PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER. - Groucho

I am not a lesbian, I eat red meat, and I DO NOT cut my skin with sharp objects.

I know, I'm totally abnormal.

I never had a barbie doll as a kid, when I asked for one for Christmas I received a Captian and Tennille doll set instead.

Perhaps, that is where it all went wrong.

My favorite diaries:

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comments: Witty and sarcastic, what every woman should aspire to be.
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comments: Fucking vultures. Enough said
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comments: "Please note that my writing is not suitable for children, animals or religious leaders (unless of course your religion involves a lot of swearing, drinking and sex. And if thatís the case, please email me with details."
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comments: "I've probably got entire legions of the little guys in there still, clambering to be let out."
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comments: "The highlight of my day has been untangling a slinky no less than five times. This is my stress yardstick - if I can still manage to do this without hurling it against the wall then the stress levels are still manageable."
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comments: "Things I'm not going to miss: clients who clearly wear loafers because they can't possibly tie their own shoes."
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comments: How can I not adore a woman who tells her children that the mini marshmallows she is serving for desert are snowman poops.
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My favorite music:

Slayer
Rage against the Machine
Soundgarden
Audioslave
Eric B & Rakim

My favorite movies:

Office Space
comments: "No, not again. I... why does it say paper jam when there is no paper jam? I swear to God, one of these days, I just kick this piece of shit out the window."
Stir Crazy
comments: "We tried to teach him Charades! He Didnt Get it! He just didnt get it! "
Saturday Night Fever
comments: "Sometimes you don't have to kill yourself in order to kill yourself. "
Big Night
comments: "Sometimes the spaghetti likes to be alone."
Waking Ned Devine
comments: "There'll be cursing in heaven tonight, Ned Devine."

My favorite authors:

Stephen King
Anne Tyler
Tim O'Brien
Charles Bukowski

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last updated: 2013-06-12 02:41:49
this user's total entries: 899
user since: 2003-10-06

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