just try please hun, try to be happy...be happy with me, my pain is yours. I don't want you to be in pain anymore doll. |
| from unworthypain : |
| Thank you doll...thank you for being strong... I love ya Jackie |
| from beat-me : |
| come live with me, i will fill your needs, i will be your blade, let me cut you up, i will... fuck up me |
| from unworthypain : |
| *holds Jackie and hugs her tightly* You have to be strong hun, for the dream we have...to ride off into the sunset and leave all the demons behind. I am being strong for you, be strong for me...please. Your my dreamcatcher, your helping me to keep all the bad away and to stand strong on wobbly knees. Please, do the same for me doll. Please...I love you hun. Your not a fuck up to me, your beautiful in every way and I just wish everyone could see that. |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Young girl don't cry. I'll be right here when your world starts to fall. Young girl it's alright. Your tears will dry,you'll soon be free to fly. Young girl don't hide. You'll never change if you just run away. Young girl just hold tight. Soon you're gonna see your brighter day. Erm I guess it's by Christina Aguilera? I'm not for sure, and I know you hate her so forgive me for putting that in here. But some things I see/read remind me of you and that is why I shared this with you. -*Your good luck charm*- |
| from knoxbronson : |
| Dear little girl- Will you please get some help - go to AA, perhaps? Otherwise you will end up like my brother (cocaine/alcohol/pills suicide), my sister (speed overdose death), dad, alcohol killed him, mom, same. Me? Sober 12 years tomorrow & very happy. But very worried about you. |
| from fallnsilent : |
| you are doing soo well on your own, just smile and keep up the alive, you can do it girl, i believe you, i really do |
| from beat-me : |
| jackie, come and play with me, come and die with me, come and fall with me, love always, your one and only... katherine |
| from unworthypain : |
| lol *throws a bunch of bread at her* Yummy. Bread! |
| from unworthypain : |
| Heya! Thanks for flooding me with all your purty notes! lol. I counted them, you have about 27(if I counted right) on my notes page! YAY! You have the most! Love ya! |
| from unworthypain : |
| *hugs Jackie tightly* I love ya too hun! |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Thank you for loving me. |
| from unworthypain : |
| Read my diary hun, I wrote the poem down! |
| from beat-me : |
| thank you soo much, you make me smile too, i love you, you are now my little girl, i am adopting you, even though you might be older than me, but, you are going to be mine, under my love, under my care, i will always be there for you, i will love you, never hit, i will show you the way to fly, show you the way to die, i will make all your dreams come ture, i will turn you over and search for the happy button, and when i have found it, i will push on, then push off, for it is not happy that i seek, it is the truth... i love you doll... katherine |
| from unworthypain : |
| I wrote you a poem Jackie...but I need to fix it up, I'll write it in my diary later today...bye hun! Love ya my dreamcatcher |
| from beat-me : |
| if only i could show you me, if only i could hold you until i freeze, if i would die, i would take me with you, and, maybe you would take you you with me, i love you soo much jackie, and, i dont know, nothing to express feelings that i have for you... never will i be more happy than in the shadow of your evil... to no avail, hold my heart out on your hand, and throw it, make it real, calous it, and bruise it, call it what you want, i love you... katherine |
| from unworthypain : |
| *smiles hugging Jackie* I love ya hun, your poem was beautiful and I feel so much better now. Never has anyone written me such a beautiful poem...one day, some day we shall ride off into the sunset and chase all those demons away and leave them behind. We will live carefree...together as the best of friends cuz I love you Jackie. I will make you a poem, I will try my best. It will come straight from my heart. Today I am going to tell my therapist about you and let her know how wonderful you are. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I have enough tears to make us an ocean, we can have our own island and leave the world behind. I know how to cry but I know nothing of how to bleed, you'll show me won't you? Take these pale innocent wrists and make them over, won't you? Decorate them with strawberry gashes and let the pain slip out with the driplets of virgin blood...take this fake innocence from my wrists...be my dreamcatcher. Make it all better and I will kiss your bruised heart and make it all better. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I have enough tears to make us an ocean, we can have our own island and leave the world behind. I know how to cry but I know nothing of how to bleed, you'll show me won't you? Take these pale innocent wrists and make them over, won't you? Decorate them with strawberry gashes and let the pain slip out with the driplets of virgin blood...take this fake innocence from my wrists...be my dreamcatcher. Make it all better and I will kiss your bruised heart and make it all better. |
| from unworthypain : |
| My dreamcatcher...you make it all sound so simple...so easy. I wish we could ride off into the sunset and be the best of friends and leave everyone and everything behind. I want to start over , we can be bestest friends and change the world as we knew it. I love you hun, we can make it all right for each other. I need a best friend about now, thank you for being here Jackie. I promise, but I will live for as long as I can, and I'll do it all for you. |
| from unworthypain : |
| I'm glad your happy Jackie...and thanks for the poem, it made me feel loved! heh |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Yaya Jackies got a boytoy! WahoO! I want a boyfriend! :( Ha Bye! |
| from unworthypain : |
| It's okay that you didn't write down the poems, I'd love to hear them though...I could use a good poem bout now though. Love ya girl |
| from urwhitedove : |
| i love you |
| from deadblckrose : |
| i'd hold you for all the days. until the day we die together, even then I'll still be holding you. |
| from unworthypain : |
| -You are the serenity which makes life beautiful, the bandage which stops the crimson blood from flowing from my veins, the dreamcatcher which catches all the bad thoughts and dreams which try to damage me, your are the pill which eases the pain and suffering this world has come to bestow upon me, you are Jackie...the most amazing and the bravest person I have ever come to know- I love ya Jackie...I don't want to hurt anymore, I don't want you to hurt anymore. My life's goal is to make you happy. What's Yours Is Mine, the pain, the joy, the anger. |
| from urwhitedove : |
| doll, i am seriously not all that great, i mean, if i am soo great, why does the one that i love the most treat me like shit, and morgan, i tell her everyday, and, nothing, but, i am fine with it, cause, i have you, and you have me, we have each other, and we are going to make it in our lives, we are going to fucking survive, we are... that is my promise to you... kitti |
| from unworthypain : |
| *smiles thinking she feels the same way, the world could come crashing down but if Jackie was there she wouldn't care, cuz she would know someone in this god forsaken world made life seem beautiful for once* I want to hear your beautiful poems... your poems make life seem so wonderful, it makes me feel so loved. |
| from unworthypain : |
| *claps with Jackie as she chants* I'm free! yay! This is a huge deal for me, lol, it has a lot of meaning to me to not be in her shadow anymore...I'm free. Love ya Jackie! |
| from unworthypain : |
| The first day of my life that I smiled and wasn't faking it...I don't have to pretend anymore. Thanks to you Jackie... |
| from unworthypain : |
| *smiles thinking Jackie's notes always seem to make her days complete* What's Mine Is Yours...I don't want to hurt anymore...I don't want you to hurt anymore...your so poetic Jackie, I love to just sit here and read your notes and your diary...you have a way with words, it's beautiful. *hugs her* Be my dream catcher and I will be yours... |
| from deadblckrose : |
| I want to kill your parents. You are to precious to be hit.. way to precious. If I was there.. I would kick them.. hard. ♥ |
| from darkdaydream : |
| No, don't force a smile. Happiness isn't required for me. I can see through those beautiful eyes of yours, I can see all the torture. I can sit here and hold you if you want. Comfort you. I can be there for you. And you don't have to force that smile. -I took this from the same person's diary. I'm stupid I know. But I wanted to share it with you. Love ya Jackie!- |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I know your scared, and I know your hurting inside. It's all I can do to stop myself from reaching out to wipe the tears away from your eyes. I want to take your pain away, and throw it at the sun. I just want you to smile for me. Smile baby, smile. -I took that from someones diary. Take care- |
| from darkdaydream : |
| You are not a mistake Jackie. You have helped many of us diaryland readers. You have made me happy when my days were shit. Thank you! |
| from unworthypain : |
| Your not a mistake in my eyes, your a blessing. *smiles hugging her* Love ya Jackie, My pill...I wouldnt be alive without your words right now. Your my inspiration for living. g2g now, I'm not supposed to be online, parents are gonna ground me, bye bye! |
| from unworthypain : |
| *smiles* Me too... |
| from unworthypain : |
| *smiles hugging her* Your so precious...I can not write anything as poetic and beautiful as you did, but you seem to understand...You know what exactly I feel, how poetic it should be done. To me suicide is something artistic, I'm waiting for a perfect dramatic way to do it. I'm odd, but your my pill, my pill to ease the pain. My heart and soul are in pain, they are bleeding, but you...you make it all stop, you make me feel anything is possible. I hurt, you hurt, so many of us are in pathetic agony we never deserved. We are pills for each other, we will ease each others pain...I love you Jackie, I am so glad I met you. You make it all fall away, the pain, the depression, the numb emotions... |
| from ashes87 : |
| awww... i'm glad you're happy. and it's true-- you are a beautiful person. i hope you begin to feel better. :) |
| from unworthypain : |
| Thanks Jackie...I'm so pathetic, I couldnt even kill myself right. I didnt even die last night, damnit. I am so tired of freaking people..thanks for being here..it gives me hope =) Love ya, Lauren aka unworthypain |
| from brokenwings3 : |
| I absolutly adore your layout, and are those lyrics that go across the top of your diary from jack of jill? or did u change the wording.. anyway i love it, luv, mere |
| from beat-me : |
| if only that were true, i would be with you, to complete the turn... keep me alive, keep me wishing, keep me under ground |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Hiii! You're online right now but you're away. :( Can't wait for my notes that will have songs! Keeping me in suspense. Hopefully talk to you soon when you get back! |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Thank you for that last note that you gave me. That would be awesome if you came here! Haha. Talk to you soon hopefully! |
| from darkdaydream : |
| I'll miss you Jackie. Hopefully you can do some communicating. I miss talking to you everyday. Thank you for leaving me those notes. It relieved some worries. I'll try and leave you more notes. Take care. |
| from beat-me : |
| you almost made it, just deeper, i have never fainted from cutting, you are almost there, i wish that i could cut that deep, i wish, but, my wishes dont come true, but, i love you soooo much, and, if it all works as planned, then, come and comfort me at night, take me away, give me the power to die, to complete... i love you... kitti |
| from unworthypain : |
| I didn't know you that well. But you were cool, you got a lot of bullshit thrown at you that you didnt deserve. If you decide to go through with suicide..I really hope it's painless and you rest peacefully...you derserve that much. You were a good person and people treated you like crap, screw them. Just hopefully you can find some peace. |
| from beat-me : |
| haha, me, and happy??? barely ever happen, have a miricle, and, there, you have happy... kitti, i love you |
| from darkdaydream : |
| wahoO! Thank you for all of those notes! Made me laugh...hahaha. You left me stranded here online...by myself...oh well it's not your fault. It is your mothers fault...what a triscuit. Anyways..you are awesome! You are possibly my god also? Meahhh...later |
| from beat-me : |
| i love you girl |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Its time for your note! I've kept you in suspense for long enough...about 30mins. Muahahaha. Okay I'm a phsyco. You're cool! It's fun talking to you. I actually have someone that might care about me...? wahoO for Jackie! |
| from sharpsecret : |
| loved ur words.beautiful girl u are,saw ur pics n u have well sweet eyes awwwwwwwww cutting is a powerful addiction.takecare x |
| from darkdaydream : |
| Hey. Yea my diary is locked. I'm too paranoid to unlock it I guess. If you want to talk you can IM me....SweetRes182. I'll think about unlocking my diary. |
| from darkdaydream : |
| You don't know me but I've been reading your diary for a couple days now. Great story. Keep it going. I agree with unworthypain...it reminds me of the book "Cut". |
| from deadblckrose : |
| I can't wait to read the rest. I felt like it was happening to me. *claps* |
| from unworthypain : |
| Wow, what you have so far on your story is really good. I wish you would do a whole book on it heh. It really reminds me of "Cut", if you haven't read it, please do, it is really good. Your a really good writer, continue writing, I really loved what you have so far. Keep it up! |
| from unworthypain : |
| So, your going to go through with it? I am not sure if I should be congratulating you on your bravery or be sad, your pretty cool. You have one of the best diaries I've ever read. I think it would be a shame for you to end it all. We all get to the point that we KNOW its over, we will end it. Hopefully you won't go through with it, but no one can stop you but YOU. It's your choice, we all have our inner demons, should we or should we not? But sometimes those inner demons leave and it's all left up to you whether or not you will kill yourself. We have all the power to make something of our lives, once we are old enough to be out on our own, things will get better, they will...I know it. Maybe it's just wishful thinking but I want to live...for those who want me to. I will do it for them. Or maybe I live out of hope, hope life will get better...who knows, I just hope you don't leave this world so early. |
| from unworthypain : |
| Things get better when you get a car and money, or so I've been told lol. Well life naturally sucks, but we are still alive up to this point for some reason arent we? Hopefully we can all get through this hell and shove it in everyone's face that we are stronger then they will ever be! We can get through depression, suicide, and all the other torments life brings our way. |
| from beat-me : |
| i love you doll, and, they are not all that bad, i have been going to them since i was 7, more than half my life, and ive been on antidepressants for over three/four years...so, yea, they dont help, i dont think, i love you doll... kitti |
| from unworthypain : |
| Wow, I just came upon your diary...I have to see a therapist too b/c of depression and suicide, but I didn't ever get to take an IQ test or do an ink blot test, wish I could. I just really am screwed up and I wish someone could tell me why, cuz I sure as hell don't know. |
| from beat-me : |
| any time doll... kitti |
| from fangable : |
| no problem, if you ever need someone to talk to just drop me a note, ok? |
| from beat-me : |
| you can do it love, i believe in you.. kitti |
| from cdghost : |
| you are the last person ever to be sent off to pyscho hospital... but you are in a pyscho hospital (your family's house)..you need to leave |
| from fangable : |
| i just stumbled across your diary, i wish your parents realized you can't help it instead of yell at you. they shoudl support you. i am so sorry, i hope everything works out in the end. |
| from brainwashed3 : |
| i love you girl, my new diary, beat-me... for you... kitti |
| from brainwashed3 : |
| baby, you can stop, if i can fucking stop, you can, please, just try, if you have to cry during fourth, then ask to go up to the counsler, and talk with him or her, it helps, i leave third and fourth period and cry, and my teachers know where i am going, it a rutine, but, i give you best wishes, but please, no more at skool, kitti |
| from prettycorpse : |
| Welcome to the Damaged diaryring! Best wishes! <3 |
| from brainwashed3 : |
| sweetheart... dont worry, all will be well, just a week or two ago, i cut the fuck out of my hips too, with a razor too, you bleed sooo fucking much, and its not even funny, but, it feels sooo damned good, i cant do it for 22 more days... ((i was put on a bet, if i can not cut for a month, then i would be given 20$)) ... but i long for it... please try to stop baby face, i am here for you, you can tell me all... i am fucking here... i love you sooo much love |
| from brainwashed3 : |
| he he, i get to leave the first note!!! yay, hello there you... well, hi... night |
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