messages to dangerspouse:
(click here to add new message):

from raven72d :
How is 2024 so far?
from raven72d :
Joyeux Noel 2023!
from fungal-nail :
I mostly make fabric dolls, using embroidery for the features and to decorate them. I also like to use it to customise items and clothing I already have. I'm not really familiar with the terms but yes I believe it is surface embroidery.
from portlypete :
Halloween can be hard for some these days. I stay indoors and avoid opening the door lest the Perve Police are passing. Is it right to offer a 3-Musketeers bar (I have no idea!) to some small child knocking at the door. I blame America (for pretty much everything - sorry). Life used to be so simple.
from nerryna :
That pumpkin Pi is GENIUS.
from raven72d :
I'm thinking Dalmore for the holidays, but I'm always open to new single malts! I hope your holiday season is festive and full of tasting menus and great music!
from raven72d :
Glad to hear the reno projects are going well! And...happy Halloween!
from nerryna :
I do suck I am sorry. But you gave us an update and Dell's pictures ... thank you! Definitely sending good wishes into the universe for all things to be well on your side.
from raven72d :
I always enjoy hearing from you. And you do have thoughts of support. If all else fails, abscond to Invercargill NZ. Or Sapporo. If I'm doing my Al Stewart "Running Man" scenario, we'll have a beer or two.
from alethia :
In all seriousness, I hope you're holding up okay. Your stress leaks through your humour. I'm not very good at murder, but if you'd like I could follow some of your enemies around saying "SORRY, SORRY" in a very sarcastic Canadian way. Also, I hope you update us on where you end up. I need to know, so I can vacation nearby, but never actually come for a visit.
from strawberrri :
What a lovely cat! :) xx
from misfitstray :
Hey there, why don't you write a book? Man, you are good at writing! Everybody here loves your sarcasm and style of writing. Every dumb ass writes books now, though you should too. :) All the best for renovating and moving and well everything. Btw. your cat is fat ... but cute ;)
from kelsi :
Hey there now, the Barbie movie is great. Good luck with the move and employment and all that. Also, beautiful cat!
from alethia :
Speaking of free porn on the internet, check out that Le Creuset! Hubba hubba!
from raven72d :
Yikes! Best of wishes on the employment situation!
from portlypete :
It’s been a while - several months - but I am here to tell you, there is life after spending the early hours trying not to doze off over some control panel. (Been there; no one ever gave me a T-shirt!) You are a talented guy (this info comes from DS.com) I’m sure you are creating a new career for yourself. I look forward to hearing about it soon.
from nerryna :
hello! hope you're doing well.
from bantenhut :
You you you you... became a taco?!?!
from jimbostaxi :
Hey, have no fear Jimbo is here! Sorry to hear about your job going bye-bye. You were way too good for them anyway! I'll drive by the office and throw a few bricks through their window. Your a good dude and I'm sure something better will land on your oversized penis in no time.
from swordfern :
Congratulations on being released from employment! You are smart and resourceful, and I trust that you'll find your way through the transition. Heck, you are even award winning! Anyhow, enough of the mushy stuff; I want to hear about the dead mouse.
from nerryna :
I'm sorry about your job. It was a delight coming on here and seeing you have a new post. Looking forward for more and hope things continues to be okay at your end.
from portlypete :
Have you been away? I hardly noticed. Life gets increasingly shite, but I have no doubt that you will get by, if only on some tasty concoction of ‘dead mouse a la twig’. Yum! I know a survivor when I see one.
from raven72d :
And...thank you for that video! Merci! A remix that's a bit more fun than Murray Head's version!
from raven72d :
A good rough pastry is always something to be treasured! How long did you fence? I wanted to learn the sabre, but I was never able to coordinate time, energy, and enthusiasm.
from gr8legs :
hey, danger! glad to see you around these parts :) sorry about your job. i pray you find something soon. maybe something different. perhaps something in photography! just a thought. good luck with the only fans, though. i hear it's quite lucrative.
from raven72d :
Thanks for that link! And their Man Ray chess set is inexpensive, too. I think I'll invest in one.
from raven72d :
A Man Ray chess set? I have to look for that! It should be a delight! And I've always been a fan of Duchamp.
from papotheclown :
Sad to hear about the job (and all the dead pets), but glad to see you back on here.
from alethia :
Oh man. Sucks about the layoff. I regularly get laid off (gig economy, whoo), but right now, I'm staring down the barrel of some very empty months. Keep strong, and cuddle your two foot dong if you feel anxious.
from raven72d :
Glad you're back, but...condolences on the downsizing! That really sucks, especially after 34 years! Anyway-- best of luck on finding something new and engaging and better.
from jarofporter :
good to see you back, just wish it wasn't for such a shitty reason! best of luck w/the job search, i'm sure you'll find something worthwhile!
from peggypenny :
"If There Is A Song It In" "I'm In Love"
from msafire :
Meetup.com you can find all sorts of weird interests as well as more normal ones to socialize with a bunch of rando strangers and perhaps become friends with some. Find your Inner Angel might not be the group for you... but there may be SOME hobby ...like say Frisbee Golf, which although weird you might actually enjoy and bond with some other lonely dudes looking for something to do at 10AM during the week. (No kidding a local musician in the DC area loves Golf Frisbee and is constantly asking his peeps...fans... cause he gigs all the time so doesn't have time for friends to get together with NORMALLY as he is working during those times; but somehow develops friendships with those who PAY him pretty well in support and gush over his talent it seems). I have a group of acquaintences/friends who over the years I went on hiking trips with. So I really do recommend Meet up.
from annanotbob2 :
Hello you, hope all is well. I'd really like you to read my entry of 5th June either 5/6 or 6/5 depending on your persuasion, where I have done outstanding kitchen work that I'd hate you to miss
from raven72d :
He was very much a character!
from loveherwell :
definitely the red bean paste!! :)
from alethia :
Just everything. It'll be ok. I was very exhausted and high when I wrote that. Heck, I'm high and exhausted now too. (Does your state have legal weed yet? It's literally the best. 10/10, would recommend government weed.) But it'll be ok.
from chakra-nadi :
you are so totally white
from mhscutie05 :
Punch in the chest? Lol I'd answer back with a punch to the throat! Better results and no one will disrespect you. Plus, it's better to be part of 'The Swansons' than a boy scout. ;D You deserve an A for effort.
from raven72d :
I'm fond of ham, lamb, and prime rib all three. It's really dangerous for me to be around an all-you-can-eat Easter buffet! Ham is a traditional Deepest South Easter dinner entree, though I have known a few people to cook (poach, essentially) a brisket. A good ham recipe would always be appreciated!
from alethia :
Have a look into the Twelve Tribes cult, and the Mormon fundamentalists in Bountiful. Those were the two big ones nearby, so you're not far off with either the sister wives, or the white robes...
from alethia :
That NXIVM business was absolutely insane. The town I grew up in was full of (less successful) dudes like that guy. They always make my skin crawl. (It shouldn't shock you, too, that the area I grew up in has a number of questionable cults. All run by guys like that. Some are in jail like him, too!)
from jimbostaxi :
Loved the “eat a brownie” joke.
from linguafranca :
I hear you can make friends on some thingy called Grindr
from whystinger :
So now I see it should have been a beer instead... I have thought of joining the Elks, Moose, Masons or something else. I still may. BTW, the local Elks club calls their wives "Does." I would guess so they stay out od trouble.
from whystinger :
Awesome coffee Danger!
from raven72d :
Hmmm... I'm a carnivore, so I like my pizza with lots of meat toppings. But what is your version of the Best Pizza? I may have to try something new.
from raven72d :
Now my goal is to find the book where Wolfe got the original line.
from raven72d :
I do appreciate the good wishes!
from raven72d :
Wait now...a first cell phone in 2022? That, mon ami, is seriously old school! I thought I was old school for still having a landline as well as an iPhone! My latest landline number dates back to c. 2007, and it was changed from the number I had for yet another dozen years before that.
from raven72d :
Beltane is always a favourite holiday!
from fairygodmum :
Wow... good to read you again.. been quite some time... hope all is well with New Wifey... umm... New Wifey been new for past 15 years now? :)
from raven72d :
And how is spring beginning?
from raven72d :
Meatloaf is a dangerous and risky thing. Far too easy to have it go dry as old tree bark! I try to walk the borderline between large hamburger steak and small meatloaf...and use lots of gravy.
from mhscutie05 :
That is a lot of work for a simple picture of outside. You could have waited a few hours till your Irish minx had to go to the bathroom, and used the digested potatoes for your Mt. Russet, and her piss for your lovely splash of outdoor adventures! A random mindless thought brought me back here. Your hilarious sarcasm and wonderful story tellings is something I needed right now. Glad to see your still being a dangerspouse idiot! Knee surgery? Scheisse. Quit being a bitch! Lol
from jimbostaxi :
I should cook up a batch of Pasta Fazool and see if the grandkids like it. This way they might look back fondly upon it too. Thanks for the note :)
from jimbostaxi :
Man, when you said we have known each other over twenty years that kind of stuck with me. Jeez, that’s a long freaking time! I know I should put some kind of punchline in here but I’ll leave the jokes to you. :)
from raven72d :
I do like those photos.
from alethia :
I mean...you didn't specify who should be sending the birthday greetings, and to whom, soooooo...
from raven72d :
I have found some anime soundtrack music to be wonderful. The Seatbelts did a jazz piece for the Cowboy Bebop anime called "Road to the West" that's haunting and heartbreaking. And of course the Yoko Kanno pieces for the GITS franchise are amazing. And...hmmm...a c. 2002 band called See-Saw. I was always a new wave/electronica/ethereal/darkwave kid, so I do love trip-hop and Sovietwave.
from portlypete :
If it's worth saying, it's worth saying twice! I have no idea why this happens -sorry.
from portlypete :
It's not my age - it's the alcohol.
from portlypete :
It's not my age - it's the alcohol.
from swordfern :
Haha, your unique landscape is certainly... unique. The world is better for your sense of humor. And you are SO right. My kid(s) would be vegetarian(s) or worse as payback for my teenage vegetarian phase.
from portlypete :
Was it your birthday? Oooh! If only someone had said. Well, I guess there will be another one rouund real soon. Nice photo ;-)
from portlypete :
Was it your birthday? Oooh! If only someone had said. Well, I guess there will be another one rouund real soon. Nice photo ;-)
from littlesushi :
oh and HBD!
from littlesushi :
ty :))
from alethia :
Like, RIGHT now?
from jimbostaxi :
Happy birthday!
from raven72d :
And...Happy Birthday !
from raven72d :
I've found a couple of places here that are keeping Japanese whiskeys on the shelf, so that is a good thing!
from annanotbob2 :
Damn, missed it x
from jarofporter :
i refuse on principle... ;-)
from swordfern :
Happy Birthday?!
from aryssa90 :
BIRTHDAY GREETINGS!
from whystinger :
Happy birthday
from peggypenny :
Beautiful new cat. I'm baking half sugars now, gave up on gurd. Cherry chocolate muffins, so good. Hi to wifey2 Glad covid taking it easy on you. Take Risks and be safe. Send recipes, covid is boring as heck. Peggy Penny
from alethia :
Even worse than a Karen, I'm a MILLENNIAL. I'm spending my 60 hour work weeks destroying the <insert random object> industry. Muahahahaha!!! And yet, I still can't afford a house to live in...
from alethia :
Hahaha. I put on my big girl panties and used my adult words. First I had to wait until my TERRIBLE WHITE HOT FURY subsided (which actually took more than a week; I can get into quite a temper sometimes), then I pointed out how badly the counter was organized, proposed a specific reorganization that would satisfy everyone, and pointed out the problems with keeping my 3,000 pound mixer in an overhead place. I also talked to my other roommate ahead of time to make sure he was on my side. Words, they do stuff! Sometimes...(I feel like I also need to point out I work a standard 60 hour week. So I'm really not sure where this lazy thing is coming in...)
from portlypete :
I am still here in spirit - and when I say "spirit" I choose my words carefully.
from portlypete :
I loved the pic of you and the cat holding paws. You're both male aren't you? Just checking.
from kelsi :
Nice looking cat!
from integrating :
Nope, I am not getting notified of notes. I'm going to check out Word Press. I added d-land to home screen. Remind me to update. Go Go Godzilla!!
from jimbostaxi :
Let's hope 2022 brings in the calm because I've had too much crazy already. Thanks for the note! :)
from raven72d :
Good to see you posting again.
from misfitstray :
Glad to see you writing again. Welcome back and I see that the Grinch-hat is still in existence. :) Here's a scientific study-article for medicinal smoke https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17913417/ I think burning incenses helps a lot to clean the air and energies of a room. Our ancestors burned incenses too. Though, *shrug*. Besides it seems that it's super-in nowadays again. You should give it a try!
from alethia :
<3
from alethia :
See what I mean how it's a main in the ass to move?! It's like 300 pounds! Ok, maybe not that much, but I've lived entirely on christmas cookies for the past two weeks, and I'm an amorphous blob now. (No regrets.)
from alethia :
I knew if anyone would sympathize, it would be you. ;D (It's a 6 quart Kitchenaid in apple green; I love it so much.) Speaking of kitchen things, I've been assembling an All-Clad pan set for my friend, strictly from thrift stores. So far, 13" french skillet, 8" 10" and 14" fry pan, a fish pan, a covered roaster, and weirdly one lone soup ramekin (which apparently he's planning to make hollandaise in), has probably run me around $100. Maybe a little bit more. And that's in CANADIAN money, which basically doesn't count.
from integrating :
May you have a Peaceful New Year. :)
from integrating :
I know you started another diary or blog but I can't remember where. Diary land is so 20 century. Tempted to go back to Myspace.
from whystinger :
Merry Krampus and welcome to the TURP club... How was that Foley and bag? Those suck big time.
from portlypete :
Thanks for your note. Can you tell that I only post when drunk - which only reduces the window slightly. Cheers!
from integrating :
Hi! Surprise Surprise! Guess I'll make an entry. hahaa!
from jimbostaxi :
Welcome back, Big Kahuna.
from swordfern :
A triumphant return with a story about your penis and sandwiches. I'd expect no less from you, Danger. Merry Christmas!
from portlypete :
Nice 'nokiN' camera - shame about the subject - matter. Have a great 2022! Love to long-suffering Wifey (copyrighted or not). So glad you are fit and well again.
from jarofporter :
hey, welcome back!
from alethia :
*weeps foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*
from alethia :
My dad recently had to have the penis knife thing done, too. Except they stuck a LASER UP HIS PENIS. Which apparently worked well. I know this because he called me afterward and told me about it in great detail. You know what I don't need to know in great detail? ANYTHING TO DO WITH MY FATHER'S PENIS.
from aryssa90 :
12/22/22 OMG ITS A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE! I’ve been worried about you, turns out the worry wasn’t completely unfounded. Glad to see an update from you friend. PS, I’ve been practicing my culinary skills but making bread has been completely impossible for me.
from annanotbob2 :
23/12/21 Well, thank fuck for that. Been worried about you, very glad to see you back, glad you've got it spot on about the virus, glad you still have some kind of dick-like object to play with.
from peggypenny :
Yo Danger, I made up some recipe of a cherry glazed pork ribs with fresh blueberries. They were the bomb, immediately gone. Ha ha Stay dangerous. Peg
from narcissa :
11/21: hi buddy. Hope you're okay. Don't be one of those ppl who just vanishes, it always makes me anxious.. as i was reminded by your poster below, i *still* hope marn will one day update.
from nepenthean :
9/2021 Greetings! I have a Marn update! She’s frigging alive!! I ran into her on The Zuckerberg thing as we are both connected to an old-time diarylander. I nearly peed my pants. I didn’t ask about the spousal unit, but there is a bit of bad news. Her daughter died of cancer not overly long ago. I snuck a peek at her page and the yard looks like what I expect of the garden of Eden. I had the vaguest memory of talking about her in a note and sure enough, it was you. Hope you are doing ok despite all the current batshittery in the world.
from integrating :
Saying hello just in case you check your notes..... I made a word press acct some time ago but I never used it. I still have the "password", which was before edit, "asswoo". Thought you would like that. I will tell you my good news when I find your fuckin' ass. Holla! lmao
from narcissa :
March ish 2021, hello
from raven72d :
11 March 21 -- Hope you're not gone for good! I always like your writing here!
from shortst101 :
Hiya....been a long time....hope you are doing well. Love the hummingbird pictures.
from alethia :
2/22/21, Did I see your state just legalized weed?! Woohoo!
from annanotbob2 :
7/feb/21 Just popping in to say hello and I hope you are all well. Fucking wordpress, honestly. I'm writing here and pasting it there but no pictures as I can't be arsed to work out how. I really hope you are well - silence is scary in these times. Hugs
from raven72d :
11/Jan/21 --- Hoping things are going well for you.
from vxxen :
1/6/2021 yep I'm alive! And back in school! Got 12 more months! Glad you're alive too! Miss ya face!
from raven72d :
19 December 20--- Received a package last night! Merci! Very much appreciated, I'm getting good brandy to go with them!
from jimbostaxi :
12/16. Danger, Just dropped in to say hope you and the family have a Merry Christmas!
from raven72d :
07. December 20. Just got your letter. I hope things are going better.
from raven72d :
Saturday evening. It's been a day when I could breathe again.
from raven72d :
Fingers crossed for tomorrow! I'll be having a very anxious Election Day eve.
from swordfern :
It truly warms my heart that my writing is worth your editorial prowess! 👖😂
from portlypete :
I wouldn’t wish an untimely death on my worst enemy. But ........................... ... A man, who has ruled over the largest number of deaths per capita in the world, really shouldn’t be saying, ‘ there is nothing to worry about.‘ There is EVERYTHING to worry about when someone with such power can make a statement like that.
from raven72d :
Corgis are excellent friends!
from raven72d :
I was thinking today... I have no use for Trump, and while I'd never wish a death from disease on anyone, a guillotining on the lawn of the White House wouldn't bother me. But...a Mike Pence presidency might well be worse than Trump-- same policies, but less bluster.
from cocoabean :
I agree with the ploy theory... as for coughing on everyone else, most of those people were on AF 1 with him within the last few days... so its likely they will have it to, if in fact the orange menace actually has it
from anni05 :
LOL probably!
from raven72d :
Just got a letter from you in the afternoon's post! And sent one of my own winging north on Monday.
from peggypenny :
I set up my tv camera on tripod, opened the big picture window shades and sat eating popcorn watching TV appearing unaware of them while they could see the camera plain as day. The Sheriff came and saw the camera too, nobody challenged anyone on my watch. Ha ha All left in peace.
from peggypenny :
paid aggitators are here. They come with old RVs and new license plates. They park, 4 of them with their hoods open. They empty their sewage on the street and spark their auto batteries if you look at them like you are calling law enforcement. They are park 3 feet from the national forest in California. Across the street from my home. Telling someone that the homeless are sparking fires with their shit on the street to burn down national forest land for "territory" rather than the election gets you dubbed "crazy" as the paid aggitators. Not a joke. Pegstars
from raven72d :
Glad the card arrived. It seems like letters and postcards are operating on two totally different schedules. Postcards from here seem to be routed to Uruguay before going to anywhere nearby!
from alethia :
Ugh. You know I'm gonna. He does the sex so well, and I'm SO bored of porn. When are we going to get VR porn, so I can stop going back to my exes? Huh?
from integrating :
I bought a bottle of red wine, "Bitch" label. Drinking it out of a plastic Halloween champagne glass I just bought at the dollar store. It looks like a skeleton hand is holding the glass. I've had a lot of people reach out and give me some kind words and good advice. As The Who would say, I Won't Get Fooled Again
from swordfern :
hahahaha
from deadish :
**titters behind hand** i just laugh at my own situation anymore, so don't feel bad fer meeee! i am having fun sculpting dolls and watching stupid things and laughing at memes.
from blujeans-uk :
21/9 Ehhh??!
from notunique :
lol yes! that's definitely been the big consideration. I do have an original ps4 in the apartment already, but was thinking it might be a good opportunity to step back into pc gaming since it's been kicking around in the back of my head for a few years and I finally have the space for it. if the ps4 performance is good enough, it'll probably convince me to abandon the PC idea and just get a ps4 flightstick, but i'll have to wait until after launch to find all that out.
from deadish :
lawwllll my peritonitis treatments aren't over for two more weeks. daily infusions of two liters of antibiotic-laced dialysate for six hours inside my peritoneum YAY ('m joking, it is not yay to be full to bursting with liquid that has no way to come out naturally. sigh.) BUT anyhow.. i got infected becauuuuse i am lazy and i hate myself very much, so i was not perfectly sterile while doing my dialysis setup nightly... and that means inflamed-gut-sac. wow all i ever talk about anymore is dolls and illnesses. i am great.
from notunique :
squadrons! it's been since 1999 since a new star wars space shooter!! god i hate myself.
from realchild :
quar quar + insomnia = lots of movies, ha
from kelsi :
I'm just using my iphone camera. Yeah, I could do some toodling with that and I bought some fancy camera app to be able to do stuff, but I don't and won't. I could use one of my film cameras as well but... too much trouble. We'll just have to imagine how great this picture would be.
from alethia :
It's been good! The team is all very familiar to me, so it's a comfortable fit. I am back in the movies, yes, being super famous and awesome. The show is right up my alley (it's a musical!), and the showrunner is a guy I'm a HUGE fan of, so I'm very excited. But I tell you what I'm not a fan of: setting my alarm, and actually getting up for it. BOOOOOOOOooooo. Also pants? Someone shrank them all since the last time I wore them! That's some buuuulllllshiiiiiit.
from deadish :
oh lerd. this kitty is precious! PRECIOUS! and probably worth some money, if only i had been able to save the sibling and mom in the little set. ah well. sleepingkitty is my favourite thing from childhood. yay!
from deadish :
heeehee, a dismissive gesture from me just means "issokay". no worries!
from realchild :
quar quar is the suck. but I’m working, so. hope all is well w you.
from peggypenny :
Yo Danger, having hubby1 trouble with food. I need no gerd recipes. I tried one I found for orange black beans and it hurt hubby1's tummy and he had blood. Do you know any no gerd recipes? I do think no gerd is going to be the new no gluten. Ha ha Pegstars
from deadish :
**dismissive hand gestures all 'round**
from integrating :
😂 Dude, I'm stuck in a really bad movie...send help...and popcorn!
from deadish :
bahaha HOW DARE YOU REFER TO ME AS A GIRL. you may refer to me as a spacecowboy. **shrugs** i like singing in all range of voices. the "never gonna give you up" and "katayoku no taka" on my soundcloud are not modulated, btw. hahaheee.
from integrating :
How could a father do that to his daughter... that question has followed me around my entire life.
from blujeans-uk :
Umm... small. I have a lanky frame (is that a word in the States?) They practically disappear when I lie down. So no problem there.
from alethia :
Hahahaha. I misread that as 'skip angrily through the woods', and honestly, it still works. You might need to switch to jeggings, what with all the jeans-splitting you've been doing...
from kelsi :
Ha! Ha ha, the thumbnails! Until recently, I webmastered for a local thingamajig that used wordpress and those blocks and also their pseudo-code are so antithetical to my '90s self-taught html that I can't even deal. wysiwyg my butt. Ha ha, though.
from raven72d :
There's also kimchi nabe, Hokkaido kimchi hot pot. It's cold in Sapporo, so hot/spicy is appreciated come wintertime.
from linguafranca :
Oh I suppose you could swing by my IG if you like for the family-friendly photos...@JoannaLynnTaylor. Shoot me an email if you’re interested in seeing the pervert pics (which are probably the more interesting work in several different ways at once).
from raven72d :
Hokkaido local tastes run to very, very spicy. They do kimchi there as well as very spicy ramen and miso. I keep wondering how Tony Chachere's seasonings would sell there.
from jimbostaxi :
I am thinking of something so obscenely expensive that I have to sell a kidney just to pay the check. A place where someone like myself will be told ”I'm sorry you have no reservation” even though I made it 3 weeks in advance. Thanks for the bday note!
from strawberrri :
I need to drink me some Cigare Volant! I have seen actual crop circles before, near my mum's house in 2006, but I don't think anyone got arrested because it wasn't a vineyard - those UFOs could sleep easy that day.
from raven72d :
"Road to the West" from the Cowboy Bebop OST is a major favorite song for me.
from raven72d :
I'd like to see the Disney film. Small corgis are quite wonderful-- see little Ein in the 'Cowboy Bebop' series.
from jimbostaxi :
Danger, thanks for the note! Crossing my fingers and hoping for the best.
from raven72d :
Thanks! I will stay safe. No hurricane parties, no unnecessary driving.
from peggypenny :
I don't know 'bout you Danga' But this civil unrest game is too dangerous. You know? How you and wifee2? Here had a bad public happening. Basic Mayham here, yes. Sailor take warning. Red Skies by Morning.
from raven72d :
22 Aug. 20--- Hope you're doing well.
from blujeans-uk :
Ehh.. in some respects.
from theshivers :
I am in Northern California - where it is generally nice and moderate except for about 1-2 weeks out of the year. Anyway, the temps are better but now we have wildfires and the air is ash so *shrugs*.
from deadish :
bahaha i wish to hell i could transition, but that costs a good bit of money. so booh. i *did* see your hummingbird photos, they are lovely. i like the single-wing photo the best. ah, i used to know so many people on this site, but now they have all moved on to hopefully greener pastures. nobody in my old buddylist was there anymore! crycrycry. well, well. that statement is two deep.
from deadish :
howdy,doody. i have no idea who you are, but YAY SOMEBODY VISITED MY DLAND DIARY. yay. i started this bitch 20 years ago, no wait... even before then. i was "kat0nine" in 99. have always loved dear andrew and his nice site, so. i thought i would start the abandonment of facebook and come back. see you in the funny pages! (look, i made a pun there.)
from misfitstray :
Thanks for your message. But you only crossed 11 fingers for me. That's why I didn't win the lottery. Man! If it would have been 10 or 11 I would have won...
from nineofswords :
Thanks, friend. ::smooch::
from nineofswords :
Hey... you made a harmless comment that made me realize that the purpose of my blog has changed, but my old pattern of complaining in here has persisted. I'm a happy heifer. It was an unconscious thing I was doing and now I've had a realization. I am still going to bitch aplenty because those happenings are notable in my mind, but I plan to come write when things are great, too. Maybe share more of the happy little happenings in my world, because I'm missing opportunities here to reveal whole spectrum and not just a part. I appreciate you saying that I should not change a thing, but I'm really changing a thing I think needs changing and I'm happy about it! You are a good guy.
from swordfern :
hahhahahahah. satire, sadly yes, but based on a true recommendation from the BC Centre for Disease control. oh - and I have been pondering at depth your comment about "spontaneous regeneration of behavior". this makes a lot of sense to me and has multiple applications. these things become embedded in the subconscious and can be triggered by seemingly random events. very interesting.
from portlypete :
Great pictures (the earlier ones). Red is your color - it so matches your eyes.
from strawberrri :
Utterly ridiculous response. Dirt and poop aren't nearly salty enough (so I've been told). If it's not twice as salty as the sea then it ain't Marmite! Ps. Vegemite would be an appropriate substitution but I've never tried it. It's the Australian equivalent. Fair dinkum!
from sparkle-pink :
!!! I always had a hard time flipping the crepes, didn't think to do it with my hands. Once these prepackaged crepes are done I'll give fresh ones another try. I have a great recipe that I love!
from swordfern :
lol! Related, the provincial government here officially recommends the use of glory holes during the pandemic: https://nanaimobeacon.com/gloryhole/
from nineofswords :
1. You have mad hummingbird photography skillz!! 2. This was a fun read. You make me laugh. 3. Sorry bout your fat feet. 4. Spongebob pants and a garbage bag! Bahahahaha
from strawberrri :
Please give Marmite another chance. Here's the recipe: a slice of bread, toasted. Spread butter on hot toast so it melts. Spread an *almost inperceptible* amount of Marmite evenly on top. Heaven!
from theshivers :
You're welcome! Also, such lovely hummingbird pictures! <3
from blujeans-uk :
Those hummingbird photos are amazing! I didn't realise you got them in the states: I thought they were tropical.. I remember the first time I saw one, on my first visit to Panama in my husband's grandmother's back garden, flitting around the flowers while I was watching from the balcony. It was like a tiny jewel. I said to M 'wouldn't it be amazing if that hummingbird would come up here' and a couple of minutes later it zoomed up, hovered about three feet from my face for a second or two and then flew off. Beautiful little birds. And thank you for your note re the mask.. it came out of the blue, I think it was the heat.. today was fine :)
from yellow-ninja :
Fun fact: Prof claims my diet is a "hummingbird diet" because, well, obvious reasons. Not for nothin' that my favorite food is marshmallows. And that my favorite hobby happens to burn sugar like nobody's business. But back to the point, those are some fantastic hummingbird shots! And that sugar water must have been HITTIN because why else would those birds have resisted the head-to-toe Lady in Red vision you presented to them?
from theshivers :
Re, separate checking accounts, mostly sheer inertia! And a dash of autonomy. I think we've managed to work around the autonomy thing as we both still have separate accounts but now things will be easier for our shared expenses. Definitely not a matter of trust :)
from kelsi :
Those are spectacular hummingbird selfies!
from wordwhore :
Thanks. We're supposed to have a family meeting about it
from alethia :
Yeah, she tells me she loves me all the time. I'm just the...show-don't-tell type of person. Talking about feelings freaks me the fuck out.
from jimbostaxi :
I got our notes back to normal! And I didn't cry once :)
from jimbostaxi :
Hahaha, I was looking for and old Blockbuster card or a coupon for your expensive steak knives. What do you give me? A swipe card and a membership to Splooge World deceptively labeled radio artists.
from jimbostaxi :
Well, to see your beautiful face! Why else? Lol
from jimbostaxi :
Your wife is very beautiful and you're a lucky man. What I want to know is how come your swipe card is facing the wrong way. Turn that bad boy around! :)
from whystinger :
Happy anniversary to you and your wife!
from nineofswords :
Happy Anniversary!! I'm amazed that anyone makes it that long and can still say "It's still magic". Congrats!
from yellow-ninja :
Happy anniversary, you two love birds!
from swordfern :
Happy Anniversary! Thank you for showing me what a good relationship looks/feels like.
from jimbostaxi :
We have known each other here for a while now and I know you don't do the sad thing. Seeing your note means a lot to me. No one here knows how you always took time out to speak to me when no one else would. You never had a mean thing to say and only heartfelt advice. I'm crying finishing this note but thank you for all those times and this note.
from portlypete :
Well, I had seen the pic of you broadcasting in your PJs, it was only the "Artist" bit that I had trouble with. Ciao!
from portlypete :
Well congrats to your accomplice for standing by you through thick and even thicker, and for soooo long too! She deserves a medal - make that two. Even more amazingly, it seems you are a member of the * * Radio Artists. How did that ever happen? Sorry, that may have been a bit rude. I should, therefore, add that she doesn't deserve you (take that whichever way you think best). If it helps: "A lot of accomplices are idiots", and I quote. But seriously folks, let's hope you can take her somewhere special for your twentieth, I hear Venice is nice: excellent food and very expensive. Happy anniversary! ps you certainly know a keeper when you see one :-)
from portlypete :
Thanks for the note. It was just a momentary dip. I have nothing to complain about compared to some.
from alethia :
Hahaha! Yeah, that's fair. The Switch is even kinda small for my meaty adult lady hands. But if you ever do get a Switch, come at me. I'll show you my island. My flowers are completely out of control, but I'm a boss at catching scorpions.
from alethia :
Oh yeah? Well, I'm a double bitch because today they were at 504!!!! I TOOK NOOK FOR ALL HE WAS WORTH!!! BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Heh. Bellionaire. Have you upgraded to a Switch yet, or what?
from raven72d :
For some odd reason, I'm thinking about corned beef hash.
from alethia :
I'm making lemon curd parfaits with plain yogurt. No ragrats. I'm okay, generally. Up and down, you know. I've been unemployed for a while because of The Troubles, but not spiraling the drain, financially. Looks like I'll be back to work in August, fingers crossed. I've been playing WAY too much Animal Crossing. My turnip prices were at 400 bells the other week!
from yellow-ninja :
My mom always made it with ketchup (very simple recipe, really - egg, oatmeal, ground beef, ketchup in the mix and on top), so it's basically what meatloaf is supposed to taste like to my Midwestern tastebuds. I was appalled when my old roommate RD made hers exclusively with BBQ sauce. Bleh. Prof tells me I'm lucky to have my allergies really, because without them, my trash tastes would lead me to happily eating nothing but absolute garbage.
from alethia :
I was at the grocery store last week for my Designated Monthly Grocery Shop and found a sack of lemons for half off. Anyway, now I have a whole vat of lemon curd that I don't know what to do with because everyone is out of flour so I can't make pastry. I'm just eating it with a spoon at this point.
from yellow-ninja :
Are you a ketchup, tomato paste, or (ick) barbecue sauce in your meatloaf type? Meatloaf is one of those things there are really no vegetarian substitutes for - one of the things I miss sometimes!
from muffinhead :
there is a note to you in my last entry :-)
from silencedsong :
I did! I currently live in North Carolina, been here since October. Life ebbs and flows, but we always find our way <3
from loveherwell :
thank you!!! :)
from kelsi :
Probably. p.s. I just made another loaf of your bread and this time added some whole grains that I'd soaked for a while beforehand and it's even fantasticker than it usually is!
from wordwhore :
I suppose that's one option. But I don't know that it is one I want to explore. Even if I disregard the distance, since I'm still in love with someone else, now probably isn't the time.
from raven72d :
I'm going to try. I read the whole thing once upon a time--- a test for myself one spring semester at university (which, yes, took me all semester). I have a set I bought to re-read maybe ten years ago, so I've pulled down vol. 2 and we'll see how it goes.
from yellow-ninja :
The bleeding eyes, my dream self assures me, are really just allergies. But more likely than it being the Kart, I think it might be that I'm studying medieval rhetoric in my grad class this week. It's miracle I'm only bleeding from the eyes. ALSO! There have been many Peach voice actresses! So depending on the game, NewWifey may be able to tolerate her again: https://www.mariowiki.com/Princess_Peach#English
from yellow-ninja :
I have discovered my new passion now that is school is out for the summer. So far, it's just sitting on my couch playing MarioKart while both of my animals sleep touching me. Could be worse.
from portlypete :
Thank **** they never invented Radio with Pictures!
from integrating :
Thank you.
from raven72d :
I sent out an exploratory postcard to see if mail is getting through. Mail service here has been a bit spotty, too.
from illusionless :
Sorry my entries have been downers, but it does help me get things out and process them. Things will bounce back. They always do.
from raven72d :
Check your mail--- you should have sometime arriving in the next couple of days.
from yellow-ninja :
Cheater! You can't post the same photo twice! It's against the laws of the Internet. Also, I hope every single one of those turnpike babies have horrible punny names. Why even have a baby yanked out of you by a cop if you're not going to get some ~mileage~ out of it.
from illusionless :
Your entries always make me smile, but this one 5/24/2020 gave me a big one! I never thought I could experience disgust and laughter at the same time. :p
from vxxen :
hey short stuff! hope you and the fam are ok. im doing well. be safe!
from strawberrri :
Things are fine here thanks! And we're allowed unlimited exercise now! Think I prefer unlimited crisps and wine though :p
from raven72d :
How's life? Do let me know if a letter arrived!
from kelsi :
I'm still making your white bread recipe however many years later - it's the best! p.s. I still don't get why someone would stay with friends and not bring their own tampons, and then make one of their hosts buy tampons for them. This has had me stumped for a week.
from wordwhore :
I've been making sour dough for years (we won'ttalk about how many). Started a new starter just before all the talk of quarantine and while I have no idea what my grandmother's diaper might smell like because we don't speak, my starter has never smelled like a diaper. HOWEVER. For the first time in unnamed years, my first try smelled of sauerkraut. I just dumped more flour and water and waited and the good yeast took over. That's the story of that.
from wordwhore :
Re: Whystinger below: My grandmother had a recipe for beer bread, my sister had it at her wedding. Also, you're welcome for the secret decoder ring. May it bring you as much amusement as you are seeking, instead of the boring ass shit I know it to be ;D The salad was not made of ice cream. But it was delicious. I think it's a texture thing as much as a taste thing. It has to be just right (ie bacon bits required).
from whystinger :
I would have called bullshit on you about the vacuuming of the small flies, as any bug gets ripped to shreds in my Hoover Wind Tunnel with a bag, but just so happens that several days ago, I used a Dyson to suck up a large wolf spider and was wondering how it looked either guts splashed all over the clear plastic or if legs would be off and twitching. Neither happened. Spider sat in a ball for a few minutes then got busy cranking around the Dyson. Three days later I took the cup outside and let him go, hoping he would eat some of the local mosquitoes. You will cringe - I sometimes make "cowboy bread" which is just mainly self-rising flour and beer. Makes a tasty bread! Stay safe and healthy!
from warpednormal :
thank you for the comment. I am looking at getting some help, I haven't really done it consistently enough.
from aryssa90 :
Alright I'm bowing to your bread prowess. The internet has been like NO HELP because all these bread tutorials are STUPID. So I'm on day two of my starter, just all purpose flour and water. And I think I was supposed to get rid of most of the starter except for 2 tablespoons then feed it more flour and water? So I did that. There seems to be some debate on how much of each. I don't know what Im doing. There are little bubbles and it's the consistency of really wet play dough. It smells weird. But I'm sensitive to smells. Please give me bread help, I just want Stuart (my starter) to grow up happy and healthy I'd be ever so grateful.
from yellow-ninja :
THANKS! And the cake was vegan :P (for some reason, when people hear "dairy-free", they just feel the need to go whole hog and cut the eggs, too). And yes, if it keeps up, I'll be calling my neurologist. I usually have 1-2 migraine a year, so this is def an increase.
from aryssa90 :
I’m not really sure if being into WoW helps with the whole being cool thing but I’ll take what I can get! We’re on starter day 2! I’m pretty excited but it’s hard to keep my house at 75 since it’s so freaking hot here. We’ll see!
from swordfern :
LOL!!!!!!!!! Cyndi Lauper. Nice one, DS!!!!
from strawberrri :
Time To Fly - one of my top blog reads EVER. The ode to the Dyson guy at the end was the demiglace on the...whatever demiglace goes on :) (I googled it thinking maybe it's sorbet, but the internet says it's a hybrid of stock and sauce.)
from blujeans-uk :
That bread tutorial.. dude.. it looked amazing! Any tips for those without a stand mixer?
from yellow-ninja :
Châteaubriand is one of Prof's Christmas gifts for his mom every year - I'm drooling. Even though we've gone semi-vegetarian over here. Kudos to knocking one out on the fly while knocking out flies.
from aryssa90 :
Omg thank you O Master of Bread! I was literally just talking about making bread today and had no idea where to start! Glad you and the wifey are safe! PS, I’m going to take a swing at duck confit in the next few weeks!
from portlypete :
I'm glad my joke translated into American - do you have any unbelievably stupid politicians in your country?
from raven72d :
I'm a devotee of Hydrox--- much better than Oreos!
from jimbostaxi :
Danger, Happy Easter! A lot of the funny things you said in the emails keep popping back in my head and making me laugh! Stay safe:)
from peggypenny :
Danger, how you doing? I stopped by your diary and read the pan damn it upset. Did you have to go off air? Our public radio went off. My love to wifey 2. Peggy
from jimbostaxi :
Hahahaha, that just made almost crash my car! :)
from jimbostaxi :
No death poems, no Imaginary cock posts there is no pleasing you. :)
from newschick :
i wrote just for you!!!! hope you are well... stay strong in that quarantine zone. and congrats on us being silver medalists behind new york AGAIN.
from alethia :
Right?! Especially because the two appliances they really want to hang on to are a bread maker and an air fryer. I hate single use appliances!
from alethia :
You have a blender AND a VitaMix?! You BITCH! I have one of them little bullet blenders, but I mean, it's good for smoothies and not a lot else. We just have a small kitchen, and APPARENTLY I'm not allowed to take over the WHOLE kitchen. Jerks.
from alethia :
In case I neglected to mention before, I'm totally jealous of your appliances. My roommates won't let me buy a blender, because APPARENTLY we don't have enough counter space OR WHAT EVER.
from jimbostaxi :
Stay safe my friend! Sorry, I couldn't wow you with my death poem but maybe you will like my next one called ”Ode To The Donut.”
from jimbostaxi :
Danger, I have two questions for you? First, where are your matching slippers for that outfit? Second, is that a Barry Manilow CD I see in the background? j/k :)
from yellow-ninja :
I. Will. Not. Apologize. (Also, everyone thinks they'll hate it and that it's disgusting. Until they try it.)
from yellow-ninja :
Omg, you're like Prof. He gets less than half my references, and I always have to explain the pop culture allusions in movies and tv shows to him!
from ninabean :
I'm much too old to remember how to put photos up on my diary. You'll just have to use that vivid imagination of yours!! Also on a side note remember that 1 ply toilet paper my husband bought months ago? Its literally saving my ass now so I GUESS I'm grateful now.
from raven72d :
I'm glad to hear things are going fairly well! I do hope you and yours get through this safely. Drop me an email with your address--- an exchange of letters would be great!
from swordfern :
Ahhh he was dancing in the apartment this morning! I was so happy to see that. Finally some improvement! And yeah, about the stockpile of food: I already ate all of my isolation potato chips. *sigh*
from aryssa90 :
You’ll be the first person on my list to call :p what was in your lockdown feast?!
from yellow-ninja :
You are the Wilson (Home Improvement, not Castaway) of Diaryland.
from raven72d :
Things are holding up fairly well here. How are you doing?
from strawberrri :
I hope working from home in your Spongebobs is going well! I had a 12 pack of potato squares and ate all four packs of the salt and vinegar ones in under 24 hours. Only cheese and onion and ready salted left :(
from jimbostaxi :
Hi Danger, The world has gone batshit crazy over the Coronavirus. I'm trying to keep my normal routine going as long as I can and hope it all blows over. Thanks for checking in :)
from yellow-ninja :
Congrats on your selfie! Leave it to you to take an art form from my generation and mix it with the sensibilities of vine and create an yoking masterpiece. You are welcome greatly for my incredible sacrifice. So many updates on my professor (who was nice! but docked EVERY. ASSIGNMENT. FOR. NEGLIGIBLE. THINGS.) continuing to give me As and harsh feedback, Prof and I spending most of our time at home in unwitting preparation for COVID-19 lockdown, and much weeping on my part about said lockdown (I don't get to go back to school until April 21st AT THE EARLIEST. If I don't receive and give a sick burn every hour of the day from and to a teen wearing better clothes than me, my ego will surely rage beyond control). I'll post our post-wedding engagement photos at some point, I suppose.
from muffinhead :
I can usually count on you for a chuckle, thanks for that, but I will pass on the biology lesson, I already think in worst case scenario terms anyway.
from misfitstray :
The spider could be a Boreal Combfoot. But I'm not sure. I liked the wolf pics better than you in the kitchen. But I admire your ambition and forsight to make so many trials. Well done Meister.
from kelsi :
Your kitchen looks like a nice place to be!
from yellow-ninja :
Those wolf pics are amazing! And yeaaaah, NewWifey is a wild one driving around the country right now. With school out for two weeks, I'm narrowly avoiding cabin fever while forbidding my beloved from driving back into the city for a bleeping computer charger he forgot in one of his classrooms. His computer is dead, and we've both been recently demoted to online teaching, but STILL.
from whystinger :
So Covid-19 is Mothra? Fuck, better call Godzilla to battle that mother fucker!
from raven72d :
They might deliver toilet paper for cash... I suspect that they're versatile enough.
from illusionless :
My favourite picture is the first one. The wolf chilling on the log. It's beautiful! Glad NewWifey is doing better. Glad you're taking the extra precautions against the COVID-19. I think people collecting tons of toilet paper are insane! Why?? Hand sanitizer I can see, but toilet paper??! ugh!
from muffinhead :
un: danger pw: spouse
from aryssa90 :
Thank you! I’m basically obsessed with that dish now. I’m hoping to try my hand at a scallop risotto this weekend or next! I’m also interested in making a low carb bread but I’ve never done any sort of bread before. I bow before your bread skills. How are you? How is your wife?
from barefootruby :
My wife also got me in to watching football (soccer, not football). But I got her into watching rugby, so I guess we are quits. After a while I worked out that the trick to enjoying a soccer game is not to think that it is rugby. Once you realise it is a different game it is quite entertaining. And that, I think, is a lesson for life.
from bridrinkspee :
ooo your wife sounds like a cool lady! Thanks for letting me know about the embroidery guild- unfortunately there isn't one near me but so cool to know that exists!
from nerryna :
i like the grass joke. and this works! (note leaving)
from raven72d :
My diary will be unlocked for the foreseeable future. If the aliens or Dr. Fu Manchu want to read it, locking it is unlikely to keep them out.
from illusionless :
E-mail sent. By the way, the reason I keep my diary locked is because I've had people use it against me in the past. It fell into the wrong hands. Because that happened I naturally needed to implement some extra security.
from eloira :
I have issues too if I try to leave a note using any link, except via the profile which seems fine... As much as I like the Diaryland home screen, I do not need to see it as often as it thinks I do... So, not just you!
from illusionless :
I haven't had any issues. Please let me know if my diary is among those you can't get into and I will send you the info.
from bridgecity :
Shocking Blue = Best Dutch Band Ever
from cocoabean :
Nope, didn't have to sign in to leave this.
from kelsi :
My password is *******.
from yellow-ninja :
Also, I've not been having any notes issues . . . maybe because you are amongst only a handful of souls I write notes to. I sent you an email.
from yellow-ninja :
You're not invited to the big party because I want you and NewWifey to crash. How fun would that be?! And in response to your assumptions about my willingness to publicly give myself over in name to my spouse, I give you something my colleague overheard in the hallway. From the mouths of babes: "Nah, I think we can keep calling her Ninja. Ms. Ninja wouldn't change her name. She's not that type of woman".
from nineofswords :
Happy belated birthday! I hope it was great, even with New Wifey's unfortunate neck limitations. Your still life photo is really, seriously awesome. It looks like an extremely realistic painting. Life, imitating art imitating life. You are all fulla talent, aren't you?
from yellow-ninja :
Belated happy birthday! I hope that table worked out for you two after all the tests had been run. Poor NewWifey! She's having a rough go of it. Fingers crossed all the tests reveal a relatively easy solution that doesn't send you to the poor house. And for once, I'm in agreement with you - your fruit still life is the best composed of the bunch. Great shot!
from portlypete :
Far too much info to comment on in that last post. Except, I hope all is well health-wise. Also, I liked your photo, but was concerned that you have black bed-sheets! If I were to be critical, I would suggest that a tad less black at the top of the photo would have improved the composition. I don’t necessarily conform to the rule of thirds, but judges probably do, and less head-room would have helped. I also appreciated the added interest afforded by the vivid green of the cut kiwi fruit. Definitely a prize-winner, but black bed sheets - think of the stains!?
from theshivers :
Thank you <3 And happy belated birthday!
from whystinger :
Personally, I am sick of health issues and am hoping for a better year. I think it will be so and I am hoping that I don't meet my medical deductible this year at all. Some years I met it by March and that was even after Honi and I divorced. Great pictures. I need to either pick up my camera again or the drawing pencils. I hope your wife fares really well and soon.
from misfitstray :
Yes, it would be possible to get a picture of that with snow, but the weather must be ok too. It's all about the light.
from jimbostaxi :
Danger, hope New Wifey feels better soon and happy belated day old man.
from swordfern :
Happy Birthday! I send healing energy to New Wifey; hope that the endless appointments come to an end soon. Lawyers last year, doctors this year. Who's going to show up in in the following year... engineers??!
from aryssa90 :
You know what? Forget that fruit basket. It looks like it should be on a brochure for some Napa winery. The old masters would’ve been proud.
from integrating :
Yes,this Saturday! It'll be a helluva lot more fun hanging at my new pad/crib. Casinos up and down Main St. Should I go man shopping at the casinos, or at church?..Catholics like to party. Well that was easy. Poor Wifey! That's awful. Seriously, have you tried crystals? "White power death metal" LMAO!! Have a fab day, dude. 🤘
from misfitstray :
I would have voted for your photo! Who would vote for an old fart with an apple on the head or an apple red and getting brown inside as it took so long to get the right angle for the pic. I dislike fruit baskets, especially this one with less fruit and more basket, though, your's the only choice that's left. :)
from elgan :
I have not given up on WP. I log in here about once a year just to make sure that my diary still exists and to update it, just to remind people I'm still alive. It's too much to have two diaries; I already have three other blogs: poetry, prose and knitting. But I'm glad you responded. :-)
from integrating :
Thank you. Making playlists has become an obsession. I'm on another social media. I created a page just as a way to keep the videos I find. Never imagined anyone would even notice it. I now have over 300 followers. LOL. Keeps me off the streets. One more week to freedom!1
from strawberrri :
Thank you so much for the note. Finding it brightened my day! Hope you are doing good :) xx
from jarofporter :
thanks for the b-day note!
from raven72d :
Ah, yes: the case law from 1977!
from jimbostaxi :
Danger, Hows those shingles holding up? It's too cold for New Wifey to do repairs!
from nerryna :
OW. hope NewWifey(tm) will be on the mend speedily.
from raven72d :
Ramona and Mercury!! Yes! Many thanks for posting that! (And John Foster Dulles isn't a bad choice)
from gr8legs :
you should be aware of my monthly cycle. i've denied you access for far too long. :) #1.12.20
from raven72d :
I'd tend to say Friedman and his acolytes. All the more dangerous because they cloaked their ideas in the vocabulary of 'liberty'.
from ninabean :
Theres a reason wolves wear sheeps clothing.. I'm getting rid of anything and everything wool... well i mean I would if I could afford anything wool. Quickest of recoveries to your wifey!! :(
from misfitstray :
Man! Why didn't you do the polishing with your hat? Poor NewWifey(TM). Wishing that she'll recover very fast. All the best to her!
from yellow-ninja :
Dang, what a confliction of emotions your entry left me with. On the one hand, NewWifey is such a babe in that wedding pic! And with all those trophies. On the other, poor gal all swollen and bruised and fractured! Good thoughts her way for a speedy recovery.
from aryssa90 :
I always knew sheep were the devil, hence my wool allergy. I hope she's okay, dingy underwear is never fun!
from aryssa90 :
Unfortunately it was only a brief hug as there were lots of other people but I could feel the heat in his touch and feel his lingering gaze upon my heaving bosom. The music was fine.
from yellow-ninja :
Omg, no. No children. Prof's mom WENT in on us when we were at her house, and I had to bite my tongue the entire time because he wants to tell her "at the right time". There's no right time to tell her I'm denying her grandchildren - ANYWAY, thank you for your kind (and sincere, even!) wishes. I, too, hope for the longevity and fun and loving kind of relationship you and NewWifey share. So far, so good! ;)
from raven72d :
A good Sazerac is a lovely thing! And I love how versatile sauvignon blanc can be. You're right-- it did pair well with the apple chutney. I like it with lamb, too. (I will admit that I've looked round my flat once or twice in my life, found only a bottle of good NZ sauvignon blanc, and said, well, hell--- I know I have a porterhouse cooking, but...adapt, improvise, overcome)
from misfitstray :
Wow, thank you for the shout out on the Mongolian Grinch Hat. You are mistaken about the green sheep that I allegedly killed and then stole the wool. It was a Mongolian Yak that I killed. That Yak ate a sheep and the sheep got green from its gastric juices. I then rode home on a pony on said green sheep wool and it turned out into the hat. Very nice to read from you again!
from integrating :
:D I already forgot about that, erdiot. Thank you! Yes, it's going to be a brand new life for me and I can't wait!
from aryssa90 :
Happy new year, you glorious man!
from integrating :
I just accidentally made a new word. erdiot. I get the *diot part, but... i dunno. Hope you guys have a great New Year's Eve and a fab new year. xoxo
from whystinger :
Got your message and you want me to send you what? No fucking way, it ain't my fault you lost my info or didn't know how to transfer. Fuck... Just kidding, I sent you an email and also read your how to on beef tenderloin. Good tutorial, thank you. I have been working with pieces of tenderloin and not a whole six foot piece.
from whystinger :
I figured that I would simply say hello, as the 800 number I used to use for fuck with folks has been shut down. Merry Christmas. Oh, I have been playing with beef tenderloin, have any great cooking methods or recipes? I found that my prime rib rub recipe goes great on beef loin on the grill.
from yellow-ninja :
Yeah, you're going to have to give me a minute. We just got back from our Christmas trip to the deep South to see my future in-laws (including his dad who sexually harasses me! fun!) to discover some asshole knocked out my car window while I was gone. Gonna take few days before I can type much more than expletives.
from kelsi :
Merry Christmas! Nice to see some updates from you again!
from gr8legs :
so weird. it wouldn't update to the latest entry. it's working now. maybe i'm drunk... #12.26.19
from gr8legs :
are you making updates? i keep seeing an april 2019 entry. #12.26.2019
from portlypete :
That last post really put me in the Christmas mood. Thanks for the recipes. TBH, I quadrupled the quantity of any ingredient containing alcohol and jettisoned the remainder. Still, I felt it needed more sauce. I trust you had an enjoyable Christmas.
from nineofswords :
Dear Dangerspouse, in a world filled with so much horse shit, there has GOT to be ponies! I'm still looking for mine. I know it's here somewhere.
from integrating :
Thank you! I know you would share your soup with me... I think it's cute you still call her New Wifey. ❤
from swordfern :
Merry Christmas! Thanks for the gift of TWO new entries! Glad to have you back!!
from raven72d :
Christmas morning-- coffee and archaeology documentaries. Pretty good day. And I hope things are great for you and yours.
from glorycloud :
thanks for the Merry Christmas-have a good New Year
from integrating :
Hi :) I just got this chromebook out of the box. Needless to say, I'm getting aggravated. :P I gave a bit of an update on my profile. Happy to be back, and Merry Christmas to you too!
from comebacktome :
Aaah but some of us come from countries where post doc study is free AND we have free healthcare. What's next the American's say, pet unicorns? To be fair our housing is completely unaffordable and ridiculous, so you have us on that... But thanks! I probably do need to update about it all, it's been a crazy year! I hope to see some epic photos of your Xmas feast in the next few days :)
from integrating :
Hi
from raven72d :
Just received a Christmas card from you this evening. Many thanks!
from whystinger :
Glad you dropped in for a visit. Figured your wife caught you in a compromising situation and had you locked down...
from yellow-ninja :
You're alive! Congrats on finishing your community service.
from raven72d :
Petrus and Yquem are always good!
from illusionless :
Welcome back! I wasn't fretting. I was more worried that something had happened. I'm glad you're both fine and well. I look forward to reading you again.
from raven72d :
Just found your note. Glad to see you back!
from comebacktome :
I may or may not have squealed with glee when I saw your name in the 'recent public entries' list. And you did not disappoint! I would give you shit for not updating in fucking ages, but pots and kettles and all that. Welcome back! Please don't leave us again!
from aryssa90 :
Dec. 21, 2019 ALL OF MY CHRISTMAS WISHES CAME TRUE!!! So glad to see an entry from you friend! I missed your thanksgiving breakdown this year. And all your other daily witticisms.
from raven72d :
20 December 19: Hope everything is well. Holiday best!
from narcissa :
12.13: oh hi checking in. Hoping that everything is ok over there and you're just too busy creating elaborate pies and making out with your wife to write about it
from illusionless :
It's been a long time since you've written. I hope you're alright and nothing serious has happened since your last post.
from raven72d :
Come back and write!
from mistfree :
11-26-19 Ummmm..... you alive over there? You have people who miss you and your 'rantings' Cooooooome back!
from mhscutie05 :
hey fart face... what's with no update huh??? lol
from jarofporter :
super-lame that it's been almost 6 months without an update from you. where you at?
from raven72d :
Waugh and Walpole! I do appreciate that.
from raven72d :
I'm unlocked and posting on my usual schedule. How is life this summer?
from nineofswords :
Well... your attorney friend got you off the hook (yay)and then you went radio silent. I hope all is well and you are just still celebrating, 64 days later.
from whystinger :
I am glad that your attorney or attorney friend or whatever was able to get the hospital straight. I have dealt with the Adventist Health System here, a not for profit hospital run by the Seventh Day Adventists. They do a lot of charitable work, but if they think or know you can pay, they will grab you by the nuts and squeeze... like they did to me. They fucked up a medical claim and refused to correct it and resubmit the claim, because I "didn't schedule a follow up appointment with their doctor and had made the mistake of over paying one bill. Nevermind that their doctor could not or did not want to work with me, so I got another doctor. I lost that fight, but found a much better urologist. Fuck them greedy bastards. The shame about Obama care is if EVERY politician didn't stick their dicks into the affordable health care act, it could have been much better. They stuck their collective dicks into it and made it 1,500 pages (I fell asleep at page 330). Why do we as a country think affordable healthcare or health care for everyone is bad? Beats the fuck out of me.
from vxxen :
your notes get my thru the day! I LOVE YOU FOR IT! LOL
from peggypenny :
First word I read is "Fuck" fuck fuck! Oh Danger, how I have missed you. Ha ha No seriously, what's up dude? I read you are pounding flesh. I landed on this new tye sauce. Man, I have it over salmon almost every day. Peggy
from yellow-ninja :
Hooray and huzzah for good lawyers protecting the little guy! I am so relieved for you and NewWifey! While I'm several days late to the party, I'm sure you're still wasted, so live it up! But not so much that you need medical help because, well, you know how that goes.
from comebacktome :
Jeez, way to guilt trip a girl! I do actually have a crazy tale of how I managed to wrangle my way home from the Phillipines last week, so I will write about that some time when my life calms down...so you know, 2021 at this stage ;)
from kelsi :
No apprehensions although the dude says the cops know him as "the man in black" so... maybe. It's all very cinematic around here.
from portlypete :
Just catching up: so great news about the law suit. And you can spell whilst 'rat-arsed' as well! Now who's the poser? I guess I'm far too late to join you in a celebratory glass of something but, what the hell, I can drink on my own - you probably noticed. And what is it about babies that means the mother has to stop blogging? Hell, they've got a hungry kid clamped to their 'comfy bits'. What better time to update? Anybody out there getting this? (You know who you are!)
from comebacktome :
Haha I'm boring, just work work work and then PhD work. I really don't think anyone is interested in me whinging about how busy I am and how I don't have time to scratch my arse because my PhD is consuming my life *shrug*
from shyest :
Hey!! yea I get to set my ISO which was 400 for the shoot. Its cool though because Im learning how to bring down the contrast and brightness. Thanks for the note.
from jimbostaxi :
I found a master at the Shaolin Temple! Lol
from alethia :
Podcasts are like...on demand radio shows, I guess. Though you working in radio may take offense at the comparison. ;) As for the wishlist (which I had totally forgotten about! O_O), yes. I own almost all of them. I think the only one I don't is the one on Commedia D'el Arte, because at the time it was like $150. But now it's down to $70...hmmmmmm...
from swordfern :
Congratulations! Your spreading of good karma came back to you in a most fortunate way - well deserved. I expect photos of rainbows and Ferris wheels now, not of lonely men walking along train tracks at dusk.
from comebacktome :
Huzzah! That is excellent news! Can we get back to stories of New Wifey being a badass, pictures of food, and random wildlife encounters now?
from mistfree :
So glad things worked out about the payment AND about getting 2nd place. Go you!
from narcissa :
congratulations! I'm so glad that worked out for you. What a relief, this country can be so stupid sometimes.
from alethia :
Also, if you like podcasts, you should listen to the episode of Hidden Brain called "Why No One Feels Rich". It's an interesting look at income inequality and happiness, and makes me wonder if there's some of this psychology at play in the continual blocking of universal healthcare.
from alethia :
Hahaha! It's so true! When ever I hear someone try to sling 'pinko-Commie' at Canadians as an insult, I just be like, "LOL. Yeah. :D"
from theshivers :
Thank you very much, x o
from blujeans-uk :
Well done to your lawyer! That's some Awesome Suits-ing there. Very relieved for you. Your country's idea of a 'healthcare' system is terrifying. You have my sympathy.
from whystinger :
Congrats on getting off from paying. Is this hospital affiliated with a religious organization? Where I live, there are two major medical groups that run 98% of the hospitals. Orlando Health and Advent Health, which was formerly known as the Adventist Health system. They are a non-profit health system that makes so much money, they have to build new buildings and find ways to dispose of the cash so they don't lose their non-profit status. If they have any inkling that you can pay, they will take you to the mat and crush you. They will tell you "we will submit your claim ONE TIME and even if they make an error in the billing or coding, you OWE THEM THE MONEY. They will squeeze you until there is no more... and they almost own the market.
from alethia :
FUCK yes. JEsus. Fuck the American health care system. I'm so sorry you have to deal with it. I was just talking today, with my pinky-Commie fellow Canadians, about how gross billboards for hospitals are.
from kelsi :
Yay, congratulations!
from jimbostaxi :
Congrats on winning your case!
from blujeans-uk :
Yes, it's how I met my husband! Our club spawned about 6 marriages that I know of >_< I also did foil and epee, although I haven't fenced regularly since 2011.
from yellow-ninja :
That is a wonderful solution, but gun people didn't even want high capacity mags limited. They can't be reasoned with.
from blujeans-uk :
Dude you did fencing?
from swordfern :
I just realized that you set my destiny for my next career. Steamy writing is for sure my true calling.
from swordfern :
This has become quite a soap opera; I am rather enjoying it. And there's more drama to come - Chris is about to reappear! Good call about the noodle stealing. I'll remember your advice the next time his chopsticks come my way.
from nineofswords :
Lovely pictures. :-)
from misfitstray :
Nice daffodils btw. Those dogs look insidious!
from misfitstray :
Package is on the way since yesterday in the afternoon. :)
from alethia :
I'd get off if I could figure out how! Every direction I take, I just end up back at the unicorn! I DON'T WANT THE UNICORN!
from swordfern :
Took your advice and got drunk on Friday night. Great idea!!! Also, I will now forever think of the daffs as dilling. I like the surreal glowing daffodil photo. Very beautiful, and I think that you captured the flower's dilly character.
from yellow-ninja :
So the first part of my comment: Uhh, yeah. So while we're not like officially "officially" engaged, we've done the picking out of rings and the about three sessions of the counseling and we're moving in together this summer . . . so provided neither of us screws up too badly, seems like we're probably gonna get hitched. Now for the SECOND: I' like to SECOND whoever said below they like the SECOND picture best, but the dog picture really did capture something - probably doesn't take those little brayers more than a SECOND to start howling at any darn thing.
from portlypete :
Hey Loser. You are SO transparent: you are just jealous of those hounds. It's Sunday here now and I'm very drunk - no change there then. Permission granted to join me.
from browndamask :
Lol. Not broke-ness, but broken-ness. Although I wouldn’t turn my nose up at a financial blessing, lol. Enjoyed the daffodil pics!
from browndamask :
Lol. Not broke-ness, but broken-ness. Although I wouldn’t turn my nose up at a financial blessing, lol. Enjoyed the daffodil pics!
from aryssa90 :
Wow, that second to last daffodil picture (not the one with the tree..talk about over sharpening ;) ) is gorgeous. At least a 3rd place prize! Just kidding, it’s gorgeous! Glad to see you enjoying this hobby!
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks for the note - while I was in there, scared but reassured, I thought of you and Young Wifey and determined that this has to be universal, because, fuck, it does. Definition of civilisation, innit - how you look after the weak. Up against the wall, motherfuckers. Hugs x
from illusionless :
Thanks for the uplifting words. I don't know what to say besides the fact that I'm not as selfless as you think. If I were then I would not be dealing with certain people the way that I am. I hope you and NewWifey are doing well. Have a good weekend.
from alethia :
What do you mean GO get drunk? I already AM drunk! :D
from illusionless :
Wow, again you are super duper talented! I love that one picture of the flower with the sun hitting it so it looks like it's glowing. Amazing!
from life-my-way :
Your photos are lovely and your yard is amazing. I always think you are wonderful and funny and want to tell you so, but I don't. Except for now. I did just now. Happy Friday, danger!
from misfitstray :
Where should I send the package? You still have my email adress?
from illusionless :
Congrats on your 2nd place win! That's amazing!! Cleary you have talent, so keep it up! You've got talent.
from yellow-ninja :
Why not both? ;)
from theshivers :
thank you so much for the kind note xo
from swordfern :
And yes, the ketchup on eggs thing is disconcerting. The regional explanation is weak for something so... ugh.
from swordfern :
Ahhh thanks DS!!! You know what's creepy? When I was having my first kiss I thought of you telling me how real lips are better than snow. And how you set my destiny to discover that. You're right - real kisses are spectacular.
from yellow-ninja :
How can an award-winning photographer (please, if NewWifey ever needs to introduce you to a group, insist on that as your descriptor) be afraid of cameras? You're better than that, Almost Miss West Virginia.
from narcissa :
4/7: I *love* that photo, it really does tell a story.
from jimbostaxi :
Welcome back! What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Joe Biden when he was told he had to have sex with Hilary Clinton? Can I give you a ,,,,,hand? Your welcome and have a great day! :)
from swordfern :
That photo conveys a sense of mood. Nicely done. And all the best on that other stuff too.
from stormysky :
Good luck with this gawdawful case. What a bunch of wankers!
from vxxen :
DANGER! HOW THE HELL YA BEEN?! you always cheer up a bitch lmao hope you're doing well!
from barefootruby :
oh, and as for catholic nuns - have you seen the film Philomena? "That is so fucked" was middle child's well-thought out comment.
from barefootruby :
Yeah, our NHS might have its problems (lack of funding, too much demand) but we never have to worry about how to pay for treatment. Mrs B was feeling unwell recently (nothing serious). Doctor appointment in the morning; bloods taken and x-ray in the afternoon. All cost not a bean. Sounds to me like the hospital misled you over payment for the treatment (accidentally or intentionally - it doesn't really matter). They didn't give you the full facts before you consented to treatment.
from aryssa90 :
Youve been missed in ol' d-land friend. Sending you thoughts of kicking bill collector ass and or winning the lottery. You're awesome! You'll be in my thoughts <3
from kelsi :
Sending you to collections without first giving you a chance to pay by sending you a bill seems completely nonsensical. Good luck!
from misfitstray :
I really hope that this law-issue will turn out good for your side. I'll keep my fingers crossed. US-Health-System totally sucks majorly!
from swordfern :
Ahhh I've missed you so much!! Sending my atheist prayers that the law works out in your favour.
from jarofporter :
sorry to hear about the legal troubles, hope it turns out alright!
from portlypete :
I could never understand why 'Obamacare' has got such a bad press in Trumpville. To us Brit's, it seems like a no-brainer that a caring(?) state should look after its citizens when they are at their lowest ebb (e.g. seriously ill). Granted, our current government has a few qualms about footing the bill, but assures us that "The NHS is safe in our hands" - so that's OK: they haven't said the same about Brexit yet! Re your other news, life in you home must be sooooooo +ooo dull: I don't really understand why you bother to post. However, I do totally believe everything you say about nuns - I have heard many similar tales. I put it down to lack of sex (but enough of my problems :-) )
from yellow-ninja :
Ugh, dude, I am so sorry. It's incredible how shitty medical institutions can be. When I got a procedure done a few years ago, the office neglected to send me a bill for some random nurse who wasn't part of the normal operating procedure. And then when I didn't pay the bill they didn't send within 30 days, they sent me to collections! It was wonderful and as it turns out, TOTALLY LEGAL. Fingers (and toes) crossed your lawyer is as tenacious as she seems and that your judge recognizes a total injustice when he/she sees one.
from yellow-ninja :
Had a dream the other night that you'd started a YouTube channel called "Will It Bread". No question mark in the title because "I know it will bread". Hope all's well with the surgery/cold recovery!
from nineofswords :
Yes... I came crawling back. And I will do so again and again. I did see the alpacas. They are adorable and funny. Alpacas (and genitals) are proof that God has a sense of humor.
from raven72d :
Hope you're healing up well--- and Pol Roger sounds to me like good advice!
from whystinger :
LOL, matching butts... I was hoping that you were feeling better after the gum and bone surgery. Sounds like you and New Wifey both had a bug too. I hope you both are over that.
from se7enchance :
Thank you very kindly. That was an unexpected, and very thoughtful, note. And accurate! I appreciate it. Cheers~
from mhscutie05 :
Happy Valentine's Day BIATICH!!!! muaahhhhh haaa haaa haaa!!!! You better be giving NewWifey(tm) EVERYTHING today!!! lol
from whystinger :
Hope you are healing nicely.
from kelsi :
I don’t think I’ll need to replace the radiator after all! But if I had to I’m sure my nose would maintain its impeccable matte finish.
from swordfern :
Josh is super! He gives me great hope for my future. And great advice. Kind of like someone else I know...
from swordfern :
I ate the stew while he was sobbing upstairs. It was beautiful grass fed beef that I'd bought and chucked in the freezer a while back. That was the hardest day. The climax. It will be easier from here on. I faced everything head on and with my full being. Now I can move on and heal.
from raven72d :
I'm currently locked, but let me know where to send a p/w to you.
from swordfern :
Hah! Nicely done. Your culinary talents are vast.
from swordfern :
Even more baffling considering that I was raised in 'the most Asian city' outside of Asia... they're good! I'm a fan. Wait - you probably know how to make these things?!
from strawberrri :
I completely agree! Breastfeeding apparently uses 500 calories a day. I use them ALL on chocolate items :D
from misfitstray :
I don't know how modern your TV is, but I downloaded the App "RakutenViki" on my TV. (you could watch it on tablet, smartphone, computer too) It's all about asian TV. I even pay for it... On RakutenViki you can watch almost every Korean Drama NewWifey(tm)'s little heart desires. Well, it's with subtitles, but I don't care if I could watch korean hotties and cry out my heart until I'm dried out like a 1000 year old mummy. I loved the shows (there are soooooo many!) "Goblin", "While you were sleeping", "Man from the stars", "W", "Encounter", "Just between Lovers", "The smile has left your eyes", "Dr. Stranger", "Where the stars land", "To the beautiful you", "Lawless Lawyer"... There are a few k-dramas on Netflix (at least on the German Netflix) too, where I began watching k-dramas, but there are too less for my big korea-longing heart. I loved on Netflix: "Misaeng", "Man to man", "Oh my ghost", "Black", "A korean Odyssee", "Stranger", "Bad Guys", "Cheo-Yong"... There really are too many to write them all. I cried the most at the show "Goblin". I couldn't stop watching until the end...
from mhscutie05 :
Hyar! Wishes are wishes. Don’t be a baby. Lol And you have no idea what kind of a beyotch I can be!!! >:D So congrats on getting older! :P Good lord, you’re a heifer! I’m sure a nice pillow case over your large cranium should suffice. Lol Hey! NewWifey(tm) can embroider something much more pleasant to look at than your face! MUAH HAHAHA!!!
from portlypete :
Having read your post about the operation, which sounds gruesome BTW, I'm looking forward to the sequels: Jaws 2, Jaws 3 ... you get the idea. But how lucky you are to have such a frugal wife, recycling cards is the way to go. On the flip-side, it must be hard living with an arse (beautifully proportioned, I'm sure) but smart beyond smart - Einstein smart. However, sex twice a <s> month </s> day must be some recompence.
from raven72d :
Thanks! Much appreciated!
from mhscutie05 :
Bwaahhhh! lol Happy Belated birthday! Must be nice turning 65. :P I love NewWifey(tm) so much more now btw!!! And sorry to hear about your face being de-bumped. Just know that it's more to help the world, so that you look less like a monster. lol Did you ever find a hat worthy of keeping that head lice incubated to your skull? lol
from whaleart :
I, too used to follow hissandtell. You're the reason I know she died -- very sad. Thanks for the follow; I'm thinking I'll be feeling at home again here; it took me a lot of tries to get in to old emails -- and this wasn't even the account I wanted back; I'm stuck with this for now.
from whaleart :
I, too used to follow hissandtell. You're the reason I know she died -- very sad. Thanks for the follow; I'm thinking I'll be feeling at home again here; it took me a lot of tries to get in to old emails -- and this wasn't even the account I wanted back; I'm stuck with this for now.
from nineofswords :
I have been remiss lately with notes you vagina blogging peanut butter pie maker, you. I don't know how I manage to forget to look at notes, I LOVE NOTES. So thanks for the notes. :-)
from illusionless :
Hey! I'm already a hottie. ;) haha nah I'm just kidding. Thanks for the encouragement. As soon as I find out I'll be posting for sure.
from strawberrri :
Thanks! Cosplaying would be a hobby for him I approve of :)
from illusionless :
Hahaha yes sir! Already started. Now I'm playing catch up with things I should have gotten done in January. This week will be a busy one.
from comebacktome :
Goddamn I want to eat that plum tart and whatever the little custard ones are! Also, happy birthday!
from swordfern :
I talked with my counsellor, the one that you like, about my fear of repeating the past. We talked about some ways to mitigate that from happening. We decided that a first date that consists of driving through rush hour traffic in the rain would be an excellent way to determine temperament. Thanks for the pep talk! :)
from raven72d :
Happy belated birthday! And I hope the hand tool oral surgery thing goes well/better. Also...how was Groundhog Day?
from swordfern :
Hah! Well-timed Groundhog Day reference. Dangerspouse warning duly noted. Comments like yours tend to haunt me... especially when I know that they are right.
from illusionless :
Happy belated birthday!! I read your latest entry about the wrinkled envelope and repeated birthday cards and I laughed my ass off! NewWifey(TM) and her mom are brilliant!
from gr8legs :
happy birthday!!!! 2/1/19
from swordfern :
You don't have a texting device??!??!!?!? (I asked him to not message me until I told him I was ready to talk. He has so far respected this.)
from yellow-ninja :
Dude, I LOVE that soup. It's sooo delicious.
from misfitstray :
I'm the proud owner of a fitbit for nearly 2 years. I've got the Flex2. It's the only one that works with swimming too, so I don't have to put it down for showering etc. just for loading the battery. I love my fitbit! I began felting your hat, but didn't come very far... so far.
from kelsi :
You're right, my dreams did predict the poop barf incident - I should have paid attention! :(
from yellow-ninja :
Also, if you haven't added potato chunks to your butternut squash soup, I highly recommend it.
from swordfern :
Happy Birthday! Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
from yellow-ninja :
Happy Birthday, Danger! Real bummer about the dental work depriving you of cake, but as long as it doesn't preclude your participation in NewWifey's new exercise plan, it can't be all bad! I'm cooking up a batch of your butternut squash soup today in what I'm going to pretend is solidarity with your mush diet (in reality, I just like that soup and am trying to, you know, actually eat food).
from aryssa90 :
You can’t even drink?! That’s miserable! Happy happy birthday! We’re glad to have you back, roaming the halls of dland! As far as the ice cream, I’ve always been slightly lactose intolerant and as I get older, it’s gotten worse. Unfortunately, Ice cream seems to be a huge trigger for it and whenever I eat it, I end up throwing up. I mean, I’m still going to eat it...just not as often. That was the first time I’d had it since early November. Also, you’d be so proud, I roasted a beautiful chicken and duck for my Friendsgiving, I think it may almost have been dangerspouse approved! I’m def working on upping my cooking game, I’m even thinking of getting a sous vide cooker!
from swordfern :
Hah, alright, I won't tell her how to cheat the system for the sake of you and her fortuitous idea for a teamwork approach to the problem.
from barefootruby :
I think the correct (truthful) answer to "does this make me look fat?" is "No; you're fat makes you look fat". Not that I've ever dared use that response.
from jarofporter :
You've got mail...
from swordfern :
Thanks for nudging me along in the last week. Your presence has been reassuring. Oh - and you can just chuck that fitbit in the dryer and let'er rip for an hour on 'fluff' setting. Who needs their mental health eroded for the sake of a few steps?
from cocoabean :
Happy birthday!
from ubermeister :
Haha, I used to know how to do it, but I can never remember what order all the href's and square brackets go in. I've always been more of a canoes and campfires type of a person.
from ubermeister :
Online, it's the Ray Mears www (him off of the tele box https://www.raymears.com/Bushcraft_Product/532-Possum-Fur-and-Merino-Wool-Beanie-Hat/ (can't remember how to do links, sorry)
from ubermeister :
Woihoo, and 10 point to me, I totally got the Zappa reference. Always been a massive Frank Zappa fan, saw him live on the Broadway the Hardway tour in '88. I know somewhere sells possum fur hats.
from ubermeister :
Thanks for the note. I didn't think anyone still read it.
from papotheclown :
Thank you. I am hoping for many more as well.
from jimbostaxi :
HAhaha you are 100 percent correct the delay was inexcusable. Please accept my sincere and humblest apology
from jarofporter :
Thanks for the note & warning. Fortunately, my chiropractor is one of the good ones. Since I started going to him, I haven't needed to go to the doctor. I used to go maybe twice a year for respiratory infections & such. I think I've only gone maybe twice in the last 10-12 years now?
from swordfern :
Hah! Here's where our paths crossed earlier in our lives, at least in spirit: I used to work in a breeding facility, matching up eligible male mice with pretty plump lady mice, delivering orders of mice to research groups, and then sac'ing the inevitable surplus. It was sad to watch the mice that were STITCHED TOGETHER not being able to fit into the enrichment tubes because of being, well, double-wide. I wonder how many folks know that their pink ribbon purchases are funding the creation of Siamese mice... and joy rides with dead monkeys.
from swordfern :
Whoa. Neat. You secret super power! Wait... you're not experimenting on me, are you???????
from swordfern :
Her advice was eerily (or maybe not so eerily) similar to what you have been saying that it made me think that you could have a successful side hustle as an analyst. Also: there's a man out there with an even temperament and a penchant for Pine-Sol that is NOT GOING TO KNOW WHAT HIT HIM.
from raven72d :
You have a point! Time to check out the Jupiter Symphony!
from swordfern :
Thanks for helping me see the dichotomy of where I do and do not show up with confidence. If I can stand on my own two feet in the middle of a man-strewn construction site, then I sure as hell can stand up to the man in my living room.
from jimbostaxi :
HAhahaha good one. I think his should be bigger he’s soooo violent that will calm him down lol
from swordfern :
Ahh, I love more logs! I want this fire that I'm in to ramp up into an epic bonfire so that I can emerge like a phoenix. Maybe I'm actually more concerned about shrapnel from his maelstrom.... ughhhhhhh. Thanks for the writing compliment, it means a lot to me. The me that you know here the rawest most vulnerable version of me, and it's reassuring to know that that part of me is appreciated. You write captivating stories and skillfully weave humour into your entries. I never know what's going to happen when I see your name highlighted in red!! Like the Brazilian Sugar Cookies... jeeeeezus, women actually DO that to themselves (well, each other)???? I obviously live under a giant rock!
from swordfern :
I agree with everything you are saying. It must be so obvious from an outside perspective, but being in the thick of heavy emotions and the responsibility of causing maelstrom in someone else's life holds me back. A part of me is begging for permission/mercy to end the relationship. Bear with me on the process here... I'm glad that you haven't abandoned me from boredom my working this through. You know what would really help me get through this? An alpaca snow globe!!!!!!!
from misfitstray :
18.7cm isn't really working for your hat-size if you don't have a head in baby-size. I would say it's more in the direction of 59-61cm... ? I looked it up (7 3/8) to be on the safe side as I couldn't believe that your head is that small. Maybe you mixed this size up with another bodypart of yours? ;)
from misfitstray :
ooook... I will give my best
from misfitstray :
as I'm not very familiar with US-sizes, what is 7 3/8 in cm?
from illusionless :
Thank you for your kind words. As the saying goes "Things come in three's" So here's hoping the tragedies have ended for a while! ^_^ Hope you are keeping well.
from portlypete :
So you sent me another note - damn! That means I have to reply and pretend I read your last post (who has an attention span that long anyway?) But said post did have the benefit of several pictures of NewWifey(tm). ****; how do you deserve someone that pretty!? Also, I discovered that you don't waste all your time on Diaryland, but fritter some of of it away on wordpress. Now I know you have a thing about alpaca. Who cares if they are dead (or just snoozing) - they can't run if you catch them napping. The hat thing is a worry though. Have you ever tried sticking your head in a bucket and filling the surrounding space with expanding foam? You could get someone talented to decorate the result- maybe stick a brim on it?. I am still trying to blot the image of 'a lobster roll and two crab cakes' from my memory! It doesn't trump a carrot anyway.
from misfitstray :
it would be no problem to felt a hat for, as I have tons of wool at home, so nothing new to buy for me. But if you don't want, well... Btw. you could name me "Babe" all you want. I won't sue you :)
from comebacktome :
Update, yes they do: https://mohairpossumstore.com/product-category/possum-merino/beanies-hats/
from comebacktome :
I, like New Wifey, love alpacas! I have picked two different Air Bnb's purely because they had alpacas on site. Alas, whilst I got to be there at feeding time, these ones were skittish. Clearly I should bring carrots next time! Look at you, teaching us stuff that isn't even cooking related! Now in regards to the hat situ, I can recommend possum fur/hair. I have raynauds aka shithouse circulation in my hands and my mum got me some possum fur gloves from NZ which were the shit. Legit those gloves saved me during winter in the north of the UK where it was -9C (less than 16f and enough to freeze your tits off, even mine!) and I was having trouble with near frostbite. Don't know if they do hats, but worth investigation!
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks, lol I know I’m way late but Happy New Year! :)
from misfitstray :
Thank you and Happy New Year to you and NewWifey(TM). I could felt a hat for you... :) What color do you like?
from swordfern :
Thanks, Babe!! ;)
from illusionless :
Thank you for the kudos on the weight loss. :)
from jarofporter :
you know, i almost put a comment in that entry, posted directly to you saying that's not what it is, but i new you'd figure it out eventually... ;-)
from kelsi :
No I haven’t soured on you, not at all. Yeah I think you minimized your behavior and put forth quite a few excuses for that behavior - but ehh. Your feelings were hurt, you felt betrayed, you wanted some validation to make you feel better, totally natural and understandable, right? And I wasn’t there so what do I know. I started typing a note saying such a couple times but stopped because... I think there have been enough 1s and 0s spent on this, yes? Merry Christmas yourself, Henry!
from catsoul :
12.27.18. Happy Snow Day going on here. Wishing you and the Mrs. a good time the rest of the year, and forever, and ever. Peace. =^..^=
from glorycloud :
Merry Christmas & a blessed New Year!
from life-my-way :
Happy Christmas, Danger, and a groovy new year to you, too.
from jarofporter :
Hope you had a great holiday, man!
from raven72d :
Merry Christmas to you and yours as well! Had a gift of Christmas gumbo today--- three different kinds of sausage, turkey and turkey broth. We're both pretty much unable to move here.
from blujeans-uk :
Dude I made the squash soup today (ready for Christmas lunch on Tues) and it's amazeballs! No opossum though. Bit hard to come by in this part of the world. I'd have to raid a zoo or something.. I put a bay leaf and a couple of cloves in with the butter and added some sage with the thyme. Could have eaten the whole batch straight from the blender. Also sorry about the shit you got dragged through. It's a fine line and I'm sure I've been on the wrong side of it many times too.
from strawberrri :
Thanks for writing such a cracking note, really impressed a few people actually read my drivel. Last year in the 5-month fraud trial I was working in I chatted to one of the defendants every day as we both got there early. On the last day, as the jury retired he said to me "See ya Babes" outside of court and I thought of it as nothing other than a term of endearment from someone I'd become friendly with (he's now serving a 7 year sentence in prison but that's by the by). Don't let these things grind you down - you are you and you're great! Loved the blue jay entry. Happy holidays, as they say in Americaville :) Hope you have a great one xx
from barefootruby :
Mountains and molehills come to mind. The problem is that because the witness made a formal complaint, HR had to follow it through because that's what the company's equality policy says. But did they actually ask the opinion of the person you called "Babe". In a sensible world, the witness would have told you that she was uncomfortable with the wording Then you could have explained that you and the colleague had known each other for years; this was the mutually accepted way you addressed each other; you wouldn't use the term for other workers; you were sorry that she found it upsetting; and that you would try not to use the term in her presence. I sometimes find it helpful to turn ethical dilemmas like this around: let's suppose it was a young male colleague who overheard you and then thought it was acceptable for him also to call this lady "babe". My guess is that you would take him to one side and explain that you can call her "babe" because you've known her long enough and well enough to do that. He hasn't and doen't so can't. No need for HR; no need for disciplinary procedures. Just a gentle reminder of what is friendly banter and what is impertinence or rudeness.
from jimbostaxi :
Thank you very much for stopping by my friend, things have been hectic the last few months but are finally calming down. I’ll be updating soon I hope you and your family are well and have a happy holiday!
from mhscutie05 :
You know, FUCK THAT BITCH! Lol I’m glad to see you posting again, but it’s sad that it has to be about this unfortunate incident you were dragged through. The #MeToo movement is great! But it’s the bitches like that over hearing little c**t who ruin it. It’s pathetic I think, I’d go back to HR and complain about her, ask why she was eavesdropping on a conversation between two colleagues. *rolls eyes, I really could go on and on about how disgusted I am about what you had to be put through. Bitches like that will get a random innocent guy in trouble, just so she can feel like she’s doing the #MeToo justice. She’s a tattletale, she’s not doing anyone justice. I had put up a post last year about a similar situation like that. Only I didn’t run to HR like a BITCH, I handled it myself like a fucking BOSS. Lol And that little weirdo never crossed me again. RESPECT. Keep posting entries and don’t go to the dark side. Lol I just downed my mug of espresso, so I’m ready to run a marathon! Lol
from yellow-ninja :
Do NOT get me started on the Christian Quitter who is fucking over her students during their junior year for no reason other than she can't boink until marriage, so she has to get married RIGHT NOW and move away to have all the Christian babies she can possibly have. On a different note entirely, a mantle full of severed dicks . . . hmmmm. Maybe something I should run by Prof when we start looking at houses to buy. "I like this one, honey, but the mantle can't possibly support all the dicks I've cut off. Perhaps we need more than a mantel - a trophy room, maybe?".
from yellow-ninja :
Oof. That sucks, all the way around, Danger. I have a colleague who is very conservative and Very Christian. She's overhead some particularly dirty joking between my dept chair and I, and every time she does, I think, "well, if she reports me to HR, I deserve it". Every year when we do the "Safe Workplace" training, I'm reminded that I say a lot of shit I probably really should not inside of that department office. In fact, your entry was a good reminder that even after she leaves at semester(because she's a HUGE QUITTER), I should do better about watching my mouth, ESPECIALLY when I'm "just joking". I hope you'll reconsider your stance that you need to shut yourself off from everyone. You're a reasonable guy and a feminist, and I'm sure you detest the company in which you'll find yourself if you go that route. Kudos for writing the entry and facing the music - it's a complicated, conflicting issue, and I'm sure you're going to get hell in the comments. But opening up the conversation is valuable, and I appreciate the approach you're taking in putting it out there.
from portlypete :
I started to compose a long reply in support of your last post, but quickly realised that whatever I said was liable to get me in trouble - which pretty much backs up what you were saying. Your first complainant needs to realise that quite a large proportion of the human race has breasts (I myself am cultivating a fine pair) just as they have arms, noses, spleens, navels etc. What's so special about breasts? In another conversation, the same woman may have defended the right of her gender to breast-feed in public. She needs to get over herself. In the second case, you might have got HR to ask the woman you were greeting if she was offended. If not, the bystander should be told to stop wasting everyone's time. Perhaps HR <u>should</u> publish a definitive list of acceptable terms by which to address colleagues. That would be helpful, and would give them something to do. Maybe, you should stick to conversations about cooking and, if you could convert to veganism, that would save a lot of confrontation too. ps I support #MeToo
from nerryna :
ouch. i'm sorry the metoo movement impacted you in an unfortunate way. i do think it's important that all these stories get told on both sides. it's a tricky road to navigate for both genders.
from shyest :
Merry Christmas!! Totally appreciate the note. Cant wait to read your note from 2022 :p
from whystinger :
Hey Babe, the White Dove??? Come on! regarding the other, been there, almost done that and thankfully, didn't get the Tee shirt. The #MeToo movement is very important and won't be derailed by some false accusations. There will always be some false accusations, but EACH accusation needs to be investigated. Everyone has different tolerance levels and some will use the system to their advantage, as Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein used their positions, to exploit women. Someone knew and looked the other way for whatever reason. I am a supporter of the #MeToo because of how many women I know that were sexually assaulted. We could have a long conversation about your entry, as there is so much to talk about, going back to the early 1990s. Yes, I was investigated over one woman saying to another (in a group of three) "I think Wyatt likes me, do you think?" Someone I never made a pass at and did not make comments that would be considered offensive. One was offended and went to Management and an investigation ensued. I wasn't written up, but it is still a mark on my record.
from comebacktome :
Ok, so from someone who was accosted in a supermarket recently, I can say with 100% certainty that I don't think you did anything wrong, and I agree that perhaps it could have been handled better. However I wonder if maybe it's the daily grind of the constant BS that you go through that has perhaps been compounding and then your comment has been the straw that broke the camel's back? The bit I think is kinda BS, is that it wasn't the person you said it to, but someone who overheard. This kind of offence on someone else's behalf is getting out of hand. If the person you said it to was uncomfortable and told you to fuck off, then ok, put in a complaint, but if that comment was returned with a 'not bad sweet cheeks' then I really don't get it...
from kelsi :
I don't disagree with anything you said, but I can't give you a pass here. They didn't tell you directly because you would have given the excuses you give here - you're a jovial guy! It's a friendly workplace! You've known each other for decades! You're a feminist! You say that to everyone! The young millennial whippersnappers just don't understand! But you don't hold that against them because you love millennials! - I'm not saying what you said warranted a complaint, at all. But diaries/blogs have a way of letting us lie to ourselves while thinking we're being honest (I mean, just look at me), and... I think you need to be more honest with yourself about this.
from cocoabean :
I would agree with you that those two "incedent" reports were ridiculous.. and they should have told you first they were offended, not go straight to management. Some people take all the fun out of work!
from raven72d :
I go through tea phases. But I'm fond of experimenting with teas, so I usually have three or four kinds on hand.
from kelsi :
Yes, you've destroyed me ;_;
from whystinger :
Wow, there are a shitload of your pictures there. I used to hike through Waywayanda and the Newark Watershed property, as well as the ski slopes I lived on. Where was the old nuclear reactor rumored to be? What about the alleged abandoned uranium mine?
from whystinger :
Gee, you live a lot closer to where I used to live than I realized. Love the piece from the newspaper with Vajayjay and flooding at Vernon Crossing. If I do get there to visit Vernon, like I have wanted to for a few years, we will have to meet and have coffee or something. The NJ thing was just discussed with a friend from Puerto Rico this week. BTW, I did vote at the Straus News site for your Vajayjay... Glad to see you writing here again. Oh, thanks for the note too.
from raven72d :
Aha, now! Arrived at home this evening and found a small package of goodies--- for which: many, many thanks! I'm dipping the biscotti into Orange Pekoe tea right now...and they are lovely! So--- the card and the cookies are much appreciated! I hope your holidays are going wonderfully!
from jarofporter :
wtf, a serious note? Who are you, and what have you done with DS!? ;-) Yeah, I get what you're saying. I do envy you your comedic/story-telling skills though! Anyway, I don't even know if I write to record what happens anymore, really, it's just more of a venting process. But how many times can one vent about the same things and have it be worthwhile? Meh. Feels like I can't even 'introspect' anymore. Thanks for the note, I appreciate it! :-)
from jarofporter :
maybe, but your 'trite' is clever and funny. mine is just... banal.
from kelsi :
Also, nice try, but I had hardly even worn that boot, and that shouldn’t even have come up in this discussion. But it’s typical drivel from people like you. Why am I not surprised. Good day!
from kelsi :
And my final point - not that it’s the last thing that could be said about this incident, because it is literally impossible to overstate the importance of the various subversive messages that were strewn throughout your “note” - is that engaging in such an activity as you suggest is beyond reprehensible and is indeed what has brought about the conditions we are facing today. What’s next? Burning books? Forced sterilization? I cannot fathom doing what you are suggesting and I urge everyone following you to examine - really examine - your whole point. What they will find, I expect, is that there really is none. May god have mercy on us all.
from kelsi :
And furthermore - not that I’m going to spend any more of my time on this, because that is definitely below me - but with your seemingly “offhand” remarks about one of the biggest corporations in the WORLD, you are trying to pull me into some kind of forced affirmation of their mission statement and I will not participate in that. How dare you even try. Good day.
from kelsi :
The last couple days I have been thinking a great deal about your offer to have an internet fight, and I have to say I am taken aback by your use of the word “jonesing” coupled with your apparently “casual” mention of my dog’s boot incident. What, exactly, would you have us take away from this? Are we supposed to interpret this as some kind of innocent coincidence? Or is it, rather, the result of a deeply troubling corporate influence? This is what is wrong with America today. The more I think about it, the more I fear for the future. Your offer is, at best, wildly ill-informed and evil. No, I will not engage in an internet fight with you, and I am disappointed that you would even suggest such a thing. This has shaken me to my core. Good day to you.
from bridgecity :
Always loved that hammock pic
from raven72d :
Eggnog is always good. And there's always hope for a pony!
from raven72d :
Thanks--- and how will your holiday season be going? And I always pay close attention to advice from Dr. Suess!
from yellow-ninja :
Also, not surprised they didn't change your caption. When I clicked on the link to the main page, there was an article titled "Tons of Wood". Seems like they know what they're about.
from yellow-ninja :
I voted, you attention whore.
from nineofswords :
Vagina blogger! I'm glad you are posting again. :-)
from portlypete :
Sorry to say, I struggled with the Vernon Advertiser website. I eventually found Vajayjay(tm), but, inadvertently, voted for a rather fine picture of a motorbike (may have been a Harley), but I didn't think you'd mind since I know you are a sucker for a big twin, Fat Boy. Even so, yours was an excellent pic. ps. I am truly envious of the view from your yard despite being a bit shitty.
from portlypete :
'1 1'? Not cryptic at all. I am training to be a Sound Assistant. In a few years, I hope to master that iconic phrase "2 2". Then I'll know I've made it! ... ... or, DL won't let me delete all my posts, so I had to create a dummy. Thanks for all the entertainment - you should be on radio.
from yellow-ninja :
Thank you! And thanks for the guidance! I am already looking forward to making/eating it again.
from yellow-ninja :
Duuuuuuude, that soup was so, SO good. I completely adulterated your recipe (no port or any other sweetener, used vegan butter, added white pepper and cayenne pepper, added boiled potato chunks), but it was amazing. We dunked sweet cornbread in it. Prof's butternut farts all night were worth it.
from mhscutie05 :
hahaha I watch a lot of America's Got Talent, and they replace Nick Cannon for this tall glass of dirty ass rank shit of a drink. lol I can't stand the fakeness that spews out of every molecule thats been generated from the diseased infested dna that multiplied into this talentless-hack. lol She should have stayed being a model, thats it. lol Anywho, how is NewWifey(tm)? lol
from yellow-ninja :
I was always more interested in your wife anyway ;) (also, I'm making a Special Needs version of your butternut squash soup tonight! Minus the opossum. Unless you count my Southern gentlemen and even he probably wouldn't disagree with that)
from raven72d :
I hope that the roof and the job and the cylinder all work out!
from swordfern :
The 'hot one'!!! But it's supposed to be about my accomplishments, not my assets! Hah, fine, I'll take the compliment. Especially the 'incredible' part. :)
from blujeans-uk :
Also, your squash soup sounds like an awesome way to use up the random squashes we picked up from the pumpkin patch. Minus the opossum.
from blujeans-uk :
Wales absolutely has beaches! (I can't work out if you were being facetious or not.. I'll go with not). Beautiful beaches, and cliffs and rock pools and mountains and castles! And sheep. I didn't see a single corgi. Are you sure you're not confusing 'Wales' with 'Buckingham Palace'? Easily done, I know. ..
from yellow-ninja :
Your assumption is correct. I'm going to marry Prof because I thought you were never coming back. But now you're back! Whatever shall I do? It's the Lifetime movie of Diaryland. ps. Your Bunny entry was top-notch. pps. Prof is obsessed with making Châteaubriand that I can eat, if that alleviates your grief any.
from raven72d :
I hope the holidays are beginning well for you!
from whystinger :
Glad that you dropped by... You have been missed.
from swordfern :
You've been my voice of reason for a long time now. A part of me wishes that I listened to you a long time ago. Maybe one day I'll be brave enough to take your advice.
from u-saved-me :
heya, yep the financial situation sure has changed for the better. Some days work leaves me exhausted and run down, but it's worth it to be able to buy the kiddos new stuff when we need it and not have cobble something together from a second hand store, or ask my dad for money. And now, because Im working, I might qualify for a bunch of different benefits, which is assbackwards, but that seems to be the way of things when you're dealing with government departments. If my health stays the way it is now, it'll be easy peasy compared to the last couple of years. thanks for the note and the favourite <3
from swordfern :
Oh! I'm so glad that you're back! And I'm damn sure that you are an entertaining man to meet in a hot tub.
from vxxen :
a) SO glad you're back an b) you and why stinger always make me laugh lololol love you guys lol
from strawberrri :
You're back!!! Yay. Will catch up when the bear allows me to :)
from narcissa :
there are a *lot* of rats in this town, so it's possible. In fact, your way is better because that means more dead rats. Welcome back!
from mhscutie05 :
Awwww!!! You missed me? Well isn't that sweet of you, cuz thats the ONLY reason why you returned. lol Thanks for making us wait so long for your return btw. Glad to see that you're doing well. You and your army bunny! As for me, my hobbits and I have finally stopped melting in the sun. Hubby is wanting so badly to move to washington, but I honestly don't know in my heart of dark hearts, if i have it in me. But we'll see. Thanks for finally updating!!! took ya long enough! when do we expect another return... 6 months from now? lol How about you tell us all about your plans for Thanksgiving and Christmas! :D
from comebacktome :
I know, right?! Ridiculous! And you are right, I know that it's not all men, but my doesn't it suck when one does do that to you (and it is unfortunately always men to women), and then another dude just watches. Like, what the fuck man? However, the positive was that the manager did take it seriously, and several men in my life have heard that story and been suitably horrified/upset. So that's how I know I have chosen wisely- with my boyfriend, and my friends, and also with my brothers who would not stand for that shit. One day enough people will tell the turds to knock it the fuck off, that the tide will shift. I certainly cannot wait for that day to come!
from kelsi :
I had given you up for dead!
from alethia :
Okay, my main problem is, I don't have a COMPLETE food processor. I have just enough pieces to be a pain in the ass. So when I see other ones that look compatible, I pick em up. BUT THEY'RE NOT COMPATIBLE!! Or rather, I've managed to assemble one with quite a good selection of accessories, but the main container is cracked and needs to be replaced. And I have another one, with most of the bits I need, but without the chopping blade and the pastry blade. (The pastry blade I can live without, but how am I supposed to make hummus without the chopping blade?!!) I really should just suck it up and buy the piece I need to make one complete set. But see, I'm a cheap bastard and I like going to thrift stores, sooooo...
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks for your kind note. I'm pretty OK mostly, just not always. Good on you for helping out your pal - I would suggest she does have something weird going on with her urine system unless that was poetic license. Gender dysphoria sounds so improbable until you meet someone - I can't say I 'get' it, but I know it's real. Hi to wifey x
from barefootruby :
A guy I know transgendered a few years ago. I didn't know him that well, but our paths crossed from time to time and we knew who each other were. When I met her post-change I was terrified of dropping some geneder-specific phrase into the conversation by accident and causing offence. Though I would also add that, like you, everyone I know who knows her has accepted the change. Comments like "I've worked with Susan for over 20 years" when, in reality, for 18 of those 20 years they were working with Paul.
from jarofporter :
dood, your reading comprehension sucks! i said you were a good guy, we all know you're not *nice*... ;-)
from raven72d :
Maker's is magic.
from comebacktome :
YAY, you're back! And with a bang...a least for the Incredible Hulk anyway ;)
from hitch-hike :
I wanted to see what was happening when I read, more than once, that people wondered where you had been hiding!
from jarofporter :
Wow, that explains the time away - good on ya for being there for bunny, too many people would've bailed. i knew behind that facade you were a good guy!
from stormysky :
Whatever happened to Dangerspouse? The wifey taking up all your free time?
from kelsi :
Vital wheat gluten is the answer! But you already knew that...
from kelsi :
I made your bread recipe but used whole wheat flour. It's pretty brick-like and I'm sure you have some admonishments/words of advice for whole wheat bread... right?
from jarofporter :
March. Fucking March? Post again, you rat bastard... you even missed International Talk Like a Pirate Day, ya scurvy, pox-ridden, odiferous addlepate!
from raven72d :
Yes--- don't abandon us! Come back and write!
from mistfree :
9-10-18 Dude! Did you find the end of the earth? Did you fall off? I hope you are out doing something fun at least.
from swordfern :
I miss you.
from whystinger :
Dude, where are you??? Did you abandon us?
from raven72d :
How is midsummer?
from mhscutie05 :
Did you forget your password too? I've been waiting since your last entry for this Vagina story. lol Hope you're doing well.
from kelsi :
Anyway, I made a loaf of your bread again today and it's fantastic as usual. <3
from kelsi :
Ugh, I wish I knew just a little more about you so I could do some skilled internet sleuthing. ("Sleuthing" is what fine ladies do instead of stalking.)
from alethia :
Hey! Where you at? I found TWO Kitchenaid food processors at the thrift stores and I need to lord it over someone who cares!
from aryssa90 :
Hope you’re doing well! You’re missed here on the old d-land.
from nineofswords :
Dooood.
from raven72d :
Summer of the Year Eighteen--- you are missed here!
from jarofporter :
WTF happened to you dood? You too good for us now or something? I always knew you felt that way... (seriously, hope all's well. stop back & update, will ya?)
from narcissa :
25-06-18: okay, where y'at?
from kelsi :
What's going on! Hope all is well.
from girl101 :
"Part of the Old Guard at DL, and much missed." This is how I feel about everyone on my buddylist, that when I log in, I see they "haven't updated in more than 3 months" and I miss it all, wondering how everyone is doing, wishing them good sex and even better friends. There are some things only a certain few understand.
from raven72d :
And how is spring playing out?
from mistfree :
Glad to see NJ is finally out of winter. At lest I think you are. Believe me, we had lot so of cold days too here in the South. But no snow. Always no snow. And THAT is why we live here. Now how about that tale of a vagina?
from annanotbob2 :
Hope things are OK with you, o silent one x
from nineofswords :
My daughter is getting a kick out of this texting thing. I could block him, but it has evolved into a sort of a family chat now and I am playing along. I don't hate him, I just find his sense of humor to be extraordinarily, painfully unfunny. He's just brimming over with reeeeeeeally lame jokes and it's my kryptonite. Most people take the cue when no one thinks they are funny, but he just keeps on for an extended period of time and it gets terribly awkward for me. I just flee the scene when he starts now.
from vxxen :
LMFAO! nah, hes employed lol actually, he got a promotion today lol crazy, I know lol
from kelsi :
I apologized for saying the awful things I said, not for anything else. No one deserves to be told those things that way, even if it’s accurate. I am not capitulating on anything.
from illusionless :
I can't wait to hear about vagina! ^-^
from kelsi :
That Blue Devil stuff actually works? I’ll have to look into that. Thanks!
from jarofporter :
hey, ugly pants for an ugly guy, totally appropriate! next, to find an even uglier butterfly-collared paisley shirt like this - http://www.b-k-enterprises.com/store/media/shirts_vests/puffy_sleeve_shirt_orange_green_paisley - or better yet, mr. furley! - http://www.plaidstallions.com/images/furley.jpg
from gr8legs :
yeah, you're right about mark. no point in wasting shiny pink nipple rings on someone that just wants to whine. #3/27/18
from swordfern :
Hah! You're used to all the fame, danger-RADIOHOST-spouse!
from msafire :
I had ten minutes left at the library and thought I could rifle off a really bad poem (I am sure will do that yet) OR just read an entry. I am glad to have read yours as, as always, you are a master at storytelling and always make readers' laugh !(Those who read on and are not offended by the lead. But what leads!) Leading on with vaginas? Well done, even more impressive since u are, well a man... no small feat!
from kelsi :
Sisters of the Perpetual Fist, ha ha. And those cardinals are beautiful! Welcome back! I’m as single as a 45” but - we’ll see. It might just be back to tearing off a bandaid very slowly, I don’t know.
from comebacktome :
I am displeased, you promised talk of nothing BUT vaginas, and yet there were none! I enjoyed the photo of you as a beekeeper, but still man, vaginas, where are they?? Humph.
from raven72d :
Any time! I do enjoy reading along with your entries!
from nineofswords :
Love the pictures! And I've never been this curious about vaginas before.
from cocoabean :
Poor little chickadee! Great pictures!
from jarofporter :
checked, polyester bell bottoms? I should send you my size so next time you can grab a few pair for me! we never get that kind of stuff in the vintage shops here... :-(
from raven72d :
Chateaubriand and making risotto in a hotel room! Wonderful!
from aryssa90 :
Glad to see you made it back! Even more glad to find it someone else listens to the Harry Potter audio books! Was it the one narrated by Jim Dale? He’s a peach. I look forward to hearing about the sea of vaginas :)
from nineofswords :
Hello slacker... nothing to tell? :-)
from raven72d :
"The Beekeeper and the Filet Mignon Debacle"--- perfect title for a book.
from raven72d :
Hah! Loved the frosting story! I hope spring is about to arrive in your part of the world and that things are going well.
from strawberrri :
I hope you survived both being a beekeeper and the filet mignon debacle. Great diary entry! :D
from ninabean :
You guys are so fancy schmancy. I need to invite you guys over where the only thing I'd ask you to make is mac and cheese.. with 5 kinds of cheese. Oh and maybe make some bread too... oh and bring the bee and beekeeper suits... and an open mind!!
from msafire :
Thank New Wifey for being such a great sport with you writing about her all the time! Crying I am laughing so hard!
from vxxen :
THAT WHOLE THING HAD ME IN TEARS! HAHAHAHAHA! AND I NEEDED THAT LUGH TO0! P.S. GOD, I forgot how much sous chefs bitched and moaned lmfao ahhh, I miss that lol good luck!
from jarofporter :
OMG.Just put the thinner cuts on the grill later. You can pull them all off at the same time that way. Gods' you're a whiner... ;-)
from disolvedgirl :
hi. thanks for the note. please forgive my poor memory, but did we know each back when i was regularly posting here?
from kelsi :
Yes I have been pretty sad and pathetic lately. Thanks for the notes. If it makes you feel any better I'll tell you that shortly after writing one of my recent sad and pathetic entries I saw myself in the mirror and noticed that I had a big spaghetti sauce stain all around my mouth and looked like some 3-year-old, or Ronald McDonald. Also: yeast flying around in the air? What! How did anyone ever figure any of this shit out?
from annanotbob2 :
Two can play at that game, lol, innit
from nerryna :
sorry for your loss. i remember those years when blogging friends really did became true genuine friends. your friendship sounded wonderful. and that is a very good joke.
from yellow-ninja :
It's such petty bullshit. But who would I be if I didn't make my petty bullshit make a national tragedy pale in comparison?
from kelsi :
Made another loaf of bread but forgot to add the butter. Still came out fabulous though. Thanxxxxx A+++++++++++ will bake again!
from musikoid :
What I do is keep D-Land locked and WordPress open. Also write stream of consciousness on DiaryLand and write more carefully with edits on WordPress, on a certain theme as I note you have surmised. You've piqued my curiosity about Barnyard though, and I'll get back to you...
from raven72d :
Thanks! I'll go take a look at our owl friends!
from musikoid :
Well, I guess you don't have to love me forever (at least not at this stage). Unfortunately, I've never heard of the Moog piece. Btw, I didn't realize you were unlocked, and just skimmed through your recent entry. "Of course I fell in love with her" was the most identifiable statement in the post. I'm also following you now on WordPress.
from raven72d :
"Owl penis envy" is the best term of the year.
from mhscutie05 :
haha Thanks! It's the new abstinence. lol I don't know what came over me, to be brutally honest in my diary... *looking forward to an update about V-day.* What kind of ridiculous non-sense did New-Wifey(tm)have to put up this time? lol
from musikoid :
Haha I'm like that all the time. I never remember what I last wrote in the profile. I think I'm quoting lyrics from the song "Our House" these days. One time all it said was "Musikoid in Orbit." Thanks for getting back to me, hope you're having a good day. :)
from musikoid :
Thanks for the agreement. Btw, I like your profile description. :)
from stormysky :
So thanks for your notie note. I'm not so much stressed as stuck I guess - and writing about being stuck is just - boring. I guess I may never get unstuck and that is okay...because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and dogonnit, people like me. :-) At least a couple people anyway.
from narcissa :
2/14- what a heartbreak. I'm sorry about your friend. Amazing to have all those entries to look back at your relationship over the years (i totally remembered that meyer lemon entry)
from mhscutie05 :
BWUAAAHHHHAAAAAHAAAAHAAA!!!! I guess your hairy ass arms and knuckles, not to mention the rest of your ungodly misshapen figure is the only manly thing you have against NewWifey(tm). Cuz she totally kicks your ass in everything! Lol Tequila you say, aye? Shit, shots of patron and a little lime and salt has almost gotten me into having a 3 way with hubby and a random STRANGER on my bday! Now THAT’S bat shit crazy. What have YOU done while nearly shit faced!?? lol
from whystinger :
I'm thinking that 1010WINS may have reached over to Rochester or at least Syracuse. Anyway, I do remember the name! Awesome.
from mhscutie05 :
Hey right back ya! Good lord… Groundhogs Day? Where the hell did time go? Lol And yes, the ailment has left thank goodness. It’s hilarious and then not so hilarious. Trying to get freaky while I had every orifice of my body spewing out bacterial ridden body fluids was terrible and more like a chore than anything else, so I just closed my eyes and fell asleep while he inadvertently took advantage of me. haha As for the hot load I was talking about, no, that has no happened. I honestly am still on the fence about it. But I have an interesting update coming soon. Lol btw, just read your latest entry, and I can say I wish I could have met poolie. She sounds like a woman I’d like to swap insult jokes about you. Haha. As for the Joke, I thought you were gonna send her all the seeds that came from the lemons she sent you. Lol That was a good entry in her memory. Thanks for sharing. Also, have you ever thought of shaving your arm hair? Lmfao Could be the next bread making hairless wonder! :D
from hitch-hike :
Thanks for the long-running joke and the memory of Poola. I used to read her in days past. It's quite refreshing to hear about the friendships and interactions borne through DLand. Sorry for your loss, too. I had lymphoma take a close friend last year as well.
from whystinger :
The other message I wanted to leave for you was about bread. I really enjoyed your recent bread entry and will have to go back and study it a bit. When I lived in NJ, I got into quick breads because I was drinking so much beer that I depleted my potassium and was on a banana diet. I had so many fucking bananas laying around, I had to do something with them, hence the banana quick bread. Years later, someone tells me about "cowboy bread" which really was a beer bread. Three (or four) ingredients, beer, self rising flour and sugar (was there oil too?). Not the complex, gourmet stuff you made, but something that was fast and satisfying for someone who wasn't a baker and fucking awesome fresh with plenty of butter!
from whystinger :
Wow, where to start? Perhaps I shall just split this into two notes. I need to go and re-read your latest entry, but I am so sorry to hear about Poolagirl. I used to read her blog when she was on D-land and had a few interactions with her, but not many. I was curious because I lived near a town that sounded like her blog name: Pooler or could be Poola with a little street in it? I am very sorry to hear about your loss and the loss of Poolagirl. I am saddened by this and now I am sorry that I lost track with her. When I started reading your entry, I felt a bit of joy as I thought, "hey, here she is." I guess I was wrong. I can't really articulate my feelings, but I have lost one or two very close blog friends and I was surprised how much it hit me. By the way, back when I lived in you know where, I heard Rick on the radio... I have grown (from seeds) a lemon that I was told was a Meyer lemon, but the fruit was as big as a softball, so it was probably a Ponderosa lemon or a Lisbon lemon. My condolences.
from stormysky :
Sorry about your friend. :-( You had me fooled there for a minute with your plastic lemon. I was like no way bruh! I love Meyer lemons. Luckily my friend has a tree close by.
from comebacktome :
Aah shit man. RIP Poolie, she sounds like a badass. I'm so sorry. I think this entry was a lovely tribute though, especially the worshipping of the lemons.
from kelsi :
Also, what I mainly meant to say was, thanks for sharing that. <3
from kelsi :
I'm not sure what the point of it all is - sometimes people say it's about leaving your mark and not being forgotten, but you look at any old graveyard and it's clear that of course we'll be forgotten, eventually (most of us). Maybe the point is the connections we make with other people or animals or places or seasons. Maybe there's something after this, or not, I don't know, but I do know that somewhere, in some plane of existence, even if it's only in my head, my friend Mary is still walking around Seattle with her dog at her side, and your friend Paula is still shamefully underappreciating Meyer lemons.
from nineofswords :
I'm sorry about the loss of your friend. Your entry is a good tribute to her. You transferred the essence of her personality such that I feel a loss from her being gone. ((Hugs))
from aryssa90 :
I’m so sorry about poolie. I’ve read her off and on for years, less so since she moved to Wordpress but I always loved her entries. It’s so hard when someone from here passes, it’s like losing a family member. She was an amazing woman.
from jarofporter :
oh, and http://www.unit-conversion.info/texttools/hexadecimal/
from jarofporter :
really sorry to hear about poolie. situation reminds me of stepfie's. you feel like talkin, hit me up, man.
from illusionless :
I'm sorry for your loss. She sounded like a one in a million person! I'm sure you and NewWifey(tm) loved her a lot and cherished all the time you spent together. ^_^ Keep that with you.
from stormysky :
Thanks Dangerspouse for the welcome back. :-)
from kelsi :
Have a friend coming to three of the shows but need to find someone for the Chicago shows. It always works out, usually meet neat people that way. Face value only, no scalping!
from nineofswords :
No one is cute enough to blow out my veins! No more Miss Nice Guy.
from narcissa :
spotify tells me yes, but i'm just revisiting the albums i know from my teens. I bet her new everything is amazing because she's a real live genius. belatedly Happy Birthday! Your shoe entry was hilarious.
from candoor :
Happy Birthday. If you are not still celebrating, start again. Dreams are only as real as we let them become. Time can be so rude. It just passes right by without letting us know. I must befriend time some more and carve out some to be here reading. All the food. A shoe calling out for mercy. Gratuitous butt shots. History lessons. Holidays. Brilliant T-Shirt advice (keep the Earth clean, it's not Uranus) and so much more. Much appreciation for your mote and wishes for my dreams to come true (it's slightly cleaner in the living space, or my standards and senses are wearing down, maybe both). I've been babbling elsewhere as I have for many years now, but still the warmth and comfort hugs me again here at Diaryland. If only there was more time. Sleep demands my attention as I have not given any in 48 hours. All resistance has been broken down. The ship is spinning out of control. I don't know how much more of this she can take, Captain. My work phone is a flip phone so I have beam me up flashback at least once a day. Sleep deprivation produces such wonderful drugs in the brain, if only it didn't kill the body. Nothing is perfect, not even life. I will be back, as long as I can. Thank you for being such a wonderful distraction and more, inspiration. You give me hope to carry on. I wonder who still cringes at that. Pizza would be good here. Cheers. :)
from illusionless :
Thanks for the kind note. I'm sure things will clear up. On the plus side I probably lost a bit of weight. Yay!! ^_^ I liked your entry about making the bread. I should try that someday. :)
from kelsi :
Totally gonna make some bread now, thanks! I bought some milk from a local dairy after momentarily forgetting that I hate their dairy products (I think they mix a little goat in - even their cheese is gross). It was on sale. It's gross. Was thinking I should use it for baking. I'll use some for banana bread, and a cup for this here white bread that you posted!
from comebacktome :
Fret not, I have regular yeast! I make my own pizza dough and have done for a while *hair flick*. I think I will try the whole proofing in the microwave thing- that's been the part that has stumped me previously. Obviously people bake shit here- there's even a whole franchise chain of people who are delighted to do it (https://www.bakersdelight.com.au). I will make this happen, mark my words! Like I said, I shan't let the miracle that was actual qualities and step by step timing and instructions go to waste, I promise.
from comebacktome :
Thank you. I am totally going to make the crap out of that one weekend soon...as soon as I can find half of the ingredients. Australia is weird and backward, as you know. Although, given I managed to get you to cave and actually time and measure out shit, finding rapid rise yeast should be a piece of cake ;)
from yellow-ninja :
I bet you do. At least you can always find comfort in your sugar-free pudding. That looked delicious, by the way, but I went 100 percent white sugar and sugar substitute free for about a month a few years back and ever since, the taste Splenda absolutely ruins a dish for me. It's soooo sweet.
from whystinger :
So I am cleaning out my freezer, thawing it and making rom for thirty pounds of venison and I find someone has left me a box of fillo-dough. What are some fast and easy things I can use that for?
from comebacktome :
Ok, the pudding thing is good. But seriously dude, where the fuck is my bread recipe?! Clearly I need to have this discussion via Wordpress. Ugh. You've changed man!
from jarofporter :
On the contrary, I think dream-jar is about as dumb as a stump & should have realized/accepted this years ago. Better late than never I guess. Thanks!
from tinea :
thank you so much for your note! i really appreciate it :)
from buffylass :
What a fun entry I just read. Happy birthday! And what a beautiful selection of cakes!
from illusionless :
Thanks. I have another gig in a few hours. Eating lunch and making a few phone calls first before prepping. I hope my happiness lasts as well. :) Hope life is still being good to you and NewWifey is feeling better after that horrible sickness. She's brave. I've done some risky things, but eating a real worm is not one of them! ^_^
from yellow-ninja :
I'm going to tell you what I tell my students when they are whining about how mean I am: My heart breaks for you.
from yellow-ninja :
God, you're so needy. I'll start liking your replies, you big baby. If I feel like it. I guess. ;)
from nineofswords :
Boot Destroyer Level: Expert. You did some serious damage there. Happy Danger Birthday!
from papotheclown :
And a happy birthday to you! I will take studious notes of all my indiscretions as a birthday present for both of us.
from yellow-ninja :
I kind of don't want to tell you! I like the idea of you thinking the comments are coming from two entirely different people, but it's really just one crotchety Midwesterner. But I will - it's S! The one with the Supergirl icon and the attached defunct running blog. Happy birthday, by the way, and many happy returns. I hope the foot is healing swiftly!
from whystinger :
Happy birthday. Boy, those two pictures sure brought memories of living in Vernon back. Bet the foot hurt, hope it is better.
from kelsi :
Happy birthday! Return those boots!
from aryssa90 :
Happy Birthday!!
from kelsi :
Yeah, I dislike most digital photo editing - it's like cheating. Thanks for the well wishes. It'll be okay, whatever happens. Hey, have you ever considered writing a column for some kind of cooking magazine?
from papotheclown :
As a student of church history, I greatly appreciated your last entry.
from yellow-ninja :
I commented over yonder as well, but I just wanted to tell you your entry made my stomach roil with sympathetic nausea. Bleh.
from aryssa90 :
Worms are probably high in protein so I mean, it's kind of the Atkins diet...
from illusionless :
Thanks for the luck! It's been a couple years since I've been a DJ so I feel like I'm sorta relearning the tech stuff all over again. :) I'll let you know how it goes.
from peggypenny :
Do you want a story to report and make money? Peggy
from cocoabean :
I vote for the orange, too!
from jarofporter :
pic 1 - all that orange kinda lends a 70's polaroid vibe to it, i think...
from illusionless :
I prefer the first picture. The original one you took and blue is my favorite colour, but there is nothing like a natural sunrise!
from barefootruby :
I have a spurtle (ooh, er, missus). It's the best for stirring porridge and sauces and such. Pleased to see you have mustard powder, not the jar of pre-made mustard. Burns Night his week - don't forget the haggis. And whisky. Especially the whisky.
from strawberrri :
Let's definitely exchange Xmas cards and acorn squashes next year! :) Happy new year, Dangerspouse! (Even though it's now 22nd Jan...)
from raven72d :
The scones were excellent--- I did toast them just a bit, but I loved the texture and flavor.
from nerryna :
i just realized you left me a note! Thanks for the nice words. Happy New Year to you and NewWifey :)
from raven72d :
Unexpected arrival today--- a surprise on a snowy day. Thanks! I appreciate it very much. The Maine jam looks great!
from yellow-ninja :
What a thorough comment! 1) Yeah, fever sucked, but feeling better now. 2) Hopefully, it's only Invisalign that returns, not the rubber bands! 3) Prof is the man whose affections I've been toying with since November. 4) No idea what K's problem is. Getting divorced really freed her up to dislike my personality. 5) I don't hate on radio, except talk radio. 6) School is great; kids are great. We're reading Catcher in the Rye (sophs) and Into the Wild (juniors).
from comebacktome :
I know I know, I am working on it! I could defs follow a pictorial thing. You also did one for yoghurt many moons back (less pics I think) and I have been thinking I should give that a whirl sometime. If it helps I bake the same way you cook- everyone craps on about chemistry and the essential nature of recipes= LIES. I just look at something and go 'needs more blah' or if I look at something and think it's fine I don't do something or I don't add something that is supposedly essential. I also rarely use butter, and instead use a diary free spread thing, so far everything bar banana bread works out awesome! Again, I think the banana bread thing is because I have tried to follow recipes, which I should know are useless, you just need Baking Mojo. Anywho, the point is, I should be fine with bread, just send me the damn vague instructions already ;) Also- what about the you tube channel with techniques?? I want some veggie ideas please!
from peggypenny :
Yo Danger, how's it going man? I saw you were on diary and thought I'd knaw at yeah. I haven't been cooking much lately, so I made my famous shrimp macaroni salad. Ohhh, it's a goodie. Sweet pickles, green and black olives, bay shrimp...
from comebacktome :
You are very welcome! Can I please have the bread recipe please? Thanks!
from ninabean :
Tf did I just read? I just came here looking for that bottle of gas you were going to get me.... now my queasy stomach is making confused sounds and I don't know if I want to run to the kitchen or the bathroom. Who am I kidding? The kitchen first, always...
from mhscutie05 :
What up DS. Holidays were great! I honestly got everything I ever wanted… yarn! :P I have a little old lady in my heart. Haha but Christmas was great. Family was great. The Half-lings were great. Getting laid, phew… I don’t think I’ve felt that raw since giving birth!!!!! LMFAO Good to see that you have survived the Apocalyptic winter storm of 2018!!!! lol
from aryssa90 :
Knowing comebacktome the way I do, it could really have been something other than drool ;) btw, she told me to read her note, I’m not just a note stalker. Even I don’t have *that* much time on my hands!
from comebacktome :
AHAHAHAHAHA, I almost fell off my couch when I read your note, I was laughing that hard! Agreed- cloning and hover boards, what the fuck Science?! (BTW that is a reference to an Australian song by Seth Sentry called 'Dear Science' look it up, it's hilarious). Sex has improved, it's mostly a solid 8. But I am also feeling particularly magnanimous towards him because he put together furniture for me on his day off today, and this has pleased me. I do need to do an entry, but I'm lazy. You better send me that link to your youtube channel though, post haste! ;)
from comebacktome :
Ok, so I had a brief hiatus and then had to catch up on entries, so here are my thoughts- 1) I love New Wifey. She is BadAss. 2) I seriously drooled on my keyboard looking at all that food 3) I would watch the SHIT out of a Youtube channel like that! In Australia Masterchef is super wanky and full of toss pots and drama. I don't want bullshit, I just want some techniques! Especially as I am always trying to come up with ways to jazz up my mostly vegetarian diet so I don't get bored. Could you do a channel anyway, even if it's just for me? Pretty please?
from alethia :
Nice use of the word 'dolor', by the way. It's rare I have to look up a word these days. :)
from alethia :
Well, to be fair, I only feel the urgent need to write when I'm feeling a bit melancholy, so I'm not surprised that translates. But anyway, what was that saying? "Life is pain, Princess. Anybody who tells you something different is selling something." Something like that. Thanks for your nice words anyway. :)
from aryssa90 :
If it were restaurant fare I wouldn't be having this issue to begin with! I did not buy a pressure cooker...yet lol. And yes, it is so me. Maybe pressure cookers would fix 78% of my problems while also representing 78% of what is wrong with me as a person lol. And THANK YOU! That's all a girl wants to hear, ya know? I spend a lot of time wondering how my tits look in things, they're one (or two) of my best assets.
from vxxen :
I. FLIPPING. LOVE YOU! THANK YOU! AND HAPPY NEW YEAR LOL
from aryssa90 :
Thank you!! So, presentation for crock pot piccata is like, a 0. Maybe a 2 in that you can kind of tell what it was supposed to be. Taste is like a 6 or 7. Definitely too much lemon although that's sort of a tasty error as I really like lemon. Definitely not as good as when made fresh and the recipe is followed but for an easy version it was fairly decent. I will definitely be hitting you up for cooking advice, you're like the guru chef of diaryland lol. Also, re: pressure cooker. I have a tendency to forget to put food out to defrost so then it's dinner time and I'm STARVING so I end up just going out to eat. A pressure cooker will kind of give me no reason to do that...right? Is there another cooking device that I (might) already have that alleviates the need for a pressure cooker?!
from moonbeams :
Just stopped by to say I enjoyed your photos of the hideous holiday lights and the chuckle-worthy face mask the Missus was wearing. Hope you're enjoying someplace warm now and the genuine cup of hot cocoa. Cheers!
from ninabean :
Happy New Year to you, the wife and Uranus!!!!
from nineofswords :
Happy New Year to YOU! :-)
from aryssa90 :
Men drive me crazy. I wish I could become a lesbian. At the very least, don’t ghost me! I’ve found that it’s difficult for people to think that I’d be interested in them as a person and interested in having a sexual relationship without wanting a deeper commitment.
from raven72d :
Happy Year Eighteen, sir! All the best!
from peggypenny :
Great entry, love the Uranus bit though I hate to side against wifey (2). I made my legendary Lasagna with 5 day sauce. Recipe? cook the crap out of the sauce. Drink the wine, spill no tears.
from kelsi :
Too complicated!
from kelsi :
As soon as I am assured that Andrew has fixed the diaryland I will sign up for gold again so I can host pictures here. Then I'll post pictures of the puppy, the new dog, and everything else! Until, you'll just have to use your imagination. Happy Holidays to you and yours!
from aryssa90 :
Thank you :) for reading my diary and being yoinknkw, diary friends for so long lol. It really doesn’t feel like it’s been 9 years. In some ways I feel the same and in some ways I feel so different. Time is really a funny thing. And I hope he doesn’t go anywhere but, you never know. In hope you have a wonderful New Years!
from moonbeams :
Hi! Thank you for your nice note! Happy New Year to you! Regarding my diary entry about atheists...the most succinct way for me to sum up my sadness about them would be to use a metaphor: It's like having some friends and acquaintances who are accompanying you on a long, long journey to a sumptuous banquet. The journey is long but the path is clear and laid out for many. But some of those friends and acquaintances drop off along the way. Some lose their way--they get lost and go off on another direction because they don't have a map or don't have anyone to guide them. Others get sidetracked by thieves who steal their belongings and so they're too busy worrying about the things they've lost and don't continue on the road. And then there are those who don't care about the banquet. They're quite content with the breadcrumbs in their pockets thinking that they can be satisfied with meager snacks. And all the while I'm thinking that I know we'll all be happy together if we can just celebrate at this big feast. Thank you for asking...I look forward to reading your entries too!
from swordfern :
Happy Christmas! Thanks for always making me laugh. Love the tour of NYC. :)
from aryssa90 :
Merry Christmas!! And that is one sexy tractor sweatshirt ;) thank you for your notes, sorry I’ve been such a slacker at replying!
from illusionless :
Thank you for the kind note. I am working on getting better fast and then I will visit my father for opening our gifts and eating cake. :)
from jarofporter :
nope, doesn't mean work all the time - i have tons of vacation time! :-)
from papotheclown :
That was a delightful romp through the city. I felt like I was watching Home Alone 2: Lost in New York.
from raven72d :
By the way--- Joyeux Noel and a fine Year Eighteen to you and yours!
from jimbostaxi :
Hahahaha thanks danger! Have a merry Xmas !
from raven72d :
Message sent! Many thanks!
from jimbostaxi :
Dear Danger, once upon a time there was a guy named Jimbo who was asked to bring two aluminum trays of food somewhere because the person who made them decided he had better things to do. Not only did Jimbo have to drive these trays 30 Minutes away and be there exactly at 12:15 he was told to heat these two trays for 45-60 Minutes add sauce to the chicken and mozzarella to the lasagna. The oven was preheated and trays were put in for about 50 Minutes the people complained food was cold do you turn around and blame the guy delivering it and followed instructions or the guy who cooked it the night before.
from muffinhead :
Funny you should say that. I happen to talk to my appliances all the time, even when they're behaving. For some reason I always walked away saying "thank you dryer". No idea where I picked it up but I'll blame it on the Maytag commercial. I think I need to find out where my dryer was made- I have found if they're made in foreign countries yelling at them works better. If it's American, I find coaxing and bribing has done the trick. I'll have to check, thanks for the idea, hahaha!
from raven72d :
That would be wonderful! What's your email?
from mhscutie05 :
Lol Thank you for the pic of your single pubic hair, the tryphobic pie, and that black pussy. Does your hairy little friend ever follow you to the bano? Lol
from papotheclown :
Short answer: nope. But it was still a good time
from barefootruby :
I used to have a cat that would arrive at my feet the moment I started to carve a roast. Before I'd got through the first slice the cat would be there. Somehow she could tell the difference between sounds and smells of meat coming out of the oven, meat resting, meat being prodded to check it's cooked, and meat being carved.
from barefootruby :
"This coffee tastes like mud". "Sorry sir, but it was ground this morning"
from whystinger :
I am seriously considering getting a nicer camera and seriously thinking of getting back into being a shutterbug. I did get a Nikon point and shoot, but there is just something magical about having to manipulate parts of the camera. I do miss that. I will keep you in mind and if things clear up, I will seek out recommendations. I have been very impressed with the camera on my various phones but would like to have a DLR. I cannot remember the famous photographer's name, but there is one who primarily used an old (ancient) Kodak Brownie. Merry Christmas if I don't get a chance to wish that to y'all later.
from strawberrri :
I will TRY to carry on being kind. I will also try to be brave in calling strangers out when they're being rude douche bags (depends how big they/their fists are). I have never heard of acorn squash (only seem to get butternut here) but congrats on the awesome pie!
from yellow-ninja :
Please notify Fox New re your local fire department joining in the war on Christmas.
from whystinger :
Someone said that you had herpes or shingles, anyway, I hope that is going well for you. I also used to be a camera nut and loved my Nikon FMs. I still have both of them and rarely use film now. I am thinking of getting back into photography and buying something other than a point and shoot. I must admit, my iPhone takes nice photos, better than a few of the digital camera I own. I need to get a DLR. Hope you are feeling better. Nice pictures by the way! New Wifey looks awesome and so does her pussy. Nice hairy thing. So that is the stray cat that wandered in, eh?
from mistfree :
See magnified pube (check) One more item checked of my bucket list. Yeeeah - no. And that picture of the snow? Looks like our cotton fields down here in da south y'all! So glad we won't have snow. I simply don't miss it!
from kelsi :
Yeah, it WAS my first time seeing the disembodied macro pube of a stranger. THANKS! I suppose next you’ll post a picture of a booger, right?
from nineofswords :
Awesome camera! You are a good story teller. I did not suspect that the pictured mutant sperm cell at the top of the entry was actually a pube. You should also know that I got a good laugh out of "nickles and foodstamps". One mo thang: Your wonderful wife might hit it big with that business of hers. My next door neighbors sell some kind of embroidery patterns online and it supports their huge expensive home and lifestyle entirely. Her husband quit his job to help her.
from yellow-ninja :
Hooray Midnight! So glad he returned home! Little shit, making you worry.
from yellow-ninja :
Oh, it's ok. I do hope he returns, though! Cats run their own schedules, and he survived for who knows how long on his own already, right?
from darktruth :
i just saw your note. i did change the batcode to get in, mostly because everything i write now is weird and sad!!!!! super cool!!!!!!
from yellow-ninja :
Noooooo! Midniiiiiiight! You'd better update me when that rascal comes home. I'm serious about this - I'm an emotionally fragile gal at the moment.
from kelsi :
I was gonna leave a note about photography and how the only digital camera I have is my phone and I've got all these 35mm and 120 cameras and people keep giving me more, etc., until I got to the explanation of the picture at the top of your entry and now I'm TOO GROSSED OUT to leave any kind of decent note at all.
from yellow-ninja :
Dude. Those shots are TIGHT! And Midnight is adorable! That puffy lil head! Also, you're gross. But you already knew that.
from papotheclown :
Damn fine camera set up you got there.
from mhscutie05 :
HE IS A WEIRDO!!!! I tell him every time he touches my feet when we’re bouncing on the bed. Lol But I guess that’s better than some other CRAZY fixations of asphyxiation. He makes up for it with his tongue. :P But FUCK THAT MICRODICK SUPERVISOR! I heard that he likes people who kiss ass to him. He favors those kinds of people. Well I don’t roll that way AssFUCK, I always let my work speak for itself. I’m not here to kiss someone’s ass. So that might have been why he moved me. This lardSHIT is so mentally unstable that he had a meltdown last year and just cried all day in his office! Tell me to ‘watch myself’ Bitch please! Lol Loved the pic of NewWifey(tm)’s ass tho on the ladder! lol She is a real woman! You lucky bastard!
from jarofporter :
thanks for the message. i really hadn't expected to write again for a long while, but something completely unusual happened last night, so here i am again. glad you got something covering your roof until you can repair it in the spring. be careful re: mold, i ended up with a fungal infection in my lungs from breathing it in. if you see it, clean it up before it spreads.
from yellow-ninja :
Thanks, man. It's a tough one.
from mhscutie05 :
Wow!!! You are hilarious sir! Lol Out of all the things Mr. Brown does with food, it’s the one thing he DOESN’T do with food that you hate the most!!!! Hahaha, I forgot you love them bikes. Lol You should have ended the note with, ‘Fuck him right in the pussy!’ lol Oh hey, do you still do anything with them bikes? How about NewWifey(tm)? *reading your newest entry after this note*
from catsoul :
yes I read the whole entry. I know she is Wonder Woman when it comes to fixing/doing things. Though when it comes to getting relief from a skin irration, she may need some help. What I listed there is used individually not all together, ok. =^..^=
from catsoul :
shingles home remedies are: lemon balm, garlic, baking soda, licorice, coconut oil, essential oils such as peppermint and lavender. You would have to look up the recipes for exact application. Oh, and drink lots of water. Help her man. Peace Out. =^..^=
from kelsi :
Yeah, NewWifey is seriously impressive. Give that girl an award or something!
from yellow-ninja :
NewWifey is a marvel. I want one.
from mhscutie05 :
lol, not a fan of Alton Brown aye? lol porque senior?
from glorycloud :
Christopher Hitches is an interesting writer. I often read books by people who I do not agree with. We miss Rudy, but he could not live forever. Death is certain for all of us. Thanks for the note-hope all is well-peace
from muffinhead :
Beakman's is back in syndication my friend, I watch parts of it on the weekend on my local classic tv station, be jealous. I like Lester! He's a kick in the pants. Masks help EVERYTHING even if it's just a little bit. lol re: Alton, I'll have to look up some episodes and see if I agree with your estimation, the few I watched weren't THAT bad!
from mhscutie05 :
Hahahahahahahahaha I must have been to tired to see straight!!!! 3 times!!! Holy FUCK!!!! I was wondering, what the hell does he mean by 3 three times. Lmfao
from muffinhead :
Whoa there mister, I'd say Alton Brown isn't the most attractive person and his show Good Eats (the half dozen or so I've watched) is pretty geeky, seems to me he gets closest to what you're describing, kinda like the Beakman's world of cooking. Still not convinced? That's what a Luchador mask is for!! Could be like that magician on tv wearing a mask revealing all the magic tricks....
from mhscutie05 :
Yea, I was just roaming the DL, and then I saw that… you did the right thing by cleaning your notes page. But I would have left it. Lol I like some drama in my uneventful life. It might be due to the fact that I don’t make enough homemade desserts. Lmfao now you say scones, if I remember right you made scones from shredded tea leaves right? Now I’m not one for baked pastries but for some reason it seemed oddly satisfying and pleasing to the eyes to read about. Now I might have to ‘buy’ some. O.O I’ve never made them or known someone personally who has succeeded in making pastries. Lol I can make blueberry pancakes! Haha If no Youtube foodporn channel shall be born from DS, then at least upload a random concoction of delectable treats created from the hairless Italian flesh.
from raven72d :
And...serious thanks! Good headphone info, and vur' much appreciated!
from mhscutie05 :
lame, nvm on that last note, I must have been 'seeing' things. *shrugs shoulders* Back to work. -__-
from mhscutie05 :
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Someone just didn’t have a bad day, sounds like someone is a conceded little *cough cough*. SMH, she thought you were harassing her! Who is the one throwing names and getting loud here. I thought I smelled something raunchy, and it wasn’t my panties! :D lol I believe you were asking simple questions, and it was obviously a bit much. Perhaps Canada is a better environment for someone who hates the ‘American’ way of life. Lol I just can’t believe someone throws their self around like that on someone else’s note page. Anyway, cooking up anything interesting lately? Question for you- What dessert does NewWifey(tm) love that you have created?
from mhscutie05 :
Well NewWifey(tm) has done you a good solid by sticking around. Lol But hey, you have the support of your dangerfans *snickers* if you ever decide to start a Youtube channel. You can never go wrong with foodporn! If your hands don’t look like your FEET, then I’m pretty sure you’ll be ok! Lol “The Breast Channel” is genius btw. It is totally Dangerspouse. HEY! Maybe you can use NewWifey(tm)’s hands! And of course her breasts. But you might be using your professional tongue more often for that. Lol But whatever you wanna do. I guess we can be thankful that you stuck around in DL to begin with. *thumbs up*
from mhscutie05 :
DO IT!!!! The YouTube idea. Sharing your knowledge and skill set to the world with just using only your hands and voice can be accomplished! You fondle food with your hands, and the radio with your voice it will be done! It's funny though that you're trying to hide your Italian rollicking shaved face from the world. HOpefully you won't be embarrassing NewWifey(tm) too much. lol So, are you gonna do it? lol
from strawberrri :
Oh you should come to my charity shop - there's loads in a size L! ;) Is it worrying that two of my friends separately asked if the secret pocket is for drugs?! Maybe that's not icing sugar sprinkled on the mince pies ...
from naomibeth :
YESS. I used to watch How To Boil Water and loved it. When I was a new young adult and didn't know jack, it was very helpful. I love your idea. And remember, Julia Child was not pretty, but SHE made it work. And Justin Wilson wasn't exactly handsome. But he pulled it off. I think you should try.
from chakra-nadi :
factory farming is the #1 thing destroying our environment. you can make all the excuses you want but you are either part of the problem, or the solution.
from cocoabean :
I agree with the ninja.. a ceiling mounted camera showing only your hands doing the work would be enough. And yes, it is a catchy title...
from yellow-ninja :
But think of the education you could provide! And thanks, btw, for your compliments on my Leeloo get-up. The wig did, indeed, take forever to complete.
from yellow-ninja :
That is indeed an obscene amount of food. I really like your YouTube channel idea! You can be one of those channels where it's just your hands and voice if you're really that shy.
from yellow-ninja :
Wow, that is definitely a sad Thanksgiving. :( At least most of those foods make for fantastic leftovers? (I say stuffing, not dressing)
from ninabean :
I was about to tell you my invitation to your thanksgiving pie mustve gotten lost in the mail but then i realized something. How tf are you not in my "buddy list" for updates? I now hang my head in shame and understand I deserve no such pie.. but you are now on the buddy list. Hope wifey feels better soon!!!
from candoor :
I can barely move. I think someone put a funnel in my mouth and poured in more food after I fell asleep to reduce the leftover pile. Once again you enthralled me with your adventures in everyday life. I suppose moving the computer to another room would be too simple a fix, so how about a scuba tank. The wet suit can protect you from the molds and you'd be prepared for the next faulty urinal. Personally I try to stay dry at work. My office is a refrigerator. People left they lunches in there to keep them cold until they got tired of eating only half of what they brought it. I wasn't greedy, just hungry. Besides, I had to make sure the food didn't spoil. I look out for my co-workers. Hope you and NewWifey(tm) get well soon. I assume you'll catch it since you can't keep your hands off each other. Sick sex is better than none. Keep breathing.
from yellow-ninja :
Always good to see your name in red on the ol' buddylist (I'm avoiding my wordpress at the moment - too many running buddies posting awesome stuff while I'm being a lazy bum). I'm really impressed you made it allllllll the way to the end of your entry before you made your urine pun. Happy Thanksgiving! I'm already envious of the amazing concoctions you'll no doubt create (even if my mother was seized by a fit of generosity last night and is making a Special Needs green bean casserole for me to eat all by myself).
from alethia :
HG Mould Spray. It's the best mould spray I've found. Kills and bleaches. (Good products are just the sexiest, aren't they?)
from nineofswords :
Your superpower is turning questionable, past their prime ingredients into gourmet yumminess. That is a good skill to have.
from narcissa :
11-5: ugh, hate money but hate not having it more. I have no advice, only pure commiseration and admiration that you always maintain your sense of humour. Also, once again, admiration about your creative use of leftovers: that soup / crepe use of leftovers, which i'm going to replicate when i get back to my life and a kitchen.
from jimbostaxi :
I sent you and email it’s not really haha funny but you know ,,, I sent it any way :0)
from candoor :
Ah, financial choices, I know them well. I live in a ghetto (five shootings in the past five days, one right across the street at a backyard party... I heard at least a dozen shots, luckily no story bullets headed my way). Love my job, but cutting a salary in half after not working for three out of the last five and a half years does drain the savings. I don't eat nearly as well as you for any number of reasons, one being all my appliances are in storage and the kitchen isn't clean enough to cook in, but I eat well now and then, out, just enough to maintain my relative poverty. Well enough to put on almost 30 pounds since last year. Will confessing that here motivate me to drop some weight? There's always hope. This note is all about me, huh? Well, your knack of making your troubles more amusing than mine had me trying, but alas, a fail is recorded here for all posterity. Thank you for that. Check out the better of the two cars, it might not break the bank. Put extra blankets and snacks and water in the car and make sure your phones are charged. Be careful on the driveway. Give up on the cat, just accept that cats are cats, obedience school is for dogs. There, free advice, for what it's worth. Take care and keep writing.
from jarofporter :
unless you have a state inspection for your vehicles, don't sweat the "check engine" light. you know how we fix those here? 1) remove the bulb. 2) put s smiley-face sticker over it. It's almost always an oxygen sensor that really isn't required for function (just optimum function). Fix the roof/house 1st, then the drive, then the vehicles (unless, you know 'inspection'...)
from kelsi :
Whenever my Subaru’s check engine light comes on I always convince myself it’s just the catalytic converter and no big deal. And that’s what it always is. But then I live in a state with no emissions requirements so it’s not a big deal. Hopefully yours are just lighting up for the impending holiday season or something!
from mhscutie05 :
Train the cat! lol That way he can fix the rest of whats left on your list!
from cocoabean :
loved your comment about the wolf texting you... I might use that! heh. I'm planning on trying more slivovitz but with pomegranates.... think it'll work?
from narcissa :
well, if you'd left, you'd have had to come back anyway for that excellent story.
from strawberrri :
I never read hissandtell but I'm so sorry to hear that someone else in the d-land community was lost in a similar way. I think of Stepfordtart a lot and how her family are coping. Wondering if it's correct etiquette to leave the heating on for the cleaner coming on Thursday - it's kinda chilly here in England. What a minefield!
from strawberrri :
Huh!? I need *someone* in to clean up the remnants of all the jager bombs and cigars! Oh okay, it's more that I spend three hours a day commuting and can't face the thought of having to pick up a duster when I get home. And the last time I mopped a floor Ollie said I did it so badly that I needed to attend mop school :(
from jarofporter :
hey, sent you an email...
from silentcries8 :
Thanks for your note! You must be right - having someone is good. Just gotta find someone who agrees :). Have a nice day!
from kelsi :
Speak for yourself, robot!
from bridgecity :
Those hammock pics! fuck yes.
from kelsi :
So you're telling me that this CBS Radio News clip isn't an audio file I'm listening to, it's some kind of smart robot that knows where I am and delivers certain parts of itself to me based on that? No me gusta. Too bad you're missing this guy's spots on some online recruiter tool now, you coulda gotten a free trial...
from mhscutie05 :
LOL, what do you have against wet, warm slippery phlegm lubrication? Are you traumatized from NewWifey(tm)? Lol Going commando? Maybe thats why nature was attacking you, for going commando. Lol But yes, I am finally over the sickness. Thankfully so are the little half-lings. I’ve been doing some strengthening down under, so hopefully that will keep me accident free… for now. lol Why don’t you upgrade your life to the modern technology btw? lol RIP Hammock.
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks for the note! it’s good to have you back and I took a really really really good look at that hammock and it looks like you destroyed it in a fit of rage after you heard that the price of lamb had went up. :0)
from yellow-ninja :
"Write back if you don't get it" - never have I been so insulted in all my days!
from yellow-ninja :
I live too far north to be the Mad Pooper. And that woman has been WITNESSED doing it! A woman and her children saw her doing it, and she's just kept doing it. If nothing else, you kind of have to admire her dedication to her art form.
from muffinhead :
I'm sorry, but that was f*cking funny. I mean, I'm glad you're ok and all, but really, that was funny.
from cocoabean :
Poor hammock! Be careful out there!
from swordfern :
Doing my part, one meal of deer ribs at a time. ;)
from kelsi :
Holy wow, I was all freaked out about the deer part. But bears are cuddly and cute. Weird that it destroyed your hammock! They're usually just looking for hugs.
from nineofswords :
1. That hammock saved your life 2 days in a row. I think maybe you should keep a hammock there, just in case! 2. I discovered in Estes Park, Colorado that I don't like to see real live bears unless I'm at the zoo.
from mhscutie05 :
Well well well. Look who couldn't stay away. lol jk. Who is DangerSpouse without NewWifey(tm)? And for that I give her a round of applause. Did you enjoy celibacy for those few days? lol
from narcissa :
lol - see my note. I didn't believe it for a second.
from nineofswords :
Whew! That was a close one Danger. Dontchoo ever do that again! I'm still a little riled up. In other news, your wife has once again enriched my life. I love that woman.
from kelsi :
You know you're probably the one responsible for getting Andrew to log back in, right? He saw you were leaving and was like, oh shit gotta spruce that joint up to woo back Mr. Dangerpants, oh shit oh shit oh shit. Et voila! So, thanks for that.
from portlypete :
Goddam! Just when I thought it was safe to go back in the shiny new, blue Diaryland! Don't you know you can buy plastic devices that closely simulate what you so desperately seek? And I'm guessing you could get a great 'buy two, get one free' deal online. So, let's be clear: I didn't go down on <u>my </u>knees begging you not to leave - or for any other reason come to that. You'd better be funny, or I'll have words with a higher authority - you know who I mean.
from alethia :
Yaaay! Long-distance high-fives for your New Wifey!
from jimbostaxi :
Welcome back :0)
from life-my-way :
I've a friend who used to say, "Women control half the money and all the pussy." And there you have it.
from swordfern :
Yay! You're back! Now I feel badly for messing up your notes page....
from candoor :
Solution! Just start a new Diary anonymously, never mention your esteemed famous ethically vital job, just leave a note for everyone in my notes with the words "don't tell anyone" and sign it with your new diary name. Then erase this note, eventually.
from candoor :
Andrew returned to give Diaryland a whole new face just for you. That is how important you are around here. Guilt trip x infinity.
from nineofswords :
Ahhhh... your entry gave me many chuckles and smiles until I got to the part where you quit. Damn you Dangerquitter!! You have inflicted a sense of loss on me and I was already sad about Tom Petty. I hope you reconsider.
from narcissa :
danger, i'm not going to lie- this bums me out. but i also feel quite certain that at some point you'll be back... you've got all those stories, honestly, what are you going to do with them?? take care.
from linguafranca :
What?! All in one day I find out about this, AND Andrew changes the edit page?! TOO MUCH CHANGE. Plus I never wrote you for your ham recipe. Is that still an option?
from aryssa90 :
But...but no! Come baaaaack!! I mean, I get it, I really do. But I do hope you'll check in now and again. If you don't, feel free to drop a line to let me know you're okay! Holdhandsnskip3 at yahoo yadda yadda You will definitely be missed, thank you so much for your support and advice and all the laughs :)
from candoor :
I finally understand OMG! (with the exclamation point, of course). Shirley, you can't be serious. Your mistake was telling everyone you were a famous celebrity, especially your coworkers. I mean, that's why I don't tell anyone I am a government official who signed a contract full of ethics and morals clauses and took an oath to uphold the high standards of public office in the state of Florida, e plu·ri·bus u·num and all saints at sea. Don't tell anybody I told you. At least do what I do, if you must disappear for a while, return out of the blue with some ridiculous excuse and rambling nonsense about some obscure reference that means nothing to anyone outside your head as if everyone has been waiting with baited breath for your update (cuz at least for you, that's true). Have fun out there in the world you ol' breath-baiter. I'll take bets that you force yourself back here much against your will because the addiction is real (or just as likely, NewWifey(tm) will drag you here at gunpoint after you ramble on to her once too often because you don't have this outlet for your amazingly talented babbling). If this really is a farewell of any sort, then consider this note a 21 gun salute to one of the best writers I've read online and a call to arms for publishing volumes of your best entries in hardcover glossy gold-embossed special editions. You deserve every fawning fan and pair of stained underwear thrown at you, you effervescent tower of man-flesh. Keep rollicking!
from integrating :
Aw man....You left two days ago and I just came back. Sucky sucky suck suck. whimper. You're the greatest. Maybe I'll check out WordPress too. d-land sucks. It's on life support. Time to pull the plug. Hasta man.
from whystinger :
I would hope this is not signing off for good. IF it is, drop me a note at my email, whystinger*at* yahoo.com for when I come to visit my old NY/NJ grounds.
from mhscutie05 :
Lmfao Damn, you got me. lol what’s left of my lungs are now on the floor from laughing too hard. Thanks, and your welcome for the note. :) So where do I send NewWifey(tm) the flowers and chocolates? lol
from mhscutie05 :
Wow. I invested all this time into Dangerland only for it to come to an agonizing end. It’s painful because I understand the WHY, because I wonder about that every day. And it sucks even more ass because there aren’t many people I can tolerate in this world. Honestly, the only reason I kept writing here after re-entrying into Diaryland was because of your blogging. All the non-sense you put into writing was very refreshing. I could write more, but I’m sure you get it. I wish you all the greatness in future endeavors with NewWifey(tm).
from comebacktome :
But but but...who will keep me entertained with stories of a kickass marriage, bukkake, and goats? I hope you keep reading and keep leaving people notes. And by people I mean me, obviously. Can you email me terrible quality pics of random culinary creations for me to drool over at least??
from misfitstray :
I can understand the Why, but I will miss you tons!!!
from alethia :
But...but...I CAN'T STOP CRYING!! You're like the fiddle player jumping off the sinking ship! All that's gonna be left is all us melancholy cocksuckers!!
from kelsi :
I'm sorry but only NERDS quit diaryland in the year 2017. The cool kids were quitting over a decade ago! >:(
from jimbostaxi :
I hear ya man i can feel where your coming from,,, come on back and I'll let you make all the offensive notes you want on my page...I know that's tempting right? Mull that over and hope to see you soon. Peace
from jarofporter :
Understand the need to move on, but would dig it if you kept this journal up. I don't read your other one. If you do stop writing here, make sure to send me an email or something so I can contact you, ok? Still owe you a beer I think!? :-)
from cocoabean :
Bye! *sniff*
from kelsi :
Are you okay? Hope so. How are the elbows?
from jarofporter :
Yo, where you at, man? Been wondering what's going on in Dangerhouse...
from msafire :
Your latest entry make me think could get over this fear of commitment thing. Lovely tribute to marriage!
from peggypenny :
Oh, i like those socks. Pegkins
from naomibeth :
8/17/17 You okay? I keep thinking your retaining wall collapsed and the house fell into a giant sinkhole and you're dead and there will be no more bread pudding ever ever again in the world. Then I get sad. Update!
from nineofswords :
1) How do you know that poop you stepped in was dog poop? I bet it was people poop. 2)You visit watches you can never own like I visit the bakery case at Kroger.
from nineofswords :
My vacation will be spent in my favorite place on Earth, Estes Park, Colorado. :-)
from mhscutie05 :
LMFAO!!!! In my previous note I meant to put... *YOU can do better!* My fingers can get slippery on the keyboard. :P
from jarofporter :
Yep, posted & deleted. I second-guess myself too much, I suppose, but for some reason I didn't feel comfortable leaving them up. Insecurity? Or maybe figured some things out on my own? Or some silly thing I've having trouble admitting to? Regardless, it was nothing that I haven't bitched about before, so you really didn't miss anything! :-)
from mhscutie05 :
Yea, you could work a little more on your punch line. I can do better. Lol I don’t know what made me scroll through the wordpress entry, but since I saw the tie I held my belly and laughed. NewWifey(tm), god bless her sweet little red headed curls, because she really took one for the team. Hahaha I can’t imagine what you look like on a normal day. That brings to mind the time you went to work with a shirt soaked in olive oil? I believe I have that information correct? Lol keep writing though, it’s very refreshing to know that there are others who are just as awkward in life as I am. :P
from papotheclown :
I thought I always responded to your notes, but it all could have been this thing I do where I respond in my mind and then just forget to actually type it out. Now that I am aware of this oversight, I will now overload you with antiquated compliments: You, dear sir, are the grand poobah, the bee's knees, the prime article, a real flutter bum, the tops.
from mhscutie05 :
I think my love for socks developed after my disgust in feet. haha But I'm kinda jellies at those socks. lol Great, now I have to go shopping for more socks!!! LOL btw, went to your wordpress blog, and noticed you had a kick ass tie too! But that didn't show in DL. I can't imagine what an Italian tower of hairless man flesh dressed in taxi socks, pepe le pew tie and a funeral suit looked like. Your wife is one lucky woman! lol
from jimbostaxi :
Ty very much ! I actually started a word press blog awhile back, I guess I'm going have to go back and give it some tender loving care.
from jimbostaxi :
Is Dland hosting your pics or are you using another service ? I'm not paying photobucket 400 bucks to link pics that's insane
from mhscutie05 :
Before I commit to your ridiculously long entry I will have to say... I LOVE THOSE SOCKS!!!! lol
from whystinger :
North Bergen. 'Nuff said. Nice socks Dude (heh heh heh) sorry to hear about the DOG SHIT! That sucks even more than the bubblegum. I need to finish reading, but loved the "chicken thighs covered in leftover..." Honi hated when I could rummage through the 'fridge and pantry and toss something together and have it turn out amazing.
from jimbostaxi :
Glad you took a cab I'm proud of you! :0)
from shortst101 :
Glad to see you are still writing! Love reading your stories! You still make me laugh and smile.
from yellow-ninja :
Yeah, he could absolutely be full of shit. But I'm not married to the guy. Nor will I ever marry the guy. I'm sure he'll do something soon enough to piss me off again and that'll be that.
from yellow-ninja :
Arbiter of taste and discretion! I'll take it, even as a not-at-all-veiled ploy to see my ass.
from yellow-ninja :
You know, I think maybe if you could see the tattoo, you might not think of it as marring (it's pretty cute on my lil cheek). But yeah, that was my thinking, too, before I got the damn thing, so what do I know?
from yellow-ninja :
Oh, I'm very undecided still. But appreciate the support nonetheless. :) What a month for me! Got a tattoo and found out my boyfriend is a drug dealer! Who even am I?
from yellow-ninja :
Looks like your alter ego might be back in the fantasy game quicker than anticipated. Male ego crisis averted!
from whystinger :
Thanks for the note. Nice garter snake - now they will strike at you and bite if cornered or pissed off bad, but harmless for sure.
from theshivers :
"Why is your self esteem so low?" is maybe the funniest thing anyone' s asked me in a long time. Also, I grew up around snakes (Texas, y'all) but if you throw spiders in my path I'll turn into your wife in a hot second.
from integrating :
HaHa! Your old lady's cool...I used to be terrified of snakes, til I had to live with my friend due to "divorce homelessness til I get my shit together." The spare room where they put me up is where her husband kept his snake. I kept my eye on it with heart pounding for a couple of weeks. Eventually I started to chill out and started thinking it was actually kind of cool. We were all out in the backyard one day, and he would let the snake roam the yard sometimes...so the snake was out. I was a little bit nervous. I was sitting on the edge of the concrete patio with my feet on the grass. I saw the snake coming toward me, it slithered under my legs as he went. I watched it and then reached down and touched it. No more fraid of snakes. Snakes are cool. Take her to a pet shop to look at them. Who knows?
from eloira :
Oooh, I'd love to have more snakes over here! It'd creep the neighbours the heck out, but all the more reason to keep a few around... Hope there are no more incidents until everything's shored up again... As for the note - I deleted it but it wouldn't expunge itself until you (thankfully) posted over it - thanks! Sleep deprivation makes me do stupid stuff. Not seen the film either but will look it up!
from mhscutie05 :
OMG! I just realized that you put me on your list of fav diaries!!!! Thank you thank you! Did I prepare a speech? YES!!! No. But much appreciation and thanks! I just can’t believe you can edit your profile and I can’t. lol But thank you again!
from mhscutie05 :
Hubby is lucky that I have as much patience and monastic silence as that of a thousand deaf and mute monks. But I’ve said before, when he drinks with his ‘buddies’ everything, EVERYTHING turns stupid! Lol But deep down I knew something was up, because he never texts me THAT much when he’s with his buddies! Lol Crazy man. And the foot fetish… I think I’m more frustrated about that than the actual stupid prank he pulled! Haha Omg, I mentioned it to him the other day what he did, and he has this stupid smirk on his face like, ‘I’m gonna put your whole foot in my mouth next time!’ O.O Appreciate the note though. lol
from jarofporter :
Heh, yes, if I actually have a house-warming party (unlikely), of course you two are invited! Of course, you'll be required to explain to me how to plan one, as I've never had/been to one before!?
from jarofporter :
Aww, cute little snake! I had a couple in my basement (last year?) - just pick em up, carry em out/away. If I had a website to upload them, I'd show you the pics/video I took. Hope you manage to get the retaining wall fixed!
from yellow-ninja :
When you're right, you're right. I'll let the rich ol' folks foot the bill. My mom sat me down and outlined just how filthy stinking rich they currently are and how rich they will be. It was disgusting. (1. What makes you think you had a chance before Mr. Hot Body? 2. While Mr. Hot Body is not open to an open relationship, it's not something I'm opposed to . . .)
from nineofswords :
I know, right? The Lean Cuisine was a little sad. I could have done much better. It was the sadness cherry on my Alone-for-the-4th cake.
from bridgecity :
"Holy Cow" is a separate song from "Working in a Coalmine". I'm not sure why they decided to name the album "Working in a coal mine...Holy Cow" it creates confusion.
from linguafranca :
You've been a favorite for a while now...I am just very slow to update the ol' profile.
from kelsi :
In fact I have two air conditioners - but not in my bedroom. It's usually not a problem because it cools off enough at night to just have windows open and fans running, but it's been staying really warm lately, and so I sweat all night.
from integrating :
Thanks DS. I just joined a gym for a year. Maybe that will cool his jets.
from mhscutie05 :
Ahh, did she also have the hamburger meat hair going on? Lol jk I just saw your other note. Epi-lady... lol Just remember you started this by posting that picture of your ankle. BTW, thanks for not showing the rest of your foot. :P
from papotheclown :
I used to read a lot of manga, but then just sort of stopped. I'm not really sure why. It was really only after seeing your note that I realized I haven't read any in about ten years or so. Any recommendations?
from mhscutie05 :
Good lord, are you saying ALL Italians are hairy? Aren't YOU Italian too? lol
from mhscutie05 :
HAHAHA!!! That's the best way to describe it. LMFAO What started it was this kid I met. A very hairy fellow, he wore a polo shirt and a gold chain. But he had so much chest hair that is was so puffy and dark it was coming out of his polo shirt, which he left unbuttoned of course. And the gold chain, well that laid nicely on top of the chest hair, not touching skin. And that look, uh uh… Hamburger meat hair!!! LOL
from mhscutie05 :
Haha, YES! The boinking AND the hotel stay was ridiculously great and we really needed it! lol While we were exiled I forgot to mention that I LOST MY PHONE!!!!!!!!!!! Lol Thankfully I got it back, a few days later. UGH! It was one thing after another! And yes, my bastard husband has MANLY HAIR on his legs. :P But his chest is smooth and free of any hamburger meat hair! LOL
from swordfern :
Thanks for the note. It made me smile. I really needed that today. :)
from mhscutie05 :
That's the best answer you came up with? I think you were too busy shaving your legs. LOL :D
from mhscutie05 :
Lmfao, I don’t know how to respond to that one. lol So why were you being a lazy ass anyway? :P
from gr8legs :
i'm still trying to get approval for the days off. but it's looking good. and no, i don't want the silver-tongued gent. i observed him speaking to women in the cafeteria and i can tell it's common place for him to speak in such a manner. but with all that being said, it didn't take away from how good i felt.
from mhscutie05 :
Are you sure you're not talking about YOURSELF. :P NewWifey(tm) is an angel, and only excretes magical gold dust! lol
from mhscutie05 :
MWWAAAHAAAA!!! The truth comes out! lol Well what can I say, I like to see manly man hair on my mans legs, but not the chest. Good God not the chest!!! I guess it’s a good thing you didn’t post a picture of the rest of your legs. lol Thanks for the comments though, and I am glad someone enjoys the entries. And yea, I could make a REAL cake, but with my crazy half-lings running around covering every surface of our wonderful apt in drool, snot, and poo. I’ll just take the lazy/easy way out. lol And I really was sad about Casey and Gloria. They deserved a shout out! :)
from mhscutie05 :
I was beginning to wonder where you wondered off to? Perhaps the vultures finally got you! lol But good to see you updated!!! But not so good to hear about the flea attacks. That’s one dangerpussy! Haha, get it? :P And nice pic. Lol Glad to see that it’s only HALF of your foot + ankle action, but with no man hair? I would have smacked my computer screen if I had to look at another pedi pic. Lmfao But you redeemed yourself with some food porn at the end. So thank you.
from misfitstray :
you took the pic of your ankle after you shaved all of your body-parts, or? Otherwise you seem to be pretty unmanly with hairless legs... not that I complain, I like my men as smooth as a baby's bottom. On first sight without reading your entry I thought they were (harvest-)mite bites.
from jarofporter :
good to see a post from you again!
from comebacktome :
I must confess, I was expecting some kind of note regarding my sexual debauchery that was positively mink like at Xmas, and yet none was forthcoming. Then again, I barely update these days and tend to comment on WP, so maybe that is why?? I do love your food porn pics though. I seriously want me some of that PB & J bread pudding!
from gr8legs :
Sir, peanut butter bread pudding??? Where do I sign up to be your mistress??? Perhaps your wife would like some days off and I could take her place for a month or so... Good idea? #7/2/17
from integrating :
I hate fleas...glad to see you post.
from weatethesea :
I can't remember if I already replied to your note or not, but: I FEEL SO SPECIAL! Somebody read my Diaryland diary! So to answer your question, no, I haven't seen Ferret Man around since then, but he has been spotted by some acquaintances in the same area (unsurprising). Your PB bread looks delish, and I think your wife and I have something in common re: adopting scraggly strays. Cheers to you both!
from whystinger :
Yeah, I got a lot of Midnight pussy like that... I miss that Midnight pussy
from mhscutie05 :
Hey Hey!!! Lol (Australian accent)’No worries mate! Note or not, you’re still alright. Just don’t get too mushy aye?’ lol Naaawww, it’s all good. Just giving you a shout out! Not that you really need one. You seem to already have a following. But thank you for reading the random entries I have. Lol I hope they are a good read to pass the time. And I am totally serious about the feet. -__- Ugh! Btw, thanks for the spoiler alert – RIP Casey and Gloria. *still reading your old entries* lol to NewWifey(tm). Sounds like she can play Hide and Seek very well! lol
from candoor :
Here I am, several hours past a sensible bedtime since four hours sleep is no longer enough to function as I would like to in my new career as savior of seminole county, but that's beside the point. All because I turned on the TV news for the first time in months. I shall leave your page open and hope to return this week as I want to catch up. Wishing wellness on your house and all occupants and welcomed visitors, I say goodnight and make it a tomfoolery Tuesday. Peace be with you and joy to the world and of course, love love love. My inner hippie rests.
from kelsi :
Aww man, I was just making a list ranking everyone I know and you're #8 overall on my list too! No ice cream, let's get some pho or something sometime. Hope things go well with the new cat friend - poor kitty looks like it's in rough shape.
from integrating :
Yay for kitty cats! We found a little kitty on our porch one night during a terrible snow storm. So we added it to our tribe of 3. Four cats now! So my dad says it's a female and because it was affectionate to an irritating degree, I named her Kissy. OK, turns out dad was wrong. I took the cat to my dad and said, "You can clearly see his nagas!" So, I had to rename Kissy. He plays very rough and he has this crouching, circling, attack at the exact weakest moment... so I named him Rowdy. He also takes the rowdiest shits you can imagine. So, he has the perfect name now.
from cloudy-night :
Nope, I didn't get it. The guy didn't have the title. It was a 99 Toyota Corolla. It was in good condition though. Thanks for wishing me luck, math sucks...
from cloudy-night :
Lol, I found it cute that your wife was hiding in closet. I am shocked that Midnight was living in the forest, that is one bad-ass cat! I love dogs, but cats are easily to tale care of, they are really independent. Congrats on the new arrival & hoping it isn't carrying any diseases.
from nineofswords :
Congrats on the arrival of your new BFF, Midnight Dangercat! Seems like a good addition to the Dangerhouse. Thanks for the food porn.
from gr8legs :
ok, now that you have made the peanut butter bread, it's now official that you need a mistress. i am volunteering for the position because...well...peanut butter. 6/11/17
from peggypenny :
Fantastic trip, thanks for taking me too via diary. It is not a myth. Pegkins
from nineofswords :
Brain wrinkles are the only ones I will accept. :-)
from cloudy-night :
So NJ isn't so bad, eh? Good to know, maybe I'll have to go to the beach there sometime. We are alike in many ways, but the biggest is the lack of communication. I think we would go days ( maybe weeks ) without talking to one another. And the thing is, we probably won't be doing anything but sitting around our respective homes. She likes to talk, but not for long periods of time. I'm just the same. I think a lack of communication would kill any romantic relationship, but not a friendship.
from mhscutie05 :
It was mostly dry heaving followed with some gagging. Lol But I’m sure your wife had good intentions when she snapped that photo! Lol I’ll be sure to avert my eyes from any future pedi show you might post. Lol yea yea, I’ve been meaning to post something, but I save my shit on word at work, and I forget (ALL THE TIME!) to copy and paste and submit. Lol (BTW, why no pics of the lobster fiesta?)
from nineofswords :
Love the pics! I didn't know about sand fleas. So my brain has a new wrinkle today and it's all because of you. :-)
from mhscutie05 :
Sounds like a lovely mini-vaca. But really? really? Feet? FEET! For some reason that's one thing I can't stand, seeing other people's feet! I can't even stand my own feet! lol No offense. :P But it, sounds like you both had a lovely time. Wish you could have taken pictures of the seafood. lol
from cloudy-night :
The trip that you took to the beach (c'mon man, give me a pass... I'm from Missouri) sounded like it was fun. I didn't know that there was such a thing as sand fleas, but I guess being pinched isn't as bad as being bitten or sucked for your blood. I have always heard NJ was horrible, but it doesn't seem so bad.
from alethia :
BUT DANGERSPOUSE. THE KITCHEN IS WHERE THE BUTTER IS. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO NOT EAT BUTTER, WHEN THERE'S BUTTER?!!
from alethia :
BUT DANGERSPOUSE. THE KITCHEN IS WHERE THE BUTTER IS. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO NOT EAT BUTTER, WHEN THERE'S BUTTER?!!
from whystinger :
Thanks for the note too. Hear something funny Atkins style? I can eat a single egg for breakfast and it will hold me to lunch better than having two eggs, toast and bacon. Two eggs alone is fine too. I think the carbs fuck with some of us.
from mhscutie05 :
Lol That’s your problem. You’re surrounded by people who accept you for who you are. Damn them!!! Pussy enablers! Lol
from nineofswords :
You tasty snack, you.
from mhscutie05 :
LOL Jabba the Hut? Nawww, But it seems like everyone around you doesn't want to upset you with the truth!!! Huh, now why is that? lol
from nineofswords :
Hilarious read! Atkins is a good diet! Carbs are the source of all evil. It's not fun to see bears when you are not at the zoo. That picture of the bike on its side on top of the rollers cracked me up. It tells the tale of a hasty exit. I'm glad you didn't end up as a tasty bear snack.
from blujeans-uk :
Dude! I am not preggers!
from aryssa90 :
I'm doing Atkins too! I do these cyclical Atkins binges but I'm really trying to stick with this one. I made a mock shepherds pie with cauliflower mash the other day. No bears were harmed in the making of this dish.
from gr8legs :
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... 5/21/17
from strawberrri :
Fantastic diary entry! My mum and stepdad have one of those static bikes - it's called a turbo trainer. I <3 bears because my cuddly husband reminds me of one :)
from whystinger :
Yep, I have weight problems now too. The hardest thing for me is to break the boredom eating habit. Got any good tips for that? I was eating way too many sweets in the evening. I am on a new breakfast shake that seems to help with the sweet cravings, so only the boredom eating remains... Love the bear story.
from integrating :
great story about Atkins diet and THE BEAR!
from alethia :
Atkins, huh? Maybe I'll try it. I'm hovering around 220 right now, but with little time to work out, it's very frustrating.
from cocoabean :
But bears do like cake! However, there is usually no cake to toss into the trash....
from kelsi :
Hey now, my car is a showpiece. p.s. I *heart* radio.
from muffinhead :
I am personally glad to hear from your perspective that radio is NOT dying. I enjoy talk radio myself (tho I've never understood why music radio is still around when they play the same crap year after year - however Pandora, Sirus and the like are no better and I refuse to pay for someone else's tired playlist). Going by what *some* have said and the fact that some of my favorite things, like books and cds are slowly going the way of the dinosaur it had made sense at the time. I guess the industry is doing what most are- doing more with less(staffing). It's all fun and games until someone pokes an eye out. Engineers! Add to that anyone who designs kitchen floor plans. People who don't do the work- designing things that make NO sense to the mechanic or the cook. I've run into this far too many times in my life! I'll take your Vitamix, I'm sure you have a more complex model than I do. Mine = on/off high/low. Though honestly I knew of the other models prior to my purchase and didn't see a need for timers or speeds since really what a Vitamix does best is pulverize the crap out of everything. Timer didn't make sense either, running a blender unattended isn't a habit of mine. And mine is purple, bet yours isn't. I'm a country style rib person myself and I either dutch oven it or slow cooker them hehe. I see no shame in it, but I'm not a guy- smoke and flames are a man's job. Cast iron is no shame though, as far as I'm concerned. Ya know 3 little pigs bbq is available on Amazon...I used to sell that stuff when I was a buyer for a small novelty kitchen shop. It's good stuff. But! I've always been a fan of Bullseye Original- my love of it bolstered years later when America's Test Kitchen picked it as best/recommended and has several times since. Plus it's not $15 a bottle.Be well friend.
from newschick :
aww before i had to get the minivan to accommodate so many damn carseats, i had a rogue. fab car. i loved it!
from nineofswords :
1.) That was a disgusting and harrowing tick story. I laughed, I cried, there was something for everybody. 2.) I won't argue with your oven smoked ribs because I myself have resorted to oven cooking ribs and they were identical to the good ole fashioned smoker cooked variety. Plus, they look great in your picture!
from jarofporter :
soap trick is a good idea, but i'd still try it in the valve core & around the valve stem base.
from swordfern :
And you're totally right about her taking a retaliation picture the wrong way. She'd probably think that I was requesting to become number 6 in her polyamorous grouping!
from swordfern :
Ahhh, sorry, no offence to the Americans in the room! It's just that when a place is full of tourists, then you know that there is little desire to provide exemplary service because the customers are not likely to return anyhow... Plus they probably got a voucher for breakfast for staying in the hotel above, which would have made me far less annoyed about paying $17 for a mediocre ham and Swiss crepe (1) with uninspired plating (3 tomato slices, aforementioned wilty kale sprig). Oh - the dollar's great in Canada for you Americans right now... come on up!!!!!!!!
from jarofporter :
would you believe, i played it safe & stayed in? went to bed shortly after posting! btw, quite often if i tire is leaking down & doesn't have a puncture, it's the stupid valve stems. you might just be able to get those replaced if the tires are still good.
from alethia :
!!!!! TICKS CAN CAUSE ALLERGIES TO RED MEAT!!!! I'm not even lying. That would be worse than Lymes Disease. Radiolab did a podcast on it called Alpha Gal. It's thing! Beware!
from gr8legs :
gotta love that KC BBQ. i sent my friend a KC BBQ care package a few years ago. it shouldn't be hard in getting someone to send you more bottles. :) 5.7.17
from integrating :
HaHa! Knew you'd like that one! :P
from buffylass :
Thank you :)
from nineofswords :
The Easter bread is so pretty. I cried a little. The ham looks great too. I liked your dad story. I have a cool dad too. He's kind of my favorite person.
from integrating :
(In Oprah Winfrey's voice) You will LOVE this! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhvzWoV3bso&feature=share
from kelsi :
Yeah but you're not gonna pay $500 for a new 6-disc changer, are you? I'll pay $50 for one but for $500 I could get a whole new car! After I get the new dashboard LEDs installed I'll then probably be getting hydraulics, and ground effects, and a hot tub in the back, and one of those aoogah horns just to be funny.
from gr8legs :
a pleasure as usual. 5/1/17
from integrating :
Thank you for the note...I need to go to the Dr, maybe they could up the dosage because I'm depressed a lot...I just couldn't write anything the last three months.
from linguafranca :
Ok, dish. Ham recipe, please!
from strawberrri :
Hehe, sorry but been busy moving over the past month so it's passed in a quick yet "never want to move ever again" blur! Update soon... Probably :)
from alethia :
Sooooo...I hear your dad is single. ;) I'll bring the case of wine...
from alethia :
Twenty days and no update? Where the heck are you? Don't make me come over there.
from kelsi :
No IKEA couch for me but perhaps even worse - Amazon!
from mhscutie05 :
lol Your stories I have enjoyed very much. Your wifey though, how does she put up with you? lol I can't imagine what it feels like for a flea to be bouncing around on your ear drum. > . < lol And to put two notes in one, the answer is YES. Jabba the Hefer, is single. But manages an online boyfriend from time to time. What is even creepier, is she's been eyeballing this esqueleto gringo here at work. She looks at him like the big lady from Nacho Libre at Ramses' party. lol She's ready to eat him! lol
from nineofswords :
1.) still trying to get over that fowl pun. 2.)I stayed with the cutie for a long ass time. I was under the delusion that this was a mandatory lifetime choice. Even when I did put him out of the house, we didn't do the paper work for years, so I was technically married long past the 2 year mark where I should have thrown in the towel. Regrettable.
from catsoul :
Thanks for the note. No rush about the buttons. Just you wanting to do that means a lot. Hope your Sunday has been yummy!! Peace Out. =^..^=
from jimbostaxi :
Happy Easter! May your Chocolate bunnies be fruitful and multiply :0)
from muffinhead :
and p.s. I'm glad your job for now seems to be safe. It seems radio is a dying thing. I'm curious, have you ever thought about podcasting? You did say you could talk endlessly...and you wouldn't have to talk about our doom and gloom world anymore if you didn't want to!
from muffinhead :
Cooking (and baking) does indeed fight sadness! Why I made a batch of wonderful peanut butter cookies and it kicked the cheeriness up a point or two (granted I'm still in the negative but I'm much higher up than I was mind you). Also, butter, bacon and frying always make something better. Was reading your entry about batter. Agreed. I love squash blossoms lightly battered and fried. Yum. And couldn't be simpler to make.
from nineofswords :
Some of the things you did to that poor chicken could be classified as war crimes. Tasty, tasty war crimes.
from mhscutie05 :
Ahh yes, slimy snots are an acquired taste. You should know, you're a chef right? lmfao Hubby bought me a NoseFrida. Best tool for any mama bear. lol He gags all the time when I mention anything slimy. And I respond by laughing at him. Funny you mention constipation, because I have a short story for that too. lol Very similar to what you did with your cat and q-tips! lmfao butt the ending result being a small explosion, in the face. -__- lol
from mhscutie05 :
LOL Have you developed a phobia to the penguins since then? lol I just finished reading ‘Mule!!! Nag!!!’ I probably shouldn’t read your entries at work because that one had me literally Laughing Out Loud. That doesn’t help. :P But who gets attacked by Vultures!!! Really?!! And then raping your own cat! WHAT?!! lol Oh god, I hope I don’t sound like a stalker. -__- *face palm* lol Thank you for sharing your unfulfilled, boring and mundane life experiences. But mostly thanks for your note, much appreciated. Out of all my fears of dying, drowning being number 1, having someone read my stuff is one of them. lol I just hope I don’t sound like an idiot smoked out on crack with 15 straight hits of acid and bath salts after being awake for 115 hours straight. O.o
from kelsi :
Better than the apple consortium, "Big Apple". Have you visited a juice aisle lately?
from yellow-ninja :
No wonder your post-elbow surgery convalescence was so difficult for you!
from yellow-ninja :
You can scroll with one hand. Don't be lazy.
from yellow-ninja :
I mean, if you can distribute some free literature with Beans in your mind, you absolutely should. But I think I may have fixed the issue.
from whystinger :
Danger, I am glad that you are still employed. I do understand some of what you are going through as I went through that when I left Honi for the first time and the company I worked for went almost bust. It sounds like your company may have a plan or is working on getting a new account and needs to keep folks on hand. Sit tight, conserve cash, pay down debt, update your resume and plan in case the worse happens. I have a feeling that our company is working on or courting other networks and will need more folks. When my company did go bust, I was put into a job I didn't really want, but ended up really enjoying and being excellent at. Blessings come at unexpected times. You will land on your feet regardless.
from mhscutie05 :
First, glad to hear you still have a job! Lol I hate those times man. It’s stressful, just don’t let it get to you. You don’t want those ulcers from your penguin days to come back. Lol And secondly: YES, I told you I’m reading it FROM THE BEGINNING! That’s what happens when you post your shit on the internet. *shrugs shoulder* Lol MASOCHIST!!!! *gasps* well I never… lol ok ok, so what, I get turned on when men cry in pain. Jk lol *evil grin* I have been called much worse, but kid? Haha wow, thank you! That made me feel younger. Usually I’m the one calling these little hoodlums I work with kids. Lol Funny thing, I’m not much older than they are. I’m also glad you didn’t say ‘baby girl’. Don’t know why, but it just grinds my gears! Lol As for the creativity – in writing – I think I will use your style. ‘no editing, no content, no worries’. What better way to just let the juices flow, and let that shit fly! “Parental advisory” stickers all over this bitch! Inspiration! Lol *drops the mic*
from alethia :
Hey, if you find yourself unemployed, I'm in the market for a housewife. Duties are very light, I promise. Primarily food making and cocktail shaking, with the occasional load of laundry. No weird stuff. You wife can come too. I'll make up a cot in the basement for the two of you. ;)
from mhscutie05 :
I’m hanging on strong! Kinda. lol Finding time enough to be creative can be hard at times, but so far it hasn’t been excruciating. I have found myself reading your diary though, merely because of curiosity. So I started from the beginning. 1.) I love your wife 2.) Reading your diaries is like watching an R rated version of Jerry Seinfeld. Lol Don't stress too hard, don't need those ulcers to come back and haunt you. lol If you're doing what you love to do, then stick with it! It'll work out. There are more worse things that can happen.
from kelsi :
Dang, sorry you're going through this. Hope it works out for you. Sometimes the worst thing happens, though - but we still manage to make it through, as we are magnificent and resilient animals.
from narcissa :
ugh, sorry, that's super stressful. Thinking of you.
from life-my-way :
Duuuude, that sucks. Nineofswords is probably right, you could make some bank doing voiceovers. Damn shame that being funny and smart and awesome doesn't pay better than it does. Makes no sense, really. Dang.
from barefootruby :
oh yeah, and shite that you heard the news second-hand rather than direct from the management. But that often doesn't change much this side of the pond.
from barefootruby :
Sounds line a bummer, but here's hoping everything works out OK one way or another. I guess one area UK-land is ahead of US-land is in employment law. There has to be a consultation period before redundancies, there has to be 28 days notice (or pay in lieu) and you have to be given a minimum of one week's pay for every year worked (one and a half for old people like us). And severance pay is tax free.
from catsoul :
So a small hiccup. I won't say it could be worse, I so dislike when people say that or write that. I am glad you have your wife and cooking/baking. I don't know what to say here. Just hang in there. You and your wife could come here if need be. We have lots of room and you can commune with Mother Earth. Take Care man. Peace Out. =^..^=
from candoor :
Tragedy or pending tragedy gets such an unfair read on April 1. The gullible leap to sympathy and worry. The cautious say nothing, risking the faux pas of appearing like they don't care, and return a day or two later to see if it was for real. The rest of us fall in the middle, wondering what to do. Maybe the rest of us are silently waiting in that second category. Anyway, may the axe not fall on your tree and if it is not too late to ask where your voice can be heard, remind us all... I'd love to listen.
from nineofswords :
I've got a couple of serious suggestions for you about what to do with yourself if you get kicked to the employment curb: Set up a "Voice 123" account and start doing voice over work. If you make a good profile and upload some demos of your voice, commercials, announcing, etc. you can build up a production house or voice over business from your home. The sky is the limit. Secondly, why are you not a chef? You ARE a chef and you could be paid for that. Start Cheffing, Chef.
from whystinger :
Thanks, Danger. My Mother came though the surgery well and the doctors were pleased. Afterwards was a bit tense due to a few things, but she got through those things and is on the mend again. I hope either you make out fine with the loss of the customer, or hopefully, it is an April Fool's joke.
from life-my-way :
Heavens, man, I hope this is an April Fools deal. Also, this is why I hate April Fools. All of which reminds me that 4/1 is the date I picked to be the puppy's birthday so it's good that I took him out lake swimming and frolicking and junk. Please let this be fake.
from aryssa90 :
Ugh that's terrible. I'm really sorry and I'll think positive (and only slightly naughty) thoughts for you. Keep us updated!
from nineofswords :
I don't get by New Jersey very often, but I'm happy to know that my bread dreams could be fulfilled there. Thanks for the kind offer. :-)
from catsoul :
I thank you a zillion billion times. =^..^=
from kelsi :
Thanks, son - right back atcha
from catsoul :
hi. clothing or craft buttons. Granddaughter wants to collect them, I am thinking we can make collage pictures with them, or glue them into a picture on a wall in her bedroom. The imagination is always open to all creativity. I am big into making altered art. There is one wall in our hallway that I have made into a mural for granddaughter. As she gets taller it gets taller. This Summer I told her she will be helping me on the mural. Peace Out. Oh, thanks for the inquiry man! Appreciate it. =^..^=
from yellow-ninja :
WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT?!
from nineofswords :
Very amusing post. My nephew plays a kid game and finds ways to cheat it in similar fashion. Also, you should know...That bread you baked is going to haunt my dreams.
from mhscutie05 :
Oh boy. *face palm* As you can tell I've never had to respond to ANY notes. lol But thank you for the encouragement. I'm not looking to write a best sellers, but just something! I'm also looking forward to future entries as well! lol I'm just not thrilled about my earlier entries. -__- But I do enjoy a few of yours that I've read. :)
from gr8legs :
you had me at paella! and again, entertaining as usual. 3.27.17
from catsoul :
OMG I used to play Animal Crossing. Not anymore. Moved on to FarmVille. Been playing that since Zygna started it, way back when. I understand your need to play. Gotta go farm! Peace Out. =^..^=
from yellow-ninja :
Your appreciation is much appreciated. I wouldn't normally be one to complain - less bounce on a run is a good thing, after all. It's just no bounce at all is not as much fun.
from raven72d :
Acme is okay; Jolie Pearl downtown is better. I'm always and ever a Japanophile...and I miss the rings here at D-Land.
from aryssa90 :
Um I'm a little in love with your wife. I need a husband like her. My furnace is currently held together with a zip tie of that gives you any indication of the home owner skills my household possesses.
from yellow-ninja :
I would love to eat an entire dinner! I should warn you, though - your post-show entertainment is pretty bleak, given the state of things around here. We've disagreed on what passes for mountains before, but I'm sure we'd not have any arguments about these particular molehills.
from mhscutie05 :
Hello fellow member of the community. Yes it has been almost 10 years. I can't believe it myself. I just happen to browse some things back in the day and ended up here. lol No, I did not follow the manga dream. But I do hope to be an author. I have horrible grammar skills which will come as a challenge, but I can dream. lol Thanks for the welcome back. I look forward to being more active here. :)
from eloira :
Thanks for that! I disappeared down that internet rabbit hole for a while... That's the sort of thing! Specifically from the Final Fantasy series, but I also have the soundtracks for a few of the others too
from kelsi :
One day we will be cool again. But until then, *like*. Also, the kids these days aren't using end punctuation
from eloira :
It's one of the Distant Worlds concerts. Computer game music, but it's beautiful! There are some clips on the internet of various bits and pieces from over the years, but it's a 30th anniversary so a mish-mash of styles. Can't wait!
from nineofswords :
Thanks for the pity. Just what the doctor ordered. You know... I actually live in the house of my dreams. I'm not ready to give it up and I would much rather get a summer home in Colorado and keep this home. I am torn between family proximity, my gypsy yearnings to go far away, and my wonderful house that I live in now. And I guess you are right about me not giving the wife search enough effort. That whole hetero thing has really thrown a wrench in it.
from nineofswords :
I think I have the same scourge you have. You are the lucky one though, because your wife is awesome and I don't even have a wife, much less an awesome one. I only have the plague. Pity me.
from narcissa :
ugh, i know, right? netflix is the worst. hope you feel better!
from misfitstray :
If your wife ever gets fed up with you, I'll marry her at once!
from narcissa :
your wife is so badass. I want to be her when i grow up and have a water heater.
from catsoul :
3.22.17 You have got a good wife with skills, so I hope you made a super duper superb dinner for her. Hope you feel better. Take Care. Peace Out. =^..^=
from nineofswords :
I don't think Dexter would make a suitable turkey substitute under any circumstances, but Jax on the other hand... he's a meaty fellow.
from catsoul :
Wow that is a lot of corned beef and fixins'!! You are a good husband. Oh and thanks for the compliment you wrote me, appreciate it. We built sand castles with our mittens on today and than swinging on the swingset for I swear, had to be over an hour. Enjoy your leftovers. Peace Out. =^..^=
from aryssa90 :
I think that the real question here is which one out of the 3 was the best? Inquiring minds need to know.
from gr8legs :
as always, thanks for the comedy. 3.15.17
from alethia :
What about powdered sauces?
from ladyofjazz :
That box cake swap is really bad news. Oh the regret.
from narcissa :
i was never too devout, but i definitely traveled the catholic to atheist route. Mostly no regrets except for just the kind of situation i described. [ps - sausage gravy is just what living in the south was like. i feel your pain. I love nashville and i loved new orleans but green things are few and far between if you're visiting]
from eloira :
Good gods, not box pudding... Erm... Best of luck? We gift the stuff, but make our own mixes rather than actually wrap bought pudding-in-a-packet, because too many reasons... As for the game - a good one!! I have just started a new one in which the scenery and music are better than gameplay and my character is an android for whom emotion is actually prohibited. So far, so good!
from alethia :
When my roommate declared she was going to bake a cake (shortly after I moved in), and she meant BOXED cake, I think I gasped so hard I folded the space-time continuum. Needless to say, no BOXED cake has ever graced this kitchen while I've lived here, and she's bloody well learned how to bake at least a basic cake.
from kelsi :
Even though we've had our fair share of winter over here in this neck of the woods and it's been beyond thrilling to finally see curbs again, I'm super duper jealous of your giant winter storm. I want three feet of snow! Gah! I hope you enjoy it. Anyway, think of me what you will, but a couple weeks ago I bought pistachio pudding mix at the store. It was delicious. AND it wasn't even Jell-O, it was the store brand. I've never made pudding from scratch but I suppose I'm sufficiently shamed now to look it up. Thanks, bucko - stay safe.
from cocoabean :
It's not gonna snow in San Diego!
from joistmonkey :
I am disappointed that your big long food word didn't turn out to have mole roast in it. Eat the little burrowing bastards. Still, at least I know what chicken mole is now, and roast vegetable terrine sounds mightyfine. But not as nice as roasted rodent.
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks for your note - I replied to it on the wordpress account, trying to lead you over there where we can have a conversation... I was aghast at your tale of the craft fair, which your writing enabled me to visualise all too bloody clearly. Seeking therapy.
from kelsi :
A few years ago I accidentally bought sacred basil and it was a summer-long nightmare. Since then I've been paranoid that I won't have enough sweet or Genovese basil so I buy packets of it whenever I see it. I agree, you can never have too much basil! I usually plant two or three basil plants for each tomato plant I have. And I usually have upwards of 20 tomato plants. I don't have a large garden. I need to think about things.
from aryssa90 :
You're still one of my favorite adults. I'm jealous of all your sexy times. I think I'm struggling with the hobby thing because I am kind of a control freak and I like doing things I'm good at so, trying new things is difficult for me since I'm obviously not going to be fantastic at them right away. I'm taking up the cello again and I'm looking into a painting class. I'm also looking into archery so, there are options! That's a start. Baking would ultimately be something I would LoVE to try but it kind of conflicts with the whole losing weight thing right now. I feel like my hobby should be eating delicious food you make ;)
from gr8legs :
even though i was born in cow country, i'm not the one for bbq, although, i do enjoy a plate of gates' steak fries (those things are amazing!). once i had a taste of seafood i've been a changed woman and it was rare i ventured towards anything else. 3.1.17
from yellow-ninja :
It's such a relief to have actual, actionable plans! And to have the go-ahead to take ibuprofen again. Tylenol doesn't do shit. Thanks for the note, and enjoy your trip!
from buffylass :
Haha we were all amazed that the NHS doesn't provide the sieves - maybe they couldn't fill the job position of Poo Sieve Autoclaver. Hope the arm's doing OK.
from nineofswords :
"Tranny" is a bad word now. You must now refer to the CTV tranny as a CTV Transgender. Kthxbai
from mistfree :
Your wife is a hell of a man!! If she ever decides to switch sides, let me know! I'm sure my husband will be happy to let me re-marry for someone who does car work! LOL
from gr8legs :
well, tickle me down under!! even though i grew up in kc, i was in the raytown school district so i went to raytown schools all the way through high school. i went to westridge elementary, raytown south middle then raytown south high :) imagine that! #smallworld 2.27.17
from theshivers :
Nice nail polish - I think it suits you.
from cocoabean :
not sure if you're reading this guy, but the title made me laugh! http://www.politicalgarbagechute.com/trump-uses-first-amendment-wipe/
from cloudy-night :
I wouldn't forget you guys. You're some of my favorite people and what kind of friend would I be if I didn't give you all some cash and hit the town with a limo filled with hookers and drugs? Not a good one, right? After that, I will complain to you all that we are part of the problem and need to fix it.
from aryssa90 :
That just sounds delicious. I will have to tell you how they turn out. I really love baking and I have a crap ton of recipes but I have never found the perfect chocolate chip cookie. Perhaps my search has ended?! Stay tuned for more! As one of my favorite adults, I have a question. How does an adult go about finding...hobbies?
from aryssa90 :
I am just flush with happiness and well, the actual ability to flush! How are you doing? I need a perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe! Something gooey and delicious!
from raven72d :
Thanks--- much appreciated!
from yellow-ninja :
Thanks, man. Platitudes may not seem like much, but they are helpful. My sister's not a bad person - she's just often self-centered and very mean. If you take a utilitarian view of morality, she's probably a net good. I must have been a pretty bad person in my last life to earn my recent string of rotten luck. Here's hoping I get to be a butterfly the next time around.
from narcissa :
LLLOLLOL @ your entry (2/21) i guess this was all inevitable [and yes! I would have marched wherever i was but it was way better to get to do it in DC for this one. i saw your entry and I do think that you could have gone - i think seeing all the supportive men there was really just as important as the march itself]
from alethia :
Oh, yes. Yes we do.
from annanotbob2 :
You too, sweet pea xx
from kelsi :
Yes, good, I like to instill a sense of shame in my readers.
from whystinger :
Thanks for the note, the plan is to wok toward self voiding without self cath. Still self cath is much, much better than wearing a "closed catheter system and a bag of piss on one's leg... I went for a second opinion and liked this urologist and switched. He is sharp and has moved me further and faster in two weeks than the previous urologist did in a few months. Love the short entry ton the Wallkill River Wildlife Refuge. I used to hike there occasionally and have some great and funny memories. Perhaps it is getting near the time for me to get up that way and visit some old friends. I have been trying to do that for a few years.
from cloudy-night :
*smacks forehead* I forgot to mention what veggies I like. There aren't many, so here goes. I like: Green beans, bean sprouts, carrots (sort of) spinach (slightly), jalapenos, red peppers ( green and yellow too) and that's it. Not a lot, I know... But some is better than none.
from nineofswords :
1. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. Just be glad you have the opportunity to hunt women. 2. How timely... a post about poor reporting. 3. I've noticed a real devolution in news articles over the past few years. I find a lot of typos and spelling errors where you would not expect to see that sort of thing. I think this is from internet reporting where the editing is apparently non-existent.
from cloudy-night :
Damn it all! I was just about to mount up and head your way. Hunting down women in the wild with a shotgun seemed like it would be thrilling. I was going to be on some Ernest Hemmingway shit, oh well... There are some vegetables I like, I just don't know what to pair them with ( besides rice ). I know you're a good cook, if there are any simple recipes that you know of, could you send them my way?
from jarofporter :
hey! didn't mean to imply anything negative - you're generally right, and i realize i overthink things. sometimes i don't when i'm in the moment, but it helps to have that reminder. keeps me from driving myself crazy. guess what i'm saying is, thanks for reminding me i should mellow out sometimes! :-)
from muffinhead :
You said raw lemons...had known someone with a very serious food allergy, NO PRESERVATIVES, good luck with that right? Everything had to be made from scratch with all natural ingredients. For her, the plainer the food, the better or it WOULD result in a trip to the hospital, as in life threatening. She would eat out poised with an epi needle over a thigh and a cellphone close at hand after interrogating the waiter about how the food is made and preserved. No way to live. Anyway I thought I'd bring this up, LEMON JUICE is often used as a preservative in the food service industry especially when it comes to produce and even chicken. My old aquaintance couldn't even eat that. Maybe THAT is what your NewWifey is reacting to with that taco salad.
from raven72d :
Good advice! Merci!
from movingsands :
I've wondered if those chocovine bottles were any good!
from gr8legs :
you are quite the comedic writer and i thoroughly enjoy your entries. they never fail to make me laugh out loud. thanks! and double thanks for showing pics of the food. food pics always seal the deal! :) 2/15/17
from muffinhead :
I'm back and caught up with you...THANK YOU for the belly laugh that is your man vs phone entry. And CONGRATS to you for the resistance to modern technology! I do miss my Motorola Startac....
from nineofswords :
I can open up the flood gates of whining and bitching like nobody's business. You may come to regret giving me that gracious go-ahead.
from vxxen :
Yeah, I hope it -IS- a start at a new life. thank you. :)
from strawberrri :
Awesome chicken stock! I am lazy though and just use a cube. My life was revolutionised when I discovered you can crumble the cube whilst it's still in its little foil packet, rather than crumbling it in your hands and getting stock bits all over them. Thanks for your note a while ago too - sorry it's taken nearly a month to reply :)
from catsoul :
I know curious minds want to know, ok, change that have to know. The answer is YES, she left for work, but was 5 minutes late. Anyhoo, not much else going on here. Have a good one puddin'. Peace Out. =^..^=
from buffylass :
Afraid the baby name shortlist is a state secret! Man, on a side note I am watching with fascinated horror as our terrible leader meets your terrible leader, and they have terrible conversations together. It's exciting in a terrible, terrible way.
from misfitstray :
Sycophantic - hmmhmm? Had to look up this word. Tough. Am I? ;) Well, I'd take the bread, but you can have the slivowitz all to yourself. I'm not a fan of the hard stuff... But I'd bring beer, if you like.
from cloudy-night :
Wow, you're too lazy to cut and paste. Tsk, tsk, tsk. What is going on? And don't you dare make a reference to 4 Non Blondes!
from misfitstray :
Hey man, you have your period or what, that you are whining for a bit of love? So, here it is. Man, I love you and your entries especially the ones about how great you are at making sauces and soups and bread and - of course - chicken stock! ♥
from whystinger :
I would imagine that the stock made in the bain marie would be richer and would also gel when refrigerated, correct?
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks for you nice notes. I'm at wordpress, double posting too, because I can't quite leave this stupid, annoying, bloody diaryland where I started, but I like to have actual conversations with people so I'm there too annanotbob4@wordpress x
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks for noticing :9) I tried to make it slightly more cohesive I know it's not all that pretty yet but its still a work in progress. You were in my thoughts the other day i kept saying to myself that I should really drop by here and leave you a note because it's been awhile but I suck and kept forgetting. There could be more "Maggie's" if I let them in my life but my life is filled with rules and order there's no room for that kind of fun. For a brief second I let my guard down and had some fun it was a momentary lapse in judgement on my part it's safer just to shut everyone out.
from jarofporter :
Me? Overthink something? http://i.qkme.me/3oksxt.jpg
from catsoul :
No. Last time I ate a waffle was before 1/13/2006. As for NyQuil. That is nasty crap, and I have never ever in my life taken any. So there, sticks her tongue out now at you. =^..^= P.S. Have not ingested any drugs other than my normal a.m. doctor prescribed meds. I will have to write the back story to that entry. Hey man, I never ever have said I am shallow. Still waters run deep is how my dad describes me. Gave you something to think about I bet.
from cloudy-night :
You guys couldn't be boring if you tried. Now me on the other hand...
from kelsi :
I ain't putting my address here! You know how many stalkers would be showing up at my door? Dozens upon dozens! You know how diaryland people are.
from evanelle :
Thank you. :)
from aryssa90 :
Okay but seriously. How do you make a move on a virgin? Like, are they just okay with anything? It's confusing. I mean, I havent had sex in months and Im dying, dunno how he's lasted all that long.
from aryssa90 :
I haven't been ignoring you! Well, I kind of have but not in a mean way. I've just been super antisocial. Happy birthday, belatedly! Your apple apple pie was super cute and thank you for all the notes! I hope your wife feels better, the flu is going around and it is ickyyyy
from kelsi :
Yes, undercooked, and also how the crap do you hollow out apples without destroying the apples or yourself? I destroyed both. Also, I'd never made pie dough before and that wasn't super successful. And I don't have a rolling pin. All in all a fairly epic failure, but tasted good nonetheless.
from kelsi :
I attempted to make an apple pie in an apple in honor of your butthdats and it turns out it's much easier to look at pictures of apple apple pies on the internet than to make apple apple pies. But I tried! Next time will be much better.
from darktruth :
hey! so heads up: i haven't changed my diaryland bio since, like, bush was in office. but i remembered i had this and have been updating regularly. the username is dark and the password is truth.
from life-my-way :
Happy birthday dear danger, happy birthday to you!!! Enjoy your apple pies and don't catch that bug from the wifey (as I cleverly have done from my spousey). I hope this is your best year ever but, under the circumstances, I just hope we all survive to see another extravagant sponge cake someday. Someday. Happy happy oh my friend!
from catsoul :
Happy Birthday Man! One is never ever too old to celebrate birthdays or anything else! Do it up in style when your special someone is better. Take Care. Here is to another great year of your awesome writing. =^..^=
from gr8legs :
your posts do tickle me!! lol @ "my choice of orifice" 1/27/17
from kelsi :
Happy birthday! Somehow I just typed that as 'butthdat', which my phone knew to correct to 'birthday'. Those apple apple pies look awesome!
from mistfree :
LOL - grits to you! And never a dull moment in your house is there? Would you consider a Live Cam? Oh pleeeease?
from cloudy-night :
You and your wife seem like the kind of people that I'd never get bored with.
from kelsi :
You should get a show!
from alethia :
By the by, I can't help but feel you had a hand in making up the names for the wax blocks...:D
from alethia :
I know it's a bit late, since there's other solutions now, but she might try softening the edge of the glass holes with a bead reamer. (Heh. Reamer.)
from kelsi :
You two are either the fanciest, most learned and sophisticated people living in some mountain castle, or you're hillbillies living with raccoons out in the wilds, I can't decide which.
from gr8legs :
this was extremely entertaining to read! 1/25/17
from mistfree :
So, hope you don't mind, but I shared a few statements from your 1-21 with my girlfriends Monday night! They've heard me mention your entries before and how on point they are. We all say Thank you! And....now you know you've got an informal fan club down South. And they don't even read blogs! Bless their hearts!
from acuteapathy :
Thanks a lot for that!
from papotheclown :
Thank you. It really does mean a lot.
from misfitstray :
thank you :)
from kelsi :
No I didn't know you could save the worm skins! Now I do! Too late!
from alethia :
SPAM.
from gr8legs :
this is the best entry i've read in ages! Thanks!! 1/21/17
from barefootruby :
The stories of me being a div are the best parts of my life!
from misfitstray :
I would bet that your phone is trackable as any other phone in the world...
from yellow-ninja :
Well, I appreciate your anger on my behalf. Though it's colossally unfair and ridiculous, it is apparently just part of What I Have to Deal With this year. Fingers crossed that next year they shuffle evaluators again, and I get one of the other six administrators, all of whom seem to live in this reality where I'm a good teacher who doesn't deserve this shit.
from misfitstray :
So, how much was that "new" phone you bought? I would guess that they are rather expensive as they are antiques. Like with record players. They would cost 50 bucks upwards in medieval times, now you can't afford to break your old devices as it would bancrupt you now to buy a new one. I can't understand why you are against new smart phones. They can be used just for calling as you like it. You don't have to use any of the other benefits it would have... Oh, and too late, my hair is cut short! Whoohoo!
from kelsi :
Thanks for the pep talks, Elbows (although your high praise for my writing and disparagement for yours are both silly). I yield to your pressure and will pursue the dream job. Great.
from aryssa90 :
Thanks! I hope I get the job too. More money is great and in these uncertain political times I need to be as middle class as possible. Hey mister, I need a lemon bread recipe. Or, you can just make me some lemon bread because I'm cute and constantly in some state of emotional turmoil?
from catsoul :
Thanks for the note man. I wrote that poem for my neighbor friend's wife across the road. She is dying from cancer. She starts chemo again on the 20th, and she wanted to come up here one more time while she still felt somewhat with it. So I have been thinking about her alot, and one night just recently I wrote that to her, for her, and then I took it over to her and we talked about it. She told me that I got it and started bawling, so then I started bawling, then her husband started bawling. After awhile we stopped and then we all had a real talk about them. I was so appreciated to be included. She told me that she isn't worried about Mikey any more because she knows as long as I stay alive, I will watch out for him, she also included my husband in this. Wow. So there you go, you know the background to this poem. I also have pain, but not at all comparable to hers. Peace Out. =^..^=
from alethia :
He's from Hawaii. I don't pretend to understand the spam thing. I just kinda roll with it. :P
from eloira :
Ha, no worries! I did get a bit ranty about it so something lighthearted was appreciated :) Don't get me wrong, I'd love a phone I could sit and stare at for hours, but... You know... There are other ways to fritter time and money. It's just nice to hear there's someone out there still that spends as little on a phone as I and gets away with it!
from eloira :
I get the 'why don't you get a REAL phone' comments every time I walk into the workplace... By someone who can't keep a newfangled one operating for more than 2 months at a time no less. I'll stick with my trusty drop-it-and-it-still-works 2008 model. I, too, like to ignore people, so I hope you never have yours ring unannounced!
from cocoabean :
I didn't have a big enough container for the number of plums I bought, so I had to make one jar of slivovitz with premium tequila.. also ran out of vodka, so we use what we have. It is equally as good as the vodka.. just thought you'd like to know... *hic*
from cocoabean :
So I made some slivovitz, the 90 days was up today. It is so freaking amazingly wonderful I can't begin to describe it. Dude, you're the man!
from jimbostaxi :
After thinking about the cost of the gift card, I walked in to the nearest liquor store and told the guy to pick a bottle of wine that was 20$ bucks and sold the best. Fuck the details the less I know about it the better thanks again for your help.
from misfitstray :
Had to look up shofar... well, not what I expected but I could adumbtrate something but not that it would be something jewish. Are you circumcised? ;)
from yellow-ninja :
That's some pretty fantastically lazy package delivery. Maybe it was intentional - that guy/gal just wants to be fired so bad. "This time for sure!" s/he thought as s/he put the packages right where they could be demolished. I think the USPS around here gets a kick out of making me deliver the mail for them - I get my neighbors' mail and packages more often than what seems possible for innocent error and dutifully trot around delivering it. Nation-wide parcel/mail delivery conspiracy, I'm sure of it.
from aryssa90 :
Merry Christmas ya filthy animal. Just kidding. That was such a dick move for the UPS guy to do. WHo does that?! I've never delivered a package before (I much prefer to receive them) but I'm prettttyyy sure I don't have to go to package delivery school to know not to put it behind the car tires. Idiots. But hey, practice blowjobs!
from muffinhead :
Ugh! Healthcare. They really need to take the "care" out of it. Hope they sort that silly business out for you shortly. I also had a recent stint in breadland but mine wasn't as successful as yours. I have a tree full of Meyer lemons, THE BEST oranges you'll ever have in your LIFE (no joke) and White Grapefruits. The trees are about 80 years old and just dripping with fruit. I tried to make orange bread. It turned out tasting very orange-y but it was on the dryer side which baffled me. Take two will have to commence as there is just too much out there for me to resist and well, I can only drink so much juice...
from alethia :
Hey Gimpy. I hope you're getting less gimpy. We can't have a bake-off if your arms drop off, so try not to let that happen. Take care of yo'self. (I'm cursing the American healthcare system for you. I'm not sure why I care so much about it. Maybe it's like watching someone with summer tires try to drive up a hill on a snowy day.)
from bantenhut :
Those breads look fantastic! Also, I didn't go all Veronica Lake, but I finally cut my hair -- it looks very much like Hannah Hart's! :D My God, your liquid cat sounds hysterical! We humans could learn from her abundance of chill. As for the corgi video, I'm not sure if that's ZFrank or not! Just some instagrammer, maybe. I miss my corgis, too. The Corgo Dog breed is priceless. BTW, have you ever met a Great Pyrenees? They are pills, apparently, and I'm trying gradually to adopt a great pyr mix at the moment. Been volunteering at a local shelter, and I have fallen into doggie love! Also, can you make videos instead of typing? That would be far less elbow pain, right?
from yellow-ninja :
Dang. I don't even eat bread, but I would endure the sure-to-be spectacular gastrointestinal fireworks that would ensue for either of those. Nice work. Sorry about the bum wings still giving you hell. Insurance is the worst.
from nineofswords :
Of course bread is mightier than soup. Any day of the week. Oh, how I love bread.
from candoor :
Oddly rounded applause for the latest story of your adventures in life. Save your hair, get another cat and dog.
from nineofswords :
I don't know if you have a Costco anywhere near you, but they make this cranberry walnut crusty rye bread that is absolutely to die for. (That is a literal statement for some of us.) If you love German breads, you should try it. I bought one the other day because it was fresh out of the oven and I just could not pass it up. It's like, in the top 5 best things I ever et.
from astitchaway :
While no one enjoys eating a mouse turd, I love that New Wifey got one over on you. I'm not sure if you've tried it yet, but peppermint oil on the opening where they are coming in usually keeps the little buggers out. They hate the smell.
from alethia :
I just thought you should know, I bought a brand new lime green Kitchenaid Pro mixer for $300. That's Canadian dollars. That's like $20 in real people money. (I'm feeling really smug about it, if you couldn't tell.)
from nineofswords :
Did the mouse turd not add a peppery bouquet that danced delicately over the tastebuds, leaving an oaky essence and crisp finish in its wake? Was it Hanta flavored? You've taken culinary daring to new heights. Well done!
from bedbunny :
My bad, apparently my head was so far up my arse that i forgot to update for 13 months.. I'm back and boring as ever! Bravo on eating the mouse shit though... I still can't work up the nerve to complete said task and check it off my bucket list. Also, did she fall for the ToiletTrap(tm)? You may have left a note for someone else post-entry, but I know spirits can communicate in the afterlife.
from muffinhead :
Dude, I just can't pretend. :-)
from kelsi :
Well thanks for making me cry, man.
from misfitstray :
As you wrote me a note I assume that your wife didn't kill you - so far. Thank you NewWifey(TM) :) Now on to your note. Do you really think that any man is worth to get in shape for? I will get in shape, but only for myself as I don't feel comfortable with my current state. And I will win that date! Come hell or high water!
from kelsi :
I too thought there would be green irradiated dead mouse bodies lining the house, but there wasn't - we had a lot of work done in the eaves this spring, pulling up floorboards etc. and there were no dead mice. Magic! The puppy is 4. He's a fun dog, always super into whatever he's doing at the moment, whether it's lunging at squirrels through fences or trying to rip tree roots out of the ground with his teeth or face-planting while catching a frisbee - hence the lack of teeth.
from swordfern :
LOL! I loved this story. I really thought that the turds were going to be from the box of tomatoes...
from yellow-ninja :
Yes, it was a doozy of a week. But it's over, and Steve claimed in my meeting he "probably" won't even review me next semester, which typically means he's giving me my passing grade and moving onto bigger and better things. That's illegal, due my probationary status (first three years in any district are considered "probationary"), but c l e a r l y Steve knows better than me on everything, so we'll see.
from bantenhut :
Casey the Wonder Corgi! An apt title for any corgi, as all corgis are truly wondrous. Wait, your cat had NO BONES? How did that work? -- I googled the famous lady you commented about. Cool. Tres glamorous!
from muffinhead :
Sorry dear, but you did deserve that glue trap on your head. I get why you thought it was a good alternative, but suffering in any of its forms for a living creature isn't cool mister! Get some barn cats! Anyhow. Thanks for the support, despite my not giving mine. Heh. (Sidenote: I love America's Test Kitchen in all its glorious forms.)
from kelsi :
I have had good luck with poison. For mice. I know it's terrible but I don't have to deal with poor little furry dead mammals - they just magically disappear. Poor monsters. :(
from yellow-ninja :
First of all, hantavirus! And second, how long do you think it'll take NewWifey to remarry one she disposes of the evidence?
from whystinger :
I deliberated in my head as to whether to name Stepfie in what I wrote. Like you, I am not sure she wanted the attention, but I decided to indicate it was her anyway and I think she would have approved anyway. I think she was rather private about the cancer as she didn't want others to worry and trip all over themselves not knowing what to say. I am particularly bummed as I may have had the chance to meet them in 2017. As her sister told me "She was keen to meet her correspondents."
from gr8legs :
Hey, i got your note about voting independent voting. thank you so much for informing me of history. i did do a google search just to make sure before i wrote my diary entry and the results that i checked reflected what i ultimately wrote. go figure that google is indeed sometimes incorrect :) hope you are doing well.
from aryssa90 :
Hold on. I just read this entry and literally broke down crying. I didn't have any way of talking to her outside of Diaryland and so I didn't get this. Are you on her facebook? I'm totally gutted right now.
from integrating :
Thanks for the note. I'm working on hangin in there.
from comebacktome :
Poor fucking Stepfie. Vale to a hilarious, kick ass, all around awesome woman. I am raising my boobs to her in tribute right now (I think she would have liked them).
from misfitstray :
yeah, you might be right about Buthan. It has a very reasonable, wise king. Besides that it is one of the most beautiful countries in the world. But nevertheless, I think that even there are people going to bed hungry and the school and health system sucks 10x.
from annanotbob2 :
Thank you Danger. I've got to go out but I'll be back as I'd like to explain what's occurring more fully. I'll post this here and on my page - fucking Diaryland is not encouraging of dialogue
from yellow-ninja :
Yep. About half the country feel this way. It's small comfort. My kids are terrible because they live in the reddest county in our blue state. Poor things.
from mistfree :
Agreed. Still a little in shock over the results. Avoided all social media til today. Gym and Netflix were my two biggest heroes!
from integrating :
Thing is, I live in a very rural area and need wheels. Just don't know how he will react if it comes to that again.
from catsoul :
I wasn't alone. I was outside for 6 hours raking and communing with Mother Earth. Walked the dogs. Really you are only alone if you think you =^..^=
from narcissa :
my new plan: binge watch The West Wing on repeat until 2020
from misfitstray :
Bring wifey!
from barefootruby :
Just when we thought election results couldn't get worse, the US play the trump card
from integrating :
I've been watching MSNBC. Trump seems like he's thinking, "What have I gotten myself into?" I can't believe all the protests around the country! I had no idea!
from integrating :
P.S. I think they should do away with electoral votes. She did win the popular vote, as did Gore.
from integrating :
You got that right. Now that the Republicans control everything they have no one to blame but themselves. It's over and they're still talking shit. I'm going to go off the friggin grid, lol. Seems to be the only alternative.
from buffylass :
Sorry about Trump, my friend. Over here, me and my friends went to bed anxious and woke up to disbelief and worry. In other words, very similar to Brexit! Hope the fall-out isn't too horrific for you guys, though they feel like hollow words right now.
from narcissa :
yeah i think it's worse in a lot of ways. Certainly in terms of sheer numbers affected. So sickening. I can't really even comprehend it, tbh.
from misfitstray :
Glad that you are still alive! Man, it's no wonder that your elbow isn't healing when you have to change, butter and clean the containers for your food that often. Jeeeez! The bread pudding looks pretty fine to me. As long as it tastes good the looks are of no importance. You are allowed to come by and cook for me.
from eloira :
I love the fact that your throwing-things-in-a-tin approach works, whether it sounds like a good idea or not! Crap picture or not (looks fine to me), you fed people. That's a success! Ahh, the trick-or-treaters didn't pester whatsoever. Shame - I still have sweets that need disposing of... Glad you're feeling a little more mobile!
from jimbostaxi :
I'll try and do a better job of explaining The Who what and where so I can get more Dangerspouse notes because that word salad stuff makes it sound like I have a mental disorder,, who knows maybe I do and it's just not diagnosed but I do appreciate the note and the heads up :0)
from jimbostaxi :
Hahahaha you know something DS I was just thinking about leaving you a note and you beat me to it, I see your notes all over Dland and I kept wondering when's that porn loving MFer coming back my way. I know your crippled and all now with the surgery so do you pay and intern to jerk you off when wifeys out of town? But on a more serious note I think it's a good program to start and I hope to eventually expand it to other locations ,, that's if it all goes according to the plan. Now let me get back to moving my horsey thing ! Thanks for the note Danger wish me luck :0)
from aryssa90 :
I got a Buick Encore. I haven't officially decided on a name but I'm leaning toward so Alan Alda. I believe I have Ebola or some version of the plague but I'm alive. How are your elbows? Are you trying to get rid of your porn because you're too tempted to jerk it?
from kelsi :
I'm not kidding about the wagon wheel pasta. At first I thought it was a fluke but now I think it's a sign that I'm living in some bizarro alternate universe.
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks, hon x
from yellow-ninja :
Glad it's taking the edge off! When my jaw wouldn't open for 6 months in high school, they gave me Celebrex, too. It let me spend a lot less time crying miserably, for sure. Here's hoping something works!
from yellow-ninja :
Never. My children love me. Glad to see you updating/commenting again! The elbows are tolerable?
from kelsi :
So glad you're back, this place was so looooooooonely without you! Hope the elbow's better. Pain is painful.
from kelsi :
I got a TEAC TN-300, black. Audiophiles will scoff but they'll scoff at anything. So far this thing is perfect for me. And I didn't spend a thousand bucks on it. I'm not using the built-in preamp so can't comment on that.
from aryssa90 :
porn. always porn.
from melodymetuka :
Good to hear from you, glad you're on the mend. That bread pudding sounds like a lot of fun, I hope you enjoyed it. P.S. now I've got an infection in my right hand. *sigh* Because typing wasn't hard enough.
from msafire :
Thank you for writing! I can always count on your entry for a good laugh!
from whystinger :
Yes, PSA level went up again, but evidently it can be raised by blockages from enlarged prostate. I may be a candidate for the same type of surgery using the tiny knives. Still could be another issue, but have to investigate more first.
from annanotbob2 :
Yay! x
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks - going to try that tonight x
from whystinger :
What ever happened with your prostrate challenges? Did you have surgery or did they put you on medicine? I am curious. I am facing similar challenges again...
from alethia :
The worst part about Brian is I've known him for, like, sixteen years at that point, and I'd always felt perfectly safe around him. %100 safe. Until that night. Also, your bread pudding looks acceptable and I would like to shove some in my face. And the other day I was in a Value Village the other day and found a seven cup Cuisinart food processor, with all the accessories and everything...and it wouldn't power on. Those FUCKS. I was getting SO ready to be all smug in your notes. Also I'm glad you haven't had your arms amputated, even though robot arms would be pretty cool.
from integrating :
Haha! Yeah, she's in AZ and he's in MT. Countdown to Friday.
from annanotbob2 :
Nov 2 - I know, we all did. She was fantastic, a marvellous bloody woman. xx
from swordfern :
LOL. This reminds me of puberty... First I'm like YAAAAYYY and then I'm like UUUGGGGGHHHHHH. Need some of that bread pudding stat. :)
from nineofswords :
It occurs to me that I know an awful lot about your wife's pooper and pee-er. Thanks for sharing. The bread pudding looks divine.
from kelsi :
Ugh, come back, elbow schmelbow - no one ever updates anymore.
from shortst101 :
hey you.....how are you doing? Just dropping in to check in on you.....been a long time! gonna go read some of your diary. I'm still alive and kicking. I am at a new job now. have been here over a year. They are good people. I'm very lucky.
from yellow-ninja :
:( I like the button, but not that your convalescence is still going poorly. So sorry you're dealing with that!
from mistfree :
Heal damn you! I miss your entries. And notes. :)
from nilliem :
STOP F'N TYPING. (the contraction is for me trying to prove to my almost 16-year-old that cussing is not necessary. Can be used for spice; but who the heck wants too much clove in...anything??)
from alethia :
Have I suggested robot arms yet? I probably have. I still recommend them. They have helped me dominate most of western Canada. They could do the same for you! But stay out of my turf, or we're gonna have a robot arm war.
from alethia :
Have I suggested robot arms yet? I probably have. I still recommend them. They have helped me dominate most of western Canada. They could do the same for you! But stay out of my turf, or we're gonna have a robot arm war.
from cocoabean :
Hell, I'd even take Nixon! If he wasn't dead, that is. Heh.
from barefootruby :
I can't believe that a country the size of the USA can't produce two better candidates. After all, here in UKland we've got a choice between ... hang on, let me think this through a bit more.
from peggypenny :
What? left you a diary entry. over and ouch. yeah no, fine.
from misfitstray :
I'm sorry that your convalescence isn't going as you wish. I hope that thngs will turn a lot better for you soon. *hugs*
from peggypenny :
How goes your stint?
from yellow-ninja :
Yikes! You're basically just a mobile torso now! Lots of takeout from now on. Sorry about your double bum elbows. :(
from mistfree :
Egads! So....what are you going to do now? Can you hire someone to give you a hand? Oooh if I were closer, I'd apply! I can by very helpful. And apparently I do a lot of charity work. Oh oh oh.....Then I can say I was hired to do a hand job. Ha! Hand-job! Ok, seriously.... what now? And don't sweat the weight. You're a guy. You'll lose it quickly once everything is back in motion. Guys suck like that. (PS. I don't expect a reply since you are limiting your typing. Unless you just can't help yourself ;) - or unless someone else already got the hand-job and is typing for you now)
from aryssa90 :
Take care of yourself! 11 pounds or 15 pounds, you till give good diaryland entry ;) Also, this is the impact you have had in my life: There are two coworkers who have diverticulitis and whenever I say it out loud I literally pronounce it "diverticuliiiitis" and then I get strange looks. I'm glad I met you ;)
from melodymetuka :
Take care of yourself, heal, then get rid of the weight. One thing at a time. I know how impossible it is (a doctor once told me to stop lifting when I had two preschool children and a new baby. Where do they get these ideas?), but your arms have to get better so you can do all those wonderful things that we love you for. ;-)
from naomibeth :
You asked, so your username is dangerspouse and your password is password. I mostly locked it to keep out ex-husbands. lol. I should probably quit acquiring those.
from kelsi :
Ugh, get off the computer, this hurts to read.
from integrating :
I'm like Frankenstein when I see pictures of your food. uuuu....uuuuu
from catsoul :
Here's an idea....they make voice activated programs for the computer. You speak and it writes what you say. Now about the driving, can you car pool, ok, well you would be the passenger. If you are serious about not back peddling and re-injurying your other elbow, you better commit to NOT doing what your doctor says. Sorry man if that sounds like a mom, but come on, you are only given two hands, two wrists, two elbows, you get the idea. =^..^=
from kelsi :
Thanks for all the notes, Note King! I have sprayed the powdery mildew but it's a wily adversary and proliferates despite my best efforts. My best efforts, unfortunately, come in fits and spurts, so that's probably why the powdery mildew is winning. :( Dairy Queen is so low in fat it's practically a health food. Good idea, I'm going to go get a Blizzard today. That'll fix things up.
from muffinhead :
ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY AGREE punditry must DIE (Because a lot of people have no clue where that line is)
from muffinhead :
I love your stories about cooking. I've never had the pleasure to use saffron or vanilla beans. I guess not because I can't technically afford them but because like the potential addict that I am (is why I've never drank, I have addiction in my blood and I know it, hence my caffeine and sugar addictions) I don't need to start another expensive habit.What I've never known won't bother me. On the media. You and I will have to agree to disagree. You work for media, I work for LE so we will likely always argue our positions (reasonably and without raising our voices *smile*) I *know* that there are those seemingly very few media sources that DO only report cold hard facts. If you are among those I commend and thank you. The real matter is that one DOES have to dig for them. Inflammatory reporting is front and center and the simple fact is hummanity is lazy and will take the easiest source above looking for what is real. I guess you can also say I'm taking the easier road by using what is front and center but it is what MOST people see/hear. You point out NPR but I counter with it depends on where you are(and I do listen to NPR among others, just not lately). My area, fairly liberal, hence my NPR (barring some of the National Shows) reflects that liberalism. If I were in a more conservative area, it would likely reflect that. So because people seem to want to Burger King their media outlets and get it their way media sources bend to their audiences. I get it. It grows their followers. However, I don't want labeled news. I want facts. *I* will determine in my own mind how to label them and what I think. I don't want to be spoon fed someone's opinion and I certainly don't need the internet comment pages and the twitter feeds rolling along the bottom of my screen. I have a friend that believes the only way to get the most unbiased news about the USA is to watch another country's news. I'm starting to think he's right.
from integrating :
Yeah, I can't drink because of the meds I'm on, but I sure do look forward to that swig of wine every Sunday. :D
from mistfree :
Ha! You know, I may have to update today's entry to add that I in fact, did NOT let her feel my boobs. Not that I'm opposed. Who doesn't like to squeeze a boob. I feel myself up all the time. Stress balls. And I'm not stressed. Not today anyway. Oh right, I'm having that beer now.
from kelsi :
New entry, motherfucker!
from misfitstray :
Deal! Bring lots of slivowitz!
from jimbostaxi :
$500 and ounce wtf? A friend of mine dabbles in cooking and said you need a reputable place to buy it because people sell you fake shit!
from barefootruby :
heat vs. temperature is also the "magic" behind those walking on hot coals stunts - nothing to do with mind over matter. I also have to explain in when covering burns in first aid classes and get asked "wouldn't ice cool it down more quickly than water?"
from jimbostaxi :
that's it I'm giving up cab life and selling dime bags of Safron!
from alethia :
I word good. :D I think about it occasionally. I do write a bit, like novel type stuff, but the trick to getting something published is having it finished. Which I do not. But I daydream about it.
from whystinger :
That was a fucking lot of saffron, you lucky bastard! Better get more in case I do visit the old area of NY/NJ in December or spring of '17
from nineofswords :
Well, you lucky saffron eating duck.
from cloudy-night :
I don't know what saffron is, but I thought that was sort of rice. Is it really that expensive? Guess I gotta google it.
from yellow-ninja :
I forget that you're basically like a culinary Thoreau out there on Walden Pond. Bears love saffron, I hear.
from nineofswords :
It is time to hit up the friend for a refill on the Saffron barrel...
from mistfree :
Now I'm hungry for chicken. I'd probably eat the shrimp too even if they were like rubber balls. Heh - rubber balls. I just don't have many opportunities to eat shrimp with the hubby allergic. So I'd chew on a couple till I got tired of chewing.
from narcissa :
that looks AMAAAAZING
from misfitstray :
Hm, looks good, I'd eat that too, minus the shrimps. The saffron doesn't look a lot like saffron. Shouldn't it look more like needle-thin orange-red worms?
from integrating :
Oh, thanks for the note. Yes finding the Catholic channel has reminded me why I need to go to church. I don't know why I've been avoiding it. Probably because I feel uncomfortable going alone.
from kelsi :
Of course new moisturizer is a thrill, but would be even more thrilling if the announcement subject line was "New moisturizer, motherfuckers!" THAT would be thrilling. Hope your elbow gets better soon and starts bending and extending as it ought without pain!
from integrating :
I'm coming over to your house and you WILL feed me.
from yellow-ninja :
That's my favorite comment about my profession. Other than "my taxes pay your salary", of course. Holy shrimp! That risotto looks bomb. I'm sure there are some homebound oldies in your neighborhood who'd love for you to bring your delicious meals around to their houses. And kudos on your very sound techniques for teaching people the science of heat. I've got my oven warming up right now.
from nineofswords :
The moral of the story: We may not be able to smuggle artists from behind the Iron Curtain anymore, but you can always smuggle plums.
from eloira :
Ahhhh, Slivovitz! Takes me back to some memorable times visiting friends in the Czech Republic... Homemade is pretty lethal, but got to be done at least once in your lifetime!
from catsoul :
Oh my god, I am Polish. I speak Polish. I so remember eating so many plum dishes my grams made in Warsaw, ND. We had to speak Polish while there because their English was not so good. I still speak fluent Polish and can read Polish. I have all my grams recipes and cookbooks. I talk to my pets in Polish a lot. Thank heavens I traveled a lot while younger before the health issues. Saw the farmstead that my dad's mom and dad lived in before they came to ND. So I got so excited reading your entry from today(9/23/16). Thank you for bringing me some awesome memories. =^..^= P.S. On my FB page I sometimes post old photos of the them and Poland. I look so much like my dad's mom and his grandma, the dark hair and eyes, well now I am going white. So thanks so much again. Keep cooking Polish.
from mistfree :
I'm all about plum spirits! Tried Kleiner Feigling (Plum Vodka?) about 5 years ago from a German girl passing out shots at weekend bash. Amazingly delicious! The vodka, not really the girl. Slivovitz is a new goal.
from bantenhut :
1. So it would be National Conception Day. Okay, I'm sure people would be down with that. 'Conception' is a pretty bland word, easily morphed for the wee ones not to realize. 2. I have not yet had a chance to watch the video with Abba's "I am the City" yet. It is a plan for the near future! 3. You seem very well-rounded. City bustle, bucolic cottage, life from both sides now. Cool! 4. It IS more fun if I believe every word of your diary! 5. EWWWW @ your arm. Put some foo foo juice on that egg salad. 6. I'm glad you like "Just the Tips!" It's a show I go back to repeatedly if I'm in a bad mood. They are an amazing cross between lazy and former grad student that makes me smile. Intelligent, yet not obsessed with perfection. They are BFFs, and there for each other. That's good for people to see. 19. Four sisters? WOW! 20. I've never heard of the Skinnerian technique. Interesting! So when the watchful (vicarious learning) pigeon stopped seeing the original pigeon get rewarded, did it stop pecking the lights? 21. I'm glad you're a feminist, and don't believe that there's any difference aside from upper body strength. But I can't get on board with pornography. It's not good for women -- period. I'm not saying I've never viewed it, but it's putting us back in the goddamn dark ages. And yes -- your wife may watch it, as you've written. I just don't see it helping the cause of equality -- not at all. Perhaps I've poked a bear, perhaps we can agree to disagree! Anyway, see you next time on Longest Note Ever, friend! :)
from buffylass :
Oh no, you lampooned me! It is to do with unions and stuff - curses!
from buffylass :
Beta blockers are God's gift to mankind... I miss them SO much. the Don't Wear White thing does make sense now, albeit in a weird, illogical way as obviously sex does not always equal labour etc etc. Will now genuinely go read the Wikipedia entry on it - who decided what date it should fall on? Is it the same day every year or does it depend on the moon etc like Easter?
from muffinhead :
My friend you need to get on YouTube and watch Motor Trends Subaru BRZ vs Ford Mustang head 2 head episode (7). It puts it up against a Mustang V6 and does very well against it. And yes, the Scion is going to be come the Toyota 86 in 2017, and the BRZ is engineered with Toyota. However, I'll be updating soon, with what will likely be what I get next.
from life-my-way :
Dave's Killer Bread is some new, organic bread that's baked here in Tuscaloosa (and so is available for $3/loaf instead of $7/loaf at the bread store). For bought bread, it's not too shabby. My enthusiasm for crate training is unparalleled, and this newest pack member will be trained to a crate if it's the last thing I do (and since he is clearly the brains of our pack, it may well be the -next- thing I do). Heard great things about clicker training, but the degree of coordination required to make it happen is just out of my reach. For now. I've plans to practice some of that today. Bosco is my sixth GSD, so I'm rusty but not inexperienced. Also, he is the most GSDog of the bunch (chill, curious but not obsessed, indifferent to most distractions (screaming children, ASD neighbors, other dogs barking, etc), great problem solver, the works). I'm hoping this means he'll continue to train as well and quickly as he has been doing thus far. If we can get recall sorted, we're all good. If not, there's a well respected group near by who train working dogs for police, NSA, TSA, Border Patrol, and they take and train personal pets, too. They also board these behemoths, which is a miracle as vet boarding never really has enough room for the big breeds. How's the convalescing coming along? Sending well wishes to your elbow. Thanks for the notes; I love the notes!
from buffylass :
Thank you :) and I'm so glad you've gotten your arm back again, albeit in a weakened state. Finally, is THAT what Labor Day is actually about? I thought it must be something to do with work and unions or something. In that case, what's the whole deal with not wearing white after Labor Day?
from nineofswords :
Upside to aloneness: You don't have to share your well-seasoned grilled meats. I didn't BBQ a thing for the holiday and now I see the error of my ways.
from jimbostaxi :
Geez, good thing I didn't put something about touching your meat hahahaha
from raven72d :
The brand sounds worth tracking down!
from yellow-ninja :
Ooo, dang. That looks delish. But I wonder if you had the same trouble I did after my second shoulder surgery: I grilled a beautiful steak, sat down to eat it, and realized I couldn't cut it with only one hand. Of course, I just ate it like a caveperson by tearing bites off after spearing it on my fork, but it made me sad.
from catsoul :
Your grilled meal looks so delicious. Lucky you. No leftovers, guess that is your substitute for Wifey!! When is she returning? Hope soon. Take Care Man. Chill. =^..^=
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks dude that means a lot coming from you! And might I say in a strictly heterosexual way that your wiener looks big and juicy !
from kelsi :
I've made a couple batches of pickles - hot and sweet, and dill. I'll do more pickles but I can only eat so many pickles, you know? But the stuffed Australian cucumber sounds like a great idea! I'll try that with some kind of quinoa salad. Thanks!
from bantenhut :
Does your arm smell, or just the cast? Crazy. Glad you're not trying to type whole new entries! After that last entry, I really don't know what to believe about your life! A lot more of it must be made up than I had originally imagined. Although I can't believe much of it happened, your last entry had a nice circular way about it. Song -> Occurrences -> Callback to the Song. A flipping of the script. Neat! Hey, if you like the Katering Show (YAY!) you might like Just the Tips, starring a woman named Katie and a woman named Katy. They are also totally hilarious, just in a different way. Do you have any sisters? Do you think men who have sisters are more effeminate? Because honestly, that's a good thing! Man Stuff is overrated. So, vicarious learning? Is it intentional (like learning from helping your kid do homework) or unintentional (like you'll never forget some disturbing imagery.)
from eloira :
You could well be right, in which case I can look forward to a lifetime more of woodchip breakfasts...
from jarofporter :
hey, you're welcome to stop by for a beer or two, i don't care how you're dressed; no judgement here! just be sure to bring a cute single girl with you! (or, you know, single-ish, as stated in a previous note) :-P
from eloira :
No... Sugar instead, but how did it get to this?! Glad to hear you're out of the meccano!
from jarofporter :
oh, btw, congrats on getting out of the cast finally!
from jarofporter :
single? well, i guess it's alright if she has a g/f... or is in an open relationship!? ;-) why, got someone in mind? lol
from barefootruby :
No corgis - and didn't hear anyone speaking Welsh either :-( Speaking of which (corgis) reminded me that many years ago when I was a kid, our neighbours had a corgi and we had a young cat. the fence between the properties had long-since fallen apart but the animals knew where the boundary was. They would walk up and down the boundary, nose to nose, neither daring to step foot into the other garden.
from misfitstray :
It's just that I'm always comparing and I think I'm ranking at the bottom. I guess you are 2 handed by now. Congrats and yay! for those millions of options you could do now again with 2 hands. eg kneading bread dough
from yellow-ninja :
There were so many options on making fun of your shirt, I didn't even know where to start.
from jimbostaxi :
Hahaha I don't think I can do that to fine Italian craftsmanship maybe if I Douche them to get rid of that not so fresh smell after every use :0)
from melodymetuka :
Mazel tov. Enjoy having hand freedom.
from catsoul :
9/1/16...Hello....I bet you are over the moon about freeing up the arm. It has a lot, I mean a lot of things to catch up with, wink, wink!!!! Anyhoo, so glad for you. I wonder what the first thing you are going to do? Take Care Man. =^..^=
from bantenhut :
You're back to swinging your metal detector! Look ma, two hands! Okay, nevermind, that doesn't work at all! Unless it's mamacita or something, and that's really a niche crowd. Nice motorboat joke, bahaha! I see motorboats all the time at work. At a marina. LOL. I guess that means they're officially not sexual to me? But was motorboating ever appealing?! Bahaha! Say, what does an Experimental Psychologist think of the Enneagram? Are you familiar? I promise not to engage you in long conversation about it. :D No, really -- I just enjoy it, I'm not trying to convert you. I'm sorry you spent so long laboriously hunting and pecking! What do you do all day? Do you want a funny series to watch on youtube? There's one called The Katering Show that pokes fun at foodie culture, and food intolerance. Two aussie ladies, a script, some great facial expressions, and some terrible food. Also, lewd jokes. I hope you're recovering well, and giving yourself the rest you need!
from nineofswords :
Yay for 2 fisted masturbation! Congrats!
from yellow-ninja :
Hooray! One more day! Your picture gave me horrific flashbacks to my own time in the waist up cast - this was back in the dark ages(2002) when surgeons cut open people's backs to repair shoulder tears. Mine held my arm 90 degrees out at the shoulder, though. Super fun, that. Enjoy all your two-handed activities!
from jimbostaxi :
Dear Danger I've had stage fright afraid to call in the show since everyone at the job knows about the first call,, maybe I'll have a few beers and call In that should make for fun radio!
from cloudy-night :
so you're alone for a while? I don't think you're advertising for help in the right place, you should hit up craigslist -- just make sure to check in periodically so we know you're still alive. :P
from ninabean :
Unless that pantry is full of neverending hot Cheetos I cannot apply for the job... Though considering my fingers would be full of that delicious red powder I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want them near any of your bodily crevices.... (that's just a guess) Hopefully you'll manage alright and that elbow will be good as new in no time!!
from strawberrri :
Thanks for the note! Sister-in-law's dog has been ill the past few days (we had ollie's mum staying for the bank holiday til today so have been receiving almost hourly updates on its condition). The dog wouldn't eat or drink so SIL's neighbour "mad maureen" came over and French kissed water into the dog's mouth. Lovely. Another time we were over and said mad neighbour let the dog lick her face and mouth so much she proudly announced that her tonsils had had a thorough cleaning. *VOMIT*
from nineofswords :
I'll be right over. Oh wait... you are not able to cook.
from aryssa90 :
When I get back?! I'm going to swim in a sea if Irish dick when I'm there! Hot, hopefully thick, Irish dicks attached to cute boys who have even cuter accents! I'm going to have to buy some day of the week underwear to help keep them all straight.
from misfitstray :
I'll skip on that offer. But you had me until you mentioned "cooking". Sorry, no cooking for spouses. As I'm too lazy to go over to wordpress, a little comment on catpictures. Glad I didn't see any folded up toilet seats with the cat and all the red in your bathroom.
from nilliem :
Sorry, you'll have to fend without me. :) Helpless you may be, but you have a few years on the grandson. You will be fine! But, I second the Craig's list suggestion.
from yellow-ninja :
Post that shit on Craigslist. You've just described someone's dream job.
from whystinger :
No thanks to the sponge baths or the happy endings, but remember, Bush's Cocina Latina Beans have that authentic Latin flavor... oh shit, that commercial is playing through my head and must have slid out through my fingers. Of course, you may not get those commercials in NJ. I am, however contemplating a trip to the NJ and Brooklyn areas in December, but NewWifey should be back by then. If it looks like a go, I will let you know. How is the elbow? How about the plumbing in the nether regions? I had another PSA test and am on the "watch" again and may need another biopsy.
from bantenhut :
Yes. :/ No more four month waits on note replies on my side! Sorry to hear you'll be on your own for a bit! Maybe you can dig out the metal detector and really go to town? I hope your elbow is feeling better!
from jarofporter :
It's Halloween, a kid walks up to a house & a woman answers the door. "Oh you're a pirate!" She looks around... "Well, where are your buccaneers?" Kid looks at her & replies, "On either side of my buckin' head!"
from alethia :
My main trouble is that I have a double uterus. Nothing an OB/GYN can help me with. It's just a thing.
from alethia :
Ugh. I need a job.
from yellow-ninja :
Ok. So, since I'm real lazy about getting the meat off the bones and I throw all the skin in with the bones and chunks of meat I can't be arsed to remove, it's really more like a broth, even though the majority is bones? Regardless of what it is, it tastes really great again this batch. I'll reduce the cooking time, though, next go-round. Thanks for the expert advice!
from jimbostaxi :
Do you do sex shows for the mental midgets such as myself and my coworkers and how much do you charge? I figured I'd drop by your page since I hadn't seen you on mine welcome back! :0)
from eloira :
Hmm... True. Pizza and alcohol it is! Sounds like an uneventful first meeting. Hope the recovery is coming along - if tedious - and thanks for the uplifting anecdote on child education
from barefootruby :
Surely role play, not roll play. Though maybe "roll" is a better description ...
from muffinhead :
Yes .01% Don't forget it.
from cloudy-night :
Lol, you guys get caught up in some really effed up situations. Poor kids, I bet they were just staring in disbelief. My mom is fine, she'll be out of the hospital by Saturday (God willing). Oh and fear not, I'll never give up anime. If I did, I'd just end up watching a lot of porn. :P
from bantenhut :
Holy heck! You two are acrobatic! Hahaha! XD Thank you for all of the wonderful notes! Jeff Bezos, Founder and CEO of Amazon: ohhhh, I get it now. He's an Amazonian! Other stuff: 1) Yes, I have 10 titties, and that's EXACTLY why R stays with me. Phew! Thanks, genes! 2) I have never been to Buffalo, but I recently learned that it is the birthplace of Buffalo Wings. Go figure -- never would have guessed that. Chilly there, eh? 3) I really need to see Blade Runner! 4) Is experimental psychology a tough thing to find a job in? Because it feels damn meaningful, like you could go places with it. But what do I know? 5) Thank you for the pep talk telling me I'm good at pep talks! For the win! For the hoard! Fuck yeah! 6) Oh, dear. Thank you for putting up with my pumpkinseed fish note, that was a doozy. 7) Surely this is a long enough note. See you next time! :D
from integrating :
Thanks for the note. :)
from yellow-ninja :
Good to know! I landed on 8 hours (really more like 7) because the first time I did it, it just tasted weak at 4 hours and at 5 and at 6. But I'll take your professional advice to heart for my next batch! And man, those deaf kids really got an education when you came into town. A speech and a show!
from ladyofjazz :
24/08/16 Hahaha. Awkward position to be found in.
from narcissa :
bikes! i have so many. It's essential to have an every day beater bike I can ride to a show and park on the street and not worry about. When i first moved to new orleans it was right after Katrina so i built one from parts.. sweated it out in a warehouse near my new home, meeting people, testing out my new life. It's my favorite, I think I'll bring it with me when I pack up my life in New Orleans next week. I have one in Mtl too. I also have a couple of road bikes (a bianchi and a Trek) i picked up on craigslist for <250$ - one in New Orleans, one in Mtl. It's really kind of ridiculous. Too many bikes, too many homes.
from histamine :
thanks for the advice man, glad you think about those things enough to offer help
from strawberrri :
Yes! I will try to write before going on my honeymoon on 31st August :)
from cloudy-night :
Thanks for the note. After hearing that you had some of the same experiences, it gives me hope. And hey, at least I'm not the type of vegetarian that looks disgusted while you eat a cheeseburger or talk about how bad it is to treat animals like stock(keep my opinions to myself). Oh and I will never say, "I can't hurt anyone because I'm a vegetarian." Because I will hurt someone, lol.
from misfitstray :
Thanks for your notes. I can see you are getting better as the frequency of your entries are increasing. I'm glad. Btw. most birds don't have penises. Owls don't. Exceptions are ducks, swans, ostriches and rheas. But I do like the penis on your owl.
from peggypenny :
I am healing. I live on !!!
from barefootruby :
It did cross my mind as we got to the park that, as the younglings are ethnically Chinese and I am Caucasian, I'm obviously not related to them which might look a bit weird!
from alethia :
I made the ricotta. (Confession: I've made it before, but forgotten about it, especially since my cheese making book is still in storage.) I used your recipe. Then I made zucchini lasagna with red wine marinara out of it. It's amazing. :D
from cloudy-night :
There was an entry of yours that I read a while ago and that I never got to comment on. It's 15 Crystals and I thought that the whole prenup thing was sweet and I can't lie, I was a bit envious after reading it -- I don't think I'll find anyone who gets me like you two seems to get one another. I also like the story of how you proposed to her, that was great. I meant to tell you that I never got the chance to try the stir fried rice because I've been too lazy to get up and go to the Asian market. And I can't tell you which BBQ is better because I haven't eaten meat since 1997 ( other than the kind that come in ramen packets).
from nineofswords :
I've never even thought of eating ricotta cheese by itself, spoon & bowl. I only know it as an ingredient in Italian food. But now I am curious.
from kelsi :
Chill, bruh, you're free to start your own candy review blog, although it's a pretty tough field and it takes years of dedicated reviewing to get one the free candy list. Good luck! In the meantime, enjoy your wagon wheel pasta.
from narcissa :
and yeah, of all the ways your mind can fuck with you, hoarding is up (down?) there with the worst. She's doing okay.
from narcissa :
bike fixed! i got this, right? /// that elbow thing you've got going on sounds like pure torture, despite your usual good [albeit dirty] cheer. Hang in there however you have to do it, even if it involves colouring owls, which sounds like torture to me.
from jarofporter :
AH, but hope is the problem; having unrealistic expectations that things will improve is the most certain way to ensure disappointment/discouragement when they don't. "Attachment is the root of all suffering", to paraphrase. If I can accept that this is my life, I can't be let down when I die alone. See? It's logical! ;-)
from kelsi :
Thanks for the flattery, but you're not getting any of my free candy that I'll soon be getting from all the candy companies wanting me to review them! I don't share. Sorry.
from life-my-way :
Your notes (and your outstanding owl penis!) make my day--thank you. In other news, the John who's learning to cook is my 20 year old son (who cooks and cleans happily along while his 19yo girlfriend sits on the sofa reading her book). I see great promise in these young persons.
from comebacktome :
Best.Entry.Ever! Except perhaps for that story about your wife with the morons, whoops, MORMONS and the bukkake videos….okay, so second best story ever! But a very very close second ;)
from kelsi :
Mmm, cream of shallot soup sounds good! Too hot for soup right now, though, and I ate all the french bread anyway. But I'll keep it in mind and will give it a try in a few months!
from vxxen :
LOL thanks. I start at $25. But it's only temporary. For 3 months. I'll take it tho_ I hope they hire me!
from nineofswords :
Do not fear. I shant be offing myself. At least not on purpose. :-)
from astitchaway :
I love your sense of humor. It's great that you're doing what you can to make the best of your situation. Your wife is definitely going to get you back for this. Think a full week of oral sex. After you've bathed, of course.
from raven72d :
Merci! I'll definitely be taking a look! Chateaubriand has a serious retro allure.
from raven72d :
I saw Alphabet City in its heyday--- weird thing: it felt safer at two in the morning, when all the club scene kids were on the street than it ever did at six in the evening, when it was all post-apocalyptic wasteland. I have to try the salting trick with a steak. And...Chateaubriand! hadn't thought about that for years!
from life-my-way :
A Molnar is floodtide and/or his siblings/parents, for what it's worth. I hope you're convalescing comfortably and swiftly; you are missed.
from catsoul :
Thanks. I will miss the salad but not the after effects. Hahahahaha. I know I haven't gotten alot done. So how about you? Are you gaining strength in your elbow and arm? Are you doing PT now? Just wondering, how you are doing man. I just had to write about what happened so it got filed, and out of my mind. Never dwell and live in the moment, that is my motto. =^..^=
from alethia :
Oh yeeeah. I forgot Hobby Lobby was a thing. It doesn't exist here in Old Canadia. I'd like to tell you religious whackjobs don't exist here either, but they do. Mostly on communes and stuff, though. (I'd chose Michael's over Hobby Lobby too. I mostly resent Michael's because they have at least a %30 markup over other stores, but are also so convenient. Pricks.)
from barefootruby :
Nothing wrong with hunting and pecking. I've been doing it for years, and still getting away with it. Spellcheck usually gets me out trouble.
from alethia :
Ooooh. Lookit them pans! I often buy pans from thrift stores because I can easily tell whether they're going to hold up. My most recent acquisitions are two heavy aluminum 8" rounds, and a heavy aluminum bundt pan. Jelly roll pans don't turn up as often (or they're shitty worn out 'non-stick' pans, which I refuse to use). I hadn't thought about stainless steel, though I do patron restaurant supply stores. Regular cooking stores feels like going to Michael's for craft supplies (NEVER GO TO MICHAEL'S FOR CRAFT SUPPLIES). I'm mostly holding off buying new pans right now, because I just dropped So Much Money on new tools. So much, Dangerspouse. I feel poor now.
from alethia :
Not really, but I do fill it with cheese as often as possible. And alternately (and really the driving force behind the name) is I have a tendency to scream "FREEEEDOMMMMMM!!!" when ever I get behind the wheel.
from nineofswords :
Thank you. xo
from alethia :
One of the worst parts about my short stint on the cruise ship was not being able to cook. I hope that arm heals up quick. I'm ready with this robot arm, though, just in case yours turns gangrenous and falls off. Let me know. I'll be waiting! :D
from buffylass :
Congrats on the entry and wishing you a speedy recovery. Your shower schedule made me itch!
from nilliem :
So, I'll skip an NJ visit for a bit. :p Good to hear from you; here's wishes for a speedy (and complete!!) recovery.
from swordfern :
Thinking of you in this difficult (and smelly) time.
from integrating :
Hey if Sam can go 4 months, what's a couple of weeks? LOL, just kidding...hope you have a speedy recovery.
from narcissa :
i don't know.. one shower in twelve days? Seems like we should be sending the notes of support to your wife.
from life-my-way :
Oh Cheesy One, Hoping everything is going very well with your elbow. I am surprised by the impact the health of your elbow has on the quality of my life. This being the case, I need to ask that you please pull yourself together and begin again to deliver the life enhancing prose upon which many of us have come to rely. Living in Alabama, there are alarmingly few other items on my list of life enhancements, I can ill afford to lose DangerSpouse. Thank you for turning aside from the recovery process to hear my plea. On behalf of a grateful land, life my way
from life-my-way :
Oh Cheesy One, Hoping everything is going very well with your elbow. I am surprised by the impact the health of your elbow has on the quality of my life. This being the case, I need to ask that you please pull yourself together and begin again to deliver the life enhancing prose upon which many of us have come to rely. Living in Alabama, there are alarmingly few other items on my list of life enhancements, I can ill afford to lose DangerSpouse. Thank you for turning aside from the recovery process to hear my plea. On behalf of a grateful land, life my way
from astitchaway :
I hope your surgery went well and that your recovery goes smoothly.
from whystinger :
I hope your surgery goes well.
from misfitstray :
Here goes my idea of flying over to spend some very nice days with NewWifey(TM) while you are out. *sigh* Life is hard. Well, since I'm not coming in either way, I hope that you are on the way to get a lot better.
from catsoul :
So man, how is it going? I am sending you positive vibes your way. Quick healing. Take Care. =^..^=
from integrating :
Thanks for the note. :)
from papotheclown :
Though I am feeling a little better, I am going to pretend that I am not so that I can get some dirty jokes from you. So...**cough**cough**I feel faint. I think I have the vapors and etc., etc.
from kelsi :
Hope you got something good, like a glow-in-the-dark elbow, or one with a pocket that can hold a smartphone and some credit cards! Heal up well, dude.
from muffinhead :
Much obliged sir. Hope surgical maneuvers are precise and clean. Thanks for putting the seat down. Lids are closed in my house to avoid random cat diving. Plus it's equal opportunity. EVERYONE lifts and closes something on the toilet. If only the world functioned this way...
from nineofswords :
Be safe. Please don't succumb.
from raven72d :
I think I mean 15-20%, though $15-$20 less would be fine by me.
from yellow-ninja :
How do you know NewWifey and I wouldn't hit it off? JK, of course - you know I'm a confirmed bachelorette. Best wishes again for your transition to RoboCop!
from raven72d :
You have a point on Cloudy Bay. It's not hideously overpriced, but it is marketed at about $15-$20 more than it should be. I do want to try the Rabbit Ranch line, but it's hard to find in the States.
from jarofporter :
positive energy coming your way, man!
from eloira :
Good luck with Round 2!! That came up fast, or at least it seems like it (can't imagine how it feels for you though, in more ways than one)... Swift recovery from it all. Great there are peregrines by you too! Lovely birds and seldom seen here due to persecution. I love that they stick it to the egg thieves by nesting in the (slightly unstable to humans) cliff face...
from life-my-way :
Sending all the well wishes for a perfect outcome and speedy recovery from your surgery. Hurry back, we'll miss you, and my offer of transcription remains on the table. Get well! Return quickly, I miss you already.
from astitchaway :
You've got to love trying to be chivalrous just to come across as a pervert. Oh well. I hope the surgery goes well for both of you. Invest in an electric whisk. NewWifey might appreciate it :P
from scullerymaid :
Loved your comment!
from misfitstray :
All the best for your surgery! I really hope that everything will be good again afterwards. Pics are up...
from jarofporter :
in case you didn't catch it, there's a whole slideshow, 12 images, i think?
from kelsi :
Raspberry liquor, like with raspberries, sugar, and vodka? Or something fancier? Will definitely try it, there are raspberries coming out if my ears. ... Hope your elbow is doing okay! Along with the rest of you.
from raven72d :
You always need a separate room for the sheep. With a closet for the costumes. It's hard to always find the right plaid for the Scottish cosplay thing.
from yellow-ninja :
Right?! If it was actually a choice like some people think, I'd make it in a heartbeat. But alas, try as I may, I'm still (mostly) straight.
from peggypenny :
relax.
from barefootruby :
Oh and Boris in the government. Is this "give him enough rope and he will hang himself" or "keep your friends close; keep your enemies closer"? Or maybe Thereas wrote "Boris - FFS" on a notepad and it was misinterpreted
from barefootruby :
Alas, there is still a good proportion of the population who still don't see it as a mistake. But as you're in USLand and Waitrose hasn't reached there yet (hey, it's barely reached the north of England), I'll tell you. "She was probably a temp". Waitrose don't employ temporary staff.
from misfitstray :
I found a flyer of the blonde beauty downstairs in the entrance hall as she is personal trainer for my gym. I'll post a pic of her just as you wish with name and even a phone number on it that you could be able to pester her ;)
from annanotbob2 :
xxx
from nineofswords :
You make me laugh a lot. That is why I like you.
from astitchaway :
I'm not going to lie, those grilled peaches sounded delicious.
from catsoul :
hi there, thanks for the lovely note. As far as the BBB I have, I was diagnosed that around the same age as I was told I am a diabetic, so that was years ago. Then I got c-diff in 2006 and the bacteria got so bad it traveled up into the heart sac, so that bacteria pushed having BBB more into the limelight, so to speak. So it isn't really all that bad, you know, it all could have turned out a more dark crisis. So anyway, thanks for the lovely note, I greatly appreciate it and your words of kindness, it means alot. This too so will pass. Take Care. =^..^=
from sexonatable :
I had no idea anyone still read this ancient artifact! I was venting my frustraion with not being able to see my old entries. But now I know people care I will try and update more!
from astitchaway :
Your new grill sounds amazing by the way.
from astitchaway :
You're right. There's some point in the riches. Even if it's not the whole point. How have you been doing?
from annanotbob2 :
Do I think Theresa May... is a small-minded, hard-hearted, vicious right-wing bint? Why, yes, sir, I do. Her voting record speaks for itself - against people, in favour of corporations. Trying to take us out of Human Rights. Not Trump, but only because she's fiercely intelligent.
from alethia :
I learned how to make yogurt from my mom, the good old fashioned way. Put your milk/yogurt mix into a container. Put that contained into a bigger old ice cream pail. Wrap Christmas lights around the small container, inside the pail. Put the lids on. Wrap in towels. Plug in Christmas lights. Leave overnight. You either burn down your house, or have yogurt in the morning. C'EST MAGNIFIQUE!
from yellow-ninja :
Dispassionate. Totally. I assure you A) my girls are proportionate to my frame (and lovely) and B) I don't give even the tiniest rat's ass about what size anyone else thinks they are.
from catsoul :
Wow, agreed alot of respect to your wife's creative and artistic talents. Cross stitch is beautiful when done right. Oh the many talents of your Wifey. You two rock!!!!!!! Take Care. =^..^=
from jimbostaxi :
it's really fucking sad to die like that,,, he never understood that he had to eat better we all warned him but his famous last words were "this is on my yes list"
from muffinhead :
Thanks. I needed a chuckle.
from catsoul :
I have done all crafts at one time or another. I like to design and make jewelry. The jewelry started with doing macrame hangings and wall art way back when, then I started using the waxy thread to make macrame jewelry. My grandma taught me how to knit when I was around 6 yrs. old. So thanks for asking, and your interest. Do you need something created? I also make dreamcatchers and dangly things that hang like curtains over windows that make rainbows in the rooms. I write alot, write alot of poetry all around doing my outdoor and everything else tasks. I am an old hippie man. Peace Out. Take Care. Go hug a tree for me or hug many. =^..^=
from nineofswords :
LOL! My poor patient won't be ringing any doorbells for a while.
from yellow-ninja :
Yeah, I have no idea why my mom wouldn't think trail riding is fun!
from catsoul :
7/6/16....Hello. Thanks for the Harry Potter thought, though I have read and reread, then read again the series. I to also enjoyed it. I am thinking of reading something by Greg Iles. I think I spelled is last name correctly. Still haven't decided though. Have a great hump day, hump away. Take Care. =^..^=
from nineofswords :
Now I have to bleach my mind's eye.
from swordfern :
Thanks for checking in with me. Long update. I'm so torn. I'd probably advise myself to just get the breakup over with now. Stop prolonging the agony. 11 years of memories, photos, family integration. God, it's so hard to even think about.
from nineofswords :
Ok, you got me. I was really not wearing any pants because I am a wanton hussy and was waiting for the sprinkler guy, mailman, or wandering salesman to happen by... :-)
from nineofswords :
My pants were wet from the knees down from watering the lawn, so I took them off and before I could get some shorts on, I forgot I was sans trou, so I just went went around pantsless until it was time to go out again.
from alethia :
Well, OBVIOUSLY lasers. How else are you going to finish up creme brulees? With a kitchen torch, like some kind of PEASANT?! I think not.
from kelsi :
Oh, I knew that, but WHAT IF they decided to change that one day and they just happened to be listening to my show that day? WHAT IF. Also I was raised Catholic so there's no stopping my feelings of guilt. P.S. you can find Coffee Nut M&Ms at your finest local gas station/convenience store that doesn't get a whole lot of business - they were a limited-time thing and I think their time has passed, but luckily I work near a store where things don't exactly fly off the shelves, so they still have some. Well worth a multi-state search.
from kelsi :
The first time I played a song with a bad word on air, I confessed to it in my shift report. A few hours later the program director called me and I was sure he was going to fire me, but he didn't care. No one actually cared besides me. Still, whenever it happened, I was always a tiny bit worried that the FCC would come break down my door in the middle of the night and drag me off to Guantanamo Bay.
from alethia :
I hope your surgery goes well, and I only a little bit hope they chop off your arm and replace it with a rad robot arm.
from narcissa :
Jul 1 - *loved* your anniversary entry. Thanks for showing us how it's done.
from annanotbob2 :
Just read the message below and popped over there - yeah, cool. Bloody diaryland - we do love it, though it treats us so bad...
from annanotbob2 :
Just saying hi and happy anniversary for whenever xxx
from strawberrri :
What a fantastic read. Love the pics on your WordPress too :)
from nineofswords :
Happy Anniversary! It was diabolical of you to set up a deal in which you provide delicious gourmet meals every day, but she is not allowed to gain any weight. Well played Sir, well played.
from jimbostaxi :
Happy anniversary nice pics and good luck with your surgery!
from life-my-way :
Happy anniversary, you crazy kids! I admire the fabulousness of your union--had I realized it was (in part) a product of a carefully drafted contract, I ould have sought to emulate it long ago. Cheers and 15 more!
from nineofswords :
Being a Libra, I don't usually acknowledge the baser bodily functions such as the Epic Fart in question, however, this tale was entertaining on many levels with the cooking of dog chews into a soup for humans to eat and all the very amusing word-smithing. Very polished, for a fart story. LOL
from buffylass :
Thankyou so much :) that's very kind of you. It's been a bit rough but feels like the worst is now over!
from nineofswords :
Your "Silk Purse" entry on Dangerspouse Rides Again is a masterpiece of funny. Seriously good writing, Dude.
from barefootruby :
I agree. I wouldn't trust Johnson and Farage as far as I can throw them. The sooner Farage's grinning face is removed from our TV screens, the better.
from yellow-ninja :
One of the many joys of my job is torturing teenagers with terrible jokes. Annoying them is so easy, yet still so satisfying.
from misfitstray :
We should ride together some time. It would be fun.
from misfitstray :
Fencing, huh? That is a fine sport. You are a very versatile man.
from misfitstray :
Wow, and I thought you are only into motor-bikes. So, why do you have a tri bike? You did triathlon as well? I would love to get a full carbon-race machine but they are more expensive than a car. Though, no race-machine for me. And it would be a waste for me as I don't ride as much as I used to. In main training season I rode like 500-800km/week just with the tri-bike plus like 120km with my normal bike. I miss riding my bike/s - A LOT!
from cloudy-night :
Thanks, I'm definitely going to give it a try (probably Friday) and I'll let you know how it turns out. I'm going to head to the Asian market and get the soy sauce you recommended.
from misfitstray :
yeah, she definitely is a beauty. I love her. I bought it in 2009, already used but nevertheless good and reliable. You have a tri bike too?
from misfitstray :
tri-bike, see pic in entry.
from nineofswords :
I cannot say I will walk away from the Ramen forever, but I must for a time. Ah yes...Ramen and all my other carb-o-licious loves. That ramen bowl was truly magical.
from cloudy-night :
Hey man, your engagement story is my second favorite - after the guy who programmed Chrono Trigger ( effin awesome!). What I used for the fried rice recipe was: 2 tsp dark soy sauce, 1 tsp of light soy sauce (well, I didn't have any light, just added some more dark), some white pepper, a pinch of salt. It didn't turn out too well, I mean... it was salty as all, out fuck! Also, it wasn't dark brown like it is at the restaurants I visit. If you have any advice on how I can make it great, let me know! Thanks!
from barefootruby :
oh, and on your previous comment. Curry in the UK is becoming more sophisticated now, with better presentation. Not so much "give them anything as they're probably drunk anyway"
from barefootruby :
I was going to use a few lentils as well, but kind-of overestimated on the courgette and carrot
from barefootruby :
finely-diced courgette (zucchini), grated carrot, onion, a couple of tins of tomato and some random herbs (I always use random herbs). Grating the carrot was a stoke of genius - it gives a bit of "body" to the mixture. I added a bit of water, but would have used wine if I'd had a bottle spare. I drained the excess juice when it came to potato-topping time, and used that to make the gravy. When I drained the potato I left a bit of water in the pan to provide liquidity for the mash, and stirred in some chopped garlic and parsley.
from jarofporter :
yeah, i knew that, just let the disappointment get to me, i guess. sorry!
from jarofporter :
obviously you don't really read me much, or you'd know that i have no interest in 'nailing' someone if it's never going to go anywhere. think of me what you will... *shrugs*
from jarofporter :
see? it would be so much easier if i were bi, then it wouldn't matter. such is not the case though...
from comebacktome :
Who doesn't want more goats?!
from nineofswords :
What can I say? I'm a giver.
from kelsi :
Ehhh, I think Trump surrounds himself with people who mirror his hubris. It's "interesting" but I'm not going to bolster their egos any by believing their delusions as facts. I mean, if I find out they're behind the disappearance of the wagon wheel pasta (and I went to a different store last night which also didn't have any) THEN I'll quake with fear. Until then, though, nope - hands too tiny, not impressive.
from misfitstray :
Hope your surgery is soon and that you will feel a lot better soon and that you can do all those fantastic things again you write about over and over again.
from misfitstray :
Hm, what's new about men being whiny? All of them are. No exceptions! Well, maybe Henry Cavill isn't.
from catsoul :
Hope your elbow hurts less. Thanks for the note, I appreciate it. Still going on and Nurse Randy said that if I have another bad night he is taking me in. So my body better stop. I am do grungy/dirty to go into the hospital, like they care. Thanks again for your caring. =^..^=
from nineofswords :
I forgot to say that I am sorry about your hurty arm. I hope it gets resolved very quickly so you can painlessly accomplish all your typing and... other stuff... unimpeded. :-)
from nineofswords :
I have 2 comments: 1. I'm jealous about the Vietnamese food you cooked. I need it to get in mah belleh. 2. Even when you are innocently talking about flaming bananas and o-rings, it sounds dirty.
from portlypete :
Thanks very much for your note.
from yellow-ninja :
Ugh, waiting for surgery is the worst. I didn't want a sub teaching Hamlet, so I postponed my own shoulder surgery a few years back. The kids got a real kick out of the impromptu in-class demonstrations of what a dislocation looks like. Sorry you're dealing with what will soon just be soup at your elbow! Maybe I should call my cousin back and get some of that fungus coffee for you - I hear it's magic.
from jarofporter :
yep, back problems suck, but it's pretty 'par for the course' at this point. still getting by with that elbow issue well enough? hope you get it resolved soon.
from cocoabean :
I'm on some sort of call list, but the likelihood of an opening on a day off is pretty slim. That's what sick days are for. Trust me, I won't wait that long.
from comebacktome :
Here's to hoping that your surgeon gets his shit together to slice you open post haste and we have a return to our lengthy entertaining posts about goats, sexual debauchery, and kitchen aids (not necessarily in that order)...
from catsoul :
hi there.....you need to do something that doesn't use your elbow or hands. Your entry heading is, "Pussy," need I say more, I am sure NewWifey will go with that prescribed treatment plan, tonguing. Have fun! =^..^=
from jimbostaxi :
Now that's fucked up! :0) here's one back at ya If the pain ever gets too much and you want to end it all just play tapes of yourself on the air that's surely enough to make anyone kill themselve
from melodymetuka :
My sympathies on the pain - it really does make living impossible, doesn't it? Hope you will be able to tell us soon how well you are doing
from cocoabean :
I can sympathize.... I have a bum hand, the next available appointment is November.. I might just cut one of my fingers off, it might hurt less.
from narcissa :
oh good to know - i like to keep my options open in these things.
from integrating :
Mayonnaise? I didn't want the white bread, the mayonnaise nor the bologna. I think "take me out to lunch" meant completely different ideas and I still get irrritated every time I think about it. :P
from nineofswords :
I'm a dirty joke slacker. Here's one for ya: Q. What does Ms. Rudolph and the other reindeer wives do while Santa and the boys are out delivering gifts on Christmas? A.They go into town and blow a few bucks.
from narcissa :
no, man, it was a passing drunk thought. i haven't and I wouldn't, for real.
from nineofswords :
Yes, Second life is totally a thing. I haven't been in there much at all for the past few years, but I'm thinking of doing something in there. My ex made a huge amount of money in there as a content creator. I have a business in there too and it makes money, but not a whole lot of it. As for Blue Apron, I have been pleased with the quality. I've only had one mishap (partially frozen vegetable), but if you let them know something wasn't right, they refund you.
from narcissa :
no! you want A FRESH GULF SHRIMP WRAP WITH HOT SAUCE, DRESSED. and you really, really do want that.
from ninabean :
Uh, wordpress? As in there are other places where you share your brain nuggets?? I must find out more!
from wyndspirit :
Actually, I am starting to become active in the doll hobby community. I'm about to post an entry, not a final one or anything, with some links.
from alethia :
Only trouble with the marriage plan, is I want a visa for England, not the States. ;) It's actually fairly easy for Canadians to get work visas for the States, and vice-versa. England, not so much. THANKS, MOM.
from strawberrri :
My first two breakfasts were bagels and the third was sweet potato curry...so shameful...
from kelsi :
In real life I don't always talk about my periods - that would be crass - but I know everyone here likes to stay on top of this stuff.
from jimbostaxi :
That's a mouthful huh?
from narcissa :
HA, you think these exquisite gems can be found in New York?!! That entire experience was unique to New Orleans.
from integrating :
Thank you for the birthday wishes :)
from misfitstray :
Thank you! How is your arm? You have an appointment for surgery already?
from strawberrri :
Oh thank you so very much! :) I had a great day yesterday but now hungover to the point I'm on my third breakfast of the day...
from nineofswords :
I bet that girl died saying "Now I'll never get to do Dangerspouse..."
from cocoabean :
Really, I don't get the point of voting either, since the EC can vote any way they want.
from alethia :
My visa is up, and I've exhausted options for getting another or an extension. :( Back to Ye Olde Canadia I go.
from jimbostaxi :
Now that's more like it! :0)
from yellow-ninja :
Thanks, Danger. She was a great lady.
from jimbostaxi :
I give you Deliverance and you give me get well soon! Who the fuck are you cause the Dangerspouse I knew would not of typed that lame as shit on my notes page, now think up some totally offensive shit and get back to me pronto! :0)
from jimbostaxi :
Homo erotic hick humour ,,,, I wonder does wonder does Hallmark make a card for that? :0)
from whystinger :
I like the pennies in condoms idea. I once planted condoms as balloons and may have written about it before or even mentioned it to you before. In any case, if my entry is a duplicate, it is your fault, ha ha ha. toss a few pennies in the sand and grind them under with your foot. Actually, in the Newark watershed property there are numerous old homesites where only a fireplace stands or a brick or stone foundation. Friend found stuff around there so that may be productive hunting grounds. Another idea - find old cities where they are doing some digging. Heck, I can show you a few Civil War sites around where I used to live where you fill find old musket balls and bullets.
from jimbostaxi :
Back to boring now,, I hope :0)
from nineofswords :
Damn skippy. ;-)
from aryssa90 :
I know. Why is it that right when you let someone really start to biblically know you they go and get girlfriends?
from nineofswords :
Doh! You should have mentioned that other remedy before I popped my 800 mg of pain reliever. Now nothing on me hurts, but nothing on me feels orgasmically great, either. I guess I should have known that you make Bao. Go on, take a Bao. :-)
from nineofswords :
Yes, I am glad you let your incorrigible flag fly. I wouldn't change a thing.
from nineofswords :
in·cor·ri·gi·ble inˈkôrəjəb(ə)l/ adjective adjective: incorrigible 1. (of a person or their tendencies) not able to be corrected, improved, or reformed. i.e. Dangerspouse.
from whystinger :
Nice, need to read the foodie stuff, but no time, gotta make a flight. You know where the old homes and cabins are in those woods? Take the metal detector around there and hunt. I used to know those woods. Oh, take a handful of pennies and toss them around the sand for the lady's granddaughter and maybe some other interesting metal trash.
from nineofswords :
Entry hilarious... now let's talk about rolls. I love rolls so very much. Those rolls look like heaven and what a fine looking baking pan you have. You lucky, roll eating hound. Please note I didn't make a single remark about other stories that could be constructed about you, $1.37, a 60 year old woman, and cunnilingus. None whatsoever.
from kelsi :
I had my phone read your latest entry to me out loud because I am too lazy to read with my eyeballs sometimes, and it was hilarious, especially the part where she said BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.
from comebacktome :
Well, I hope so! So far I am not having much luck. BTW- not necessarily perky, just large for my frame, think in terms of 'They're real, and they're fantastic' ;) But that is all we shall say on the matter, because seriously dude, New Wifey (™) scares me a little lol.
from yellow-ninja :
Free shipping?! How can I resist? I'm glad you, like my other potential salesperson, live thousands of miles from me. Nothing says convenience like ordering unnecessary products through a middleman who lives in a different state.
from a-z-a :
Seems it's no longer a matter of "will" or "won't" for me; I feel like it's something that I have to do. Thank-you for the encouraging words :)
from jimbostaxi :
My heads so far up there already I can give myself a prostate exam :0)
from catsoul :
Thanks...by the way it is son, granddaughter, and son's friend who is a gal. I giggled. =^..^=
from nineofswords :
I'm going to check out Norfork, AR! I've vacationed in Eureka Springs a few times and Hot Springs, farther south. I've been all over the Fayetteville area. It really is very pretty up there and I like the fall foliage. I have a good friend that lives in Fayetteville. I read that Ted Danson and Mary Steenburgen live in Arkansas because it's beautiful and they love it. Thanks for the encouragement.
from hitch-hike :
Yeah, hell hath no fury like a woman spewing lots of naughty words on an anonymous web page about some anonymous guy, bahahaha!! It's kinda sad because I just about indulge every other darker side of myself except for my ability to cuss!
from nineofswords :
Dude. I apologize to the maids about his bathroom and bedroom every time they come around. Solitude has been regained! The little destructive bird flew the coop!
from kelsi :
Thanks. However, I'd argue that Dan Brown might, in some cases, be worse than fights.
from bantenhut :
Oh, wow--okay, so I just realized something. The slow nerd deer? He's an introvert, and he survived the accident BECAUSE he's an introvert. Because there is plenty of room for innies and outies in this world. Allow me to explain: a scientist dude did an experiment on Pumpkinseed Fish. Odd name, right? Okay, so he throws a trap into their aquarium, and it sinks to the bottom. The extroverted fish swim straight to it, get caught, and immediately die. But the standoffish fish? They survive. Then he does another experiment. He takes the introverted and extroverted fishies to his lab, and puts them in brand new tanks. The extros start acclimating to the new environment right away, and eating and cavorting and so forth. The intros took several days longer to eat, and adjusted notably slower. So in that test, the extroverts were more likely to survive. Sorry, that was a social science lesson you didn't ask for. Good evening, danger! :D
from bantenhut :
Heya, Danger! Geez, I'm sorry your elbows are such jerks! And my gosh, your vehicle is amazing to hold up to TWO DEER. And you listen to Japanese polka on an 8-track? You are full of surprises! I think that's all the commentary I have at the moment, I'll be sending good vibes that the last deer doesn't hunt you down.
from alethia :
Hahaha. If only I could talk about what I'm working on now, but the Mouse's lawyers are armed and vengeful. I dare not tempt their wrath. ;)
from jimbostaxi :
Naked was the clincher when the DMV employee walked up to the bus and saw me standing there in nothing but a pair of cheap sneakers she wrote me up a passing grade on the test and said " Any one who's got a tiny package like that needs all the help they can get" so Jimbos official I still can't fucking believe it,,, thanks for the note :0)
from alethia :
Oh, just a little film called Warcraft. Also, I'm glad you updated. I thought you'd abandoned us. I was sharpening my pitchfork and getting read to come for your appliance power cords. Bummer about the elbow. I hope it heals up nice-like.
from buffylass :
That's not me on the internet. That's my twin. I don't ever write about her but she definitely exists. All the elbow drama sucks to hell and back. Were you still able to hold and drink a beer?
from narcissa :
oh, and good luck with the surgery. Your updates are missed, but I guess functional arms are more important.
from narcissa :
i must be all grown up. I have a sort of "what did I do for the last 5 years? no really." feeling (and diaryland no help. Seriously. what happened?) but recriminations are minimal. Probably because I can't remember anything to recriminate. Obviously need to write more.
from comebacktome :
I KNOW, RIGHT?! I was like, what the actual fuck is going on right now?! I had such high hopes with the sex talk and the leg rubbing and the 'knows his way around a vulva' vibes. Sigh. Oh well, perhaps for the best, the kids thing really is way too much drama. But shit man, what does a girl have to do??? Thanks for the offer (I think?) but tbh New Wifey (™) is far too much of a badass. I have seen the crap she can do to an egg, I would worry something similar might befall my eyeballs should I encroach on her territory. Besides, sisterhood and all that ;) But I did really appreciate the note, you gave me a laugh when I was feeling rejected, and soothed my wounded pride (Seriously, who turns down THIS *gestures to boobs*), so cheers!
from aryssa90 :
And I doubt the fleshlight appreciates your oral skills as much as a real one might. I know I appreciate a cunning linguist.
from comebacktome :
Huzzah! Welcome back! I have been stalking you on WP also, but actually saw it here first. I'm slightly disappointed that it's not a masturbation injury, that would be the best story! In other news, trying to break my dry spell upon your encouragement and failing- mostly because the dude turns out to want to have feelings and shit. Weirdo. He clearly has no respect for mink.
from yellow-ninja :
1) Listen, we don't need to talk about me being a crip - I'm going to start wearing a ton of purple so the rumor'll be that I'm a blip. This fresh scar on my belly? I only wanted everyone to think it was from melanoma. 2) I'm 5'4", the national average, so probably still down? Unless you're a giant? 3) Sorry about your wasted year. Since it'll be wasted anyway, you should get into some even crazier shit than usual. Like, step up from murdering deer and get into some real one-handed mayhem. (But really, you didn't miss out on that venison - bloodshot meat or meat tainted by busted up internal organs is no good) Glad you survived the deer assassination attempt (so far), and good luck with your future as RoboCop!
from kelsi :
No, of course not, but given two equally reasonable candidates, gender would be the tipping point. But let's say the democrats put forth some boring old fuddy-duddy and the republicans put forth Condoleeza Rice, well... I can't say I wouldn't then vote republican. However, if Condoleeza chose Sarah Palin as her running mate, well... uh. So there.
from jarofporter :
ok, fine... just because you asked nicely. :-P
from eloira :
Ahhh, good to know you're still in one piece! Well, most of you at least... Hoping the next surgery goes smoothly (no pun intended, honest). As for the deer, it's nice to know it's not just us! Hopefully getting the radiator fixed Tuesday, and possibly may shed some of the deer hair making the car look like it's grown a moustache... Also thought about meat spoils, but it was still far too alive and kicking. Pleased the damage to yours seems to be superficial!
from aryssa90 :
Im still not convinced these arent masturbation related injuries. Maybe with cyborg arms youll be able to have a tighter grip or something. Go go gadget fleshlight!
from jimbostaxi :
Killing deer and elbow surgery all thats a smoke screen your really the Donald's hair dresser/ campaign manager!!! Well I can't say that I'm happy that you work for the Donald but I am happy your back and are ok :0) now throw some deer snuff porn on the tube and get busy mister :0)
from candora :
Wait, what? HissandTell is just sleeping, right? A recent email reference to meeting at Diaryland in 2005 brought me back to explore (Candoor is sort of summarizing the journey, which may take a while, even though I am logged in with my other account). I was so glad to find you still pouring brilliant words out here. Thank you for that. I hope all is well. :)
from nepenthean :
HissandTell is dead? That makes sense but damnit! I loved her too. How many years has it been? And do you know if Marn has kicked the bucket also, or just moved on. I've had this DL for 13 years! I refuse to get rid of it. Just so handy and old skool.
from bantenhut :
Are you okay, rollicking tower of man flesh? Haven't seen you in awhile! Hope you're well. :)
from movingsands :
You're right, of course, as always. I'll keep writing and keep this page forever and ever and then some. And don't you dare completely leave us for WordPress! That would for sure be the death of dland...
from mousecatdog1 :
I don't know what you were talking about showers on that note you left me. Btw I like your last entry.
from mousecatdog1 :
I don't know what you were talking about showers on that note you left me. Btw I like your last entry.
from peggypenny :
Are you available for studio flute gigs?
from portlypete :
Well, I'm in favo(u)r of torture, so long as the recepient's name begins with Donald and ends with something that rhymes with another name for a horse's arse. Just picture that **** **** **** with his finger poised over the "FIRE!" button.
from vxxen :
Your latest entry was so freakin cute! You're wifey is ABSOLUTELY awesome. Don't Fuck it up
from vxxen :
Why did hissandtell die? :'(
from nineofswords :
I've read that book before, but I've forgotten almost everything about the story. All I remember is there was a dog, a snake, a mongoose, and a boy. Totally thought it was the dog with the funny name. heh
from nineofswords :
If laughter is the best medicine, I have you to thank for a good dose in that last note. Thanks
from vxxen :
Lmfao (Sighs) nooooo, he's not gay OR republican. He's got 2 kids and a crazy gf. Besides, I get a certain level of respect than the other women that work at my job. And I cherish that the moSt. :)
from yellow-ninja :
Ain't that the truth. At least with this unpleasantly learned knowledge, I can prevent future unpleasantness.
from bantenhut :
Ha! I binged a few days ago, didn't leave a note, and then read another entry with an all-inclusive note. Yay! Glad you enjoyed it! :)
from barefootruby :
*dessert not desert
from barefootruby :
pears I can tolerate I I really have to, but would prefer not to. When I was a kid my mum took me to one of her old friends for lunch. When dessert came the friend announced "nothing much for desert I'm afraid; only pears". Being polite and shy I was too afraid to say I didn't like them - and mum said nothing either. So I ate as few slices and with as much shortbread as I could get away with. Pineapple, however, I can't eat at all. Scroll forward a few years and my first visit to my dad's new gf. She'd made a fruit cocktail, which was fine until I found a piece of pineapple. "oh well, I can leave that on the side without causing offence" I thought. But on closer inspection I discovered that the cocktail was 50% pineapple. I had to 'fess up and ask my dad to eat it.
from kelsi :
Thanks for the birthday wishes! Interesting fact, Sean Astin has more dads than you can shake a stick at.
from integrating :
:D
from comebacktome :
Ha! My WP is not so much on the photos, more on the stories and travel tips. And I never said it was good, but you can read it anyway- https://thetravelsaga.wordpress.com ;) I really need to get my shit together and post some more stuff, I have like 30 countries to add to the list...
from papotheclown :
I know. I know. In retrospect, should have totally made the ten block walk. I have no real excuse.
from bantenhut :
You're a flautist! Cool. Nothing to be ashamed of, but I understand you're joshing! Your wife is so awesome! Delicious looking buns, too. Glad you've not left Diaryland, and it's just a sideshow over at that OTHER blogging site. And, I think you're absolutely right -- people miss writing. I love seeing new/old members post "hello again" entries. Heartening indeed. Oh, and funny story: I never once noticed your piano key and music note background until your new blog came around. So your new layout is doing something right! Oh, and I have a real lack of observation skills, apparently. Cheerio!
from jimbostaxi :
How's this one ,, who's the father you ask ? Jeez if that towel gets any fucking smaller that she walks around in or she bends over to pick up a quarter I might be! Of course I'd have to heave my saggy geezer balls over my shoulder and have the paramedics on standby but hey if there's grass on the fucking infield play ball!!!! Ah it was a touching scene in the fucking shithole I call the compound all 50-60 men who live here had somber faces as T.G screamed QUIET! I HAVE AND ANNOUNCENT,,, a hush fell over the crowd ., then she said it,,, I'm pregnant ,, we all cried and hugged each other thinking each of us was the dad. Then the crying became laughter as she said Mikes the father ! the cheers, the jubilation it was like the fucking 4th of July and New Years combined. Then we all went out to get fucked up everyone except Mike who just kept muttering why me?? Yep he knows
from vxxen :
LMFAO! RIFHT?! I actually WAS thinking about going that way, too! LOL How'd you know?!
from nineofswords :
I know, right? My dreams are better than movies.
from jimbostaxi :
Mike is the dad T.G (towel gal) his scantily clad girlfriend is the mom. She's moving in on the 1st and in 9 months there baby will join the compound.
from eloira :
Yes. Yes they do... I can't say I'd turn it down to be fair (just don't tell the fur babies)...
from vxxen :
Lmfaooo! Silly
from integrating :
Hahaha! Yeah, I'm sure he took a shower. I had to clean the friggin tub. Me and Kris take showers on a regular basis and it stays pretty much clean. I swear I don't know how he made it so dirty. Gross. Why is it MY chore to clean the bathroom? :/
from jarofporter :
thanks. venting is one thing (and it did make me feel better) but letting it stay actually felt like it was drawing energy from me. i need to focus on positive vibes so i don't fall into a 'funk' again, ya know? and dwelling on that would definitely not be helpful. :-(
from vxxen :
I would be doing food I guess and I.signed up for Dyson, the vacuum. They're the highest pay rat at 16/hour
from misfitstray :
well, I definitely will use my smartphone just in case something happens and I would need rescue. There better - very damn - has to be proper reception when something happens to me. Then 2nd I love to read. I plan on doing 1-2 rest-days on my hike and the kindle weighs a lot less than a book... As I'm a quick reader I will at least need 2 or 3 books. 3rd, I want to listen to music before I go to sleep and as I don't play an instrument or sing (you never want to hear me sing!!) there's no other option than an MP3-Player...
from jarofporter :
it's advice that will be considered, although i shouldn't be needing it right away. i sung this last time at a good 3-4 inch distance - with the monitor being set properly, i could adjust my volume quite easily simply by turning towards/away from the mic ever so slightly. also at that distance, no popping P's or such, either! if i start to notice issues, i'll definitely keep it in mind though, thanks!
from missgoldfish :
Hey, thanks :)
from jarofporter :
yeah? usually when girls are making love, i'm just watching them intently (and maybe recording it!?) :-P
from vxxen :
You're right about the bumper sticker. So, I bought a ring LOL same thing, right? Lol
from jarofporter :
what is this 'getting laid' of which you speak?
from vxxen :
THANK you, danger :) I'm.feeling much better and your words touched.My heart. I should be back to Batgirl status soon lol
from barefootruby :
I'll settle for a few fake records. Hey, if it had been Jimmy Savile who knows what horrors might have been perpetrated on me and my little sister. (there's acres of internet coverage on Jimmy Savile, if the depths of his depravity haven't reached the US)
from alethia :
Recently I found a Moeck recorder in a thrift store, with a case and all the trappings. It looked like someone got it from their grandmother, thanked her politely, and gave it to the store. I paid $20 for it. $20 CANADIAN. So virtually nothing. It wasn't one of the REALLY expensive ones, but it was a 2200 Flauto Rondo Descant. I gave it to my recorder-playing friend for her birthday and she almost shat herself. It was a good party. :D
from lust- :
Hah. Yes, it's good to multitask.
from eloira :
I also play! Swap out viola for piano, and I play ALL of the ones you mentioned... I also drink Makers Mark... I have kept it quiet so far, but I may have to tell him if we cohabit - lets face it, I can't exactly sneak a piano into the house...
from nineofswords :
1) Getting your flute serviced... is that what the kids are calling it these days? 2) All that flute playing experience will come in handy if you ever have to go to prison. 3) I laughed really hard at "sounds like someone is torturing a cat". Makers Mark. Cheers!
from nineofswords :
Out of curiosity, did you think I had extra thumbs, or not enough?
from whystinger :
Well shit, I knew you played the skin flute, but didn't know you blew for a living. The flute AND piccolo! Wow. She plays the Viola, which is cool. Since we are all looking down cast and telling secrets, I was a bandie too. coronet/trumpet. There's a story there too...
from astitchaway :
Hey, thanks for the welcome back! I forgot how great this place was. It's like a loving family! I am going to try and stick around, since everyone is so happy to see me! That's such a nice feeling.
from alethia :
I swear to the sweet baby jeebus, if you ditch us last honourable few here at DL for stupid Wordpress, I'mma come your damned house and take every last power cord and attachments for all your kitchen appliances. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT CUISINART FOOD PROCESSOR WITH NO BLADES, HUH?!
from vxxen :
Your notes ALWAYS.make me.feel better. You and @whystinger are my 'Diaryland rocks.' Lol I know you're married.But idk if your a father, if you are, I can.tell you're an AWESOME father. If you're.not, (and I'm.sorry of this statement.brought up.any bad.feelings) you would be a TERRIFIC father :)
from invisibledon :
Well, it may have been a subliminal oversight, you had just given me a compliment.
from invisibledon :
Wonderful story about the cherrio's and I like you, was over joyed the day Uncle Bob left a note on my page
from invisibledon :
I've never given up on diaryland but i have gotten lazy in my writing over the years which I'm trying to correct, for better or worse
from evanelle :
Just noticed your note from awhile ago. To answer your question, her boyfriend overdosed and died while she was passed out beside him.
from raven72d :
I really do hope more people return to DL to blog. I enjoy the interactions and the stories, and I enjoy having people with whom to exchange notes and thoughts.
from comebacktome :
:O You better bloody well still post on both sites- where else would I get my random entertainment regarding goats, mormon door knockers, and kitchen aid shenanigans? Don't you dare abandon us for the Wordpress snobs you hear? NB: I do have a wordpress, but it is a travel blog filled with ridiculous but true stories. D-land is for proper thinking and shit.
from buffylass :
Dude, I'm English - it's in my DNA to be prudish! Also, I double post both here and over at Blogger, SOLELY so that I can host images on Blogger and <img src> them from here. So I feel you on the WordPress shenanigans.
from raschel :
You are right. I never left to another blog or forum and I'm not on fb either. I think it's sad that some features here are not working anymore.
from cocoabean :
You are right, it does take considerable effort to post a blog entry, but for me, it's finding the time to sit and type.. and type. I haven't defected to FB and I still read here, just haven't found the time to post. Soon!
from yellow-ninja :
Welcome to the new age, Mr. Spouse! Mind if I follow with my own (incredibly boring, no-need-to-follow-but-you-can-if-you-want, running-based) Wordpress?
from jimbostaxi :
Bella's home thanks for the note :0)
from buffylass :
You're very kind - thankyou very much! I shall similarly add you... fulling anticipating your diary to be a soft porn escapade, and will be disappointed if it's not!
from yellow-ninja :
You know, there are entire buildings full of people with that superpower. It's limited to about 50 minute bursts, though, and very condition dependent. As Heinlein said, "women and cats will do as they please".
from narcissa :
ICP is my backup, obvs.
from alethia :
Wise man. I wish more men would. My dad used to to keep some of mine in his suitcase, and it really saved me once. It's fine to say 'plan ahead', but best laid plans of wombats and women, as they say.
from theshivers :
I suddenly feel like my life has more meaning! :)
from buffylass :
Thank you! Hahaha no, in that weird way, since I've been back I haven't watched a single CSI since. Just started Luther on Netflix though, which is similarish!
from raschel :
Glad you are more than superficially fat, dumb and happy. :) Yeah updates will remain in german language. I need an outlet in my language. It's easier when coming from my heart.
from raschel :
Superficially seen, all is good. How are you?
from raschel :
Thank you!
from bantenhut :
AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Hahahahaha. UT will GET you.
from integrating :
Thank you for the note. <3
from peggypenny :
arg. "Bald" men are still being born."
from nineofswords :
Trollop!! Ah... you gave me a giggle and I needed one. So thanks. :-)
from cocoabean :
This just came through on my feedly.. http://www.politicalgarbagechute.com/coroner-report-confirms-scalia-died-without-shred-humanity/
from nineofswords :
Call me psychic, but I am getting the impression that you were not all that fond of Scalia.
from jimbostaxi :
Heats on!!!! Pilot light kept going out but it's staying on now. Thanks for the shelter and tile advice :0)
from jarofporter :
ya know, i wish you'd just go ahead & say what you're really thinking about scalia... all this 'beating around the bush' is pretty lame.
from peggypenny :
Whenever friends say they are sorry they are atheist, I tell them this: "Bold men are still being born. That means natural selection has allowed them to breed. There is a God!"
from yellow-ninja :
Such a beautiful tribute to the life and work of Justice Scalia. It brings a tear to my eye, much like the tears of joy I shed when I first learned of that horrible man's death. Truly touching.
from bantenhut :
Good gracious! The Puppy Bowl is absolutely adorable! Thanks for the recommendation!
from bantenhut :
Wow. I just read that he said, "Mere factual innocence is no reason not to carry out a death sentence properly reached." WHAT?
from jimbostaxi :
Oops it should have said he will be missed by all
from jimbostaxi :
So me sending flowers and a note signed with your name to the Scalia family was a bad thing? It said my deepest condolences he was a great man that will by all
from bethshort :
No, I didn't get into Antioch :-( . I couldn't get my records and they wouldn't accept any other proof. However, when I went for campus visit day, they had still not earned back their certification as an actual college, from when they collapsed financially, and had to be taken over by a larger entity. So, as it turns out, not getting in was something of a boon, since a BA from there would have only meant something to me, and not the world at large, without the credit. I did however get accepted to another, fully accredited university, and am finishing my BA online :-) Thanks so much for coming by!
from nineofswords :
That's better. :-)
from nineofswords :
Somehow I knew it would be you who would claim that someone else thought of my pie hack invention before I did. I didn't think there would be exponents involved, but I knew you would try to burst my bubble, you bubble burster! I have actually seen those pie edge rings. But I never think about that in advance so I made my own. My little invention was a big improvement over my usual plan which was making 3 strips of tin foil cling to the edges without burning my fingerprints off.
from bantenhut :
Also, dangit I didn't know I needed to send Hannah that message! My bad, next time, haha. Actual chicks (baby chickens) as cheerleaders? Interesting thought. I like it. I'd watch that. Don't know what the Puppy Bowl is. I might go watch the "Super" one on Sunday at a friend's, we shall see. Yes to Go Team Corgi, and yes to "hamsters in a blimp filming puppies fighting over stuffed toys." Where do you come up with these things?! :D
from bantenhut :
hey lookee there! We're the only two users online right now! Yay, 6:25am my time! Hah!
from bantenhut :
YES! Hannah Hart for the win, everyday all the time! :) I actually got to meet her a few years ago when she went on tour. I've never heard of Aquafina - that's the youtuber, not the water brand, right? Yes to puppies and bathing! Yes to your best self being ever-changing! :)
from integrating :
Thanks for the note. My motivation to get the hell out of here is what will keep me trying to save up as fast as I can.
from vxxen :
2/3/16. I LOVE your face. That actually made me feel better. Lol
from sevenmagpies :
Mashed potato yogurt? I don't know whether to hug you or hit you. Three more days!! You laugh, but every conversation with my Grams is a little batty, and trust me when I say it's got nothing to do with old age :-). My Gramps was a 1950s gangster living in Mayfair who burnt evidence in fires and switched license plates on his collection of Jags every week, and still she maintains she didn't know he was a criminal until the Garda came to extradite them back to England. Wow, that is one fabulous wedding pic, I have to say. I also dig your wife's hair. But I totally understand the urge to cut it when it's hot. I cave and do the same thing a lot with my curly hair (It's like having an effing fleece on your neck, I swear) and then it seems to take FOREVER to grow back. Sucks rocks.
from whystinger :
Happy belated birthday. In my mind, I keep going back to your Jan 23rd entry. I have to say, your marriage ain't based on a lie, it is based on New Wifey's love. What a loving thing that she told you she liked getting spackled and swallowing cum. My ex couldn't be bothered to do things like that even if my life depended on it. I know you knew all that, but I still gotta say, you are a luck fucker! and to top it all off, she says "well, you still have time to spackle more... Awesome!
from hitch-hike :
Felipe's people used P.A.N., which is pre-cooked white corn meal and they didn't sweeten theirs or add kernels of corn. They ate them with ham and a mild, white Latin cheese. I just can't quite make them the same way...
from comebacktome :
Happy belated birthday! In response to your note- I know, I know, I am working on it. The problem seems to be that generally guys are kinda dicks and/or stupid and then I get annoyed and turned off. We never get to sexy times because they ruin it before I even get to the making out part. Sigh.
from nineofswords :
ERMAGERD. When you fucked her, did I like it? hahaha
from raven72d :
Merci! I'm making port and wine notes from your recommendations.
from integrating :
Happy Birthday crazy man!
from nineofswords :
I know, right?! I bet you didn't even know Tommy Lee is a girl.
from melodymetuka :
Happy birthday!
from bantenhut :
Oh, wow! Thank you for the in all seriousness advice! I didn't see that note until just now, as it was thoughtfully separated from the one before it! You give solid advice on these things. As for the dispassionate, well, he is dispassionate about nearly everything and everyone. Except when people do stupid things on the road, so clearly he doesn't have a death wish, haha. Also, we're actually engaged, and I don't really think he would leave me, I am just very jealous because...well, I just am. And if there was to ever be a breakup, it would likely be me breaking it off with him. But I'm super curious, what made you think I thought he might leave? (I am asking you that directly, and so it's okay if the answer isn't so pretty.) Anyway, thanks for the advice. When you said "genetic propensity," did you mean to avoid doing what my mother did, or to watch out, because my kid could end up an emotional robot, like my fiance? Either is possible, I just like analyzing your words! Anywho, it'll be awhile yet before I have a career, so it'll be awhile till a kiddo. Good talk. :)
from bantenhut :
THAT IS SO MANY CHILDREN. Happy Birthday! Congratulations on having no kids and lots of sex!
from sevenmagpies :
Happy Birthday! Sucks for you, you missed out on being a Capricorn by eight crucial days. Ha-ha. Also - freaky you should mention the tightness of vaginas - I totes read your post after writing mine so I'm not plagiarising like Mozart! I don't know that show! And I was all thinking it MUST be American, and then I google it and find out it was on channel 4 - shame on me. I can understand the good doctors appeal though - very broody. I didn't see your wedding pic :-( - sometimes I forget to read posts on DL...like a lot of the time. I try to catch up...I shall try harder! Thank you for being my cheerleader by the way! You can have some honorary pom poms.
from alethia :
Happy birthday! Do you make your own cake? I always do. Those monsters I call friends can't bake worth a damn.
from eloira :
Happy birthday! :D Hope the end of your day was far superior to the having to work part!
from nineofswords :
Happy Birthday! You really showed Mozart! Total win.
from nilliem :
Happy birthday, dear! Hope it is marvelous, and wonder-filled.
from catsoul :
Happy Birthday to YOU.....Whoppee......did I spell that correctl....who the fuck cares....have a great fucking day man!!!!!!!!!!!
from jarofporter :
happy bday, and yeah, 'suck it'! mozart! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2CnkMZaNJI&feature=youtu.be&t=14s
from jimbostaxi :
Happy bday :0)
from jimbostaxi :
Happy bday :0)
from misfitstray :
should be fixed now - sorry for the inconvenience
from whystinger :
Interesting about the prostate situation. I feel for you. I had heard that they stopped doing that surgery years ago, but then I recently heard they did not stop, but they had changed something with it and perhaps it was improved. My Dad had that about 40 years ago. I think the recovery is fairly long. You may want to see if there is a support group and go talk to a few of the guys who had that to make sure you understand what is involved. I do understand, my prostate is enlarged too. Probably from us living too close to Hamburg mountain and all the radon coming from it in that NY/NJ border area.
from muffinhead :
Haha! Thanks, yeah not too keen on giving up my craft room that's for sure (though it's rarely used). As for adding you, until I stumbled across my notes I hadn't realized you had even posted (where's the heads up d-land?!). You "know" me, looking forward to catching up on your reads... Cheerio.
from misfitstray :
I feel sorry for you. That was quite the a torture at the doctors office. You poor one! Do the surgery now, then it's behind you and you can look forward to sperm-free adventures with NewWifey(TM). I don't like to swallow either, I guess most women don't. Ezekiel 23:20 says correctly in a most direct translation from hebrew: "And she kept lusting in the style of concubines belonging to those whose fleshly member is as the fleshly member of male asses and whose genital organ is as the genital organ of male horses" Well, that's what my bible says.
from cloudy-night :
I am seriously thinking about putting the television away. I am too attached to it to just set it out on the curb. But I think I will just put it away and just catch up on some things. Sorry to hear you have to go through such a surgery. Do you want any children? Do your wife want any?
from stepfordtart :
Oh My! I was trying (probably too hard) to imagine what a retrograde thingummybob would feel like but its been so long since I had sex that it was an imagine too far. Be well, my friend. s xx
from sevenmagpies :
Indeed, I WAS waiting for surgery right then. Keeping busy seemed the thing to do (not that I'd had surgery before and knew the protocol) and it worked. I had a sleeve gastrectomy done privately (that's where they take away 75-80% of the stomach for the uninitiated in bariatric surgery) - so elective but major. Thanks for the well wishes though! Just so you know, that chicken fajita burger, sweet potato fries and coffee milkshake will be a regular feature of my dreams for the next six weeks - solid food is a no go. Especially solid, unhealthy food. Anyway - unused Christmas wrapping paper? I know not what that is. I'm one of those creative cutters who gets as much out of the roll as possible. Sorry to hear about the news of your impending op - your episode at the docs actually made me feel good about pap smears. So, bravo, you have done the impossible :-D I can understand wanting to wait and spread the spackle about a bit before it is no more too. Your wife sounds uber cool.
from glorycloud :
the moon was rising over the tree tops in those photos-peace
from catsoul :
Wow...talk about an experience. Thanks for sharing.
from jimbostaxi :
I'm ,,,at a loss for words,,, thank you? :9)
from jimbostaxi :
My house is fairly close to smithtown area I just checked online and it says we got about 23 inches. Those fuckers stayed open all day they only closed Saturday night. Lots of people still looking for cabs they don't give a shit it's snowing it's time to wash this 59 bags of laundry they have saved up
from alethia :
Hahahaha. I had that urethra one done when I was five. I don't remember much about it except it was very painful and very uncomfortable. I'm glad you're not dying (yet) though. I hear dying is even more uncomfortable.
from comebacktome :
Shit dude, sorry to hear. Strangely, I would actually be upset if I could never have cum on me ever again, BUT that person being alive would definitely trump spackling, as much as I enjoy it. And hey, at least you can still get hard and have an orgasm- lots of prostate surgeries fuck that up, so I am relived for you! And hey, no cancer is always a win!
from bantenhut :
Wow! What a doctor adventure! I forgot what a Durian fruit was, and looked it up -- they're terrifically pointy. Ouch. You're being a trooper, and your wife is such a character! Good luck! And - good thing you caught the issue before it escalated. Lastly, don't worry about replying to notes in a timely manner, I don't either! Perhaps I should. Have you had your ration of neutral grain spirits today? Sounds like it's time. Also, I heard about Snowpocalypse and thought of you. Glad you have internet, that's something. #6 - Sparks fly up, that's the nickname of one of my favorite youtubers, had no idea it was a Bible verse. And good call, avoiding the addiction and data collection agency that is FB. Cheerio! :)
from nineofswords :
1.) I've never been so happy to be a girl. 2.) I cannot believe you didn't call for mouth to mouth resuscitation for Little Elvis. 3.)"If you have "Michigan Woodcock" for more than 4 hours, see a doctor immediately."
from jimbostaxi :
:0( it was your station managers idea ... He said your ratings were slipping,,,, I'm just and innocent pawn
from jimbostaxi :
I would gladly drive up to Dangermansion and take you to JFK but first there's a waiver you must sign, Its only 16 pages long after you've done that you must submit to a full body search to make sure you have no audio or video equipment on you. If you make it through all that the next step is easy we go to Madam Wongs massage parlor get you nice and relaxed before your flight and then it's a hop skip and jump to the airport ! so when your ready have your people contact my people :0)
from nineofswords :
LOL! Yes. You XYs are a different kind of creature.
from jimbostaxi :
I'm thinking about breaking my case so the salesgirl can service me again LMAO hmmmm get your mind out the gutter :0)
from aryssa90 :
It was not Ken and Lee, it was neither of them actually. It was a guy I had been chatting with and his friend. I think ken and Lee would be fun but it would be weird because they're emotionally attached to me although maybe I'm wrong because ughh it's on my newest entry. I'll take a picture of the mixer and I'll work on the video lol. I definitely plan on doing it again, asap. im glad things are going well in your end, especially still having hair lol. How is your speaker doing?
from misfitstray :
All is well and toasty at nights in my sleeping bags. If not I would take one of the several offers of colleagues and friends to sleep over at their homes. 1479 WOW! Only 200 levels to go for me. YAY!
from nineofswords :
I do have a crazy switch, but mine doesn't get flipped very often. I have a long fuse, quite uncharacteristic of my gender and my redhead status. So I know better than to throw out the entire gender due to just a few million bad apples. But when my crazy switch does get flipped, bar the door, Katie.
from jarofporter :
and wow, it took me this long to realize i didn't thank you for the b-day wishes... sorry dood, and thanks!
from aryssa90 :
Ken and Lee should really consider your proposition . I'm all about it. I should find out this week if I got the position, I'm thinking I didn't because they can't really afford to lose me in the position I'm in as we are already short staffed. Ugh. My grandma moved back in with my grandpa but nothing is resolved. They're both unhappy. They've been together for like 46 years so it's weird. I hope they work it out but I don't want them to stay together because they feel they have no other options. How are you? I thought about you the other day because lee works at a pizza place and I watched him mix dough in what looks like a giant kitchen aid mixer. Think of the possibilities!
from kelsi :
You are so gracious. Congratulations on your award! I have so many of those statuettes that I'm running out of space. I really need to move to a place with a trophy room.
from misfitstray :
At which level is your wife now? I bet she's played it until the end by now.
from a-z-a :
Thanks for the kind words :) Hope the year treats you well.
from eloira :
Thanks, truly! I mean, yeah - big news... I COOKED!!
from sevenmagpies :
Note notifications must have been pure wishful thinking! Excellent. I never make New Years resolutions for that reason alone :-D I always break the rules I'm supposed to stick to by sheer will power alone. Thank you for the birthday wishes - I didn't, however, eat three times as much as I should. You could think of it as a bit like a last meal though - chicken fajita burger and sweet potato fries...and that coffee milkshake...to die for. My pre-op diet started not long after and it's been a bore in comparison. I'm current sat in my hospital room waiting to be taken to surgery - I'll keep dreaming of that burger for the next six weeks when I can't eat solid food *sighs*. By the way - a metal detector?! What an epic gift. I think I'd live on the beach, searching through coke cans for elusive treasure!
from integrating :
"My wife calls mine "cake balls" too. Weird." LMAO!!
from jarofporter :
nope, no cake, no booze, and seriously, not in a funk! i'm in that space exactly between 'everything sucks' and 'everything's fuckin' awesome' - right there in the middle where nothing is anything. not such a bad place, really.
from yellow-ninja :
Oh no, I absolutely think it was some dumb teenage boy impulse that led them out onto the thin ice. I think what everyone is hoping for is some reason other than lack of a fully developed prefrontal cortex for why a 16-year-old kid is dead and another is currently hanging out at death's door. Make it easier to deal with or something. It doesn't actually, of course, but wondering what led them out there is a good distraction.
from raven72d :
If I get the space ever, I will get a small corgi friend.
from jimbostaxi :
What is happy with out sad? What is dark with out light ? What is New York with out the chance of snow related death and destruction? And as I send you this message snow falls from the sky onto the rooftops :0)
from jarofporter :
oh, and yes - been watching grizzly adams for the last few days, now up to episode 14! heh...
from jarofporter :
hey, maybe i'll just start posting links to entries i've already made, as my new entries, since they all seem to say basically the same thing. i'm sure i've got an entry for just about any topic there is! :-P
from jarofporter :
nothing wrong, just have no idea what to say anymore that isn't something i've already been saying for years. why bother repeat myself? *shrugs*
from bantenhut :
By the way, congrats on your 1995 ring. And also, did you know there's a FB group for DL? I had to bug the leader of it to let me in, but it's a group of about 60, pretty neat. I have my Groups list hidden on FB, which is a thing you can do if you're worried about privacy. Lata!
from bantenhut :
So your dad plays Animal Crossing? That's interesting, and sounds like a story of its own! I didn't realize you had so many drinking responsibilities working at a radio station, ha! You had a terrible cable provider? I formerly worked for fairpoint (indirectly), so if you had them, you might have spoken to me at one time or another. Yeesh, it's bad news bears for people in the northeast who use them. Anyway, glad you've found a better way, whoever your provider was. Woot is pretty great! I bought a record player there once. It eventually broke, like the player I had before it, but it was a nice addition for awhile. Fortunately, it wasn't the size of a loveseat! Thanks for your comments, as usual! It's fun reading them!
from raven72d :
I try to be useful!
from nineofswords :
Thank you. My bro-in-law was only 47. Too young for it to be over.
from stepfordtart :
I couldnt get your link to work so I have yet to gaze upon your awesome ring. I can only wonder at the majesty of your ring, once you had wiped all the debris and ancient loamy crust off it, obvs. s x PS I use photobucket for my photos, Ive never had gold membership. Its easy and its free.
from yellow-ninja :
Yeah, teenagers I can handle. They have an excuse for acting the way they do. Other adults? No such excuse. Pass.
from jimbostaxi :
Dude really? You found my ring! That's awesome when can I be expecting it?
from misfitstray :
I always wanted to have a metal detector. But I don't think there's much left with all those treasure hunters around. And it's difficult to find spots to use as many areas are private land.
from itescapesme :
What makes me say what?
from catsoul :
Just wanted to say thanks for the note. I don't need sympathy, I needed to get it out so that I can move on. He has been like this for years. I don't know what he is going to do with himself when he retires. He doesn't have hobbies per say. Thanks again for your empathy. Sometimes I think I am just going......what I don't know. Take Care. =^..^=
from nineofswords :
Yep. I got the work-intensive end of the deal. That's for sure.
from kelsi :
Oh yes, of course there will be herbs - we have a herb garden with oregano, sage, mint, some other things. I have chives and will grow as much basil as possible - last year had about three basil plants per tomato, and we had more than 20 tomatoes. The tomatoes did not do well at all and... really, we don't have room for 20 tomato plants. 10 will be fine! Although we could put some planters out front...
from whystinger :
Ah, that is right! If memory serves me right, I lived 8 miles from the NY/NJ boarder right off 94 in Great Gorge. I need to come back for a visit to see the area one of these days. thanks!
from raven72d :
Thank you for that. And it is great port.
from catsoul :
she is my granddaughter
from raven72d :
Warre's, by the way--- very good port.
from raven72d :
Yay for the ice weasels! And a good Year Sixteen to you, too.
from misfitstray :
Congrats on your lucky find! You rock!
from yellow-ninja :
It's your diary, and you can self-aggrandize if you want to. That ring is a great find! I wonder how long it's been there to be under 4 inches of stuff.
from nineofswords :
Oh, sorry to leave you hanging like that. I cooked a pot of spaghetti. My skeddy sauce is the bomb diggity.
from nineofswords :
Wow! You lucky duck!
from whystinger :
Always wanted a metal detector. Sounds like you (potentially) live close to where I did, very close to the Appalachian trail on the boarder of NY/NJ. We probably mentioned it before. Any bones around? Hope it wasn't from an abduction and...
from catsoul :
Jmping up and down now.Your wife isn't going to see you a whole lot now. My granddaughter and I use ours all the time. Maybe that is why she loves to dig in the sand and dirt so much. After awhile your hands will become stained and hardened. You will know when you are a die hard digger of treasure when you break your first shovel. Oh and when you go to the "man's store" you are thrilled to check out picks and shovels, then buy another to add to your digging collection of treasure seeking tools. I truly wasn't bored at all with your entry. Oh and Happy New Year. Go search and dig. =^..^=
from sevenmagpies :
Whatever happened to note notifications?! Gah. Happy New Year to you too! Did you make any resolutions? Christmas was pretty good thanks. I commandeered the TV to watch Happy Feet, Brave, Doctor Who & Romeo and Juliet (I bet my step-dad-to-be just loves it when I'm around). My brother has some awesome speakers set up at my mum's so you would have appreciated the sound quality ;-) Birthday was spent over-indulging at an American Diner and watching Star Wars at the cinema. Boxing day felt like we spent the whole time winding each other up playing monopoly. My mum and her sister were ruthless, and my poor Grams had no idea how to play - "£220 for one property - no thank you, that's very expensive." How was yours?? Alas, I wish I was still basking in the afterglow, but I'm instead wallowing in seas of cardboard boxes and bubble wrap. The movers are coming on Monday and I turn procrastination into an art form.
from jimbostaxi :
With a sound bar that size you need a bigger set ! Come on now it's 2016 buy a set with some balls it should take up one whole side of your room and I should hear it from my house :9) happy belated New Years
from alethia :
Oh man. I'm a...I was going to say huge nerd, but I'm more of a moderate nerd. I like playing D&D. I like going to comic conventions. I collect Nintendo systems. But I also have my limit, and that limit is stupid steampunk. Steampunk is stupid and insulting on several of my geek levels.
from integrating :
Happy New Year's!
from nineofswords :
Seriously. on my wee, delicate eyelid lives Quasimodo's hump. I just won't blink in mixed company until it's gone. Easy peasy.
from nineofswords :
1. You've confirmed one of my worst fears about all males. 2. Gimme that sound bar 3. I do think most romantic relationships seem to require a lot of miserable crap that I hate to slog through. You are either super lucky, or fantastic at tuning shit out. LOL
from nilliem :
Yes yes, Happy New Year!! And whoo for the sound bar; if I had ANY room, I'd consider it. Btw, my house much emptier, much less hormonal, and ever, EVER, so much quieter. :) Thanks for the venting.
from misfitstray :
Thank you. I feel bad for my brother too. I tried to contact him several times with no success before, I just have to wait until he's ready again. He changes his phone numbers and email adresses like underwear and I don't have his homeadress to write letters... well, everybody has a way to go through live, we are individuals. He's just not made for this kind of society.
from eloira :
Happy New Year to you too! Sorry about the roast lamb - if it's any consolation there was far too big a veg:meat ratio, and we forgot the broad beans. As for the sound bar, when it vibrates everything around it to pieces and blows out the windows, and the expense is too great for another round of replacements, can I have it? Sounds like it was most definitely worth it!
from nineofswords :
That makes me want a sound bar. Would you believe I have a 55 inch curved screen 4D smart TV and I'm just using the sound that comes with the TV? It doesn't even get very loud. What have I been thinking??
from whystinger :
Happy new year Danger!
from integrating :
Happy New Year's Eve!
from yellow-ninja :
Accurate? http://mapsontheweb.zoom-maps.com/image/135126790311
from bantenhut :
Thank you, danger! That "Leap and the net will appear" line is a great one. Thank you so much for your encouragement! In other news, I read the post about your sister drumming at a concert. Sounds awesome! How are things in your world?
from sparkle-pink :
HI! Sorry! I am so bad for checking my notes. If you still want it, username is sparklepink, password is envelope :D
from jpop :
forever!
from bantenhut :
Oops! I accidentally posted this to my wall and not yours. You don't know that though. POOF. And I think you're correct, there is totally a corn stalk or two in Iowa. Hell, maybe even THREE! Over the top is where it's at! I just wrote a scene wherein the dancer gets a full scholarship to Julliard, a medal from the governor, and engaged - all in the span of one page! ...It's a dream scene. But anyway, OTT! Over the top! And yes, I need to check out more Girls Und Panzer. (Is it German or Japanese or Chinese?)
from nineofswords :
Very prudent of you to heed your mother's warning and make sure all was well with your intended before it was too late to back-peddle. Good women (and Weebles) wobble but they don't fall down.
from jimbostaxi :
Ty for the tips everything went well :0)
from whystinger :
Okay, I read a few recipes for Chao Tom. I'm calling to have them save me some sugar cane and I know the lady behind me has some cane growing. This will make me miss the fresh off the boat shrimp I used to get in Savannah, but I want to make this. Oh, I am thinking of planting some lemon grass. Think of a few recipes... AND no fair, you favor Jimbo more... Ha ha ha ha ha
from whystinger :
Chao Tom. Had it a few years ago at a Vietnamese restaurant and loved it. It was their version and it was on very skinny pieces of cane skewers through shrimp. Now I web search Chow Tom and I see that Chao Tom is SHRIMP PASTE on thicker pieces of sugar cane and I AM SO FUCKING PISSED I GAVE AWAY PIECES OF SUGAR CANE. Shit! Too bad my cane growing friends are 4.5 hours away, but I think I will still call them tonight and beg for them to save me a few stalks. I will cut them, dip the ends in wax and put in the Fridge and try freezing a few. I agree about Chubbles. Fucking cat has my heart.
from newschick :
WHAAAT! how in the world do you land a gig with PATH. anyway he's a fellow cranfordian? cranfordite? we did not shake hands. he was emceeing...wait for it... an annual rubber duck derby. so from 101.5 to PATH to rubber ducks...the guy's gotta be mafia.
from newschick :
lol collaborate. <3 i met b*rnie wagonbl*st recently. what a name, eh?
from bantenhut :
Haha! I love you, dangerspouse! Also, I'm not sure why, but I didn't get a notification that you commented...for the last three to four comments! Fuuuck! "De brie" everywhere, that is a great joke. :) I very much approve of your advice to not accept inertia, so thank you for that! Heavens, I have some dangerspouse reading to catch up on. Seriously though, your advice is absolutely welcomed, and has really brightened my day, so thank you. I remember you posting about Girls Und Panzer! What a funny premise, I've just watched the first few minutes of episode 1. And YES to punching my professor in the face. Grade A Yes. :D High five, my friend!
from curious-me :
Re: my buttercream icing. I probably should have clarified making the icing was fine but I made it to decorate a cake - a Hulk Hogan cake to be exact and working with it was a lot harder than I thought. If it was in the fridge too long it got too hard but if it sat out while I used it (unfortunately in the sun cause that's where my kitchen table is situated) it became super soft and runny. It was also my first time making it so I'm sure the recipe I used may have had something to do with it. But I've decided to stay away from making my own icing this weekend and go with the store bought stuff. I figure I'll be stressed enough in decorating the cake without having to worry about the icing.
from nineofswords :
That pie is history, my friend. :-)
from whystinger :
Read your note to Catsoul and you are spot on. What do you think of those alcoholics in recovery? I would imaging that they would not be the most credible. Also, while toggling back and forth, just discovered I missed two of your updates!
from catsoul :
Thank you so much for your thought. I do so get what you said. They have pickled thoughts. I forgot to mention how OCD her dad is and a control freak. I also think that they are in denial that their daughter's relationship is failing. No one is perfect, we work to improve hopefully. Some people never change, like them, and they think that my son should become a whole new person so that their daughter can have her way. Like she isn't perfect. There is alot of raised voices in their house and yelling. The other grandpa yelled at my granddaughter during a Packer game because she didn't flush her poop. That yelling behavior I heard about didn't win him any points from me. Never ever yell at a child. Actions speak so loud. They want to seem like so OK as people, but I know better. So again I want to thank you for your insight about people who are alcoholics. Take Care and have a marvey week. =^..^=
from misfitstray :
oh come on, you don't need to boast your ego and penis with the performance of NewWifey(tm)
from yellow-ninja :
Goneril's my hero. I think I'm more Cordelia, though, and my sister is that acid-tongued Goneril. Both sisters end up the same any way (dead, of course), so I suppose it doesn't matter too much. Both of us thankless wenches who have it coming.
from nineofswords :
Thank you for the kind note. They pulled a train on my wallet. Puppy is doing great today. Side note: I agree with your assessment of media people. My celebrity wrangling sibling can out-raunch the best of 'em. The radio people that I know seem to take it to a whole new level of inappropriateness, but the TV people are certainly pretty scandalous as well.
from stepfordtart :
Oh, and Me & Kryptonite (dont call him 'Mr', it gives him airs)? No. Never. Pretty sure he's best left as a fantasy. Real life couldnt possibly ever measure up for the performances he gives in my mind ;-) s x
from stepfordtart :
"de Brie". HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! s x
from raven72d :
As long as there's Chinese take-outee food, there'll always be a place for Riesling. I have to experiment with moscato for that, too--- see how General Tso likes it...or Singapore mei fun. The Bruno...ah, now. Worth the money to experiment, too--- of course.
from yellow-ninja :
What a brutal disappointment. Now I'll never know the fate of Alex!
from misfitstray :
googled as requested... Well, then - how could you interview Bill-IE Burke when she already died in 1970??? Uuuhm, and Billy Burke is an ugly ass.
from nineofswords :
I have a sibling who is a celebrity wrangler. I have, at times, known scandalous scoop I could have sold to that bird cage liner, The Enquirer.
from alethia :
OH. MY. GOD. MICHELLE BACHMANN?! I am a little bit jealous. I find her fascinating. Like a monkey that thinks it's people. But I feel for you: I don't think I'd last more than 7.5 minutes. After that, something would snap and I couldn't be held accountable for my action.
from yellow-ninja :
Michelle Bachmann?! Dear God. This note is coming too late to be of any use, no doubt, but I'm with shyest - ask about Gilmore Girls! That show was quality.
from melodymetuka :
Good luck!
from misfitstray :
Billy who...???
from shyest :
I always wanted to know what happened to his character Alex from the gilmore girls. He was only on 3 episodes but he was dating the main character Lorelai. They had two dates but it was never revealed how or why they broke up like he just disappeared. I don't know. Btw, I like your diary.
from jimbostaxi :
Here's a question for him if you had Bella, Beyoncé and Biel which one would he marry fuck and kill. Inquiring minds want to know!:0)
from raven72d :
I'll be doing some searching for that. That sounds as cool as the pieces I found--- P.G. Wodehouse writes "American Psycho" and Cormac McCarthy writes Jane Austen.
from peggypenny :
is Billy Burke the guy that has a dog face or the pale face guy that sucks blood?
from jimbostaxi :
She is but if she could talk she would say radio disc jockey are you freaking kidding me :0)
from kelsi :
Oh god, thank you for clearing that up about the walls of poop. You're right, he is full of shit.
from whystinger :
Thanks for the nagging... LOL. Thank you sincerely for the concern, I wrote,it because Imwas concerned too. The pattern is not much different, as I piss a whole lot in the mornings. Probably a good reason, I get up, drink a glass of water (or two) then have two large cups of coffee and either a glass of skim milk with breakfast and maybe more water or sometimes a 12 or 16 ounce Diet Coke or Pepsi. It was the different odor that caught my interest and I wish I would have checked my blood sugar level, even though it has always been fine I the past. I'm planning on scheduling an appointment with a doctor, as I need a doctor here. Thanks for the concern brother. Feel free to hold me accountable for the Doc visit
from phaythles :
Well the WHOLE lecture that my gma gives me about harboring murderous tendencies has multiple steps. She starts off by reminding me that Im not getting shit from the will so it wouldnt do me any good to "bump" her or have her "bumped". Then the questions start. 1) Do I feel the need to hack a person? 2) Do I still have friends? 3) How much alone time am I having? (This one depends on her mood and how many beers shes had. Sometimes Ive had too much alone time while others Im not getting enough alone time. Im not sure what the appropriate amount of alone time society deems is acceptable. Something tells me gma is making it up) 4) Do I dissect kittens? In regards to your wife scrap booking is completely overrated and EVERYONE deserves a hobby. So if she still has a friend and isnt alone all the time then she has successfully dodged the serial killer bullet. This means dissecting kittens is a quirky hobby. Think of it as a great conversational starter. She may even gain more friends and decrease her alone time. This makes it a win/win in my book.
from alethia :
Hahaha. No, not really. But extreme emotions make things crystallize perfectly into words, and the worst emotions last the longest. I do love my mom, but sometimes I hate her too. (And I got unofficial word today that my raise was approved! Whoo!) I can imagine radio is similar. I think all entertainment is very much the same. The most we can do is help other good ones climb the ladder with us.
from narcissa :
more like i always have this fear I'll be pulled into a back room as I cross the border.... yikes, yr border guards are grumpy.
from whystinger :
I sure hope those raccoons you were playing with weren't carrying rabies... Not really cool when they grab you. I had a neighbor that was fucked up pretty bad by a raccoon that had made its way onto her back porch. Lucky for her, it wasn't rabid, but it was thought it was suffering from canine distemper...
from phaythles :
My Gma watches her "murder mysteries". Those shows like the first 48 and snapped and crazy crap like that. So she likes to randomly call and make sure Im not a serial killer or dissecting kittens in my spare time. Cause you know its on the road of being a serial killer.
from phaythles :
You. I like you. I was like what type of tutu is that....and then laughed when I googled. You get a lot of fake internet points for that. And for your reward here is an inspirational quote to feed your soul: "If you want peace, you dont talk to your friends, you talk to your enemies."
from nineofswords :
I'm the Montague, Dammit! I am outraged that there is no Montague Mansion in Montague, NJ. Bollocks! (I've become very British since uncovering my title.) Zinc mine you say.... hmmm.
from nineofswords :
I hate when a "little person" with evil intentions reaches out from under my car and grabs my ankle, but I would take that over the horror of squishing adorable sandwich loving raccoons any day of the week. That would upset my whole world.
from nineofswords :
Since I am the Montague, they should welcome me in Montague, NJ. And maybe give me a huge house.
from kelsi :
I didn't win the race, but I did buy tampons. Thank you for your support.
from cocoabean :
I have a facebook account, but only look at it once a week or less... it's a timewaster, and I don't really need more of that. Sorry to hear about the carnage... could have made some good road pizza out of that! hahaha
from lust- :
Well, aren't you punny! That made me chuckle way more than it should have. Also, wrapping up stories in a funny way when the whole tale is already straight up hilarious...is a hard feat. You done good, Sir.
from nilliem :
heheh Raccoon..
from yellow-ninja :
I only run the fucking marathons - not a participant. Pretty good business in these parts, what with the bored suburban couples and all. I'm glad you survived your encounters with creatures four-legged and two. The only time my grandmother has ever telephoned me, it was because she thought she was calling her friend Delores. She hung up on me straightaway after learning her error.
from barefootruby :
oh yeah, there was a also a photo of a bottle of a milk with a padlock through the lid. Looks like your colleagues have got there before you!
from barefootruby :
My sister also fills FarceBook with pictures of cats. And bon mots relating to a healthy and active lifestyle. A Halloween post exhorted "run as if a hand has come out of the ground and grabbed your ankle". I pointed out that if a hand came out of the ground and grabbed my ankle I would trip over if I tried to run.
from eloira :
The cosplay is actually an Assassin's Creed character. Men's costumes seem to be much more fetching - but someone made this one epic, and female. My mind keeps wondering what'd happen if I turned up to the swanky gathering in it, but I haven't got the guts... Hoping all is well in Dangerhouse.
from integrating :
I don't have any plans of moving out on my own. I live out in the country and I have no vehicle and I don't want to move back to the city. Auntie seems to have changed her tune here lately. Things back to "normal".
from raven72d :
XO grade, then... I'll keep an eye out!
from raven72d :
Thanks! Much appreciated! I have a Dove dark chocolate bar close at hand, so I just may see about a wee dram of Ardmore with it... Armagnac! Now, then--- I have to go by my wine merchant on Saturday, so it may be time to do some looking!
from jimbostaxi :
:0) ty
from narcissa :
You understand the limitations of my liquor cabinet, so I assure you that it wasn't a dixie beer! In fact, i think it was a high life, so that probably makes you pretty glad it wasn't you.
from papotheclown :
I stayed out until like midnight on Halloween. I was very impressed with myself.
from jarofporter :
well, to be fair i guess, it *was* mr. garrison's classroom...
from tithonus :
Bit of both, really.
from raven72d :
Aha! There's a whole numerological thing there!
from aryssa90 :
I just dragged the husband to the midnight showing of rocky horror where people act it out and you yell obscenities at the cast/screen! But now I'm wondering if I should be worried about Bills possible homosexuality...
from jarofporter :
that's mr. mackey, mmm'kay? mr. garrison has mr. hat & mr twig... mm'kay?
from nineofswords :
Yes, I do eat those sugar free candies and I'm usually not tempted in the least to eat the regular stuff, but something about looking at 30 dollars worth of my old favorites got to me and I had the bright idea of taking a Metformin to counteract the sugar. "How bad could it be?" said foolish, foolish me...
from alethia :
Much good THAT would do. You're gay now, remember? Pantsless ladies are no longer reason to go anywhere!
from misfitstray :
Well, as long as there's noone I want to have sex with at the moment, I'm safe. Um, and about your coming out, well, yeah, I don't believe you.
from nineofswords :
I support you. It's a beautiful and valid choice.
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks for the note, I have to flip a mental switch and turn off my feelings while I'm here or I'd go postal in this bitch! They better hope she doesn't get any sicker.!! Oh and I expect a change in your blog to reflect your new gay status how does Dangergay hit ya? :0)
from catsoul :
hey man, thanks for your note. Yes to Sir Bounce A Lot. I hope also that she can be a Witch tonight. She could be a Witch every Halloween, making her costume different every year. I am all for nuturing creativity and imigination all the time. Excuse my spelling errors. You get the idea. Thanks again for caring, I do appreciate it. =^..^=
from narcissa :
i don't want to torture you, but my roommate left me a muffaletta in the fridge. First thing i ate. With a cold beer, sitting on the stoop. Cause it was 80 degrees out. It's good to be back.
from whystinger :
Now your coming out entry is hilarious! Due to the family genetics, I have been having the digital exam since I have been 25. Sometimes it is better than others, like the doctor who used half a tube of KY so it wouldn't be painful. All that goo in the crack of my ass did leave me feel a bit violated... LOL
from eloira :
......That is oddly tempting! Thanks too - the job would feed my love of travel for the price of a few souvenirs, so fingers crossed it comes through!
from eloira :
......That is oddly tempting! Thanks too - the job would feed my love of travel for the price of a few souveniers, so fingers crossed it comes through!
from peggypenny :
Glad to read that someone else does not T.V. it
from whystinger :
Fuckin-A, I know you are right about that toxicity. Good or bad (depending how it is looked it) I recognize much of her behaviors from working with a therapist on figuring out what my wife was doing. So far I recognize her power struggles, manipulations and several other behaviors. Thanks for the support.
from jarofporter :
too bad you're not, i could use all the help i can get on this project! ;-) (especially now with these ribs)... guess i'll just have to go buy one... :-/
from nineofswords :
Sadly, I was just making a play on words. There are no quickies or non-quickies in my current lifescape. Damn me and my irrational dedication to one who doesn't deserve it.
from yellow-ninja :
Always encouraging to have my backside supported. ;) Thanks!
from raven72d :
Well, as long as they give the dreams back...
from curious-me :
Ha - yup Christmas mode is wrong but thankfully that was just a moment of weakness. My best friend is DONE her Christmas shopping, wrapping and all, now THAT is just wrong. I am fully back in Halloween mode!
from nineofswords :
That quickie was so quick you missed it.
from jimbostaxi :
There's nothing like a good vomit to show a guy you missed him! It's from the old country and if you get chunks with it they really really love ya :0)
from kelsi :
Yeah, fighting over mulch, the height of sophisticated adulthood.
from integrating :
Haha! I can't get the police report for a couple of days, but I'm hoping and praying it's a legit address.
from melodymetuka :
Glad to read some fun stuff, congrats on stopping the JW's, and I hope the wife is feeling better already. ;-)
from alethia :
Okay okay okay. How 'bout this: every time swordfern updates, so will I.
from raven72d :
I must see this series! Merci!
from nineofswords :
Yezzzz... puppies are good stuff. Puppy shot went just fine. The Xanax worked wonders for my state of mind. But I'm about to work some more. I had to take a break and go run errands, but now I'm fidna sling some codes. PS: I know lots of radio personalities and postal workers who have to get up by 3 am for work ::shudder:: Do you do a morning show? What's your format?
from alethia :
I complained about an aggressive JW to my masseuse (the guy was out at 5am! FIVE IN THE AM! Walking down the street and approaching people waiting for the bus! He did it almost every damned day! One time he lectured me for not wanting his reading material..)...anyway...it turned out my masseuse and his wife are both JW's. Yaaaaay...At least he's a really good masseuse, soooo...woohoo?
from jimbostaxi :
I'm coming to the Danger mansion with a bible and I expect my Tea and Redtube running ! ;o) please have some finger foods ready too as I will be there awhile. Thanks for the note into each life some rain must fall I guess it's my turn to get drenched. I'm actually on vacation at the moment I go back Thursday night but I feel more freaking tired now then when I'm at work.
from misfitstray :
Who speaks of libido? I meant horniness. That kind where you want to force yourself on someone who wasn't able to flee within 3 seconds I spotted him or her... I think my libido is quite normal. But I hold it in check, so nothing happens.
from misfitstray :
I'm pretty sure that I wrote that fact in one of my former emails right in the beginning. Well, no prob, I got used to such things as being a pain in the ass when it comes to going from house to house. When people say that they don't want to be visited anymore in a sincere earnest way, we accept that and we make a note and try not to show up anymore in the near future. Maybe we'll try to come by any other 2 years or so. (At least it is handled this way in Germany) You'll never know what happens in mankinds lifes. Someone dies, someone gets ill, you never know and people are searching for answers. But mostly people lie to our faces and say "no time", I'm in a hurry" or such things or just "we are/I'm not interested". That doesn't include that they don't want to be visited. So we show up again and again.
from jarofporter :
ugh. low blow, dude... ;-)
from whystinger :
Nice way to win against the Jehovah's Witnesses. When I tried my version of that, they sent in reinforcements. They knocked at the door and asked if I had a church. I had just purchased a heavy metal album from the band Metal Church, so I grabbed the album and showed the the cover, while putting the CD on and cranking the shit out of the sound. They left only to return with more people and wanted to discuss their beliefs. I told them I believed in Metal and worshipped at the Heavy Metal altar... I had to stop answering my door for the next three months... but back then, we did not have internet TV. Nice win, I salute y'all.
from comebacktome :
Oh and just so you know- I love these stories of your wife being badass. They make my day!
from comebacktome :
Hello! I didn't realise you had left me notes, apologies! So, first of all, thank you for not teasing me about becoming a spinster in my sensitive moment. I did get to the airport- my mum actually drove me, but only because she got caught up with another errand and couldn't go into work anyway. And we were just making roast veggies, nothing fancy. They had roast chicken, but I made a roasted cauliflower with a tahini yoghurt sauce that is fucking delicious. The moroccans know their shit with veggies.
from misfitstray :
o_O oh come on Man! We are not that bad! I would have watched with you and your wife that red tube and left a real huge stack of literature at your house. I would come back also ;)
from yellow-ninja :
Goats are adorable! I spent just the other night watching goat videos on YouTube. No bukkake follow-up, but man, your wife - steel, that woman.
from whystinger :
Duuude!
from glorycloud :
I read 35 years ago "The Hobbit" but not the other volumes in the Lord of the Rings series. I bought these volumes for our grandchildren. I rarely read fantasy literature. I mainly read non-fiction-I also did not see all of the Lord of the Ring movies-though I think I saw one of the movies with our children several years ago-peace
from bedbunny :
You're crazy lol no way am I posting pics lol I am lemon juice and peroxide that way it'll taste like lemonade from a doctor's office.. or.... something..
from nineofswords :
Who you tellin? I'm in ICD 10 hell. However, I'm starting to memorize these bad boys and I am adapting. The old ICD 9 codes look like words to me and these new codes are crazy looking, but I shall survive this.
from bedbunny :
I guess I should drink half a bottle of wine and leave notes more often! .. the half bottle of wine part is already a given anyway.. (and it was supposed to be "dic" not "dich" but I've been learning German and my phone auto corrected my intentional misspelling incorrectly *hulk smash phone*)
from misfitstray :
The hair will be cut! No matter how loud you shout. I don't like hair anywhere and it's being shaved or epilated or cut EVERYWHERE! Your wife is awesome!
from bedbunny :
Jus wait'll u c mah dich .. jk idk wtf im talking about.
from bedbunny :
Big dicks screw everything up for everyone, always. It was a bacon cheeseburger sushi roll on the grill, stuffed with cheese and brushed with bbq sauce in the last few minutes of cooking. I'm not sure what you are thanking me for, all I do is destroy dreams... and pecans...
from barefootruby :
Anna-Lee Pedantic has forced me to point out that in your comment about me in your buddy list, you mean "such as me" not "like me". Though neither statement is actually true. :-)
from berkinix :
Thanks for the tip on shredding large quantities of meats. Might come in handy when I become a cannibal someday. :P Oh, and I actually hate fondant, marshmallow or otherwise. I'm making the chocolate cake with fondant because that's what was asked for. I prefer me a good buttercream anyday. And yes, I've tried the one with creme anglaise. I used it for almond duquois once, but found the cookies too sweet for the frosting, which is to frickin' DIE for. But yes, fondant's overrated. When it comes to aesthetics, I would prefer to use marzipan anyway.
from barefootruby :
a propos your post about the poop transplant cure for c-diff, I've just read hat you can get paid $40 a deposit for poop donation. ps - if you were to have shot a moose on your CA trip, surely it would have had to hang for a few weeks before it were ready to eat
from bedbunny :
Hmm.. I think someone has already started that trend... MY PLANS ARE FOILED ONCE AGAIN!
from berkinix :
Yeah, I guess the only sure things in life nowadays are death, taxes, and abscesses. More like abscASSes, amirite? Ugh. I just facepalmed myself.
from happyone :
Hey, thanks for the note! I didn't know anyone actually read my diary! Well, you'll be happy to know that I have changed a lot since I was 14 thirteen years ago! I DID learn to cook, and I actually quite enjoy it. I'm not whipping up 5 course meals or anything, but I find lots of recipes on Pinterest that are tasty and easy enough to follow (and usually have something to do with pasta). I was all prepared for a "historic rain event" this weekend thanks to Joaquin, but it turned out to be anything but! No heavy consistent rains as predicted and no flooding. Lol oh well, I'm still prepared with my gallons of water and flashlights aha!
from nineofswords :
Libran = One who is born during the time of year when the Sun is in Libra. We tend not to appreciate the baser bodily events, such as the fart and belch.
from nineofswords :
I know it is hard for you to believe, since you've been thoroughly and repeatedly c-diffed by your own delicate flower named New Wifey, but I'm a proper Libran, not likely to ever admit to bodily functions, much less share them with another soul. I carry a tampon in my glove box to use as a threat to passengers in my vehicle. Farters will be plugged.
from papotheclown :
It would be really funny if Dr. Vasectomy was just a dermatologist with a very tragic last name.
from glorycloud :
Thanks for the note about making videos. Something of what you wrote in your note I remember from my Preaching classes in Bible College and Seminary. I studied to be a gospel preacher. In watching my video you can see why I would not make a good preacher. I tend to follow the Beat view of writing meaning no revision. But I will follow some of your advice-peace
from buffylass :
Thankyou so much, you're very kind!
from jimbostaxi :
Shit it would take me about 15min to get up there doing about 70 mph ! He mentioned that it might be hid in and abandoned house on my block I'm going get a search party together and break in there! Lol
from nineofswords :
Thank you kind sir for the Birthday wishes. If I possessed a fart gland, my farts would smell like cake every day, even without eating the cake to fuel them, but alas, I am far too ladylike for such things. Delicate, magical, and flower-like am I.
from nineofswords :
Well, I spent my formative years in Colorado Springs and now I live in Texas, but I go back to Colorado once a year and I plan to get a summer home there as soon as I can reasonably swing it. I may eventually move back there full time. And you are most welcome for the mention.
from yellow-ninja :
Close! He actually said everything outside of NY is "farms or shit".
from dangerspouse :
Aha! Then your co-worker no doubt explained the true-ism to you that goes "Everything west of the Delaware River" (he might say "Hudson" if he's hardcore, but whatever) "is Cow Country. Even LA." Whew. I'm glad we got that settled. And hey - where would be be without armpits? Disarmed, that's where! And we can't have THAT in America, so you're welcome.
from yellow-ninja :
Now you've gone and done it. Forty percent, mister. Colorado is not quite 40 percent high plains. The eastern high plains slope upwards for 200 miles before a person reaches ranges that include 54 mountains of 14,000 feet or greater and over 800 peaks between 11,000 and 14,000. But you don't have to pay attention to this bumpkin - one of my coworkers who is from NY tried to help me understand your NJ perspective today at lunch. I think we worked it out. So, you just go ahead and enjoy your traffic-y armpit of a state, and I'll enjoy never walking uphill in mine. I can't believe I'm from NE, and you're trying to give me shit about CO being flat.
from nineofswords :
How could you not love Colorado?! It's my favorite place on the globe and I've been everywhere! You were in my hometown, Colorado Springs. Well, as hometown as an Army brat can get. Oh, and... we call the golden corral "The Golden Rat" which seems appropriate.
from jarofporter :
well, c'mon - i can't let an unsubstantiated claim like that stand without some sort of corroboration! :-P
from yellow-ninja :
Colorado is flat. Colorado, with the Rocky Mountains running right through it, is FLAT. Ok. Also, the Census Bureau would like a word with you: http://www2.census.gov/geo/pdfs/maps-data/maps/reference/us_regdiv.pdf
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks for your notes, sweet pea. Made me smile that you know the Goons, but you're a radio man, so of course you do. Glad you and wifey are back out and about xx
from jarofporter :
gonna need to see that link to, uhh... verify your assessment. yeah.
from yellow-ninja :
Dang! You were knocking right around my 'hood. At my former school, I could see Pikes Peak from my classroom. Sounds like you didn't have too bad a time (aside from DIA, but DIA always sucks)! I have a bone to pick, though - as Nebraskan (former?), the Midwest stops at North Platte (the self-proclaimed gateway to the West and home of Buffalo Bill Cody's Ranch, natch). Anything farther west, but short of California is "a mountain state" or just "the West". And yeah, sorry my current state stinks like skunk. My 'burb doesn't allow the sale of weed, but most around here do. It's pretty disgusting.
from whystinger :
Glad new wifey is doing better! Enjoyed seeing the meat celebration you did. I have been told that vegetarians should be cooking for a minimum of two hours a day. Odd that you gained weight. I know a lot of vegetarians who have gained weight, but I figured that was because they bought a lot of prepared meals, with high fat contents. I had something witty to say but forgot it...
from jarofporter :
yeah, i really wasn't in the mood for ITLAPD last year, so i half-assed it. wanna hear something funny? for a week before the holiday, i pasted that, word-for-word, into my online dating profile! if anything, it just made my visits/likes drop even lower... lol
from misfitstray :
bad joke, man! Thank you for your offer on your Saab :) If it wouldn't be that expensive to fly over and get that vehicle over the big pond, I would take it. Though, I'm stuck with my 1000€-Saab. The tile stove isn't in my kitchen. It's in the common room where I eat among other things. It's installed solely for heating. Good luck with traveling through "Pope-country".
from aryssa90 :
I prefer to be referred to as my real title, Guttersnipe. The G is capitalized.
from nineofswords :
That is "The No-Fucking Pope" to you, Mister.
from annanotbob2 :
It won't let me read you on my phone, says I'm too young. You're writing about your bottom, aren't you? Hope all is well with you both, as well as poss in the circs xx
from jarofporter :
hey - saw you were online, wanted to say hi. good to see you here again.
from aryssa90 :
I fell off my low carb wagon. But I'm hopping back up on the meat train tomorrow. You may take that as you will.
from alethia :
Hahaha. I'm still on that job. I'm under such a huge stack of NDA's I'm scared to fart, much less blog. I should again, though, shouldn't I.
from kelsi :
Unfiltered apple cider vinegar with the mother costs tons! Tons!
from eloira :
I was kinda with your wife on that one too... Especially after being with someone for half a decade who can't cook more than 3 dishes... Glad she's doing a little better - hoping the end (of C-Diff) is nigh! Also, try not to go too un-veggie too much - it also plays havoc with the guts...
from alethia :
I bought a box of leather working tools recently, from an estate. It was filled with your usual assortment of awls and skivers and things...and two Zwilling paring knives, still in the box! I thought of you when I found them. I cackled to the sky.
from yellopenguin :
oh how funny! penguins rarely (no, never) factored into my blogging life back in the day, but i'll try to remedy that this time around :)
from integrating :
Thanks for the note. The little bugger wrote another song. He's so cool. :)
from aryssa90 :
Glad to hear she's better! I've been doing the low carb high protein thing and lemme tell you. It gets old. I'm not an awesome cook like some people *ahem*. When I was a vegetarian for a whole six months in high school, I gained weight too. Meat is life!
from catsoul :
hi...glad she is better. Though don't you think two months is too long? I do. She should just get the fecal transplant anyway so things keep getting better for her. Wow, again I say that is too long for c-diff. WTF is wrong with her doctors? Perhaps you should change doctors to one that is more aggressive in treatment so she can be healthier. I have a question, I don't suppose she can work. I had to not work during my bowel c-diff crisis. Enough said. Take care you two. =^..^=
from buffylass :
Hahaha hopefully arts & crafts will never happen again, or if it does it'll happen in a room with lots and lots of bottles of wine. Thankyou! :)
from yellow-ninja :
That is a ton of meat. I was going to say "shit ton", but couldn't work out the rest of the joke (I've been grading the ridiculous prose of 16-year-olds all day and my brains are fried). I am a failure. But really glad to hear NewWifey doesn't need your crapsule any longer. What a long, awful ordeal for her (and you!).
from nineofswords :
How ironic that "Option number two" was actually "number 2".
from raven72d :
We must all think more about pemmican!
from yellopenguin :
hi hi. who are/were you, stranger who remembers me somehow?
from catsoul :
loved your note....hahahahahahahaha.....you two could be brothers. Have a good day. =^..^=
from yellow-ninja :
So glad to see your link in red! Really well said in your entry. I avoided all forms of media yesterday for that very reason. And I realized with a start yesterday that my students, born in 1999 and 2000 and 2001, have no concept of what that day was like or of what it was like to live in our world before it happened. I think the change is probably coming pretty soon, based on their lack of any sort of visceral reaction or expression towards 9/11. They're solemn and vaguely sad, but there's no histrionic edge to it.
from barefootruby :
There's a long-running radio comedy show here in UK-land that generally pokes fun at the week's news. It had already been recorded and ready to air before the Columbine shootings. To answer critics who might complain about such a comedy show being aired in such circumstances, the host recorded an introduction: "tragedies happen, but life goes on - it has to".
from cocoabean :
Glad to see you post! 9-11 is the reason I stopped watching news shows. None. At all. And I really don't miss it.
from ninabean :
Its time for my annual note to you!! I truly hope things are looking better in terms of your wifes health! I can not even imagine what that must be like. Nor can I imagine myself with a kitchenaid mixer -- only because they are so damn pricey. I mean factor in the costs of buying moo-moo's and stronger furniture (because I would eat nothing but homemade bread and cakes all day everyday) and its just not feasible for me. Thoughts and positive energy being sent your way. <3 I'll be back in 2016 and there better be an update ;)
from narcissa :
it's september now, just checking in.
from narcissa :
everything okay over there? Hope you're too busy making out and gorging on your latest concoctions to update.
from jarofporter :
kinda wondering how it's going over there - hope yous are alright...
from nineofswords :
I hope you guys are ok over there. Awfully quiet...
from catsoul :
7/28/15....Again, c-diff, fucking no. I feel so bad, gut wrenching actually for her. Fecal transplant. Help her. People die from c-diff, being honest about it. I sort of recall my stay in CCU and ICU myself with c-diff. Don't let it get to the point where it perforates her bowels or the bacteria infection attacks the heart like it did me. Be her advocate and get her into a specialist. Oh my god, I hated reading about her troubles, and bless you too. Take Care. =^..^=
from peggypenny :
Lie about Orgasm? Heck, No. My Lovers are all well trained.
from glittered :
Life happened, I guess. Too much pride to write, unabashed, the way I used to. That or a feeling of dead weight deep inside me that I just can't shake.
from notunique :
Thank you!
from yellow-ninja :
Happy anniversary! So sorry to hear that NewWifey is still getting slammed by that nasty stuff. I hope a quick turn around is in her future (and yours! Being a caretaker is a stressful, exhausting business).
from nineofswords :
I'm sorry to hear that your wife has c-diff again. When patients in a rehab hospital have c-diff, it puts them in the second to highest "tier level" of payment because of the difficulty in treating it. Patients on long term antibiotics are susceptible to c-diff. It can be deadly. As soon as she can, and forever more she needs the best probiotic available. Renew Life Probiotic 50 Billion would be a life changer.
from misfitstray :
too bad that this antibiotic wasn't good for your wife :( I hope that she gets well again soon!!! c.diff sucks!!!
from newschick :
cool whip? GROSS! love my kitchenaid...whipped up a batch of blueberry muffins (jersey fresh!) in it this weekend that were divine. i'm by no means a professional, but i spend more and more time each week learning about food and cooking. it's absolutely amazing what fresh ingredients do for a wannabe chef. that's probably been my biggest 'advancement'... i still use a few cans and jars, but most of my meals are fresh fresh fresh. agree that skills > gadgets but i do love my gadgets! i need better knife skills. i'm much better these days, but i'm also a southpaw with zero coordination. ;)
from whystinger :
Prayers for you both and make sure you take care of YOU while you both are going through this. You will get through it.
from raven72d :
Next Saturday for ribs! There's a great place not too far away! Chateau Yquem! That's a legendary name--- and I'm not sure I've ever even see a bottle with their label! But I will keep an eye out...the Y sounds interesting.
from annanotbob2 :
Hugs to you both xx
from nineofswords :
LOL! Yes, the multi-millionaire stays in contact, hoping for a status change.
from peggypenny :
What? You would "make up" a brother just to "nail me head?" How dare you 'Danger.' "You dirty rat, you dirty rat."
from misfitstray :
Just read about c-diff on the internet. What kind of antibiotics does your wife get? I read that in 2012 there was a new one very successful. Fidaxomin. 200 mg Fidaxomicin all 12h oral. It had a permanent success!
from raven72d :
Thanks for the encouragement!
from peggypenny :
You have a brother?
from catsoul :
Thanks for the note. Hope all is going well for your wife and you. I appreciate the humor, without humor and laughter it would still be funny. Anyhoo, I don't have anything else. Just take it easy the two of you. =^..^=
from misfitstray :
Wow, a stuffed panda. Never thought of such a pet. Isn't it a bit too big? Maybe I'll stay with my spiders and silverfishes. My spiders grew pretty much as I feed them from time to time. I throw flies I find on the floor into their webs and after a while I find spider poop under it. I see that they are really big now as the size of their poop is growing too. Did you know that spider poop is sticky?
from peggypenny :
Did you hear on the news that the FDA is going to start banning trans fats within next three years? No more cake sprinkles.
from eloira :
So sorry it reminds you of cow hooves, but I'm still taking it as a compliment! Er, why yes... Staple gun, that's it! One of many such accidents. Couldn't get the staples out, so just left 'em.
from nineofswords :
You are welcome. I'm going to write an entry about the tickling divers. You can trust me, I'm practically a doctor. LOL
from narcissa :
egh, sorry, this is turning into a long haul deal. That is some serious shit you're describing going down over there. Really appreciate your capacity to write it with a smile, no matter how twisted. Not easy, hope it all gets better soon.
from narcissa :
egh, sorry, this is turning into a long haul deal. That is some serious shit you're describing going down over there. Really appreciate your capacity to write it with a smile, no matter how twisted. Not easy, hope it all gets better soon.
from yellow-ninja :
I was quoting him! He said "The Ukraine" every time he mentioned it (though he did also say, "The Ukraine, Russia, whatever" at one point, too, which was confusing - he probably just assumed I'm like all Americans and don't know jack about geography). I'm going for authenticity here, mister.
from yellow-ninja :
Dang! Poor NewWifey. She's really had a rough go of it the last few months. Hoping for a quick recovery and future health!
from nineofswords :
C diff is nothing to mess around with. Wifey needs a serious gut health regimen. 4 products: Brand: Renew Life Ultimate Flora probiotic (a life changer) Norwegian Gold Super critical omega, FiberSmart, and DigestMore. Those 4 products will help her. They are all in cobalt blue bottles with yellow labels and you can get it at CVS. And she must avoid nuts and seeds and other small, indigestible things.
from peggypenny :
Yes, they are salad recipes with dressing recipes. Oh boy, so funny to see them calling for real mayo, heavy cream, butter...
from whystinger :
Well, with that definition, I was really married. I have had to come running and check out her poop. In fact, I had to wipe her ass and wash it after she had hemorrhoid surgery. Wow. C-diff is no joke. I second the fecal transplants, plus have they suggested any other things? I'm sorry to hear she is not doing well again.
from eloira :
I will! In the meantime will have to dig out one from a few months ago. I looked like a My Little Pony, but I loved it. Poor wifey - sounds like tough times... Hope better days are not so far away for you both!
from catsoul :
6/14/15....hi. You know they do fecal transplants now to improve the chances of not dying from c-diff. I was one of the lucky ones not to die. So you should look into the procedure. It works and no more antibiotics. Take care. =^..^=
from misfitstray :
That doesn't seem to be good news. All the best for NewWifey(tm) I hope she recovers very quickly! ♥
from peggypenny :
bought a hand written recipe card file from thrift store, dates 1963. Has delightful recipes before no fat and Adkins diets. I was glad to read that wife2 is feeling well. Peggy
from misfitstray :
I miss you my friend! And I'm just thinking about that threesome. I might bring a friend. You can handle 3 women? ;)
from aerisbear :
Thank you, I didn't think anyone would notice.
from movingsands :
You know, from your stories I imagined NewWifey(tm) had small amounts of patience. But Geezus, egg stiching? That speaks of waaay more than small amounts. And wonderful hands.
from narcissa :
this is exactly the problem with going to paris with another person: they will want to eat your foie gras.
from candoor :
i checked my buddy list for the first time in years and there you were which means you are still here which is somewhat amazing to me as staying in one place has always been some sort of art form i've yet to perfect... kind of like juggling, only with less movement... for all the winding words you've shared and still share, thanks, and here's to hoping you are enjoying a happy and healthy winderful life...
from whystinger :
Hotel breakfasts are usually crap and make me gassy too. I suspect it is the powered egg product or whatever crap they use. Seriously. When I have to go to our office, there is a convenience store with a ton of Mexican customers and their tamales are better on my stomach than hotel breakfasts.
from daath :
I appreciate it. Here's to hoping.
from raven72d :
Thank you--- very much so.
from peggypenny :
slim fast beer: 3/4 cup diet 7up. 1/4 cup black coffee. ice optional
from comebacktome :
I didn't let him get away so much as he freaked out that I would leave him and left me first and broke my heart. That and he was a fucking mess, so he was right, I would have left him. While he was amazing in bed, he wasn't good for me or good for my life. *shrugs* It happens!
from nineofswords :
In response to the message you left which was apparently brought to me by the letter I, I have this to say: Incomprehensible! Indefensible!! (and Impressive)
from raven72d :
The Goon Show! Yes! (And thank you for the kind words! Glad to know you're out there reading me!)
from nineofswords :
Thankyewwww, Thank yew ver much.
from ahopeinhell :
I don't mind, he's nice and encouraging. :) Thanks for the visit and kind words! Your last entry was eggscellent (groan). I don't know how anyone could manage embroidery on an egg, but I'm impressed.
from jarofporter :
i think an american might be the only one to get that euphemism (actually, i expected it to be just midwesterners. unless you're just pretending to know!? lol) anyway, thanks for the brine tip - can you suggest ratios (water/salt/sugar)? i'd like to try it on those breasts (again, not a euphemism!)
from her-story :
You? Not. Dirty? And, not swear? LMAO... that's fucking hilarious!
from her-story :
Those eggs are super awesome...
from yellow-ninja :
Exactly! If I stop seeing him, I might have to start seeing someone whom I actually see. And who wants that?
from chakra-nadi :
Vegan. I can not kill an animal, even when it may be more humane to do so. My strength. My failing. If someone can not kill the animal themselves, then they should not be eating it. I hate hypocrisy.
from nineofswords :
Villainous Veggie reViler! Crucifier of cruciferous crunchables!!
from nineofswords :
Thank you kind sir for the nice message. I would highly recommend Germany as a vacation spot. I would love to go to Germany again. And I shall, God willing and weather permitting!
from aryssa90 :
I read it before Tuesday. I'm a rebel like that. Thank you for the birthday wishes, I've ways wanted a personal greeting from Seneca Crane. In my mind, you still rocked the Seneca whilst writing that ;)
from stepfordtart :
Haha! I see your 'Man at a Needlework Con' and raise you 'Woman at a Guitar Con'.....Never BEEN so damn popular! *sigh* Those were the days :-) s x
from jimbostaxi :
Hey Ty for the note! forced parity goes on here I'm not sure if it happens anywhere else. I just know it's not the answer the company acts like its the great benefactor when it is probably the biggest evil. You screw with a guys money I assure you the end results will be to no ones liking. :0)
from nineofswords :
I'm sorry about the 6 part rant on my own special narcissist. I should apologize to everyone publicly. hahaha. I had to get it out of my system and now it's done. Plus, I didn't know I had actual readers who were going to suffer along. AND... let me just say... the NIPPLE BUTTON is located in a gift shop somewhere in Germany. :-)
from yellow-ninja :
That Sunbeam kettle really is the best! And kudos on the not-dirty story - just so many filthy plays on words you successfully avoided.
from nineofswords :
To answer your question about almond flour, I am not sure it is measured cup for cup, but there are many almond flour bread recipes that give full instructions. If you are on Facebook, look up "Low carbing among friends". There are all kinds of recipes for breads on that page. Also, google up some recipes. I will be getting back into blogging about low carb living very soon. I've been hung up on the realization that my ex is a big ole narcissist, but I'm wrapping that up today, I think.
from nineofswords :
Hey! Believe it or not, I just found your notes for the very first time on 5/24/15. In fact, this is the first time I've known that there were ANY notes!! I cannot believe people have been reading this blog and posting notes. Thanks! I'm going to read yours too!!
from peggypenny :
Your picture surprised me. I imagined you look like Ringo in Tombstone. Ha ha
from misfitstray :
It's raining in Munich day and night, it's crowded, it's loud, it's ugly, people are unfriendly, I have to work. Well, I'm just in a very bad mood, that's the main reason.
from movingsands :
Ha! The evolution of your beard, or of her sexual fantasies. Or devolution?...
from stepfordtart :
When she gets to fulfil her 'Hitler Fuck Fantasy' you'll be on the home straight, I think - there'll be almost nothing left. Although, it could go vertically rather than horizontally and youll be an unwitting 'George Benson Fuck Fantasy'. Hmm. s xx
from realchild :
there SHOULD be discounts, glad someone gets it. mr. fancy beard.
from misfitstray :
Forgot about speeding. Didn't learn that. I'm a natural in this area ;)
from misfitstray :
Well, they liked all of it. As their youngest kid (11) didn't went with the others we couldn't watch movies rated higher than 12 *sigh* We watched Guardians of the Galaxy. The kid loved the oreos best. And yes, peanut M&Ms are the best! But I didn't eat. Got drunk on Desperados. At least someone (-thing) joined my desperate-horny mind-body... Is that you in the first pic? o_O
from yellow-ninja :
Thank you! I was sure trying to reach them. As awful as it was to watch them cry, it was also nice to know I got 'em.
from peggypenny :
Wow, I'm going to have to watch "hunger games."
from comebacktome :
No, keep using big words, it keeps me on my toes! I almost never get to use my degree, so I like it :D
from tithonus :
I'm actually a teacher rather than a waiter, and the "chef" is the person who developed the curriculum I'm teaching. He is a terrible person in almost every way. Your general point about looking elsewhere for work is a good one, though, and I am just on the verge of doing something about that...
from misfitstray :
Thank God for little blessings and "onion breath" ;) I am very afraid of your wife, man! But if she would like a threesome, I'd be all in ;) If you like I could tell about other visits to the club in one of my next entries. I went there a few times a few years ago. But I'm sorry, no pics *sigh*. It's not allowed to take pics there.
from daath :
I give it up for a few days here and there to assure myself that it isn't full-blown alcohol abuse.
from eloira :
Oh my, she actually did a good job considering the instruments of torture you described for the de-bearding! Hope you both made the most of it...
from comebacktome :
Your words for sex are the best. I only just twigged to them and I have a masters in linguistics- I am impressed! Carry on good sir!
from stepfordtart :
Heeheheee! Thats really cool! :-) s x
from whystinger :
She really did a good job! You look like a guy I sold a motorcycle to in Jersey City.
from movingsands :
lol! she really did do an amazing job of it!
from cocoabean :
Which picture is of you? Both men look the same;)
from whystinger :
I have returned. Hope all is well. and the Subaru is running well.
from alethia :
Brah. Where you at? It's been radio silence from you for ages. (HAR HAR. GET IT. BECAUSE YOU WORK IN RADIO.) (Sorry, that wasn't really funny at all. I'll just go now.)
from shoelacepunk :
oh, that problem was sorted out months ago, but i recently got a surprise leftover medical bill. my physical health is great; the jury is still out on my mental health ;) thanks for checking in. i hope you're doing well!
from cdghost :
x
from eloira :
Vietnam is definitely worth it - the food is incredible!! I did not try any of the frogs mind you - they were numerous, sat happily together in open baskets... I'll have to get a picture of them next time.
from stepfordtart :
I can second the deliciousness of barefootruby's cookie/sherry/cake thingy because my mum makes a very similar one. s x
from ping-island :
i honestly spent a couple days thinking about that joke and trying to figure out if i was missing something, but no, it's just that bad! i love it. here's my favorite bad joke: why do seagulls live by the sea? because if they lived by the bay, they'd be bay-gulls.
from alethia :
Watch out with those many beards. A shoreside contractor came in this week, and he had a beard so thick it absorbed light. My ovaries exploded on sight.
from barefootruby :
Both desserts are a piece of piss to make: dessert # 1. Dip chocolate chip cookies in sherry for a few seconds – long enough to get impregnated, not so long that they get soggy – and sandwich together with whipped cream. Arrange as a log. If there’s any cream left over, use it to cover the finished log. You can use orange juice instead of sherry if you are preparing for younglings (as I was). Dessert #2 is a variation on eton mess. Double Cream, crème fraiche, cold custard. About equal quantities, but adjust to taste. There might be some plain yoghurt in there too, I can’t remember. Whip the cream, mix in the other stuff. Mix in some soft fruit (strawberries and raspberries work well) and broken meringue pieces.
from stepfordtart :
http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=256855195 YUMYUMYUM! s x
from jimbostaxi :
I would be lying if I said it was completely gone :0) walking down the stairs can be very interesting endeavor other than that I don't really notice it much.
from barefootruby :
Similar to your 'new wifey', the 'C' in CGF stands for 'current' which is also somewhat unnecessary.
from stepfordtart :
"could suck-start a Harley Davidson" is also good. s x
from movingsands :
haha, I'm thinking big thing in the 90's (although this was '03)
from catsoul :
3/21/15....oh my god I laughed so hard my tummy full of jello was giggling too!! That Animal Crossing saga is great. I so get it, I do. I used to play Animal Crossing and don't you know, a person can never have too many bells. Come on, your Wife will get it down the road. You go man, play. Take Care. =^..^=
from stepfordtart :
We have Christmas decorations up, too. Giant silver snowflakes are perpetually in mid-descent from our conservatory ceiling. I am too puny to do the whole 'lifting into the loft' thing and L is too sick (he was 'too bone idle' between Jan 5 - Feb 20, now he's too sick). s x PS Beards goooooooooooooooood. Oh, SO good.
from misfitstray :
Hey, what's going on in your life and the dilemma with the car? I miss your entries. A lot! Hope you are ok.
from tithonus :
Thanks! What can I say, little birds will whisper...
from fifidellabon :
Hi! BTW, I think that's 72 Virginians you'd get...XOFifi
from newschick :
i'm moving from cranford to cranford. ;) we are very original.
from aryssa90 :
Ive succeeded in making the world's best chocolate chip cookies. I also made peanut butter cookies, mint chocolate chip cookies and Star Wars themed Wookie Cookies, a pre-homage to Han Solo crashing the WW2 equivalent of the Millenium Falcon perhaps?
from stepfordtart :
Ive gone back and read properly now. The demise of a car is a lamentable thing to be sure - may it rise, Lazarus-like from its own ashes, and be restored to its former glory ere too long. My husband/your car - theyre pretty much interchangeable now, arent they? ;-) xx
from rockhound :
Sorry to hear of your vehicle's untimely abdication. I'm glad you were able to scrape up enough pennies, virgins and anything else that could be sold, to pay the blood money for the replacement engine. Too bad your vehicle was bought in Jersey. Here, you'd have owned the dealership and the dealer's kids under the terms of our lemon law. You can screw over employees sixty ways, but God help you if you screw over a car buyer.
from catsoul :
What would life be really like without a few unexpected surprises, right? So car getting fixed, food, booze, and a week off, sounds pretty darn good. I get having to go to bed early to rest to get ready for the next snow shoveling marathon. Have joy will shovel. Take Care man, you are doing great. =^..^=
from stepfordtart :
Hey hey! Imma go back and read your tale of woe when Ive got a bit more time. If there's gonna be schadenfreude then I want the full effect. Thanks for your kind note - no punching in the face necessary - L is hanging in there, got some horrible things to have done to his poor old body today, but still hanging in there. Very very sorry if my entry made it sound as though he wasnt. Thanks for thinking of us, I do really appreciate it. s xx
from msafire :
Check Enterprise for weekend specials on rentals. This might not be helpful, as you might need car during week but until Faith is fixed, some local Enterprise Rent a Car places have weekend deals of 9.99 per day weekends only from Fri to MON , cause you know with this weather few are renting cars for weekend getaways as they do the rest of the year. Cars will sit, or they can be rented cheaply. JUst search Enterprise 9.99 and see if you find the link should this be helpful
from msafire :
glad notes ARE back- I just laughed harder than I have in so long that I can't recall the last time it happened! Thanks!!
from peggypenny :
Diary back, ug. Yippy. How's things? I got my muse. Forgot walking buddy and I am in love with a bridge writer. Pegster
from kelsi :
You're right, it was the lid she slammed down, not the seat. Can't believe that made it past the editor!
from stepfordtart :
Wait! Whut? Notes are BACK! OMFG!......Oh, wait, I dont have anything to say. Dammit. s x PS Coeur a la Creme *droooooooool*
from integrating :
Yay! Notes! I sympathize with you about being out in freezing weather. It actually hurts my skin. "It rubs the lotion on its skin."
from misfitstray :
don't know about the names of 7 dwarfs as I only heard about them in the rated versions. I would name them not horny and not grumpy but tinky, tealy, twunky, tonkey, twanky, twenky aaaand Ian.
from comebacktome :
Hooray for notes! And hooray for you getting to fuck like mink again. I did love the thought of the rigged up mashed potato filled tonka truck though. I think New Wifey should patent that thing ;)
from misfitstray :
Sorry for your car breakdown. That's a nightmare of me too. But I'm member of an automobile club and they will tow me anywhere any time without complaints. ;) -4F is -20C. That is way colder than we had! Tough conditions! Hope you made it to work with the Escade. Take care!
from jimbostaxi :
Sorry to read about your car breaking down that sucks in the cold. I added emergency road service to my auto insurance during the last really cold spell. It was and extra 40$ bucks a year which is ok by me because I was tired of those long walks home in the freezing cold.
from dogsdontpurr :
I totally owe you an email, but first: do you not have AAA or Auto Club where you are? It is so worth it if you ever need to get towed. Also, I always write my posts in notepad first, then post them. That way, if Diaryland eats the post, I still have a backup. ~Ok, enough lecturing. Soon I will send you a proper email...with less lecturing and more fun. Cheers!
from aryssa90 :
Yeah, Squidwards tentacles make my mind race with possibilities. Just gotta pray you don't get a krabby patty ifyaknowwhatimean
from raven72d :
The Omelet of Resolve is a brilliant image!
from aryssa90 :
notes! we have notes! I had so much to respond to you but for now all I have is-Notes! Also, yeah, spongebob really gets the ol' loins a going. Mus be all the watery wetness and, sponginess and my unwavering ability to ignore anything around me when orgasms are on the horizon.
from jarofporter :
notes are back!? Boss!
from annanotbob2 :
Hey, dangerfucker, the notes are back! Big hugs to you and the wifey xxx
from peggypenny :
I was surprise to read that you followed the driving laws as a kid. I did not. Been driving since 10, I was born tall. Ha ha
from nilliem :
Ahh...the joys of driving illegally. Or, sort of in your case. I? Was driving with permit while my (single parent, full-time chllege student, full-time floor nurse) mom was studying. I'd been driving for a couple of years at this point, and she just needed the 30 minutes of quiet. One puddle, and the '76 Gran Torino station wagon spun and ran the passenger corner down a classmate's driver side (he was moving too, so timing is...everything). Not going fast, no damage to mom's car...just $400 that she didn't have to pay for the repair. Not as heartbreaking as your tale, but I get the gist. Merry Happy if I don't remember later!!
from barefootruby :
He was OK. My parents had just gone on holiday so he had two weeks to get used to it. I, er, pranged the car before their plane had completed the 60 minute flight to the Channel Islands.
from integrating :
Chicks and tearjerkers.....gluttons for punishment, lol. If I even start thinking about that movie I start tearing up. I have to say to myself, stop thinking about it! I've seen The Notebook three times and everytime I cry like a baby!
from catsoul :
12/20/14....thanks for asking about the spagetti bake. Super lean hamburger, 3 lbs. I fry that up, put in a large bowl. 2 cans of diced tomatoes without any seasonings because of all my allegeries. 2 cans of tomato soup. Blend beef, tomatoes, and soup together. Then I prepare box of angel hair spagetti. Not to tender because you bake this at 350 degrees for an hour. I use margarine to coat the bottom and sides of my 9 by 13 inch glass pan. First layer cover with pasta, put over all the pasta the beef, tomatoe, soup mix, then whatever shredded cheese you want. Repeat, the pasta, beef mixture, then cheese. I place 12 toothpicks then cover with foil. Bake. I use mozzeralla and provolene cheese for one layer of the cheese, then I use a mixture of cheedar and colby. Remember we are big into cheeses in Wisconsin. Considering I don't use any spices in this dish, it is very tasty and pretty easy to digest. I eat only about a 2 by 2 inch piece at a time compared to what my husband eats. Oh he puts a dab of sour cream on his serving. You could spice it up if you want. Thanks again for asking. =^..^=
from barefootruby :
I crashed my dad's car when I was a similar age. Luckily it wasn't written off (US - totalled), and it wasn't a 1972 Triumph - it was some modern German crap
from amidstgrace :
Thank you for your kind words.
from jimbostaxi :
Food list sounds like a good idea once I see all the stuff on there I will definetly scare myself thin! I thank you sir for the encouragement. I may indeed shoot you off and email when the food danger is low but when the food danger is high you need to be ready! The Dangerspouse manor and radio station will both need to be equipped with red phones (at your expense of course) so when I'm on the line of the nearest fast food joint you can talk me down. On a more serious note hope you have a great holiday! :0)
from stepfordtart :
Mmmmmmmmmmmmm, English Regional Coooooooooking *happy smiling face* :-)
from stepfordtart :
Who eats non free range???? Aaaaiiiiigghhh! A few years ago I wouldve eaten eggs from pretty much any source, however they had been produced but I had to teach a science class which included a film of battery hens and I havent eaten battery eggs since - Im not particularly squeamish but it was horrific. s x
from stepfordtart :
Obviously that story had me on the edge of my seat, and I felt every pang of your poor daddy's heart. What you also saw, that night, was Englishness at its finest. Making a giant great half-italian would have accomplished nothing. He just Dealt. With. It. I love your dad a little bit now. Now get cooking so you can come tell me about the TR6! s xx
from stepfordtart :
stop moaning about your egg prices: http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=260298456 :-( s x
from strawberrri :
My boob is okay I think! It hasn't bothered me in the last month or so. Wedding plans are coming along - we're going to get married in Hertford Castle in (funnily enough) Hertford, Hertfordshire. But not 'til 2016, so maybe that's when I'll next update! I'm glad your dad forgave you about the car. What an epic tale :)
from newschick :
love this entry! you've a knack for the ole storytellin. enjoy the car. and please dear god do not wreck it.
from misfitstray :
well, he's not naked in that movie - thank God! But when he went out of a house somewhere near the end you can claerly see his boobs (non-muscular) and his belly. But the movie is not that bad.
from newschick :
i should have prefaced the entry that i had JUST had my first ankle surgery... i was swimming with practically an open wound. my coach was a fucking nutjob!
from newschick :
i know...it actually makes me GAG. and this was only the beginning... i can't read more than one at a time before going 'oh shut the f*ck up you immature little twat!' at least there's a good ending to the whine period of my life!
from jimbostaxi :
The one with the sunglasses of course! :0)
from eloira :
Also so sorry to her about Casey - we lost our pup this time of year in 2012, and our cat not long after - they were totally (almost) inseparable. Never easy to lose a member of the family, no matter the species... Hoping you all heal soon.
from eloira :
With my fine head of mermaid hair, I think growing and dying the underarms would be pushing fashion way too far for this part of the world - plus, who could I show it off to at this chilly time of year? However, this house is freezing and turning into a yeti is not beyond possibility right now...
from misfitstray :
Thank you for kicking my ass! It would work even better if you did it in person ;)
from cdghost :
80n7
from whystinger :
Sorry to be late, but I have been off and distracted... I am sorry to hear of the death of your family member. Our pets are members of our families and they are an integral part of this family. We take care of them and they give us unconditional love. They watch us and watch over us and they know us. They grieve when we are ill and grieve when either we pass or another member of the family passes away or leaves. I understand your feelings for the Corgi - I had a few dogs and we had a few cats. My dogs passed away years ago and the cats were more recent. Remember the good times and take heart that you will always remember them. I still remember my dog that died when I was in 4th grade.
from life-my-way :
My diary credentials are top-secret, but for you I make an exception. Try its and mylilfe and see what happens. If you're wise, and lord knows that you are, you'll go back in time (to the beginning) when I was younger and had more witty things to say (possibly as many as three, if I recall correctly). XO K.
from comebacktome :
My condolences for your dog. And I don't think that you're weird for being more distraught about that than a human being. Pets are 99% of the time better than actual people *nods sagely*
from alethia :
Hahaha. To be fair, I'm here to meet the cruise ship. My soul belongs to the mouse, now. O_O
from cdghost :
nova, no go
from cdghost :
solar flecks
from cdghost :
anger d
from narcissa :
oh thanks! i do feel pretty lucky with all the rando stories i get to encounter through work. If your dad likes travel stories, this is one of my favorites: http://www.esquire.com/features/travel/ESQ0906KHAT_182
from peggypenny :
Could you please tell me a happy memory of Casey?
from newschick :
awww my corgus was red and white too...the best! RIP casey and snuggles :)
from catsoul :
12/10/14....I get all weepy when I read that a person's family pet member passed. Casey will be so missed. His sad little fur buddy is gone. When Katie passed, who was Sadie's little pal, it got so sad and bad that we adopted a little rescue doggie for Sadie and us. Best, the best decision we ever did. Now over the years they are boyfriend and girlfriend. Taffy the cat is also included. When they sit all together it reminds me so much of "The Incredible Journey" trio. I also feel what your wife is going thru. I also don't get out much and I talk to them all the time. So all said, as time passes you may think about getting another fur buddy family member. Take Care. =^..^=
from life-my-way :
Much sympathy on the loss of Casey. Also, on the sadness of watching Gloria the Liquid Cat look for her missing friend. My late German Shepherd did that when our Schnauzer died many years ago. Around in a circuit, around and around, all 80 sad pounds of him, looking and looking. The most pitiful thing ever is what it was. In happier news, your Bacchanalian Xmas tree is amazing. XOXO
from misfitstray :
Thank you for that tip on nuzzle! I liked it better with the "u". I even had to look up the word for "Einspritzduese" (jet nozzle) and I would swear it said nuzzle. There are things you think, that are just wrong.... Hope you are feeling a bit better. (((0))) Big hug!
from aryssa90 :
Not a problem. Realized i put I'm hear for you instead of here for you. How embarrassing. Hope you're doing well though, you.
from stepfordtart :
I dont really 'do' pets so I cant get much of a handle on how youre feeling but Im really sorry that your dog died cos I know he was important to you. And Im sad that youre sad cos youre a nice guy and I can tell youre in pain. Here, have a cyber-(((hug))), I aint got nuthin else. s x
from newschick :
very sorry for your loss. unfortunately i had a similar story 2 weeks ago when we put down our little jack russell. :( it's tough, but just remember the good times and all the fun you guys had together. :)
from integrating :
So very sorry for your loss. <3
from rockhound :
I'm sorry Casey's gone. Not going to joke, not going to rib you this time. Misery is misery and platitudes and joking don't cut it.
from alethia :
Sorry I...kinda...lost track of what we were talking about halfway through your note there. Mmmm...(You forgot the spectacular dad moustache. Could also be a cop moustache. Moustaches are how you know he's a REAL man.)
from papotheclown :
I was offered a better paying job. I'll write about it on here in the next day or so.
from nilliem :
So sorry honey. Strength and peace to both of you.
from alethia :
Action Jackson. It's amazing. Waaaatch it. It doesn't make much sense, though, so I suggest drinking at the same time. Drink when ever a grown man bitchslaps another grown man, or someone's shirt rips off. It's directed (and written) by India's Michael Jackson.
from peggypenny :
Memories are divine and sacred. Don't waste or allow grief to change them.
from jarofporter :
cats, plural...
from jarofporter :
well, i really do understand. i miss my cat terribly, but in the 5 years since they've been gone, i haven't been willing/able to get new ones, for the same reason - can't go through losing them again. i was with my girl kitty at the end, petting her the whole time they were putting her to sleep. broke my little stone heart. my thoughts are with ya...
from pandionna :
Oh, man, so sorry to hear. Losing a beloved pet is so heart-wrenchingly difficult. Gentle hugs to you and NewWifey(tm).
from alethia :
I'm so sorry to hear this. My only suggestion is more wine.
from misfitstray :
I'm so very sorry for your loss! I had to go through exactly the same on March 17th, 2008. We'll never forget those absolutely lovely, never ending love-giving furry friends. I had to cry, when I read your entry and even cry a little more when I think now of my Tula. It's so embarrassing as I'm sitting at my desk at work. Damn!
from aryssa90 :
i am so sorry to hear that. they do love us in a way that humans dont know how to love and it hurts so bad to have them leave. im hear if you need to chat or stare catatonically at the screen or try to get drunk. it shows a lot about your character and what a wonderful fur dad you were.
from jarofporter :
sorry to hear, been through it myself with my two cats. hang in there, man...
from narcissa :
oh i'm sorry.. it's the worst. And it's so hard when you don't get to say goodbye to them.
from cocoabean :
I'm so sorry... xoxoxox
from annanotbob2 :
xxxxxxxxx
from rockhound :
I'm glad you have the roll in the crumbs, and hope that Casey holds out a little longer. It'd be mighty selfish of him to keel over for Christmas.
from alethia :
I'm tired of being alone, though. It's a big scary world, and it would be nice to have someone to fight the monsters under the bed with. (Though you're right: I would totally jump out the window. It just kinda sucks.)
from stepfordtart :
Might have to take you up on that one of these days - I love a good gunnel stuffing.
from stepfordtart :
Haha! I have been similarly 'inconvenienced' by guests who dont appreciate how people with no children in the house for protracted periods of time like to behave. Oh, and my leftovers are fucking awesome, ACK-CHEW-LY. Sometimes theyre so awesome I make something new for unexpected guests, just so I can eat the saved leftovers after theyve gone instead of wasting them on their sorry tardy-arses. s x
from peggypenny :
Hey, how can you be American and not have made turkey tacos?
from alethia :
I'm reasonably sure. He's also really emotionally needy, and has no ambition. Part of relationships is definitely reassuring one's partner, but I can't be doing it every damned day. And every time I do, he clings tighter, or if I don't, he goes into a spiralling sulk which sends him to bed for (I'm not kidding) 24 hours.
from peggypenny :
Dang, I left myself a note and it won't delete. How dumb am I blond? I'm so lucky, my guests show up with extra guests. How come I didn't see turkey tacos on your left over list?
from peggypenny :
Another "liability" guy!
from peggypenny :
Danger! I need you. Your soft wit and your heart of Gold.
from integrating :
You said whore...huh huh huh (Thanks for the add)
from cocoabean :
So sorry to hear Casey the Wonder Corgi is not doing well..
from newschick :
NINE INCHES!!? We got maybe 1. so you get to drive by the GLORIOUS xanadu on your commute? lucky you! i get to experience the lovely newark bay extension traffic nightmare at the toll booth every morning. Ah, bliss.
from peace4allboy :
No more D/L means no more (Downloading) junk on my computer from itunes/amazon, etc! My hard drive has been about 95% full for awhile now and most of the books/music/movies I downloaded I don't utilize and then I have a habit of wanting more and having to delete stuff to make room for it or buying flash drives etc. to make room! It's an expensive habit! I can see why you thought it meant "no more Diaryland!" It does appear that way! haha...but after well over a decade on diaryland, I don't think I can live without it! Even though I did try to leave D/L twice but didn't last more than a week! haha
from stepfordtart :
Balls! Saw the invite too damn late or I totes wouldve been there, a'scoffin your food. Mind you, 'Thanksgiving' is just know as 'Thursday' round these parts so I might've had a bit of trouble getting the day off. What do y'all eat at Christmas? Because we dont have Thanksgiving our 'eat until you have apoplexy' day = baby Jeebus day so Im interested to know if you stuff yourselves to the gunnels TWICE in the space of a month or whether Christmas is a more frugal affair. s x
from peggypenny :
Ha I had prime rib, it was wonderful. I'll try this little hint about my name again. Peggy Peggy
from glorycloud :
Thank you for the nice Thanksgiving note-I do not know why you think I do not like you-have a good weekend-peace Jonny
from aryssa90 :
You poor man. I hope some of the guests ended up coming, I might have risked death for a Dangerspouse feast. Also, I got drunk and had a frozen burrito for my thanksgiving. Happy holidays!
from catsoul :
For god's sake....I have a snow blower and a 4 wheeler with a plow. I just like to shovel. It gets me outside and I don't have to do the elliptical trainer inside. I also snowrake and among other things. =^..^=
from integrating :
Thank you for the note!
from alethia :
If my dreamed-of adventure of driving across the US ever comes to pass, I am landing on your doorstep at Thanksgiving. No matter I don't know where you live, I'll make an educated guess and start knocking on doors. Can't be THAT hard...
from misfitstray :
Aaaww! Thank you! ♥ As I don't celbrate Christmas it would be a waste if you'd send a card. But nevertheless it's lovely of you. And my knee is getting better. It's turning greenish-yellow now. I'm all for multi-color.
from misfitstray :
I would definitely fly over just to see all that food you made! Plus I would like to see you and your wife doing those nasty things under the table... Well, I'm broke, no money left from buying a car. Damn! I've never been to a Thanksgiving Dinner as they don't celebrate such a thing over here.
from dogsdontpurr :
Happy Thanksgiving DangerGuy!! Maybe you could pack some of the leftovers into a cooler filled with some of that snow and overnight it to me in Los Angeles. (Hmmm...it would have to be a super insulated cooler though. It's about 78 degrees here right now at 7pm. Ha!) Cheers my friend! Hope you have a really fabulous time...even though we can't be there. XxxOoo
from nilliem :
This is the first year in MANY that I have to cook. If I could...I'd drag the whole fam-damily just for the ride. Heh. That chestnut soup would be worth the whining.
from newschick :
Yeah...you may be in rural Jersey, but i bet you have SPACE. we schmucks who have to be on train lines to newark (god) live in tiny alcoves masked as houses. if i open my fridge, i've got about 4 inches space between the door and the stove. it's very, very depressing. but now that we have AC, a non-yellow paint job, and actually decent interior decor, I bet we'll get our $ back on this silly suburban investment. until then, i bitch.
from nacht-katze :
I wasn't exactly expected micro-brewed quality; I guess I was just giving it a second chance. We have quite a bit of local breweries around here, so I'll probably just stick with those from now on.
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks for the note and the encouragement! :0) I looked up that info and im going start mixing in a little protein to curb the hunger.
from sevenmagpies :
Yeah, I like your explanation much better. Let's roll with that :-D.
from sevenmagpies :
You know, I would love to say it was, but I'm so not that cool. It was probably subliminal. Kitten - Cat - Catalyst. I'm the person adverts are made for - and those pesky last minute purchase aisles right next to the checkouts!
from raven72d :
Thank you! Glad to have pointed you to some good music!
from comebacktome :
My thanks for the note. And yes, he has seen that side. I was super crabby with him last week (he was being sweet, I was being a harpy) and I recognised this and apologised the next day. Apparently he didn't even notice. This concerned me a little bit. I did laugh at your simple creatures comment. Usually I would agree with you, but this one is weird, because I have no idea if it would be welcomed, or cause for a restraining order. That's the problem when someone is too damn nice and passive an accommodating. Sigh. And anime is awesome. Ghost in the Shell is still my fave and Neon Genesis Evangelion for TV series. I shall look up those you have discussed though...
from stepfordtart :
My boobs make that noise when you squish 'em, too. s x
from sevenmagpies :
Ah ha. Thank you :-) Diaryland does not like to tell me when someone has left a note. P.s: That Strike Witches video was equal parts cheesy and weird, but it did make me laugh.
from misfitstray :
I'm so embarrassed about loving and loughing.... Damn! But thanks for the anime-tips, I'll look it up ♥
from misfitstray :
Thank you for adding me as well! I'm speechless that I didn't discover you earlier as it is so worth every word to read. I loved so hard about the masturbating thing. Very nice. Is there anime with male porn as well?
from peggypenny :
I just bought a new car. I was amazed that it is cheaper payments then my used car, which I traded in for 5,000 more then I could sell it. If you have good credit, you might consider this option. Right now, dealers selling cheap to make way for 1015 new cars. They advertise one car super cheap, you go right away and get that one. That is what I did. Peggy Peggy
from misfitstray :
Thank you :) Found one. I hope that it will be as good inside as it looks outside.
from her-story :
oh lordy... lol
from peggypenny :
Fantastic jokes, giggles. Peggy
from portlypete :
<i>"The Republicans have control of the house and senate."</i> Let's hope you're still laughing in a couple of years.
from barefootruby :
you've done that first joke before!
from papotheclown :
Thank you, ser blowhard. Your advice is sound and much needed. A lot of my issue is that I actually do have some actual mental illness (�ber depression and anxiety, etc), so that does hamper things a bit. Still though, it's good to be reminded to step back and look at the big picture some.
from raven72d :
Excellent. I was afraid they spent their days in front of screens, trading wines and futures just as numbers, with no idea what it was like to actually see wines made...or even taste them.
from jimbostaxi :
Murder suicide up there what a mess. I don't get up there that much except for occasionally dropping people at the Pt Jeff Ferry. I've never had a week off from work in my life so this vacation thing is new to me(i know its hard to believe). I need to enjoy life while I have this week free :0)
from peace4allboy :
Sounds good! ;0 Thanks for the advice! I sure will follow!
from peace4allboy :
Thanks for the 'luck' mate. And yes, I'll take advice if you have some! As long as it's not commit myself to psycho therapy! haha ;)
from alethia :
Sobered up? WTF IS THAT?! (I am having an evening gin, myself.) As for flowers, I am on day 11, and we are up to 13,100 4mm flowers (of 24,000). Ergo, the gin. So...much...gin...
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks for the note on the new pic ;0) I've heard that pussy syndrome is contagious and the first sign is the uncontrollable urge to drive a a Subaru. :0)
from jimbostaxi :
LMAO! Maybe Ill look for a pic thats not so pussyish.
from peggypenny :
that's 5 sweet Italian sausages. sorry.
from peggypenny :
3 day spaghetti sauce crock pot recipe I'm making it now. Put in Crock Pot: 4 cans hunt's traditional sauce 1 cubed apple 2 large carrot 2 tablespoons purple onion 1 tablespoon powder garlic 1 tablespoon celery salt 1 cup red wine Put above ingr. in crock pot at highest temperature, cover and heat the sauce to boil. Meanwhile, in medium bowl: 1 lb quality hamburger 2 eggs 3/4 cup bread crumbs 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/2 Tablespoon Italian Herbs to taste Roll into small meat balls and drop into boiling sauce. Be sure sauce covers all meatballs and cover the crock pot, turn heat to lowest level. (notice I do not brown the meatballs, you will find them more tender this way. They do not fall apart because you have the sauce very hot and it seals the meatballs.) Brown 5 sweet Italian sauces with 1/2 slice green pepper and 1/4 sliced white onion. Cut sausage into chucks, throw into the sauce. Next morning, gently stir. Next morning, gently stir. Next morning scrap sides and bottom and stir. Serve third night on pasta with garlic bread and Parisian cheese and a simple green salad.
from peggypenny :
Darn, I was hoping it was a trophy.
from peggypenny :
Halloween Joke:<p>I had to<p>bludgeon<p><p> a fly.<p><p><p>Dinner Tonight. Pegsters
from cdghost :
Z
from msafire :
I have now checked this page and two or three times have witnessed the evidence of why New Wifey claimed ignorance of cooking for so long. WISE WOMAN!! WOW that looks amazing.
from peggypenny :
Excellent notes, I used canned milk to reduce fat. Mistake. I don't know what is that cooking contraption. I'm a cookie, not chef. Ha Revising and will get back to you.
from realchild :
hahahaaa no punch line
from phaythles :
Thanks for the note! Hes better now. Thank goodness! *hugs*
from cdghost :
M
from kelsi :
Bicycle. Just got it tunes up and it's like new.
from whystinger :
Yep, Bully Hill. Old Ace #45 was the best Rose they had. I love the "My Goat" wines too but maybe outgrew them. Walt was in the Taylor family and I think the family sold the winery and he broke off and started the "other Taylor wines," was sued by corporate and the rest is history. Walter S. XXXXXX did his own label artwork, then he was in a bad accident and is wheelchair bound. I think he paints still, but there were some big changes. I have found that my wine tastes have changed over the years. First white and sweet, then branched out, rose hated Merlot and such. More rose and white and a few "table reds" (sweeter) then came the Merlot, Pinot Noir and Shiraz...
from cdghost :
it
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks daddy-o for bringing me up to speed. :0)
from peggypenny :
I enjoyed the car escape story featuring your wife. Pegsters
from jimbostaxi :
Hey, thanks for the note! I don't want to sob all over your page talking about my feelings but i do have one question on your Weaker Sex entry what type of porn are we talking about Playboy or Hustler?:0)
from whystinger :
That serene terrine looks awesome
from cdghost :
spoon
from peggypenny :
Danger, this doesn't sound right. It comes out hot and sweetly creamed. You wife is awfully understanding. Kansas Corn, everyone. We are chatting about Kansas Corn. Scheeks.
from kelsi :
Thanks for the reassurance about the attacks. You never know, you know? It would be the worst if someone hijacked my account here.
from peggypenny :
the crust recipe I use is super easy and successful without drinking vodka. You use the beaters and with Crisco with hot water first. Then fold in the flour. It rolls like a rug.
from nacht-katze :
Wait, yams are not sweet potatoes?! I've grown up thinking the two are interchangeable (I'm serious). How disappointing.
from peggypenny :
A life size welch corgi is what makes the pie. I love this idea. I am gong to see if I can think of how to expand on the idea too. I just finished making 6 pies. I made up a 'Kansas Corn' recipe. It makes a cream corn on the cob in your crock pot. Just a sweet cream sauce with nutmeg, put the fresh corn husked and cut in half and cook until corn is done. Serve with sauce.
from stepfordtart :
Ours look positively HEALTHY compared to yours (I googled!) - see http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=261533102 . Still looks like a ginormous pile o shite tho. s x
from stepfordtart :
Does look pretty good. Fine work, old pip. s x ps Lunchables are the work of the devil. People (I mean actual real people, not stoners or the terminally dense) dont actually eat those, do they?
from nacht-katze :
You know, I'm not sure why I responded in my own notes. I haven't left a note for anyone on here in ages, and think I've gotten a little too used to alternative forms of social media. Thanks for the reminder! :) I've always used canned pumpkin for my muffins, but am intrigued by the idea of using butternut squash (I've also thought of yams, although I've never been so bold).
from peggypenny :
What is that wonderful looking thing you made? Does it taste as fantastic as it looks? My Mom loved your joke with no punch line. Who are these people? Here are my pies http://perfectpies.homestead.com/1.html
from invisibledon :
It can have a place still doesn't mean I have to like it
from jaysthoughts :
What makes some usernames like yours bold in the public entry list?
from jaysthoughts :
According to my research, you are one of the most active people on Diaryland!
from jaysthoughts :
Just checking to see how many diarylanders still actually check their notes and stay active.
from barefootruby :
As a British English speaker it works better if I write it than read it - otherwise people would think "duh, why is he saying 'line' instead of 'queue'?" and completely miss the punch line (which isn't there anyway)
from aryssa90 :
ba da bum. thanks for the logical advice by the way. i was never very good at math though
from msafire :
Hey thanks for giving me the update on the rules of leaving notes on THE PERSon's page you want to see it! Of course that seems obvious, but I always somehow just have trouble following those social norms (mainly cause I am so rarely AWARE of them!)
from peggypenny :
I am so not joking. Got an e mail from my Bank, deposit and withdraw attempts in my "bill pay" section. I have never used my "bill pay." I withdrew most funds. It is in the news that credit unions are being targeted and hacked. I am just one of the many. Please check news for yourself. Be careful. Peggy
from barefootruby :
That joke is so bad it's good. I'm nicking it
from alethia :
IT'S SO TRUUUUUUE! *boohoohoohoooooooooooo* *chugs gin*
from stepfordtart :
Ha!
from peggypenny :
bye
from peggypenny :
Dad had to come over and read your joke too. It's a party over your punch joke. haha
from peggypenny :
Hey, I write jokes with no punch line, that is my gig! Made me laugh out loud.
from peggypenny :
Trouble maker. They are nothing like Taco Bell's horrid empanadas. They are spiced potatoes in a crust. Does that sound like you would like the recipe?
from peggypenny :
Yes, I will type up that recipe translated. Do you speak any other languages?
from peggypenny :
It's 5am, been up since 4am. Yes, I am always alone, different. My field of study Sociology. Social systems. I add that to assure you do not think it means I am a Socialist. I am conservative. Isn't that a hoot? 2 days to 9/11 Our country has not seen war at home. We like to sit and hold hands singing Cumbye yaw and talking happy about free and sharing. I have traveled the world and seen hungry children for real, selling empanadas on the street and following me because I gave them a quarter.
from alethia :
Yeah, but I don't feel compelled to drink the whole bottle of gin once I've opened it...
from peggypenny :
crap, it's already changed. I'm sorry.
from peggypenny :
once on stats, left side click on location and number 5 isp 191... This is no joke.
from peggypenny :
just above "my profile" on my diary.
from peggypenny :
stats open, click on little green square bottom right my site, isp starts with 191... Go ahead and put isp into google.
from alethia :
Ah, I wish I had the budget to be a wine snob! As it is, I just have to be a gin snob. ;) Though I have been informed that I arrived in London in the middle of a gin renaissance. :D
from whystinger :
Bravo for the wine! I split a case of a NY State wine, my (at the time) absofuckinglutely favorite wine, Bully Hill. From the Finger Lakes region. The red had turned brown and there was sediment forming... I am not a (love the spelling) wineaux, but like wine. I loved Bully Hill's "Old Ace 45" Rose. I was out of the Old Ace, but have a few bottles of table red and table white. The red was drinkable, but had a funk to it and I ended up dumping it. It had the musty stuff going on and was not real pleasant. I should open up the white and see...
from peggypenny :
Yes. The Russian Federation has been monitoring my internet activities and mole since Aug. 2014. "The Russians are cracking/mole into systems to scramble data of USA citizens for the purpose of suddenly planned 'accident on purpose' attack of scrambling data. To level monetary systems, use for racist genealogy, scramble to kill health records, stop travel and communications. Our citizens fall right into their hands being liberal and "it's nice to be 'free" robots, they free share/give any all their information data.
from cdghost :
danger ous
from peggypenny :
I appreciate your response very much. I have already run away from home. I do not know when I will be back.
from msafire :
"The Weaker Sex" is best post yet!!! It was very encouraging as I cursed and fumed while trying to fix a stupid door thing- weather stipping molding, which I found in the corner. The guy friend of mine who bought it for me couldn't get it on- so I was compelled to give it a go tonight when I came across it. Figures, not only could I NOT get it on either, but now I can't get the other one I removed in the trying to get back on... Sheesh... At least reading this I was reminded a man around wouldn't NECESSARILY mean ANY greater likelihood of success in fixing this thing.
from peggypenny :
Who do I talk to when my heart is so broken? DangerSpouse Why does he play these terrible head games with me? Tell me, Oh DangerMan, tell me, sobbing, please. (sniff) I just can't "grasp" that the guy is "a #$%^&*()_+" I just can't understand that concept. I'm such a girl. Peggy
from whystinger :
Yes, my fault totally! One of my faults is I generally have a very good memory - I remember all the unimportant shit and forget the important crap. I was at Chateau Hathorn last in 1995 or 1996. I left Vernon in 1993. Before I had left, Chateau Hathorn at one time was a restaurant (if I remember correctly) and it closed down for a while, then was the B&B. I loved the way it looked from the road. When inside, it looked nice, but you could tell it needed attention and that was a long time ago!
from lust- :
Hah. It was more than the booze floats that got her that way. But you are very right, what's done is done...may as well have some more, yes?
from narcissa :
hotttttttt (your wife)
from jessie-doll :
thank you! it's good to be back :-)
from astitchaway :
Alright, I will avoid turning to panic as a method of coping with your disappearance. But should you not return, I will send the search party out. I will describe you as an interesting character who may or may not be a tormented writer.
from astitchaway :
Or maybe it's that I only know extremely tormented people who also happen to be good writers. I guess it's fair to say I can't make assumptions about the rest of the world of writers based on my own personal experiences with them. But hey, it's human nature to make assumptions, isn't it? It's all a game of statistics anyway. I'm sure at least %35.6 of writers are tormented. Or maybe I just made that statistic up. Oh alright, you caught me. I know lots of writers who aren't tormented, I just don't happen to be one of them. So stranger, now that you have bested me and know my secret, where do we go from here?
from the-grey-one :
diversions will be engaged in, and i am believing this will help. good advice.
from whystinger :
I lived in the Vernon/Hamburg, NJ area. I used to take Rt 23 to 46 to my area... I remember the Ford and Chevy dealer in Warwick... What was his name? Silvio Petrucci maybe? Hey, what is the name of that old mansion in Warwick that was a restaurant, then a bed and breakfast? Yep, that was my old stomping grounds. Had trouble with the Warwick Popo with my old hot rod truck...
from peggypenny :
I warned my bank, they confirmed and put on their site. I warned every news I could. I sound crazy, no one cares. Now "R's" hack investment corps. I tell news people again. Not to worry. I too often know things ahead of time. I should have been a reporter. If you cannot understand, [email protected]
from whystinger :
Fette? In Clifton? Shit, I remember them. I need to come up for a visit to my old neighborhood in NJ sometime... I actually miss the place. That said, that is NO place to hold up traffic.... Yikes! Your wife rocks, should have went with the coil first, easier to get at at most times...
from realchild :
I love your wife.
from jimbostaxi :
Awesome note ty! :0)
from alethia :
Heh. I like your wife. My kinda woman.
from peggypenny :
S%@#%, What I wouldn't give for a male buddy right now. What is this guy doing to me? Arrgggg
from peggypenny :
Did you see on the network news that the russians hacked Morgan large corporations USA? I did try to tell everyone this two months ago. I have all the hard copy evidence. Yes, me, your little friend.
from peggypenny :
I was bit by a brown recluse. I was suppose to die, but alas, here I still am.
from peggypenny :
gee, you are welcome. Let me know when you want my clam chowder/shrimp or lobster bisque recipe. Easy one pan, little mess.
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks for the note :o) we jacked up our trailer and put inflatable rafts under it. The only problem is that now that the flood waters have receded our trailer has landed it some guys front yard.
from jimbostaxi :
Yep
from aryssa90 :
Ugh, stupid note format. I hope you got the intended haiku gold I posted there.
from aryssa90 :
thanks for the comment. i hope your spider bite hurts. Not really, j.k. See what I did there? :p
from peggypenny :
Yes, you are clever. That is why I am here.
from realchild :
HORNETS SO MUCH NOPE.
from barefootruby :
A couple of years ago I was teaching a first aid course and when we covered objects stuck in the ear I emphasised how we don't prod or poke to try to get the object out. That evening a friend posted on farcebook how she had had a trip to the ER after the cotton wool from a q-tip got stuck in her bf's ear. So that gave a useful example for the revision session the following morning.
from barefootruby :
Before I started laughing at your pest control attempt I was reminded how a female friend told me about a chlamydia test she had had. "It required having a q-tip inserted into somewhere a q-tip shouldn't be". I assumed that she meant her ear, as everyone knows that q-tips shouldn't be inserted into your ear.
from aryssa90 :
I was the least slacker-y slacker there. I was bright eyed and bushy tailed! Luckily, it was a dreary day and I could blame the yawns on that.
from aryssa90 :
I expect to be called awesome, generally through the moans, with a few gasps thrown in there for good measure. Being demure has its uses as well ;)
from whystinger :
Dude, what a fucking nightmare! I hate Hornets and Yellow Jackets (Wasps) but seem to have to deal with them, but not like that! I am surprised that you hid that from the wife. Hell, I would have my wife in the know just in case... If the nest weren't too big, I would have emptied a can into the hole and plugged it. I have learned that Hornets WILL fly in the dark, especially if you have a light there. Maybe a pest control service would have been better. Sure is ironic and sucks that you have been bitten by a Brown Recluse...
from aryssa90 :
Listen mister, I trusted you to keep reading and not call me a ho ho ho ;)
from stepfordtart :
#4 Yes, it was a bit grim and has made me creeped out by cliffs ever since. #5 I dunno. I really dont. Its fucking horrible and I hope it will pass. s x PS L would have reacted in EXACTLY the same 'dont want to shrink penis' kind of way. Men are strange creatures fersure.
from stepfordtart :
Ha! What a fucking nightmare! I cant work out why Im so amused that you had to 'hide the evidence' from New Wifey. Thats man-logic right there. Why not..err../tell/ her what happened? Would she be mad? You think she would have wanted to KEEP the hornets? s x
from aryssa90 :
Everything I ever do or say is deliberate! Not really. I'm just such a pun master that I make them without even realizing. Though, I've never gotten any "input" from someone on d-land. Sorry about the recluse! The hornets had their revenge it seems...delicious, bee-autiful irony.
from peggypenny :
If ears have no wax, too clean, can cause ring.
from peggypenny :
NO !!! Bad Bad.
from peggypenny :
Huh. Still have no muse or help. I said, "It sounds like two guys that need a woman's product to plug their bloody holes."
from peggypenny :
I use my diary to leave messages on private server by locking and receipt has password, then I remove entry. I build web sites. Please tell me site to hear your voice. Curious.
from alethia :
Right?! My mother has this excellent (and very real) ad for this 'new simplified car!' from the 50's. 'Now so simple, even a woman can drive it!' She keeps it on the fridge next to the ads for spam.
from cdghost :
dito
from cdghost :
unknown at moment.
from aryssa90 :
I see I was lured into a trap. I'm onto you sir...*peers suspiciously*
from aryssa90 :
And I was *trying* to practice a little self-avoidance ;) But don't worry, I'm back on track now Mr. Vitamix
from aryssa90 :
listen up mister, not every moment in my life can be full of orgasmic naughtiness, unfortunately. Sometimes the mundane trivialities of everyday life seep their way into my diary!
from realchild :
haha the pain of being educated some more. I lol'd.
from realchild :
You've sussed it out. I don't really want to go back, but I have to. Congrats on the Vitamix.
from peggypenny :
'LIVE TV on Bush/Gore.' while I was donating blood 'live' for the county blood drive. Guess what I said...
from aryssa90 :
Hey yeah, no way will I be discussing this in any way shape or form with him. Is it wrong that I'm hoping he'll eventually just give in the the open relationship and then I can pretend there was no grey area? I've been going back and forth all day but *shrugs* Right now, not exactly sure if it was worth it but...it was fucking awesome. Shoot me an email at [email protected] for the username info.
from peggypenny :
Ouch. I am glad you did not say that on air. His family is in mourning, it would be cruel and the audience would turn on you. Where may I hear your broadcast? [email protected]
from peggypenny :
I have the domain name "In Can Man" dot com guy ran off ...
from linguafranca :
Yeah, too soon. It's good, but...no.
from stepfordtart :
Straight to hell for you. Do not pass the naughty step, do not collect a good spanking. ;-) s x
from aryssa90 :
Not taking someone up on the offer of sex whenever possible is a pretty foreign idea to me as well. *shrugs* I would like to have at least A ride, let alone a better one, so long as I get to keep my husb around too, I'm kinda fond of him. Oh and nanu nanoose...*shaking my head* now that's just wicked ;)
from whystinger :
;-D
from alethia :
I revel in your jealousy. :D
from whystinger :
GIngerLynn from the movies I'll wager...
from alethia :
I found an old Cuisinart 11 cup food processor at a thrift store last week (with all the attachments, I should point out). The power of the motor is enough to slightly alter the rotation of the earth. It's amaaaazing.
from aryssa90 :
I'm not exactly sure how a person like me would end up with the one guy in the entire world who would not take advantage of a young, sexually inquisitive girl like myself. Life is cruel sometimes...I need a guys opinion on this whole thing. Is there really a huge different between hooking up with a girl that he doesn't want to watch or even know about but that he says it's ok, and a guy who he wouldn't watch or know about? I mean, I just don't really get that. Trying not to be too flirty with your last comment :p
from aryssa90 :
Your boob encounter of the third kind seems hilariously traumatizing. I'm sorry I didn't see your note earlier, diaryland has this agenda to make me feel unloved by not notifying me if I have a note. Alas, I did not get it. Greedy, greedy indeed. And the job well, that's still being determined but they've called my references so...
from realchild :
dude. Bitch Pudding. m/
from peggypenny :
Where is your radio broadcast? The mal ware due to url masking from godaddy.
from peggypenny :
Thank-you. Do not Google me, I am real. You are selling a domain name on your diary guest book link? Pegsters
from peggypenny :
I am horrified and stunned. Intuit is closed, but they will be hearing from me Monday. I don't understand how it is possible, but please know that I would never ever do that intentionally. I am a real person no scam. Peggy
from peggypenny :
Add to the wiki story if bored. wwww.WhoDunIt247.com New entry free: FREE New Character, NOT SO FREE New Who Dun It, NOT FREE Solve the Murder NOT FREE Gold Membership Peggy
from alethia :
You gotta work on your lascivious eyebrow waggle. You nail that down, and the world will be putty in your hands. Uncomfortable, uncomfortable putty.
from simeons-twin :
Indeed, thank you. I fixed it.
from alethia :
It's probably because I put my boob on his head.
from peggypenny :
Comedy Stream Bit: "My neighbor talks soo loud on her cell phone every morning, it's almost like having a girlfriend. (laugh laugh) Pain 10 = one day Pain 12 = two day recovery ...
from peggypenny :
I am disabled, sensory sensitive, fiber mayalsia. fingers wrist pain. over ouch.
from peggypenny :
I have thick skin and one must hold me down and practically beat me to get me to be serious. No worries. I hope you recover soon. You and shall laugh together at the humor of my laurels. Peggy
from whystinger :
Bitch Pudding? WTF! what great carnage! now I will watch it too.
from julymalaise :
Hahaha, the last part of your comment made me laugh! Lol!! I forgot Climax PA, yes, there is one in Pennsylvania. I wonder who named these towns and why and how they are coincidentally in the vicinity of one another. Oh, dirty Amish, I suppose, lol just kidding! But seriously, whoever named those towns was a little bit horny that day...
from alethia :
Ha! Flatterer. ;) But you never know...I could have haunted boobs of the damned, or boobs full of glass and angry bees. Evolution! How does it work?!
from alethia :
Right?! I'm quite unreasonable. In other news, glad to hear you're getting bullied by a giant boob. I bully people frequently with mine. Actually, I'm not to sure whether it's 'bully' or 'comfort'. I really just put a boob on their head. I call it Boob-on-the-Head. Sits there like a warm gelatinous hat. It's quite effective conversation stopper. Useful at family gatherings.
from jimbostaxi :
Come on YOUR REALLY PAYING Kirsten to play motorboat with those juicy jugs!!!! Im a Dangerspouse addict I CAN HANDLE THE TRUTH!! TELL ME NOW!! :0)
from jimbostaxi :
Italian Stallion Ham cappy, salami, pepperoni, provolone onion, lettuce, tomato, oil & vinegar on hero!!!!
from phaythles :
No worries. I was trying to be funny too. I do forget that without seeing my awesome facial expressions, the tone in my voice, and my arms going about in crazy motions because I talk with my hands, that it can be hard to pick up on my weird sense of gutter humor.
from her-story :
Stack cans at Shop Rite for the can-can sale. I'm sure the only lawsuit you'd get is if you dropped them on a lawyer.
from peggypenny :
Wow. I got busy. Came back, read your new notes and became very frightened. I guess I am too boring for you to converse.
from her-story :
Wait. What did I miss? Cast? Surgery? Marred vocal cords? Damn man, you just can't simply live like a normal person. If you'd move to the other dark side, I'd actually get the updates that you posted WHEN you posted. (I know, I know... loyalty to DL. I still have my diary here, but rarely log in. Today, was a fluke.) Not like the fish.
from her-story :
And, that's why I don't speak French. One quarter in 8th grade proved to me and the ENTIRE class that I do not have the penchant for French. I'd probably suck more at Italian. I think angry languages are more my thing. I can say something in a totally angry voice and really ask for milk in my coffee. Gotta love it.
from phaythles :
As for Penn it hasnt come up as of yet when Ive been researching on where to get my masters in psych but Ill look into it.
from phaythles :
You said "agree to disagree". Im confused. What are we not in agreement about? I thought we were on the same page. Was it the burning vagina comments? I still stand firm that a hot vagina isnt desirable. Unless you like fire vag and thats just....weird. Was it the sock thing? I agreed that messing with a guys, ummm....tube sock? jock sock? cock sock? fun time tube? The Man Sock (this one gets a manly voice echo)?...was off limits. I could only imagine the sheer horror in coming home from wherever to discover the sacred and stiff Wacky Jacky has been violated by your mother who happened to bedazzle it. Its just 50 ways of fucked up. Was it because I reposted the poor guys misery and laughed to my amusement? Well I do apologize on behalf of my warped sense of humor.
from peggypenny :
I'm trying to read what happened to you to be in a cast and have terrible wrong things stuck down your throat. I laughed so much at your wife being a "dirty liar" regarding cooking. I just finished baking 3 sugarless blueberry & 1 raspberry pie. My father has diabetes. I'll post pictures to prove it, if necessary. haha
from narcissa :
you got your voice back and *that* is what you use it for?!?!
from peggypenny :
I am a vocalist. To help your voice, try this: do not drink anything hot or cold, room temp only. This will help prevent your vocal chords from having spasms, which can cause your voice to strain like you are describing.
from jimbostaxi :
Ty for the note about PAP, that sucks about your voice!!! Maybe a rival radio station paid the anesthesiologist to rough your vocal cords up a bit. You know how i love a good conspiracy plot! :0)
from shortst101 :
Hi stranger! Still making me smile by your entries. Hope you got your voice back! And that your arm is healing good. Sandy
from phaythles :
I had no idea what capsaicin cream was so I googled it and found this, �Temporary burning or stinging at the application site that usually disappears in a few days.� Also found its what makes peppers spicy. Made me giggle. Male socks are off limits. Not that I wanted to glue googly eyes on one, but its nice to know where the line is drawn. I prefer my vagina to be burn free.
from peggypenny :
I am delighted you found the humor. Peggy
from peggypenny :
Si prega il bagno Please where is the bathroom? Yes, pregnant the bano, bathroom bathroom ill ill sick bano bathroom. What is bathroom in Italian? Bano Where is the bano? Si prega il bagno Si prega il bagno Si prega il bagno (Print this and read twelve times) Breath keep good pace and consentration. There. Done. You are welcome. hahah
from stepfordtart :
Yeh, thats always been a thorny issue. As long as your pissed is 'off' it still counts as angry, but once your pissed becomes 'up', then youre drunk. If your pissed is 'about' or 'around' then youve been misled in some way or you may just have wasted a lot of time. Pissed is a complicated colloquialism, fersure. s x
from narcissa :
oh i should be safe from the rebels. The worst thing i'll have to deal with is rainy season traffic (my job only *sounds* exciting). Good luck with the steroids+silence. I'm trying to imagine how things would go around here if i couldn't talk for a week..possibly BT's dream come true.
from stepfordtart :
Cheeky! Actually, he's not bad looking, in a 'rustic sheep-shagger' sort of way. And he does have particularly substantial and muscular fingers. Glad my misfortune cheered your day - I also have a video of me almost totalling my car, waiting to be uploaded. You'll probably pee your pants with glee at that one. ;-) s x
from jarofporter :
toque, eh? "take off, hoser!" http://oyster.ignimgs.com/wordpress/my.stg.ign.com/69/2010/09/1222albums045.jpg
from stepfordtart :
WoopWoop on being bi-armed again (disturbing kiddie-wank imagery notwithstanding, of course), but the voice thing sounds crappy. Maybe sucking on something slippery might help? s x
from jarofporter :
doppelbock is still on - yous internet peoples are exempt from my rants! feeling a bit better today... oh, and Ich kann dich helfen mit Deutsch, y le puede ayudar con un poco espa�ol tambi�n!
from peggypenny :
Translation: I advice you to be my muse and you will learn Italian more quickly. I am just a songwriter looking for a hook while my husband sleeps in this morning.
from cocoabean :
Sounds like a bunch of bologna to me....
from peggypenny :
il mio consiglio � di essere una musa per me e imparare in fretta
from stepfordtart :
There's no such thing as 'British' language. No wonder you're not learning very fast ;-) s x PS I can say 'I like football' in Russian. Its never been particularly useful to me.
from barefootruby :
I used to know "do not spit out of the window" in Cantonese, but have forgotten owing to the few times (well, never) that I had occasion to use it. I'm sure Stepfordtart and I can come up with a few British words and phrases that you would have difficulty understanding. My Florida-living sister's ex-husband claimed he could never follow the conversation when she was talking to a British friend or relation.
from alethia :
I spent three years of school in French immersion. You know what I remember? "Un anana qui parle? C'est impossible!" (A pineapple that talks? That's impossible!) "Je suis une elephante." (I am an elephant.) and "Ou est le biblioteque?" (Where is the library?) All very handy phrases, I think, even if the grammar is a bit off. Keep up with Italian, and you soon could be as good as I am.
from ninabean :
You've done injured yourself? I swear I need to come around dland more often...(as in .. more than once a year) Hope recovery quickens its speed although I suppose becoming ambidextrous is a great skill to have. Maybe try doing things with your toes next!
from stepfordtart :
Ha! No, Ive never let my kids read my diary - occasionally I'll read a bit out to them in a 'look how funny mummie's being, darling!' sort of way, but obviously those are few and far between! Laughing my stupid arse off at you, though. Good to hear youre sort of on the mend, old chap :-) s x
from jarofporter :
"ha! in soviet russia, marshmallow roasts *you*!" http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-_AREVLTreck/ULlyNgQG8hI/AAAAAAAAANw/awQXnpp4NdM/s1600/yakov_0.jpg
from gonzoprophet :
lmfao. i honestly just stared at it for a while, feelin like some kinda shitty magician.
from jarofporter :
well, i know i've had one before, it would only make sense that i've made one as well, but i can't remember it!? *shrugs*
from jarofporter :
oh, and i can't say that i remember ever having made a "s'more" in my life!?
from jarofporter :
we have some of the best craft beer in the nation here - 5-6 breweries in this town alone! tell me which style you prefer, i'll have some on hand!
from jarofporter :
well, if you're ever close to SW michigan, you have a standing invite to stop by and make s'mores (although I've never done it myself...)
from movingsands :
But you're awesome, how could I not? It was the lemons in the manger that did it, just had to add you lol And anyway, NewWifey� is my new idol :D Hope your long long recovery goes fast fast fast!
from hexes :
also, common people by pulp is a perfect descriptor of my sister. i mean, my family has gotten wealthy enough that we live markedly different lifestyles from the vast majority of the population and i think it's a sign of ignorance to act like it's not a huge benefit we've kind of stumbled over through some bizarre lottery known as fate.
from hexes :
thank you so much for your kind note! i hope your recovery goes well, and i'm very sorry about your marriage and the good food that has been withheld for all those years!
from msafire :
Hope your recovery goes well! Thanks for writing as your hilarious posts are so entertaining and the laughter is a great stress relief after studying all day.
from whystinger :
So how the hell are you? No updates to let us know? Seriously, I hope all is well.
from rockhound :
Well crap, I just saw about your surgery and have missed all this time heckling you when you were incapable of defending yourself! (Not that you were ever able to defend yourself, but you know.) I hope you're making a speedy and percocet-cushioned recovery, and that you're up to no good again in no time at all
from her-story :
Listen. Ever since my semester ended 2 weeks ago, I have found myself inadvertantly looking at the morning talk shows. If you turned gay, then what is my excuse? I hate talk shows. I even watched Rachel Ray explain for 15 minutes how my method of making hamburgers is W-R-O-N-G. Damn her, and her gourmet cat food.
from narcissa :
eek, the worst. good luck! milk that recovery time.. hope everyone is bringing you treats and extra percocet as needed
from narcissa :
eek, the worst. good luck! milk that recovery time.. hope everyone is bringing you treats and extra percocet as needed
from shortst101 :
Hi there! Just wanted you to know I'm thinking about you. Hope you are doing okay. Sandy
from dogsdontpurr :
Hey...just checking in to see how you're doing. You haven't used up all that Percocet have you? My birthday's coming up and I was hoping you'd send me a little care package. (I kid, I kid!!) Really, I hope you're doing well. I'm sending all good vibes for a speedy recovery (and multiple refills on the pain meds!). Also sending good wishes that New Wifey is waiting on you night and day too! Take care my friend~ XxxOoo~ ~DogsDontPurr
from newschick :
BUMMER. casts blow. hope you're recovering/drugging well. xoxo
from portlypete :
Well. if you can't be arsed to reply, I'm sure as hell not going to wish you a speedy recovery. Just lie there soaking up day-time TV and feeling glad you work in radio.
from nilliem :
I've been lax in checking, so here's better late than never! All the happy thoughts for a speedy recovery. RedTube will miss you.
from la-the-sage :
Best wishes for a successful surgery and a speedy recovery. Sorry it needs to be done but hope a pain-free, full use afterward outcome is there for you. ~LA
from jimbostaxi :
Good luck on the surgery! Im expecting a blazing expose on the evils of lime jello from the desk of Dangerspouse very soon.
from annanotbob2 :
Hope all goes well - enjoy the percocet xx
from dogsdontpurr :
Dude~ I had elbow surgery many moons ago. Probably not as severe as what you're having done, but I feel for ya. Get better soon!! I miss your writing. (Yeah, I know...I haven't been all that prolific myself...) Take care...and send me all the Percocet that you don't use. You have my address right?!
from anna-popcorn :
I don't fence anymore; that was just for a year or two.
from la-the-sage :
Terrific news about your ring. Hope Casey is feeling better.
from liesal1979 :
Your poor dog.. and poor you, but seriously, couldn't stop laughing! :) Glad it all worked out ok xx
from stepfordtart :
I lost my wedding ring (from my 1st husband) on my honeymoon! Fell off my skinny finger into the clear blue waters off Cozumel island, never to be seen again. Much more picturesque than your version, fersure! s x
from alethia :
It's an easy card to play, when my deck is stacked with em. ;) I'm blessed* with a double uteris. (*not blessed)
from raven72d :
Above freezing! How springtime in upstate! Anyway--- enjoy a post-polar vortex weekend!
from rockhound :
I'm glad you recovered your ring, and that Casey recovered. And I'm glad I'm not eating dinner at your house any time soon. You know those plates of poo? The poo never fully washes off. If you put them in the dishwasher, you're just distributing poo to the other items in the dishwasher, forever.
from nilliem :
Thank you my old friend. I just caught up and the cat sleeping on my chest is not happy at being disturbed by the laughing...silent laughing so as not to wake the spouse who has to work in the am...but laughing nonetheless!
from raven72d :
Vinifera! A new term, and one I'll use! Thanks! I'm trying to learn about wines late in the day, but I know enough to avoid being dismissive and pretentious about something that should be about enjoyment.
from raven72d :
Amazing! That's quite a background! And...thanks! I'm very much a fan of a good pinot noir, and I did think the person who said that it could never be a "fine wine" was coming it a bit high...
from strawberrri :
Thanks dangerspouse :) I actually really, really hate sambuca, which says a lot about the level of sobriety I'm usually in when I accept a shot of it from someone! I am taking with me to the new flat some bucks fizz left over from Xmas though - rock and/or roll.
from movingsands :
Like a witch in a fairy-tale, except it's real. I guess that means no, can't get away with it >_>
from satelliteabv :
Thanks for explaining some of the DL etiquette/culture. Loud and clear.
from alethia :
Ach, I'm alright. I discovered today why I've been feeling so unbalanced: PMS! :D :D :D So awesome. But I feel better knowing I'm not crazy. Well, no more crazy than usual. ;)
from eloira :
Hey, thanks! It's an interesting ride to be on... As for your latest post, I shouldn't laugh at another's misfortune, but I couldn't help myself; I'm so sorry!! For reasons similar, I no longer wear rings...
from degausser :
He's a dog of many talents.
from stepfordtart :
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Beyond disgusting. s x
from annanotbob2 :
Oh yucky yuck yuck. xx
from jimbostaxi :
I was hoping to work apples and gravity into the conversation but I couldnt squeeze it in! I used to say my names Mudd! But I grew bored with that and moved to Newt! Cooler name but ugly critter :0)
from rockhound :
Happy after-birthday. You are old, lol. Meanwhile, back at the ranch: how do you get your email? Outlook or a website you log into? I gotta have you email me at work so I can troubleshoot LOL
from la-the-sage :
Not Rhode Island, you goofball, Real Life. 3-D, in person. We're just on the other side of Goshen, not Cranston. Warwick is in the middle but I hardly think Burger King is a fit meeting place. Name your diner and the time/date and we'll be there. :-)
from la-the-sage :
Happy Birthday! Sorry I missed THE day. Also sorry you two weren't here for stroganoff. Listen, any time you want to get together in RL please let me know. We're not far apart. Mick is shy and cranky but you, me and New Wifey will make up any lack in the convo. Your near neighbor, ~LA
from stepfordtart :
Haha! remind me again why I dont work in corporate any more. Oh, and thanks for your note which both made me laugh and reaffirmed what I already thought. s x
from cloudy-night :
Sorry for the late response and thanks for the suggestion! But that wasn't the song, it has more of a 70's soul vibe to it. I kind of have forgotten how the song went now, maybe it will hit me again! I mean, it took me roughly 10 years to find out the name of a song that was stuck in my head and when I heard it again... it was okay.
from jimbostaxi :
I had to inject a little humor into the meandering mahem thats my life :0) a few people laughed thats a good thing!!
from barefootruby :
We get messages on the internal website advising us of problems with accessing, er, the internal website.
from smashthegas :
Your boss sounds like the one I used to work for. He once asked me if I'd take some printers down to the 4th floor (we were on the 7th) and said "Be careful carrying that on the stairs, they're so antsy about health and safety these days." I said "Well I'll use a trolley and take it down in the lift." He turned to me as if I'd just invented the wheel and said "My word, I never thought of that!" Yeah.
from whystinger :
My enameled dutch oven is a piece of Emeril cookware! Rounded top that probably won't hold coals or briquettes. Still, I love cooking with cast iron. I have a griddle I bought for making blackened fish. Sucks because you season it, then when you cook the fish, you get it so hot, it takes the seasoning off. Love the patina and smell of warming up that cast iron fry pan! I should use it more. Since your encouragement, I think I will use that enameled cast iron dutch oven!
from whystinger :
I would take the blow job over any cake or Le Creuset any day, but then again... I stayed next to Le Creuset's Charleston, SC headquarters a few weeks ago. I thought of going to the outlet, but then realized (after surfing their site) that I had enough pans and such now. I have an enamel dutch oven, but I wanted a plain cast iron one to cook outside with... over fire or charcoal.
from emu-head :
Ah, but that takes creativity that I often lack. I'll see what I can do, though. That's good advice.
from barefootruby :
not sure how long it would stay in one piece with a cat around!
from stepfordtart :
Hahaha! In that case, ignore my warning with impunity! s x
from vinternatt :
Hello there, many thanks for your kind words.
from jimbostaxi :
Happy bday!
from annanotbob2 :
Ha ha - what Stepfie said! Happy birthday xx
from stepfordtart :
Merry Birthday, old pip! "Dutch Oven" sometimes means "Tit Wank" over here, so go careful with expressions like "nothing could beat my mum's massive Dutch Oven" if in the company of englishers, wontcha? s x
from alethia :
I seriously got a Rainbow Loom. My coworker gave it to me because she said it reminded her of me. Apparently I wear a lot of rainbows. Just because I have a rainbow sweater (or two), rainbow socks (only, like, four pairs), rainbow hats (down to three now), and rainbow mittens...Okay, so rainbow is my favorite colour. I used to worry that I was a closet lesbian who hadn't realized it yet, but now I know...I'm just a dude with a Rainbow Loom.
from stepfordtart :
I made the bacon cake. Check it out! Its fucking delicious. s x
from phaythles :
"I was sick and Christmas happened and ninjas stole my computer and some other shit and I just wasn't able to. Or I was lazy." <----made me tip over from laughing. Seriously. Also I must say your Christmas sounded awesome. Sucks no one showed up but getting drunk, eating good food and playing video games sounds like fun. All that was missing was some karaoke. It fucking sucks for all those who didnt make it to your awesomeness of awesome party. Hell I wasnt even invited and Im sitting here thinking damn how come I didnt go??
from whystinger :
Nope, don't shut up. Not in my case. Needs to be said and heard.
from rockhound :
Congrats on the new haul of goodies AND on getting Christmas off. In broadcasting that's roughly the equivalent of winning the lottery. You have a better chance of being struck by lightning. Given the current weather conditions, I'd duck and cover indeed, if I were you. And when are you going to move to WP like the cool kids, so I can subscribe and actually come harass... er, read WHEN you write except when I remember to come check to see if you updated?
from rockhound :
Congrats on the new haul of goodies AND on getting Christmas off. In broadcasting that's roughly the equivalent of winning the lottery. You have a better chance of being struck by lightning. Given the current weather conditions, I'd duck and cover indeed, if I were you. And when are you going to move to WP like the cool kids, so I can subscribe and actually come harass... er, read WHEN you write except when I remember to come check to see if you updated?
from alethia :
Did you seriously get a Rainbow Loom? Because I seriously got a Rainbow Loom.
from portlypete :
Vasectomy, why would I do that when I have so much to give? Have I never said that sperm donorship is a hobby of mine? Right now, there a hundreds of Portly clones incubating ready for the day when I take ova the World! *turns up reverb* HA, Ha, ha ........ In fact it's an operation in the wrist area. I'll leave you to make the obvious joke.
from newschick :
HUNKER DOWN!
from life-my-way :
"A full saddle of manatee" indeed. You are surely the funniest being incarnate. Hell, you're all that and a wonder Corgi. Happy new year, oh hilarious one.
from phaythles :
Not always but it feels good to find words that probably describe the mood youre in when it comes to hunger. I flicked through a few pages of your stuff and you do cook so you cant honestly with a straight face tell me youve never felt "hoozy" before in your life. Hah!
from catsoul :
12/26/13.....Thanks....this is just how it is. I don't know about "hearty stock" though. Maybe just stubborn and stupid sometimes even with a Master's degree and multiply degrees. I would rather be street smart. OK I will just be a hippy and happy a heck of a lot. I am 58 years old, and still getting tattoos. Do you have tats? Happy Day. Take Care. =^..^=
from newschick :
i'd post a pic of the sonogram showing a clear shot of his manhood, but i don't have a gold account. :)
from newschick :
it's a boy. i know all.
from glorycloud :
"It was big of you to say" I never that expression said to me before. I wonder where that expression originated from? "It was small of you to say" why "it was big of you to say" Weird expression. I have a wonderful day celebrating the birth of the Son of God the Messiah the Lord Jesus Christ. One day we will all before Him worshiping Him. peace Jonny
from glorycloud :
I was being myself. I just found it crazy that you confessed to not believing God and yet I do. I am not mad or anything. Just expressing my thoughts. My wife often tells me I come off intense whereas I feel I am just a quiet simple God lover. I am a man of peace. Sorry if I came off uptight.
from glorycloud :
you describe yourself in your last note as a "recalcitrant atheist"-I find it odd that I am a lover of God and according to you I am loving something that does not exist. So I must be totally mad. Every day I express love to something that does not exist. I read the Bible which I believe is a love letter to me from God and yet according to you there is no personal loving God therefore the Bible is meaningless. I believe God loved me so much He died on the Cross for me to save me from sin and eternal damnation-but if there is no God according to your philosophy the death of the Cross was an act of a mad man because Jesus claimed to be God in the flesh-so according to you all Christians are insane and the only sane people are those who confess there is no God. Therefore life is meaningless so lets all go out and kill each other or just live for ourselves till we fall into the ground and rot. Have a Merry Christmas-wait is not Christmas a celebration of the birth of the Messiah the Son of God-who was born to save His people from their sins. Well hope all is well in your godless world.
from newschick :
oh my god... you are some character. and what's with NJ people putting trees everywhere? my town is covered with them on people's porches... if i had known that last year i would have just nabbed one of them for my own. in other news, your wife is a SAINT.
from eloira :
I guess you could utilise the choc/chilli/salt combo for any chocolate recipe, and I may have to test that piece of logic to satisfy my own curiosity. Love the food porn on your page today by the way. My festive offerings pale in comparison. Thanks for the well wishes too, fingers crossed!!
from catsoul :
12/22/13...I am the Queen of Shoveling here on the Island. I even do a lot of shoveling for the 70 something year old guy(hermit) across the road from us. I can't use the 4-wheeler with the snowplow on the inner part of his driveway because he doesn't want all the stones up on his grass, so there I use the snowblower or just hand shovel it when I want more exercise. I have our driveway end to open up, and two driveway ends to open up for him. I have to keep clear where the pumper truck comes in to empty the septic tanks. The first area I usually clear are the decks and steps. Then I do a path to the mailbox. She(the mailcarrier) won't deliver unless she can drive up to the box. She also won't drive back here unless the plow guy has plowed. One time she got so stuck, she ended up at our house for a couple of hours. OK, back to shoveling/clearing away the snow. YES, I most definitely do the shoveling. I also roof rake the garage. I roof rake as much of the house roof as I can. I fell off the roof awhile back and so I no longer will do the back second story. Remember I also have a bulging disk so I have had to modify my shoveling technique. All is good. In the past 7 days I have been shoveling 5 of those days, 3-4 hours each day off and on. I figure with it still snowing now, I will be shoveling today and tomorrow. I take it one day at a time here with the snow. Silly you for wondering if I had nothing much to do in my life. I wanted to go take down a dead tree if it warmed up a bit, but that has been put on the back burner until I(we) get the snow cleared. I also have two lots I(we) bought to clear/cut the dead trees and fallen wood from. I do all the Fall and Spring cleanup. I plant a garden. I take care of the birds. Did I mention before that I can't take the wreath down now until Spring because there are some goldfinches that sit in the wreath. They are pretty smart. So Dangerspouse, thanks for asking about the shoveling, and I really don't mind. If you keep your feet and hands warm, and do the layers you can stay out pretty long. Take Care. =^..^=
from glorycloud :
I forgot to mention in my last note I do have in my library "Theology Of The Old Testament" by Walter Brueggemann. I like this section from the interview- Ms. Tippett: You know, I heard you speak very poignantly this morning to preachers about the fact that there are things that can't be said from the pulpit. Sometimes it feels like they should be said. You said there are silences that it's hard to break. Following on the way we're talking about, this is hard for preachers, religious leaders, to adopt this prophetic voice or draw on these prophetic themes. You know, I think even if you and I talk about this, it's kind of a difficult conversation to have in this culture, right? Mr. Brueggemann: It's very difficult, and I think the difficulty is that all of us, liberals and conservatives, all of us are basically contained in the ideology of consumer capitalism. We want that to be our universe of meaning. And when you get a poetic articulation that moves outside of that, it's just too anxiety-producing for most of us, so we try to stop that kind of talk. In a local church, obviously people have a lot of leverage for being able to stop that kind of talk. Ms. Tippett: So what is it hard for preachers to talk about here? Mr. Brueggemann: Well, I think at the broadest level, it is hard to talk about the fact � I think it's a fact � that our society has chosen a path of death in which we have reduced everything to a commodity. We believe that there are technical solutions to everything, so it doesn't matter whether you talk about the over-reliance on technology, the mad pursuit of commodity goods, our passion for violence now expressed as our war policies. All of those are interrelated to each other and none of us, very few of us, really want to have that exposed as an inadequate and dehumanizing way to live. I think, if one is grounded in the truth of the gospel as a Christian, that's what we have to talk about. So preachers are really put in a very difficult fix of having been entrusted to talk about that stuff. Ms. Tippett: And they also belong to this culture. Mr. Brueggemann: That's right. Ms. Tippett: And we get that these characteristics are part of our birthright. Mr. Brueggemann: That's right, they are. And preachers � we � are as deeply implicated in it as anyone else. That's exactly right, yeah.
from glorycloud :
thanks for the link-will listen to it today here is where you can read my major blog http://crookedfingers.livejournal.com/profile
from rockhound :
Those look luscious. Angel food is a favorite, and I would imagine the lemon would add the perfect tweak to offset its inherent blandness. Yeah, not the time of year to lose weight, as a rule, lol.
from jimbostaxi :
JaniesTaxi , Aaa yes that has a ring to it ! Lmao
from jimbostaxi :
"Fragile " it must be from Italy Great movie!
from jimbostaxi :
Lmao! We live on the bad side of town all they could afford was the foot!
from alethia :
WHATEVA! Clothes are for pansies and the weak! THE WEAK! I SHALL NEVER CONFORM!!11!11
from jimbostaxi :
Np! Anytime ! Thanks for notes
from jimbostaxi :
When i was a youngster we moved around like once a year gesh you think we had gypsy in our blood ! I didnt want to do that to my daughter so we havent moved in 12 years. She will be finishing high shool with the kids she grew up so i did pretty good! Oh by the way your blog is great added you to my list!
from portlypete :
I can be a tad slow sometimes. It took me a while to get your clever homonym. So, you don't like Latin American dances? But I bet you make a mean salsa.
from emu-head :
I'm on my way over to eat that angel food cake.
from portlypete :
How can you NOT like meringue? I love your quaint transatlanic spelling BTW - so colourful. That mango tart looked good enough to eat though.
from catsoul :
Thanks man for that uplifting note, haha. The truth can be sad at moments, but that does pass. I am glad what I wrote hit a chord and response in you. If we go throughout our lives with a range of feelings/emotions our lives wouldn't exist. So Danger...thanks again. =^..^= P.S. I do a lot and have a lot to do. I keep busy. It is my days flow into one another, and that is how it goes. Take Care.
from alethia :
I make a lemon curd so fine that it will make you spontaneously ejaculate. I try never to serve it to family, because it all just gets weird. (And I totally use Meyer lemonds. They're expensive as shit way up here in the Frozen North, but as you now know, totally worth it.)
from rockhound :
It sounds as though the scenario with the Meyers lemons was a win-win for all concerned, except for Poolie's picking up the shipping costs, I mean. As to the lemon tart, it looks heavenly. I will definitely have to try your modifications next time I build a crust, though. I'd never have thought to add alcohol to it but I would imagine it makes a huge difference.
from stepfordtart :
Ive made all those yummy things you mentioned, but never with Mayer lemons. We just dont really get them here - see! http://www.thegrocer.co.uk/fmcg/fresh/sweet-meyer-lemon-hits-tesco-produce-shelves/235511.article *sad face* s x
from eloira :
Thanks for your advice! Turns out you were spot on.
from aryssa90 :
I really do love Bill, he is perfect (to me and for me) in every single way except for sex. I married him and have stayed with him knowing that sex was an issue because, as much as I love it, It wasn't always like this but in the last 2 years or so, he's had some medical issues that have contributed to this. I have been sad alot lately, but it's not jsut because of the sex stuff. I think I have depression and I'm waiting until my insurance kicks in to go to a psych, so that makes everything worse also. I really do appreciate your note and you asking! I do love Bill and I do hope things will change but even if they don't, there is so much other good in the relationship and that really outweighs any bad :)
from steroidalelf :
LMAO to the ending of your last entry. Excellent build up sir.
from barefootruby :
My gf's 14-year old son summed up the situation you wrote about when we were sympathizing with him about being the only make in the house. "Yes, there's a new word I've learned - "Synchronicity". There are a few days every month when I really don't want to be here"
from portlypete :
To reply to your last message might be to risk brutal punishment under that well-known funadamentalist moral code made so famous by Stevie Wonder in his song "Oh, my Shari@ L@w".
from portlypete :
I Googled in vain for a humourously named knitting stitch to tie in with your last link. All I learned was that "Reversible stitch patterns are used for knitting items such as dish-cloths". Who the whatever knits dish cloths!?!?
from portlypete :
Full marks for reading my post before I'd even edited those nasty HTML links, but 0/10, I fear, for observation: it's the same old background I've always had. (I bet you record your Xmas stuff sometime in June - be honest).
from papotheclown :
Why, thank you. I have been agnostic for 13 years now, but somedays I wish I wasn't. The lady and I have decided to not live together at the present time.
from catsoul :
12/9/13....I laughed all the way through your writing today. Thanks. I appreciate your womanly empathy, just be glad you got a few good days with your mom and sisters. I so do appreciate binoculars myself. Anyhoo.....great job being the big brother. =^..^= P.S. Love the t-shirt she will get...doesn't ever woman want one of those.
from whystinger :
My wife's work boss lost an assload of weight and took coconut oil pills and some other shit. We bought some coconut oil, as the pills were really expensive. After that, I started reading. Got an oil with a bit of the coconut taste. Saute' shrimp in it and wow! Adds some sweet coconut flavor. Of course, you can buy refined with no taste. I find that for some things, the mild coconut flavor is good, sort of like adding some sesame oil to stir fries. Fish also comes out good in it. My sis claims it has a higher smoke point and has health benefits. I just liked the flavor and alleged health benefits (dental oil pulling). It just tastes good. On the other hand, I have a bunch of olive oil infused with a few flavors.
from rockhound :
Wow. New Wifey will be overjoyed with something so thoughtful.
from jimbostaxi :
I.C.P makeup to buy feminine hygiene products thats awesome,and great gift idea!
from whystinger :
I'd wondered where the hell you had gotten off to. Glad you are back so I have more reading... The shrimp dish was pretty awesome, that is one of the benefits of living close to the coast where they harvest local wild shrimp. Seafood is fresh and affordable. I enjoyed the Wisniowka and Jesznowka. I plum forgot about the Slivowitz (sorry, couldn't resist). Polish plum brandy! In fact, I have never had any, now I gotta find some, will put my cousin and his wife on it! I ALWAYS take the sex. Problem is, she offers it, teases about it and does not give it up. Hey, ever cook with coconut oil? O, BTW, LOVE the T-shirt!
from whystinger :
I love lamb too. My wife is the same. Hates lamb and venison!
from atwowaydream :
Hey, hey, now, I know how to cook, but I usually don't do it unless it's for other people. When it comes to me though, I would bake a Ramen cake and eat the shit out of it. I love Ramen, even though I can only have the oriental flavor, it really does something for my laziness after getting home from work. Glad my entry made you giggle. Friggin' cats, man.
from shortst101 :
LOL! Your stories still crack me up!!! Hope you are doing well! Sandy
from fifidellabon :
I looooove lamb! And yes, your way of cooking it is deffo thee best! XOFifi
from kungfukitten :
Your lamb post had me laughing a lot, thanks for the chuckle. You're an awesome blogger.
from raven72d :
I wonder what they were cooking... (I really love the song)
from glorycloud :
The photos of the redtail hawk does show his colors. A redtail hawk is blackish brown with a brownish white spotted chest-big birds. We usually see hawks this time of year by our birdfeeder. Happy Thanksgiving!
from rockhound :
Happy working Thanksgiving to you. I'm with you - done right, lamb is the acme of meat products. Of course done badly it's just... bad. I took your advice and am now officially published with bookcountry.com. Betcha never thought I'd do it, did you? They tell me another 4-6 weeks to be picked up by the other outlets, and I have yet to figure out what to do on the print front. It's all your fault, you know ;)
from jimbostaxi :
Thanks for the note and confirming my gut feelig that the guy was a dick.
from imdeadtoyou :
RH foil....and Epee when I'm really sad.
from a-d-w :
touche
from newschick :
being pregs is not stopping my coffee + sips of the ole brews from the hubbs. but i'm afraid i must draw the line at hard liquor. ;) and don't you worry bout me, this gal doesn't listen to a thing. i still have yet to read a word about 'how to deal with a child'...winging it is my plan!
from whystinger :
Just wait, as we age, it takes more stimulation, so 5,000 meters of back and forth shoulder motion might not be a good idea but it is the only way.... ha ha ha!
from whystinger :
I went back and re-read the kishke entry. Still enjoyable the third time through. Has me thinking - what the hell did Grandma use for casings for her buckwheat keshka (spelled the way she pronounced it)? Surely some type of "natural casing" but maybe... Down here in the South (and up North when I lived there) some eat 'chitlins and you know, "ain't nuthin worse than finding a piece of corn in your 'chitlins.
from glorycloud :
I suffer from depression. The Lord gives me grace to keep going. Thanks for the note and have a good weekend. peace Jonny
from whystinger :
By the way, thanks for the info about the cortisone shot. Honi had several in her spine and they provided relief relatively fast. for me, the day after the shot, my shoulder was achey and is still a achey today. Still, while it aches, I detect some of the tendons catching and popping may be gone. Helps me know to have patience.
from whystinger :
Whoa, Jewish soul food! I will definitely have to re-read the entry a few times! Coming from Eastern European roots, namely Poland and the Ukraine, I grew up with a lot of that, plus having Jewish friends... and possibly some Jewish blood in the family history, made us early multi-cultural... We what is your kishke stuffed with? Ours had a few versions, mostly based on buckwheat stuffing. Sometimes buckwheat and blood sausage. I am weakest in my knowledge and eating of Jewish cuisine. I need to rectify that at some time! Loved the entry
from catsoul :
hi, 11/14/13 now. So thanks for the note you wrote. I am wondering if you were just randomly reading entries? I do that sometimes. I just wanted you to know that I don't usually write like that, all "Debbie downer" like. My folks did call from the Great North, and they are still waiting to hear the results of his test. Thanks for your interest, and have a good Thursday. Take Care. =^..^=
from newschick :
Lest you forget I'm knocked up. No bloody Mary's for me.. :( and this is the season for SLOE GIN AND TONICS. My absolute winter fave.
from raven72d :
I grew up in the Deepest South--- cow intestines? Sure, why not? I love cracklins and gizzards.
from narcissa :
that was a great story, start to finish.
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks, pal xx
from misspinkkate :
Hahahahahahaha! Yes, I had the baby. He's a toddler now! I should probably do a little fill-in post :D
from newschick :
you rock. i made a big ole batch of pineapple habanero jelly (first attempt at canning) and it is AWESOME (i feel so southern housewifey), but i still have about 10 of em left. i have a big bottle of tito's vodka staring at me from my dining room, perhaps it will get zapped. thanks so much!
from rockhound :
I think better gun control is a start, but can't help wondering how much of this crap is orchestrated to keep those average Joes (and Janes) of us from going apeshit on our government. I don't advocate that kind of violence, but I sure would understand it, especially after the most recent Congressional fiasco with the budget.
from newschick :
hey chef, so i have a massssssive bowl of habaneros from the last of the garden... any suggestions? they're so spicy that it's hard to find a use for so many of them. i'm drying out my cayennes but that's about all i can do with them... already have a big batch chopped in the freezer for future use.
from newschick :
i don't really have an alternative... 1&9 truck route? ugh. the turnpike takes me to the wrong side of hoboken, and it takes even longer. thanks for reminding me that the day after the super bowl, my life is SCREWED.
from rockhound :
I hope the shoulder/arm issue gets resolved soon. You should be writing too. You could do anecdotes and collect them. Erma Bombeck did it for women, no reason you couldn't do it from a male perspective.
from adaorardor :
Just enough to leave to your imagination. :)
from newschick :
if it makes you feel better, i spent 6 weeks of 2013 in an above-elbow cast for my wrist surgery, followed by a few months in wrist rehab (it exists). it wasn't fun, but now i can lift a pan again (and i guess i could wank with this hand, too) (girls don't seem to be as hand-specific as men?) so it was worth it.
from stepfordtart :
Use the other hand? s x
from rockhound :
You cook like I do. Leftover bread dough, a few cheese scraps, and leftover veggies from last night? Throw in some chicken bullion, dice up some onion, add pepper, and call it dinner. No chicken? Hey, that pork chop hasn't reached its expiration date, so it gets elected instead. Side note - thank you VERY much for the publishing recommend. I decided to go with that option. If the stuff they have us review is any indication, I should land a ten-book contract, yeesh. (Part of the deal is you have to review and provide constructive criticism to budding authors. It's painful.)
from life-my-way :
So, Danger, I've been reading you for a long time and it looks like we have friends in common (Anna and LA among others--Hissy once upon a time), and I'm not sure why I didn't add you ages ago. I don't really write at dland much anymore, but do occasionally post something at instantnostalgia.com. Thanks for the note. Also, I liked the rice cake joke. Cheers! Katherine
from occoquan1 :
Thanks! :D Not entirely dour. ;D
from alethia :
Trouble is, I'm a freelancer. So a fuck up for me could mean never getting hired again. No two weeks notice. No severence pay. Just radio silence. I don't know whether I want that, or don't want that.
from occoquan1 :
I'm adopting two kittens from the humane society. That's good. ;P
from narcissa :
definitely in the 3rd category on that one.
from barefootruby :
Hey I've just seen you comment about my diary: "doesn't like radio announcers". Not true. I don't like radio announcers who enunciate poorly. We have some of the best on the BBC - Alan 'Deadly' Deddicote, John 'Boggy' Marsh, Brian Perkins. One of the best things to listen too is the shipping forecast - sheer poetry (even if we have no idea what it means). And the football (soccer) results on a Saturday afternoon are pretty good too. You can often guess the score of the second team from the tone of the announcer.
from barefootruby :
I might have to try that apple recipe some day. In UKland we can get Bramley apples - they're kind of bigger and less sweet, and more 'solid' than standard apples. They are not much for eating raw, but great for cooking with. In fact they are often called 'cooking apples' (as opposed to 'eating apples'). But I don't think you can get them anywhere else - not even in NZland where sometimes they are more British than the British. And the linguistic nerd in me liked your use of "apple meat". Confirmation of something I read yesterday that explained that originally 'meat' meant all food, not just the stuff that animals are made of.
from raven72d :
Okay...now I'm jonesing for fresh-made, hot apple pie. Or cold peach pie.
from raven72d :
Thanks! (As much as I like malbec, I'm more used to $12-$15 the bottle than per glass)
from ninabean :
sweet mother of Avon, that was quite the story. I was certain the DS would be a casualty by the end of the post but apparently you're all alive and well. Thanks for comin by my dusty old diary again, its awesome to know that someone recalls my existence as most diaries I see here are of users who were probably 5 years old when I started blogging.
from raven72d :
Good information! Figurative Hangul poetry could be a delight... (And I hadn't known about the anniversary--- thanks for telling me!)
from rockhound :
Ouch. Aside from the scent explosion - which makes me glad you're on the opposite side of the country - the talon wounds and blunt force trauma from your contact with the floor must've taken their collective toll, too. You have my sympathy. And a gas mask.
from saintanne :
Thanks for the note and adivice. I think marriage counseling would be helpful. Unfortunately he won't go. Honestly the last couple of days I really had to start admitting and accepting the cold hard truth. I don't think he's ever coming back and it needs to just be over :( Thanks again for the advice. Heck it's nice to know someone actually reads what I say.
from raven72d :
I was thrilled to find it on YouTube! (The film version of Bulgakov's "The Master and Margarita" is on YouTube in segments, too!) I thought Palin and Curry were both brilliant.
from raven72d :
Bummel is a great word... Though I rather like being an Idle Fellow myself. (Have you seen the mid-'70s film version of "Three Men in a Boat"? Michael Palin and Tim Curry?)
from raven72d :
"On the bummel"? A Jerome K. Jerome reference!
from raven72d :
As long as "artisanal charcuterie" isn't the opening to a horror film!
from rockhound :
The eggs are lovely. Lots of work behind them! If your corgi is life-size, you either need to put an end to his diet or get some smaller eggs.
from cloudy-night :
Sorry for the late reply and thank you for the sympathy. I think it's nice that there is someone who relates to my feelings. Thank you again.
from narcissa :
hahaha, i love that lifesize corgi (also the eggs)
from narcissa :
dude. 3:30 PM. so sad.
from friskyseal :
sure, one week it was killer bees, the next it was killer sharks. i just remember distinctly that it would introduce an insect, describe it as the most wicked and dangerous, and then a second insect or group of insects would come and completely dismantle it.
from newschick :
No I did not know about Entenmann's outlet but we passed one yesterday when visiting a friend...I about died! No one told me there were OUTLETS! :D
from rockhound :
Oh, and I finally finished writing That Damned Book. Just thought I'd tell you.
from rockhound :
Congrats on the weight loss. Atkins - the actual Atkins, not the hyped bacon-first variety - really does work and if you eat the recommended veggies it's even healthier than most of us ate before Atkins. Go you!
from newschick :
but on a serious note, that SUCKS. ironically, i feel that most women WANT to normalize breastfeeding. so why should a comment like that offend anybody? Whatever. oh and FYI: when I read it, i laughed. i'm glad it worked out for you and that you handled it appropriately.
from newschick :
on my first day of work, i had a crowd of 6 male colleagues around me, asking innocent questions to get to know me. upon finding out i had moved from ireland, i was asked if i was irish. i was responding, 'no, i'm american' when my new boss walked up and EXCLAIMS 'she's irish by insertion!' now, IMAGINE the awkwardness that ensued after THAT. i was red as a tomato but decided, actually, that was funny. laughed along with the 6 men, and we still today laugh about it today. oh, and my boss is female.
from alethia :
I know! I know. :( I won't. It would only end it tears and...well, I was going to say smashed dishes, but truthfully, it'd just be more tears. I'll only sleep with a man in a gold wedding band if I'm wearing a matching one...but I can still fantasize. ;)
from alethia :
I work in the entertainment industry, which is an industry rapidly changing from being entirely male-dominated, to about half and half. We're still bumping up against the Good Ole Boys, who think women should get out of the theatre/movies, so I'm pretty sensitive to sexism...and yet...I would have TOTALLY made the same comment to that woman. I'm also of the opinion that if I wouldn't file a complaint against a woman making that comment, I wouldn't do it against a man. Because hell, this is the 21st century.
from fifidellabon :
Stepfie said it so much better! XOFifi
from stepfordtart :
Fucking hell. Im sure I should be putting some kind of reasoned argument/comment together here but all I can think of to say is "IS SHE FUCKING MAD????". If she finds the thought of the mention of breasts in that context so horrific and demeaning, Im sure that the circumstances surrounding her actually getting pregnant were a bundle o' fuckin joy. *shakes head*. Sympathies to you, old boy. You did nothing wrong. s x
from fifidellabon :
Wow, that was some serious chizz. When I was pregnant I was totally a whacked-out freakazoid due to hormones. Unforch, you can't say that to an expectant Mum, nor pretty much anything else besides subjects like the weather. I am sorry for your experience, ad I'll bet the person in question will realise how whacked she was, but only in about 5 years, if my experience is the norm. XOFifi
from annanotbob2 :
Sorry, my mistake x
from joistmonkey :
British basketball team The Blackburn Botty Bandits hat to change their name - because they relocated to the nearby town of Bolton.
from annanotbob2 :
Grim. Glad you made it through without having to resort to Alabama x
from barefootruby :
I had a marriage like that too
from barefootruby :
Today I was giving a training course and, before we started I was having a bit of banter / mock argument with one of the students who I've known for a few years. One of the other students asked "excuse me, are you two married?". Is that sexual harassment?
from barefootruby :
Speaking as someone who from time to time is involved in investigations of this sort, I'm surprised the claim wasn't thrown out. As JM said below, you weren't referring to her breasts in any sexual way; you were referring to them as a food source for the small squidgy thing. Had you said "beautiful" or "large" or "well-formed", yes that would have been out-of-order. But you didn't and some people need to get their head out of their arse and recognise what is innocent conversation and what is sexual harassment. Unfortunately, making an issue out of things like this only serves to weaken the cause for genuine harassment cases as people assume all cases are similar non-events
from cocoabean :
I agree with you, she should have said something to you first instead of going to management. I don't consider that to be harrassment, but if it at all made her uncomfortable that in itself is a form of harrassment. But really!
from joistmonkey :
Sorry, yep, my unclearness w.r.t. not properly discerning between litigation and in-work accusation - I was trying to make the point that in theory we all deserve to work/live in an environment free from stuff we find offensive.. but life is a chaos of different people and views and it's a pipe dream to think that an individual will never hear/see anything which they find distasteful or against their views. Of course there are things which can be seen as uncivilised and which we can have generally accepted laws or work policy about, but there is also stuff on the 'edge' of that - like your case. I'm just saying that the worry and trauma you've suffered being accused seems an unfortunate price to pay for having a work environment in which a light-hearted remark is treated similarly to the out and out sexist behaviour the policies are designed to prevent. I'd contrast my most recent working environment where it was predominantly a female office and the 'man-hating' banter was sometimes a bit offensive to me, but I didn't feel strongly enough about it to complain formally. I was probably sexist back in return.. which isn't 'right', but fortunately these colleagues were OK with the 'banter'. I can accept that colleagues coming into the office from elsewhere would have found things offensive, and we were all asked to cease/tone down because of this. Mixed blessings.
from joistmonkey :
Oh, and I meant to leave a note after the heating milk debacle regarding the potential microbiological risk that heat-stable microbial toxins might cause, but I forgot. And it's only a potential risk, and you seem to not be vomiting uncontrollably. Or am I not allowed to refer to milk any more because of sexual harassment laws? :-)
from joistmonkey :
Whoa. I wanted to be typically glib and say something along the lines of "I'm sorry to hear that you're a voracious sex pest", but judging by the worry and trauma that you and the wife must've had, I'm not going to. It's a shame that we live in such a litigious/inflexible world (albeit I'd guess the US is moreso than the UK.. though we're catching up) but I understand that the principle of such laws is important, though the application can be troublesome - esp. when 'accusation' can be as damaging as 'proven' for reputation. Hope you have an easier time of it now anyhow. PS - I was wondering whether referring to breasts in the context of their lactation function is 'sexual', in contrast with their function as secondary sexual characteristics? Feeling uncomfortable about you referring to breasts in their function as baby feeders isn't 'sexual' per se?
from ubermeister :
Sorry fella, didn't see this. Didn't realize anyone still read my diary. I was working in mental health as a health care assistant, and I knew pretty much straight away that it wasn't for me. Still cycling too, getting lots of use out of the cyclocross bike. Hope all is well.
from her-story :
I was rooting for her to pee in it... According to Bear Grylls a person can drink their own urine, eat a live fish and climb inside of a dead dear carcass. Desperate measures, my friend.
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks xx
from newschick :
Yup. im not reallllly complaining. more just updating my diary on 'the state of things'. we had dinner w/ a couple and their 2 year old last night. he actually wasn't too bad, but i think my fella got a good dose of our impending reality... muhahaha. also, the place was like, one of the best burgers i've ever eaten. in a straight up shithole, but AWESOME food.
from shewholies :
Actually, I fed it to the cats.... Does that make it more or less terrible?
from barefootruby :
My knowledge of matters agricultural are limited (pretty much to what I pick up from The Archers (daily radio drama series)) but I think bovine TB is not uncommon, though not prevalent. I don't know why badgers have been identified as the culprit.
from rockhound :
I knew there was a reason I liked NewWifey. She's made for you. Probably because she's made you.
from stepfordtart :
Yes - its essential for millionaires shortbread! OMIGOSH I love condensed milk. In dark moments I have been known to spread it direct from the tin onto buttered crusty bread. Dont judge me. s x
from stepfordtart :
Hmm,sounds a bit like home made evaporated milk (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evaporated_milk). Think Im right in saying you dont get that stuff over there (and young people dont know it much over here) but it was a store cupboard staple before everyone had a fridge. Nothing like condensed milk and has that slightly caramel taste you describe. Interesting! s x
from jarofporter :
i know, right? http://blogs.dallasobserver.com/unfairpark/unpossible.jpg
from newschick :
And that entry proves that you are married to your soulmate. :)
from annanotbob2 :
Ha ha - I enjoyed that. Is it true or just 'true' about the milk? Sounds perfect for camping x
from rockhound :
I will ignore the floor jack because something tells me it was only a partial exaggeration this time. Next time you encounter recalcitrant meat in a can, take off both top and bottom, then use your Swiss Army knife to cut a line straight down one side of the can . It will allow you to peel off the can like stripping away alligator skin, only not quite as tough. It won't inspire a new line of cross stitched sunglasses, but could save you from becoming a murder victim.
from dogsdontpurr :
Cheers to NewWifey's success! Love the glasses. And thanks for stopping by my blog again. Our internet has been spotty at best, so I've been overly slow with getting more pictures up. And now we're on the road again which means more stories and photos are piling up. But stay tuned! More soon!
from jarofporter :
well, i'm glad at least someone finds my angst amusing... the driver is a taylormade R7 draw. http://www.golfbekas.com/files/joko_golfer/tmdraw.jpg
from newschick :
HAHAHA. Yeah that's pretty much it! My poor child! I really don't know what I'm going to do without my usual 9 hours sleep. UGH.
from newschick :
the magic wand only showed me globs which the nurse kept calling 'follicles'. they looked massive on the screen, there must be a good zoom lens. and i refuse to post a single picture of uh, the embryo/fetus/child online, so you'll just have to google FOLLICLE and see what happens. :)
from whystinger :
I used to read your diary in the past (a few years ago) but have not been real active on Diaryland. Was snooping in Stepfie's diary, saw a note and clicked in... Saw the glasses (cool!) and read down a bit about "Polish canned meat." was going to drop you a note about it, then read down further... WOW, a small world. I am not sure about expired Polish canned meat, but in the past, Poland was pretty famous for canned hams. This was before the demise of the U.S.S.R. I remember my Polish Grandma telling us about the shortage of meat in Poland, but seeing many Polish canned hams on store shelves. I have not seen many in the last 10-20 years. I went back in to your diary and read a bit more, then snorted hot coffee out of my nose. I read "on a clearance shelf in Vernon, NJ." Holy crap, I lived there years ago and have friends there/from there. I'm thinking it (grocery stores) used to be A&P in Vernon and ShopRite in Franklin, NJ. Is Sal and Joes still in business in Hamburg? I lived in the condos in Great Gorge. Thanks for the trip down memory lane.
from stepfordtart :
I have seven burners. Envy me. s x
from la-the-sage :
You cook on electric? Gads, how awful for you.~LA
from la-the-sage :
The glasses are FABULOUS! Yes, the 5th burner limits pan size. Something I didn't realize until too late. I'd skip it if I were offered a do-over. I'd still get an LG stove though. The oven temp is dead accurate and the big power burners are wicked useful. ~LA
from portlypete :
Here's a tip - just take an angle-grinder to the side of your pork cans and they open up like a whore's thighs. Simple!
from melodymetuka :
The title of the song on my cd is 'Manamanap.' It is an older song that was recorded in (I think) the forties, and of course it is perfect for a bunch of muppets. ;-)
from joistmonkey :
Them glasses are super cute. I generally dislike sunglasses (something vaguely connected to not being able to see people's eyes, and the importance of eyes in communication) but I'm making an exception for those. I worry about Clostridium botulinum w.r.t. canned meat - please don't catch botulism. As for 'pork yoghurt', a victory for verbal alchemy.. from Nirvana song 'Big Cheese' to that misheard as 'Pig Cheese' to other porcine dairy products..
from stepfordtart :
Came over here to rattle on about the amount of Polish foodstuffs we get here (massive Polish community in this area) but OMIFUCKINGOD, those glasses!!!!! And Readers, too!!! WANTWANTWANT! If you want a UK distributor....................Just sayin' :-). s x PS Metallic thread ones would be good - just a little bit of bling.
from divamel :
Oh, Dangerspouse! I didn't know how much I'd missed you until I wandered across you again. *flings poo gleefully in your general direction*
from pink-sapfire :
THNX!! I'm hoping like hell that that never happens between the two of us.
from cruel-irony :
Ha! Stock-flavored coffee sounds pretty good actually. I'm sure it's got a more robust flavor. By the way, thanks for the note. I need to get into a routine of some sort for updating and your note has inspired me to get serious about it. Thanks!
from smashley719 :
Thank you for the birthday wishes and advice, it definitely gave me a good laugh, which was greatly needed. Chicken-flavored coffee sounds...interesting, although being able to keep a secret from your wife for so long definitely means that you are a master amongst men; my husband can't keep a secret to save his life! :)
from newschick :
Haha. I only work in Hoboken. And they can't get an hvac system to work so my office is always freezing so I'm cool! But dawn is a legend... Met her recently!
from dogsdontpurr :
Ok....so I got out my trifocals and flipped through the Diaryland manual and figured out how to leave a note all up in here. I left you another reply over in my "Comments" section because I wasn't sure if "Notes" still had anyone working the telegraph this late at night. Ha!
from jarofporter :
i'm flattered, i think!? lol
from newschick :
i'm probably 35% carefree around food - where i can go days and days without even thinking the word calorie. i still have my moments. but the more i learn about food, the more i change the relationship between it and me. so i'm happy. now, would you PLEASE write me an entry solely dedicated to CASEY THE WONDER CORGI??! :)
from scullerymaid :
Haha love the coffee maker story. Good entertainment while I count away the hours at work!
from newschick :
You're an ASS! And fyi i'm NEW to the game. And am spatially challenged!
from rockhound :
And once again I am reminded why I don't drink coffee. Fowl brew indeed. On the other hand - what an awesome way to insure you've got clear stock!
from stepfordtart :
Hahaha! Im torn between feeling NewWifey's pain, being also fair of skin and not really able to cope in hot weather. Also have just grown my hair the longest it has been for more than 20 years after losing it all to cancer. Also kind of taking your side too as loving the long hair is kind of a guy thing and I know y'all feel a bit bereft when we get a trim. I shan't take sides, I'll just laugh. s x PS Im sure she looks gorgeous btw.
from newschick :
I'm back caught up! and am laughing because i'm currently writing this on a CHEAP AS SHIT ikea couch that is starchy and scratchy and GROSS but we *also* hauled it away in a fake tiny "suv". so 10 years from now, i'll be f*cking my husband on a new couch? sounds good.
from portlypete :
Sex, for me, is more Swift than Swallow.
from stepfordtart :
thanks for letting me know - not sure how to fix that but the kids are back from their dads tomorrow so perhaps they will be able to sort it for me - its worth the wait, fersure! s x
from stepfordtart :
*fairly* convinced that IS a different kind of bogey ;-) s x
from marron4 :
I just did! Maybe too much for you though!
from stepfordtart :
Other people's curtains - part of life's rich tapestry. One's own curtains - rude. As is wiping a bogey under one's own dining table. s x PS Bogey = Booger
from stepfordtart :
Seriously? There's people who would spit on THEIR OWN FURNITURE? Thats just rude. Like wiping your dick on your own curtains! s x
from stepfordtart :
Hahaha! Nicely told! L's dimwit sister gave us her reclining furniture when she moved house - every bit reclines seperately and with an electric mechanism (no jerky handles!). Its massive, blackleather, and totally not our taste but OHHHHHH the lying back and enjoying in front of the tv! Joy. (plus, its wipe clean ;-) ) s x
from jarofporter :
yes, my profile is a lie, as are most things in my life. i suppose i'll have to change it...
from scullerymaid :
Thanks for the tip! I'll keep that in mind next time a guy shows up outside my door in salmon shorts. Cracks me up whenever I picture him on his little scooter in his little shorts hahaha
from her-story :
First of all... when are moving to wordpress? I have to keep remembering how to log in to DL when I want to leave you a message. You can brine a whole turkey but I've never heard of a salt soak for chicken parts. I thought you were a foodie. Dude that was a moment Chef Ramsey would call a major fuck-up. I do "marinate" steak in low sodium soy sauce because it acts like a meat tenderizer. Thats the only way this chicken-and-fish eater to partake in the meat ripping (eating beef). Keep on keepin' on super trooper. :)
from rockhound :
Umm... yeah. Salt poisoning isn't the smartest thing you could do. Next time you decided to overdose on sodium, hit the ER. 40 tsp is a lethal dose for an adult and the symptoms you describe suggest you're mighty damned close.
from stepfordtart :
Hahaha! Im so sorry, but Im laughing plenty at this.s x
from strawberrri :
Oh thank you, so kind of you to leave me a note :) I am more than impressed with your wife's car-related achievements! I haven't owned a car for ages - I let mine grow moss all over the outside then (accidentally albeit gently) crashed into the back of someone about three years ago and it had to go and live at the scrapyard (sob). Hope you have a brill weekend!
from glorycloud :
You asked me "Is there any sort of disconnect between what you read in that book and what really happens in the world outside its pages that will convince you that the Bible is just not a good predictor of things like Divine Judgement?" Good question-the Bible does not give us detailed descriptions of divine judgments but does set forth a view of Reality that we must all seek to conform to either on a personal level or a societal level-for example is our culture living according to the Ten Commandments outwardly-is our society living for the glory of the Lord God or bowing down to the image of man? If as a society we have decided to live in rebellion against the Creator God we will not be blessed but experience divine curses. I personally see all around me here in America people reaping moral corruption and not the fruits of righteous living. All around me I see men and women in a state of moral and spiritual chaos or emptiness-running after vainty-chasing after wind. All this is revealed in the pages of the Bible. Since you have rejected God I do not see if you are able to understand the teachings of Scripture. The Bible is God's love letter to His blood bought children-God Bless
from glorycloud :
Thanks for the note-I think you are asking me it seems that America or the world in general has not experienced any divine judgments due to breaking God's Law-for example the sin of homosexuality "same sex marriage"-I personally see all around me the judgments of God-for example we meaning parts of America are undergoing the worse droughts in over a 100 years-we see all around us lawlessness-for example homosexuality-God has given up people to a reprobate mind-divine judgment is seen in God withholding wise and righteous Government leaders-I also see God's judgment in American Christianity-the biblical gospel is no longer being preached in most churches today-I recommend you read for example in the New Testament 2 Timothy 3:1-9. The Bible has many themes and one of those themes is the theme of Family-marriage-a godly family or biblical view of marriage is a man marrying a woman Not same sex marriage-when we have a large portion of people living in homosexuality that is a sign that our culture has become morally rotten-which an evidence that God has given people over the slavery of their lusts-it is God who holds in check the sinfulness of manking-when God withholds His restraining hand that is a sign of divine judgment-well more could be written but I think you get my drift-God bless
from degausser :
It's so much easier.
from degausser :
It's so bewildering. I started posting less frequently sometime during the second half of 2008. By 2010 I think I posted 3 entries for the entire year. Now that I'm looking around at other diaries, I keep seeing last entries in 2008-2009. Maybe it is Facebook�.since people make the tragic mistake of treating that like a diary. Maybe Diaryland is like the Myspace of blog sites, and everyone has moved on to hip things like Livejournal (is Livejournal still cool or is that too obsolete? I�m really out of touch). Maybe Andrew started sending everyone hate mail, I just don�t know. I do know that it�s sad. I wish I had kept in contact with a lot of writers. I was hoping I would come back and everyone would be right where I left them. No such luck! Now I�m going to have to search for more internet friends�what a chore. It�s like when a relationship ends and you aren�t 100% sure what went wrong � did they meet someone better? Was the spark gone? Are you just not in the same place anymore? And it�s not that big of a deal, but it�s still sad, and you know that you can easily go out and find someone new, but then you think, �But they already know what I like in bed and how I take my coffee, and I�m not quite sure how much effort I�m really willing to put into this.�
from jarofporter :
you want irony? the sad thing is, my "best post ever", isn't mine... check tomorrow's entry.
from stepfordtart :
Hahaha! That would tighten your nuts, fersure! s x
from stepfordtart :
Your wife's hands look like my hands. Equally capable whether wielding a wrench or dispensing a handjob. Yay for NewWifey(TM), she totally rocks. s x
from her-story :
That was some batch of potatoes. Geez man, perhaps you should start cooking for the army. The ENTIRE army. You do realize she makes a great husband and you are a skirt. :P Oh, and when I need a DS fix, I tune in and listen. How goes it?
from annanotbob2 :
thanks xxx
from annanotbob2 :
ha ha - there's Stepfie beating me to it with the Le Creuset envy - took the words right out of my mouth! I have the red one in the middle but yearn for the low orange one on the left. Thanks for your comments - I had something else to say, but have been distracted by Stepfie so will fuck off x
from stepfordtart :
A soapy tit-wank from a stroppy cow in the back of a lorry and you might just explode with English joy! s x
from stepfordtart :
We do say lorry. We dont say Dutch oven. A Dutch oven is like a tit-wank. But not a soapy one. Soapy tit-wank is one of my favourite things to say. I like LC but I find it very heavy once its actually full of food (or boiling water!). My motley collection of pots large and small (mostly large!) is testament I suppose to a lifetimes of family cooking. I have some MASSIVE pots. I could cook an armadillo (without folding it up). s x
from stepfordtart :
I have pot-envy. SOOOOOO much Le Creuset! (or Le Creuset-a-like). Either way it beats my giant unwieldy collection of mismatched old crocks. s x PS Mmmm, potato bread :-)
from portlypete :
BTW, looks like you got yourself a winner with New Wife (TM). Cower away, and keep cooking. I made Osso Buco tonight. it was Ok but now we can't afford to eat for a week.
from portlypete :
You are so right! Those little buggers didn't even leave a recommendation on Tripadvisor. Although at least one is over-staying its welcome (it's hard to say which since they all look equally cute and fluffy). But, then again, four of the blighters, on a spit, would make a tasty snack. Just sayin'!!!
from dangerspouse :
I passed!
from dangerspouse :
Testing.
from im2evil4u :
YO! Glad to see you are still up to your antics here. :)
from fifidellabon :
Oh,,I rail, but always with a smirk. Ned reminds me just as you have of the futility, and yes, language deffo is dictated by the usage. However, I can still mine it for humour! I think that sometimes I am just too affected by the zeitgeist. This new Age of Anti-intellectualism can be frustrating. But then, on the other hand, Intellectualism can be quite precious. Heal quickly...gotta get back to those activities, y'know!
from annanotbob2 :
I had a weird shoulder thing once, and after months of useless physio and other orthodox treatment I tried acupuncture which cured it AT ONCE! Glad you are able to type again x
from newschick :
i miss you! POST!
from her-story :
LOLLLL!!! That's funny and nasty all at the same time! Dammit man... you made me choke on my Swedish fish. *coughs*laughs*coughs*
from rockhound :
We have something similar - two bathrooms, literally about a quarter mile from our department. I kid you not - we're in a massive structure. When I was still trying to walk, I couldn't make the round trip in fifteen minutes, much less the 2-3 minutes tops you've got in radio. They recently did a remodel - and I'd like to throttle the stupid, lazy, worthless kids who can't even bother to pick up paper towels, much less anything else. Not all ladies' rooms are that bad. Unfortunately the younger the team, the less likely that anybody has a shred of respect for the territory.
from lanienaked :
i can't believe that they wouldn't put up a sign that says display, and you are way too brave to just cut the duck yourself. i definitely would've asked the server/hostess why the duck wasn't cut. also how could you greasy smelly food into your wife's purse?! I would've been so pissed! luckily that would never happen to me :)
from atwowaydream :
It's not really a true headache if it's alcohol-induced. That's the rules.
from narcissa :
right? i know. once i have the oatmeal/chocolate/cookie combination, it's hard to focus on anything else.
from bantenhut :
Wow! What a madhouse. So you can't just play a five minute song?
from atwowaydream :
Well, drinking's what caused the headache in the first place. And I just can't do that hair of the dog thing. In defense of ladies' bathrooms. . . there are some nasty chicks, just as there are some pig-frat guys. Basically, no woman wants to sit their ass on a public toilet.
from stepfordtart :
*snort*. As a teacher, I also understand the agony of the 14 second toilet break as I need to usher out one class and then sprint to the far end of the school where there are just 3 stalls for approx 60 female staff (!) and then get back to class before the next students get into the room and steal all my stuff/kill each other/wreck the room. Oh, and our Ladies Room is also disgusting - I have never caught anyone messing it up but it must be SOMEONE. Bleuurgh. s x
from galenred :
Oh thank you, friendly stranger, for your warm greeting out of nowhere it seems. The Ford Ranger is still running and always takes me those few places where I'm needed. Fake Mountain Dew is what I called the "store brand" if they had one, such as Mountain Breeze� at Safeway�, but I've stopped my constant consumption of carbonated concoctions, so it's mostly coffee and water now. I suspect that I've had caffeine in me for nearly my entire life, so I'm not about to quit it now, no sirree! :)
from stepfordtart :
crying with laughter - stellar entry, old boy! s x
from atwowaydream :
I'll be reading along for sure! Amazing how some of the best writers I've encountered on the internet are from Diaryland.
from newschick :
well the spring/summer goal is to grow our own food... i can't promise anything, given i've never even owned a plant, but hey. we can try right? i hear jersey tomatoes are quite the dish! we're going to start small...tomatoes, zuchini, peppers and herbs...and see what happens. woooo.
from newschick :
i'm not laughing AT you... i'm laughing at your humor! you're a laugh and a half.
from atwowaydream :
"I didn't want to take the last one and stiff the people behind me. People who might be armed. This is Jersey." - Wonderful entry, made me giggle and I'm more than happy with that. Ecstatic, even.
from newschick :
ballet was spectacular - review posted. and for the record i've never read an entry of yours without dying laughing. so fair play to you sir!
from rockhound :
Now now. Just because new wifey has maraschino eyes is no reason to serve her up on a buffet. I had peking duck several years ago. I remember it tasting like greasy, syrup-smeared cardboard. In my case, cardboard from which I was still spitting vertibrae and other bones for the next week. I was still a teenager and was with a group including some of my teachers. The teachers were stunned that when we finished, my napkin was grease-stained but still in one piece and folded neatly. And these were heavy restaurant fabric napkins, lol.
from her-story :
Um. I would've paid twice that you did just to watch you cut into a display duck. In PENNIES! lol Thanks for the laugh, DS.
from rockhound :
Two feet of snow? Amateurs. I grew up in northeastern Iowa and remember driving over the Minnesota border where the snow was well over my head. Sidewalks and streets were walled off. Nevermind that I live in the desert now, where a dusting of snow is a major event. By the way, your background pictures should be showing up again shortly. I keep forgetting to reload them when I make any changes to my sites, lol.
from unhealthyme :
i suppose i just haven't met a real man who can keep a diary... until now. :)
from lanienaked :
thank you, actually the day didn't end up so bad.
from englishsucks :
thanks for the note. no i've never heard of KT Tunstall. :)
from skinny--girl :
Hi. Thanks for the note. Did you follow my blog before? I am still (still) working on the novel. Almost done. (In the real way, not the oh-sure-I'm-writing-a-novel-it's-almost-done-way.)
from newschick :
my baby corgi (rip) was snuggles. current fella is guinness. i want to stick to the alcoholic beverages theme, and shy away from 50s-burnout stripper type. and i am far beyond getting publicly embarrassed about anything. i'd go for the MORE embarrassing name, just to make people uncomfortable! (methinks stout!)
from newschick :
queue is an english word. i'm typing in english. therefore: acceptable. and i never lived in hoboken (bar that one time i ran away from home and stayed with my stevens nerd friend from swimming in like 04), i just work there. when we moved here we lived in new brunswick for 2 months during my summer of funemployment, and then cranford. it's jolly. my next corgi will be named stout or whiskey. :D
from newschick :
ok ok not cold cuts...more the queues at the deli counter (is that PC?) that constantly make me laugh. you peeps take sandwiches seriously serious. anyway, we've a lovely stack o snow in cranford and it's gorgeous. the fella's building us a snowman. i will place the scarf on when it's all finished. did i tell u my childhood dog was a corgi? her name was snuggles and she was the best. i love my jack russell but the next pet will be a gorgeous red and white pudgy bruiser!
from degausser :
Anything done in the name of booze is automatically forgiven. Especially if you're snowed in like I am right now. In that case, it's encouraged. Thanks for stopping by!
from degausser :
You're so right. IT'S THE ROUGHAGE! Lack thereof, that is. No, in all seriousness, my relationship is wonderful. As for me and my funk, I am just at a place in my life where I'm trying to reconcile who I've always been and thought I would be, with who I currently am. And possibly, not enough roughage.
from degausser :
Hahaha! Danger, he's 42, not 82! And puh-leeze, I haven't been in the position to go dancing, do some Jagermeister, and head down to the Film Forum for a midnight Kurosawa retrospective on a work night in years, whereas my boyfriend is in a metal band. An age difference has yet to be a source of loneliness. :) Which is more than i can say for my brain.
from degausser :
Haha! Well technically I said I felt alone - not that I was lonely. So why do you think 42 would make me feel lonely?
from newschick :
you jersey peeps and your cold cuts...never seen such obsession!!! stay warm today! it's pissin snow here!
from degausser :
I'm 23. My boyfriend, however, is 42, so unfortunately I can't blame my ever angsty ponderings on the duncery of the average 23ish man-boy :) I'm afraid I am at the root of my problems. While my teenage years were full of hormone-fueled insanity, my 20s just seem to be increasingly perplexing. Thank god for Diaryland!
from stepfordtart :
I make my own bread about 70% of the time and agree that it just tastes MILES better. If I could find a home slicer like the ones they have in the bakery shops, so I could have nice even slices, I would never buy shop bread again. s x PS Mmmmmm Sauerkraut!
from bantenhut :
Hello, fellow wanderer! I am sorry to have not replied sooner. No comments on your blog, either? Yeah, I stopped paying for supergold--but I see your name is in bold when you post, but comments don't work? Well anywho, I've now read your entries on Vitamix, Animal Crossing (nice!), and now Sauerkraut bread. I had a bread making stint last year, it was a ton of fun. I did beer bread, wheat challah, and easy irish soda bread. Yum. :) Toodles, look forward to reading!
from newschick :
u crack me up... and im with the wifey on this one!!! hope you're feeling better.
from sharayah :
Hi, Saw your note to me. Who are u? Just surprised me. Don't think I know u personally? And yes, same old garbage.
from stepfordtart :
hahaha! EXCELLENT impala joke! s x
from stepfordtart :
BEYOND gross! (And very funny). s x
from rockhound :
Well darn. I'm sorry your cheap-imitation-wannabe blender went tits up, and you didn't even get to enjoy its position. I am lucky; I have a cheap-imitation-wannabe from the 70's, which is still a thousand times better than anything you can buy now. There are a few plastic pieces, but they are roughly the thickness of a tank and hold up accordingly. The thought might gross you out, but you could always check into an older used blender and run it through an industrial melt-it-down-in-order-to-sterilize-it cleaning process. These days you don't necessarily get what you pay for - if you know where to look and know how to clean the holy heck out of it.
from cybers1ut :
Yeah, I was pretty damn surprised, although why I'll never know. Thanks for the response!
from idontpretend :
Lmao, thanks for the advice. That's pretty much what I've been doing since April, for the most part. She keeps messaging me every couple of months trying to be friends or whatever. I'm so busy with school and everything, I figure there's no harm in talking to her. See if she's changed at all. To be honest, she has changed some. But I still don't trust her and she's not even attempting to make up for what she did. In the meantime, I'm def going to load up on some SWTOR. xD
from newschick :
ya the more i listen to them in the morning, the more i love it! they crack me up. :)
from newschick :
ah BOO. i suppose i'll pretend you're elvis duran or something. hahah. yeah he knows... he knows that when i go up to bed at 6pm, it's because i want to be alone. we're quite compatible...he could spend his life watching sport, and i could spend my life reading books. i'm happy that i'm married, but am also happy when the fella goes away on business for a few days. all i'll say is, he knew what he was getting into!
from newschick :
after reading your 9/11 entry, i have one thing to say: you are such a journalist. and i know because i too was (am?) of that breed. i was up for days after, waiting for the Next Big Thing. and, by the way, you've just GOT to tell me your name now, so i can radio-stalk you. :D
from dirtyboots :
Your country sounds very vibrant, and interesting, and varied. The way you write about it, I would like to visit it some time. Where I live, it's all basically the same wherever you go, plus there's only about 6 people in the whole nation. Condolences, man. This guy was an awesome character.
from newschick :
great, beautiful entry. i really appreciated it, and i'm sorry for your loss. barton sounds like a fantastic guy. :)
from cruel-irony :
What a touching tribute. Condolences to you both on your recent loss. Losing a parent is a singular loss and while it's terrible at any time, it can be particularly tough during the Holiday Season. My best to you both.
from stepfordtart :
A lovely lovely eulogy! And condolence on your loss. ((hug)) s x
from rockhound :
So THAT's what rattled the windows here in Arizona a few days ago. Go figure!! Glad to hear you got a much-deserved vacation out of the storm. But between your marathon at the office and your culinary explorations, you're going to be in trouble when it's time to go back to work. Or not - you could just go commando I guess. Because after your fire-ingestion fest it's a safe bet you wiped out the REST of those underwear.
from cruel-irony :
Thanks for dropping in. It's great to hear from you! Glad you made it through Storm Sandy. I'd love to hop the Capsaicin Express. I got the same issue when it comes to cooking; have to dial back the heat if I'm sharing with Mr. Irony.
from araquen :
Hey, thanks for reading. I think I find my old entries sad in a different sort of way because of how sheltered I was and how ridiculous I sound to myself now. I'm going to be starting up a new diary, methinks, and years from now I'm sure that one will be just as embarrassing.
from newschick :
i have the memory of a goldfish. i was confused because i posted a pic of my scones on twitter, and the same day, you mentioned scones. i was like...fair play. he tracked me down. haha. and here just because i have a journalism degree doesn't mean i actually used it! far from it...except maybe my ocd editing skills. :)
from newschick :
i meant twitter. ;) sorry, if you knew me in real life you'd learn my special lexicon. it takes time.;) i was just wondering how you knew about my scones, unless you followed me on twitter? care tell - have you discovered my true identity? :)
from newschick :
i see you've figured out who i am in real life. ;) keep it a secret! and no way, i'd never delete somebody who updates more than once every 3 years. ;) do you, by chance, follow me on the twits?
from bliss-sad :
I'd be more than happy to hand you a hot mug of cocoa and tuck you in with a belly full of fresh duck!!! Hahaha, thank you so much for commenting!
from englishsucks :
Thank you so much for your kind words. I was saying that I'm fat to Stephen's eyes - like I'm not tone enough even though Stephen has never told me that I'm fat or chubby for his taste. I just felt that way and I do have fucked up issues that I must work on which I am currently working on it. Finding positive things about myself everyday, learning to love myself better and adapt a different world - like you said life is too short to dwell on being bitter and depressed. Again thank you so much for the note. You're amazing. <3
from melodymetuka :
I just got a rice cooker. Middle daughter brought it back from China. I've had it two weeks and I can't live without my rice cooker! :-)
from sduckie :
Oh yes. I have a dairy allergy... if I eat too much cheese, it's too much for my system and my throat gets swollen!!
from stepfordtart :
Flatterer! 29 and 33 respectively, since you ask. And I take it the 'Ring of Fire' doesnt feature too highly in your post-prandial exploits, then? Over here its standard post-curry procedure (or at least is the stuff of urban legend!). Happy Eating! s x
from stepfordtart :
Haha! Glad to hear youre ok and fending for yourself with reasonable success. Would respectfully suggest you keep the toilet paper in the fridge for the next few days tho, huh? s x
from rockhound :
Glad to hear you escaped relatively unscathed. Here's hoping you finally made it home safe and stinky. From what Gina tells me, some parts of Jersey are still without power, but here's hoping at least you had potable water and a barbeque grill waiting for you when you arrived
from annanotbob2 :
Thanks for the add and the comments. dangerspouse is one of the great usernames. I notice people saying you don't write here often - are you hanging out elsewhere too?
from newschick :
LOL sorry bud, i've got precisely one vicodin left - it will be an empty bottle soon. pity things are so bad for this state right now... but yes, my experience remains positive, no matter how much sh*t i undertake on a daily basis riding NJ transit and PATH. ;) (remember, i came from ireland...NJ is a few notches up the ladder). :)
from newschick :
i hear you! my first storm up in NJ and boy was it a doozie. hope you get some rest and relaxation soon...and glad that your family is okay. :) much love.
from annanotbob2 :
Hiya - I saw your name somewhere today and then there you were in the updated box, so I read and I've added you. Glad you are safe on the studio floor (ah - you're Poolie's pal, aren't you?), loved the story about the others - suddenly it felt real. All the best
from rockhound :
Nicely done! And I noted the quick-aging trick with the pitchers, will definitely give that a try next time the situation is appropriate. It doesn't change the fact that I know almost nil about wines in general - other than that I take mine dry, keep the sweet crap away from me - but thanks to you I'm getting an edjumacation.
from hg88 :
Interesting to see you're still around 7 years later. I just got on to see if I could figure out how to download/archive my diary without repurchasing a gold account but I don't think that's gonna happen any time soon. We'll see. Hope life is treating you well. :)
from hcatty :
Always a great time reading your updates :) Miss ya, DangerSir.
from her-story :
Come to wordpress... the grass is greener there.
from her-story :
Omg... I haven't logged into this site in eons... but, I did it for you, DS. Only you. Now stop busting my crackers... :p.
from newschick :
one entry and i'm hooked. can't wait to read more! :)
from autumnrein :
Oh I actually went to NYC a couple years ago for Thanksgiving. I had the most spectacular time. The people were wonderful. The energy was amazing. And....I just love that place. I would love to move there, but I'm afraid it is a bit too expensive even for us upper middle class folk. But I want to visit again. There are many more things I want to do there. I shall add you to my buddy list. I look forward to reading more from your journal as well. Night.:-)-Andrea
from melodymetuka :
Thanks for a good laugh. :-)
from rockhound :
Damn. I keep forgetting there are still a few readable people hog-tied to Diaryland. Nice radio gig - and I can relate to the buggery story. Pulled an equally boneheaded moment on one of my shifts once, albeit not to dead air. Everyone was howling, myself included. I would catch up with you on IM but hotmail decided to disown me
from crackisbad :
Mine do. My mother is always giving them yogurt, which they love. I should amend that: dairy products, including milk. Cat's don't make noise when they fart, so unless it just smells bad, I don't know how successful you will be @ blaming them. Good luck, though!
from poolagirl :
Glad to see you are still doing what you love. It's so nice to see you back in the online journal orbit too!
from alethia :
Ain't it funny, watching someone with natural talent do a job? It's a beautiful thing to watch. Almost as beautiful as it is painful to watch someone who just...doesn't get it try to do the same job.
from autumnrein :
Actually, I really WAS surprisingly confident going in, but then it kind of went by the wayside when it came time to do the procedure.-lol So, you work in NYC?? I absolutely adore that city. Oh, and thanks...it's great and fun to be back!:-) -Andrea
from melodymetuka :
Thanks for the good thought, and, happy 11th anniversary!
from integrating :
Yeah, just talkin to myself.
from poolagirl :
Holy hoppin' momma! Are you back? Are you gonna stay on Diaryland? I need to know cuz I am in the process of clearing out the crap here, but I will keep my password active if you are going to stay.
from rockhound :
Long rime no talk! I hope you're feeling better and still creating gastronomical goodies. Preferably those you are aware of!
from nilliem :
You? Are *such* a guy!!! Happy Sunday, here's hoping you are getting enough sleep, and not too much food.
from rockhound :
Have you absconded for good? It's been a while since you committed your mayhem to words
from her-story :
Glad to see your status of asshole hasn't changed. :P
from nicim :
You never cease to make me laugh. To think we share this god-forsaken state.
from rockhound :
Awww you hopeless romantic you. You bought her almonds. I should email you and harass you with the latest on the dragonspiel. Trying to get a rewrite done so I can dump it onto Amazon and be done with it. Which means plugging countless holes in the plot. Given you're an expert at plugging holes... ;)
from hissandtell :
Oh, and the finger-cutting-off business could have rendered it quite the perfect Roald Dahl story too, wouldn't it? (Perhaps not so much "Man from the South" as "Asshole from Jersey".) x
from hissandtell :
You know, I thought this was going to pan out to be quite the perfect O Henry story -- and that it was going to end with your discovering that NewWifey had sold her finger (the one destined for the ring, of course) to be able to afford to buy you almonds. So it kind of goes without saying that I'm feeling just a tad let down. But hey, Happy Anniversary anyway, you kids! x
from rockhound :
No matter how much porn you watch, no matter what they do on film, searing your meat is meant to be restricted to filet mignon and other cuts you buy at the grocery store. Human (or near-human) body parts are not designed to be cooked. Use your oven mitt for goodness sake.
from portlypete :
You just have to realise that, when it comes to MEAT, size does matter to some. I sympathise with the chef though. Go veggy next time - and just enjoy the reactions.
from haloaskew :
MEAT! So glorious! Synopsis: Elaine - moron. You - overconfident un-nimbled meat wad cooker. P.S. Stop smoking crack.
from nilliem :
well damn, that was a much needed belly laugh. I really could *see* you with the pan bouncing off you, and the flying meat...and the corgi, hehe. Happy Friday....
from cocoabean :
I'm sure the Corgi enjoyed it!
from wendyloo :
So yeah after years being away, I returned to check out something and saw on my favorites list that you were one of the few that had actually written in the last three months. Glad to see you're still up to your old tricks.
from rockhound :
Swing by my new place online and give me your thoughts on something, will you please?
from her-story :
Perhaps the bears had already SEEN you golf... and were trying to spare you hurt feelings. :) Welcome back. And, btw, if you didn't NOTICE (and since you're a guy, I know you didn't)... you are still linked to my blog. So tar-har. Welcome back, sorta... kinda. :)
from rockhound :
Gee - I basically NEVER visit here any more because the good writers have all absconded to other corners of the ether. Well, either that or have absconded somewhere. It never occurred to me that you might sober up enough to complete and post an entire entry. No, not fully sober of course. That would be a true aberration. But enough. Hmph.
from portlypete :
Thanks for the note, which had me in stitches (18 to be exact) - I keeled over over laughing and toppled through a window. Did you guess I was making that up? Anyway, the tale of your feisty missus certainly cheered me up. I've had dealings with a couple of colleens - never a dull moment! Haven't met a family of bears close up though. Just a singleton in Canada, and there were several snappy-happy tourists between me and 300 pounds of potential violence, so I felt relatively safe. In a straight contest between Bruno and a Big Bertha, who would win I wonder? Still earning a crust occasionally - thanks for asking.
from portlypete :
I feel for the corgi.: I really do. I work from time to time, on a freelance basis, but TBH, I turn down anything which I feel might be less than "fun". Life is waaay too short. Unfortunately, I learnt that particular lesson waaay too late. Thanks for an entertaining message.
from hissandtell :
For some reason, I am reminded of my Political Science classes in my first year at university. Instead of attending my Comparative Political Ideologies lecture, I nipped out for a couple of hours to watch a tennis match. (Well, to be fair, it was the Australian Open. And Guillermo Vilas was playing. And I WAS feeling rather lucky...) Anyway, that day's lecture was on Communism. And wouldn't you know it? I missed it. And no matter how I tried, I never could recover any semblance of working class cred after that. And, sadly, I still don't know anything about Communism. Can you explain it to me in your next diary entry please? Don't leave out ANYTHING. (Oh, and I never did get to meet Guillermo, either. His loss. But I did have a very nice chat to Vitas Gerulaitis in a laundromat a few days later. He was washing his socks, I think. Or maybe I was washing mine. Anyway, the important thing here is that socks were being washed.) Love, R xxx
from rockhound :
What a touching tribute to a defining moment in history. Only you could miss it - twice.
from batten :
Where the hell are you? You never write anymore and you need to... You are missed. Golf? WTF? srsly? sigh.
from jcelyn :
Holy crap, it's about time! It's been so long since you posted that I forgot how to log onto Diaryland...ah well, half a Dangerspouse yarn is better than nothing.
from rockhound :
I missed your return opus, it seems. Or perhaps I was just fashionably late. I'm still puttering around under various names. You've found my current site on Wordpress. When will you be making the jump?
from her-story :
You're back, eh? Interesting... So, if you're going to BE Tiger, then at least try to beat his mistress-count. Good to see you back, again, DS.
from hcatty :
Oh Dangersouse... *chuckle* ...the cleverness that is you...
from shortst101 :
Hey there! Nice to see you here! You need to get out more often :)
from poolagirl :
So....are you back for real or is this another yearly tease? You fox! Had me laughing until I fell out of my chair again!
from awittykitty :
"Golf makes you impotent..." Hasn't Tiger and his passel of expensive hookers taught you anything, Dangerspouse? Tsk.
from misspinkkate :
Heh, the 6 Line. The last crazy lady I talked to was on the 6 Line. One second she was asking me for directions, the next, she was telling me that John Liu is a secret Communist from China and I better start telling all the blogs and stuff.
from hissandtell :
So let me get this straight: a Welsh Corgi relocated to the wilds of New Jersey has an Irish first name and a (surrealistic) Belgian surname? No wonder he's confused. (Or was that a bastadised mis-translation on Ellis Island, and it was originally McGreet?) Oh, you crazy Americans! Love, R xxx
from nilliem :
HEY!! You are alive!! I know all about clawing up ladders (not personally, I watched and decided it was too much b/s for me!) and the time and effort and butt kissing it takes. And yeah, golf. ::shudders:: Soooo....do any of the stations you are on stream on the web? I've never heard your voice, and I'm curious...no, I'm damned nosy. Drop me a note: [email protected]. And have a marvelous holiday season, however you choose to celebrate!
from moosehunter :
I'm guessing you never check this these days, DS, but just lettin' you know that some of us still occasionally check to see if you've posted crazyness. Cheers, Moosey.
from poolagirl :
Jeeeze! You actually dropped in to say hello! I am.....flattered!
from hcatty :
...*sigh*... what a sad waste of all that lovely planning. Hope your Christmas turns out far better ;)
from warcrygirl :
I love a man who knows how to really flip the bird! Bird...blowjob...it's all good, right?
from awittykitty :
You forget to say whether you're wearing any clothes when you flip the bird. Ha! Just kidding. Sorry those bastards ruined your Turkey Day. That totally sucks. Hope you were able to make it up somehow over the weekend, since it sounds really delicious. :-)
from hissandtell :
Well, I guess that makes NewWifey(tm) the Head Gobbler in your house this Thanksgiving. Love, R xxx
from ship-jumper :
Happy TDay to you! So sorry you had to go into work. But when can I come over for that belated turkey feast? My GAWD it sounds soooooo good! I swear if you were a woman I would have to think about having an affair. I've done the brine salt soaking, and it really is amazing. Never flipped the bird on its sides though. Going to have to try that next time!
from lumenatrix :
A dangerspouse entry! It's a Thanksgiving Miracle! Well, enjoy your day as much as you can and spend any off air time preparing sweet revenge against the evil minion who ruined the best turkey ever. I hope you and New Wifey are well and happy. :)
from brightopal :
Darn. So the Thanksgiving turkeys aren't all consigned to the oven, I see. Some of them work in large-market radio. I hope he's properly roasted before it's all said and done.
from theratqueen :
So, what delightful plans of revenge are in the works for your errant *sick* fill-in? Personally, I'd string him/her up by the toes and proceed to prepare him/her as you would have prepared your turkey. But that's just me.
from im2qt2kr :
An entry from "dangerspouse" just made my Thanksgiving complete. Happy Gobble Day my friend.
from hcatty :
... so what ever happened to the cup of air? DUDE! We missed you! Do you realize that your previous entry was FEBRUARY SECOND? And this one was OCTOBER FIRST? ... That's like... *counting on fingers*... nine months! I could've had a BABY, man!!!
from warcrygirl :
Good lord, I'm surprised you didn't end up typing your blog entry lllliiiikkkkkeeee ttttthhhhhiiiiisssss.
from hissandtell :
Oops, that would be with a SOCK stuffed in his mouth, not a SICK. (Which, of course, is a teensy Freudian slip for, "You fucking bastard! You've ruined my whole life!") x
from hissandtell :
It's ALIVE! Hey, pantless and alive -- AND with a sick stuffed in his mouth -- oh, swoon! My favourite kind of man! Love, R xxx
from shortst101 :
Hey Hey, it was great to see your name lit up here when I logged in today. Glad to know you are still your usual crazy self. Miss our morning chats.
from brightopal :
You almost had me - until you mentioned "tea" and "sugar" in the same context. Like you, I have a well-nourished loathing for coffee, preferring tea. But only a philistine would mix sugar with tea. Then again, I might ultimately forgive you, since you didn't technically mix them...
from ship-jumper :
Oh my gawd, my favourite perverted hunk beauty is back!! I've missed you!! Thank god for sugar water to get you to post again! Stay strange, but don't be a stranger. Mwah!! Shippie (bucket)
from fifidellabon :
Whoooaaahhhh! Duuuuuude! XOFifi
from awittykitty :
You do realize that we're waiting for the photos now, don't you. And don'tcha think the Menudo thing is a little gay? Just saying....
from poolagirl :
It's about time you showed up, you big goofus! And just for you, I will make sure I stock the MEGA rolls of toilet paper. Just in case you come visit me.
from brightopal :
I'm realizing that your last entry was JANUARY. It's now AUGUST. DUDE. You're really falling down on the job. I'll go kick your butt on the other site since I know you're not reading here :-p
from ship-jumper :
WOW. What a great entry...but a horrific experience!! I did almost pee my pants when I read that NewWifey's vagina bit you!!! Only you my friend, only you! buckey
from nogooddaddy :
Me: (Driving on the Parkway in blinding sunlight) You: (On the radio) It's hazy with a chance of afternoon sun Open a window and look outside you fuck
from cosmicrayola :
Wow, I almost missed this. It is now 02/17 and Somehow your name came off my buddie list. I must have given up on you the last time I cleaned out the list. No problem, I'll put you back now. Wow, that entry reminded me of another one where your NEW WIFEY (TM) had to come the the rescue of the dog. I thinkk she had to use pliers then too. Glad to hear you're alive!
from hcatty :
Ooh! One more thing. Sorry about the multiple messages lol but you have... like... a TON of music, right? All kinds of stuff. Ever heard of BeeCake? They're from Scotland, and they've got some pretty awesome music. If you do know them, great, if you don't. DUDE. Look 'em up.
from hcatty :
Awww. You're just absolutely precious! (Don't worry. I won't tell a soul.) You don't have to knock off the ... ya know... stuff. It's part of your charm lol. You liked the video, huh? I WAS a little worried that my singing would come across... I dunno... chipmunk-ish. Teehee.
from hcatty :
It's the darnedest (is that how you spell it??) thing. You tell a story, and I actually SEE it playing out in my head. Every minute detail... except the sex parts. Like those smutty romance novels I read, I just skim through the sex parts... What was I saying?? Oh yeah! You shoulda kept the bunny and made stew LOL It was a GIFT from Gloria!
from hissandtell :
Hmmm ... for some reason, I'm reminded of the words of wisdom a sage old bloke used to give my husband when J was a callow young swain courting his cute little girlfriends: "You start off thinking you can eat it; if you're not careful it ends up eating you." (Mind you, this same wise old bloke also used to regularly trap J deep down in the bowels of engine compartments of the heavy earthmoving machinery they were fixing together and inflict long-winded raucous alcohol-binge farts on him too, so perhaps there's not necessarily something in that for all of us. Although you're possibly very fortunate that neither the bunny NOR NewWifey(tm) have taken THAT particular little leaf out of his book of wisdom [I assume].) Love, R xxx
from warcrygirl :
I forgot about your notes dude; I tried to leave you a message at your guestbook and it didn't work. At least she didn't boil the rabbit, that would be freaky.
from nogooddaddy :
Fuck, dude...you're right on for the way NJ looks. Could the weather up here have been any bleaker this week? The rabbit part made me nearly choke. I'll have to tune you in tomorrow on the way to work. Still where you used to be I assume?
from shortst101 :
always love seeing your name lit up saying you have put an entry here. Yes, I still read even if I don't write. Hugsssssssssss
from brightopal :
You know, it COULD be that the kamikaze avian was in fact aiming for you, merely retreating to regroup and make another attempt. After all, you do seem to have a way with birds. Witness the Vulture Incident of a while back. I'm just sayin'
from wench77 :
Thanks for the note! oooo! a new post! I'll have to find time to come and read it. An email? Dang, I am sure I have your addy around somewhere. All is fine, though a bit hectic, with the kiddo, snow and icepellet falls, doggie, trying to fit in some work. maybe take down the xmas tree... ;D hugs to you and the wifey!
from nilliem :
Ouch. That's all I got today! Hope all is well (other than the obvious) with you and yours!
from her-story :
Well, at least SOMEWHERE in New Jersey shit is happening. I'm bored with N.W. Jersey... wanna trade? And, uh, I hate to say it, but... that's what you get for walking your cat. *grins* Glad to see you survived...
from awittykitty :
oh my God. That's like an episode on "Animal Planet Gone Wrong", as hosted by Christopher Walken or something. I am so glad Gloria was ok. You? You can heal. But kitty hor-douerves are irreversable.
from wench77 :
Dang, if I knew you were still writing entries, I'd visit Diaryland more often! Funny as hell, as usual. thanks! Happy new year to you and New Wifey. Hope her girl bits are doing better and she has a healthy year! Hi to your wonder dog too!
from fifidellabon :
Happy New year! /Fifi
from jcelyn :
Welcome back DP! It's so great that NewWifey is feisty as ever and a posting from you is like an early Christmas present. And I'm Jewish!
from nilliem :
damn, man....I'm crying/laughing here!! I need more!! Missed you...good to know you are breathing East Coast air, and bringing humor with you.
from shortst101 :
No matter how long it is between your stories, it still makes me laugh! Miss our chats in the morning. Merry Christmas!
from brightopal :
Welcome back to the Diaryland - about damned time, too! Glad to hear that NewWifey survived her repeat expedition up Mt. Surgery and is finally on the mend. I can only imagine how bad you felt to be so inconvenienced ;)
from awittykitty :
Hey, we have an Applefest up here too. And there's always mud up to your ass. I'll send you the date for next year. Truth is I just want to see your sexhay ass dressed in a garbage bag.
from haloaskew :
Why do I have a funny feeling Wifey KNEW VERY WELL it would rain that day? The flip-flops were a dead giveaway. HA!
from poolagirl :
Glad to see you are back in the saddle (the writing saddle - not so sure I want to know about the other saddles in which you perch things). Also glad you like apples and sewing. My boss is married to a woman who manages a fabric store. See, it could be worse!
from warcrygirl :
"Let's go" she said into my ass. I farted, she screamed, and we took off. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I love you, man. So, what kind of pies will you be making?
from hissandtell :
Hey, Thomas -- I was thinking about you ALL LAST NIGHT after J and I watched Part One of the (new for us) BBC series "Three Men in a Boat" where Griff Rhys-Jones, a mad Irishman called Dara, a cormorant-crazy chap called Rory and a nervous dog named Loli rather foolhardily attempt to recreate Mr Jerome's Edwardian idyll in a skiff. (And while I don't recall an encounter with David Gilmour in the original book, I daresay he might have been contemporaneous even then...) Love, R xxx
from lumenatrix :
Hey there Danger, just want to drop a note to say hi and that I hope you and New Wifey are ok.
from portia12 :
How are you and the wifey doing?
from poolagirl :
Ah shit! I didn't mean to write to you as the dogs. Complete your leap of faith and know it was me, okay?
from tuckandsophi :
I don't watch TV, DangerMan. Too busy being a pirate and updating Diaryland. Sorry about the North Korean thing. I just HATE when that happens!
from brightopal :
And finally we have the corroborating evidence to the killer-vulture adventure so many doubted before: http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070503/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_spain_vultures;_ylt=Ap3YKORbvkM0vfejmagY6GjtiBIF
from jcelyn :
I'm so happy to see a new post(who cares if it's polished)and to find out that New Wifey is doing OK. Booze and pills and government agents. Oh My!! ;)
from happyyet :
Um, the Virgina Tech shooting happened in VA... a Korean student was the gunman. Also, yeah, Korean women are totally hawt.
from nilliem :
Darlin'! Good to know you and yours are well. Now, if I could just watch the Chill's here....hehe. By the way, less long is ok...just be sure its girthy, k'????
from portia12 :
You had me laughing aloud a good few times. You're so bad. :D Sending get well wishes to New Wifey!
from nogooddaddy :
Welcome back, faggo
from amberstone :
Well there you are, stranger! Too funny on the story; lol! Dan and I were just yakking about you guys the other day, worried about New Wifey. Don't wait so long to update next time *scolds* ;) Oh and I'm blogging again too. Such as it is. :)
from chakra-chick :
Gawsh! I've missed you so much...unpolished entry or not-you're still the bestest! Good to hear that NewWifey is coming along well... ~smooches~
from awittykitty :
I always blame my pharmaceuticals for potentionally dangerous international events too. Glad New Wifey(tm) is on the mend.
from brightopal :
I'm the reincarnated Radiogurl. Long story of dumb moves that could outdo your escapades, even the vultures on steriods you encountered a couple of years back. Here's hoping NewWifey(tm) is back on her feet and semi-sober again soon. (I won't wish full sobriety on either of you. What's the fun of that???) Though the way I see it, Men In Black would make a great starting point for a script. Provided there was a writer in the family ;)
from sarkasmo :
I knew there was a reason I added you to Google Reader. "Just in case he updates," I told myself. "Just in case." Anyway, sending good healing thoughts to the missus for you. I had an aunt with colon issues a couple of years ago. I *so* wanted to get there before she woke up from surgery and stick a rainbow wig on her head. Maybe New Wifey(tm) would like that!
from her-story :
He lives? He LiVeS?!? HE LIIIIIIIIVES!!! (it sounds better when paired with the thundering music in my head) So, um... I thought you were talking about Harm (Jag?) I love em Harm. Yummers!
from xeroxjunkie :
Will you update already??
from beetilda :
Hmmmm, you haven't updated in 69 days. I'd say that's a nice place to start...divine even.
from nprmommy :
been out of the blogosphere for quite a while...hope new wifey is doing well...
from awittykitty :
How's NewWifey(tm) doing? Better I hope. Hope you're not doing anything too awfully dumb. Yours truly, witty.
from nogooddaddy :
Caught a traffic report this morning. Stop doing the weather...you told me is was cloudy. It was not. Then, after hearing your voice, I had to change my undies (blush)
from nogooddaddy :
Caught a traffic report this morning. Stop doing the weather...you told me is was cloudy. It was not. Then, after hearing your voice, I had to change my undies (blush)
from candoor :
news?
from foofarachi :
Hello Danger, I found the link to your diary through your profile in Delphi. In the last week, I have read it in its entirety. laundry all caught up!?-NO life?-enthralled?...you decide :*) I also joined Diaryland just so I could leave you this message. Many times in my life I have been touched by the benevolence of strangers and believe in passing it on. You now have at least one stranger keeping you and Dangerspouse in her thoughts and prayers. (((((((((((despised Delphi hugs)))))))))))))
from lumenatrix :
Hi Danger, I hope Wifey is doing well and that y'all had a happy, event free New Year.
from nixtress :
Happy New Year!!
from batten :
Oi Spouse! How's Wifey? Let us know, okay? Hope you managed to have a good Christmas. Here's hoping things will be better in the New Year. Big hug to you both. -J
from tuckandsophi :
Dang! Take care - both of you! I need you on my crew!
from nixtress :
Happy Holiday wishes to you and your wonderful Wifey. :)
from wickedcrazy :
I hope she's ok. I'll say a prayer. Cause you know that really works. People say "I'll pray for you" and honestly, they really do it, they're not just saying it to sound all caring and then God thinks "wow this is a person people pray for, I'd better help them" and then poof! you get all better. And unicorns come to your house to celebrate with presents full of elf dust and lollipops. Maybe I'll just hope for you then wait til you post a funny follow up about how everything is ok.
from accentjunkie :
I go into reculsive hiding and this is what I come back to? Sending warm thought directly toward New Wifey's hole. . .the dread colon cancer runs in my family - I wouldn't be surprised if the long camera of intense discomfort ends up in my future someday. Seriously though - thinking of you guys this holiday season. . . I'm sure all is well and you'll be the only one shoving anything up there in no time.
from hissandtell :
Geez, mate. Quel bummer. I don't suppose this could have been caused by the excess pressure of hanging all those claw hammers and wood chisels off her tool belt, in a vain attempt to partially obscure her authentic tradesman's crack? Please give the feisty (if not fisty) darling my best; I'm glad to hear she's being such a big strong non-wussy bloke about it all. Love, R xxx
from goingloopy :
Ass cancer isn't funny. But maybe you just went at the alternate entry a little hard post-laparoscopy and rearranged things. Maybe next time you should use more lube, and perhaps Barry White instead of Barry Manilow. Seriously, though, I hope everything's ok in DangerLand.
from wench77 :
Dang she's just about as bad as them kids who don't have pain receptors or whatever, and bang themselves up all the time. (hey I saw it on some Dr. TV show) wow. Um, dang, I am like um, jokeless. I am rather sitting here stunned by the nearloss of NewWifey... I am still stuck with her sitting on the sidewalk refusing to get medical care while she had popped ovaries. Stunned. Whack her over the head for me for that eh? Best of luck with the bowels. I hope you have a shitty Christmas, in all the correct and painless ways!
from haloaskew :
Didja hear the one about the Pope, the rabbi, and the colon? Um...no, wait. Here we go: So the colon walks up to bar...No, never mind. I'm all tapped out on colon jokes tonight, dude. But seriously, I'm sure it will turn out to be nothing more than a gerbil from her experimental days. Hell, it could be Lemiwinks! (Didja see that South Park episode?) Anyhoo, NewWifey probably just has some normal blockage. Nothing a power washer (with a nice vibe) can't fix. On the off-chance it's something more serious, she's tough as nails and you guys will get through this. Try not to worry. Easier said than done, I know, but you might as well worry about how you're gonna spend your lottery winnings while you're at it, right? Or her life insurance payout. OHHHHHHHH! I am evil. But there you go. Ha. hoo. At any rate, try to enjoy the holidays and not dwell. What's the point? She is going to be FINE. I don't know why I know it, but I do. I'm sending her all my well wishes. And to you, strength in those moments you need it the most. Keep us posted, bud. You know, there's a reason all these folks keep you on their buddy list, even though you don't post for months. We love ya, you make us laugh, and even though we've never met you, we care. {{{Hugs and kisses}}}} Holler if you need to talk, you hear?
from nogooddaddy :
Good luck dude. Are you still on 710? I never hear you anymore. What am I supposed to beat it to in the morning?
from nilliem :
Sending happy healthy thoughts your way. Lots and lots of them. Tell New Wifey this one: "What's all the fuss about endangered feces? That's outrageous. Why is feces endangered? How can you possibly run out of such a thing? And besides...who wants to save THAT, anyway? ~ Gilda Radner as Emily Litella http://home.earthlink.net/~tmwa/page7.html More on that page, heh
from sunshine0221 :
Crossing fingers and toes that NewWifey is just fine.
from beckers-j :
Wow, I'm so sorry. I hope everything turns out okay. I'd say that I'd keep you both in my prayers, but I'm not the praying type. So I will keep my fingers crossed. And my toes. I really, really hope it's nothing serious.
from shortst101 :
Hey, hope all will be okay with New Wifey. You can't live without her! Hugssssssss
from veralynn :
Damn, man!! Best of luck to new wifey. That sucks. As for humor as you wait for her next medical adventure, may I suggest the anal probe episode of South Park? ;)
from batten :
Oh hell... Hang in there, babe. You and New Wifey. We'll be thinking healthy thoughts her way. Keep us posted, okay? Big hug to you both. -J
from chakra-chick :
Glad you've finally decided to update...pity about NewWifeys' medical woes---hopefully this time it will also be OK. Best of luck...I'll be holding thumbs for you both.
from beetilda :
Hey, good luck to New Wifey(tm) and your fine self as well. Hey, at least you got to do the distillery tours! We did that this Spring, and Miss B has now an impressive collection of bungs. (Why does work suddenly spring to mind with that sentence?
from xat :
Dear heavens...though I suppose it'll curtail the depredations of the xmas blow-up lawn ornaments. I'll keep everything crossed, including my spleen, that it all turns out okay. **X
from joiedv :
Oh lordy, give her a big hug and kiss. I hope she is okay. Good luck.
from sarkasmo :
My aunt had colon cancer (and won) last January. After she came back from surgery, but before she woke up, we put a rainbow wig on her head. I'm not sure how funny she thought it was, but we all cracked up.
from ursamajor :
Best wishes for a non-cancerous ass...
from jcelyn :
Hope New Wifey is feeling better. Remind her to salute the Rear Admiral and don't tell her that I wound up with a dislocated shoulder when I had a colonoscopy. Or maybe you should...it's funny as long as it's happening to someone else! Take care of yourself, too. OK?
from outfoxed :
Good lord man, you're sending bits of your N'Wy off via UPS ground?? I showed this to my wife and got an immediate dispensation, two kitchen passes and a $50 bill to spend at the hooter joint. I'm perfectly willing to ship a new-in-box (Fed-Ex, next day) Milwaukee Hole-Hawg to her if she'll promise to dress you in brown shorts and carry a towel in your hip pocket for the next 6 weeks. And yeah, she'll know what a Hole-Hawg is, and she'll by God want one. Send shipping instructions stat, man in brown truck.
from warcrygirl :
Oh sweet jaysus! Hope NewWifey is back to normal soon (normal being a relative term, mind you). Hey, at least her testicles didn't swell up to the size of tennis balls! Not that I have testicles but I know someone who does. Much love and wooden nipples!
from nixtress :
Ack! I suppose that's a very good reason, indeed, to be gone so long. Big hugs to both of you.
from awittykitty :
Sorry to hear about all the medical mayhem for wifey(tm). This may fall under the bad joke category, but since its you Dangerspouse... The last time I had a colonoscopy, the nurse later told me that while they were doing the procedure and I was about 75% knocked out, I was rambling on and on about how I wanted them to do a reality show called "This is witty's asshole". Anyhoo, fingers crossed for good news.
from radiogurl :
Good grief. There's the one about the old man whose colon ruptured. When he told the doc about it, the doc said he was full of shit...
from lumenatrix :
Hey there dangerboy, just wanted to wish you a happy (late) Thanksgiving! I hope all is well in Dangerhouse and that your feast went off without a hitch... for once. :)
from nixtress :
Have a great Thanksgiving!! We miss your updates :(
from chakra-chick :
Tom, where are you hiding? I miss you man!
from sixxgunn :
Dude.. you're fuckin' funny. Thanks for the laughs!
from moosehunter :
Heya DS. Sad though it is, I keep updating too regularly to be very insteresting, but I'm starting to get to the point where I don't look up to see if you've written anymore... Half of Yorkshire's waiting on your next episode matey, and I notice an awful lot of 'where are you' notes here too. Have Casey the Wonder Corgi and NewWifey TM finally decided they didn't need you any more and buried you under the patio? If that's the case, don't answer me... Moosey
from sparklybecca :
Hi, 0069! Long time no read. After my depressingly short stint in a relationship, I pulled my covers up over my head. I think I can face the light of day again without falling back into the pit. Hope life is treating u and wifey well. Ta ta for now.
from natek9 :
Hey Danger... I haven't seen a column from you in ages. What happened.. did your typewriter break?
from mnlady1962 :
Come back!! Your life can't possibly be as boring as MINE and I still manage to update everyday. So, give us a break here!!!!
from shortst101 :
Ok, so what's happened to you?
from her-story :
Ah hem... que es DANGERSPOUSE, eh?
from moosehunter :
Almost a month since my last Dangerfix!!! I'm going cold turkey man and starting to shake. What's going on in the world of DS at the moment then? Moosey
from mehiel :
Hey, I locked up. If you're curious, the username is "mata," the password is "hari."
from mrscoble :
The question that's really on my mind: Who did Babs pay for your boob job? I want some sexy titties like that for myself.
from tuckandsophi :
We are flying out to visit Casey. Please chain yourself in the yard.
from nmnohr :
That was the most genuine comment that I think you've ever left. I do appreciate the fact that you still got the cheap beer comment in there though. Thanks for the comment, it was really genuine. Are you feeling ok? Heh, kidding. How've you been?
from candoor :
I love you cuz I have to make everything ok, or something like that... sure, you add me and I shrink up like a scrotum in an ice bath, but I am basking in the glory of being added you your illustrious list, really I am... and soon there'll be a dozen or two entries dedicated to you, or at least a few dozen entries that have been waiting for me to have time to upload cuz, for better or worse, I do still write almost every day... and you, you don't even have to write, you get people who hate you to write entries for you... that is talent... well, I hope you enjoy your good fortune and keep your balls in the air...
from veralynn :
You'll never get the Sesame Place gig now. Not unless you're willing to dress up as Big Bird. (I know, not again!)
from hcatty :
.... so did she have a hand in the culinary expertise or was that natural talent? ;)
from skinnylizzie :
Well hello there again! Yeah, sorry about the babble, it's still a sore point...I would indeed still bite his bottom because I'm a sucker for a hot man..oh God, now I have bottom biting on the brain again...
from realsnoopy :
Boredom! Hey, how did you find me. i don't think we share any readers??/
from mnlady1962 :
Babs is my hero!
from awittykitty :
Why did I momentarily cringe when I saw the name "Babs" and the word "stalker"? Guilty conscience I guess. I do think you owe "Babs" a little Dangerspousian nooner though. wink, wink.
from twoozin8tor :
Ha! The greatest piece of non-fiction I've ever read!! Bravo, Babs! [and when I think of all the shit you give me about my stammering... I should kick your well-picked ass, Zitface. *kiss kiss*
from outfoxed :
Sherpa-T sounds like the night DJ at the Bodishatva Lounge.
from radiogurl :
You know, the world owes Babs something for her hand in the creation of the Dangerspouse juggernaut. Maybe a scotch. Maybe a firing squad. We'll let her know.
from poolagirl :
There is an awfully long line of people who want you to be their next science project. I just cleaned out my refrigerator so I guess I have that one out of my system.
from oktoberfest :
I'm beginning to think you may be right about the yogurt sweet things. I'm seriously considering the merits of just eating them all in one 10 minute binge and then they're gone. Kind of like being bulimic but without the throwing up bit. Hmm. So not like being bulimic at all then. But yeah... thanks for stopping by!
from outfoxed :
I checked, and clicked, and my guestbook worketh just dandy, slim. I'd make a naked sugestion that you check your clicker-device du joir, but nekked and y'all are items best left for winter blogging. We like perky down here, yass'um, we do. But thanks for the congrats, and as a recent grampy, I'll have you know it feels just sizzling to have one hoof in the grave and another jammed in amongst my molars. Best, O'Foxed.
from geek-betty :
Thank you! I'd have to say that havingan actual motorcycle enthusiast that liked my story is a pretty big compliment!
from zencelt :
Bwahahaha! I may need that one day, when they hang down to my knees at 60ish...
from hissandtell :
You know, NewWifey(tm) might be on to something here. Have you considered selling life-sized photographs of yourself in full piratey mode to your devoted readers, so that we literary groupie-types might hold them over the faces of our paramours to fulfill our own (admittedly warped, possibly) little fantasies for 42-and-a-half-minutes or so? Love, R xxx
from zencelt :
Hey Asshole, let me clear something up. I will never conform to the Hollywood standard of thinness because it grosses me the hell out, and I enjoy my boobs too much to lose them. I just need to lose enough to reduce my blood pressure, ease up on the arthritis and stop waddling (kidding... a Zen never waddles), and eat healthy enough to lose the cholesterol meds. Thank you for caring though... Oh, and my dog would look damned cute in a roller skate.
from throat-smack :
I suck, what with my visible html. Dammit.
from throat-smack :
It's ok dear. Sometiems we all fall a little short. <p>...<p>Zing!
from chakra-chick :
Oh Tom darling...I would never lock you out on purpose! All you had to do was ask for the keys to unlock...I would gladly give it to you...
from mizlizzy :
Thanks for the encouraging note! I am officially a dangerspouse fan after reading your entries for over 2 hours now and several times laughing so hard that I sprayed Dr. Pepper on my keyboard... Thanks! :-)
from candoor :
ain't too proud to applaud you neither :)
from jcelyn :
Great to have you back...you were missed!
from zencelt :
Oh God, I just fell off my chair. Thanks for the note, and the belly laugh!
from acaldwell :
i knew that!! hehehe!!! as far as howard goes he can &*(&(*&&@@!!!! hisself!! i like imus, but im wierd like that! hava jolly roger weekend!!
from acaldwell :
im surprised that you dont know imus is on and in your own market!! WFAN!!! and whats wrong with imus? i betcha never have even listened!! nice pic of famous new wifey (TM) btw!! and FYI, i dont wear sneakers when i use the litterbox, thanky yous!!!
from veralynn :
Hee at $6 a pop, it'd suck me dry having a pina colada vacation of any duration. ;-) hee The cabins were EXCELLENT. There are a whole variety of them in various places in PA at varying sizes and levels of "rustic." Mine was the bare minimum and I just loved it. Plus: uber-cheap!
from wickedcrazy :
That was brilliant! Your wife is my new idol. Instead of trying to be sneaky and going reverse cowgirl so I can see the poster of Paul Newman as cool hand luke on my wall, I'm just going to lay the damn thing over T's face. To hell with subtlety.
from cosmicrayola :
Ok, I was born. I did shit. I am still alive. There. I saved you the trouble and a few bucks. That's about as annotated as it gets. And for the record, when I see your name pop up, I think of a ham. hehe.
from pinkytusk :
Nice to have you back.. PinkyT
from amberstone :
Hilarious, DS! I love reading you. :-)
from teacherlady2 :
Okay, the guestbook didn't work for me. This is what I tried to post: Your answer, while apparently requiring serious thought, smacks of jealousy, my dear dangerman. After all, my dog doesn't need a cookbook to get "lucky." Oh, what's that? That's right, it's the sound of my dog winning again.
from cosmicrayola :
Remind me not to invite you to MY book signing. So, your not going to buy my book, huh? At least you would have a different picture to look at. I think I'm cuter than the bacon.
from misspinkkate :
No kidding- god forbid we turn the lights off on the Empire State building, so people in Queens can EAT AND SHOWER. Now they're saying it might be MONDAY before everyone gets power back. And think of how long it'll take everyone to replace their food, figure out what electricals are broken, etc. What a mess, ConEdison!
from poolagirl :
Yes, your guestbook sucketh, but that's why you have your notes turned on too. Hey guy, thanks for your hilarious entry (as usual) AND your big shout. You are (how shall I say this....) a real sweetie pie.
from her-story :
OK... listen, I don't care about my goddamn dignity or my intellectual lack of internet saavy. Your goddamn guestbook won't let me post. Kick it or something! And, well, the SMOKE from the mountains didn't hit me YET silly because we aren't leaving til tomorrow...
from moosehunter :
DS, long time no hear, but the same for me too. If it's any consolation re: the hair, while at university, I got kind of Gothy for a while (no lace or white face paint or any of that shit, but into the music) and tried to dye my hair black. Sounds like you succeeded, however shiny. My hair turned one slight shade darker brown, but I turned my face, hands and bathroom blue! Also, a friend who was a German through and through and had blond hair tried to dye it black and his went a sort of sickly hospital-patient green for a month. Ah the heady days of hair colouring. Now I just let it go grey gracefully. What's the weather like in Dangerland at the mo? Here it's goddamn hot! Moosehunter
from radiogurl :
Hey, babe, I hope you kept that book around. We could substitute for the paper bag, ya know? How ever, black patent leather hair doesn't faze me. I've been married to a man from Arkansas.
from her-story :
Your goddamn guestbook sucks monkey teets. Fix it, will ya? I can only rewrite my post three times before I give up. This will be three. And, I extended it past ONE time for you because you FINALLY posted something (irony #1: I leave you a message and you respond. Me thinks you are a trained circus monkey.) Ok... First of all, "experienced" virgins? Dude, what planet are you on? Second, Poolie slapped you with a fresh carp by calling you one UGLY pirate on her video (hehe... go poolie go poolie) and that's the making of a severe Jerry Springer moment (though, I think you have to be related, sleeping together, and slapping each other with shit first before being even remotely considered for a spot on his show... if its still on the air... *shrugs*) Third... this is a combo-one. Dyed black hair on a Sicilian... and it didn't MATCH? What part of Sicily is your family from? Grecian formula?? And, I don't blame the wife for nearly mounting Tyler Florence. He's cute... AND can cook... and, say, if he wants to come show me how to cook at MY house... he'd get red carpet treatment... and probably my father gushing and diving over shit to shake his hand... I guess what I mean to say is that if my dad was a woman, he'd want to mount Tyler Florence as well. Good to hear from you again... its been a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time coming!
from xeroxjunkie :
Holy shit. He rides again.
from awittykitty :
You're so easy, Dangerspouse. So, so easy. signed another Irish girl who likes easy Italians.
from warcrygirl :
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! OMG, here I am laughing my ass off, making the very sound I've typed out in all caps, trying to explain to my kids why I'm laughing. Usually me just saying "Funny words" makes them leave me alone as the oldest isn't the best reader and The Captain can't read at all yet. I can't let Hubby read this or he'll start coming home from work with 8 x 10 glossies of the Weasley Twins...
from danddteacher :
Have we lost you?
from nprmommy :
danger, danger, wherefore art thou, danger?
from nicim :
note from Arc-Angel666 in my diary. don't know if you heard yet. XXOO N
from shortst101 :
Just dropping in to say hello to my favorite morning radio personality. Well, you would be my favorite if I ever heard you on the radio. Ummmm, well okay how about your my favorite diaryland radio personality.
from hsiutime :
Hello! Sorry I didn't respond earlier; haven't checked my notes page in a while. Trust me, I was terrified it was Bird Flu as well, but luckily it has passed and I am still alive. There is dental insurance in Japan - I guess the process of getting to the denist and trying to explain around the language barrier is what puts me off the whole thing. Anyway, you have a very nice diary. Next time I'm in New York, I'll think of you reading the weather AND traffic. Oooh...
from candoor :
you are such a lucky SOB... of course you have paid your dues and deserve every bit of the goodness you get, but still, lots of people have paid their dues in many ways and haven't put themselves in the right place at the right time... and no wonder I'm not onn your buddy list, what with hissy being every other listing or so... but then, she deserves it too, being she's paid her dues and is one lucky DOB... wishing you many luxury filled retreats from the daily whippings... I prefer NCAA college football, myself :)
from radiogurl :
Hey almost-as-ugly-as-me, someone posted on your forum, saying put up or shut up. You want to leave the forum as is, or kill it?
from atoutlemonde :
Thank you. Here's hoping.
from mehiel :
Wedding photos are up!
from mrscoble :
Well, I think I've just proven the theory that you might be a weenie. I never said I hated you. You just broke my wee little heart is all. It's okay, because it's small and mostly cold. Buck up, big man. Surely all of your maleness wasn't wasted on farming body hair.
from mehiel :
Also, thank you for that wonederful comment on my Catholicism entry. It took a long time to write, and reading your comment made me feel validated in having expended so much effort.
from mehiel :
Hey, you can now officially test the "hot bride" theory. The dress has arrived and photos are up!
from nprmommy :
you must have been drunk when you wrote that.....
from nprmommy :
dear, sweet, naive dangerspouse.....it is SO obvious you have no children....i'll invite you to my house, and you can work two part-time jobs, clean the house, do laundry, make meals, drive the kids to and from school, and then between 3:30 and 8:30 help with homework and guitar lessons, drop one child off at practice, then drop the other child across town at his practice, then drive back to pick up the first child from practice, then drive back across town to pick up the second child from practice, go home and fit in the last of the homework, dinner, and baths. can i pencil you in for next wednesday?
from mrscoble :
That's it. It's like you took my copies of all my Kevin Smith movies and just PISSED on them. I'm going to go cry and eat a half gallon of Blue Bunny vanilla ice cream, and hope you were just joking, and that you'll apologize in the morning. What a horrible, horrible way to end what I thought would be a perfect day. You're a terrible old man, and you made a sweet little girl cry. I hope you're happy now!
from veralynn :
It wasn't GIVING one I missed...it was GETTING one! :-)
from ursamajor :
Illusion? Lies, I say! You just blew so MANY of my long-held beliefs. I bet my local traffic guy in the helicopter isn't really even in a helicopter, is he? IS HE?!
from beckers-j :
Geeeez, I don't think I'd be able to bite my tongue after taking an on-air beating like that. Then again, I don't know what your paycheck looks like. ;) Also, do you ever watch that horrible Sam Champion - the CopperTone baby all grown up? He's the most annoying weather guy ever.
from danjerus :
. . . and now all you need to do is learn the difference between "comments" and "notes".
from moosehunter :
Well hey. I always thought weathermen made it up anyway. If I had a single shred of evidence that British meteorologists had ever done anything other than buy the Usborne Big Kids Book of Weather and then jammed a pin in it with their eyes closed I would be shocked. But since we once had a weatherman here who screwed up so much worse, your faux-pas is belittled by comparrison. Michael Fish received a phone call while on air on TV from a distraught housewife who'd heard a rumour that a hurricane was headed to the south of England. He reassured her that would not happen and a few hours later Britain was hit by a hurricane that caused millions of pounds of damage and was the worst we'd seen in nearly 4 centuries. You see. You got off lightly. Anyway, how's the weather now, and how's it going to be for the weekend? We're going to the Yorkshire Moors for the weekend... Moosey.
from warcrygirl :
Hey you, you won the button! Email me a mailing addy and I'll get it off to you this week. Congrats!
from katlitter :
hi! just found your message in my guestbook, which I check once every six months, on average. I have no idea how that guy made it to Central Park barefoot, but I do know this, we were having strawberry cheesecake ice cream that night! I will try not to leave out such scintillating details in the future! ...psst, what's the weather going to be like tomorrow?
from mehiel :
Comments? Where? :P At least you get paid handsomely for reading the same thing over and over. I hear that Bush's press secretary just got fired for doing exactly that.
from danddteacher :
Supposedly I have a good poker face - except I don't know how to play poker. But I must be a really convincing actor, because I'm always the one in the group who makes the inconceivable seem conceivable. I'm the one who makes people buy the lie. Go figure.
from nprmommy :
i always say the worst part of my job is announcing the weather....i want to just hang a dart board with various weather conditions on the wall, and shoot a few darts to come up with the forecast. it would probably be just as accurate. and our studio is in a basement with no windows. i tell my husband "if you hear me say 'mostly sunny,' and you look out the window and it's pouring rain-- call me and clue me in!
from acaldwell :
over here in the land o' morman, we have a weatherman who spends 20 minutes talking about rain and floods. he loves the snow and rain, and has a white blazer he wears when he wants it to snow the next day. well the next day it was 70!~! hahahaaa!!!
from ms-do :
A Whipping Boy you say?......evil grin..... Ok pick your switch boy!!
from yeahimadork :
How does one go about joining the Dangerspouse fan club? And do we get an autographed photo of you in said Tasmanian devil boxers? I don't pay attention the weather guys on the radio, because they're all just talentless hacks, anyway. ;)
from awittykitty :
Upstate we have a orange CAT on our local news who predicts the weather and does a fine damn job...Oh, and p.s. we don't really care if you can predict snow or not sweetie, we really just want to see a picture of you in your Tasmanian boxers. :-)
from nogooddaddy :
I froze my nuts off at the Mets game on Tuesday of last week. The snow that morning was a nice touch. And, you also were wrong about the hail storms in Raleigh on Monday. HEY...If I can hear you down here, I expect accurate weather for ME.
from poolagirl :
Just admit it! You radio guys are the ones who caused all this freakin' global warming shit!
from danddteacher :
When I was on a spring break trip back in my college days we convinced one of the girls in our group that the greyhound racing down in Florida was actually where they race greyhound buses. She bought it hook, line, and sinker!
from sarkasmo :
What the christ? I thought your comment on my blog about the bunny was tasteless (oh-so-), and then I read your story about the exploding poopdog. And now it's time to meet Dad for breakfast. >:(
from marinka-mp :
LMAO it sounds like a good idea
from lesbfriends6 :
You would make an excellent promoter for the werewolves on ice show! Have a good one!
from bitterwineuk :
Lol. Just goes to show how many US diaries are on here when I pick up the lingo. Hahahaha, oh well, Tally ho young chap. Chops Away.....
from mehiel :
Thank you for such a lovely comment! It really made my day. And yes, I am already in talks with Hiss about a tiara. :P
from warcrygirl :
Hey you! The Snarky 80's Button Poll is now up. Good luck!
from beckers-j :
Thanks for the get well wishes. And how much do you happen to know about having sex on NyQuil? :)
from pinkytusk :
dude!! sorry! how the hell do i take it off!?? it's there b/c i used to have the gold membership but i didn't renew it. Ok Ok.. i'll figure it out!! BLAH!!!!!
from talktomuch :
Read your St. Patricks/Shitty Day entry to the Hubby, now when we eat chicken he holds the bones up like he's about to toss them to the dog, then shakes his head and says we must learn from Dangerspouse. You are becoming quite the quotable fellow in my household, first the calling out 'Casey No' as you cast your fishing line and now the 'No Chicken Bones for the Dog' quips that are coming out. My family really enjoys your tales, while at the same time feeling great pity for your pup.
from captainron :
The generic stuff like happiness and fame are easy. Special orders take a little longer, but I'll see what I can do :-)
from cuddleslut3 :
awww thank you *so* much :) hope you are having a wonderful day
from mehiel :
Also, thank you for leaving such a nice note. :) I hope you do return soon!
from mehiel :
Actually, it was never published. We shopped it out, did query letters, the whole bit, but it didn't take. That really held me back for a while, but it's not going to do so, this time around. I know I can finish something major if I put my mind to it, and that's what I intend to do.
from postalpriss :
You're joshin' me right? Hey, who am I to discourage a gal from bringing back chivalry anyway??? haha Point taken. K
from mehiel :
That sounds disturbingly like an episode of "Farscape." Moving on. Even if you did have a shitty holiday, I'm glad the bones didn't break inside his intestines. The fragments are just like shrapnel, and they can shred up a stomach something fierce.
from awittykitty :
I'm so glad I read your listing bio first because I was going to say something about painting you naked and having to surpress my laughter about what I saw. Phew!
from f-i-n :
Poor doggy. Maybe you should've given him green beer instead of chicken bones.
from chakra-chick :
Your comment made me laugh...you're the best sweetie! Thanks for that so much. I think I really should consider the lesbian thing and don't worry, if I ever do---you will definately be the first to get photographic proof! By the way, you got a good recipe for deep fried ice-cream? It was absolutly divine and I would love to try and make it myself... Lovely day further to ya! ~smooches~
from awittykitty :
Oh like I would really give you a Supermodel's phone number. She'd probably end up either in traction or hideously disfigured by some stray fishing hook accident. No Dangerspouse...I think I shall protect the poor girl. p.s. Why am I STILL missing from your favorites list? You've already called me a slut and insulted my artwork. I think the initiation part should be about over, right? Sheesh.
from hissandtell :
Oh. See, my undertanding is that raw chicken bones are actually very good for dogs. What's not so good are the tweezers, jewellery pliers, nipple clamps, ropes, long leather strips, plastic surveying tape and other non-nutritive items which my omnivorous pica-pups also insist on stealing and eating. Those things tend to come out looking like, ah, misshapen Ben Wa balls and frequently require, ah, human digital intervention to, ah, oh never mind. Love, R xxx
from danddteacher :
It's actually a really cool trip. The state of NC sponsors this thing called NCCAT which provides 1 week seminars for teachers. You can pick ones that are related to your subject or completely off topic. It's more a renewal thing than a staff development thing. They have a campus in the mountains and one at the beach and usual the seminars are held there, but the one that I've gotten into is a broadway seminar so they're sending us to NYC for a week in August.
from mrscoble :
I'm concerned about your interest in the cleanliness of my grandmother's noony.
from trinity63 :
You learned a lesson smart ass:)
from trinity63 :
And....the lesson learned, do not feed the dog chicken bones:)
from nprmommy :
you are much more of a radio god than i could ever aspire to be! i identify with the lack of sleep, though. i'm the local host for morning edition, so i get into the station around 4am.....not nearly as bad as your former 1:30am, but it still leaves me sleep deprived. i really enjoyed reading about big-time radio. but it really makes me realize how hard it would be to go back to commercial radio after working at an npr station.
from hcatty :
Heeeyy! Coming from you, that's a compliment ;o) teehee
from nprmommy :
thanks for the enthusiastic comment and add as a favorite! i'm going to return the favor...
from skinnylizzie :
Hello! It's actually a bit complicated...involves many different people and a situation a couple of months ago...meh. I'm not much good at keeping secrets but this one I feel I have to keep or I could get a couple of people into a lot of trouble (and thank you...I never fail to be amazed when people actually read my brain vomit)
from xat :
How unnerving would it be to encounter chipper DMV/DEQ/MVA state government workers? It'd be a sign of the End Times, I'm certain. The other one is west coast drivers figuring out a four-way stop. Oy gevalt. **!X
from hcatty :
Just so's ya know... if you RSVP to the wedding invite I'm sending you, the ONLY bones in the entire building will be... well... you get the idea.
from daze-on-edge :
Next time you try the chicken with the dog... try RAW half frozen chicken quarter... NOT cooked anything chicken... Wild dogs never had cooked meat.LMFAO. Poor puppy. Doggy enema blegh, makes me ill just thinking about it.:p Daze
from her-story :
Uh, I, Uh, didn't get a snapshot of her skirt. Wanna know why? There isn't anything "tapable" in that skirt and I was shielding you from inevitable blindness and eventual gayness. Feel better? (I do a lil, thanks.)
from shortst101 :
LMAO..never know what kind of shit you will get yourself into!
from chakra-chick :
Geez...talk about a shit experience! Poor Casey---now I know never to feed my doggy bones...thank Casey for helping us find that out! Damn...all your hours and effort of slaving over a hot stove gone down the drain (or trash, whatever)---so sorry dear! Think a lesson is to be learnt here...no more going all out for St. pattys' day---stick with what NewWifey did---beer and TV! Have a lovely wee further sweetie! ~smooches~
from moosehunter :
Dear God! St Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland and St Spouse drove the bones out of corgi. My St Paddy's day was so relaxed by comparison with only the barest traces of fecal matter...
from nilliem :
its sick, sad and gross...and I just can't stop laughing....I'm so sorry your St. Paddy's day has a curse...hee hee....ok, I need a tissue, I'm crying laughing here....
from so-charming :
Thanks for the welcome back! Just to clarify, hypomania is the correct word... it's a milder form of mania, the hypo prefix refers to the fact that it's "beneath" full-blown mania. It's kind of awesome, actually, unless you do stupid stuff in the throes of it. And I can't make any promises. LOL
from acaldwell :
i hope that soda bread was cooked all the way thru!~~!
from bluemeany :
Right, so, no chicken bones for puppy -- check. Thanks for taking one for the team, man!
from thedetails :
Poor Puppy! Your entry reminded me of the time when my Mom gave my Rhodesian Ridgeback the bone from a ham, and he swallowed it whole. I don't have to tell you what happened after that, because you just lived it yourself. And then there was the time that my mother in law's Jack Russel Terrier ate rat poison and I had to make it vomit, and it did vomit. All over me, the sofa and pretty much the rest of the house. All I'm saying is that I feel your pain.
from poolagirl :
For God's sake, man! Take exra care on Thanksgiving! No turkey bones! I once took care of a lab whose parents had fed him chicken bones the day before. I got him to the vet just in time - with punctured intestines. They saved him but it cost about $1,800. This could only happen to you. Your wife was smart to lock herself away with the beer.
from goingloopy :
Damn you for updating while I'm at work. I share an office. I'm new here. I had to do some massive fake coughing so I wouldn't have to explain what I was laughing at. I hope the puppy has stopped with the projectile pooping. I would suggest some Imodium, but that would probably result in another expensive trip to DangerVet. :)
from xat :
Ow! Ow! Ow! My abs hurt! Ow! There's snot running out of my nose, I've been cackling for 8.32 minutes and my neighbours are concerned about my sanity (not that they weren't before). Poor, poor corgistein. **!X
from danddteacher :
That has got to be THE FUNNIEST thing I've read in a long time!
from awittykitty :
St. POOPtrick's Day....hahahahaha. Ok. I'm done.
from veralynn :
Laughed myself silly. I shouldn't have read that entry at my desk where I had to struggle to stifle the laughter. Entries like that should come with a warning label. ;-)
from la-blue-eyez :
That poor dog! I laughed, and actually felt guilty for it! But then I realized... I was laughing at YOU!!! :) We had corned beef and cabbage on St. Patty's day, but no soda bred. So how about if we just pretend that your house and my house split the meal...?
from mrscoble :
Yeah... you see, there's a huge difference between wild dogs and Corgis, who have been domesticated for hundreds of years. Their far more tender when it comes to digestion than their less civilized counterparts. At least you didn't kill him... this time.
from cosmicrayola :
That poor dog! I imagine one day, I'll see your name in red and come in to find the following: "I couldn't take anymore. Dangerspouse finally pushed me too far. He's gone now, but my belly is full and NewWifey(tm) and I are dong just fine without him. It turned out he was right about one thing. Bones won't hurt you if you take amall bites and chew them very slowly. His jaw was a bit tough though....... Casey.
from beckers-j :
Oh, God. Yeah, I'd say that my St. Patty's day was WAAAAAY less shitty than yours. What a nightmare! And your poor dog! That's really unbelievable. And you know what else is unbelievable? That you give your dog Lorna Doone's! Any unwanted Lorna Doone's you may have should be shoved in the direction of my mouth - not your dog's. ;)
from lumenatrix :
Oh mah Lawd. Poor, poor Casey. I'm glad he's ok, but man, that is funny. Oh, and the trick to boiled cabbage? Boil it in the corned beef water and pull it out about a minute before you think you should. Then eat it with vinegar. Not dog poo, vinegar. That's where you messed up. ;)
from beckers-j :
Holy moly! That would have scared the bejebus out of me for sure. ;)
from la-blue-eyez :
Is this the part where I'm supposed to say "Yes Master"? :)
from beckers-j :
I didn't hear about the "terrorist attack/HazMat" exercise. When was that? That's pretty crazy, and I probably would have hit the roof, too.
from veralynn :
Mouth is watering. *So* need that recipe! :) The contest is on!
from la-blue-eyez :
Are you one of the voices in my head?
from zencelt :
Yeah, you're right. It was my fault. That big baggy t-shirt, sweat pants and old sneaks were pretty enticing. No, really! That's what the 5 dollar girls wear here on the boulevard.
from chakra-chick :
Oh Tom! Trust you to put a smile on my face and temporary forget all my worries! You're such a sweetie. Thank you for understanding about my fleeting moment of being a cheating skank...a girl has needs too, right? Have a lovely day further dear! ~smooches~
from hissandtell :
"Very sad", you say? Were not anyway! Were the Germans sad when they bombed Pearl Harbour? Hell no! Love, R xxx
from f-i-n :
those headphones look cold....
from misspinkkate :
Do not tempt me! Next thing you know I'll be eating ice cream everyday and weighing 5,000 pounds.
from jcelyn :
OMG!! You were Rick Forest?! Wow, that is so amazing!! Especially since I had never heard of him before.
from her-story :
Oh geez, I know you're teasing. Though, I am still sick. I need a lil TLC: Tea, Lemon and Cookies. *grins*
from zencelt :
OK. That comment deserves a resounding "Fuck You!" Thanks for the birthday greetings though. You aren't off the hook for Tuesday, BTW.
from malthus :
DS...in regards to the "Justin" page - if you look at the comment I write about, "...you can sample his pros here." The word "here" links to his blog page. His Diaryland address is jwinokur.diaryland.com. About the voice tape...write me at [email protected] with any advice you may have on putting something together, as I have ZERO experience. I'm thinking about a voice DVD, with menus that link to a cover letter, resume, and all the voice clips you need to make your ears bleed. Ciao baby!
from pinkytusk :
haha.. my computer would probably crash!
from crazy4muffin :
Thanks for your note. For a pretty tough gal, this one really took the wind out of my sails. Your comments are right on the money; and I appreciate you saying it.
from her-story :
If I didn't like you, I'd tell you to go fuck yourself. So, considering you're still on my good side, I'll just laugh at you, in a moderately convincing way, and pretend you're really funny. Ya schmartass...
from beckers-j :
Aw, thanks for adding me. I'll try to have sex more often to keep you interested. ;)
from beckers-j :
"Feet have sole", huh? You're really somethin'. I'm adding you. ;)
from moosehunter :
Hi there matey. Just wanted to drop by and ask how the pirate trade was going? I presume you've switched to that lucrative career anyway, since the last note you left me started with 'Yar'. I scanned down for the words doubloon, lubber and scurvy dog, but couldn't find them. As we used to say about Moose T in our office, Avast behind!
from hissandtell :
That's Rick with a silent "P", right? Hey, congratulations on the new thingy, darling. Naturally, though, indubitably fine Dangerspouse buttocks and all large splashy advertising promos a la Carrie Bradshaw on a bus aside, I'm neverthless quite saddened by any "position" which restricts your opportunities to expose yourself in any capacity. (As, I'm sure, we all are.) Love, R xxx
from mrscoble :
It's okay. I married a redneck, too. I think he's insane. Who else walks on a jacked up toe and nearly loses it before seeing a doctor, only to have the nail ripped out, and insist that he must continue to do morning PT, even though it is against doctor's orders to do so? I mean, other than... well, um, never mind. I'll go back to my corner now.
from twoozin8tor :
"I am a Left Wing Liberal. Very left wing liberal." What are you talking about? You're fucking SATAN!! I mean, maybe you aren't actually fucking him... or her... then again, maybe you are... do. So. You're a liberal, huh?
from lumenatrix :
Oh my gosh, you're Magic! I got an A. :) Congrats on you return to an almost normal schedule, too. Oh, and stick to your liberal guns, my good man.
from beetilda :
Hello, Danger!! Always good to hear from you. By the way, I know what a petard is!
from beckers-j :
Congrats on the new job! Although I must say that I did happen to find bald-headed Natalie Portman sexy. ;)
from smedindy :
Aw, now, it's not a Brokeback Mountain kind of affection - just a mutual respect and beer or six or twelve. good luck on the new gig!
from her-story :
Its ok ds, I'll be fine. I don't think its my stereo as much as its the area where I live.
from chakra-chick :
NewWifey is my hero! Glad she no longer resembles someone out of a bad sci-fi movie! Congrats on the new opportunity---glad you are happy with the turn of events. Hope you have a fantastic weekend dear...and wish New Wifey a Happy St. Patricks' day from me! ~smooches~
from nilliem :
Whoo Hoo for your dangerself! Good to know NewWifey is back to herself. And I too, backtracked, ala Witty. Ummmmmmm...::evil grin::
from moosehunter :
Wow man! Better conditions? Sounds good. Enjoy the new work schedule. I've just been offered the opportunity to make mine a little worse, but that's actually good with our company. It's means less human interaction with pointless butt-holes and therefore less chance of a jail sentence for multiple murder! Nice to see new-wifey/frankenwifey's finally ok. Some day I'll write an American Horror Story about it and you'll recognise bits and curse me for stealing your history and the royalties! Life is getting better day be day! Nice to hear you online again man and I've exhorted other people to leave me notes other than you. Moosehunter. (Weary and wacky and wielding a serving spoon)
from bluemeany :
Aww, look at you, Mister Pluggy Pluggerton! You think because you're some bigshot radio man you can convince me to write bad erotica? Well you CAN'T. But you CAN make me say congrats on the new happy work schedule -- Congrats!
from mrscoble :
I knew it. The pain I'm feeling right now... it's the same one I feel every time someone I like is a damned commie. ::sobs::
from outfoxed :
Let's see. Hours get better, more exposure, same pay rate. Hmmm. Have to intro for Rush and Bill. The horror. Have you not yet learned that whoring is honorable? Boy, I sure hope your bosses see your upwardly mobile self as a BAD thing! Why, they'd likely start thinking weird things, like, "Hey, Mike Wallace just retired, howzabout rollin' the dice on some lefty from Jersey? He's gotta be more spiffy than Michael Moore." And they'd be, of course, correct.
from awittykitty :
When you mentioned your illustrious DangerAss, I immediately backtracked one entry thinking I had perhaps somehow missed a nekkid shot of your lovely ass. See what a one track mind I have? Congrats on being a big shot New Yawk radio guy. I only wished I lived closer so I could hear your dulcet tones.
from her-story :
Hey, rollicking mounds of man flesh... why aren't you on FM stations? Huh? Do you not realize that my 2001 vehicle dry heaves when I turn on an AM station?
from poolagirl :
Look at what I have to put up with - from the dangerspouse himself: << You called me and I was ironing my pants. >> Er..."ironing" is a euphemism for "creaming", right? Heh. Awww, thanks for such a sweet note, Pie Rat! Really, that was an ego stroke on a massive scale. I can't believe you even remembered I called! So few women do *sigh*.....
from radiogurl :
Well damn - congrats on the cushy new job. And as to the bad erotica *cracking knuckles and flexing bullwhip and handcuffs* If that ain't right up my twisted little alley, I don't know what is. I'm sooooo there, baybeee!!
from poolagirl :
Rick Forest? Who thought up that lame ass name? It sounds like something from "The Young and the Restless" - something that Fabio would use. *puke* You're right about one thing (probably many things but let's just stick to one) - when you get too good at something they can HANG you with stupid shit. I've heard your voice, and you're a heart melter. You called me and I was ironing my pants. What a sweet moment for me to remember for the rest of my life.
from acaldwell :
well, now, i will haveta change innernet radio stations now. i will be disapointed if yours dont have a listen now linky.
from her-story :
Now, T-man, you KNOW that I live in your area... and have heard your voice through MY radio... twice... so, what will I do now that I can't occassionally and accidentally tune in while you're doing the news? HUH? WHAT WILL *I* DO?!?
from haloaskew :
Well, I would start hanging out at the truckstop again, but I'm waiting for my, um... infection to clear up. You were a good customer, darling, but you gave me more than a (your) tip, dincha?
from shortst101 :
Hey, don't be looking at my nipples!! HA HA
from eastportgrrl :
Yeah I know you men are all skeevy(except maybe you)LOL... Thanks for the note! Happy St. Patrick's day!
from jamsjunction :
And about that fishing thing..Take it from a transplanted (Proper HAHAHA!)southern girl. An old fashion cane pole works far better then those new fangled ones. Although my hunter/fisherman husband would totally disagree. They are so sports. Professional sports at that. How about an update. You always make me laugh outloud!!!
from jamsjunction :
Careful what you wish for..Keep your eyes peeled, I might just be the next hormonal crack whore!
from her-story :
Space bar is to shoot and the arrow keys are to direct the cannon up or down. Geez, man, its not that hard...
from beckers-j :
Gummi bears, mozzarella and corn flakes - it's to die for. Kidding! Although, if you decide to try it out, let me know what you think. ;) Thanks for stopping by, and I'll be sure to let Ted know you're on his side.
from smedindy :
Oh, man. I just shooed my wife out of the room to do that - she came back in, though!
from candoor :
maybe he was faking the syphillus too, but then, it's all speculation 'til the fat lady sings... by the way, I heard the word chocolate and had to drool...
from malthus :
Dude, don't know a big hairy guy in a thong unitl yo...no...I take that back. You're right. Funny you mentioned me working in talk radio before - I'm about to produce a voiceover DVD to highlight my skiiiiills. Getting ready to thrust myself into the market...thong and all. Ciao baby!
from zencelt :
Only you... I do put out warnings before I go off the deep end. Hey, I will take a bottle of vodka and some high quality, dark chocolate. I might be PMSing...
from moosehunter :
Dangerspouse. I don't know why you're the only one who leaves me notes. Most of my readers are local (ish) and tell me things personally. You're the only one across the pond who talks. My latest entry's a bit depressing, but it explains why I've been getting nastier. Always nice to hear from you. Drop me a line. You've not said anything in a while. How's the gym and how's Frankenwifey? Moosehunter.
from chakra-chick :
Awwww Tom...NewWifey Can't be all that bad? Nevertheless, I glad you approve of my 'hottie' choice. Hope you are well and will be gracing us with your presence soon again... ~smooches~
from serenaville :
Thanks for the comment in my space! I appreciate learning the distinction, and will be certain to inform my oh-so-(playfully)-smug husband. It was nice to have you visit the 'Ville. Take care. :)
from malthus :
Dude...show me the money and I'm yours!!!
from divacowgirl :
Thanks! I think I'm safe from the tsunami so far.
from lumenatrix :
Thanks, danger. I actually have two chocolate cigars left... Perhaps one for him and one for me? Or is that a waste of good chocolate and I should just put my boot up his ass?
from cosmicrayola :
Sure, you can steal my jokes anytime, but it's about time for an update isn't it?
from talktomuch :
Thanks for leaving me a comment, I passed it along to Hubby who is now playing the wounded soul. Heh heh. Anyway, I'm glad that your Corgi is alright and I wanted to thank you for posting that entry, I shared it with my family tonight just before dinner and now my kids are running around the house playing fisherman and screaming "Casey No". The kids think that's part of fishing, sort of like when you're playing golf and you have to yell "Fore".
from her-story :
Yeah, well, that didn't stop him from being all snarky to me since he was accepted into a PhD program. THAT'S why I think its funny! Well, I don't have a whole lot else to embrace. So, quit ruining my fun.
from acaldwell :
OMG!!! fresh corgi steaks!!! what a trip!!! good thing new wifey(tm) knew how to take that hook out!!! whew!!
from candoor :
as usual, I'm left speechless... well, sort of... laughing and cheering on your adventures can be quite addictive... luckily you don't do this every day :)
from hcatty :
Alright! The proof is posted, my friend. One thing though. How is NewWifey at building a room on? Heh heh heh....
from zencelt :
Alright you pain in the ass. Not only did you pick on my spelling error (shameful you), but somehow you made me leave a scathing reply in someone else's notes. So, you back now? Huh?
from portia12 :
I ended up reading it all afterward. Your entries are the best. I especially enjoyed the shopping mall story! Thanks for your comment.
from her-story :
OH MY GOD... I'm laughing my ass off... you are a complete and utter goofball. I love that, ya know. Um... when you practice casting, as I did for MANY hours in my youth, GO OUTSIDE... and instead of tying an actual LURE onto your line, tie washers. This way no one ends up in the emergency room or on the local news. When I was a kid, I could cast very well, but I had issues hooking a worm onto the hook. It seemed so wrong to take this squirming gross icky thing onto a hook so some stupid fish could eat it. My dad was a *serious* fisherman that put his hunting-gathering skills ahead of his family. My mom STILL can't talk about her years as a hunting and fishing widow. All I know is that MY dad is NOT allowed to take the boys anywhere where there are hooks or bullets. (Trust me) The boys fish, and hook their own lines, and I don't have to touch the worms. I, instead, use salmon eggs or something jarred in a neon-colored chemical to keep it from living. Hope NewWifey is feeling better...
from bethany9 :
I love fish. Anyho... little you know! Wine in a box? You underestimate me! For your info, we had a few bottle of a 2003 Michaud Marsanne Chalone
from moosehunter :
I'll save you a poisonous aphid. If I knew the address, I'd post it to you. I'll just have to scan it in and Email you it!
from hcatty :
That photo of Becca will be posted on Friday morning, and it'll come down Monday morning. I posted that in an entry before I realized you might not see it lol SO - What kinda stakes are we lookin at here? What do I get when Becca wins? ;o)
from malthus :
Hey DS, Thanks for dropping in on me and leaving that oh-so-complimentary note. Yeah, well (in regards to your comment) great writing deserves some credit - especially in the world of Blog, where great writing is somewhat hard to come by. Oh and the kid...I think it might be the cable guy's, but the jury is still out... Chris
from chicagojo :
I spent one weekend at the lake without a hook even on my line, and it was some of the best fishing I've ever done. I think we'd get along well in our waders. Also, RE: the note you left me in my guestbook, are you handing me a piece of New Wifey? Sign me up! I could use a tile backsplash in my kitchen.
from goingloopy :
Thank you for adding me as a favorite. I'm all aflutter... :)
from bitterwineuk :
hey, thanks for dropping in on my survey. I don't how long you've been following me (or had an obsession with Mr Squarepants) but did you know I have a SBSP fish tank. :) I will be back. Becca
from radiogurl :
Cute fish story, and I want your recipe for Corgi a la King. Also, is it adaptable for mutt or do you require choice cuts?
from invisibledon :
That is true and it is probably my distrust of mass media and not a conspiracy to brain wash us all and is just simple capitalism. I only watch movies for the most part on TV and I love the Olympics so I suffer through most of the commentary but I'm very nearly all the way to the library and have many books I'm reading right now and ones with my son too. Thanks for an actual comment and not just the typical yeah yeah or you are so full of it and then not say why either way, hope things are well with you.
from poked2x :
I'm sorry everyone gets hurt at your house, but I had to tell you that your entry made me laugh till I cried. Thanks!
from mrscoble :
Yes, Christmas shopping. With luck, I'll have it all done before summer hits.
from cosmicrayola :
How could I miss that????? I just came back after reading your comment on Poolagirl's diary. I was so concerned about your dog and excited about talking fish stories that I completely missed that excellant butt shot of yours! To hell with your dog! To hell with the fish! Nice Ass!!!
from moosehunter :
I can sympathise with your whole 'don't want to drag a fish around by the lip' thing, being mostly Buddist (with a bit of Bastard thrown in). I've never been fishing but, being allergic to most fish, it's not a surprise. I showed your fishing entry to my colleague who's a keen fisherman and he laughed until he had to go into the gents!!! (Read into that what you will.) He saved the shark pic on his hard drive at work. Don't know whether he classes it as porn (he IS a fisah enthusiast as I mentioned.) Since you went away for what seems like a decade and came back to writing a while ago I've noticed that it seems that it's others that have started to suffer other than you. Have you got over your 'pink foam/attacked by vultures' years d'you think? Moosey
from jcelyn :
I laughed so hard I think I wet my pants! You're exactly my kind of fisherman DP, we've gone drift fishing for years and mostly it's a nice day on the lake. Do you live in an insane asylum? :)
from hcatty :
Hmm. She's being squeamish about the actual scar. There's a picture of the staples BEFORE she had them taken out, will that work? Her terms are that the picture will be posted for 3 days, after which it shall be removed or I will suffer a fate far worse than death.
from chakra-chick :
Oi Tommy! First you and your ankle, then Wifeys' forehead and now Caseys' furry cheek...you gotta get your house FengShui-ed or something! Yeah-at least you caught something-even if it just happened to be that of a four-legged doggie variety! Lovely weekend to ya! ~smooches~
from im2evil4u :
What�s a normal day in the DangerHouse like?
from hissandtell :
Ernest Hemingway would be proud of your blokin' accomplishment, darling. I bet HE never caught a dog - well, not on a line, anyway. Fishing shallow muddy outback billabongs for barramundi and yellowbelly and sleepy cod presents quite the challenge for a sheila like me, who learned to fish in the wide open spaces of the ocean and is used to assessing the water for depth and clarity and temperature before choosing the appropriate line, lure and hook to haul in all those Pacific sharks and stingrays and dugongs and dolphins with gay abandon. (Oh, come on; I always throw them back. I don't even eat fish - or chatty marine mammals either, for that matter.) Anwyay, all I've managed to successfully hook here in the bush is my husband's willy quite a few times when my casting has been obstructed by pesky high banks and bloody ubiquitous gum trees. These days I'm deemed simply too dangerous to be allowed to arm myself with a rod of any kind, so I'm restricted to sitting on the bank catching marron on a bit of string with bread on the end. Bastards. Love, R xxx
from cosmicrayola :
Ahh the memories. Picture it, Lake Winnapasakie, New Hampshire in the summer of '89. Me, my Fenwick Golden Eagle graphite rod, my Possum Belly 52 compartment tacklebox fully loaded and enough Hula-poppers to last a lifetime. I worked nights as an auditor at the resort. Spent every day down on the dock. Never caught a thing. Back in Portland, incoming tide I could fill a pail with Mackeral in 30 minutes. Yup, salt water fishing is the only way to go if you actually want fish. I feel bad for the pup. Hope he's ok after this.
from mrscoble :
"I don't know" says it all. Gorb says that's almost a legitimate answer. I'm just happy to hear you caught something.
from goingloopy :
Gee, and all my cats ever get stuck in their mouths are pieces of plastic bag that, despite years of evidence and many piles of cat chuck to the contrary, they still consider to be a digestible food stock. But, on the plus side, NewWifey got some practice pulling metal things out of someone's head, so when she goes for the needle-nose pliers, she'll have her technique down. Hopefully, though, there will be no further catastrophes at DangerHouse in the near future.
from nicim :
i'm trying to hard to find something to say. but speechless is the only adjective coming from my brain. NewWifey to the rescue!! Yes... XXOO N
from wildrosie :
First, I feel terribly slighted since you never sent ME any Mako shark steaks. Then again, I do prefer Thresher shark, but one can't be picky, can one? Now, unless you've gone Asian on us, I hardly think you would enjoy corgi steaks. I'll wager they are too tough anyway. My cat suggests marinating Casey in a pleasant sauce...but she's Himalayan and French, so what can you expect? But seriously, poor Casey! Hopefully the punctures won't get infected. ~Rosie~
from yeahimadork :
Your wife kicks ass. And it's clear who the femme is in the DangerHouse. *coughBetteMidlerlovercough*
from hcatty :
O_O ... To be honest, I'm a little queasy right now, with the image of not only staples in your wife's forhead, but a hook sticking through Casey's mouth. BUT! Becca wants to compare scars with NewWifey, as she had staples in her stomache after surgery last year.
from awittykitty :
I would think fishing in a Jersey waterway, you might be able to hook an old Mafia informant with a block of cement tied to his leg or something. At least they wouldn't put up as much as a fight as poor Casey.
from outfoxed :
Hmmm. Catch and release stuff. It's sporting but seems to be favored only by those who carry discount cards at the local fishmonger. Come on down South and I'll put ye on some ferocious bass that'll surely rattle your Rapala. Just leave the dog to home, okay?
from poolagirl :
OMG! Poor Casey! I'm glad NewWifey came to the rescue. And why, dear one, do you have WELDING GLOVES? At first read, I thought you said WEDDING GLOVES. I thought: What in the hell are wedding gloves? And then I read it again and saw what you had really written, and it made more sense. But now, it doesn't make sense! Most people do NOT have welding gloves. Only you, Mr. Danger. Only you. Mkae sure NewWifey uses a needle-nosed pliers when she performs her own brain surgery later. And for God's sake, don't try to help her!
from doobeedoobee :
Great to see you back Dangerspouse. Hope NewWifey is feeling better and thanks for consistantly bringing me to laughter tears.
from jcelyn :
Hope NewWifey is feeling better. Lucky you were there to play Superdangerspouse to the resue!
from hcatty :
OH you make me laugh! Usually at inopportune times, but there is ALWAYS laughter! Rest assured, the suspense is so high, it could've been a member of the mile-high club a LONG time ago. ;o)
from f-i-n :
Actually, it looks like a silver crown on her head, the kind that a princess would wear...Hugs to you!
from chakra-chick :
Awwww...I'm sorry Tom sweetie, but this long distance thingy really wasn't working for me at all...untill we will be together agian; he's just keeping me company, K? By the way, no kidding, the GREEN TEA thingy really works-I lost 3.5kg in about 9 days (but thats coz I excercised too). Have a lovely weekend dear. ~smooches~
from star-cross-d :
for easy weight loss. drink green tea. alot. it speeds up your metabilism. totally awesome, not gunna lie its the easy way out. i, eternal chubby kid, lost a whole pant size in a like 3 weeks.... excercising never did that for me (stupid fitness) but yeah. just htought id share that.
from hcatty :
OUCH! Poor NewWifey. Hope he gets all better real quick like so you can have a gym again ;o)
from onewetleg :
maybe she could just wear a very stylish helmet whist stopping herself from breathing by inhaling toxic particles. just a thought. she wears one while riding motorcycles, right?
from smedindy :
Thanks for the comment. Don't be a stranger! And ouch, staples in the head!
from moosehunter :
No unnecessary humour (from a lardy British guy). Just nice to see you write again man. See ya in the funny pages, Dangermountain...
from wench77 :
Wow, does this mean you're gonna get even fatter? I mean, is she gonna get the work done on the gym? (see I'm more concerned about you than her hairline... lots of people pay big money to get surgical steel body mods and jewelry like that! She's lookin goooood!) Or maybe you could put her up high somewhere and run UP and down and UP and down tending to her every need? (beer, sinus stuff, large macho mechanical playtoys, more beer) Thanks for a great entry. It is so wonderful you all create so many catastrophes with such good humour (do you REALLY get along that jollily at home??)... we appreciate the chronicling when you get around to it. cheers! ps, I still owe you something in exchange for the DangerMix.
from hg88 :
Hello! :) It is good to hear from you! Thanks for checking out my myspace. I don't update it as much as I should, but I do update it more than I do here... I dunno, I've just lost my writing motivation, which is sad because I'm forgetting a lot of really cool things. Ah well, I guess. Hey, in two months when you're on next (:P) you should run over to myspace and send me an e-mail with YOUR e-mail, and maybe we can hook up on MSN or something? Well, not hook up, but you know what I mean. I think. Stop being dirty!!! Heh, anyway, hope things are going well with you. I will hopefully talk to you later! ~Sasha
from yeahimadork :
As a redhead, I resent your disparaging comments. If I weren't so pigheaded, truculent, belligerent, bumptious, stubborn, and obstinate, I'd be offended. And that pic of the wife in Poolagirl's diary just shows how clearly sedated she has to be all the time to live with you. I've long suspected, but now I know for sure. She's got a nice rack, though. If you were a real man (insert joke here) you would have shown YOURS. I look forward to your next update in 48 days.
from awittykitty :
So if wifey(tm) is frankenwifey? Does that make you DangerIgor? Glad she's ok and I think a Higgens library sounds pretty groovy. Maybe you could bench press "War and Peace".
from amberstone :
Wow, glad NewWifey is okay! I was so unprepared to read that she got hurt. My best to both of you here's to a quick recovery. *raises a beer*
from bluemeany :
You have no idea how badly I want a reciprocating saw now. NewWifey(tm) is my hero.
from mrscoble :
It's not just redheads. Girls raised to know their tools and destruction methods are stubborn. Besides, the respirator makes it hard to see what you're doing.
from nilliem :
Hey!! Ouch. Dude, I hope the girls and all are getting back to normal.
from poolagirl :
Dang! What a nasty-ass accident - told only the way YOU can tell it to make me laugh. Dang! Sore-boobed wifey must have one hell of a headache. Give her a gentle hug for me and hand her the remote for the TV.
from bigpimpinmba :
With all the random injuries, I think your (and wife's) last name must be (Dangerspouse) "E. Coyote... Supergenius". And I'm glad to hear that I have a great rack in your dreams of me, you big feyg.
from her-story :
OH GEEZUS MAN... I'm so glad you have compassion for your injured wife (*waves to wifey*)... hope she feels better soon!
from cosmicrayola :
Hey! Everone likes a little ass, nobody likes a wise one. (Brat)
from chakra-chick :
As we in South Africa would say - "EINA" - (translation-Ouch)---poor Wifey! I hope she feels better soon. Don't you dare stay away for so long again! Miss you lots! Take Care. ~smooches~ Faz
from shortst101 :
WOW.....I swear you guys always have something going on. Glad that she's doing okay. Hugsss, miss ya.
from goingloopy :
Redheads are not stubborn. We're NOT. We are just passionate in our beliefs. That said, I hope NewWifey(tm) makes a full recovery and that the removal of those staples doesn't hurt as much as it looks like it would.
from radiogurl :
The Frankenwifey look is a good one for her. And the more I read about her, the more I'm wondering if she's related to MC... Stories soon to follow...
from outfoxed :
Oh man, I hope she heals quickly. Thassa wicked cut.
from cosmicrayola :
So all redheads are stubborn idiouts, huh? I resemble that remark! Take it back or I'll hold my breath til my face turns blue! Seriousley, I'm glad she's ok. Alcohol = powertools = disaster. Basic Math 101
from wildrosie :
Jiminy Crickets! I think you might need to get a mistress just to take care of Frankenwifey! Then again, having you as her devoted slave might work OK too! *LOL* Oh, and when she's finished there, I have a bathroom addition that has been sitting for 2 years now...But truly, I'm glad that it wasn't as bad as it could have been, and hopefully she will be back to normal soon. ~Rosie~
from haloaskew :
I saw your comment to Crazy4Muffin tonight (2/5/06). You lurking bastard whore-man! POST. NOW. Or no blowjob for you, sailor.
from crazy4muffin :
A rotten egg isn't anything the ingredient "copious amounts of bourbon" cannot cure. And if that glass comes off your face leaving a hearty nutmeg mustache, then you have made the ultimate nog. Or was that just my family.
from wendyloo :
well I ended up staying around here for now, just went cheap and stopped paying, but thanks for caring about lil ole me :)
from amberstone :
You said: "Or maybe I'm actually - despite all protestations to the contrary - just that low class after all." Maybe. But *real* low class is when you must have the can of jellied cranberry on a tray, cut up into slices right where the can indenting the jell. Now, THAT'S class! Heh...
from hcatty :
And one more note, just for old time's sake. Teehee.
from hcatty :
OH! And my mom makes the BEST eggnog. Alcohol free. Because I can't get her to make it with. Or give me the recipe.
from hcatty :
Happy New Year really really really really really late.
from lasweetthing :
I will be locking this diary up soon! You can find me at jalepenogirl
from smiletenshi :
Beautiful! This will surely grace my table next Christmas, regarding I have a moment between diaper changings. <3
from chakra-chick :
Thanks for the recipe...I mysef have never had eggnog ever-I did, however, have a taste 'egg-flip'. Thanks for the recipe, I might try it out sometime...omitting the booze, of course. And where is the cookie recipe? You can't hold out on us...
from hg88 :
You! Happy new year to you as well, darling. :) I haven't been updating much, but what little I have been is at http://www.myspace.com/reneedarkmoon if you are interested at all. *shrug* Anyway, I'm glad to hear from you! I miss your updating regularly a lot, as you just have a unique way of putting things that makes me laugh. I hope you're doing well! ~Sasha
from clarity25 :
I'm so glad you're back, Mr. Spouse. Happy New Years. Best wishes to you and NewWifey(tm) in the year 2006.
from onewetleg :
the talk of egg yolks and rum. so hot. come fuck me danger
from acaldwell :
i dont drink the goo, but i have my own goo, spam and cheese sammichs and ice cold milk!!
from haloaskew :
I only forged a solid relationship with Nog in my early 30's. I'm lucky to pick some up at the store before beginning to slurp down the bottle of spiced rum I buy during the holidays, so I'll pass on the homemade treatment (until I get some patience). So are you BACK now on a semi-regular basis at D-land, or merely teasing us? You are SUCH A MAN WHORE. Hence, I heart you.
from candoor :
Merry Happy New Year (again :)
from nilliem :
Happy New Year, man! Someday I'll have the chance to try the 'real' nog...till then, the goop it is!
from treewillow :
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!! And where are my cookies? I want whipped shortbread cookies :).
from poolagirl :
You have turned into Martha Dangerstewart! Holy crap, Batman! "Saffron" eggnog? This is coming from a guy who put a ferret on his face and posed for a pirate picture? Dang, man!
from lumenatrix :
The only kind of egg nog I can stomach is the uncooked kind. Mmmmmmm.... raw egg... Since most eggs are pasturised at this point I have no problem staring down the threat of salmonilla. I laugh at it through my liquored up haze. Hahaha. As kids, though, we had root beer floats. My mom doesn't like nog in any form.
from awittykitty :
Egg Nog? Ya mean Christmas spackle with a bird flu chaser. MMMM. Yum. (wretch). I think wifey(tm) is definitely onto something there, Dangerspouse. Oh well. Have a great 2006. Love, wit.
from nixtress :
Let me add to the last note: unbroken and UNSURGERIED appendage. And Ick-yay on the og-nay. I can't even stomach the storebought, cartoned stuff. I have that neverending image of eggs in my head that just won't let me put it near my mouth. It's an egg phobia, maybe. Or maybe, it's a snot-like-consistency phobia. Who knows? At any rate, enjoy yours and I'll settle for a nice vanilla creme from Starbuckets.
from nixtress :
Happy, happy, happy, happy Unbroken-appendaged New Year! May 2006 overflow with lots of grace, oral sex, good health and happiness for you and your wifey. :)
from her-story :
I kinda thought that's what Runny Honey was... but it was more fun waiting for you to explain it. *pffft*
from her-story :
And, I, too, should thank Dr. Tubal Ligation... tho a little too late.
from candoor :
Happy Merry Merry Happy and every day too, may 2006 be stupendous year for you (and all those you love :)
from candoor :
I never had real egg nog... in fact, I don't remember the last time I had cartoned egg nog... many years, at least... does egg nog come in chocolate? :)
from her-story :
What the HELL is "runny honey?" By the way, HAPPY 2006, or rather, I hope that it's happier than 2005. Does that make sense? :)
from chaosdaily :
i love eggnog because my mother used to make the raw kind like you do to get nutrition into us when we were sick, and it was easy to drink with a sore throat. yummy! i drink the storebought stuff, but much prefer homemade!!
from yeahimadork :
Jesus, it's about time you turn your notes back on. Eggnog is disgusting. Besides teeming with raw eggs, I can't drink anything called "nog". I don't even know what that is, but the word nog is enough of a deterrent (unless of course, it's called "cheesenog", then all bets are off. Mmmm... cheese). Toll House cookies rock the house. They taste just as good (ok, I'll say it - usually better) as homemade, and don't make a mess of my kitchen. Which is why I show the people I care around the holidays how much I love them - by spooning dough out of a tube onto a cookie sheet and baking for 9-11 minutes. Tasty! ps - I'm glad to see you updating again.
from niceguymike :
You have me at a disadvantage, sir. *I* had to make do with just myself, a Pie-Rat hat and a digital camera held at arm's length. I had no magnificent facial hair, a lovely crew member, an eye patch or any of the other things that graced your photos. Oh, and I completely hate eggs, so I'll pass on the nog. I'll raise a toast to you if I ever get ahold of more Whidbey's Loganberry Liqueur, though. Indiana is not one of the great wine states of the world, unfortunately.
from wendyloo :
I prefer the fresh from my local dairy variety with some Capt. Morgans. Yummm. Too much work for the orginal.
from mrscoble :
I'm one of the unwashed that prefers the store bought goop as well. No shame here. I was raised on it, and can't let a single holiday season pass without bringing some home at least once. This year, I tried out SoCo's stuff. Without the whiskey, of course.
from cosmicrayola :
I used to make my own. Much better. I made it without the acohol though, because my kids loved it too. I would add my Captain Morgan spiced rum to my glass. Ahhh. I can taste it now. These days, I buy the store-bought. Although it's ok, it never quite lives up to the home-made.
from bluemeany :
Hooray, an update from you! Drink some extra nog for me this year, okay? In fact, get totally PLASTERED for me this year. And make out with people. And then I will be vicariously fulfilled. Happy New Year!
from la-blue-eyez :
I hope you and your wife have a Merry Christmas and a very happy New Year!
from smiletenshi :
Sad excuse! Get your arse back here. Needless to say, your airplane expose had me rolling in the computer chair. Tell me, did you ever end up getting off - or just her? O_o
from lasweetthing :
I think thats just a poor excuse guys use, cause they can't keep there word or commitments! Besides, if I did cut him off...it would only be for like one time, not days, weeks, months, etc... I'm not cruel. Trust me, my hubby has the best world, I just think he should be a little more appreciative. Have a nice day ;o)
from hcatty :
Missed you, you crazy man!
from candoor :
and let that be a lesson for ya!... oh wait, I forgot to reprimand you for staying away so long... and you are right, you do attract a lot of lesbians, after all, I am a lesbian in a male body... these snippits from conversations that may never have happened make sense in some alternate universe, ultimately, but right here and now, welcome back my friend and hope your show never ends...
from lasweetthing :
Nice to see you back ;o)
from chakra-chick :
yay! I'm so glad that you have returned!
from tuckandsophi :
It's about damned time! Sheesh! You can't retire! Who would we pick on then? Who to plunder? Ooops! You caught poolagirl writing with our log-on. Bitch!
from mrscoble :
Holy crap, you're alive, and for a change, you didn't do it to yourself. I'm impressed. The hubby, he loved the guest entry on hissandtell's diary. Good stuff.
from la-blue-eyez :
I'm glad you're back! I've missed ya!
from bigpimpinmba :
Welcome back. Nice entry...... Dick.
from her-story :
Damn and I just left a note at hissy's telling you to TURN them on again. I guess you miss us, eh?
from radiogurl :
Well I'll be darned. Not only have you been retrieved from semi-hermitdom, but you've turned your notes on again. Bravo and all that rot - but I'm still the ugliest ;)
from nilliem :
OOOOhhhh, you just made my week!! I'm so happy to see you are back!
from beetilda :
It was excellent! Rah for Hissy, for getting you back!
from nicim :
at long last - i know what all the ruckus is about. Long Live Dangerspouse. unlike your other rabid fans, I can wait through your long silences by simply reading your archives. After which....I sic on you the boobalicious wonderfulness of hissandtell to assure more regular updates.
from hissandtell :
Smooch, possum. Come back quickly to us with a "How I very nearly blew off my own dick with a particularly explosive Catherine wheel during the fourth of July fireworks at Dangerhouse, except that NewWifey(tm) narrowly managed to put out the flames with her nasal secretions because she was snorting so much" story, please darling! Much love, R xxx
from nixtress :
Miss your updates like crazy. I hope you and yours have a great 4th of July weekend. Be safe and know we're all patiently (some impatiently) waiting for you to come back.
from allegedwife :
Did you fall into a hole or something? Come back........please
from pandionna :
Yo. Where you at?
from lumenatrix :
I hope all is well in the Dangerhouse. Come back soon...please...pretty please
from hg88 :
Dangerboy! I miss you! :( You have vanished without a trace! All I can say is that I hope you, NewWifey(tm), and Casey are okay.
from plucky4 :
Come back! Please?
from her-story :
Ok, I'll bite... are you in the witness protection thing?
from wench77 :
Is it my imagination or have you disappeared? Oh, it is MY FAULT!! I have not yet sent your thankyou prezzie for the Dangermix and you are pouting... or maybe sobbing in disappointment! Maybe I'll just wrap up the Fat Chicks in Bondage and send it, and then you can watch it and have something to post about....
from haloaskew :
Are you ever coming back, or must I resort to inventing a contraption that will allow me to gulp my own piss, in order to duplicate the feeling you give me? But then again, it's not quite the same. You're like Mountain Dew...with a extra weird twang. I believe the secret ingredient is dog spunk. (COME BACK, even if it's only to defend yourself and the contents of your stomach)
from bluemeany :
Damn, your wife's disease sounds even worse than the Kuwaiti Crud. By the way, I checked, and they don't sell burqas at the bazaar. Would you like a lovely bronze camel souvenir instead? Or maybe some fake silver jewelry? I bet I could buy someone's daughter if you need one of those. Just let me know ...
from nilliem :
Dear Danger, I owe you tribute, no doubt. I missed 7 of the total, and the songs now rock my kids world. Best house cleaning mix I've ever had. Do you like rhubarb? Spicy rhubarb? I'll email you for specifics, but just thought I'd admit in public what you'll be getting. Eventually
from bexkaos :
dammit danger, could you update more than once a month, not that i live vicariously through you, but the suspense as to how your going to maim/murder/disfigure/russle up a sweet supper is really... i wouldnt say killing me... annoying me sure... le sigh..
from imaphatpig :
Funny that you should offer because laundry happens to be my FAVORITE HOUSEHOLD CHORE ever! I shit you not. I LOVE doing laundry.
from xquzme :
Best descriptive writing on DLand. You're a helluva writer, Danger. BUT. Could you PLEASE add some kind of a warning about weblinks? The "pepper in ass" link is probably not something I want my IT boys to know I hit at work. A-hem. (What is UP with people anyway?!) Glad NewWifey(tm) is on the mend -- and as for you, mister, really the only answer to a sprain is copious amounts of painkillers. And beer.
from iambucket :
Nope. No way. Regardless of your profession...and my understanding of your rules....I'd kick your butt if you disappeared when I was ill. The LAST thing I'd give ya was any bootie too, that's for damn sure! Sorry, but yet one more point to add to the "101 reasons DangerSpouse is an ass" List! Glad wifey is feeling better...quite an experience! Too bad you didn't break your mouth too when your accident occured. Oh but why is it, despite all of that, that I still adore you so?? *sigh* Must just be that small warm place in my heart you keep tugging at. Btw- because of your actions, you will NOT be getting any more pictures, my friend! *w*
from sasori-gal :
Hi there! Thanks for your note~ it made me feel so much safer (NOT) that I swear I'm going to sleep in bug net tent for the days I'm here!! More importantly, thanks for introducing yourself and your great diary! That last entry had a little of everything~ hope you're out of DangerLand.
from kitchenlogic :
Thanks Tom! I'm going to a) slow down and b) stay off the moon! And when in the hell did you drop off of my Buddy List? Probably when I felt the need to alphabetize the damn thing. No wonder you hadn't updated in a while! Well, you had - I just didn't realize it. Must go re-alphabetize that damn list!
from smiletenshi :
wtf, DS? Ew... figging? :\
from nypizzas2 :
Thank you Lord Spouse. A comment from you is worth a million from a mere mortal.

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