messages to jonathan29:
(click here to add new message):

from jonathan29 :
thegay: I am still around! Email me at jonathantx29@yahoo.com
from thegay :
Where the hell are you!?! Are you on Facebook?
from stepfordtart :
Meh. *sigh*. Onwards and upwards? I hope so, dear. ((squeeze)) s x
from urbancadence :
I missed you toooo!!!!! I'm sorry you fell off the wagon, but please please please please don't ever ever stop trying. That's the biggest difference between people who eventually recover completely and those who don't! Please please write more! The good, the bad, the ugly, everything - it's really therapeutic... and you'll always have a support system on here :) Thanks for the b'day wishes! WRITE MORE!! :)
from kimnsrv :
Hey, sunshine. Just checking on ya!
from urbancadence :
Well, I'M BACCCCK! :-D Glad to see that things are going well with you, based on your last entry!!!!! I've missed you!
from dragprincess :
hey my friend. i can't really offer any advice that you don't already know (and that i, with two months back from relapsing, can offer without sounding like a hypocrite), but you know the drill: make the meetings, reach out to the winners, hold tight to Paco the Love Taco and keep this as a reference point for just how bad it is out there. xoxox, Abby (dragprincessnyc.livejournal.com)
from stepfordtart :
Here's to Day 4 then. s x
from stepfordtart :
Aww man! What a shame. Well. What can I say? Draw a line under it and move on? REALLY hope you can - you're such fun when you're on form. ((gives you a squeeze)) s x
from jaye8 :
You know you really have to want to stop for yourself and no one else. Thinking of you, wishing you all the best and sending along prayers. What more can I do, babe? You have to do the really hard part but I'm willing to stand by you if you are willing to commit to the work and stick to it. xoxo, J
from stepfordtart :
Likewise, dude. you Ok? s x
from al-seedus :
When you don't update for a while, I wonder if you've fallen off the wagon. Please say it ain't so:(
from urbancadence :
Hahahahaha that's hilarious!!!!
from stepfordtart :
I BEG you not to let Paco the Poo Taco lick your face! I snorted with glee at first reading of that story but now, in the cold light of five minutes later, Im suddering with ickyness. s x
from stepfordtart :
Why? Why does it say blue balls on the pavement? Whats that about? Oh, and *waggles eyebrows* on the other stuff! s x
from stepfordtart :
As someone who spent most of last summer digging up old concrete and laying new (part of our building project), I think thats a pretty good idea, actually. Just make sure you leave a handprint in the new stuff before it sets, and make it one you can look back on proudly and say "Look at THAT! I did that!". s x PS Dog poo in a pet store? I cant help thinking there's some kind of divine retribution thing going on in Paco's mind there!
from stepfordtart :
You still look gorgeous tho, fatso! s x
from stepfordtart :
Confetti shooting out of ANYONE's ass would be SO cool, tho, wouldnt it! I think you'd need to be lying face down for it to have a real impact - like a big ole buttfetti fountain! I need to get out more. s x
from stepfordtart :
'eyebows'? Read the fucking thing before you click 'done' willya, woman! *shakes head at self*.
from stepfordtart :
You handsome devil! I was expecting an altogether more weedy looking specimen. That sounds shockingly rude....but I was! Cute dawgie, cute you. ROWR! (and other inappropriate noises!) s x PS L luuuurved the Epsom bath....I did too but then I WAS in the tub with him *waggles eyebows*
from stepfordtart :
Having ones head up an ass of any description is always gonna be a depressing experience. When you have finished rinsing the poo out of your hair, Id suggest you take all that extra 'stuff' you've got from the ex and find new ways to use it - move that picture, dye that linen to a shade you like blah blah blah. 'Paco the Love Taco'? *raising one eyebrow but letting you get away with it cos its you*. s x
from stepfordtart :
I didnt laugh. I SWEAR! That coffee shooting out of my nose was just a kind of funny sneeze. It definitely WASN'T a great big snorty laugh. *snigger* s x
from urbancadence :
That pussy, he just couldn't keep up with my enormous sexual appetite... ;-P If only his record sales were as good as his looks!
from urbancadence :
Hahaha!!! I'm throwing mental berets for you too!! That's hilarious... but then again, you have always been a funny guy (in a great way) :-)
from urbancadence :
HAHA! But seriously though, if you ever need a vacation to get away from you-know-what and everything and anything, you got a place to visit in sunny Los Angeles. I'm serious!!! Come spend a few days with sunshine and fake surf - we don't guarantee much, but sunshine *is* what we got PLENTY of!!!!!! :-) (And yea - you can knit all you want over here! :-P)
from urbancadence :
Uhhhh.... see, while you were away, California got cool... and long story short, Jakey G. and I got what you call "married" ;-). But it's okay, we're open to "guest stars" every now and then, and since I've known you for years, I'm sure Jakey would be alright with just one night! ;-P
from urbancadence :
YOU'RE BACK!!!! YAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! I've missed you!!!!!!!!!! I'm so sorry about CP... but you know what? Another day, another clean slate, onward and upward. Take some time to mourn the relationship, and I hope to never hear of another relationship of yours ending this way again. Keep on knitting! :) But YAYYY, welcome back!!!!!
from hanknbg :
you are NOT self destructing...I will not allow it. Talk to me baby
from urbancadence :
I don't think your boobies will quite make the cut for Girls Gone Wild ;-) You're more the drunken jello wrestling type! Hahaha!!
from urbancadence :
Man, I am AWESOME! :D
from urbancadence :
And it's so good to see you back on here again! Stick around, won't ya? Sounds like you're doing a lot better than you have in a while. Good for you!! You following American Idol this season? ;) (And btw, Blake is still my boyfriend. Try not to be too jealous.)
from stepfordtart :
Hey Jonathan. Just been lurking in your archives and thought I'd better stop by and say Hi, in case you thought you had a freaky stalker. Have a good day. s x
from hanknbg :
Hey there Tex...I haven't been here in forever and was thrilled to see you had just posted. I am alive and well. I hope you are doing well. Come on over to Ohio...I'll give you that hug!
from dragprincess :
Welcome back to the clean life.
from urbancadence :
Yeah, it's great that I found out about Chris early, before I'd invested more of myself into the whole thing. Still, it bites. Grrrrr. Why do I fall so easily?!!?
from urbancadence :
Nooooo!!! Come back! D*land will get its act together soon! I can't post lewd notes for you at Blogger 'cos I don't have a Blogger account!!
from shinythings- :
omgggg! me too! hehe, i was totally going to message you about this if it went on for too much longer. diaryland needs to start working asap. after all, i need to whine to somebody about my life. ;)
from urbancadence :
He was never yours, my friend ;) Hahaha!!! Wasn't he awesome tonight though? Mine mine mine!!! =P~
from urbancadence :
Nathan Petrelli totally does it for me. Mmmmm....
from shinythings- :
You're so creepy. ;)
from shinythings- :
ex-boyfriends are crack. *sigh*
from urbancadence :
Oh, how nice! My boyfriend Jake Gyllenhaal and I would also like to wish you a great weekend too. And btw, tell Blake that he left his watch on my nightstand on Thursday night, will ya? At least, I think it's his... could have been Chris' too ;) MWA-HA-HA-HA-HAHHH!!!! >:)
from urbancadence :
P/S. Thanks for the birthday wish, I really appreciate it!! ;) But still... BLAKE IS MINE!!!!!!
from urbancadence :
Hands off, bitch! Blake is MINE!!!! :-P
from soberjourney :
Thanks for the note!
from haloaskew :
Good luck with the move! I know the pain, I know the agony. And the excitement! *WHEE*!
from haloaskew :
Love the object d'art! And oh, when my mom first used a computer mouse (1996), she picked it up, pointed it at the monitor and clicked it like a remote for the TV. HA!
from urbancadence :
Hahahahaha!!! 3 times a day?? Wow, you STUD! ;D
from shinythings- :
hehe, thanks! and congrats on the new place! how exciting! :)
from dvlsh1 :
i only do 3 na meetings a week, part of it is i have 2 meetings that I totally dont like.. no unity what-so-ever and the other part is that is all I have time for. you can have a meeting with 2 ppl so you can be on the phone with somone and having a meeting =) have a good weekend
from bookafly :
Hey! Thanks for adding me as a fave!!! I've just been reading your archives from this year and you seem like such a great and fun person. Not unlike myself ;) I love that you're writing what you're grateful for and I must say that watching the Secret really did change the way I approach things. I'm gonna try to re-size a pic of my tat tonight - yours look great! Oh and just so you know....I thought that the site was called dairyland for the first while (really, I'm smarter than that...) and one day I just went, oh! DIARYland. That makes soooo much more sense!!
from urbancadence :
Congrats on the apartment!!!! Yaaayyyy one source of pressure is off! Next stop: MOVING! Yikes!! ;-)
from dvlsh1 :
thanks for the note always nice to meet folks in recovery =) I know the feeling I wish I could crave salads and fruits rather then junk food. have a good day
from urbancadence :
Thanks for your note! Like what you always write: Lemons/Lemonade, right? :) As for the loneliness, I think I know what you're talking about. I think to get rid of that, you need to surround yourself with friends, not just people... but in my honest opinion, nothing can eliminate it as well as... y'know, the 9-letter b-word. I know that it's the furthest thing away from your mind right now, so in the meantime... we'll just have to do what we can. Perhaps pursue a new hobby that involves friends (knitting does not!)... go out to the movies more, or learn some new sport or something. Surround yourself with people who care about you, so that you'll be entertained and distracted, which would give you less time to let the dreaded loneliness seep in. Just a suggestion that sounds logical in theory. I battle loneliness all the time these days, and not having enough friends is my problem. At least you appear to be surrounded by plenty of people who love and support you... which is wonderful. But hang in there - you've conquered your addictions successfully which takes incredible strength, so I don't see why you'll have any trouble with this issue. Just don't leave D-land again, okay? :)
from urbancadence :
Thanks for your note!! It's so great to see you posting regularly on here again!!! As for being single, I guess it's just a matter of momentum for me right now. I was in a relationship for over 3 years, and all of a sudden, the bike I was riding on has vanished, and I've fallen flat on the pavement and tumbling down the hill. Guess being single needs some getting used to, like anything else. Why does everything require time? It's not like we have plenty of it in the first place!!
from shinythings- :
I KNOW! Get this. Steve and I made up. Tonight I go to his house. His brother, who is in town visiting, is mad at me b/c I fought with his brother and WE ended up in a fight tonight. WTF?!
from dragprincess :
Relapsed...AGAIN. So not good.
from shinythings- :
hehe, thanks! she makes my heart smile, too. :)
from urbancadence :
Happy birthday!!!!!!! It's a milestone - you should definitely feel proud and treat yourself today. As for the guy, try not to think "relationship" right away, 'cos there's plenty of other directions it can go, such as "really good friend", so you never know... it's just too early. Just enjoy the company, get to know each other, and see where it takes you. You never have to do anything that you don't feel comfortable with, so revel in that safety. Have fun, and good luck! Happy birthday again!!!
from urbancadence :
Thanks for your note! And yes, I am quite a bit younger that you *wink wink* Hahaha!! As for the dating pool, I figured that just because I'm going out with someone doesn't mean we're gonna end up married or something. What happened to a little old fashioned "let's get to know each other"? And you're right - what's to say that you'll like him or vice-versa after having one dinner together? I think it's wise to just live in the moment and stop asking yourself "where is this going?", because things rarely go where we expect them to go anyway. I expected to live happily ever after with my ex, and look how that turned to crap. Some things are just beyond your control, but that doesn't mean you should be too scared to venture out of your safety zone. Getting to know someone does not imply commitment (if it does, then the guy you're going out with is a lunatic). Just living in the moment is what I think you should do. Take it a day at a time. Things will seem a whole lot less intimidating. Good luck! :)
from dragprincess :
AND we both obviously feel Madonna's Ray of Light is total recovery. We are connected!
from haloaskew :
Hey, I think I might know what's wrong with the comments link. Looks like you have the words DOUBLEPERCENT in the JavaScript instead of %20. For reference, check out KungFuKitten's (kungfukitten.diaryland.com) Haloscan JS for her latest entry "Gah gah gah." Here's a snip of the code (I right clicked on the comments link to view Properties): javascript:HaloScan('Gah%20gah%20gah.');
from haloaskew :
Booberry! Are you still living in Houston? I've only had a chance to read about 20 or so of your 2002 archives so far, so not sure if you moved between now and then. So funny we have the Houston connection though (I live in Lexington, KY now, but I've been in Houston with mom for the past month. I was a Houstonian for 30+ years!) And bunny, do you know your latest 3 comments are showing up on every one of your old entries? It looks like maybe a few links need to be fixed (the ol' "switcheroo paddie configuration," in cat speak). And one more thing: I told my mom 'bout ya and was reading little snippets from your archives to her today. She just loves you. "Oh, that Jonathan. What a sweetie!" she said. :)
from sippiambrose :
Hey Doll!
from urbancadence :
What a pleasant surprise to see your return! Welcome back!!! :)
from lvrebelman :
I am glad the meetings are going well. Funny, I went out on a couple of dates with a Michael not too long ago, he never called me either. I wish you the best.
from mackaj :
omg, where did the pic of me in my boxers show up now..... i thought i'd removed all traces :)
from staceykp :
I really don't think there should be 'issues' in the first month, mainly because I agree, both of you should be at your best at the moment. You seem to be yourself and he doesn't seem to be responding. Why don't you maybe leave him alone for awhile? Realistically, there's someone out there who you will have an easier time with. Relationships are hard, but they shouldn't be hard in the first month, ever. K
from mackaj :
Hey there, thanks for the note. Just don't update as frequently these days..... not much exciting goes on these days anyway. Cya round sometime :)
from djc360 :
my worthless two cents: i think, inevitably, relationships sooner or later require some effort once the chemical high wears off a bit -- effort on the parts of TWO people though. some poeple just don't know that though, or they're caught up in their precious little illusions, so it's good to remind one self and one another that they take work and patience (though not ENDLESS amounts of patience, obviously). i tend to think there's something fishy about relationships that require no work whatsoever, not that i've seen much of those. although another strategy, besides workinga t it, is to ignore whatever the problem si -- that only works for some things though, i think, but it's probably a better strategy SOMEtimes. (p.s. i think you used your parentheses right. good job!!!)
from osakamoment :
I typed in "Www9wyDe3eade" just for fun and it brought me right back to your journal.
from ryan8-5cut :
Jonathan, A)Get the internet out of your house. You are just as addicted to it as you are anything. Also, never go back to gay.com or especially manhunt.com B)STOP dating. Admit you are NOT strong enough to emotionally deal with a relationship. You tried it the last time and as sson as it ended you went right back to using. You expect someone to save you from yourself...it's your responsibility. C)Go to private therapy. Group therapy is to social for you and does not work. You need one on one attention to get to the root of your dependency on men, drugs, alchohol, the net. D)You are not stupid Jonathan, you know exactly what you are doing at all times. You know what's bad and you know what's good for you. You are the king of compromising with yourself. You also make decisions based on others reactions instead of your own set of rules. This usually ends in a bad choice and probably stems from when you were a kid. Start saying, "I don't do drugs" and you'll stop doing them. Erase the past. ove forward. Time for some tough love. -Ryan
from urbancadence :
Nooo, don't disclose it right off! At least, I personally don't think you should. This is a personal thing, and you don't go all personal on a first date. It's more of a 3rd date thing. Get him interested in you first. You can't play your cards right unless you actually GET the cards first. Just my two-cents.
from djc360 :
good luck
from lvrebelman :
mmm....RandyBlue.... *slobbers*
from lvrebelman :
Porn machine, eh? I have so much of it now, and yes, I am willing to share. :-)
from cantilever :
Nope, none of these things seem to have been your fault. The one thing that occurs to me is that you are sober, and so more connected to your emotions and intellect than you were when you weren't. In other words, shit that might have rolled off you is now properly getting on your nerves. Mother Teresa would have clocked the sister for the wallet crack.
from lvrebelman :
You last entry has left me wondering if I should have a hot fling myself, as it's really hard for me to find someone to have a relationship with. It seems a lot easier as even someone of my build(?) can get some if necessary.
from djraindog :
Hey, hunnybunchesofoats. I wasn't gonna say anything about this one, but dude, you TOTALLY deserve better men than the ones you seem to end up dating. I think you need to learn to be more of a bitch and make it clear that you're not gonna put up with any shit. ;-) In the meantime, I send you a virtual hug and congratulate you on your continuing sobriety, and encourage you to explore yourself and your spirituality, as you were thinking of doing. Be careful, though, of listening too much to anyone in particular other than yourself. (Here again is where I love my dear Anglican church -- the ones who don't mind the 'mos, mind you, not the ones who split off.) All my best...
from urbancadence :
What funny stories!! Are you sure he doesn't have ADHD? :)
from lvrebelman :
Wow, it's nice to see that you're still alive. No, really, I was worried after one day out of the blue you had your diary locked. I checked today on a whim and bam! You're back. I'm glad. Well, if you ever want to chat again, I'm still on AIM, same screen name (OG14300). Hmm... I have some catch up reading to do. :-D -Oscar
from djc360 :
i'm really really glad you're getting better
from djc360 :
i hope you will find a way out and be safe.
from urbancadence :
Gawd those hurricane reports on TV are just frightful. I really hope it won't be nearly as bad as New Orleans. Houston isn't subject to flooding due to levees, so it shouldn't be. Hopefully it's just the media over-reacting after a major disaster like they usually do, and everything will be alright. I know the freeways are a standstill, but do try getting out of town still! Slowly but steadily? Keep heading north or west or northwest, whichever direction the least people are heading! TAKE CARE!!
from kararific1 :
hehe your barbie story is wonderful. <3
from staceykp :
welcome back! I kind of gave up for well, a very long time, to try and read you, and thought i'd try today. Nice to read you :) Stacey PS - my diary moved... if you care :) the new site is listed on this one
from al-seedus :
hey... ive been reading your diary for two years now. i'd like to keep doing so because i enjoy reading, but your diary is locked and i dont have a password. hopefully, youll pass it onto me. alseedus@hotmail.com
from mammas-pills :
It's never too late to turn the ship... Take it from one who knows. 1st thing first no more meth. The only way back to sanity is to stop using, eat and sleep. And maybe sleep a bit more. If you can save your job, do so, but living out our time there continuing to make up the AIDS story might be a bit much. So start over or come clean. You're causing yourself to tumble, perhaps seemingly out of control...but that is an illusion as is a lot of the thoughts going through your head, probably. If you had it in you to propel youself this far, you can switch gears and go back up. It's not going to be easy. Find a crutch, a friend, someone in the family. You're not alone, despite what you tell yourself. Good luck, mister. You can make it through this.
from peteypuke :
jonthan, honey, email me: peteypuke @ yahoo.com seriously. i'm here to listen if you need me. no judgement. and if there's anything i can do to help you turn this around just say the word. trust that i understand completely
from k9642042 :
I actually kind of think ted is the hot one.
from hanknbg :
You'll always be my Justin ;)
from peteypuke :
welcome the FUCK back. and who called you Ted? Emett maybe but not Ted. I guess just be thankful they didn't say "Deb". However, in regards to the America's Funniest Home Videos- you should feel DEEP SHAME on that note. But I love ya anyway.
from bettyalready :
To catch a thief. The ex lax brownies was pure genius.
from kimnsrv :
If only you had made some LSD or mushroom-laden pizza. That would be FUN to watch. Hopefully your boos is the thief. Or that bitch that hung up on you last week!
from lvrebelman :
Only you would think of something devious like that, I wuv you! May he or she spend the day in agony, clutching the bathroom stall partitions.
from peteypuke :
i'm drunk. also fuck seth and fuck all those bitches. people who spread that sort of rumor are ASKING FOR IT for you know what i mean.
from hanknbg :
I would have spilled the beans...due to the health concerns. Now spill the beans about your weekend...
from doghigh :
I've learned, from past experience, never to volunteer information like this (not necessarily sexual info but personal info in general). I will only consider divulging details if I think there is immediate danger or I am asked specifically about the situation. Otherwise it is a recipe for disaster.
from staceykp :
In an example like that, better to tell the truth, since it does directly affect your friend. Sometimes, it's cruel to be kind. PS, talk about drama! And I only thought girls generated that kind of stuff!
from djc360 :
of course. the truth is the truth is the truth. if you didn't say it, then if something happens, they'll blame you for not saying anything. the world is so much simpler when we just go for the facts, and leave the bs at home.
from hanknbg :
Houston is waaaaaaay more fun than Toledo.
from staceykp :
As long as you are safe, do what you want! I think if you decided that this is the lifestyle you want, long term, then maybe you should worry, but for now, enjoy.
from djc360 :
hot
from mackaj :
just dropping you a note from the lower regions of australia, love reading your diary mate.....
from djraindog :
Quick thoughts on things that are none of my New York bithnith...Jerrod: Does it occur that something major might've happened in his life, and he just hasn't had time? (especially if he's usually on the internet and he hasn't been lately). Job: If the positions for which you want to be considered are effectively promotions and you're actually qualified for them, but your boss is just saying, "No, I won't let you apply for that because I want to keep you here under my thumb," you MUST either a) go around/above said boss, or b) search (secretly or not) for greener pastures where there are actually opportunities for you to advance/learn/grow (and CARRY THROUGH). IMNSHO, you let people walk all over you WAY too much, son. I mean, you're a TOP, right? So go fuckin' BE one! ;-)
from buddhababy :
Regarding your question about why hotties hookup with non-hotties... I think some people connect for other reasons beyond asthetic looks.
from buddhababy :
I always call whenever I want to, and don't observe any "dating" rules... perhaps thats why i suck at dating.
from losergeek :
"And why is it that the tall skinny guys are the ones with a dick like a fucking kickstand?" I don't know, but it's true.
from bettyalready :
I don't know what it is about the kickstand-dick thing. but it is very true. I miss those skinny dudes.
from lvrebelman :
Oh, that is soooooooo cute! Sounds like Justin and me, actually. Dorky love rocks!
from ozwald :
Oh my lord I'm so happy for you. I have a hard on at my desk just reading it. What is it about having a man unload on your chest? I just love it. Luckily so does the good kisser. Yay for you!
from djraindog :
There're usually a few other characteristics to look for if ya wanna find one of the big boys...Tall is good, skinny is generally a good indicator...also check sizes of feet, hands, nose, and ears...and then check the ass...It seems to me that boys without much ass have got SERIOUS action goin' on in front. ;-)
from bettyalready :
Grandma chic...I somehow doubt it's like that...your place sounds cool.
from staceykp :
I was kind of curious on what you thought the outcome would be. A majority of canadians were hoping for Kerry, as his morals are closer to ours, the only good thing about Bush is that he likes to outsource all US jobs (which isn't good for your economy, but rocks for ours). I wish Kerry won, he's normal.
from peteypuke :
good luck tonight. make sure you make soem time to VOTE in before all the hot, face-raping action.
from staceykp :
by the sounds of it, I need to turn myself into a gay man, I might get laid more :)
from kimnsrv :
Going through a breakup too. Any advice?
from ohio21boy :
oh man, I hate all the ribbons, too! A friend and I decided that we should start wearing black ribbons to show that we hate ribbons...
from hanknbg :
I almost wrote an entry about those stupid fucking ribbons too!
from urbancadence :
"Iota": The ninth letter of the Greek alphabet, corresponding to the letter "i" in English. It's used to express something that's very little in quantity, because that's the alphabet that requires the least amount of ink to print. (Gawd, I'm so sad that I actually know this crap, aren't I?)
from djraindog :
I'm not exactly one to judge on "doing things [you] shouldn't". On the other hand, anybody who does crystal, coke, GHB, or any other "designer" drug is disqualified from the race for my attentions. Wasteoids would waste my valuable time. (I don't like fucking them, either, as they usually have the all the focus of hyperactive puppies.) I think it's pretty noble of you to have C over for dinner at all. Given the way he ended things, I'd have kicked his ass out much sooner and completely cut off contact. I just don't stand for bullshit from ANYone.
from djraindog :
Tee-hee...Well, I mean, seriously, if that guy thought he was gonna meet Prince Charming and ride off into the sunset at a sex party?! Really. (Though I have made some friends that way...) Oh, and I'm totally with staceykp on Carlos's dinner; if you leave your sugar-daddy, you lose the benefits. I'm still unclear on precisely what he CONTRIBUTED to that relationship; if not for the occasional mention of sex, the reader might have believed Carlos was a 3-year-old you'd taken to raise.
from staceykp :
totally! get all dressed up then maybe make sure you HAVE to go out somewhere, just for an hour :) tee hee
from staceykp :
I'm surprised you're letting carlos over... well, i guess it's the nice thing to do eh? My suggestion, a nice bowl of kraft dinner :) it's hot, it's satisfying and you don't have to go out of your way to make it.
from lvrebelman :
lol, I love winter: I get to break out my really nice clothes. :-)
from djraindog :
You know, I really hate that whole phenomenon; it's stupid and it's gutless and it's a good chunk of the reason why I can't stand a lot of gay guys. Most fags need to fucking grow a spine and the balls to say what they think. Sport-fucking is sport-fucking, and if people can't live with it, they shouldn't do it.
from djc360 :
maybe they're reading your diary
from eroswanker :
Juan? Don't you mean "Carlos"?
from tmb :
Let's hear all the salacious details - preferably with photos!
from al-seedus :
i saw a Wonder Woman toilet seat cover for sale online... and thought of you.
from lvrebelman :
*sigh* I'm a closeted Colton Ford fan, I like both of the things he does for a living... *ashamed as hell*
from djc360 :
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... have you been reading debbie ford??
from hoochiepoet :
having gone through both, unrequited is definitely worse.
from staceykp :
Better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all.
from peteypuke :
it is totally available on DVD. I think Chris nought it @ Best Buy, actually. Ever hear of the band called, "The Voloptuos Horror of Karen Black"?
from djc360 :
*squeeze*
from peteypuke :
dude fuck him. FORGET HIM. When one one door closes another inevitably opens. it will suck for a while but it will be worth it. there are better things (and boys) in store for you.
from k9642042 :
Hmm..maybe for the commute you should get yourself an ipod or something and plug it in your ears and just zone out for the drive?
from buddhababy :
damn. i forgot to watch ManHunt. I was too busy getting stone with a boy.
from djc360 :
OWN your loserness!!!
from peteypuke :
Dude, In the last commercial I saw for Battle of The Sexes, They totally show Nick and Shane dry-humping each other on the dancefloor. KEEP THE FAITH! we all have some hot man-on-man action this season!
from peteypuke :
i am laughing my ass off @ "Gordon Gartrell". My best friend totally busts that out whenever I am wearing any sort of questionable fashion. Too funny.
from staceykp :
I cannot believe that Carlos is still there! I mean, wouldn't it be more comfy for him if he left too? Lame. Did you see the presidential debates? Bush made a complete ass of himself, and I found it quite amusing seeing as I, like yourself, am a Bush hater. I'm also Canadian, so maybe the two go together? that's what I've heard! Hopefully the bastard loses, he didn't even win in the first place!
from peteypuke :
It so HAS TO BE a dead body in the pool. this is going to be SOOO "Who Killed Laura Palmer" - I can't even stand it.
from lvrebelman :
gag-inducing ceiling aside, I'm glad you had fun. :-)
from peteypuke :
HOLY CRAP! A new season of "America's Next Top Model" starts tomorrow!!! <insert high pitched bitch giggling here>
from fergie :
you know hon, from reading your journal, it didn't seem like you really enjoyed being with your boyfriend. I'm sure there's another side to the story, but it doesn't seem like much of a loss. Don't be afraid to stand on your own two feet.
from tmb :
I though LAX was great, since I am a big Heather Locklear fan, too. And if I were you, I would give serious thought to just kicking Carlos's ass out.
from eroswanker :
I agree that you're handling everything really well. I also recently broke up with my boyfriend, so I feel your pain. Incidentally, I think chewing gum stimulates your saliva glands or something and actually makes you hungrier, so maybe that's not the route to go. Good luck with that and everything, though!
from peteypuke :
you're handling this pretty well and i am quite proud of you! still, i'm here for you if you ever need to freak out, rant, or just want someone else's perspective. take care.
from hanknbg :
Panera is one of those places that is good the first 200 times you eat there....then suddenly you realize.. "this food is shit!"
from staceykp :
Aw! I'm so sorry to hear that! Breakups are always hard, but at least he talked to you to your face. My ex, told me over the phone while I was in a different country visiting my parents. ouch.
from davemarr :
Hope you have a peaceful breakup. Drama sucks.
from djc360 :
*supa-hugz*
from k9642042 :
that totally sucks.
from djraindog :
Hang in there and don't beat yourself up. I only know what you choose to write, but I'd say he's easily responsible for as much, if not more, bullshit, and I'd always rather hoped you'd leave him. In any case, I'm quite sure that on your own, you'll find your feet and discover that they're quite strong enough to hold you up without the weight of someone else on your back. All best, as ever...
from sleepy-gurl :
I'm sorry to hear that. :hugs:
from bettyalready :
Fuck. And yes, that's all I can think to say. totally harsh
from girlwcurls :
*hugs* feel better, okay?
from bettyalready :
jesus, chinese take-out sounds fucking great.
from davemarr :
Hope you get sober and happy. Having to lie about yourself is not good path to be on... but I'm sure you'll find lots of love and support in changing this. oxo.
from djraindog :
Hey, J-two-the-Nizzle--Is that Jeremy Jordan the pop star or the porn star? Hey, and good luck with the drinking thing; it's a thin line, but it's also a slippery slope. I think you'll be ok, but I can only analyse my own alcohol consumption, not that of others. All best...
from sleepy-gurl :
I'm glad you're trying to get help. Sounds odd but that's how I feel about eating - I need some kind of help. I just don't know where to get it. Anyway, did you know the Latino on the Real World used to be on that show Ghostwriter? Ummm it used to air on PBS and I used to be a huge fan, I thought he was so effin' hot. I can't wait either!
from mammas-pills :
Glad you are feeling better :) I know what's it's like where you are...all I can say is hang in there...ugh did I just say that? I always picture that silly card with the kitten hangin' on a tree limb, "Hang in there..." Anyway...I too am watching the Surreal Life...it's good albeit a tad uncomfortable. These are real people?? I love Charo, too...how could you not. Take care, mister...Jason aka mammas-pills
from staceykp :
Hi, The first thing you have to do is tell Carlos. If you really love him and trust him, he wil help you through this! Admitting a problem is the first step to getting better... really.
from retaliashun :
*hugs* hang in there kiddo. i've been through my phases over the years debating if i have an alochol problem, or am i feeling guilty for drinking, or am i binge drinker. if you seriously think you have a problem, i would suggest therapy first, before trying AA or the pills that make you physically sick when you drink
from k9642042 :
There is always AA. Seriously.
from al-seedus :
i guess theres a pill/medication for alcoholics that makes you absolutely sick if you drink any alcohol. i heard about it from another diaryland member ("sundry") and im sure she would answer any questions about it if you were to ask. she is taking it herself.
from mammas-pills :
tease me like mad?? why? take care, mister.
from pocket-pool :
When I decided to lock my diary due to excessive bullshit hate mail and such, I sent an email to everyone who had put me on their fav list giving username and password. Most don't seem to have gotten the mail, so here I am cluttering your notes page. The words you need are "stone" and "wall", without the quote marks of course. xoxox
from pocket-pool :
I love your new template! (Whatever happened to Linda Carter?!)
from doghigh :
I LOVED Charla and Mirna!!! I was totally depressed to see them go. I usually don't watch this type of tv but my other half got me hooked on it...can't get enough. the shit is like a crack rock. I fucking hate that Colin and his prissy woman not too mention the two Jesus freaks...whoa...am I on a 'reality tv' rant???? What is UP with me??
from hanknbg :
I don't know who Jeremy Jordan is. I'm not cool.
from raptorjeff :
OMG... I'm happy you wrote about your sex stories. I thought that kinda crazy stuff only happened to me. WD-40 isn't good for lube either.....
from tmb :
I was starting to worry about you since you don't usually go so long without posting; I'm glad it's just that you haven't been inspired. I'm up to three long-term medications that I get from my insurance's mail-order service. It works like a charm, and it's cheaper that way, too.
from retaliashun :
try the other david sedaris books. they are hilarious. me talk pretty someday, naked, barrel fever, and of course dress your kids in corduroy and denim
from hamiltonian :
saw your journal and I like it.. well done
from oicur12 :
I cannot type. Sorry. ;)
from oicur12 :
Hava e Romy and Micheele Day! One of my faves too -- and I love Erasure as well. Bonus points! ;) Take care ~ J
from djc360 :
i had a pretty miserable time in junior high too. i try not to think about it, but i'm sure a lot of my self-destructive habits and thoughts are from that time in my life. why can't people just get over things? why do things get stuck in our heads? in our lives? ugh.
from djc360 :
you're way too funny.
from k9642042 :
I drive 45 minutes each way everyday. I just try to think of it as "me" time.
from kstyle :
oh snow crash is really good, yeah. right now i'm re-reading "the mezzanine" by nicholson baker, do you know him? i can't explain this book, but...it's great!
from hanknbg :
The new Sedaris...I'm re-reading Stephen King's Dark Tower series..but I looooved "She's Come Undone." The chillow is in the mail....
from losergeek :
my favourite book is anything by Neal Stephenson, but especially "Snow Crash." His style is sort of like punk rock scifi. Good stuff. :)
from ohio21boy :
the new David Sedaris book is really really good.
from girlwcurls :
my favorite book is tuesdays with morrie by mitch albom.
from ohio21boy :
yeah, last time I was in Chicago, Oz and I played phone tag the whole weekend. I'm sure he'll have the welcome wagon ready for me when I move there...
from djc360 :
i think i read somewhere that drugs alone cannot "cure" ocd, and that the drugs have no effect on the ocd symptoms 30% of the times anyways. i used to have what you can call "moderate to severe" ocd, but life was pretty crappy then and the symptoms gradually went away as my life circumstances improved. i'm a strong believer that we live in a culture of the "quick-fix" -- and that most of the time, drugs (prozac, ritalin, etc.) only fix the superficial neurological stuff, but the underlying social/environmental circumstances that cause those problems in the first place remain ignored/invisible/unaddressed in society today. for example, depression is much more prevalent amongst the lower classes and those who live in poverty. hmmmm.... i wonder why? oh well, let's just give them a pill and keep them working 70 hours a week at their minimum wage jobs!!! they can be happy robots!!! okay, i'm just being cynical there, but you get my drift. it's as if we treat people like machines. i think the most practical option (not the best, but most practical) we have today is a drug regimen combined with psyhotherapy. but there are other opinions about thsi kinda thing, obviously.
from hanknbg :
Holy shit! A chillow is $30?
from lvrebelman :
Oh, God. What am I going to do about this erection you gave me at work with your last entry??? Oh well, I could use some excitement, I guess. :-D
from djraindog :
Ok, was just the massive filters on my work computer (POS PC) so NOTHING I don't want can get NEAR my hard drive. Me likey. Linda Carter may still be one of the most beautiful women on the planet. I used to spin around a lot, too, 'cause I liked being dizzy (explains a lot, now, doesn't it?). Your parents knew you were playing Wonder Woman & didn't get that you were a flaming pansy, though? Hmm...Now, about the hot frat boy getting fat...Bitter much? :-P
from djc360 :
you are hilarious. and may i remind you that england is also in iraq right now? i suggest you move here to canada. just pack a parka or two. and leave that chillow behind, you probably won't need it
from babygirlbaby :
Hi, my name is Danielle. I've just joined upto Diaryland n was wonderin around on the site n fell across your Diary. Just wanted to say Hi really. Chin up. Danielle xx
from djraindog :
Has my computer just decided to hate your diary, or is it really all white and blank?
from djc360 :
you have the best fuckin stories in the whole wide world
from djc360 :
hahaha! if only we could all skip childhood, the world would be a better place.
from tmb :
Awww, *I* like you! But seriously, I understand what you mean about feeling that everyone should like you and spending time trying to figure out why some people don't. It's hard for me to let that go, too.
from pocket-pool :
you don't "let" it get to you, it just gets to you. i understand. i'm another one. it's your nature. it kind of sucks, but it's better than being a totally self-centered, insensitive asshole. know any of those guys? thought so.
from urbancadence :
Glad you hate Adam Sandler and Tom Green as well! Whatever possessed Drew Barrymore to date Tom Green, we'll never know. But I guess it's indicative that she's got a lame sense of humor and will laugh at just about anything.
from ozwald :
Those evil hospitals and staff infucktions. I swear. That's horrible. I hope you kicked some nurse ass.
from djc360 :
i don't like needles either. i almost fainted the last time i got one jabbed into my arm... but taht could have been because i hadn't eaten for the past 24 hours... and spiders. i don't like spiders. and somehow, admitting that to myself makes it the fear worst.
from tmb :
Suntan panty hose???
from k9642042 :
Needles. They terrify me. I have trouble even using a hypodermic at work.
from davemarr :
I'm afraid of being in motor vehicle accidents where I am injured or killed. And afraid of heights... they give me vertigo.
from djraindog :
First off, sorry to hear about the family stuff. Hope things get better. Second, Jon & Dave...R u sure they're saying awful things about you? They might just be puzzled still...Yikes, I'm giving people the benefit of the doubt. Unthinkable.
from tmb :
I'm sorry to hear about your father and your cat. Thinking of you...
from ozwald :
OMG kid - so sorry to hear things aren't going so well right now. They will get better.
from kimnsrv :
I used to have beeper paranoia. Have you seen the little protective cable things you can buy to doubley secure them to your pants? They come in boring black and tacky gold and silver. I realized that the $30 I would have to pay for a replacement was a cmall price to pay to not look like a cheeseball.
from faux-homo :
Don't you and carlos ever have like crazy hot sex that you would like to write about..u always just "go to bed"
from k9642042 :
Oh man, going on and off meds is tricky. Don't be discouraged if you have to try other meds. It's rare that the first one you try works for you. On a lighter note, I am so thankful that my mom doesn't refer to a massager as a vibrator in mixed company.
from djc360 :
that's SO funny
from lvrebelman :
Well, my friend Keira and I like to masticate at Jack in the Box. But again, I like to masticate at home, at the table or sometimes even in bed, if I'm in the mood. Seriously, I hope your mother doesn't have that in her vocabulary, for her own sake (and not to mention yours, cutie). :-)
from ozwald :
OMG kid - I'm laughing so hard right now.
from djc360 :
have you read "the kid" by Dan Savage? yes, that's dan savage the advice columinst. the book's a real life story about a gay couple's attempt to adopt a child. it is HILARIOUS. and poignant. and it brought tears to my eyes. GREAT book. highly recommended.
from hanknbg :
I think like that all the time. J Lo=fruitcake
from mammas-pills :
Hey, Not sure if you still read me, or not, but I have moved over to trynot2hate because my boss has a habit of reading my entries, and since lately I want to write of my hatred of her...I had to change diaries...take care. J.
from retaliashun :
wouldn't your weekend nights out having "fun" with "refreshing beverages" be considered something that is just as passionate :)
from staceykp :
Life would be so much easier if we all found our passion and developed it at an earlier stage. The unfortunate part is the fact that very few people are able to turn it into anything profitable, so we're left waiting until we can afford to feed the passion. Lame!
from djc360 :
"full force forward" -- i like it!! i think i'm going to make that the title of the next crappy song i write, heh. it's not copyright though, is it?
from djraindog :
J -- Kazaa installs evil programs on your computer which fuck it up hardcore. So do a lot of websites. Never say "Yes" when a pop-up asks if you want to install the newest weather-watcher-spam-protector-hard-drive-washer-cock-sucker-ass-licker...You get the picture. You could find & remove them, but then, Kazaa wouldn't work. My solution: external hard drive backup of data. Firewire or USB. I'd offer to fix your computer woes for you, as that's what I do in my wretched miserable day job, but I'm 3,000 miles away or something, so...*shrug* Sorry.
from djc360 :
yeah, i think he wrote a sequel to taht book, that focuses on the meditation and spiritual practice side of things. i haven't read it though.
from raptorjeff :
The quote is from BRING IT ON. Where's my ten points?? =) Btw, I have 12 maps of the same state? WHY?? I feel your pain.....
from alyt :
"Just Bring It" and "Not Another Teen Movie".
from peteypuke :
todays entry is my life story basically. i am the ultimate consumer. i get a boner from things like "collect them all!" or "new and improved" or even "limited edition collectors item". i just can't say no. the more stuff i accumulate the more the emptiness i am trying to fill grows. it doesn't ever solve anything but hey i got some really cool stuff to play with if you ever come visit ...
from retaliashun :
you can also try "Zen & The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance" robert pirsig.
from djc360 :
i recommed a book called "awakening the buddha within: tibetan wisdom for the western world" by Lama Surya Das.
from ddrboy :
Interesting...Dancers are worth it!
from ryan8-5cut :
Hey jonathan this is Ryan8-5 cut let me know the next time you hit one of those infamous parties, Id love to go
from tmb :
Hmm, I'm sure the explanation to your parents was quite amusing to hear.
from sfaboi :
Did you catch her name though? Princess Feona = Ugly Princess. It took me a while before I caught it.
from hanknbg :
I always keep my mouth shut..unless it's someone you really dont like anyway then go for it!
from faux-homo :
I find the best route is to just be blunt as hell with everyone...that way there is no gossiping and you can say all the same stuff to the persons face or..for shits and giggles..behind their backs.
from ozwald :
Yes. It's gossiping. Why cause problems? I've learned that the hard way. oz
from djc360 :
are you sure he didn't run away from you intentionally? i used to have a pen-pal of sorts, but when i told him i was gay, i never heard from him again. no no, i have no bitterness at all :P
from pocket-pool :
Wish I could have done the clipping for you. Forest is not so hot as clipped, but clipped is hotter than bald. How are your hands? Been tanning yet?
from urbancadence :
Tuesday nights are American Idol nights! How could you be still searching for something good on TV on Tuesdays?
from sfaboi :
I have had guys do that to me. They have also come up and slap me because "they wanted to". WTF? I still give evil looks to that bitch. I had someone this weekend tell me that they have had a crush on me forever and that I shot them down. I saw their picture and I was like...I wasn't drunk when I told you I was dating someone else. LOL Truthfully I was dating someone, so I didn't lie.
from ozwald :
OMG - that movie was amazing! And Roaul just makes me wet thinking about him.
from hanknbg :
I have a steam cleaner...it's OK but it certainly doesn't clean glass like they show on TV. I need the nice bleachy smell to be convinced those nasty germs are really dead. It did a great job on a moldy refrigerator tho!
from pocket-pool :
Were your diary boring, I wouldn't keep reading it! (Unlike mine which is revolting. Who wants to watch a man in his death throes?) Your entry today had me in stitches. Queso and Steve... I'd go for the queso to be sure. Then again, turn out the lights and all cats are black at night. Who knows what he's packing! Keep on and fear not. And now that I know that sending you emails is not a way to get to suck your dick, no emails from me! :-o ~seth~
from sfaboi :
Next time someone wants to take you to lunch go to this little Greek place (Alexander the Great Greek) in the galleria area. It is across the street from the valet part of the Nordstrom's parking lot. (Corner of Sage and whatever road the water wall is on.) I love that place. It has the best Gyros I have had. It isn't that expensive either!!
from ohio21boy :
i thought the violence in vol.1 was pretty "cartoony." I can't wait for vol.2. Just thought I'd share...
from doghigh :
What an absolutely appropriate description of Bushy!! Love it...
from lvrebelman :
Ooh!!!! Get the orange flip-flops from the Gap!! I really like mine! :-)
from sfaboi :
0 ALCOHOL 0 CIGS ? WEIGHT - I THREW THE SCALE AGAINST THE WALL WHEN IT KEPT TELLIN LIES. I THINK IT WAS OUT TO GET ME.
from loopyboi :
Excellent that you enjoy Erasure and Madonna!!! And better STILL -- I adore "Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion", and my partner is in love with "Elvira, Mistress of the Dark"! (Seen "Elvira's Haunted Hills", yet?) Anyway -- I just happened to be clicking around and stumbled onto your diary. :) Have a great day! ~ Jamie
from kstyle :
hey, since you're a big tv fan, have you see the brini maxwell show on the style channel on friday nights? it's the best! kind of like a 70's martha stewart, only it's a drag queen...very sweet and outrageous at the same time. the music, the sets...it's all sooo good...check it out if you can...there's a few double entendres scattered about too, that make it all the much more fun to watch...
from sfaboi :
I personally think the spy is the soccer player. I wanted it to be the model girl that got the first rose just b/c she that would make all the girls hate her so she could really find out what they are like. BITCHES!! As far as the stalker, I think it is the girl who is from NY that said she had everything going for her and that she wanted a big family. Ok and that bitch needs to rethink her approach. "I am gonna get him no matter what" ARE YOU CRAZY?!?! APPARENTLY SO!! I don't think I could run from her enough. PSYCHO!!! And stalking him is going to make him like her how much more? It is almost like the movie Swimfan. GEEZ
from arianstar :
um i think the spy is the brunette soccer player from San diego? Meagan i think..maybe like the 4th girl he picked...someone on the radio here TEVO'ed it, and paused it- getting a glimpse of the girls hair. He said it was brown and he saw that she was wearing a black dress that was low cut in the back, with a tie thing hanging down her back,, so thats where they got the clues from.
from pocket-pool :
Your last entry and the one before it turned me into a grinnin' fool. My LO is back from away and something fuzzy is between us as well. Go us! I'll be thinking about you and your test results, but dollars to donuts you're fine. Anticipation sucks. ~seth~
from ozwald :
My philosophy is that the more I worry the less likely said thing I'm worrying about will happen. I'm stoopid. oz
from davemarr :
How did your STD panel turn out?
from sleepy-gurl :
hmmm if you got those black glasses i have a feeling you'd resemble this mexican singer named aleks syntek. just slightly.
from kstyle :
ooooh, i LOVE anne tyler!
from djc360 :
for the future, you might be relieved to know that this is now available: http://www.nytimes.com/2004/03/27/health/27IMMU.html?hp
from urbancadence :
Lucky you. I've never had my penis fondled by a woman before. Big fat bummer. :(
from hanknbg :
Hey Tricksie (that's my pet name for my slutty friends)...I can't even remember if you had a nice penis...I was too confused that you didn't look like you.
from al-seedus :
theres nothing like the female touch. lol. congrats. j/k
from urbancadence :
Well, if he's displeased with you, I'm sure he'll let you know soon enough. It really makes no sense to let you know that he's pissed off at you without actually telling you. Just let the drama queen bit wear out and he'll spill sooner than later. Or you can just go ahead and ask him if you're impatient. I hate these cold wars. They're so first-grade-I'm-not-speaking-to-you childish.
from pocket-pool :
You? Whore? Pffff. My only problem with what you did was that it didn't happen to me! The best part is that he wants more. That says something about you, doesn't it? Yeah! Go you!
from ddrboy :
I think you're fine. But it's a good thing you're going!
from alyt :
I say if you're interested give the guy a call. If not don't bother. Screwing someone more than once does not indicate courting. I should know. I'm a bit of a whore myself. As long as fun was had by all it doesn't realy matter if it was a one time thing or the beginning of something. Good luck with your test.
from tmb :
Slut! (Now excuse me while I go back and reread that "cum-while-getting-my-ass-eaten part...)
from urbancadence :
Steps of the Ho-Bags Anon 12-Step Program: Step 1 - Admit that you're a Ho-bag. Step 2 - Repeat step 1 until you're bored of it, or until the boyfriend kills you, whichever comes first. Simple, isn't it? ;)
from davemarr :
You trashy whore! Sounds like fun times to me!
from djraindog :
Mmm...You naughty devil...I'm so proud of you. ;-)
from urbancadence :
Whoops, I didn't notice you had another new entry before this latest one. Nevermind the Carlos question :)
from urbancadence :
Well there are 12-step programs for ho-bags, but with the hot gay guys, they usually stop at step 1 :) Sorry about Carlos. Is he talking to you yet? Or rather, has he at least progressed to getting mad at you for the right reason yet? (wait, do you want him to?)
from lvrebelman :
*sigh* Well, I can't stand up from my chair for the next couple of minutes, and it's all your fault! Actually, it's mine. I shouldn't let your well, "sexy" entries arouse me... :-D
from pocket-pool :
what the fuck was he doing in YOUR wallet anyway?! 17 years later i STILL don't go in the L O's, nor do i look at his checkbook. hell, i don't even know his salary! ~seth~
from urbancadence :
I see dead people ;) And the one hovering next to you right now is Mary-Angela. BOO! Hahahahaha! :-P
from urbancadence :
Take care - whenever you update your diary, the Specter of Diaryland is actually watching you from behind. She looks like an innocent little girl, but she wields a knife that she uses to slit the throats of people that catch her spying. So whatever you do, don't turn around. And be careful when you go to the bathroom at night - she'll follow you. Buahahahaha! >:)
from pocket-pool :
I loved that list yesterday (and today's)! It was fun to compare Seth to Jonathan, or just think about things I'd never really thought about before. Thanks! ~Seth~
from hanknbg :
Ah yes...the Sears catalog was one of my favorites too!
from tmb :
#1: My favorite angel was always Kate Jackson as Sabrina. #21: Isn't that the way it works? What are you trying to imply?
from kimnsrv :
Tattletale bitch: Write something about how you suspect that she is being trainedfor a position much more important and thus financially significant than she has been lef to believe. And that you have been advised that she will be making approximately double what she was 'hired' to make, but that should she make even the slightest mistake, you have been instructed to rat her out, thus having her immediately terminated. Also mention that the new company policy on inter-office privacy, i.e. reading emails is groudns for immediate termination and the new 'security system' is so air tight, you don't know how the company has initiated it without violating the rights of its employees. Nosey bitch.
from kimnsrv :
Hope you're taking care of my little Keith. He's such a cool fella. Just wanna snuggle him to pieces. We all need to step out together on evening, dear. Love
from urbancadence :
I'm so glad that I'm your latest favorite diary :) I follow yours religiously, so please don't put the lock on it ever again!
from monkglen :
p.s. carlos is still there: GREAT. my lover and I are still together, going on 38 years...can you believe it. We're outliving people!
from monkglen :
i'm back gym man...not to say you'd remember me...i'm such an infrequent blogger here...but you impressed me always...NOW...describe that gym body to me baby
from scorpio05 :
i agree about Alias. also i know what you mean about the drainage system. cool journal :)
from urbancadence :
I know what you mean, Charmed may suck now, but I still watch it every week! :) Sometimes it's just too hilarious to miss!
from urbancadence :
Waking Carlos up just because he's sleeping while you're working is mean. But it's really cute :)
from urbancadence :
How do you get *it* up during sex if you're watching TV while you're doing it?? (Unless you're watching some porn cable channel)
from djraindog :
2 things: 1. Paying attention to TV during sex?! WTF?! 2. You can't kill your demons. You can lock them away, so they become the monster in the closet, always there, always threatening, or you can invite them to [insert social event of choice here] and then out dancing. I choose the latter, and the world would be a much better place if everyone else did too. The best defence against your demons is knowing them REALLY WELL, keeping them closer than your closest friends. You gotta own them, or they're gonna own you...And they ARE YOURS, after all. Happy weekend!
from urbancadence :
Yes, I agree that some of the guys on Fear Factor are just too hot. So no, you're not horrible for watching that show :) Seems to me that the cute ones always get eliminated early, though. At least the ones I fancy. Bah.
from pocket-pool :
That quote on time is fantastic! It is the essence of Zen. Thank you for sharing it. It's a keeper! And, of course, I wish you luck! :-) ~seth~
from hanknbg :
Get a group of co-workers together, make up fake stories about each other. Then make sure the bitch overhears the "gossip." She'll make an asshole out of herself and you can all have a good laugh. If not..there's always rat poison in the coffee.
from kstyle :
i'm really enjoing your diary...michael
from urbancadence :
Please don't lock your diary. You have no idea how many (anonymous) fans you have out here! :) On another note, yes, it sucks that Queer as Folk is wrapping up again! NOOO!!!
from pocket-pool :
Dribble? Dribble?! What you write is important. Period. If you want dribble (and drool) read my rants and roves. I was actually shocked to read that you said that you do! Keep writing and being as frank and candid as you have been. Change names, location, employ, whatever, but just keep sharing! ~seth~
from pocket-pool :
Thank you for unlocking! I'd just discovered and read a few random entries yesterday -- enough to rush to add you to my fav list. You're quite a feller! (And if it's worth anything, pseudonyms and other vagueries are fine in a diary. It's what I do. I still have that creeping I'd rather x not know feeling, so I hear you.) ~seth~
from loveyameanit :
Hey sweetie, I would take the high-road. There is someone that has described my diary, "Like a car wreck, it's terrible but you just can't look away", and it really annoys me that somebody would be that rude!! I mean there is no excuse for that, just mean and hurtful. But I think it's best to try to ignore it. Remember, I love ya...mean it! xxxooo
from losergeek :
you're locked? may i have a password, if you're handing them out? take care
from al-seedus :
wha? your locked?... or your done? theres no way for me to know, cause i cant read the entry.
from k9642042 :
Awww...sorry to hear about your departure from d-land. Hope you are well.
from cream :
Have I ever told you that I log onto D'land mostly to check whether you've updated cos I think you're fabulous?... Cos YOU ARE!
from hanknbg :
Actually...you were right. He did not like the fact that the book was being featured as an Oprah Book and refused to do the show. Don't listen to the twit..I'm sure you are cuter anyway. :)
from pocket-pool :
I want to stamp my little jeweled foot here and say I found your diary today, read a few entries, and was so struck by your style and candor that I immediately added you to my list of 'favs'. As for this issue that's popped up, I'll just say that somethings are best discussed via private email, not posted as a public note. Anywho, I wish I could go to the rodeo with you tonight. Levi's makes some of the best baskets! ~seth~
from ash-rose21 :
Perhaps you should get the information correct. It's alright, if it is your wish to look like an idiot by posting false information as fact, sobeit. I wont bother you anymore.
from ash-rose21 :
*book
from ash-rose21 :
That boos was a part of Oprah's Book club- that's why it has the label on it. Beleive me it it werent a part of her book club her name would NEVER be on it. See for yourself. http://www.oprah.com/obc/pastbooks/jonathan_franzen/obc_20010914_author.jhtml
from sfaboi :
Have you heard of the new show that has all of these fine guys on it and the girl has to choose one but some are gay and some aren't? All of these men have wonderful bodies! It starts next week. It is taking the place of the show where the girl and the annoying fat guy had to pretend that they were getting married. Have a good one!
from kimnsrv :
Jon, have any cute, single, funny, straight friends? Neither do I. Damn it all!
from djraindog :
Pouting?! That's what small children do when they aren't allowed to just eat candy. Perhaps my intolerance of passive-aggressive bullshit from adults is why I'm single, though I don't think that's a bad state of affairs. Do the pros outweigh the cons? I enjoy complete, alone, free more than obligated, sulked-at, hovered-over, but that's necessarily an individual decision. And I tend to be rather resolutely individual. Good luck, and remember to keep breathing.
from peteypuke :
Last night's episode was the best yet. I can't believe Catie is actually gone (as much as I hated her crybaby ass). At least they gave us one last flashback of her hanging in her harness having that fit. And the acting excercises! ... Did you not laugh yourself silly when Mercedes said, "I'm going first cause there's no way I am going to kiss him after all you nasty ho's." aaaaa
from simpleman81 :
I don't know if you would care, but I have read all of your journal entries and I feel like I could give some advice on the carlos thing. If you do, leave me a note in my journal or I.M. me on AIM at simpleman2181, late.
from cream :
Is ANTM the one with Adrienne, Giselle, and I've forgotten the names of the others...?
from tmb :
A picture is worth a thousand words. ;-)
from raptorjeff :
hey man.. enjoying ur daily life. It's good to see other people have the same tribulations as me. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that this FL boy is reading and thanks for opening ur life.
from simpleman81 :
I have been reading your journal lately, I hope you don't mind. I have really enjoyed it just thought I would let you know.
from smaxwel :
Sounds like you go through very similar emotions that I do with going out and facing people on a one to one situation. I just tell myself that I am shy. I go through the sweaty palms and all that stuff. Does it ever get easier?
from proseuche :
i was reading about the guilt and sex thing. i don't think your friend is right. i think we make moral decisions and use arguments, rationalizations that are aligned with those decisions that we make, so we can feel good about them. Even if that voice inside of us tells us we may not be on the right path. I don't think you can have sex with someone and not influence them in some way emotionally, because sex is more than just a physical act. I know people use that argument that it's merely a physical impulse that we all have, but i know it is meant to be more than that, it's meant to have an impact on an emotional, spiritual level.
from peteypuke :
does this make me retarded?
from peteypuke :
America's Next Top Model has got to be the BEST SHOW EVER. I can't imagine a Tuesday night without Camille's robot catwalk, Catie's crying fits, or Shandi's deformed giant ears. Tyra Banks for fucking president - nothing gets past her and she don't stand for no shit. Absolutely fucking riveting.
from davemarr :
The thing about sex is...no other animal (except humans) has issues and guilt regarding sex. They just do it (or chase off their suitor) and have a nice meal afterwards. We have guilt because of religious teachings and government directed moral beliefs which have been carried down through the ages. Keep in mind that America, as free as it is, is also very conservative. When a revealed bodypart causes an uproar in government, something is seriously wrong. Our bodies are not pornographic or obscene. We are derived from conservative England. In some respects, we are ages behind other cultures in social maturity. All that being said...my advice is to stay out of churches. That's where you got the guilt in the first place. They'll only teach you what's 'wrong' and what's to be 'feared'.
from ozwald :
Ugh. Steve Watson. He needs to be my boyfriend. I heard he is married - please - he's so gay.
from tmb :
I'm with you on Clean Sweep and Airline. Angelo gets my vote too, but Southwest will NEVER get my business if I can help it.
from eroswanker :
Just thought you'd like to know this tidbit (reported this morning in the New York Post's Pagesix): SUPER BOWL morning Houston's Millionaire Airport, which usually parks 50 private jets, had 600. Between touchdowns Madonna and Carmen Electra shopped at Galleria . . .
from lucytuesday :
holy mountain of notes batman. this is in regards really to a previous entry. but i think you should go where ever there's more security. i just keep getting this weird icky bush-is-going-to-"win"-the-white-house-and-murder-even-more-people vibe and that Can't be good for the economy. so if lesbians have more disposable income because they can combine wardrobes... then gay guys should have the same thing goin on with the clothes.... sharing... thing. ..... so... yeah. oh and thanks.
from sfaboi :
I have been referred to you by my friend Kim. She has me read you diary from time to time. I have some experience in taking the same job at the same company, in the same town that I had quit. I can say that it isn't the same. I don't have the same job, but I love what I do. I had to swallow my pride and move back to Nac of 1 Queer (Nacogdoches) and take my old job because it was the only one I could find. It turns out it is probably the best move that I have ever made. I have the same coworkers, but a different boss. We all work together as a team and we are now #5 in the nation. If you LOVED shell go for it, if not...take it anyway and just drink your way through it!!! It is amazing how alcohol can relieve stress. :)
from davemarr :
I think if you go into it knowing it's just a job that will pay you a lot of money, it's easier to go-with-the-flow. You know what the terrain looks like, so now you can adjust your movement over it.
from k9642042 :
i say go for the interview. You seem to hate where you are and it's more money.
from ozwald :
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
from davemarr :
Oh my. You can't buy moments like that. That's give them oldsters something to chat over a game of bridge.
from hanknbg :
Are you sure he didn't use it?
from lvrebelman :
Hmm... if it will make you the least bit better, every Tuesday and Thursday from 8:30a-9:45a, I have to share a classroom with one of my former roommates, who coincidentally once caught me "relaxing" with porn on the screen... Oh, and did I mention this is a public speaking class? A bit awkward, to say the least. :-)
from davemarr :
I would say generally I've dislike most of my co-workers and occasionally dislike my job. I really like doing my current job, and most of my co-workers, but am leaving for career and self-interest reasons. My last job I really disliked..and my co-workers were very unlike me. Things got so bad that my boss took me aside and said "if you don't like it, you can leave anytime". That was great advice. I chose to stop hating my job and think about the paycheck - which was substancial.
from doghigh :
I think it is obvious by my entries that I hate my job. But fortunately I know what I want to do for a living and have a renewed committment to making it happen by the end of the year. I always knew my calling...it has never been in question.
from cream :
BJ?!?! That's just asking for it. I found your joke funny :) I've got a weekend of birthday parties so feel free to drop by
from hanknbg :
Josh Duhamel yum...he used to be on my soap (AMC. He made my Men I'd Sleep with list long ago :) Naked pics? I guess it's time to google isn't it?
from ohio21boy :
hey. I'm going to chicago this weekend. I'd those are fun plans. Cold, but fun... have a good weekend.
from djraindog :
That's beautiful. Who, in the current cultural climate, would opt to call herself BJ?! Blissfully, in my office, there is no equivalent for "writing-up", and I pray I never work in a place where there is one...As often as I say "fuck" or various other offensive things, my file of write-ups would require an entire department to maintain it.
from lvrebelman :
I have "Billie JEAN" stuck in my head now, and it's all your fault! :-D
from kimnsrv :
Come by and visit sometime. Would love you input love!
from sweetone03 :
I love reading your diary, and if your bf gets fired it wil be ok like you said everything happens for a reason.
from tmb :
Shoe therapy to the rescue! I feel the same way about footwear.
from davemarr :
Took me a while to learn this one...but I discovered honesty is NOT the best policy at work. The best policy at work is doing as one is told and ass kissing. And remembering that work is only for making money to afford one's lifestyle.
from davemarr :
Our culture, gay and straight, is fucked up. We play so many games with each other in defense of our egos or emotions. I saw this guy on tv (speaking from another country) who pointed out how really twisted we Americans are...and how our rich and powerful culture is slowly effecting the rest of the world - with our bullshit. It's easy to forget we're the emotionally immature teenagers in world culture.
from kstyle :
you don't know me but i read ya often...have a great new year! - michael
from losergeek :
you know, i had that "ugly girl at the prom" feeling last night too. must have been a weird phase of the moon or something. hm. :p
from hanknbg :
I hit up the Bath and Body sale too. I have enough fruity soap to last a year.
from alyt :
Actually there is one. Only one. They moved it. It's a B Dalton. It was next to Lord and Taylor, Structure (now Men's Express) and Express. It's now next to the Macy's in the small annex that doesn't get much traffic. So either they plan on edging it out or trying to get more people into that part of the galleria. Who can tell?
from djc360 :
heh, "supposed former reality TV junkie"... *snicker*
from alyt :
I worked with someone like that - we had to share a cubicle. Talk about some uncomfortable moments. She would yell at her husband on the phone, the whole office could hear her (it was small). Probably the best thing is to bite your tounge. She won't change and going off on her won't help the already tense relationship. (I quit that job and now work with a nosey cowork - which is better I really couldn't tell you).
from ozwald :
Aw - that pic of you and Carlos is so cute - and ya. Co.workers. Mine just likes to bitch for the sake of bitching. It's not fun at all.
from jonathan :
I just love the read. How did I stumble in here? A favourite had you had as a favourite and I've done the same. Keep it up ... xx
from sleepy-gurl :
What a cute couple! You know, I met this dude at the club last week that looks EXACTLY like Carlos. I mean, he's a dead ringer for that dude. Except that guy told me he was visiting from San Diego. But yeah, cute couple. <3
from pura-vida :
Y'all are too fucking cute. My thoughts: If you're filing for bankruptcy and find yourself spending extravagant sums, there's something wrong with the picture. I mean, what the fuck was it that got you to the point in which you had to declare yourself bankrupt, anyway? Duh. Some people are financially stupid, and that's just a fact. Also: moving near C's friends? That's got potential for danger, but it wholly depends on whether or not these people are nice and respect boundaries, or are totally rude and want to get their muddy paws all over your personal life. I just stated the obvious. Hmm.
from losergeek :
aww, cute picture :)
from glitzypuss :
Not sure if you'd ever come to read this but.. tee hee.. you sound really cute.. i hope your hangover gets better and that everything you wat in life comes true sooner or later! rather random person but hey.. it's great to have someone you don't know in the world send you a msg and say.. hey.. i think your cute! LOL! Don't ask! you take care! go easy on those drinks! toodles!
from ozwald :
Happy New Year!
from prophecyboy :
i just wanted to say thank you for the dvd again! i've been watching it over and over for the past two days or so... now i'm watching it with the commentaries!
from davemarr :
Have you checked to see if your dad has a profile on m4m? (giggle).
from cream :
Good Luck and Happy New Year xx
from nikkisboy :
Hi J, Well, I missed your birthday and I missed Christmas, so I guess it's just HAPPY NEW YEAR! I'm not really on the ball lately. Anyway, Buenos Cebollas. Damn the Mexican TV.
from srolive :
Hey J, cold weather makes me horny! Of course warm weather does too. I also find that rain makes me horny, although sunshine does th trick as well. Of course theres nothing better on a cloudy grey day than sex.
from hanknbg :
Mmmm...nudes. My mom said I looked "bald" when she saw my short hair (and I do a #2 all over. Christmas cookies are evil. Merry Christmas!
from tmb :
1. Merry Christmas! 2. The haircut sounds great - boo to Mom. 3. Add me to the list to send those nude pics to when you get some taken. ;-)
from davemarr :
Yea photos!
from tmb :
Happy Birthday Jonathan32!
from hanknbg :
Haaaaappppy Birthdaaaaaayyyyy to youuuuuuuuu!
from edduhduh :
HBTY HBTY HBDJ HBTY!!!
from mittag :
Happy Birthday. Oh, and I was stumbling around like a drunk and fell on your diary. I hope you don't mind. You're a really clever writer, and I couldn't help but keep reading. Thanks.
from ozwald :
Aw kid. I'm sorry your friends were lame on your birthday. You know if we lived anywhere near each other I'd have gone out and partied! Happy Birthday! OZ
from davemarr :
happybirthday!
from peteypuke :
happy birthday!
from whiskeyblood :
When times are hard, some people aren't as lucky as you to have the opportunity to still have a roof over your head, food, a job, a boyfriend for support. When you're on the brink of losing everything, and you've done everything in your power to keep it and yet it just keeps slipping from your clutches, sometimes it's hard to be happy. Perhaps youre friend should have done the same to you...and told you to wake up. Or, perhaps your friend was merely venting and being honest. I applaud her for not just saying "oh I'm good" like so many do. It takes a lot of strength to be honest like that. Because most people show their true colors after you've shown your honesty. This entry is proof of that for you..I guess.
from ryan8-5cut :
What email? you emailed me? hmph. Yep we're at least half sisters. Now we can screw around! Yeah! I think it was that day in the shower that did it for me. Sorry I didn't resond to the email. No harm intended.
from tmb :
Congrats on the job! And I'm glad to see your name lit up in red on my buddy list again.
from davemarr :
Happy, happy, joy, joy on the new job!
from losergeek :
happy birthday jonathan! :)
from ozwald :
YAY YAY YAY
from ameliarules :
what does Fubar mean, by the way?
from ameliarules :
WOOO! look at me leaving a note for you. I have no idea who you are, but I hope you have a nice life, and I will read some of your entries.
from cream :
Hurry back, I'm missing my regular fix of Jonathan! *grin*
from humanidiot :
hey! thanks for reading, and thanks for liking that entry! I like it as well. take care!
from whiskeyblood :
*lick* *lick* I really have been bad about signing these things lately. Sorry I haven't emailed you back either. Although I thought I had. GayOL is such a damn pain like that. Anyway, hope you're feeling better, my pet!
from lvrebelman :
I normally don't like to quote psychobabble, but I think it's appropriate today: One of the key features of someone having a mental disorder is that it interferes with their normal functioning (like the guy who spends 4 hours a day washing and can't do much else). From what I observe in people, I think we're all OCD-esque to some degree, especially after that whole Anthrax thing and those deadly viruses we hear about on CNN. Me? Sometimes after touching something I perceive as dirty, I wash. Then I think I touched it again (when I may have not), and I wash, again. Have a nice day! -Oscar
from sleepy-gurl :
Puta Spice...I so did not expect that. Thanks to you, ice cream that I had in my mouth is now on my monitor. Was that TMI? Sorry. :p
from doghigh :
TOTALLY a therapy moment...I'll be working on that one for a while, I think...
from sleepy-gurl :
Glad you're back hun! Thanks for the compliment on my template, I love it too. <3
from cream :
I don't know abt the songs but you should so go to the party... GO GO GO!!!!
from hanknbg :
oh hell yeah...go to the party! And the best way to prevent hovering is to stop what you are doing until the hoverer leaves you alone
from davemarr :
I think you should go to the party and take Carlos with you.
from lvrebelman :
lol, that "Can You Feel It" cover reminds me of London, my friend Holly and I danced to it in this gay bar next to a theater where "Mamma Mia" was being performed.... oh god, must cry now. -Oscar
from sleepy-gurl :
Oh my goodness shut up she's 29 and is a grandmother?
from cream :
I'm sorry to hear about your dad. I hope things will be ok for your family xx
from peteypuke :
jonathon honey, you ever need to talk about your pops just let me know - i watched my father go through cancer treatments twice i know how tough it can be to watch omeone you love go through that. all i can say is spend as much time with him as you can. he probably feels very alone right now. treatments are tough but people get through them and people get cured. all the time. every day even.
from losergeek :
*hug*
from al-seedus :
although we are strangers, im thinkin about you and your family... and i will for the best.
from afitchbaby87 :
Im so sorry about your dad. Best wishes
from davemarr :
Sorry about your dad. Hugs from San Francisco.
from girlwcurls :
I'm so sorry about your father, hun.
from peteypuke :
Petey Puke (in his best homer simpson voice): "mmmmmm ... guys jerking off in the shower"
from cream :
Why do you bother asking why? It's so much easier just nodding and smiling at the appropriate moments. Oh and I too absolutely encourage whorish behaviour... inhibitions get in the way of life.
from doghigh :
Oh god I am all for limiting the number of children people have! I love kids and would like one of our own one day...but damn it is plain selfish and egotistical to have more than two kids (unless you are adopting and can afford the extra mouths)...screw it if people don't agree, right?
from djraindog :
Arg...Sorry I haven't updated in ages; I'm just insanely busy, and I need to sleep more, and I haven't even been writing anything in the notebook over the last week or so...I need some discipline. *le sigh*
from chazaq :
YES! You can do it! I believe in you!!!
from hanknbg :
That's the problem with tricks..one day they just want to fuck and the next they are boiling your rabbit. And yes...that is Lil... the damn freak!
from mammas-pills :
Two things. One: I hate my ass mental, that's hilarious. and B: This may be misconstrued as something bad, but I have often thought that mussels (the inside part, not the shell...okay, maybe the shell, too, but mostly the inside part) look a bit like little vaginas. I am no expert and have very little to draw from to make this comparison, but hey...anyway, there you go. oh and 'survivor' as the song title for my journal...that's flattering. Take care, J.
from tmb :
Very nice template, very interesting entry... and you use "Bad Girl" as a description for my diary! Pretty soon you're going to have to start going to the parent-teacher conferences at school <snicker>.
from sssshhhh :
Hey! Just found ur diary, I'm enjoying it lots! Just thought I'd share that with ya :) K
from hanknbg :
Whoa..I listened to "Survival" on my way to work this morning too. And "Ray of Light" is a great compliment. Thank God I wasn't "Papa Don't Preach."
from prophecyboy :
hah! well thanks! i just wrote a pretty lengthy entry inspired by the song's lyrics! i guess i saw myself in the rest, as well. i like it, so keep it! i need to find a way of downloading that song, or maybe i'll go out and get the CD or something. i'd like to hear it. the lyrics moved me. i was touched!
from ohio21boy :
I can't remember if I left you a note about this or not, but thanks for the "material girl."
from prophecyboy :
i've never heard 'promise to try' - but now i'm gonna have to look up the lyrics...
from ash-rose21 :
I like reading you too much to let that slip :)
from ash-rose21 :
The destiny's child song is called SURVIVOR not Survival.
from tmb :
But why don't you ever post photos?
from tmb :
Well, I'm certainly glad I don't read your diary at work ;-)
from ryan8-5cut :
now that we've showered together i feel much closer. What dd you think of the tat? did you see it?
from djraindog :
Caught that. ;-) And thank you. Not sure I'd have pegged u for a Sag. I had a friend whose b'day was 15 Dec. I was a little in love with him, I think. Sadly, he died three days after his birthday a few years ago. Life is short; never hesitate to live it.
from prophecyboy :
hot
from djraindog :
O, this is difficult. "Sky Fits Heaven" with all that great wisdom? No. "Impressive Instant" ('Cause I, too, like to singy-singy-singy)? No. "Skin" (I'm not like this all the time; I swear I'm not.)? No. "RESCUE ME" just hits all the truth. Cool question, btw. What's your birthday? Just curious...
from djraindog :
J-to-the-2-9-stud: SO proud of you. Myself was at an orgy last night, too! Details may be forthcoming if I ever decide to start typing these things in after I write them down again. You're a good man for playing safe; I agree the idea is hot, but no fuck is worth my life. Or anyone else's, in my opinion. Peace.
from ryan8-5cut :
By the by, thanks for making my diary "Vogue". It's by far her most famouse song and one of my favs. I appreciate it!
from ryan8-5cut :
Jonathan, do you notice that whenever you're feeling down your penchant for risky sexual behavior and drinking starts to increase dramatically? I know the feeling, but be careful my young buck. I don't want anything to happen to you.
from prophecyboy :
finding a job is pretty hard. when you don't get the results that you expect, it's harder on the self-esteem, just like you were saying. maybe you're trying to re-connect with your friends to make up for not finding a job? i mean.. the seriousness of it. not the actual re-connecting part. because we all want to connect. it's natural. i know, for me, anyway. i tried to reconnect with my friends as a subsitute for feeling bad about not connecting with guys, in a love-relationship sense. i tried to use that avenue as a substitute. accept that your friends will come by when they do. and if they don't want to be around you, then you don't want them to. there may not be reasons behind it. i know that my friends care for me. but right now, things are just so different, that our paths don't cross. it happens. you'll find that new job. and you'll find your friends. in time. it's the desperation that's killing you. i know cuz i feel it, too.
from davemarr :
men4sexnow! haha. I sometimes use a site called m4m4sex. Hot, freshly baked, home delivery! Slut. Speaking of your hot ass, photo por favor!
from tmb :
I love it when you talk about asses. ;-)
from whiskeyblood :
BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!!! God I love you! The cute thing of all that is my friend Geoff just got in touch with me today. He was the kid that was 3 years younger than me and in my grade. Of course he and I were instant friends and we plotted the destruction of the world together. His band is gonna be in town next week raising money for the books for prisoners program and he actually emailed me to see if I still lived here. So see. Not everyone picks on peeps, yo. I would have embraced you like the clap!
from lvrebelman :
Oh God. That so reminded me of the time my kinderegarten teacher thought I was retarded (and had me tested for it)... Oh well, I proved the witch wrong when I learned to read before 3/4 of the class caught on and became really good at math. :-)
from rosemarie4u :
hi as my name implies i`m here 4 u . so go ahead shock me.rosemarie
from whiskeyblood :
1.)Someone is high maintainence today! Sheesh. I will remember to comment everytime your diary makes me laugh. Keep in mind you're going to have a shit-ton of notes from me. 2.)Dude, phat pants are so like 96. They were really implimented with rave culture which I was a huge part of for about 7 years. It's all about the style of dance with the clothes etc...there is cultural signifigance..i'm just too tired and tipsy to let you in on it just now. Later. Lover. And if I were there I'd kiss your asshole better. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAA
from ozwald :
I've been madd busy up in here today - you are one crazy office bitch. Anyway - HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
from davemarr :
Personally...I don't get the trend of HipHop. Although the music is sweet, the lyrics are so ignorant. Generally, they are soley about bootie calls, getting high and fighting. Dumb.
from hanknbg :
Re: the morale boosting exercise. I had a friend who wrote in a co-worker's "happy thoughts" book, "It makes me happy when my Daddy touches me down there." She spent the next several days trying to convince her bosses she didn't need counseling to work through her "abuse issues." Apparently, incest jokes are not appropriate for a lesbian's "happy thoughts" journal.
from cream :
It's on, it's on...
from ryan8-5cut :
"I did temp work today at the hospital with Malik and Shonesha...go figure. They said to tell you hello. And I ask you are all time bitch!" Okay, so this is what you left in my guestbook last night. Do you know what it means and can you decypher it. I think you mushave been a wee bit drunk. BTW congrats on boning hot legs.
from al-seedus :
i just realized that your favorite profile comments are MADONNA related. lol. im a dork. yay for you and hot legs.
from mammas-pills :
Thanks. :) take care, J.
from ozwald :
What ever happened to the Houston deal? Oh and ya ... hot story. And why aren't you ever on messenger anymore?
from tmb :
Now this is the Hot Legs story that I've been waiting to read ever since you first mentioned him. The only thing missing was more description of his (I imagine) tight, muscular ass.
from cream :
Oh my you are the best when being your worst! I can't believe that he wanted to swallow!! that is so not 'normal' here. Oh well it sounds like you did what you wanted to do so that's great. I need a few of those friends that you sleep with... *sigh*
from davemarr :
Why wouldn't you cum in his mouth? Seems that's what he wanted and there's no risk to you.
from peteypuke :
you whore! could you, like, tell that story again? but slower and with more details? :)
from davemarr :
Chill out dude...and tell your bf what's going on with you. This is what he's there for. Tell him you need a little support, sex or a drinking buddy. Whatever it takes. This shit will pass sooner or later so don't fret it. Enjoy the fact you don't have a job to go to for a while. Rock!
from ozwald :
Steve is MINE! You can't have him! MINE MINE MINE
from bettyalready :
Man, I'd be all about showing them you had gotten it....
from edduhduh :
Way to go man. Big congrats to you for taking the time to go get something you earned so long ago. ;)
from chazaq :
I wonder if they would give your job back if you showed them you have your associates after everything goes through. I'm really sorry things SEEM to be falling apart. They're not, you know. Life is just rearranging itself into something better. Butterflies.
from djraindog :
Based solely on having read the whole story as you've presented it here, I'd say moving yourself to Dallas would be a good thing. You're obviously clever & talented, and there's no way in Heaven Earth or Hell I'd stand for the bullshit you seem to put up with.
from sleepy-gurl :
I think that's awesome that you're going back to school! Good luck.
from edduhduh :
I haven't been keeping up on my diary reading lately, but I just got updated on your situation. Sorry to hear about it. I'm still looking for work myself. It's been four months now. Minus a couple of weeks in hawaii of course. Cheer up, take a trip or something.
from chazaq :
definitely go. It's always good to know all your options. :)
from lvrebelman :
lol, I usually become the same way when I'm sick...Jerking the pain away, as I say. :-)
from paco758 :
Dude. I thought that I was the only person in the universe to have that sort of ultrasound, though thankfully I didn't have the problem that you had. The situation itself was enough of a turnoff.
from chazaq :
www.brilliantpeople.com
from cdghost :
pretty
from epeter2025 :
I was feeling down because I had no shoes, but then I saw a man who had no feet...and I laughed. I laughed really, really hard.
from doghigh :
wow-just read your entries today...terrible news, I'm sorry to hear it...hope things come together again for you. positive vibes heading your way...
from cream :
Karen Walker - what a mentor!! And no it's not bad to say that you're going to stay cos anyway you're on a probation period and they're not going to think 'oh poor jonathan won't have a job so we'd better not fire him' if they're not satisfied with your performance. So don't feel sorry for them if you're not satisfied with the job and something else comes along.
from ohio21boy :
hey. thinking of you...
from ms-ashlynn :
So sorry man. Life just sucks sometimes.
from ozwald :
Oh god that sucks. I can't believe that shit. Sending good vibes. OZ
from hanknbg :
I cannot believe they would fire you over something like that. Is Sierra Mist a Coke product? Please tell me no...that's all I drink. I think you should post the secret formula here..that will show the bastards! Ugh! Hugs from Ohio
from cream :
damn that sucks! i'm sure you'll find something soon enough though. until then enjoy your free time!
from chazaq :
I'm sorry you no longer have your job, but YAY! more entries! And you'll have more time to spend at the gym and work on ways to improve your relationship with Carlos. :) HAPPY DAY! That's what this is.
from vrylucky13 :
Just wanted to say 'ello. I found your diary through some random searching, and yeah. Its very entertaining. okies, over and out. mwah
from whiskeyblood :
OH MUH GAWD MISS THANG YOU DIDN'T! Madonna songs for everyone! HEHEHEE...*kisses*
from whiskeyblood :
the new me
from doghigh :
oh dear god...i was so not a beckham-ite...UNTIL i saw the pic you posted...i think i need to change my underwear...
from lvrebelman :
(Not so) oddly enough, I am exactly the same way... I guess trying to find the "gay" version of everything (from restaurants to plumbers) eventually leads to feeling a bit abnormal in society, like "handicapped" versions of things do. I think it's nice to go somewhere for the sake of going there rather than because of the type of people who will be there. -Oscar :-)
from davemarr :
Uh yeah...I meant UNemployment checks. You just have to fight for them and stick to your guns.
from davemarr :
ABOUT THE JOB: It's better to get fired than to quit. Employment checks! ABOUT THE HOMOPHOBIA: Dude I so agree. I consider myself a 'gay-lifestyle-aphobe'. I like the homoSEXuality part, it's the 'Im-really-gay-and-everyone-should-know types who turn me off. 'm certainly not opposed to some affection in public tho. I've got nothing to hide - nor anything to shove down someones throat. Well, actually I do....
from gagfactor :
You just made me shoot diet pepsi out of my nose! Fucker!!!! I don't know if I have any gaybo gays on my list...I shall check and report back!
from gagfactor :
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I LOVE YOU MORE THAN EVER! I'm pretty much a total homophobe. I hate it when people squeal about shit or mince. Ugh. MINCING. UGH UGH UGH. Although I've been known to gratuitously discuss butt sex in line at a resteraunt just to be irritating. BUt that's funny. Gay men suck. No pun intended. It's like..have a life much? No. Didn't think so queerbo. Ugh..now I've made myself enemies.
from epeter2025 :
Ok...yeah, scary movies and I do not along very well either, although I have enjoyed some of them. I am made fun of constantly because of it and I am now refusing to go and see Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
from hanknbg :
Ack! You clean the same way I do, well I wear clothes. But it sure looks great when it's all done doesn't it? Ugh re: fudged resume.
from prophecyboy :
hang in there bud. you presented a tough question about your job. i really don't know what will or might happen. being that i'm clueless about those things. but i'm sure you'll be fine. my friend had told me that jobs don't really have the time to look at your schools to see if you were there or not. he says that he's never heard of anyone getting fired for that. but, i guess he might be wrong. so i'm just kind of waiting around with you, trying to see what happens. but i hope the best for you.
from gagfactor :
You have NO idea. Welcome to my life...only it's my cats sitting on the couch watching me run from room to room muttering to myself like an asshole. *smooch* We're all crazy. It's totally okay.
from nikkisboy :
Don't quit. And never, ever admit wrong-doing. Playing dumb usually works. Or you could tell them you were just auditing a course. I don't think that would have shown up on your transcript.
from smaxwel :
I would stick around too. If they ask you about it, act like you don't understand why or what is going on. "I don't get whey that wouldn't show up, Hmmmm" And leave it at that. Keep up posted on the progress
from cream :
Explain that it wasn't really a lie but merely an oversight as to the after-effects of the misdemeanour; yet they shoudl keep in mind that despite it all it has not affected your performance at work, and that should not interfere with their undoubted good judgement of your character... I think that bullshits enough. Good luck :)
from chazaq :
yeah, I agree...wait it out. Don't bail, or you'll always wonder what would have happened.
from ohio21boy :
I wouldn't bail. Stick it out, I bet it won't be that bad. good luck, though
from epeter2025 :
aw..where did the picture go? You took it down? That makes me....sad *points to eye*
from italktowalls :
Funniest picture ever! That image is going to keep me in laughing fits for the rest of the day.
from edduhduh :
You almost look like Sydney in the picture.
from sleepy-gurl :
LMFAO @ "That makes me...sad." That is too funny because I do that too! LOL! And I also pronounce 'comfortable' 'com-FORT-able' but just to be a dork.
from epeter2025 :
You've been quite the the writing machine lately. Priceless note to the father. We stole a whole bunch of my friends Dad's Xanax once, but we were too strung out to leave a note...go figure.
from gagfactor :
If you're going to mix in wet food make sure you don't use anything with tuna or other fish. They are the ultimate offenders. You may also want to try giving your feline some hairball remedy and getting him one of those cat grass things...I feed my cats Indoor Cat Food and it seems to have stopped the barfing that happened when we first moved. You may also want to consult a vet about it too...never know what the pukey pukey may mean.
from cream :
That note is brilliant! I'm sure he hates you now but it's still brilliant! :)
from gagfactor :
Dude..i hope you feed your cat dry food too. Canned food is HORRIBLE for male cats. It's high in phosphates which can lead to urinary tract blockages...for the love of god switch him over to a dry urinary tract food. It'll save you money in the long run.
from ozwald :
That man in the gap commercials could cause a spontaneous orgazm! I swear. They don't make 'em much hotter than that.
from epeter2025 :
*BANG* No, straight men do not wear Diesel shoes. It's a law.
from tigerlily32 :
Hi. I am new here, but I just wanted to say that you are a pretty funny guy. I didn't realize that guys shaved int he sauna. Yuck. Makes me glad I'm a chick! And one more thing. My BIT backs in to park...it irritates the shit out of me.
from brye :
ewwww. shave in the sauna.. i have never like those saunas anyway.. YAY for checkcards... my 80y/o grandpa uses his checkcard at the grocery store even.
from epeter2025 :
I'm guilty of backing into parking spaces and I admit is a time-saving thing, or at least that is my theory. I'd rather spend the time backing in before heading into the store rather than spending the time afterwards. I drive a Honday Civic though, which is much easier and doesn't take the amount of time that a Suburban does. Fuckin SUVs.
from paco758 :
My chiropractor also told me that he had never seen anyone else exhibit that reaction to an adjustment. He said that he had seen people cry but never laugh for no reason. I am also glad that I am not alone in this.
from lvrebelman :
Hmm... have you tried Diet Rite? I know it's made with sucralose, which is made from real sugar (or so the Atkins Diet book says). The only problem with it is that it has no caffeine.. :-( -Oscar
from kstyle :
what if you're at level 9 and you only need one chair? what would they do? would the world end? oh god, that is so silly! to think that's actually someone's job...you SHOULD have told her you were colorblind, and very sensitive about it, perhaps that would have stopped her for a second...
from kristintracy :
Coco Queenstown is a porn name that just melts in your mouth! Sexcellent!
from gagfactor :
*blush* awww..you shouldn't have. "Obla Di Obla Da My Dick is Loooog OH..honey my dick is long." Fuckin' tards. *giggle*
from gagfactor :
I would kill for a window...no windows to be had in this section of the building though. Corky from Life Goes On was the man with the plan in pulling this wing together. Idiots. Congrats on your promotion, slut.
from tmb :
I'm glad you and Carlos were able to talk things out; at least that's a good starting point to build on. I like your concept of multitasking, by the way.
from lvrebelman :
Just so you know, I almost spit out my apple juice because of you... have a good day! :-) -Oscar
from al-seedus :
sounds like its time to end it with carlos. seems like another freeloader case for the ricky lake show, and your playing "sucker". good luck on the heart-to-heart. vote him off.
from epeter2025 :
Since it has the suction cup action, I think you should suction cup it to your forehead. I know I wouldn't be able to stop laughing.
from tmb :
Practice makes perfect. (And I hate to bring this up, but the dildo looks so, well, petite in the photo you posted.)
from al-seedus :
is hot-legs really married to a woman, or do you mean "wife" as in his boyfriend? I may have missed an entry and i dont want to get confused. reply please.
from doghigh :
wow...I must be going to the wrong gym :-) the only show i get is the 80 year-old cleaning guy bending over to pull hair out of the drain...
from doghigh :
Congratulations on the addition(s) to the family! Such a lovely pic...
from cream :
hehe. they make such good ornaments standing by your books.
from tmb :
Workout buddies. Mmm-hmm.
from epeter2025 :
Yeah, the Machine sucks. Although I have to say that I myself have been in a wet underwear competition here in D.C. OOPS! I won though, so it was all good.
from ryan8-5cut :
hey hey hey looks like things are a heatin up with hot legs. that sounded like a bona fide invitation to me
from al-seedus :
I know how your in love with the show "alias". I was on the ABC website looking at unrelated stuff and noticed that they have two alias games you can play. Ive never watched the show and havent checked out these games, but i thought i would pass the site on to you.. maybe youll like it. http://abc.go.com on the right side of the screen click on "select a show" and scroll all the way down. its under "games". let me know if its any good. take care, nancy.

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